Original subtitles

♪ Daring duck of mystery

♪ Champion of right

♪ Swoops out of the shadows

♪ Darkwing owns the night

♪ Somewhere some villain schemes

♪ But his number's up

♪ 3-2-1

♪ Darkwing Duck

♪ When there's trouble, you call DW

♪ Darkwing Duck

Let's get dangerous.

♪ Darkwing Duck

Darkwing... duck!

♪ Cloud of smoke and he appears

♪ A master of surprise

♪ Who's that cunning mind behind

♪ That shadowy disguise?

♪ Nobody knows for sure

♪ Bad guys are out of luck

♪ 'Cause here comes

♪ Darkwing Duck Look out!

♪ When there's trouble, you call DW

♪ Darkwing Duck

Let's get dangerous.

♪ Darkwing Duck

Better watch out, you bad boys!

♪ Darkwing Duck ♪

As a cleverly concocted crime wave crashes over St. Canard,

a drowning police force calls Darkwing Duck

to turn the tide.

And so, armed with an awesome array

of crime-fighting gizmos and - and thingamabobs,

our hero is sure to sift out

even the slightest shred of evidence.

Aha! Fingerprints.

A perfect match.

You might as well confess.

Your fingerprints are all over this place.

B-But I'm the bank's president.

Of course. I knew that.

Well, that's just great.

Whoever took the money didn't leave a single clue behind.

Clue? They didn't even leave the safe behind.

Just like all the other robberies.

It's like the vault just got up and walked away.

What did you say? Well, that's stupid.

Come on, Launchpad. There's nothing more here.

We'd better check on the armored car shipment.

(groans, coughs)

With all the robberies goin' on in town,

money just isn't safe in safes anymore...

...which is why old Herb Muddlefoot

is keepin' his money where no crook will ever look.

♪ Rock-a-bye, baby, in the treetop... ♪

(sings in foreign language)

Oh, I don't remember my daisies here.

The poor dears look parched.

(splutters)

Herb! Hiya, honeybunch.

Whatcha doin' out?

Singing my plants to sleep. They just love soft music.

Uh, what are you doing, dear?

Well, I was just enriching the soil.

Trying to get those darned azaleas to grow, you know.

Oh, good.

You should try some of that Mr. Mulch fertilizer.

It's supposed to make anything grow.

Boy, wouldn't that be nice?

But money doesn't grow on trees.

(ka-chings)

(grunting)

Oh, we'll never get rich at a penny a weed.

Especially after we pay back my mom

for all the plants you ruined.

Well, this gardening stuff isn't easy.

Those weeds look like flowers, those flowers look like weeds,

and these flowers look like dollar bills.

Honker, scope this out.

(ka-ching) Wow.

Do you think it's real?

Real enough for me. It's our very own money tree!

Shh. We gotta keep this a secret.

Come on, let's put it someplace safe.

(grunts)

There. Now we can just sit back

and watch our money grow.

What do you think, Honk man?

I say it's harvest time.

(snickers) Sounds good to me.

Yes!

Boy, this sure beats living on my allowance.

Getting a raise out of Dad takes forever.

Gee, DW, it's takin' forever to catch this crook.

That's why we're gonna set a trap.

I'm willing to risk a considerable amount of my own money,

which I have right here in my... safe.

Looks like they took the bait, all right.

Yeah, the whole 20 bucks.

You were gonna bait the trap with 20 bucks?

Well, that and the family jewels.

And they just don't make rhinestones like that anymore.

OK, OK. We'll buy an electron microscope tomorrow,

but only because the record store ran out of CDs.

(Darkwing) Gosalyn!

Where'd you get all this stuff?

And more importantly, how did you pay for it?

Uh... won the lottery?

Don't try to fool me. I'm not a normal father, you know.

Well, call the papers.

Fine, be a hard case,

but a chain is only as strong as its weakest link,

isn't that right, Honker?

(stammers)

Whoa! Uh, uh -

I-I - Oof!

OK, that's it. That's final.

I don't care where you got the money,

but these things are going back right now.

But that's not fair. We paid for it.

How?!

Well...

All right, I'll tell ya.

H-He seems so different.

Do you think there's something wrong with him?

Nothing an exorcism won't fix.

(evil laughter)

1, 3, 5, 9, what I've got is mighty fine.

Yay, money!

I'll take that.

Hey, that's ours.

You're much too young to manage all this money. That's what parents are for.

But, Dad - No need to thank me.

Just run along. I'll take care of everything.

(Gosalyn) Hey!

(evil laugh) Now, let's get serious.

First a bit of fertilizer

to make our assets grow.

Plenty of light to brighten our future.

Don't you think you're overdoin' it a bit there?

Nah. Just makin' sure business keeps blooming.

I guess we better find someplace safe to stash all this.

Ow!

Well, of course, of course.

This will all go into a savings account.

Just as soon as I pick up a few odds and ends.

(♪ horn plays "Dixie")

Did you order a pizza?

Gee, I wonder how much of this is for me.

Got a treat for you right here, Gos.

Whoa-ho. Pretty impressive duds there, DW.

Well, one does have to keep up with trends.

It's one of the burdens of my lifestyle.

A key ring?

It's a genuine Gucci-Goo.

It's the absolute trendiest.

I'm underwhelmed.

Yeah, yeah, yeah,

it's all part of the lifestyle

of the new Drake Mallard.

Well, Mr. Trendo,

are you dumping the old Darkwing Duck, too?

Gosalyn, perish the thought.

The city has never been safer.

(both) Yes, sir.

Scurry on out and scour the streets of crime, won't you?

(both) Yes, sir.

Darkwing Defenders, Incorporated.

A security franchise available in most metropolitan areas.

(doorbell chimes)

Oh, another delivery.

From now on, every day is Christmas.

And how nice. A police escort.

Here. I believe that's COD.

No, it's CIA - caught in the act.

(chuckles) Have ya red-handed.

Your bills have the same serial number

as the phony ones floating all over town.

Watch that. What do you mean phony?

As in you're under arrest for counterfeiting.

But-But you don't understand.

That money was planted.

Right. Planted all over town.

No. No. I mean, I grew it.

I've taken a few security precautions.

There. Now you'll see.

It may not have been printed,

but that money is 100% natural.

Aah!

So that's your money tree, huh?

You've been watching too many cartoons, duck.

Come on, they're waiti'' for you downtown.

My dad's no crook!

Although he does short me on my allowance every chance he gets.

(Launchpad) Don't worry, DW. We'll find a way.

We'll help ya!

We'll just lock up this funny money for evidence.

Oh, and I certainly don't want to forget the money tree.

This is real important evidence.

(wheezing laughter)

Oh, this really blows.

Kids shouldn't have to cope with such harsh reality.

Yeah, it's rough havin' your dad in jail.

Huh? No, I mean, I can't believe

we've gotta return all this stuff we bought.

But getting Dad out of jail wouldn't hurt, either.

Hey, chase those clouds away.

All we have to do is make DW's bail.

I'll give him my last dime.

Oops. Hee-hee. Guess I spent that, too.

All I've got is my allowance.

Well, that's more than me.

All that's in my piggy bank is some change

and a bunch of that phony money.

That won't do anyone any good.

(oinking)

What's goin' on?

Looks like ol' Piggy Wiggy wants to do the hokey-pokey.

(all) Aah!

Oh, no, you don't. This little piggy's gonna stay home.

Oof! Honker, don't let it out!

(grunts)

Help!

We're comin', little buddy.

Whaa!

Gosalyn!

Launchpad!

Oh, do you think it could be a prowler, dear?

(gasps) A prowler?

Somebody's after our money.

Our money?

It won't hurt to double-check.

Should be right down... here?

Maybe I didn't dig deep enough.

Herb, why would our money be in the backyard?

Um, I buried it.

Just a little extra security measure, honeybunch.

Oh. Well, where's the money now, hmm?

Well, I thought I buried it right here,

but, you know, I think it was over by the roses.

I'll have it out in two shakes of a pup's tail.

I've gotta find a way outta this mess.

(running footsteps)

Oof!

There's an escape I wouldn't have thought of.

(echoes) This looks like a job for...

Darkwing Duck.

Yee-ha!

Please let me go, Piggy.

I promise never to eat a ham sandwich again.

(Gosalyn) Hang on, Honker!

We'll bring that pig down.

Nice toss, Gos.

That outta tire out the little pigster.

(horn honking) (both) Whoa!

Whoa! Now, there's a new way of making a night withdrawal.

(gulps)

(horns honk)

(birds tweet)

Gosalyn, what are you doing out?

I was chasing him.

Look at this.

These counterfeit bills are like seeds.

That's why the evidence locker sprouted roots

and how the bank vault left the bank.

Now I know who's behind the crime wave.

How stupid could I be?

Does he really want us to answer that?

Thank you for your support.

Don't you see? It can only be one villain.

That half-duck half-plant crook

Dr. Reginald Bushroot.

Hee-hee-hee. Not bad for a mutated research scientist, huh?

Heh-heh-heh.

I developed plants that not only make money,

they take money, too.

Now that I'm rich,

I can give my plant pals the goodies they deserve.

Looky, imported bottled water.

(gulps)

Ahh. (ka-ching)

Ooh, what do you think of these expensive

designer-painted pots?

Only the best for you, babe.

Ooh! (giggles)

The whole world is ours for the mulching.

Don't count your seeds before they sprout.

Oh, no! Not him again!

I am the terror that flaps in the night.

Stop that guy!

I am the clipper that trims your hedges.

I am Darkwing Duck.

You're finished, Bushroot.

I figured out your whole scheme except for one thing.

Why steal money when you can grow it?

I really didn't want to, but mine doesn't last.

Whose does?

Well, you won't need money in prison.

(nervous laughter) I can't go in there.

I'd never get enough sunlight.

(Darkwing) So rent yourself a tanning booth.

(all grunt)

Uh-oh.

Ha-ha.

Thought I'd be a pushover, didn't ya?

Ha-ha-ha-ha-hee-hee. Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha.

Well, I'm going shopping

while you stay here and rot on the vine.

Go ahead, boys. Hee-hee-hee.

Give 'em the squeeze play.

(♪ horns)

We've been in some tight spots before, DW,

but never with musical accompaniment.

Well, maybe I can strike a more positive note.

Listen up, bud, it's my turn now.

(♪ snake-charming)

Major-league impressive, Dad.

Whew. (plants cheering)

Guess Mom was right. Plants do like music.

Right. And now my next number

will feature Bushroot singing the jailhouse blues.

How much for the whole place?

Sell my fertilizer factory? Never.

Why, I make the finest gourmet plant food in all of St. Canard.

(inhales) Ah, smell that aroma.

Feel that consistency.

Mmm-mmm-mmm. Ohh.

And savor that flavor.

Look, I'll pay whatever you ask. Anything.

I-I can't sell.

This factory's been in my family for generations.

We never were a close family.

(cackles)

Oh, boy, this is swell.

Think of the dinner parties I can throw.

Come on in, boys!

I've got enough food to feed a forest!

Well, I'm rolling in fertilizer!

Oh, you're in deep, all right.

Put 'em up.

Yi!

(arms whistle)

Oh, see what you made me do?

Well, I hate it when this happens.

So do I. It's disgusting.

Why can't you just leave me alone, you-you sap-sucking fungus?

You oughta know

Darkwing Duck always gets the bad guy.

Look, I'll pay you to go away.

Here, here, go buy yourself a new costume,

maybe something in green, huh?

Sorry, Mr. Money Tree, this duck's not for sale.

And neither are my companions.

Oh!

Besides, it's time you learned that crime doesn't pay.

Huh? Get him, guys.

His gun can't hurt you.

Au contraire. I'm about to blow them away.

Looks like I'm up a tree.

You see? Maybe you can defoliate us,

but you cannot defeat us.

Get the others.

(all) Whoa!

Ew, this stinks.

Now, there's an understatement.

Hey! Aah!

Hey, put them down!

Let me go, Twiggy, or I'll tear you limb from limb.

Hey, wait a minute, big guy.

What are you gonna do with them?

(gasps) Mulch them?

That's awfully final, not to mention extremely messy.

(Honker and Gosalyn) No!

Whoa!

(pants) Better put a move on, kids.

Let's see how you like the heat.

Ow, ow, ow! Ahh!

I'm getting tired.

Here you go, buddy.

Hurry, Darkwing!

I'm comin', Gos!

Ow, ow, oww!

Get him out! Get him out!

Come on, Honker.

Stretch! Quick!

Start climbing.

Come back, money trees.

I need you to make a down payment on a farm. Aah!

Ow-oh-ooh! Ow! Ow! Oww!

Well, he bought it.

Ah, what some folks won't do to save a buck.

But, hey, that's where greed will get you.

No wonder they say money is the root of all evil.

I guess that money-tree mania

got the better of all of us.

Ha-ha. Ahh.

Some more than others.

At least some good came out of it.

Herb's getting a lot more exercise.

Come on over, neighbors. You can't hardly miss.

That's can hardly miss.

Uhh. Whatever.

♪ Darkwing Duck

♪ Darkwing Duck

♪ Darkwing Duck

♪ Darkwing Duck ♪