Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:09,679
Hey!
2
00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:11,799
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey!
3
00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:15,319
It's Chri-i-i-i-stmas!
4
00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:17,879
What are you talking about?
It's Halloween!
5
00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:19,279
Well, nearly Christmas.
6
00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:21,599
Only 55 more sleeps.
7
00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:23,799
Ha! How long has it been now?
8
00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:26,599
What? Oh, four hours 33.
9
00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:29,199
One more minute since
the last time you asked, Kitty!
10
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:33,279
I should be there.
Curse these infernal boundaries!
11
00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:35,079
Er... What happening?
12
00:00:35,080 --> 00:00:37,479
They left in the night, Robin.
Alison...
13
00:00:37,480 --> 00:00:38,719
PHONE RINGS NEARBY
14
00:00:38,720 --> 00:00:42,479
Shut up, shut up, shut up,
shut up, shut up!
15
00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,679
PHONE KEEPS RINGING
16
00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:46,679
ANSWER MACHINE BEEPS
17
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,039
MIKE: Um, hi, everyone.
18
00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:51,399
This feels weird. Can you hear me?
19
00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:53,839
Of course you can, I just can't hear
you. For goodness' sake!
20
00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,119
Spit it out, man! Go on!
Shhh, I can't hear him!
21
00:00:56,120 --> 00:00:58,679
Anyway, Alison asked me to call,
22
00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:00,519
just to say it's all good,
23
00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:03,399
mum and baby are doing well. Ahh!
And...
24
00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:05,799
GHOSTS: It's a girl!
25
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:09,319
Here we are, Mia,
this is where we live.
26
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,639
Mia! Mia! Hello, Mia!
27
00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:15,159
Mia? I thought she was called Bumpy?
Bumpy Cooper?
28
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,919
Alison? Alison?
29
00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:20,079
Oh, SHE's here.
30
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,559
GHOSTS: Hi, Betty.
31
00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:22,959
You get your feet up, Alison,
32
00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:24,799
and I'll go and make us all a cup of
tea.
33
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:29,120
And get that heating on, Mike,
warm up this old place. Yes, Mum.
34
00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:31,759
Thank you so much!
35
00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:34,799
This is really kind,
you don't have to stay.
36
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:39,200
Nonsense! Just a few days until
you get into the swing of things.
37
00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:43,519
Right, I've sterilised
all the bottles in the...
38
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,559
Where are you off to?
39
00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:48,399
Just for a little walk. Just
for a stroll around the grounds.
40
00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,239
Oh, I'll come too!
You don't have to...
41
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:52,679
It's mild out,
make sure she doesn't overheat.
42
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,360
It's cold out,
make sure Mia has a hat on!
43
00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:20,919
MIA CRIES
44
00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:21,959
Shh, it's OK!
45
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:24,599
# Jingle bells, this girl smells
46
00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:26,679
# Cos Mia's done a poo! #
Haven't you?
47
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:27,719
HE BLOWS RASPBERRY
48
00:02:27,720 --> 00:02:29,799
It's fascinating to see a father
so involved.
49
00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:30,919
Yes!
50
00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:32,359
I changed a nappy once.
51
00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:33,479
Never again.
52
00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:37,599
Oh, come along, it can't be
that bad... Oh! Whoa! Hold!
53
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:39,439
Hold! Ohh!
54
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,559
How did all of that...
come out of that?
55
00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:42,799
It's extraordinary.
56
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,159
I won't pretend
I don't have regrets about my life,
57
00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:49,200
but this is not one of them, sir!
58
00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:52,439
Accacha poo,
eechappee-chappee-poo,
59
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:55,479
choo-ee-chappee-choo.
60
00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,039
Patrick, what on earth
are you doing?
61
00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:58,599
Oh, it's babytalk.
62
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,479
Yeah, they love it,
they find it very soothing.
63
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:03,799
I mean, you've got to make
the most of it.
64
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,119
Mary always said they stop seeing us
once they can walk.
65
00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:07,719
MIA STARTS CRYING
66
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,080
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, don't...
67
00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:14,719
She's probably hungry. I'll feed
her. Cool. Everybody out!
68
00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:16,800
Urgh! Come along! Chop-chop!
69
00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:22,480
Hmm.
70
00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,959
Something the matter, Robin?
71
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:30,199
I dunno. I just don't feel...
Christmassy, you know?
72
00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:31,919
You always called it a fad.
73
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,439
That was before.
74
00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:37,079
Since Alison come,
it been my favourite time of year.
75
00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:41,279
Well, it's not Christmas Day yet,
so... No, but...
76
00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:43,759
..I normally feel Christmassy by
now.
77
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:46,319
Well, there aren't as many
decorations
78
00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:49,039
because they're busy with Mia.
Yeah.
79
00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:51,199
Hmm.
80
00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:53,760
Morning, Thomas. Good day, Alison.
81
00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:58,159
Given the situation with the baby,
82
00:03:58,160 --> 00:03:59,319
it's only understandable
83
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,639
that preparations would be
compromised this year.
84
00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:03,519
We must make do with
the decorations we have.
85
00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:05,479
What was that about decorations?
86
00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,839
Was that what? Robin wants more.
87
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:09,639
Robin want more.
88
00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:13,039
Well, I'll ask Mike
to put some more up. What's that?
89
00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:16,479
No, just... I was thinking
out loud
90
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:20,439
that I think that I should ask Mike
to put up more decorations.
91
00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:21,639
Could do.
92
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:22,679
MIA STARTS CRYING
93
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:26,119
Ohhh... I just fed you!
She needs winding.
94
00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,839
Hardly surprising with all that
foreign food you eat, Alison.
95
00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:29,959
Come here, I'll take her.
96
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:32,159
It all gets passed on, you know.
97
00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:35,319
You mark my words,
you need simple foods
98
00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:37,919
like potatoes, bread, fish.
99
00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:41,759
Good, fishy milk for her brain,
you see? Here we go.
100
00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:46,399
Well, that'll never work.
Slap her on the back, woman!
101
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:47,439
MIA BURPS
102
00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:50,599
Oh. Oh. There she blows.
103
00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:54,199
Good girl! Aww!
104
00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:57,560
KITTY BELCHES
105
00:04:58,560 --> 00:04:59,760
Urgh!
106
00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:03,119
What on earth has come over you,
Kitty?
107
00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:05,240
Well, you all loved it when she did
it!
108
00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,679
I'll just...
I'll go and get the decorations.
109
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:10,960
Yes, yes, yes...
110
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:19,960
Are you OK, Thomas?
Pleeease. You have to stop!
111
00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:22,559
You have a baby now, Alison.
112
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:25,519
We cannot carry on as
if nothing has happened. But-
113
00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:27,720
Everything has changed, Alison.
114
00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:30,680
We must contain ourselves.
115
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,999
If not for Michael,
116
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,399
for the wee bairn.
117
00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:37,920
OK.
118
00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:44,040
Think of the child, Alison!
119
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:48,760
DOORBELL RINGS
120
00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:53,479
There you are, Alison!
It's so nice to get a moment to...
121
00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:57,200
Hi. Thank you. Yes!
122
00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:01,439
What's that? Mike's present.
123
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:04,120
I got him these rare trainers
that he wanted.
124
00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:08,879
I don't think those will fit him.
125
00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:10,159
I got a child's ten.
126
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:11,479
Anyway, I was thinking we could...
127
00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:12,879
Kitty, I'm really sorry,
I've just...
128
00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:15,159
I'm gonna have to sort this out.
129
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:16,240
Arghh!
130
00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:22,920
Whoa! God, I need a coffee.
131
00:06:24,280 --> 00:06:25,999
Hang on, am I allowed another one?
132
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:28,079
Well, it does affect
the breast milk.
133
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,279
This is why you need a wet nurse,
Alison.
134
00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:31,999
You could eat
and drink what you like.
135
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,759
You've gone and made yourself
a human dairy farm.
136
00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:37,919
OK, well, I think that maybe
I'll have a herbal, then, instead.
137
00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:40,079
Good girl.
138
00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:41,239
Where are the teabags?
139
00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:42,919
I moved them to the dresser.
140
00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:44,559
Closer to the spoons.
141
00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,079
Well, I mean they were...
they were closer to the kettle,
142
00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:48,719
but no, yeah, no, that makes sense.
143
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:51,359
I'll have a bigger sort-out
another day. Hm-hmm.
144
00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:53,200
BETTY HUMS TO HERSELF
145
00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:56,879
Dad must be missing you.
146
00:06:56,880 --> 00:07:00,039
Oh, he's probably glad
I'm not there to nag him.
147
00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:02,679
I know he'll miss his mince pies.
148
00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:05,319
Are you gonna give him some?
That batch?
149
00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:07,559
Whilst they're fresh?
150
00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:10,519
I'm here as long as you need me.
151
00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:13,439
Yeah. Yeah, about that...
152
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:15,759
And somebody needs their nap.
153
00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:17,439
Yeah, I am tired.
154
00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:18,999
Oh, you mean Mia.
155
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,800
I've got it, I've got it.
156
00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:23,599
I've got her.
157
00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,400
Yes, yes, you're sleepy.
158
00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:31,800
ALISON HUMS THE FIRST NOEL
159
00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,519
Are you gorgeous? Yes.
160
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:42,479
Yes, you're gorgeous.
161
00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,319
Mummy loves you.
162
00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:47,360
Yeah! Yeah.
163
00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:53,040
MIA BABBLES
164
00:07:56,320 --> 00:08:00,960
All right, that's all right.
That's OK. Come here. Yeah.
165
00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:08,479
MIKE: There we go.
166
00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,719
GHOSTS: Oh! Oh, yes, isn't that
lovely!
167
00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:12,719
JULIAN: Huh? Huh?
168
00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:14,399
Now you feel Christmassy?
169
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,519
Nope.
170
00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:18,399
What's missing, Robin?
171
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:19,559
How you mean?
172
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:22,519
We need to work out what puts
you in the Christmas mood.
173
00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:24,799
It's different for everyone,
you see.
174
00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:28,039
For me, it was always
the smell of the mulled wine.
175
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:29,639
Oh, dear, Mia's awake.
176
00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:31,999
She's cooing away at something.
Hmmm.
177
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:35,359
Prepping the pud-pud with Mumsy.
Stir-up Sunday.
178
00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:38,439
It was never really Christmas for me
until the office party,
179
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,039
or rather the after-party,
when a few of us would go upstairs
180
00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:44,519
and have a jolly good...
181
00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:47,839
Orjee-borgee-jobby-jobby!
Ajobby-jobby-joo-joo.
182
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:52,519
You try. Huh? Well, I...
183
00:08:52,520 --> 00:08:53,879
OK.
184
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:55,439
HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
185
00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:59,199
Dabbah dabbah dabbah, dabbah dabbah
dah...
186
00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:03,159
What? No! It's got to be
more melodic, you know,
187
00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:06,199
like acccha-poo-choo,
poo-choo-gaga-gee!
188
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:07,239
Right.
189
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,239
Daba-daba-daba, dee-daba-daba...
190
00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:13,519
What are you doing? What?
Ah... No, it was Patrick.
191
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:15,199
I... I just put her down,
192
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,359
and you're exciting her
when she needs her sleep.
193
00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:19,319
Yeah, no, we should go. Erm...
194
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,039
No, it's too late now,
she's... she's wide awake. Ah!
195
00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:25,639
Oh, but she's irresistible.
196
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,239
Aren't you? Yes, you are!
197
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:31,719
Yes, you are,
ugga-cubba-jubba-ji-wa-jah!
198
00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:32,879
WATER SPLASHES
199
00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:34,479
Is that nice?
200
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,320
She's ironed all my tracksuits -
again!
201
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:43,279
Look, I'm really grateful
that she stayed to help, OK?
202
00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:45,399
I really am, but...
You can say it.
203
00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:47,239
She's driving me mad. Hm!
204
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:50,679
It's not just the baby,
it's like she's taking over.
205
00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:53,399
I mean she's moving
stuff in the kitchen,
206
00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,679
she's changed
the settings on the thermostat.
207
00:09:55,680 --> 00:09:58,879
Really, if you don't say something,
I will - because she can't swim.
208
00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:01,759
What? She can't start swimming yet.
Hiya.
209
00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:03,599
I called the pool and they said,
like,
210
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:05,679
she has to be three months
at least, so...
211
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:09,279
She's already a water-baby,
aren't you, my darling?
212
00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:14,319
Yes! A guji-koo-koo,
a-guji-koo-kooooh!
213
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:17,119
Hey, that's not bad. Yeah,
that's first class. Mum, erm...
214
00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:18,839
Before you start, Mike,
215
00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:22,879
I've just been on the phone
with your dad and you were right.
216
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:25,319
Looks like he needs me to come home.
Oh?
217
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:27,119
Oh. I'm really sorry.
218
00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:29,879
I know it's scary, but I've been
here for what, six weeks?
219
00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:30,919
BOTH: Seven.
220
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:35,559
And he's missing me. He's probably
living on takeaways. Oh, gosh.
221
00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:38,240
Well, we're going to miss you too.
Yeah!
222
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:42,039
Maybe I should ask him to come
here instead? No!
223
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:43,919
Definitely don't. We'll manage.
224
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:45,559
We'll manage! No, no need for that.
225
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,599
That's... Who's going to feed
the cats, Mum?
226
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:48,720
We'll manage. We will.
227
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:53,480
BETTY: I'm going to miss you, little
one. Yes.
228
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,399
Argh.
229
00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,239
Everything all right, Alison?
230
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,879
Oh, erm, I just...
231
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:21,599
I ordered Mike these trainers
that he really wanted for Christmas
232
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:25,279
and they were the wrong size and now
everywhere's sold out, so...
233
00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:28,279
Oh, that's all right,
I got him those.
234
00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:29,719
Oh, great.
235
00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:31,480
BETTY CHUCKLES
236
00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:48,439
150 yards, a seven iron, I think,
yeah!
237
00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,960
LADY BUTTON: Julian! I need you!
238
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:04,759
She's left the blanket off, look!
239
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,880
The poor child will freeze.
All right, all right, all right.
240
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:16,959
Haunted?
241
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:20,399
Mum, it's... it's... Well...
242
00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:23,360
The truth is... erm...
243
00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:28,799
The truth is...that it's a creaky
old house
244
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:30,519
and, yeah, if you're not used to it,
245
00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,039
it can feel a little creepy,
especially at night.
246
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:36,279
But...there aren't any ghosts.
247
00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:37,399
KITTY: Well, there are.
248
00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:41,199
I saw a figure in a dress,
on the monitor.
249
00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:43,439
And the blanket moved itself.
250
00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:46,999
Please, Mum, don't worry, it's fine.
251
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,799
I know what I saw.
I'll...
252
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:53,679
I'll stay up there with her.
I'm going to bed anyway.
253
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:55,679
Well, I ain't going anywhere.
254
00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:58,519
I'm not leaving my granddaughter
in this haunted house.
255
00:12:58,520 --> 00:12:59,920
I'm going to unpack.
256
00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:03,319
Evening, everybody.
257
00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:04,359
What's up, guys?
258
00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:06,639
What?
259
00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:10,199
We just need to convince her
there aren't any ghosts.
260
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,599
But there are.
261
00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:15,079
But she doesn't know that. She does.
262
00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:18,840
No, but...that could have been
anything.
263
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,799
You want to gaslight my mum?
264
00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:25,679
Yeah, I want to gaslight your mum.
265
00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:28,159
I'm almost surprised you'd never
seen it before,
266
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,800
it happens all the time. Look,
if you just keep watching...
267
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:33,759
JULIAN STRAINS
268
00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:37,439
See! You probably saw it
flicker in your peripheral vision
269
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:40,919
and it looked like something moving.
Hmm.
270
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:44,040
It doesn't explain the blanket,
though.
271
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:49,360
MIA CRIES
272
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:53,999
No, no, no, no, no.
Step no further.
273
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,439
Alison was very clear. She doesn't
want to see Fanny on camera.
274
00:13:57,440 --> 00:14:01,719
What? Operation Bye Bye, Betty.
Well, why aren't we involved?
275
00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:03,839
Well, she only needed the, um...
276
00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:06,599
Ghosts with skills, yeah, rub it in.
277
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,799
And you can stop right there,
Thorne!
278
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,239
You leave Alison alone,
she's very busy.
279
00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:14,079
Good for her,
it's no business of mine.
280
00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:16,159
What? I'm no home-wrecker.
281
00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:19,439
It's over between me
and Alison, I've moved on.
282
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:20,519
Oh, really?
283
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:23,160
What, to someone new? Yes! Who?
284
00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,120
And I'll tell you who.
285
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,240
A certain Ms Jennifer Aniston.
286
00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,479
Rachel from Friends?
And so much more.
287
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:37,319
Jen is an artist, an icon
288
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:38,799
and a powerful businesswoman,
289
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:42,040
so, yes, I think
I do love her, thank you very much.
290
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,439
So, erm, so I'm thinking
that the breeze just blew in...
291
00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:51,919
The window was closed, Alison.
No, but... Well...
292
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,439
The draft can still get in
because it's the old window frames.
293
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,919
Like, we can't afford to replace
them,
294
00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,119
so the wind still gets in.
295
00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:01,679
There, you see?
296
00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,160
Waaaa!
297
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,800
Wooowaaa!
298
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:13,599
Hmm.
299
00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:16,079
There you are. Huh?
300
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:18,119
Feeling Christmassy yet?
301
00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:21,479
No. Great! Because I've got an idea.
302
00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:22,679
Music.
303
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:25,039
That's what always gives me
a Christmas tingle.
304
00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:28,239
McCartney, Wizzard,
Bing for the nanas.
305
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:29,679
Bring your bananas?
306
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:32,880
Christmas hits!
You must have a favourite?
307
00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:36,039
It's an old house.
308
00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:37,159
Dodgy electrics.
309
00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:38,439
Draughty windows. But...
310
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:41,039
You don't need to worry about Mia,
Mum. We're all good.
311
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,799
MERRY XMAS EVERYBODY BY SLADE PLAYS
ON STEREO
312
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,559
Oh, good lord!
313
00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:47,359
That...is the stereo.
314
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:49,399
Erm, I put the stereo on a timer
when we go out
315
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:50,799
so it sounds like we're in.
316
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:56,199
But you've not gone out
since Mia was born. Yeah, I...
317
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:59,239
I was cleaning there earlier,
and I must have turned the dial.
318
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:02,559
Silly Daddy!
319
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:04,159
# So here it is... #
320
00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:07,319
Huh? Huh?
321
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:08,919
Yeah, I like the song.
322
00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,799
And I love the dance.
323
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:12,200
I just don't feel very...
324
00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:16,079
Shut it down! Shut it down!
Shut it down! Shut it down!
325
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,279
Oh, yeah. Down!
326
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:19,799
HE STRAINS
327
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:23,039
I should turn that off,
because it's set to last an hour.
328
00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:24,079
MUSIC SWITCHES OFF
329
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:27,839
Or was it? Hmm.
330
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:30,759
I can tell when you're lying,
Michael. I'm not lying.
331
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:33,159
CAPTAIN CLEARS HIS THROAT
332
00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,159
ROBIN AND PAT: Sorry, Alison.
333
00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,119
What they said.
334
00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:41,359
Betty, if it was a...
poltergeist or whatever,
335
00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:45,519
you'd think it would do worse
than playing with the stereo.
336
00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:48,799
Well, maybe that's how it starts.
337
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:51,120
OK, well, look. OK...
338
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,120
If there is something in this
room...
339
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,879
..give us a sign.
340
00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:00,800
CAPTAIN CLEARS HIS THROAT AGAIN
341
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:05,919
See? There's...
342
00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:08,039
There's nothing... Oh!
343
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:09,239
Oh, my God!
344
00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:11,079
I was putting the decorations
up yesterday,
345
00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:13,199
and I must have not put it
on the hook properly! Mum!
346
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:16,719
Was that a ghost? No, that was you.
347
00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:17,760
Mum!
348
00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:21,920
So that went well.
349
00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:25,119
How are we gonna convince...
I don't know.
350
00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:27,000
I'm too tired to even think.
351
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,799
Can I just sleep? Of course, yeah.
352
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,280
Yes!
353
00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:40,200
VEHICLE APPROACHES
354
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:44,759
Betty? Thank you for coming
so quickly, Reverend.
355
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:46,279
Well, I was heading out anyway
356
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:48,479
to get the nativity display
out of storage
357
00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:49,999
and you sounded rather distraught,
358
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,720
so I didn't want to leave
you in a state. Come in.
359
00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:00,079
I must say, it's a
most unusual request.
360
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:03,079
I've never been asked before.
But you can do it?
361
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:04,679
Well, yes, it is a thing.
362
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:08,079
It's just, certainly no one
I know has ever been asked...
363
00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:09,239
Father?
364
00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:10,599
Good evening, Michael.
365
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:12,759
What are you doing here?
366
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:15,999
He's here to perform an exorcism.
367
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:19,559
Huh? Oh! Great.
368
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:22,160
I'll just get my prayer book.
369
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,719
MIKE WHISPERS: Ghosts!
If you can hear me,
370
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:32,279
there's a vicar here to do
an exorcism.
371
00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:34,839
Get out! I know you can't leave,
but...
372
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:38,160
I don't know! Ghosts! Are you there?
373
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:42,359
Home-raised chicken
and plenty of good British veg...
374
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,879
Betty's brought the pastor.
375
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,959
Pasta? Well, that's not
very Christmassy.
376
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,279
No, no, no, the reverend!
The vicar!
377
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,560
He's here to perform an exorcism!
378
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:02,839
My goodness, what will we do?
379
00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:04,559
Maybe it's all right.
380
00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,519
It's demons that they're after,
isn't it?
381
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,680
You know, evil spirits
who do harm to the living.
382
00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:16,639
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God!
383
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:18,199
Yeah, maybe we should...
384
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,039
Let's get out of here! Quick!
Come on!
385
00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:24,439
Wait! Where's Humphrey? Oh!
386
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:26,160
The other bit!
387
00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:32,759
If there are any spirits
here in this house, do not hide,
388
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:36,399
we call on you to hear God's word.
389
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:39,919
Humphrey! Humphrey! Humphrey!
390
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:41,799
Guys, down here!
391
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,279
There! Quick!
Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry!
392
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:47,800
Come on. Quickly, Thomas!
Oh, thank goodness.
393
00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:51,159
Visit, Lord, we pray, this place,
394
00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:56,199
and drive far from it
the snares of the enemy...
395
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:57,599
Alison! Alison!
396
00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:58,959
What? Is it Mia? No, she's fine.
397
00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:00,759
It's Mum,
she's brought the vicar round.
398
00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:04,159
What? Why? He's doing an exorcism.
What?
399
00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:06,000
It can't work, can it?
400
00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:09,279
I don't know.
401
00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:12,399
Because you have made
the Lord your refuge,
402
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:15,279
there shall no evil happen to you,
403
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,280
for he shall give his angels
charge over you.
404
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:22,159
There shall no evil happen to you,
405
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,879
for he shall give his angels
charge over you.
406
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:29,839
BOTH: There shall no evil happen to
you...
407
00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:33,799
..for he shall give his angels
charge over you.
408
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:37,760
Through Jesus Christ our Lord.
BOTH: Amen.
409
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:44,559
There's nothing to
worry about now, Alison.
410
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:46,359
The house is clean.
411
00:20:46,360 --> 00:20:48,720
Thank you, Reverend.
412
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:53,800
Well, there's a first
time for everything, eh?
413
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:10,359
ROBIN: Alison?
414
00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:12,279
Has he gone?
415
00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:14,559
Honestly, I'm just pleased
you're reassured.
416
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:17,119
I can't thank you enough, Reverend.
417
00:21:17,120 --> 00:21:19,359
God bless and Merry Christmas.
418
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:20,760
Merry Christmas to you too!
419
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:27,239
MUSIC PLAYS: Hark!
The Herald Angels Sing
420
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:30,160
Wow! That's magical.
421
00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:33,920
Now you feel Christmassy?
422
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:36,600
No.
423
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,639
Happy now? Yes.
Shall I help you pack?
424
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:49,839
Well, I think
I'm gonna stay a little bit longer,
425
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,399
just to make sure that it worked.
Mum!
426
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,759
He said himself that he'd never
done it before, so... Betty, Betty!
427
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:55,840
Can I say something?
428
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:00,999
We need to be on our own now.
429
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,479
You've been so generous,
and we've...
430
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:05,799
..we've learned so much from you.
431
00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:09,519
But we need to find our own
way as a family.
432
00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:11,279
And I'm sure we'll make
lots of mistakes
433
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:13,799
and we won't know what we're doing
sometimes... but...
434
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:15,760
..but we'll come to you for advice.
435
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,360
When you need it. Of course.
I'm sorry.
436
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:25,959
Do you understand?
You're a great mum.
437
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:27,200
Thanks.
438
00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:30,679
And we'll see you at yours
Christmas Day?
439
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:32,439
Or you can stay till new year
if you like.
440
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:36,520
No, just Christmas Day is fine.
Yeah.
441
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:39,799
CAR DRIVES AWAY
Oh, that's a relief.
442
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:41,080
Just us now.
443
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:46,959
Mission accomplished.
444
00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:48,919
Yes, no more meddling in-laws.
445
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:53,039
Now, you must wake Mia for a good
long feed so she sleeps through.
446
00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:55,439
Otherwise she'll be wailing
the house down
447
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:58,239
at goodness knows what hour.
Pot/kettle, anyone?
448
00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:00,759
Alison, could I sing her a lullaby
while she feeds?
449
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:02,279
Something soothing like,
450
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:05,319
# Close your eyes, Mummy doesn't
care about anyone else but you... #
451
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:07,679
I can't believe that nativity scene
didn't do it, Robin.
452
00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:10,079
If I don't feel it, I don't feel
it. Oh, who am I kidding?
453
00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:13,039
I don't love Jennifer Aniston,
it's you I love, Alison.
454
00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:14,599
GHOSTS ALL CLAMOUR AT ONCE
455
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,799
And it always will be! My...
456
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,200
GHOSTS FALL SILENT
457
00:23:24,120 --> 00:23:25,680
We're as bad as Betty.
458
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:33,359
What's Daddy doing?
What's Daddy doing?
459
00:23:33,360 --> 00:23:35,439
A wiggle wiggle wiggle!
460
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:37,559
You wanna go see Daddy?
461
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:40,480
Come here. Yeah! Yeah, you do. Yes!
Oh!
462
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:45,880
MIKE BLOWS RASPBERRIES
463
00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:49,719
ALISON LAUGHS
464
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,199
Knock, knock.
465
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,639
Oh, guys, can this...
466
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:54,879
Can this wait until I...
467
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,559
Don't worry, Alison, we're not here
to ask for anything.
468
00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:58,960
Or to meddle, no.
469
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:04,240
We have assembled here because
we would like to make a proposal.
470
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:06,559
Right.
471
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:11,199
When you first arrived here,
I thought you were a prostitute.
472
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:12,999
Yeah, you did.
473
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,079
You said that before. Did I?
Yeah!
474
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:19,239
I did,
but I've come to think of you...
475
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:20,999
..as my own daughter.
476
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:22,439
Granddaughter, surely?
477
00:24:22,440 --> 00:24:24,239
And even that's pushing it!
478
00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:28,919
Look, the point is, we're family.
479
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:30,599
We all feel that way.
480
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:35,159
And your family love you,
of course, but...but...
481
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,039
They can be a pain.
482
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:38,719
Even when they don't mean to be.
483
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:42,639
Because...they just can't help
being who they are.
484
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:45,840
And you need to be your own family
now.
485
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:48,999
I don't quite follow.
486
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:51,239
Like you say to Betty,
487
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,439
you got to find your own way.
488
00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:57,039
The last thing you need is constant
interference
489
00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:02,639
from a gaggle of uncles and aunties
and grannies and pets.
490
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:04,879
Hey, that offensive. Sorry.
491
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:06,599
What are you saying?
492
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,040
We can't leave, Alison.
493
00:25:11,120 --> 00:25:13,480
But you can.
494
00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:17,759
No. But we...we turned down the
offer to, to sell the house.
495
00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,159
So it's... It's too late.
496
00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:23,719
Believe me, if it was good business,
they'll still want it.
497
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,920
Why did I vote for this? I hate it!
498
00:25:27,120 --> 00:25:29,679
Think of Mia.
499
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:31,800
Think of Mike.
500
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:35,280
It's for the best.
501
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:47,439
Mike...
502
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:50,199
INAUDIBLE CONVERSATION
503
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:51,599
What have we done?
504
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:53,960
Maybe they'll decide to stay.
505
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:57,160
They won't, Kitty.
506
00:25:58,280 --> 00:25:59,840
We did the right thing.
507
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,400
Thanks, guys.
508
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:10,879
Oh.
509
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,120
What is it, Robin?
510
00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:14,799
I feel...
511
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:17,079
..Christmassy.
512
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:20,360
Ha, ha! There you go.
513
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:26,720
This one's for you.
514
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:33,559
# Have yourself a merry little
Christmas... #
515
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:36,720
ROBIN: I know what it is now.
516
00:26:38,360 --> 00:26:39,880
It's so simple.
517
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:44,400
It wasn't the decorations.
518
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,880
Or the music.
519
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:53,479
No, that not what Christmas about!
520
00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:55,879
Not really.
521
00:26:55,880 --> 00:27:01,759
# Have yourself a merry little
Christmas... #
522
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:05,040
The most Christmassy
feeling in the world...
523
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:08,440
..is when you give somebody a gift.
524
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:15,560
A gift you know
they will always remember.
525
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:29,799
# Once again, as in olden days
526
00:27:29,800 --> 00:27:32,839
# Happy golden days... #
527
00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:34,599
Oojie-googie-googie-googie,
528
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:36,119
poochie-googie-poochie,
529
00:27:36,120 --> 00:27:37,799
gaboochie-gaboochie-chee.
530
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:44,559
# Faithful friends
who are near to us
531
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:51,800
# Will be dear to us once more
532
00:27:53,640 --> 00:28:00,639
# Someday soon
we all will be together
533
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:07,240
# If the fates allow... #
534
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:11,759
Merry Christmas, lovely to see you
as always.
535
00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:14,320
I have your usual room ready
and waiting for you.
536
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:27,799
# So have yourself
a merry little Christmas... #
537
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:31,599
ALISON: Hi, guys. Merry Christmas!
538
00:28:31,600 --> 00:28:34,039
Of course we can, Kitty.
539
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,840
Thank you, Thomas, you flatter me.
540
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,079
What's new?
541
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,159
Julian...
542
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,320
ALISON LAUGHS
543
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,319
I'll never get tired of this.
544
00:28:51,320 --> 00:28:54,919
No, so nice. Lovely.
Wouldn't change it for the world.
545
00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:57,199
I think I can
feel my pores opening up!
546
00:28:57,200 --> 00:28:59,839
OTHERS AGREE
547
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:01,399
SNORING
548
00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:03,399
Mick! Is he gone?
549
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:04,720
What? He's just relaxed.
39714
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
