Original subtitles

NARRATOR: Coming tonight on Hill Street Blues…

Operation Everglades requires an annual search of the sewers

for alligators by this department.

I have been receiving obscene phone calls!

Francis is slated for divisional commander.

If this street-killing's no big deal, why you, Emil?

Somebody must've liked her, recruited her off the Hill.

You think that's okay, Nemo? Fourteen-year-old girls?

-Sex club. -That's right.

With juvenile performers.

Can I go home with you tonight?

ESTERHAUS: Item 11

concerns a gang of alleged juveniles of varying sexes

displaying their private parts to vehicular traffic…

-(everyone laughing) -…on the Harding Expressway.

The alleged intent of which being to distract motorists into accidents.

We've had three to date.

So, what's say we button up the problem forthwith

and put some attention on those overpasses.

All right. Next item is item 12.

Be reminded that Operation Everglades

is under way as of 0700 this morning.

Those of you new to the Hill may or may not know

that the sanitation workers' contract with the city requires

an annual search of the sewers for alligators

by this department.

-(murmuring) -Said reptiles,

transported here in their infancy as souvenirs of Florida,

have been known to achieve eight feet in length…

-(whistles) -(laughing)

…and represent an alleged danger

-to sanitation workers. -(talking inaudibly)

It's a tough, thankless job down there,

-more difficult than people imagine. -(talking inaudibly)

So, let's be alert to that operation under the streets,

making sure that all storm drains and manhole covers

remain accessible.

Any questions?

All right. That's it. Let's roll.

Hey,

-let's be careful out there. -(chairs scraping)

(indistinct chatter)

Judas Priest, Frank. I will not have this operation compromised.

If you ask me, it is a carbon copy of last year's fun and games

with the S.P.C.A.

Carbon copy, and make no mistake, Frank.

Look, Howard,

why don't we try to see this from Mr. Bromfield's perspective?

It's Dewey, man.

Last year, he was accidentally darted and spent nine days…

-In a coma, man. -…unconscious.

(sighs)

We have been through this time and again, Frank.

The man literally threw himself into the field of fire,

screaming ecological gibberish.

What amazes me is that he's back,

that he hasn't been dismissed for mental incapacity.

-The dude's a maniac, man. He's twisted. -Mr. Bromfield feels that

if he carries the tranquilizer darts personally,

there's less chance of his being

accidentally darted on the way to your command post.

Well, then, where the hell is he?

I have nine crack emergency action squads

parked on their duffs here for going on three hours.

Uh, he'll be using the, uh,

-the entrance of the manhole… -I'm all right.

They should leave them be down there, man. They scarf up on the rats.

It's a natural balance, like.

FURILLO (over radio): Say, uh, 10, 15 minutes?

Yeah, I'm on my way, Captain.

Oh, say, within the half hour.

Well, get the tranquilizer down here, will ya?

Yeah.

Alligators.

See, people don't understand them, man. They're afraid of them.

-Let me ask you this. -(meows)

How many people you know of been hurt by alligators?

How many people been robbed?

Ever get any cookies come in here say they've been raped by alligators?

Hey, Dewey, what do you say?

Let's give those guys down there a break.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm on my way.

(meows)

Oh, uh, listen, if I don't come back,

-it's been nice knowing you, Henry. -Dewey.

The man does make a lot of sense.

Yeah.

Oh, Henry, uh,

let's see what, uh, we can do

about some unauthorized personnel, okay?

No problem.

I'll have him in a foster home in five minutes.

-Good, Henry. -(door opens, closes)

WOMAN (on radio): Dispatch. We have a 9-11.

-Armed robbery in progress. -(sirens whooping)

See Surplus Store, corner of People's Drive and 124th Street.

(theme music playing)

He's been here three times before.

I don't know what you're going to do, but you have to do something.

I don't either, because he won't listen--

Ray, I'm trying to understand exactly what transpired in roll call.

That homicide up on East Detroit, Phil.

Night watch was two hours into overtime.

Be that as it may, Ray. We are all part of a system up here,

and that system demands a certain protocol!

Uniforms deal with uniforms, plainclothes with plainclothes.

-When you invaded roll call-- -Bother you a minute, Phil?

-Hi, Ray. Hang on to him for five minutes. -What?

I swear I'll have him situated ten minutes at the most.

Ooh, ooh. Oh, Henry, please.

As I was saying, Lieutenant, when you invaded roll call just now,

that system of protocol sustained irrevocable damage.

That's a little strong, wouldn't you say?

Maybe you'd like to reword that a little.

ESTERHAUS: I don't see the need to reword what's been perfectly worded.

-Whoo. Yeah, you tell it to him, cat man. -(speaking foreign language)

-In the chops, man. -(speaking foreign language)

You wait till your father comes.

Excuse me a minute, lady. You keep your mouth shut.

You had to start this in front of them?

I suppose that's protocol.

Ray, it's not easy keeping that herd awake,

much less under control.

What you did seriously undercuts my authority.

I've seen you issue orders to plainclothes, Phil.

LaRue, Belker, Delgado, Washington.

-I won't deny that. -It's the nature of the beast up here.

Things sometimes happen too fast.

Enough said. I'm in the wrong. Discussion closed.

No, you don't. All that says is you're still mad about it.

I am not mad about it. Here, let me get you a cup of coffee.

Uh, that's okay. You got your hands full.

-No, I don't. -Uh--

Let me do it. I want to pour you a cup.

Thank you, Ray.

(family arguing)

Thank you.

-(shouting) -Hey, who… who cares? I don't care.

(both shouting in foreign language)

You are so smart. You're always doing it by yourself.

BOY: I don't care.

Part of the new family counseling program, Ray?

(arguing continues)

That homicide investigation wrapped up fast.

I didn't expect you back till noon.

Division has it. Emil Schneider, he's heading it.

Schneider? Sounds big.

Well, it must be to take Ray here off it.

We all know Ray's one of the best.

(upbeat music playing)

HILL: Okay, would you all back up against the wall?

Please, ma'am, come over to the side. Thank you.

-(Renko, indistinct) -Back up. Please, back up.

Cuidado, por favor. Cuidado, por favor. Gracias.

-MAN: What else? -Two of the fingernails on her right hand,

the forefinger and the middle finger, were broken.

They're false nails, not real fingernails.

Good.

-What else? -Marks on her wrists

and three of her fingers indicate she was wearing jewelry.

I'd say, what with the hairdo, the big-ticket clothes,

she was one good-looking woman, Lieutenant.

Call girl, maybe. Maybe worked the hotels.

Don't be in too much of a rush, huh, kid?

WOMAN: Sí. Sí, no hay problema.

Your protégés here crack it yet, Emil?

Dann's got her connected back to working call girl

at the Savoy Ritz Hotel.

Thinks she got done in by…

what would you say, Dann, secret agents?

Yeah, Bulgarians, Lieutenant.

It's all yours, Emil. We're done.

Uh, make some room here.

These people, I swear. I had a victim two days ago

got terminated over a bottle of grape juice.

-Learn them good, Emil. See ya. -Mm-hmm.

WOMAN: Ven aquí. No hay problema.

Don't worry about it. It's fun fur.

Uh, Lieutenant, I think you're mistaken there.

Something on your mind, Officer?

No, no. It's just that that's a genuine fox collar.

And that's a cashmere sweater.

-Is that a fact? -Yeah. As a matter of fact,

I got my mama one last Christmas.

-You were with me, Bobby. Remember? -Where?

She says it's hers.

She says she loaned it to the victim,

and she's afraid she's not gonna get it back.

It's okay. It's not important. Stay with her a couple of hours, huh?

-(indistinct chatter) -I don't remember.

Hill Street blues.

Say hello to Furillo for me, huh?

Yes, sir.

Fur expert. "Murray the Furrier."

-"Murray the Furrier," that's you. -What you talking about?

-I don't even know what he means. -You're butting in his business again.

-Why don't you just be quiet one time? -So are you.

MAN 1: You men want to check your flashlights?

MAN 2: I just checked. Mine's good.

Got a couple of prune Danish here, Lieutenant.

Apricot, cherry. Looks like chocolate.

Ahh. (puffs)

Good enterprise, Devlin.

You know, the dampness down here is known to sap calories.

That whole section of Von Steuben Avenue

above the projects is Sniper Alley.

The gas company ought to know better than to go up there

without a police escort.

Hey, we don't go up there ourselves unless we have to.

And even then, we dispatch three or four units at a time.

WOMAN: Hill Street Station.

I got your report, Supervisor.

It is being matriculated

to the proper functionaries of this agency.

Gas company casually dispatches a repair truck to Sniper Alley.

Got riddled with rifle fire.

Here, Ray.

It's carrot cake. Cream cheese frosting.

I can't. Look.

It's a little piece.

(sighs)

Thanks.

Uh, makes a wicked carrot cake, my Cindy. The frosting's mine.

We baked it dressed in our bathing suits.

(laughing)

Moist. Very moist.

Do you gentlemen have some reason for not being out on the streets

providing service to the public?

Well, we put out an A.P.B. on the tenant of record,

this here Nemo Rodriguez character,

the suspected boyfriend of the victim.

Uh, her name is Maria Cuajarda, or Maria Escala Sofias,

uh… uh, whatever you want to believe from her I.D.

One says she's 21. One says she's 18.

The boyfriend's gone, I take it.

He's a probie. Long record back when he was with the gangs.

-The Dragons. -The Dragons, I think.

Look, Lieutenant Schneider

says the kid shot her, ripped off her jewelry and split.

-So, what's got your nose so out of joint? -You should have seen her, Captain.

She was real, real good looking.

She had a beautiful face, hair, eyes, body, makeup, uh--

There's no way some 10-cent probie

is gonna keep a woman like that in a tenement.

How does the victim's aunt tie into all this?

-Well, this Nemo-- -The aunt-- The aunt was…

This Nemo Rodriguez was splitting the rent with her, I guess.

Who knows what else?

She said she took a sleeping pill

-about 9:00. -9:00.

Uh, ex-- excuse me, Captain. She sleeps in the front room.

She woke up at 5:00 in the morning

and found the body lying on the kitchen floor.

You're not nearly as bothered by this as he is.

You want to ride this one, Cowboy?

Well, uh, when I was in the apartment,

I made a mention to the lieutenant of a-- of a--

What "Murray the Furrier" is refusing to say, Captain,

-is that he got his wrist slapped. -I did not.

Now, look, here he is, this big lieutenant,

walking around, showing off to all these big college boys

who are gonna be detectives someday.

Instead of using the brains God gave 'em, they're looking down their noses

at me and Bobby, who maybe is used to it, but I'm not.

What are you talking about? You don't know what I'm used to.

You want to be a Homicide cop? Do it.

-But you don't tell me what I'm used to-- -I'm not--

-You don't know anything about it. -I'm not--

-You just said it. -I made a mistake.

Wait a minute. Hold it.

L-Let me see if I understand what you're telling me here.

Uh, you aspire to being a Homicide detective,

-and you don't. -Right.

And you,

more so than you,

have the feeling that Detective Lieutenant Schneider

is just waltzing his way through a homicide investigation.

Is that right?

(sighs)

I just won't have people saying I'm stupid 'cause I wear a uniform.

I'm not stupid.

Hill?

I got no problems.

Just seems kinda strange that, uh,

if this is your basic homicide/robbery

that a heavyweight like Schneider would be running the case.

Thanks for your input.

(upbeat music playing)

Hello.

Yeah.

(whistles) Mmm, it' a lot bigger than I remember.

Yeah.

Hey, the wheels look like they might need oiling, babe.

-Here, check the wheels. (coughing) -All right.

Mmm.

(clears throat)

-Wheels check. -(sighs)

Hey, I just realized something. It's a female.

Which means what? You wanna take her to dinner?

Cruel words, my man. What are you trying to do, break my spirit?

-Come on. Let's get it out of here. -Right.

The liquor license comes with the premises, man,

and the dude wants out.

He's asking 15 grand, but I know he'll take ten.

-What do you know about running a bar? -I know enough.

You know how to drink is what you know.

Come on, man. Are you gonna stand there and tell me

that between the two of us we don't have the smarts to run a bar,

let alone a laundromat?

(panting): Get serious, will ya? It's a guaranteed winner.

We'll have franchises in 200 cities.

I see it all now.

"Saloondromat:

the ultimate in singles laundromat and cocktail lounge."

Fluff and fold wallbangers. Jesus.

(engine starts)

LARUE: 10K for remodeling and we're in business for 20 grand.

-(Washington whistles) -Less than four weeks' gross,

according to one's figures here.

Those figures say anything about where one comes up with $20,000, huh?

One happens to already be into me for 3,200 now, you know.

We're even.

One's giving you three and 2/10ths shares in the company.

Oh, wow. Lucky me.

(indistinct chatter)

(clears throat)

We got a special Mayday line we're hooking up.

We're gonna have a red phone in the captain's office,

and then a red phone at the front desk.

Any problems? You look concerned, Officer.

(chuckling)

Everything is just fine, Commander.

Everything is just fine, Commander.

Good.

You know, you look good, Phil. Been working out, I'll bet.

Well, I have.

You have to have that celery sticking outta your face?

-It's unsightly. -This is roughage.

The doctor says I need roughage.

Last week he says protein.

I don't think he knows what the hell is the matter.

Mmm, you been staying regular?

Yeah. Every two weeks. Like clockwork.

I gotta admit, you don't really look good.

How about giving my guy a call?

He's outstanding. Enormously thorough man.

All right. I'll try it.

He's in the Bockner building. Sterling Wu, Internal Medicine.

He's an Oriental gentleman.

Wait a minute. He's not the one I heard about, is he?

Guy who puts leeches all over ya?

Do I look like the kind of guy who would permit leeches on his body?

The fellow they sent over from the S.P.C.A.

-hasn't hooked up with Hunter yet. -Hmm. Let's hope he's not lost down there.

Well, he's carrying the tranquilizing dart.

No dart, no operation.

Hunter is not exactly in a congenial frame of mind.

Score one for the alligators. I'm on their side.

Here. Thought I'd deliver this in person.

-You wanna crow a little? -(chuckles)

Flap your wings? Go ahead.

You'd make a hell of a good commander, Frank,

and I want you with me up at Division.

Oh, that means you're going up to deputy chief. Congratulations.

-Not that it surprises anyone. -Surprised me.

-Yeah, like hell. -You're up against a good guy, Frank.

Ed Chapel.

I know Ed. He's-- He is good.

You outscored him by a couple of points. You've got the edge in seniority.

But let's face it, Ed's a political guy.

He likes people, and people like him.

-He's active. He gets around. -(Hunter on phone, indistinct)

Uh, excuse me. Uh…

All right. I… I think you're jumping to conclusions, Howard.

It is a deliberate ruse to abort this operation,

and I will not be played a fool, Frank.

-I have nine squads. -(men chattering indistinctly)

We've been searching for him for two bloody hours,

and I don't need you to tell me when to execute a search.

Suppose you wait for Mr. Bromfield until midday,

and then cancel the operation until, say, uh,

07:00 tomorrow morning?

I'll take full responsibility.

HUNTER: Okay. But let the record show, I'm miffed.

I know how you feel, Howard. I don't blame you a bit.

Sure.

-(receiver clatters) -Uh.

Henry.

Will someone get me Henry Goldblume, please?

Everyone knows how effective you are with the nuts and bolts, Frank.

-(meows) -But that in itself won't cut it.

You've got to get active in the Police League.

Check in at Chief Daniels's breakfast sessions.

Lift one with the boys down at Madigan's once in a while.

You're under the microscope, Frank, from now to the day.

Pardon the untimely intrusion, Commander, but I thought the captain

would like to know that, uh, River Patrol picked up Nemo Rodriguez,

the suspect in the East Detroit Street homicide.

I've got Hill and Renko bringing him in.

Good, Phil. You want to see me, Ches?

Excuse me, Commander.

Captain, we've got a positive R & I on that victim.

The I.D.'s in her wallet were all phonies.

Her aunt confirms she was Rosario Rivas, age 15.

Rapetto in Vice had her working the Heads and Tails Club about a year ago.

-Onstage. -At the ripe old age of 14.

-Who's on it, Frank? -Emil Schneider.

-Good. -(Fay shouting)

FAY: He knows where I work! He knows where I live!

He knows what I eat!

He knows absolutely everything,

including the name of your son's orthodontist,

including the color of my lingerie!

And he is filthy, foul, filthy, stinking--

Fay, you remember Divisional Commander Swanson.

-Hello, Fay. -Don't hello me, Swanson.

Do something! Anything!

Uh, I'm sorry. Fay seems to be a little upset.

(scoffs): Upset? Me?

Very perceptive, Frank. Highly perceptive.

As I recall, one of the highlights of our marriage was your keen perception.

-I'll catch up with you later, Frank. -Oh, no, you don't, mister.

This concerns you, too.

I called my local precinct last night for help.

And what did I get? A tape recording of Mantovani!

That filth could have broken in and butchered me and your son

while the police played Mantovani.

Fay, what is your problem?

I have been receiving obscene phone calls

from yesterday afternoon at 4:00 till 4:00 this morning.

And I am drained, Frank.

I'm at the end of my rope!

(crying)

It's okay to cry.

I know how upsetting these kinds of calls can be.

I don't want to cry. I just want it to stop!

My God, what kind of a world is this

when your own telephone in your own bedroom

becomes some sort of horrible weapon

for some perverted mind who's just free as you please,

and the police don't care?

-That's not true, Fay. -Uh, what precinct is she in, Frank?

-Midtown. -I'll take care of it.

See you out and around?

Yeah. Thanks, Dave.

Uh, look, it's okay.

I mean, uh, it's-- it's gonna be all right.

(sighs)

Started happening, Ray.

I've been seeing it coming for ten months now.

Francis is slated for divisional commander.

We're gonna lose him. I just saw the letter.

BATES: Take a seat, Mrs. Furillo.

-It's not for publication. -You absolutely sure?

Sure as I am that this department's long overdue

for its first Hispanic precinct captain.

How do you suppose he knew that?

I mean, do you mark it on a calendar, or…?

-No. -How we doing, Fay? Feeling better?

-(sighs) -Huh?

Yeah. I am now.

You know, just knowing somebody cares helps.

At 4:00 in the morning, with, uh, no husband, it's…

Well, I think you both know what I'm talking about.

You know, Fay, as traumatic as these calls are,

I wouldn't worry about the caller doing what he threatens doing.

-It's true. -They're sick, lonely, cowardly types.

They can't do anything but dial a phone.

I know.

Of course, there was the Clausen case not long ago.

What's the Clausen case?

Sergeant.

Oh, you don't want to know, Fay.

I'm sorry.

She did live though. He was put away.

(chuckles): It's nice seeing you, Fay.

I'm sure you've got nothing to worry about.

(indistinct station chatter)

Right in there.

-Booking. -FURILLO: Have him Mirandized,

and in both English and Spanish.

And take him into interrogation

and don't let anybody talk to him till Schneider gets there.

-How about his phone call? -Absolutely.

-Frank? -Yeah.

What's the Heads and Tails Club?

Private club. Top of the Fairmont Manor.

-Sex club. -That's right.

-With juvenile performers. -Yes, some.

Vice has tried closing it down for years, Henry,

but it's got an, uh, influential membership.

Besides, it's Midtown's problem.

It's a 14-year-old girl.

Seems to me that's everybody's problem.

I can't be--

How can this department know about it and not do anything?

And don't tell me it's victimless. We know better than that.

I'm sorry. I--

I just can't seem to get it off my mind.

Me neither, Henry.

(door opens)

-(typing) -RENKO: Yeah, okay.

No, the only thing I called Division about was about the address.

-We don't know the address. -(sighs)

(sighs): He left the book. I know.

It's the yellow copy.

RENKO: Robert Hill. It should be in the files turned in.

It was turned in.

Yeah, I'm well aware of that. Thank you.

I'll hold.

(indistinct radio chatter)

Good work. Uh, now cage him and get him out of here.

-MAN: Hold him steady. -Do we tie him up first

or just put him in the cage?

-Keep track of where we are now. -Keep our hands out of the cage.

There should be more. Where there's one, there's more.

Oh, if I were writing my memoirs, Snellkirk,

I would entitle this little episode, Prelude to Oblivion.

Ah, it's just another symptom of this city's deteriorating nervous system.

What galls me

is that

there's still time enough to save it.

That's disgusting.

(accordion music playing)

(music continues)

-WOMAN: I'll be right back. -(indistinct chatter)

You know how many calories are in those French fries?

-Oh, thank you, honey. -MAN 1: Need another beer?

-MAN 2: Yeah. -After 25 years of these things,

I don't know whether I'm eating them or they're eating me.

Remember when these things used to be 35 cents?

MAN: Light or dark?

Club soda, please.

Frank Furillo.

-How ya doing, Frank? -I'm doing just fine, Emil.

You look good.

Your East Detroit Street suspect, Rodriguez, was picked up by River Patrol.

-We're holding him for you. -Hey, that's fast work.

Do I have time to finish this?

Maybe you better skip the buns.

Ah, the bun is the best part, Frank.

What's the chance your just booking and shipping him, huh?

-Save me the schlep up there? -No chance.

(music continues)

Excuse me.

-WOMAN: Can I have, uh-- -What's the problem, Frank? Jurisdiction?

I step in somebody's rice bowl this morning?

Explain something to me, Emil.

If this street killing's no big deal, why you?

Taking some kids to school, that's all.

They got to learn someplace.

Those two kids you sent over,

the chunky kid was nursing a wild hair of some kind.

Started giving me a hard time about the victim's sweater. (chuckles)

Ah, well, they're kids.

They're ambitious. Can't blame them.

-How's the missus? -That's history.

You, too?

(clicks tongue)

Everyone in this place is either divorced, separated, or fighting a holding action.

You figure it.

Rapetto over at Vice says the victim

was working half-and-half at the Heads and Tails Club.

-Do you know about that? -No. It explains a lot though. The money.

Must've been a thousand bucks on her back.

Hey, Frank. Good to see ya.

-Hi, Ed. How ya doing? -Good, good. Okay.

-How are you, Emil? -Ed.

So, how's the world, huh? How's Fay?

SCHNEIDER: Divorced.

Well, join the club, Frank.

Rita packed me off 18 months ago.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Well, there's no sense our skirting the issue, Frank.

-Looks like it's you and me. -Mm-hmm.

-I got the word this morning. -Yeah, me, too.

Well, I don't know how you feel about it.

Me, I'm kind of, uh, walking the fence, you know.

A commander's a commander, but, uh…

I'm a street cop, you know?

Oh, yeah. I know what you mean.

Well, good luck.

-I mean it. -Same here, Ed.

I mean it, too.

I'll see you guys, huh? Take care.

Hungry life, Frank.

I thank my lucky stars I'm getting out.

How about doing us a favor, huh?

Just shipping the kid downtown. Save me the trip.

How about doing me a favor and giving me a reason?

No reason.

When Division tells me to roll, I just roll.

-What's the problem? -It's nothing personal, Emil.

But I wanna be there when you interrogate the kid.

Okay?

-(car horn honks) -(church bells chime)

A year we've been on this, huh?

A full year, and nobody thought to measure nothing.

How could we screw up like this?

WASHINGTON: Maybe we could cut off her legs.

-That's criminal, man. -Uh-huh.

I say we get ourselves to a hardware store,

do it and get it done, babe.

-Cut off her legs? -Mm-hmm.

Now level with me, Charlie, please.

How much of it is test scores?

I mean percentage.

Uh, 50-50? 60-40? What?

Don't play games with me, Charlie, please.

Everyone knows Frank is moving up to Division,

so the captaincy's open.

Hey, look, I'll get back to you later.

Frank, no Schneider.

He'll be there.

Oh, uh, do something for me, will you, Ray?

Call Dave Rapetto over at Vice

and see if you can get his paperwork on the Heads and Tails Club.

Employees, clientele, like that.

Ask him if he'll keep it off the records.

Send Hill and Renko to pick it up in person.

What are we looking for?

I don't know yet. Maybe nothing.

Maybe satisfy myself Schneider's covering the same bases.

Phil, I would like to request the services of Officers Hill and Renko.

Oh, your request is granted, Ray.

I'll radio them to be at your disposal immediately.

You mind telling me what's going on here?

-Protocol, Francis. -Oh.

Oh, by the by, Francis, uh, you know Mr. Bromfield, the S.P.C.A. man?

He had a small misfortune while in traffic.

Traffic?

He's supposed to be in the sewer. What happened to him?

Oh, he's alive. He's all right.

While stopped at a traffic light, he somehow accidentally

scratched himself with a tranquilizer dart.

County Detox has got him. They say he's sleeping like a baby.

You by any chance pass this along to Hunter?

Oh, negative, Francis.

It didn't seem quite like the proper protocol.

-Okay. -WASHINGTON: All right, babe.

Here it comes. Here it comes. Easy. Easy. Boy, this sucker's heavy.

-I got it. -Yeah.

-Okay, here it goes. -Okay.

Grab it.

Ahh.

-Here's the bag, man. Grab it. -Okay.

-You got it? You got it? -Yeah.

(coughing)

Oh, man. (sighs)

-Okay, let's do it. -Hey, man, it's dark enough. Why bother?

Hey, man, we paid the dude for a four-legged alligator.

-You want your money's worth or what? -(jeering)

All right, lover. Let's tape them back on.

MAN: Say, brother. Say, you, down there in the hole!

Drama of the Jungle. You. Yeah. What's up?

Police business. Vacate the scene, please.

(jeering continues)

Hey, I said it was police business, so move it out of there. Move.

-(laughing) -MAN: All right. All right.

-"Vacate the scene, please." (laughing) -These people, I swear.

-Give me some tape. -Yeah, here.

I wouldn't call my mood demoralized, Frank, but, uh, let's be candid.

It does tax one's proclivity to cope.

Oh, yeah, Howard. It can renew one's lack of faith.

Which brings one, parenthetically, to the heart of the matter, Frank.

You're up for commander.

MAN (over radio): Base camp, come in. This is Munson.

-Urgent. -Uh, wait a minute.

Base camp. Come in, Lieutenant. This is Munson. Urgent.

-This is Hunter. -Sighted alligator, moving fast.

-Designate position. Over. -Corridor "L."

-(gunfire) -(screams)

(laughing)

(gunfire continues)

(sniggering)

WOMAN: Oh-ho.

(indistinct chatter)

This is just one more example of the rampant unprofessionalism

that is legend in this precinct.

Frank, Judas!

My boys shouldn't have to put up with this.

Not with a gaggle of prankster apes

who have Silly Putty for brains and jelly where their manhood oughta be.

Howard, the whole thing is unfortunate, and it will be investigated.

I assure you.

If you're here that long.

I'll be around.

Ed Chapel's up against me, and in my opinion,

if anybody's interested, he's much better suited for the job.

Excuse me, Frank.

Uh… (coughs)

Lieutenant Schneider's here, and so's Rodriguez's public defender.

Hello, Howard.

Should go nicely with the moose heads.

Thank you, Henry. Tell them I'll be with them in a minute.

Let's put our bacon on the table, Frank.

When it comes to discipline, you're…

Oh, let's face it. You-- You're just too damned elastic.

Too damn forgiving.

Your focus is ideas, strategies, uh, command decisions.

Division needs you. And this place needs an iron hand.

-Look, Howard-- -No, listen, I know you're gonna tell me

that this conversation is premature, but I don't think so. No, I don't.

Not that I'm saying I'm above being occasionally premature.

(chuckles)

-(grunting) -Renko, hey, would you just listen to me?

Just kick a little bit lower, and don't worry about so much force.

-Just use some finesse, man. -Don't talk to me about finesse.

I am finesse.

(grunts)

It's basic career growth, the way I look at it.

Now, you… you may make sergeant someday in the future.

Appreciate your confidence in me, Renko.

Uh, me, I will pass my exams,

become a plainclothesman,

get into Homicide, become a Homicide unit--

Homicide will only take, uh, college graduates.

Well, that's why I'm going back to college next semester.

All right.

Every man has a destiny, the way I look at it.

Mm-hmm.

Some just go rising up that big ladder of success.

Maybe some people slide off to the side like this--

-Or maybe some don't. -Right.

You take Furillo, for instance.

Now, from what I hear, he's gonna be made captain.

Which means one of those lieutenants, Mulenburg or Hunter or "Calletaino"--

-"Calletano." -Calletano, however you pronounce it.

One of those guys is gonna be put into Frank's slot.

-Mm-hmm. -My point is, everything changes.

Nothing remains the same.

Except for those people who wish to just look

from paycheck to paycheck to paycheck.

-Meaning me, I suppose? -No, no. I didn't mention any names.

-Well, that's what you were implying. -I did not mention a name.

You didn't say my name. But you implied it though.

I implied nothing. What I'm trying to say is--

-What are you trying to say? What? -(Renko, indistinct)

(meows)

Why'd you need a screwdriver at 4:00 in the morning?

He was repairing the antenna on his television set.

(scoffs): He's already answered that.

Building superintendent says that basement door's

kept locked to keep the junkies out.

It was locked when we investigated the premises this morning.

I haven't had a good chance to really study the arrest report,

so I think it would be in our best interest not to answer

any further questions at this time.

I didn't do anything to her.

I didn't see her or nothing, man. I just…

I came upstairs, and-- and…

and she was lying there.

Must've been quite a shock coming on her like that.

You and her

maybe spent time together?

I know how it is, kid. It's… It's rough, tears you apart.

Things go spinning around inside your head at a time like that.

Maybe you took a piece of jewelry off her that you'd given her some time before.

For memory's sake.

-Is that possible? -No, I did not do anything like that!

I think we'd better cut this off right now.

Lieutenant. Captain.

Absolutely.

FURILLO: I wonder if we could shed some light

on the victim without compromising your client.

You don't have to answer.

She worked at the Heads and Tails Club a little over a year ago.

We know that, Nemo. We also know she was 14 then.

Somebody must've liked her-- recruited her off the Hill.

Who was that, Nemo?

Do you think that's okay, Nemo? Fourteen-year-old girls?

Man, she didn't ask me.

She didn't tell me nothing. She just went, all right?

-Her aunt couldn't stop her? -Her? Man, she don't care.

She came back.

Why do you suppose she came back, Nemo?

To see you or to see her aunt?

Okay.

The deputies will be taking you downtown soon.

Use the room here, why don't you, Counselor.

Thank you, Captain.

Word of friendly advice, Frank. Drive in your own lane, huh?

You'll get where you're going a hell of a lot faster.

Maybe so.

Come on, Frank.

We've known each other for 15 years.

You don't need that stuff to make the jump.

Homicide's my problem. Heads and Tails belongs to Vice.

Let's not go stepping over each other just for nothing.

-You think he's your boy? -Yeah.

I wouldn't lick the stamp till forensics came in, but, yeah.

I think your public is awaiting you.

Take care of yourself, huh?

How are you, Rabbi?

Yeah. Well, there's always the possibility.

It could go either way, Mick.

Well, my guess is no one's half as good as you are, Captain,

so congratulations and best of luck.

I think it's great. Sensational.

Thank you, Mick.

Um, every man's got his own destiny, Captain,

and you shouldn't worry about what gets left behind.

I mean, what happens to us people up on the Hill.

You just gotta erase that.

It's like ships that passed in the night

and sailed away alone across lonely seas.

-You know. -Uh--

Eh-- Uh-- Wait.

-(growling) -Wait. No, no. Hold it, Mick.

It's okay. All right. Just a second. Oh!

It's already had a rough day. I appreciate the good wishes, Mick.

I just wanted you to know that you shouldn't worry about us.

We're gonna do just fine.

(sighs)

Yes, Francis, I think you owe the men a formal announcement

of the possibilities,

morale-wise, candor-wise, and otherwise.

You're right, Phil. I'll do that.

I called Forensics.

Uh, the Rodriguez kid's prints are all over the murder weapon.

Well, as Schneider says, I guess that licks the stamp.

-Oh, Phil, uh… -Mm-hmm.

…could you do something about this?

-(chuckling): I think so. -(cat meows)

Uh…

And…

could you ask Henry to please do something about that?

-All right. All right. -Thanks, Phil.

-Good night. -Good night.

(thunder rumbling)

Division's such a political snake pit.

I don't know if I'm equipped for that.

You're equipped for it.

It would mean more bucks.

Many more bucks.

And more time for the better things in life, namely, moi.

Hmm.

You want to sell me a little?

Homework, Furillo.

Do I detect political action in this bedroom, Counselor?

You detect no action in this bedroom.

But since you brought it up, you may as well know my opinion,

which is that politics is everywhere, and you may as well get good at it.

Not that you're not, because you are.

As I recall, you politicked me into the sack

the first day you met me.

(laughing)

How'd you do that anyway? You drug me, Furillo?

-Mmm. -(pager beeping)

(sighs)

Nothing is moving me out of this bedroom tonight, Counselor.

So, just put those books away. I'll be right back.

(sighs)

-When is this gonna stop? -Midtown is handling it, Fay.

They know what they're doing, and I want you to cooperate with them.

If you heard the things he threatened on the phone…

Very graphic.

He's making me physically ill, Frank.

You know what he said?

He said that he's smarter than the police.

He's not. We'll get him.

-Guaranteed? -Guaranteed.

(sighs)

How long can Frank Jr. stay with your mother?

Till Monday.

She's going to the hot springs. I can't ask her to cancel.

I'm not asking you to ask her.

Can I go home with you tonight?

Please, Frank? I can't go back there.

You could call her on the phone and warn her that I'm coming.

Don't worry about it. Let's go.

It's not gonna bother me if there's somebody there.

It could bother her, but it's not gonna faze me one bit.

-That's good to know. -Then there is someone there.

Not that it's any big deal if there is.

(theme music playing)