All language subtitles for Christiane.Amanpour.Six.and.Love.Around.the.World.S01E02.1080p.HEVC.x265-MeGusta

[ Lively music plays ]

AMANPOUR: Delhi is both
the political brain

and the protesting fist
of India.

The capital city
may be more progressive

than many parts of the country,

but it's still a place
where intimacy

can be governed by family,
tradition, and religion.

I want to explore
how women can find love

and sexual happiness

if they don't always have
the power to say yes or no.

[ Dramatic music plays ]

Delhi is a city
of over 18 million people

that's constantly growing.

[ Horns honking ]

Thank you.

Whoo.

People come here
to get an education...

...to find work...

...and maybe even love.

I'm told that habits

are becoming more Westernized
in urban India.

Women are marrying later,

and young people
have more of a say

in choosing a partner.

There.
Ooh, I see a boy and a girl.

We're coming right at them.

So I'm hitting the streets
to learn more

about Delhi's sexual status quo.

I'm sorry to stop you
on the street like this,

but I want to ask you
about your coupledom.

We are not a couple.

Oh, what are you?

-Hi, guys.
-Hey.

Can I talk to you?

-Salaam.
-Salaam. How are you?

-How are you?
-Very good, thank you. Fine.

-We always see you on the --
-On the television.

-Are you guys married?
-Yeah, we got married.

For a love match,
or was your marriage arranged?

A love match.

And what did your parents
say about that?

Nothing, because
the religion was same.

-So it was fine?
-Yeah, it's fine.

-And you?
-I was arranged marriage.

And how did that
work out for you?

It's good, very good.

And what do you think
of the young people

who want to just get married
on their own?

They should go for
the arranged marriage.

-Why?
-Because love marriages

does not give long time.

[ Laughter ]

Is he related to you?

-Yeah, he's my father.
-He's your dad?

[ Laughter ]

What is it like to date
in India?

Because I mean, you know,
society is quite...conservative.

-Is it acceptable?
-Yeah.

Can you go around
holding hands, hugging?

[ Laughs ]
He's laughing.

Here in India,
you cannot roam freely.

I am just holding her hand.
Nothing else I am doing.

The aunties watch, like,
"What are you doing," yeah?

So all the aunties are watching?

-Like four eyes.
-Four eyes.

-Can you kiss?
-No, we cannot kiss in public.

-Some privacy --
-Yeah, yeah.

So do you cuddle?
Do you...

Not in public, but we do, yeah.

Normal intimacy is a good thing,

but too much
is against the parents.

Okay, what is normal intimacy?

Like kissing and hugging
and holding hands.

Kissing and hugging's okay?

And too much is what?

-Sex.
-Sex.

I know this is private, but are
you going to have been intimate

-before your wedding night?
-No.

-No.
-No?

It has been
four and a half years

that we are in a relationship
but to that extent, never.

Do you guys have sex
before marriage?

-WOMAN: No.
-MAN: I have.

You have?
And you?

-I have.
-You did? See, boys.

Ah, well, it's okay.
It's their choice.

I'm not comfortable,
so I am not gonna do it.

CHILD:
Twelve, eleven, ten, nine,

eight, seven, six, five,

four, three, two, one.

AMANPOUR: Do we come here
with preconceived notions

about what it is to be Indian?

MULCHANDANI: That's what
they say about India,

that everything you think
about India is true

and everything that's opposite
of it is also true.

A lot of Westerners
perceive India to be

as this traditional,
bound society

which is kind of frozen in time.

We're a modern nation.
We're a young nation now.

And a lot of it is changing.

AMANPOUR: Intimacy, is that
something people focus on here?

Um, no.

I didn't think
you were gonna say that.

I thought that was
a dumb question.

Sandhya Mulchandani

is a Delhi-based
journalist-turned-author.

She writes about love,
erotic literature,

and Indian masculinity.

MULCHANDANI:
When you get married,

you marry the entire family,
as you know,

so my generation
or the ones previous to it,

intimacy was something
the husband would have

looked at you, saying,
"What are we talking about?

Because I provide
and I look after you,

so what is intimacy?"

Have you answered
that question for yourself?

[ Both laugh ]

Yes.

Intimacy is a fairly modern
concept today,

-for younger people.
-Yeah, yeah.

And it is something
that they're building.

AMANPOUR: So I find it
very counterintuitive

that there are young women

talking openly about sex,
about what they want.

MULCHANDANI: Women who
wore saris all their lives

suddenly are wearing trousers.

Women who are ambitious,
who seek their own partners,

who seek their own career paths,

are able to sing, dance,
smoke, and be themselves.

It's a huge change in India,
and it's aspirational.

AMANPOUR:
I see these notices up,

one that says, "Eve teasing
is an offense."

What is that?

Young men who used to think

that was a fun thing,
to tease women,

and a lot of it came
from Hindi cinema,

where the hero
always teases the girl,

the girl that caught his eye,

to kind of turn her attention
to him.

But the problem is
when it becomes harassment,

-because women are scared.
-Mm-hmm.

You don't want to
take the men on.

AMANPOUR: One group of women
who've found a way

to outpace some of this
unwanted attention

are the Delhi Bikerni.

This all-female biker club
takes on the traffic

and goes on regular rides
together.

Cow!

AMANPOUR: Today, they've invited
me to come along with them.

We're heading to one
of their roadside hangouts

in Gurgaon,
on the outskirts of the city.

All right!
Wow.

Thank you, ladies.
That was fun.

That was a first.

Whoo!

It's like a death trap here,

and the cows on the road!

Whoa!

Kind of unusual, isn't it,

in India, to have
a female biker gang?

SHABNAM: Typically, women are
brought up from childhood

with the thought that
you don't do this,

you don't do that.

You're given a lot of things,

what you don't do,

and we've broken through
all of that.

GYPSY: So there are
different kind of reactions

that I get when I ride.

There are people
who come up to me

and who give a thumbs-up.

Very happy to see
that a female is riding,

but then there's
a different lot, as well,

who tries to be aggressive
with me,

tries to come close to me
while I'm riding,

so that's also there.

Essentially, I started
riding a bike when, uh,

somebody was teasing me
on a bus station,

and I said,
"Okay, enough is enough.

I'm not taking this anymore,

and I'm not going
by public transport."

And just to be clear,

Eve teasing is not
some benign little teasing.

It's harassment.

The real word is harassment.

-Do they touch you?
-Rub against you.

-Yeah, yeah.
-They'll touch you.

They'll rub against you.

-AMANPOUR: Really?
-Grab at you.

It's that blatant?

-That blatant.
-Yes.

And to any age woman?

-Any age woman.
-Yes, yes.

It's not age-specific.

It can happen even with minors,
actually.

I went through it as a minor,
as well, so I know that.

Did you experience that?

That's the reason why
I took up riding,

because not only does biking
gives me freedom to ride,

but it also saves me from all
that hassle that I go through

on the public transport.

I have grown up in Delhi.

All my education
has been in Delhi,

and I also feel that
Delhi's not a safe place.

I don't feel safe here.

I'm very sorry to say it,
but that's the truth.

[ Crowd chanting ]

AMANPOUR:
Delhi has become the subject

of intense media coverage.

Radicals have been known
to attack young couples

for showing affection in public

and groups of women who were
out socializing and drinking.

[ Indistinct shouting ]

A brutal gang rape and murder
in Delhi in 2012

turned the spotlight onto the
issue of sexual violence here,

a subject which many feel
has been ignored for too long.

[ Crowd chanting ]

Delhi has since been described

as the fourth-most dangerous
city in the world for women.

So that is the reason
you decided to get a bike?

SHABNAM: That is the reason
where I started on a bike.

The thing is, with a bike,
it's addictive.

It was an extension of my body.

-It was freedom.
-SHABNAM: It was freedom.

And like she said,

the recognition you see
in other people's eyes.

That makes such a difference.

That's why I'm always there

for young girls trying
to learn how to ride.

-It gives you a sense of self.
-Mm-hmm.

You're no longer
ready to take shit.

I mean, you know,
amen to that, sister.

If a guy has problems with
your riding, he's not for you.

My way or the highway.

[ Laughs ]
On a bike.

-Literally.
-[ Laughter ]

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

What do you feel when you know
that people all over the world

look at this country
and they ask,

"Why is there this violence
against women?"

We don't quite have a culture
where boys met girls naturally

and had friendships.

It's always seen
as a sexual relationship.

AMANPOUR:
And yet this in a culture

that has literally more than
a thousand years

of the Kama Sutra, erotica,
almost liberal sexuality.

Liberal sexuality which accepted
a society of variation

and lived with it comfortably.

Now, when you are actually
trying to impose laws,

whether it is by judiciary
or by politics

or by any other standards,

you're actually hedging in
these people

and forcing them
into subverted behaviors,

which is not natural.

But there's a lot
of media coverage,

and there's a lot more awareness

that these things
should not be done.

These are ordinary men

stepping back and saying,
"I'm not that man."

AMANPOUR:
That's a good change.

MULCHANDANI:
Yeah, because you cannot

change a society overnight.

[ Electric guitar music plays ]

AMANPOUR: Premarital sex
is considered immoral

by most people in India.

Unmarried couples attempting
to check in to a hotel

will often be refused a room,

and living together
before marriage

isn't always an option, either.

Seeking out
the right relationship

is difficult
at the best of times,

so how does that work
in a country

where inter-caste matches,
love marriages,

and sex outside of marriage

are still taboo
for so many people?

So what about the boys?

I mean, look, I ask you
in the context

of arranged marriages.

Everybody's complaining

about what it's like
to love, sex, date.

It's a lot more fun
than you give it credit for.

-For you?
-Yeah, for me.

I mean, this is obviously
one of those things

where we live
in a little bubble.

RUKUN:
Liberals, fairly privileged.

Exposure to outside of India.

NAOMI:
We're anglicized as all hell,

so we tend to have gotten a lot
of those kind of values.

RUKUN:
We did grow up with parents

whose primary concern was
to study, study, and study.

As opposed to marry,
marry, marry?

-Absolutely.
-I think we're very lucky.

What is -- What is
your sex life like?

-[ Both laugh ]
-Active?

Yes, very, very much so.

I don't like dating one person
at a time.

-Oh, really?
-NAOMI: Yeah.

So I think Tinder has been, uh,

a lot of help in that regard.

There's Tinder here?

Oh, yeah, Tinder is huge here.

I don't know how
I'd meet people without it.

Tinder came in with,
like, full force.

Everybody knew about
what Tinder was,

so slowly, it started
with the upper crust,

and then it just went down
to everyone.

But the interesting thing
to note is,

Tinder struggled so much,

'cause the country doesn't know
the concept of dating.

So that's interesting.
So dating just doesn't happen?

-Yeah.
-Not -- Not so much,

because the idea that
everybody's always fed

is, like, we're priming you up
for marriage.

So a lot of apps now

have to actually
put conversations out there.

This is, like, what it means
to ask someone out.

-How has this affected the boys?
-NAOMI: They hate it.

It's one of the only spaces
in India

where the girl actually
has more power than men.

Really?

Because there are so many men.

I may be swiping on every guy,

and chances are I will match
with all of them.

-NAOMI: Yeah, pretty much.
-But the men

will not have the same option.

Because?

I think the difference
comes from the fact

that in India,
good girls don't date.

You can date quietly,

but you can't have
a public profile out there

that says, "I'm available.

I'm possibly sexually active."

-They're all covertly dating.
-NAOMI: Yeah, that's true.

You're doing it, but you're just
not letting anyone else know,

lest people think
you're not virtuous.

-Not a virgin?
-Absolutely.

That's still a big deal,
to be a virgin when married?

NAOMI:
That's still very much a thing

where if a guy's fucked
around, it's all right,

but if a girl has, he's gonna
have to be okay with this,

rather than being
not an issue at all.

A lot of Indian women end up
discovering their sexuality

online, like through erotica,
through writing, through porn.

So porn here is liberating
for some women?

-For me, it has been.
-Yeah, exactly.

-Always.
-Yeah.

RUKUN:
Sex ed in the country is dismal.

The most popular way
of learning about sex

is mainstream porn,
where, you know,

the woman has to be subjugated,

and it starts with, like,
the woman giving head.

In the middle, the guy's gonna
go down on her for five minutes,

then finally start having sex.

Eventually ends up with a guy
coming on the woman's face.

And that's mainstream?

RUKUN: That is mainstream,
even in the U.S.

I think men think
that this is how

sex is supposed to be had.

Men do very little
to accommodate women's needs.

NAOMI:
Oh, yeah, they're terrible.

You said they're terrible.

Men just don't like
to give head.

The penis is still
the center of attention.

In this particular culture,
they've always seen women

as a kind of function
of their needs and their roles.

Certain men in India
have a bad reputation.

I'm not entirely certain that
it's a necessarily Indian thing,

as against a patriarchy thing.

This kind of stuff happens
in American campuses,

but you wouldn't go so far
as to say

white frat boys kind of got
a bit of a rape-y problem

happening over there, you know?

While rape by itself is endemic,

gang rape is --
I wouldn't say as endemic.

There's a lot of media focus
on it.

RUKUN:
And yet women like me

are constantly looking at
their watch and being like,

"Well, this is, like, dark.
Now I need to go home."

'Cause it's just too dangerous
to walk home in the dark?

And no amount of privilege
can really help you,

'cause it's essentially
in the fiber

of how schools teach men
how to be men.

Parents, you know,
inculcate little boys

with how to be -- you know,
how to be little boys.

NAOMI: When you're a child
in most of India,

you're not allowed
to talk to a boy

until your parents
deem you fit to get married.

So don't talk to boys,

don't talk to boys,
don't talk to boys,

now fuck this one
and have babies.

-[ Laughs ]
-NAOMI: It's ridiculous.

And this is why, for a lot of --

Indian men don't know
what to do with relationships.

[ Soft music plays ]

We were married
about 62 years back.

Still I love him, very much.

We fight, but not much.

NIHARIKA:
The moment he came in my life,

happiness was like,
"Okay, come on."

[ Laughs ]

"Let's be happy together."

KULDEEP: I was getting old
and my mother said,

"Why don't you look for a girl?"

NIHARIKA: So I didn't know
how to use Tinder.

But the moment
I pressed the heart,

the pictures kept changing,

so I kept on clicking
on that heart again and again.

He said,
"Hello, beautiful smile."

I was like, "Oh-ho,
let me talk to this guy."

No, no, no.
Let me say something.

My sister wrote to me.
She suggested many boys.

But in the last line she wrote

this thing that there's a boy
from J&K.

Something clicked in me.
I thought, "This is the boy."

He came on his Bullet,
and I was like,

"Oh, my God, he has a Bullet!
Yay!"

ABHISHEK: A Bullet is a bike
which everyone likes,

in India especially.

She always wanted
to have a Bullet.

-I want one.
-[ Abhishek laughs ]

After that,
we were meeting every day.

Not even a single day
was missed.

HARSHI:
They sent me his picture.

He looked very...

What should I...
[ Speaks native language ]

-Mischievous.
-Mischievous.

I fell for that.

This is how our marriage was...

-Fixed up.
-Fixed up.

I sent her picture to my family.

And they were like,
"Is she gonna be your wife?"

And then he sent me
a screenshot,

and I was like,
"What is this going on?

I'm still not in love
with this guy.

He never asked me, nothing,

and he's planning
to get married to me?"

HARSHI: He said, "I'm sending
you a diamond ring."

It was a very small post office.

They said,
"We have received a parcel,

but there must be
two witnesses."

We didn't have any witness,
so what to do?

Suddenly it struck me
that I have his letter,

in which he had written "love."

This is the ring.

KULDEEP:
It cost me $10.

But till that time
we had not met.

In India, the arrangement is,
like, they check your family.

-Your background.
-What's your background.

I was telling my mom,
"He's not of our caste."

The first reaction,
"Which caste, then?"

I said, "Does it matter?"
She said, "Yes, it does."

The moment she said that,
I just said, "It's okay.

I don't want you to come
to the marriage,

and I'll have a happy life,
and then you will regret.

That's fine,"
and then I started crying,

because at that day I realized
I really love him.

Then my mom realized,
"Okay, everybody's happy.

Only I am the one
who is struggling with this,"

so she was like,
"Okay, get married."

I said I won't meet him
till we got married.

He came one day before
and I only saw his arm.

[ Laughs ]

I said, "He seems to be
a nice person."

[ Slow rock music plays ]

AMANPOUR:
This is the Kinky Collective,

a group dedicated
to a BDSM lifestyle.

They've asked us to maintain
their anonymity

because they don't feel safe

coming out of the shadows
just yet.

[ Woman singing
in native language ]

WOMAN: Busting myths to do with
BDSM is one of the main reasons

why the Kinky Collective exists.

[ Singing continues ]

MAN: We have so limited
knowledge about kink

that we think kink
is something violent.

WOMAN: In fact,
because it is consensual,

it can define
what cruelty is not.

MAN: The important word here
is "play."

I'm not really
suffocating someone,

not really trying
to kill someone.

WOMAN: It's about intensity,
connection, caring.

MAN: It is not about
surrendering to someone,

but it is about surrendering.

WOMAN: Being a dominant or a
submissive is about my pleasure.

The other person
can be absolutely anybody,

even a perfect stranger.

MAN: People don't judge
whether I have money or not,

my caste, my religion.

They don't give a damn.

Only they think about
that you are human,

you are into kink,
you are welcome.

WOMAN: I just let go,
not responsible for anything.

It's just the two of you.

Nothing else in the world
matters.

MAN: You give up control
to the divine.

At that moment,
my dominant is the divine.

[ Deep exhalation ]

[ Projector clicking ]

WOMAN:
This is a woman dominant,

and those are two
transgender people.

AMANPOUR: I've always assumed
BDSM is about pain and violence,

so the Collective invites me
to see some of their photos

to dispel my misconceptions
about kink.

[ Laughter ]

Should we be surprised that this
is happening in India?

I mean, it does have
a reputation

of everything but kink.

Mind you, it is the home
of the Kama Sutra.

MAN: Oh, yes, that's exactly
what I was about to say,

that if it's not in India,
where it shall be?

Because of the years
of British rule,

we have actually forgotten
our culture.

Even in mythological texts,

we find references
to an erotic activity.

Bite marks,
grabbing of the hair.

Even in the ancient
religious texts?

Oh, yes,
everything is happening.

And yet you are all
anonymous for us today.

MAN:
Yes, yes.

We want to be
out there in the open,

but society is not yet ready
to accept.

This is me.

That's you?

Ah, I wouldn't have said it.
You surprise me.

-Kink is about surprises.
-[ Laughs ]

MAN: This talks about
the gender fluidity.

In our existing society,

it's very difficult
to be yourself.

-This is my hand right there.
-This is your hand?

MAN: Yeah, that's how I find
my submission.

My wife was actually
practicing knots.

So your wife is into it?

MAN:
Yeah, she's right there.

AMANPOUR:
Great, all right.

So you've found
the perfect partner for this?

Explain the safe word.

Something is happening
that you're not okay with,

you use your safe word,
and you can get out,

and the scene immediately stops.

AMANPOUR:
Next one.

Aww.

[ Laughter ]

What is it,
before I get caught doing this?

A male chastity belt.

Oh.

[ Laughter ]

MAN:
Talks about the female dominant,

where the dominant not only
inflicts an amount of pain,

which is mutually consented to,
but also talks about power.

In India, there is a phrase
called "joru gagalam,"

which means
"slave to the woman."

-And that's what you wanted?
-MAN: Yeah.

I am raised up
in a very orthodox family

in a very small town,

and coming from
a patriarch family,

it was very difficult,

because, you know,
I have to be macho man.

This is a photograph

of a submissive
that I was playing with.

Having this desire
to kiss the feet of a woman.

Is that what a foot fetish is?

-MAN: Yeah.
-Ah.

MAN: It can be
just even worshiping.

Even a pedicure can also be
an act of submission.

It's going to make me think
very, very, very hard

-next time I go to get mine.
-[ Laughter ]

MAN: This is where I break
a spoon on somebody's ass.

So you hit somebody's butt.

MAN: Yes, many times,
and the spoon --

-Until the spoon breaks?
-MAN: Yeah.

It was consensual.

She enjoyed it.
I enjoyed it.

And actually, I don't remember
whether it's she or he.

It was you?
It was your wife?

And you don't remember
whether it was a he or she.

There is something
that I'm not computing here.

Would she be able to break
a spoon on your behind?

MAN:
Every day.

Every day.
[ Laughs ]

I need to talk to her.

WOMAN:
This is me and my husband.

-And you're Monty's wife?
-WOMAN: Uh, yeah.

I'm a switch, so I've gone
through different phases

wherein you feel submissive,
you feel dominant.

What if you and Monty

are feeling dominant
at the same time?

We go out and play
with other people.

-Do you have a happy marriage?
-I have a very happy marriage.

MAN: If there's one
most important thing to me

with regard to kink,
it is how we deal with consent.

Look at marriage.

Under Indian law, the husband,

even if he forces himself
upon the wife,

cannot be charged with rape.

Marital rape is not illegal
in India.

However, the kink scene
is looked as perversion.

The safe word
completely stops a scene

at whatever point it might be.

Unless you have the power
to withdraw consent,

it is not absolute consent.

[ Ethereal music plays ]

AMANPOUR:
For thousands of years,

India has recognized
the hijra community.

They may be born
biologically male,

but they see themselves
as female...

...or as a third
indefinable gender.

[ Man vocalizing ]

[ Woman vocalizing ]

[ Man vocalizing ]

[ Horns honking ]

[ Indistinct talking ]

AMANPOUR: Hijras are visible
on Delhi's streets.

-[ Speaks native language ]
-AMANPOUR: Begging for money

in return
for offering blessings.

They use superstition
to extract small handouts,

but prejudice against them
limits their access

to education,
employment, and housing.

Although India enshrined
the right to choose a gender

in 2014, hijras still
often live in poverty

and suffer sexual violence.

[ Speaks native language ]

Watch your steps here.
This is a difficult entrance.

AMANPOUR:
I mean, firstly, Abhina,

why are we going
through this broken area?

I mean, there must be an easier
way to get into the park.

Absolutely, and the reason why
is that in the night,

when it is pitch dark,

this park is transformed
into a sex work place.

So this is the entrance where
most of the clients

enter into the park.

Almost 80% transgender
are unemployed,

so majority of them
have to do sex work

to earn their resources,

and these kinds of parks
in the night

serve them as
a professional space.

A kind of brothel.
An outdoor brothel.

An outdoor brothel.

AMANPOUR: Abhina Aher
is a transgender activist,

and she's offered
to walk me through

the complexities of a community

that seems to be both protected
and discriminated against.

AHER: I've been part of the sex
work, to be honest with you.

I'm a software engineer, but
I was not getting jobs for --

AMANPOUR:
You're a software engineer?

So you went from
software engineer to sex work?

AHER: To sex work
and then social work.

That's the kind of work
that I engage in.

AMANPOUR: Let's go meet
some of your friends.

AHER: The hijras are dancers.
They are well-wishers.

AMANPOUR: Hi.

[ All singing
in native language ]

AHER: The authentic profession
of hijras is buddhi.

Means that whenever
there is a baby born,

marriage, or some sort
of happy occasion,

hijras will go,
they will play music,

they will dance
and give blessings.

Transgender is a big issue
around the world right now.

Obviously in the United States
and everywhere.

Yes.

What makes it so different here?

We always had three genders.

All hijra people
are considered to be divine

because they are in between,
neither male, neither female,

and when you go through
the castration process,

then you have no connections
with the world.

You become nirwaan.

Nirwaan is somebody that you
become more closer to the god.

So this has been
sort of enshrined

and part of society
for a long time?

AHER: Absolutely.
Hijras were prominent people.

The stature of hijras actually
came down under the Tribal Act.

AMANPOUR: Tribal Act,
when the British came?

When the British came,
because when the British came,

they saw a temple of hijras
for the first time.

For them, homosexuality
was a big no

when it comes
to the Christianity.

For us, the sex was
not something that is taboo.

This is one of the basic needs
of the body.

India's apparently
the only country which has

sexual activity carved
on the temple.

You know,
I have such a hard time

computing what you're saying.

You know, sexual activity
carved on a temple.

And yet today,
it's worse than Victorian.

Absolutely.

You definitely don't live
a divine earthly existence.

No, we don't.
We have two sides.

On this side, we are blessed.

On this side, we are cursed.

Somebody wants to touch
your feet to get a blessing,

and that's it.

You are isolated
from the society.

AMANPOUR:
You are college-educated.

You're a software engineer,

and you have to hide
in the bushes for clients?

Yes, absolutely, because
when I started transitioning

as a transgender person,

I faced a huge amount
of stigma in my workplace.

I had to leave that job,
and for three years,

I survived on sex work.

I remember I used to stand

on the railway tracks
to wait for a client,

and that was a very,
very difficult point for me.

Every day, when I used to go
for a sex work, Christiane,

I did not know
I would survive on that day.

-Wow.
-I felt that somebody

was really sitting on my ego
and pressing it so hard,

it almost felt like
I should commit suicide.

-Really?
-I-I tried to commit suicide

three times in my life.

Despite all the troubles
you've gone through,

are you in love?

Well, I am in a relationship.

To be honest with you,
Christiane,

finding love is a difficult
thing for a transgender person.

What matters is
the person next to you

is willing to accept you
the way you are,

give dignity, respect,

and treat you
as an equal partner.

Everybody has those
same desires and needs.

Exactly, exactly.
Love is love.

[ Slow music plays ]

[ Woman singing
in native language ]

AMANPOUR: My preconceptions
about relationships in India

involve notions of shame,
family expectations,

and fewer choices for women.

But this is hard to reconcile
with their history of eroticism.

Or even Bollywood.

So what happens
when this country is presented

with a Westernized Indian woman

who makes no apologies
for her past?

Sunny Leone was born in Canada,
raised in America,

and found fame here in India.

I like this.

We meet at her friend's
designer showroom for a fitting.

-That's beautiful.
-She was my first showstopper.

Really?
I didn't know that.

You are a major Bollywood star.

Yeah, I don't see myself
as "major" anything,

but it's been a nice journey
so far.

It's been a difficult journey.

When people think of India,
they think,

"Oh, it's going to be
so conservative."

I worked in the
adult-entertainment industry

for a really long time.

-As a porn star?
-LEONE: Yeah.

Breaking into this world,
it's virtually impossible.

Because of that?

Because I stood up
in front of the entire world,

and I said,
"Hi. My name's Sunny Leone,

and I'm a porn star
from the U.S."

I'm not ashamed of who I am.

I don't regret any decisions
that I've made in my life.

Accept me or don't accept me.

It doesn't --
It's not gonna bother me.

Given your past, what's
the reaction to you here?

When I first got here, it was,

"Oh, Sunny's doing
a bold scene,"

or, "Oh, my gosh,
she's wearing a bikini!"

But where it comes up
multiple times

is when either something
amazing happens.

You know, like I just adopted
a baby girl from India.

-Did you?
-And every headline is,

"Sunny Leone, porn star
to Bollywood actress

to now mother," right?

So how do you deal with it,
then?

Because you are very natural.

You're very yourself.
You're not embarrassed.

I just don't read the news.
[ Laughs ]

Are you trying to use
your visibility

to say something to young women?

I don't necessarily
think of myself

as someone that preaches
you should be a certain way.

I think it's more about making
your own choices in life.

The question that pops up
a lot is,

"How can, you know,
a young woman in India

be more confident,"
or, "How can she figure out

how to get the strength, maybe,
that you have,"

and I always say,
it's telling your husband,

"No, you're gonna
change the diaper today,"

or, "No, you're gonna
do the dishes today."

The idea of
an un-gender-biased home.

That's actually something
that I preach all the time.

That's the home
that I grew up in.

So that's definitely not
something that happens here?

No, but I do see a lot
of changes happening.

Films here -- That's the news.

They might not watch the news,

but they will definitely watch
a Bollywood film.

So the idea of bringing about
social change

through Bollywood actresses

may be a little bit
more effective sometimes.

You're taking part in
commercials for condoms, right?

Condoms and also
anti-smoking ads.

And you choose those
because of the social message?

When you come from the West
and you think of a condom,

it's not a big deal.

You're like, "Yeah,
of course you have to use one."

Here, it's not something
you talk about.

When Bollywood celebrities
or these types of people

start preaching these things,
then it becomes a norm.

Delhi is not the norm.

This is a very metropolitan,
very forward-thinking city.

Outside of Delhi,
the young people out there,

they want to see change, too,
and the only way to --

only way for change to happen
is if they see that it's okay.

Need to reduce it by 5 inches.

It's long, and then it's
a little loose on the waist.

AMANPOUR:
I want to try a sari.

I may be mutton dressed up
as lamb, but nonetheless.

[ Laughter ]

-That's a nice one.
-LEONE: Oh.

AMANPOUR: I've got a major
Bollywood star

and a major designer
putting me...

-In a sari.
-...in a sari.

MAYYUR:
Some serious draping.

Beautiful, though.
The color!

So now we make the pleats.

AMANPOUR: I don't know how
anybody's mother

gets dressed up in this
every day.

MAYYUR: Millions of women
every day in India,

and they even do yoga
and exercise.

-In this?
-In this.

My mom used to wear a sari

running around, cooking.

Is that what inspired you?
Your mum?

Yes, definitely.

Oh, my God.

LEONE:
Now try and walk.

[ Laughter ]

She's walking how I walk
when I wear a sari.

Can we put some jewelry on you?

AMANPOUR:
This is so opulent.

I do actually feel
like a maharani.

Aw, now, when you
do this [Sighs]

You have to look sultry and
virginal all at the same time.

[ Laughs ]

[ Laughs ]

See my face!

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

The people I've met
here in Delhi

represent a certain segment
of Indian society.

Even with the issues surrounding
women's safety in Delhi,

in many ways,
it's still years ahead

in terms of relationships

than more remote parts
of the country.

Caste, clan, religion,
and arranged marriage

are still the ties that bind
for those on the outskirts.

One man who knows this
all too well is Sanjoy Sachdev,

a journalist and founder
of the Love Commandos,

which has just one mission --
to protect the freedom to love.

Okay, what is a love commando?

We are attempting to save lives

of young boys and girls
who are in love.

Because they are threatened

with violence, with killing
in the name of so-called honor.

But usually the woman.

They kill both.

Government of India has signed

the International Declaration
of Human Rights.

Article 16, it says that we will
allow marriage by choice only.

But what is happening?

Marriage by arrangement.

Caste, sub-caste,
super sub-caste...

Brahmin is not allowed
to marry a Sikh.

Hindu is not allowed
to marry a Muslim.

What is this nonsense?

What we call dating
you don't have here.

The date goes to public places.

Fundamentalists and many times
police catches them,

beats them mercilessly.

Really?
You're not just exaggerating?

Even if they are
sitting together like this.

Just for putting their arm
around each other?

Yeah, they are beaten.

I had friends from Germany.

They live together first,
have children, marry later!

In this country, people
will kill them on the roads.

So what does that mean for
a couple's human connection?

That is what Love Commandos
is fighting for.

A couple comes to you.
They're terrified.

They may be on the wrong side
of the culture,

their faith, their parents.

What do you do for them?

All over the country, we have
450 plus makeshift shelters.

These makeshift shelters
are places of namaste.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

MAN: Love is
the most amazing feeling.

WOMAN:
Love is friendship.

AMANPOUR:
One young couple

at the Love Commandos'
Delhi shelter agrees to talk,

though for safety,
their identities are hidden.

MAN:
We have been married 3 months.

I used to go to my college
and her home is on the way.

Then I just could not
forget her.

Just thinking about her,
about her.

WOMAN:
I liked his face too.

We kept chatting on WhatsApp
and fell in love.

MAN:
We are from different castes.

But the main problem is

that we are from
the neighboring villages.

They think any girl and boy
from neighboring villages

are so-called brothers
and sisters.

That is why they're not
allowing us to marry.

WOMAN: I was scared that
my family might find out.

They might kill us.

MAN: We did not tell anyone,
just came here and got married.

We miss our families.

Every boy, every girl cannot
forget their family so easily.

They've tried to get in touch
with us, saying come home.

But if we go home,
there is no future of us.

How much people can you kill?

One day they will have to
accept love marriages.

SACHDEV: We believe that love
is this natural right.

Please give them.

Otherwise,
country is on a volcano.

Whenever youth
has been suppressed,

oppressed, depressed
and crushed,

there has been a blast

and they have snatched
whatever they wanted.

Has it made a difference,
your work?

Definitely.

The couples who have
been helped by us

now they are helping others.

HARSHI: He was the most nervous
bridegroom.

I tried...

to wink at him.

But he was just...

I took hold of his hand
and we became friends.

After our marriage, I sat
in the front on his bicycle

and we roamed about
in our city.

We became lovers...

in one day.

And now it's 62 years.

Marriage is give and take.

He makes tea for me.

He's a very good tea maker.

I like tea a lot,

so every morning,

he'll make tea for me
and then wake me up.

We will chitchat for a while.

Our conversations are endless.

She has a lot of stories
to tell.

And he's the one who listens.

[ Both laugh ]

We plan together.

We dream together.

I would suggest people, they
should go against their parents

and get married, really,

because if you feel you're
really happy with someone,

that person is going to
keep you happy all life long.

-HARSHI: I can kiss?
-KULDEEP: Yeah.

It's so easy.

Living together
for many more years

is an aspiration still,

but it's all in the hand
of God, eh?