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1
00:00:02,044 --> 00:00:03,960
Marty?
2
00:00:04,010 --> 00:00:05,672
There are customers
waiting in the lounge
3
00:00:05,673 --> 00:00:07,674
and no one bringing their cars around.
4
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:09,842
Yeah, I know, Dad.
Lowell just quit this morning.
5
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:11,720
Of course he did.
6
00:00:11,770 --> 00:00:14,400
It is impossible to keep
employees these days.
7
00:00:14,450 --> 00:00:16,550
Nobody in your generation wants to work.
8
00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:19,520
Actually, he quit because
he sold a movie script
9
00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:21,720
to Oprah's company, but yeah.
10
00:00:23,270 --> 00:00:25,580
Well, if he wrote it
while he was working here,
11
00:00:25,630 --> 00:00:26,693
I want a percentage.
12
00:00:26,694 --> 00:00:28,570
And your mama get to meet Oprah.
13
00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:29,640
And Gayle.
14
00:00:32,190 --> 00:00:34,242
Mom, you are stressing me out.
15
00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:36,600
You are making this a very big deal,
16
00:00:36,650 --> 00:00:38,370
and I got a lot going on.
17
00:00:38,420 --> 00:00:40,540
Mom, I love you. Love you.
18
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,750
Love you, too, but
you're not hearing me!
19
00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:45,150
Yes, but everyone else is.
20
00:00:48,670 --> 00:00:50,860
I let my mom talk me into coming home
21
00:00:50,900 --> 00:00:52,051
to Calgary for a quick visit,
22
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:54,762
and suddenly she's throwing
me an enormous baby shower.
23
00:00:54,763 --> 00:00:57,840
- Oh.
- Yes, the pastor's fine.
24
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,268
But the whole congregation?
25
00:01:00,450 --> 00:01:02,510
I love you, too, Mommy.
26
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,290
That woman is gonna be the death of me.
27
00:01:04,340 --> 00:01:06,190
I told her I did not want a baby shower.
28
00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:08,600
Well, the baby is gonna need
a lot of stuff when it comes.
29
00:01:08,652 --> 00:01:10,390
Yes, but a free stroller
30
00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:12,400
and bottle warmer isn't
worth me having to explain
31
00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:14,320
to two dozen old ladies
how I accidentally
32
00:01:14,370 --> 00:01:15,701
let some random dude knock me up.
33
00:01:16,952 --> 00:01:18,690
No offense.
34
00:01:18,746 --> 00:01:21,030
Believe me, I know how moms can get.
35
00:01:22,124 --> 00:01:23,249
What? What's wrong?
36
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,001
I forgot to invite your mom.
37
00:01:25,002 --> 00:01:26,044
Oh!
38
00:01:26,045 --> 00:01:28,900
Oh, my God! The shower's tomorrow,
39
00:01:28,950 --> 00:01:31,299
- and in another country.
- It's okay. It's okay.
40
00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:32,550
Then why did you scream?
41
00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:34,960
Did I? I shouldn't have.
42
00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:36,960
What am I gonna do?
43
00:01:37,014 --> 00:01:39,000
Your mom is never gonna forgive me.
44
00:01:39,058 --> 00:01:40,990
Courtney, calm down, okay?
45
00:01:41,040 --> 00:01:42,340
It's gonna be okay.
46
00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:43,980
This isn't even her kind of thing.
47
00:01:44,030 --> 00:01:45,271
And it's all the way in Canada.
48
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:47,720
Trust me, you are doing her a favor.
49
00:01:47,770 --> 00:01:50,310
Now she doesn't have to
let you down by saying no.
50
00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:53,790
- Are you sure?
- Of course I'm sure.
51
00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:55,840
You think I don't know my own mother?
52
00:01:57,368 --> 00:02:02,140
Okay. All right, you just, you just,
you go and-and have fun.
53
00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:03,769
And, uh, I'll see you when you get back.
54
00:02:03,770 --> 00:02:05,040
Okay, okay, thank you.
55
00:02:05,090 --> 00:02:06,376
- All right.
- "Get back"?
56
00:02:06,377 --> 00:02:08,100
Is she going to lunch already?
57
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,200
No, Dad, she's going to Canada.
58
00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,007
Well, she better be back in an hour.
59
00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:17,500
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
60
00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:22,849
Dinner was fantastic, Gemma.
61
00:02:22,850 --> 00:02:24,329
The steaks were perfect.
62
00:02:24,330 --> 00:02:26,299
- Oh, thanks, Tina.
- Mm-hmm.
63
00:02:26,300 --> 00:02:28,606
Calvin, cognac?
64
00:02:28,607 --> 00:02:30,692
Ah, you're breaking out the 'yac.
65
00:02:32,410 --> 00:02:34,821
This friendship is finally paying off.
66
00:02:34,822 --> 00:02:37,865
So, Lamar, am I crazy, or did
you take the bus here tonight?
67
00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:39,569
You're not crazy, Gemma.
68
00:02:39,570 --> 00:02:41,749
The Datsun caught on fire.
69
00:02:41,750 --> 00:02:43,079
Ah, that's a bummer.
70
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,879
And you can't afford to buy another car
71
00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:46,289
because you can't find a job.
72
00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:48,710
You can't find a job because
he doesn't have a car.
73
00:02:48,711 --> 00:02:50,378
Mm.
74
00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:52,120
It's quite a pickle.
75
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:55,339
Well, I'd love to give you a job,
76
00:02:55,340 --> 00:02:57,219
but the school has a very clear policy
77
00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:58,850
on hiring convicted felons.
78
00:02:58,860 --> 00:02:59,888
You can't.
79
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:02,569
Damn it.
80
00:03:02,570 --> 00:03:05,800
Just wish we knew someone
who owned a private business.
81
00:03:08,380 --> 00:03:10,519
Ah, okay.
82
00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,817
I see I've been suckered by the 'yac.
83
00:03:12,818 --> 00:03:14,569
Mm-hmm.
84
00:03:14,570 --> 00:03:19,115
You guys always talk about how good
people deserve a second chance.
85
00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:21,869
Yes, but not from me, Dave.
86
00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:25,379
Besides, I can't help.
87
00:03:25,380 --> 00:03:27,290
I don't have any openings.
88
00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:32,504
Yes, you do. Didn't Lowell the
valet guy just quit this morning?
89
00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:39,677
I had forgotten that. Yes, Tina.
90
00:03:39,678 --> 00:03:42,347
Thank you so much for
that very timely reminder.
91
00:03:45,880 --> 00:03:48,269
Do you really believe Mama wouldn't care
92
00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:49,979
if she wasn't invited
to the baby shower?
93
00:03:49,980 --> 00:03:52,519
Of course she'd care.
She'd be heartbroken.
94
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:55,193
But that's why she's
never going to find out.
95
00:03:55,194 --> 00:03:57,429
Oh, really, Marty?
96
00:03:57,430 --> 00:03:59,929
This is the same woman who
knew Courtney was pregnant
97
00:03:59,930 --> 00:04:01,532
before Courtney knew she was pregnant.
98
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:04,499
I know. I know, I know,
but-but this is different.
99
00:04:04,500 --> 00:04:05,912
The shower's all the way in Canada.
100
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:07,729
And she don't know nobody who's going.
101
00:04:07,730 --> 00:04:09,207
It's not like she has magical powers.
102
00:04:09,208 --> 00:04:10,959
Marty, baby shower.
103
00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:12,669
She's a witch!
104
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,923
I want to throw Courtney a shower.
105
00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:18,007
Let's talk dates.
106
00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:20,109
- Oh, dates!
- Yeah.
107
00:04:20,110 --> 00:04:22,090
- For-for a future shower, yes.
- Yeah.
108
00:04:22,110 --> 00:04:25,306
No! No, no, Courtney doesn't want
a baby shower. She hates showers.
109
00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:27,016
What kind of person hates showers?
110
00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:29,936
Well, she's a millennial and
a Scorpio and a Hufflepuff.
111
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:31,939
Oh, come on, it'd be a super fun party
112
00:04:31,940 --> 00:04:33,147
where people give you stuff.
113
00:04:33,148 --> 00:04:35,067
I know. She's crazy.
114
00:04:37,930 --> 00:04:39,589
Talk about a milestone.
115
00:04:39,590 --> 00:04:41,389
You know, you never forget
the first day you drop off
116
00:04:41,390 --> 00:04:44,099
your long-lost dad at
his minimum-wage job
117
00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:45,494
just after he gets out of prison.
118
00:04:46,580 --> 00:04:47,830
It's like a great country song.
119
00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:50,660
Listen, just so we're clear, Lamar,
120
00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:52,649
there are a few requirements.
121
00:04:52,650 --> 00:04:54,502
All right, always keep
your uniform clean,
122
00:04:54,503 --> 00:04:56,504
be on time and...
123
00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:58,172
don't steal anything.
124
00:04:58,173 --> 00:04:59,383
Roger that.
125
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:04,639
Uh, Calvin, you promised
not to be prejudiced
126
00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:07,265
against a good man who
deserves a second chance.
127
00:05:07,266 --> 00:05:09,850
No, I said I'd give him a second chance.
128
00:05:09,900 --> 00:05:11,640
I didn't say I wasn't
gonna be prejudiced.
129
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:15,229
- Yo, Marty.
- Oh, hey.
130
00:05:15,230 --> 00:05:17,899
- You're back from Calgary.
- Yes, I am so relieved.
131
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,729
It was crazy. But I survived,
132
00:05:19,730 --> 00:05:21,696
and the baby got a ton of great gifts.
133
00:05:21,697 --> 00:05:24,669
And I made it back in
time for trivia night.
134
00:05:24,670 --> 00:05:26,019
Trivia night!
135
00:05:26,020 --> 00:05:27,899
We are going to crush that team
136
00:05:27,900 --> 00:05:29,078
- of cocky dental hygienists...
- Yes.
137
00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:30,872
... the Flossy Posse?
138
00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:32,291
Boo.
139
00:05:34,418 --> 00:05:37,044
Sorry, di... uh, did
I hear trivia night?
140
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:42,139
Because I am fantastic at trivia.
And I have no plans tonight, guys.
141
00:05:42,140 --> 00:05:43,385
Nothing.
142
00:05:44,450 --> 00:05:45,469
David.
143
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,419
Well, I know, but we already have four.
144
00:05:48,420 --> 00:05:51,643
Uh, it's me, Courtney,
Malcolm and Julian.
145
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:54,605
Here you go, boss man.
146
00:05:55,420 --> 00:05:56,981
- That Julian?
- Yeah.
147
00:05:56,982 --> 00:05:58,441
The coffee guy?
148
00:05:58,442 --> 00:06:00,659
He knows a million random facts.
149
00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:02,278
- Yeah. Julian?
- Yo.
150
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:03,446
Smallest Great Lake.
151
00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:05,169
By volume, Erie.
152
00:06:05,170 --> 00:06:06,909
By area, Ontario.
153
00:06:07,940 --> 00:06:10,010
Come on. Give me some, all right.
154
00:06:10,913 --> 00:06:14,917
And yet he wrote "Clavion" on my latte.
155
00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,649
Oh, hey, do me a favor.
Keep an eye out for boxes
156
00:06:20,650 --> 00:06:22,030
- at your house.
- Why?
157
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,440
Well, people are constantly
stealing packages at my building,
158
00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:27,386
so I sent all the baby shower
gifts to your house.
159
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,839
Oh, okay.
160
00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:32,266
When are they arriving?
161
00:06:32,267 --> 00:06:35,937
Well, the online registry stuff
should start getting there today.
162
00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:38,522
Today? Today, today.
163
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,816
As-as in today.
164
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:43,069
Oh, so convenient.
165
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,528
Yeah.
166
00:06:46,190 --> 00:06:47,729
Okay.
167
00:06:48,970 --> 00:06:50,618
Shello?
168
00:06:50,619 --> 00:06:52,663
Malcolm, this is no time for shello.
169
00:06:53,620 --> 00:06:55,456
Courtney sent the baby
shower gifts to our house.
170
00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:56,899
When Mom sees it,
she's gonna be more upset
171
00:06:56,900 --> 00:06:58,168
than when En Vogue broke up.
172
00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,462
Remember she came and
got us out of school?
173
00:07:01,463 --> 00:07:03,255
Oh, yeah, that was bad.
174
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,216
You know what? Hey, do not panic.
175
00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:06,676
Okay? Let me go check, baby bro.
176
00:07:06,677 --> 00:07:07,760
Okay.
177
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,680
Okay.
178
00:07:10,780 --> 00:07:12,140
Oh, whoa!
179
00:07:13,460 --> 00:07:15,769
- I'm gonna get these inside.
- Okay. Hurry, hurry.
180
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:18,730
Oh, my God!
181
00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:22,067
Malcolm? Malcolm, what is it?
182
00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:23,902
Hello, Malcolm.
183
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:36,229
So I'm supposed to believe
she just forgot to invite me
184
00:07:36,230 --> 00:07:39,050
to a secret Canadian baby shower?
185
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,979
- Yes, ma'am.
- Okay.
186
00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:46,090
Okay.
187
00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:47,519
And, uh...
188
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,639
Marty, he didn't want you to know
189
00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,763
because he thought that
you might be... mad.
190
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:53,880
Oh, I'm not mad.
191
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:57,476
You're not? Mama, that is good.
192
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,770
I'm more numb.
193
00:08:01,070 --> 00:08:02,950
Numb with sadness.
194
00:08:05,190 --> 00:08:06,999
I am so sorry, Mama.
195
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,280
Is there, uh, is there
anything I can do to help?
196
00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:11,109
You can meet a girl, get her pregnant,
197
00:08:11,110 --> 00:08:13,410
and invite me to the baby shower.
198
00:08:17,210 --> 00:08:19,207
I was thinking more like frozen yogurt.
199
00:08:24,610 --> 00:08:25,921
Hey, Calvin.
200
00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:28,049
Look at my dad out
here busting his hump.
201
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,939
Yes, he is.
202
00:08:29,940 --> 00:08:31,635
I hate to admit it, but you were right.
203
00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:33,679
Yeah. Hey, you know, I was thinking.
204
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:37,129
Maybe we should take you and Tina
out to drinks at Ernie's tonight.
205
00:08:37,130 --> 00:08:39,602
You know, celebrate how
well this is all going.
206
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,479
Is this just so you can
say, "I told you so"?
207
00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:42,855
Yeah, well, pretty much.
208
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,199
Well, if you're buying,
209
00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:45,959
you can say whatever you want.
210
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,349
And if your dad keeps working like this,
211
00:08:48,350 --> 00:08:49,946
he's gonna be employee of the month.
212
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:53,157
What, uh, does employee
of the month get?
213
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:56,035
They get to work another month.
214
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:57,245
Good enough.
215
00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:03,375
She wasn't mad?
216
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,711
No, I wish. She was sad.
217
00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,719
Oh, no, that's bad.
218
00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:10,199
Okay, okay, here's what I'm thinking.
219
00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:12,929
This is one of those problems
that just goes away
220
00:09:12,930 --> 00:09:14,490
if you avoid it.
221
00:09:16,550 --> 00:09:18,140
Like the "check engine" light.
222
00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:20,899
Okay, I feel like you're
mocking me with that answer.
223
00:09:20,900 --> 00:09:22,895
- Yes.
- But yes.
224
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:25,179
Marty, what if Courtney
finds out you lied?
225
00:09:25,180 --> 00:09:27,229
You told her Mama wouldn't
care about the shower.
226
00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:28,849
Mom and Courtney barely see each other.
227
00:09:28,850 --> 00:09:30,152
How's she gonna find out?
228
00:09:30,153 --> 00:09:31,904
Well, off the top of my head,
229
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,450
I can think of one way.
230
00:09:37,710 --> 00:09:39,411
Wait a minute, does that sign say... ?
231
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:40,788
Is it trivia night?
232
00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:43,666
- Oh, God.
- Guys, we should play.
233
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:46,085
This is starting to feel
like another Dave setup.
234
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:47,420
I'm getting good at them, right?
235
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:53,629
Hey...
236
00:09:53,630 --> 00:09:56,089
Mommy.
237
00:09:56,090 --> 00:09:58,339
I am so glad to see you,
238
00:09:58,340 --> 00:10:02,789
because when I told you that Courtney
wasn't having a baby shower,
239
00:10:02,790 --> 00:10:04,937
I just assumed you
meant in this country.
240
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:06,772
Canadian showers are
completely different.
241
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:08,229
It's like how they have
their own Thanksgiving,
242
00:10:08,230 --> 00:10:10,485
but it's on a different
day, so nobody cares.
243
00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:12,736
It's fine, Marty.
244
00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:15,399
- It is?
- Yes.
245
00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,729
I got a lot of clarity today.
246
00:10:17,730 --> 00:10:20,619
I know that I will never be a
part of my grandchild's life.
247
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:24,290
And I now know that
your word means nothing.
248
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:26,375
No, w... that is not fine.
249
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:29,044
- Mommy...
- Hey, Marty. Hi, Mrs. B.
250
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,969
Oh, you don't have to call me Mrs. B.
251
00:10:30,970 --> 00:10:32,969
Just call me "random lady,"
252
00:10:32,970 --> 00:10:35,427
because that's all I'll ever
be to my grandchild.
253
00:10:38,980 --> 00:10:42,449
All right, you drunken
brainiacs, it's trivia time!
254
00:10:43,727 --> 00:10:46,020
Marty, why is your mom mad at me?
255
00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:49,940
Well, that's a... it's a quagmire
256
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:52,234
in sort of an enigma,
257
00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:55,029
inside of a conundrum.
258
00:10:55,030 --> 00:10:56,740
It's a toughie.
259
00:10:59,510 --> 00:11:01,619
And final question of the round.
260
00:11:01,620 --> 00:11:04,246
One point for every correct answer.
261
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:06,040
Name the noble gases.
262
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:08,375
- Oh, noble gases? We got this.
- Yeah.
263
00:11:08,376 --> 00:11:10,669
- I can't believe you, Marty.
- Courtney, please.
264
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,709
Hey, hey, hey, guys, guys,
can we please focus?
265
00:11:12,710 --> 00:11:15,149
- We need some answers.
- I need some answers.
266
00:11:15,150 --> 00:11:16,819
Why did you tell me
your mom would be fine
267
00:11:16,820 --> 00:11:17,927
not going to the shower?
268
00:11:17,928 --> 00:11:19,595
Because I was trying to
make everyone happy.
269
00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:21,764
Oh, then, well done.
Look how happy everyone is.
270
00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:23,641
Ah.
271
00:11:23,642 --> 00:11:27,520
Argon, radon, krypton,
oganesson. Got them all.
272
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,688
Dave, would you chill?
273
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,107
Can't you see how emotional Tina is?
274
00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:35,199
Yes, uh, but you know what would
make her feel better? Winning.
275
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:37,113
Calvin, uh, number four.
276
00:11:37,810 --> 00:11:40,399
Are you sure that these are
all the Pam Grier movies
277
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:41,575
of the 1970s?
278
00:11:41,576 --> 00:11:44,669
Dave, I told you, I know my Pam Grier.
279
00:11:44,670 --> 00:11:47,269
It was me, Pam and my VCR.
280
00:11:47,270 --> 00:11:48,832
We had a thang.
281
00:11:52,020 --> 00:11:53,046
It was a friendship.
282
00:11:55,670 --> 00:11:57,592
And that's time. Pencils down.
283
00:11:58,690 --> 00:11:59,718
Look at this.
284
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,510
It's a damn travesty.
285
00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:05,641
Marty, we got five blank questions, man.
286
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:07,459
Courtney was distracting me.
287
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:09,369
You could have just made
up some answers, Marty.
288
00:12:09,370 --> 00:12:11,356
Apparently, lies are your specialty.
289
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:14,719
And I had to go to a real dark place
290
00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:17,112
to name all these serial killers.
291
00:12:17,810 --> 00:12:19,030
And for what?
292
00:12:24,035 --> 00:12:26,850
Marty, we need to do
something about this.
293
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:28,759
Okay, don't worry.
294
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,349
I have a solution.
295
00:12:30,350 --> 00:12:33,044
We just give her the baby.
296
00:12:38,640 --> 00:12:41,845
I'm not giving your mom my baby.
297
00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:47,559
Okay, yeah, when you say
it like that, of course...
298
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:51,919
This, uh, might be the
skinny piña colada talking,
299
00:12:51,920 --> 00:12:54,733
but, uh, you guys blow.
300
00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:57,999
Come on, Dave, our rideshare is here.
301
00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,987
- We got to get home to Grover.
- Ooh, Grover.
302
00:12:59,988 --> 00:13:03,459
Furry blue Muppet, debuted
on Sesame Street in 1970.
303
00:13:03,460 --> 00:13:04,760
Booyah.
304
00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:09,179
I bet you didn't expect
to have trivia winners
305
00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:10,720
in your car tonight, huh?
306
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:15,140
And, yes, I did have a piña colada.
307
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:18,739
Ask me if I paid for it. You can ask me.
308
00:13:18,740 --> 00:13:20,909
- Okay, Dave, Dave. Calm down.
- Ask me. Uh, sir?
309
00:13:20,910 --> 00:13:25,540
Sir, sir, I requested a chatty
driver, and I'd like to chat.
310
00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:29,017
Nice night, huh?
311
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:31,894
- Dad?
- Lamar?
312
00:13:31,895 --> 00:13:33,771
Where did you get this car?
313
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,190
It's a loaner.
314
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:37,775
Is this one of the Fusebox cars?
315
00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:39,735
Well, now you're just
jumping to conclusions.
316
00:13:39,736 --> 00:13:41,429
Am I?
317
00:13:41,430 --> 00:13:43,573
These are Fusebox floor mats.
318
00:13:45,110 --> 00:13:47,160
I didn't want to get the car dirty.
319
00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:51,122
A good way to not get it dirty
would be not to steal it.
320
00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:53,319
Steal it?
321
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:55,627
The kids call it a "side hustle."
322
00:13:56,540 --> 00:13:58,779
The owner literally handed me the keys
323
00:13:58,780 --> 00:14:00,381
and told me to take good care of it.
324
00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:01,569
I don't think he meant
325
00:14:01,570 --> 00:14:04,020
- to pick up passengers in it.
- No.
326
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,554
You didn't hear the way he said it.
327
00:14:11,020 --> 00:14:12,101
What happened?
328
00:14:12,102 --> 00:14:14,520
I don't know. The car just stopped.
329
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:15,939
Why?
330
00:14:15,940 --> 00:14:17,679
Don't ask me. It's not my car.
331
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:19,400
Well...
332
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:21,360
When was the last time you charged it?
333
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:22,719
You know, I've been meaning to look up
334
00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:24,389
how often you got to do that.
335
00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:27,249
Hey, morning, Calvin.
336
00:14:27,250 --> 00:14:29,459
Just, uh, dropping off your
new favorite employee.
337
00:14:29,460 --> 00:14:32,459
Yeah. Hey, Lamar, the silver
Hyundai we worked on yesterday,
338
00:14:32,460 --> 00:14:33,789
it's only half charged.
339
00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:35,589
Hmm, uh, charger must be broken.
340
00:14:35,590 --> 00:14:37,029
Yeah, I bet that's what it is.
341
00:14:37,030 --> 00:14:39,449
I'm sure that's what it is.
Has to be what it is.
342
00:14:39,450 --> 00:14:41,239
Happens to phone chargers,
happens to car chargers.
343
00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:42,257
Case closed.
344
00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:45,389
Well-well, didn't we run diagnostics
345
00:14:45,390 --> 00:14:47,386
- on all of the chargers?
- Well, in that case,
346
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,889
could be something else,
could be anything else.
347
00:14:48,890 --> 00:14:50,973
Could be a million things. Yeah.
348
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:53,139
It is a mystery that, frankly,
may never be solved.
349
00:14:53,140 --> 00:14:55,240
In fact, we might as well stop trying.
350
00:14:56,146 --> 00:14:58,089
Yeah, you should definitely stop.
351
00:14:58,090 --> 00:15:01,191
Lamar, would you please plug the
Hyundai up to another charger?
352
00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:02,659
- You got it, boss.
- Thank you.
353
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:04,153
Thanks for covering for me.
354
00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,696
You're a good son.
355
00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:09,329
Yeah, maybe, but I'm a terrible friend.
356
00:15:09,330 --> 00:15:11,800
You know, that's the first
time I've ever lied to Calvin.
357
00:15:12,420 --> 00:15:13,780
I mean, except for the time
358
00:15:13,790 --> 00:15:16,123
that I told him his gazpacho
wasn't too salty.
359
00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:17,599
It was inedible.
360
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,419
It was like eating a bowl of ocean.
361
00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:29,053
Hey, Mom?
362
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:31,430
Can we talk?
363
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,020
Sure.
364
00:15:33,700 --> 00:15:37,229
Just watching home movies,
when things were simple.
365
00:15:37,230 --> 00:15:39,855
Just me and Mama's little babies.
366
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:41,559
Aww.
367
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:43,567
Is that Marty in the school play?
368
00:15:43,568 --> 00:15:47,238
Yeah. He was terrible.
He just stood there.
369
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,658
I was playing a tree.
370
00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,704
Okay. Mom? Uh...
371
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:57,706
I need you to know how sorry I am.
372
00:15:57,707 --> 00:16:00,042
Okay? This whole thing was all my fault.
373
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:01,380
No, it's not, Marty.
374
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:06,006
It all started because I made
an awful, stupid mistake,
375
00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,799
forgetting to invite you.
376
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:11,553
It hurt your feelings,
and I am so sorry.
377
00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:15,559
I guess I could have been a
little more understanding.
378
00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,789
I know what baby brain is like.
379
00:16:17,790 --> 00:16:19,949
One time, I got confused
380
00:16:19,950 --> 00:16:22,300
and put breast milk in Calvin's coffee.
381
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:27,420
- Ew.
- He loved it.
382
00:16:28,112 --> 00:16:30,319
- Ew.
- Ew.
383
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,879
But that's it exactly.
384
00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:34,899
I'm so scattered.
385
00:16:34,900 --> 00:16:37,609
I'm screwing up left and right.
386
00:16:37,610 --> 00:16:40,600
But I don't just want you to
be a part of this baby's life.
387
00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:42,627
I need you.
388
00:16:43,980 --> 00:16:45,337
You do?
389
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:48,006
I do. My mom is 2,000 miles away.
390
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,119
Yeah, and we're both gonna
be working full-time,
391
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:53,012
so we gonna need somebody
to dump this baby on.
392
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,515
You'd dump that baby on me?
393
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,685
Ooh...
394
00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:02,522
- Tina?
- Not now, Gemma!
395
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,499
Uh, but it's an emergency.
396
00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:08,360
I've got clumpy gravy on the stove
397
00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:09,737
and I don't know what to do.
398
00:17:12,120 --> 00:17:15,450
Gemma, I thought we agreed you
would never attempt gravy again.
399
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,536
You don't have what it takes.
400
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:20,873
Okay, before you say
anything else hurtful.
401
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:23,542
Surprise!
402
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:25,179
What is happening?
403
00:17:25,180 --> 00:17:26,359
It's a baby shower.
404
00:17:26,360 --> 00:17:28,229
Well, actually, it's a grandma shower
405
00:17:28,230 --> 00:17:29,882
for our baby's Glammy T.
406
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,467
- That's me.
- Yeah.
407
00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,679
- Here you go.
- Oh, my God... oh...
408
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,933
Look, I know I said I forgave
you earlier, but I was lying.
409
00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:41,853
Now I forgive you.
410
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,314
Ooh!
411
00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:47,319
Ooh, let me steal one of these.
412
00:17:53,980 --> 00:17:56,450
- He knows.
- Who?
413
00:17:56,451 --> 00:17:58,789
Calvin. He's on to us.
414
00:17:58,790 --> 00:18:01,439
I walked past him with a
tray of pigs in a blanket,
415
00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:03,833
and he said, "Let me
steal one of those."
416
00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:07,920
Seems pretty innocent.
417
00:18:08,860 --> 00:18:10,159
Excuse me. Oh, man.
418
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,549
These things are so good,
man, they should be a crime.
419
00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:16,512
They're not that good.
420
00:18:17,260 --> 00:18:19,432
- What are you talking about?
- Stop toying with me.
421
00:18:21,940 --> 00:18:25,329
God, you're like a cat, and
I'm like your little mouse.
422
00:18:25,330 --> 00:18:27,939
Son, it's okay. He's racked with guilt.
423
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:30,559
Calvin, you know that
car that wasn't charged?
424
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:34,350
It's because I drove it for a
ridesharing service last night.
425
00:18:34,360 --> 00:18:37,783
Whoa, whoa. You took a customer's
car from the Fusebox?
426
00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:40,119
You got to understand,
I'm desperate to make money
427
00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:41,409
so I can come around more.
428
00:18:41,410 --> 00:18:44,209
I-I just got my family back
and I don't want to lose them.
429
00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:46,959
But I told Dave to lie to you about it,
430
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,360
and for that, I'm sorry.
431
00:18:48,370 --> 00:18:51,964
Oh, but you're not sorry
about the grand theft auto?
432
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:55,677
That, too?
433
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,260
Look, I'm sorry, Calvin.
434
00:19:02,120 --> 00:19:04,569
You know, Dave, I've never
known you to be a liar.
435
00:19:04,570 --> 00:19:06,687
I mean, you've been a
lot of other things.
436
00:19:06,688 --> 00:19:08,980
A nuisance, a pest,
437
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:13,277
a pain in the ass,
an overtalker, a bad dresser.
438
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,429
But I know if you lied,
439
00:19:19,430 --> 00:19:22,787
then, it must have been
for an important reason.
440
00:19:23,780 --> 00:19:24,871
It was.
441
00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:28,626
All right, I guess this one time,
I'm just gonna look past it.
442
00:19:29,220 --> 00:19:30,460
So I can keep my job?
443
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:31,921
Oh, no. You're fired.
444
00:19:33,381 --> 00:19:35,215
I'm just not gonna call the police.
445
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,385
Okay. Well, thank you.
446
00:19:38,020 --> 00:19:40,579
But I tell you what, I know for a fact
447
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:44,149
that Motor Boys on
Marengo, they're hiring.
448
00:19:44,150 --> 00:19:46,269
And I would be more than happy
449
00:19:46,270 --> 00:19:48,562
to write you a glowing recommendation.
450
00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:50,313
You'd do that for me?
451
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,274
No.
452
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:53,901
He's doing it for me.
453
00:19:54,902 --> 00:19:58,030
No. I'm doing it because
I hate Motor Boys.
454
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:03,161
Feel free to steal everything
under the roof.
455
00:20:04,360 --> 00:20:05,621
I will.
456
00:20:07,860 --> 00:20:09,458
Let's see.
457
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,000
Oh, so sweet.
458
00:20:11,030 --> 00:20:12,319
Now I don't have to say it.
459
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,088
- Yeah.
- Aww.
460
00:20:15,100 --> 00:20:16,499
- So cute.
- Mm-hmm.
461
00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:17,632
Glammy T?
462
00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:18,889
Open this one next.
463
00:20:18,890 --> 00:20:20,719
Ooh.
464
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,638
Oh, my goodness.
465
00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,266
- Ah!
- How cute.
466
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:32,289
Matching sneakers!
467
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:44,629
You know, I've seen Mama
ugly-cry before, but Marty?
468
00:20:44,630 --> 00:20:47,079
Well, he is his mama's boy.
469
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:53,010
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