All language subtitles for The Last Drive-in With Joe Bob Briggs S06E01 Black Christmas 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DD+2 0 H 264-monkee_track4_[eng]

♪♪

♪ Hey, everybody,
have you heard the news? ♪

♪ Joe Bob is back in town ♪

♪ He's over at the drive-in,
hanging around ♪

♪ Watching crazy movies,
so come on down ♪

♪ To Joe Bob's
last drive-in show ♪

♪ Blood, beasties, boobies,
and more ♪

♪ Joe Bob's last drive-in show ♪

♪ It's a spooky good time
with monsters and ghosts ♪

♪ Crazy, kooky fun with
the world's greatest host ♪

♪ Joe Bob's last drive-in show ♪

♪ It's gonna be legendary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's last drive-in show ♪

♪ It's gonna be very scary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's last drive-in show ♪

♪ Let's go! ♪

♪♪

Man: Ho, ho, ho!

[ Static crackles ]

Okay, here we are,
ruining Christmas again.

You know why we do that, though?

So that none of you
go off the deep end

and start killing
your relatives.

Everybody is supposed to be
so gull-durn happy at Christmas

that it's a recipe for suicide,
homicide, fratricide, matricide,

brothercide, sistercide,
and neighborcide.

"Yeah, I got your jingle bells
right here, pal."

So, in order to avoid mayhem
on the Yule,

which now that I think about it,
wouldn't be a bad movie title --

"Mayhem on the Yule,"

starring Clint Howard
as an elf with an Uzi.

Darcy: Whoo![ Laughs ]

World's biggest
Clint Howard fan.

In order to avoidthat,
we always give you

some on-screen violence
to keep a lid on it.

And we're gonna watch
"Black Christmas" tonight...

Yay!...the original one.

Oh.
[ Laughs ]

Darcy the Mail Girl
has been agitating for this

for a long time.

You didn't like it last year

when we did the four-movie
"Phantasm" marathon.

Those are not
Christmas movies.

Well, they had the same spirit
as Christmas movies

is what we thought.

The fans want to see
Christmas horror.

I want to see
Christmas horror.

And you always do
what the people want

because you're chest deep
in that social media,

neck deep
in the social media,

listening to the pulse
of the horror community.

Send Darcy your tweets,
your Instas,

your Facebook posts.
She's all over it.

But mostly Twitter
for the live feed.

If you wanna talk to us tonight,
that's where you go.

You know, the only reason
that people didn't

totally buy the line-up
last year

is that we blew
the final special effect.

We had that "Phantasm"
flying silver ball,

and it was supposed to embed
in my forehead

and spew blood
all over you.

Oh, man.
How cool would that have been?

But instead, it just stuck
in my hat, you know?

Not scary.

We should impale you
on some reindeer antlers.

Oh, man. I've actually tried
that cosplay a couple times.

That original scene from
"Silent Night, Deadly Night"?

With the antlers? Yeah.
I can't get it.

The Linnea Quigley scene
is what we're talking about

where she --
I haven't watched it in a while,

but doesn't she get dropped down
the chimney or something

and ends up with antlers
through her boobs?

No. Not --
Not at all.

Well, that's the way
I remembered it.

Well, anyway, that's what
we should do tonight, though.

Antlers through your boobs
or wherever she was impaled.

Same thing
from that movie.

I am so down.
Okay.

Well, we got
a triple feature,

so I'll talk to you about that
during the movie.

Have you got Linnea Quigley,
like, sexy wardrobe?

I'm pretty sure I could come up
with something.

All right.
Of course you do.

You know, I should
mention this, too.

Blumhouse released the
"Black Christmas" remake today.

It's not a remake.
It's a total redo.

It has practically nothing
to do with the original,

but I think
the only reason they did it

is that they knew we would be
doing "Black Christmas"

on Friday the 13th,

and they were piggybacking
on our publicity!

They have "Black Christmas,"
we have "Black Christmas."

It's dueling
Black Christmases.

But they don't have
a mail girl.

Can't we all be together
for black Christmas?

Yeah. But I wanted
to talk about

Rudolph the Red-Nosed
Reindeer first.

You're in great "Black
Christmas" cosplay, by the way.

Thank you.You are "Black Christmas."

Exactly.
Because
you're Christmasy,

and you got all the black,
you know?

And those are
killer boots.
Thank you.

But did you watch the "Rudolph
the Red-Nosed Reindeer"

Christmas special
when you were a kid?

I mean, I still watch it
every year now.

Oh! Okay, then you probably know
about this article

that came out
in the "Huffington Post"

that has shown us the racism,
and homophobia, and child abuse,

and bullying, and sexism,
and exploitation of the disabled

that lie
at the bigoted heart

of the "Rudolph the Red-Nosed
Reindeer" Christmas special.

No. No idea
what you're talking about.

I actually don't think
the article goes far enough.

I think it's time we got rid of
every holiday tradition

that originated
in the dark ages

of a united
grievance-free country.

But Rudolph
the Red-Nosed Reindeer,

as I will shortly prove,
is not just outdated,

it's a Communist attempt
to turn our children

into substance-abusing
sex slaves.

I think
we should junk that show,

send it to the graveyard
of '60s television,

get rid of Gene Autry.

Let's face it, once that song
gets into your head,

you can't get that song out
for days.

And replace it with either the
Chuck Berry version of the song

"Santa, make him hurry, tell him
he can take the freeway down,"

you know,
or the Joe Diffie version,

"Leroy the Redneck Reindeer."
Do you know that one?

It tells the story
of the reindeer

who drives to the North Pole
in his pickup

wearing overalls
and a John Deere cap.

I've heard that one.You've heard it? Okay.

Because the main advantage
of both of those songs is

right out of the chute,

they get rid of
the whole red-nose thing.

Do you know the origin of the
whole red-nosed reindeer story?

"The Red-Nosed Reindeer" was
written by a Chicago copywriter

named Robert May
as a children's book

for a Montgomery Ward
Christmas giveaway in 1939.

Now, think about it -- 1939.

What happened in 1939?

The Soviet Union invaded Poland

after signing a non-aggression
pact with Hitler!

A rednose?! Hello!
Wake up, people!

Did anybody check Robert May's
party affiliations?

Yeah, let the redreindeer
take over.

Let's do things differently
this year.

Sure there are nine reindeer
pulling the sleigh,

but all the shots are being
called by the dictator reindeer,

the strongman who solves
all our problems for us.

And then there's the fact
that Alcoholics Anonymous

had recently been founded
in Akron, Ohio,

by Bill Wilson and Bob Smith,
two apparently hopeless drunks

who no doubt had the famous
red whiskey nose

popularized by W.C. Fields.

Coincidence?
I think not.

We know what makes a nose glow,
don't we?

And it's not rosacea, and it's
not acne, and it's not the flu.

The guy was a writer.

Obviously, he was a drinker
if he was a writer.

It was one of those
secret-handshake things

that people
in 12-step programs do

so they'll recognize one another

at the West Hollywood breakfast
meeting or wherever they go.

It's obviously a subliminal
entrenched in the story

so that the song says
"Let the drunk speak.

Listen to the drunk,"
in a way that will be accepted

by the youth of our nation.

Would that it stopped there.

I now ask a simple question --

What the fuck
are Reindeer Games?

Has anyone ever seen a reindeer
playing a game?

I suppose we could ask a
Laplander, but I'm guessing no.

All those horns,
all those hooves,

the mixing of genders,

the supple skin
of the sleek does,

the implied sadomasochism when
they lock their antlers together

and toss each other around --

Rudolph is obviously being told
he's not kinky enough

for the big leagues,
if you know what I mean,

and I think you do.

The story is
an elaborate grooming technique,

full of hints
of forbidden pleasures

that because you're socially
awkward and wear glasses,

you're not allowed
to experience...

until Santa tells you
how much he loves your nose.

Now, need I stop here to review
how many times

in the great literary works
of history

the nose has been used
as a substitute

for another male appendage,
not to mention

the persistent belief that a
prominent nose or a hooked nose

or a protruding nose
or any kind of large nose

has the same meaning, in certain
circles, as big feet?

Do you see where Santa is going
with this?

Do you see where Robert May
was going with it?

Do you see where network
television was going with it?

I'm gonna go ahead and say it.

They embedded actual pedophilia

in the DNA
of our Christmas celebration.

They're not just toys, are they?

They're Misfit Toys!

They're broken, they're damaged,
they're misshapen,

they're weird
in one way or another,

but in the hands of Santa,
they become

wondrous,
transformative treasures

that have found their place
in the universe

just like you, little Rudolph...

or Freddie, or Timmy,
or Billy boy.

You need Santa
to reshape you.

Remember the outcast elf
in the story?

Why does the outcast elf want
to be a dentist?

Who gave him that oral fixation?

I can't even go on with this.

It leads us to places
that would shock sex offenders

serving life sentences in the
Texas Department of Corrections.

But I have one last question --

What about Bumble
the Abominable Snow Monster?

If you'll recall, Bumble's goal

is to eat Rudolph's
entire family,

but he's foiled
by Hermey the would-be dentist

who extracts
all his sharp teeth.

Who is Bumble really,
and what does he represent?

Bumble is huge
and Bumble is white.

Bumble obviously exemplifies

the decadent,
entitled bullying Caucasian race

attempting to destroy diversity
and inclusion in this nation,

especially the inclusion
of losers like Rudolph

and Hermey, because Rudolph's
big feetare a threat

to the established social order

and Hermey's
bizarre fixations on the mouth

are destructive to the future
of civilization.

So, the extraction
of Bumble's teeth is

a revolutionary social message,
and that message is,

"Shut up, white guy.
The Reds are in charge now.

We're gonna run Santa
down the freeway

and right over your sorry ass."

54 years of CBS promoting

Communist organizational
techniques

for the North American
Man-Boy Love Association.

Okay, I said it.
I'm disgusted.

Thank God
we finally noticed.

That was one of
your more bizarre rants.

Well, it's Christmas. We gotta
step it up at Christmas.

But I'm serious
about the antlers.

So am I.

All right. Yuki.
Yuki. Yuki!

Yuki Nakamura,
ladies and gentlemen,

the Tokyo Cowboy,

our set designer,
our property master.

Yuki, I need some very sharp
reindeer antlers.

Reindeer antlers!
Yeah.

Do they have reindeer
in Japan?

They have reindeer
in Japan, right?

Yes.
[ Speaks Japanese ]

What?

Japanese reindeer.
[ Speaks Japanese ]

Okay. Well, get me some giant,
sharp [speaks Japanese]

reindeer antlers
and mount 'em on something

so we can impale Darcy
for the big closing effect

of the Christmas special.

Will do.
Okay.

No turning back now, Darcy,
'cause Yuki's on the job.

I'm so ready.
Heck, yeah.

At the end
of the Red Christmas special,

it's now official, Darcy willbe
impaled on reindeer antlers.

Yay!All right, so --

[ Laughing ]

We should probably talk about
the movie, don't you think?

Might be
a good idea.

So, "Black Christmas."

I bet half our audience
has already seen this movie.

This is one of the most
requested titles that we have.

Okay, so, the main thing
about this movie

is the thing we can't talk about
because it's the ending.

And we don't do that
on this show.

But you know how
in film class --

We always have
some professors of film

or filmmakers watching
because I get their e-mails.

But in film class,
they always teach Orson Welles.

They're crazy
about Orson Welles.

And they tell you
one of the greatest single shots

in all of film history
is the opening shot

of "A Touch of Evil"
because the camera moves

for three and a half minutes
in a single take, okay?

Very first shot of the movie.

Well, in this movie,
the last shot inside the house

is a single take
with a moving camera,

and it goes on
for three minutes,

and it's a difficult shot

because this is before
the Steadicam was invented.

And that shot is the whole key
to understanding the movie.

I'm exaggerating.
It actually goes on

for almost three minutes.

But then there's
a shocking image

and then there's
another two-minute pan.

So, it's actually
kind of a five-minute shot.

But the reason
I'm talking about it is

don't think the movie's over
before it's over

if you have not
seen this movie before.

Do not make the mistake
of thinking

that just because
the credit crawl has started,

the movie is over.

All right. A lot of claims
are made for this movie.

They say it's
the first slasher film, 1974.

Not really.

First of all, there's not
that much slashing in it.

Secondly,
when people say "slasher,"

what they normally mean is
deranged serial killer.

That's what they all have
in common, right?

So, any movie where you have
one guy killing everybody,

like, you know,
could technically be called

a slasher film.

And by that definition it is
a slasher,

but it can't possibly be
the first one

because earlier
that same year, 1974,

"The Texas Chain Saw Massacre"
was released.

So, if anybody did the first
slasher, Tobe Hooper did.

Some people say "Halloween" is
the first slasher film.

That's crazy.
That wasn't even until 1978.

But isn't "Psycho"
a slasher film?

Isn't "Blood Feast"
a slasher film from early '60s?

Mario Bava made "Bay of Blood"
three years before this movie.

So, my reaction to all of this
is who cares.

Stop spending so much time
on the Internet, okay?

All right, if you live in
Canada, and you're a film nerd,

you say, "Black Christmas is the
beginning of Canadian horror.

This is the foundation movie
of all Canadian horror.

This is a landmark film
that launched the golden age

of Canadian horror."

Like Canadian horror is a thing!

Have you ever once in your life
called somebody up and said,

"Come on over
to the trailer house.

We're gonna binge-watch some
Canadian horror tonight"? No.

Yeah!You have?! Oh, no.
Come on.

Italian horror, yes.

Canadian horror? Come on.
Really? I don't -- All right.

"My Bloody Valentine,"
I guess, you watched.

That's another Canadian
horror film.

That one you watched?Yes, it's great.

All right. They're always proud
of that one.

I don't think anybody who's ever
watched "My Bloody Valentine,"

though, has said,
"Man do they make great horror

north of the border."

"Class of 1984,"
same thing.
Ooh, see?

And what makes this
especially ridiculous is that

when they do make horror movies
in Canada,

they always try to disguise the
fact they were made in Canada.

Count the number of scenes
in this film

where they show
an American flag.

They want you to think
it's an American film --

a little tiny American flag
sitting everywhere

'cause they want it
to get released in America

'cause population of the
United States -- 325 million.

Population of Canada --
36 million.

So, hello!

Plus the director of the movie
is American, Bob Clark.

Now, he's from Fort Lauderdale.

He did live in Canada
for 12 years.

He's actually
the only person from Florida

I have ever heard of
who went to Toronto for work

and said, "Hey, man, this is
paradise up here. I'm staying."

He had already made two movies
down in Florida,

"Children Shouldn't Play
with Dead Things"

and "Deathdream,"
also called "Dead of Night,"

also called
"The Night Andy Came Home."

Have you seen it, "Deathdream"?

It's about a Vietnam vet

who comes home from the war
as a zombie.

Very dark film.

And this is a very dark film.

One thing about Bob Clark,

he doesn't like to satisfy
the audience.

He likes
to beat up the audience,

mess with your expectations.

All right, he third claim made
for this film,

and you'll see it
all over the Internet,

is that "Halloween"
was planned as a sequel

to "Black Christmas."

This is just ridiculous.

Bob Clark had
a way of telling stories

that made everything sound like
the original idea came from him.

So, he was always telling
this story

of how he met John Carpenter,
and Carpenter told him

how much he admired
"Black Christmas,"

and Bob was flattered,
and Carpenter asked him

if he thought he would ever do
a sequel to it,

and Bob said, no,
he had greater aspirations

in the film business.

He didn't wanna get stuck
in horror.

And, so, Carpenter asked him
what the plot would be

if he did do a sequel,
and he said,

"Well, they would have to
catch the killer

and put him in an asylum
for a year,

and then he would escape and
the killings would start again."

And, so, based on that,

Clark implied that Carpenter's
script for "Halloween"

was based on Clark's sequel idea
for "Black Christmas,"

which doesn't even make sense
because Michael Myers

in the opening scene
of "Halloween"

is six years old, so, obviously,

he hasn't been in an asylum
for years.

Of course, those of you who
haven't seen it have no idea

what I'm talking about right now

because you don't know how
"Black Christmas" ends,

and, of course, we won't be
talking about that

because that would piss you off.

So, but we've got a whole lot
of stuff to talk about

involving this film,
so let's get started

with the drive-in totals.

We have...

...no breasts, which is strange

for a sorority house movie,
you know?

With Drive-In Academy Award
nominations for Olivia Hussey

as the pregnant sorority sister,

Margot Kidder as the alcoholic
foul-mouthed sorority sister,

Andrea Martin as the
frizzy-haired sorority sister,

Marian Waldman
as the whiskey-chugging

comic-relief house mother,

Keir Dullea
as the emotionally fragile

concert-pianist boyfriend
with a turtleneck and a mullet,

and Bob Clark, the director,
for doing it his own way.

Three stars.
Joe Bob says check it out.

They're gonna come after me.

I know you're gonna come after
me for that three-star rating.

There have been four --
count 'em --

four-documentaries devoted
to this one film.

And each documentary
makes more claims for the movie

than the one before, you know?

It's the movie that made
"Halloween" possible.

It's the movie that invented
the killer point-of-view camera.

It's the movie that invented
the movie camera, you know?

The movie that invented film.

There was no film
before this movie.

Didn't Hitchcock
make a whole movie

that was 100% POV camera?

"Rope," right?
"Rope."

Point-of-view camera was not
exactly a new thing in 1974.

Oh, yeah, the movie that was
the first to show women

as they really are,
talking about sex and abortions

with the same freedom
and independence as men.

Which is idiotic because
the movie came out in 1974,

we'd had seven years since the
Summer of Love in San Francisco.

Is someone under the impression

that women were shy about sex
or language during those years?

Geez.

"Black Christmas," the movie
that invented Christmas.

There was no Christmas
before "Black Christmas."

I like the movie,
but let's get a grip, people.

[ Laughs ]

♪♪

[ Static crackles ]

[ Bell tolling ]

♪ Silent night ♪

♪ Holy night ♪

♪ All is calm ♪

♪ Savior, our Lord ♪

♪ Shine in heaven ♪

♪ High above ♪

♪ Watching over us ♪

♪ Holy child ♪

♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪

♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪

♪ Hallelujah ♪

[ Dog barking ]

♪ Silent night ♪

[ Dog barking ]

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Man breathing heavily ]

[ Woman laughs ]

[ Laughter ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Laughter ]

Hey, who left the goddamn
front door open?

[ Man breathing heavily ]

Man: Uh-oh. Look out.
It's big Barb.

[ Leaves rustling ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Ah, yes.

Oh, by the way,

how come I was the only one
there working tonight?

We were there
this afternoon, Barb.

A likely story.

How does it look?

Yuleish --
very Yuleish.

Have you got
your Santa Claus suit ready?

Yeah. What time
do the little bastards arrive?

About 1:00.

Terrific.

[ Telephone rings ]

Hello?

Pardon?!

Who?!

Barb, it's for you --
long-distance.

Oh, great. Hang on.
I'll take it in the other room.

[ Man breathing heavily ]

[ Dog barking in distance ]

[ Footsteps ]

Could you guys
shut up in there?!

I can't hear a damn thing!

Hello?

Mom, hang on.
I can't hear you.

[ Receiver clicking ]

Operator, I can't hear what's
coming from the other end.

Can you -- Yeah.
Fine, okay.

Woman: Party's over.
Come on. All the men out.

Come on. Bye-bye.

No, operator.
I still can't hear.

Hi, Mom.
Yeah, I can hear you now.

No, we're just having
a little party.

No, I've had a couple.

Oh, come on.
I'm not drunk.

No. No. Um, I have some stuff
to do in the afternoon.

And then I was just gonna get
the 7:20 train into the city.

Woman:
Good night! Bye!

[ Laughter ]

Oh, come on.
You've got to be kidding.

Well, why
can't I come, too?

Well, who the hell is he?

Good night.

You're a real gold-plated whore,
Mother. You know that?

See you next week.

Okay.

Hey.
Call before you come.

I'm gonna have to
get my parents used to this.

I'll just get a couple of
my friends, and we'll go skiing.

Okay.[ Horn honks ]

Yeah, sure, Mom. Fine.
I'll see you around.

Man: Hey, Chris, wait up.
I'll give you a ride.

[ Engine turns over ]

Woman: Put the Christmas music
back on.

[ Door closes ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

♪ Hark, the herald angels sing ♪

Anyone want to go skiing
for a few days?

Yeah, sure, Barb.

My mother's taking a place
up at Mount Holly.

Does anyone else
want to come?

Yeah.
Sounds like fun.

Great.
How about you, Clare?

Uh, no, thanks, Barb.
I've made some other plans.

[ Scoffs ]

[ Telephone ringing ]

I'll get it.
It's probably Peter.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

Hey, quiet!

It's him again --
the moaner!

♪ Glory to the newborn King ♪

Shh.

[ Man breathing heavily ]

[ Groaning ]

[ Screaming ]

[ Gagging ]

[ Laughing ]

He's expanded his act.

Could that
be one person?

No, Clare, that's
the Mormon Tabernacle Choir

doing their annual
obscene phone call.

Shh.

[ Screaming ]

First...

I can...

Let me stick...

[ Laughing ]

[ Gagging, snorting ]

[ Laughing ]

You...

big cunt.

You big cunt.

You big cunt.

[ Strained voice ]
Let me lick it.

Lick it! Lick it!

Let me lick
your pretty piggy cunt!

[ Laughing ]

[ Normal voice ]
Pretty pink cunt.

Pretty pig cunt!

I'll make your pretty pink clit
hum like a tuning fork, baby.

Not bad.

Suck on my juicy cock!

I'll come over and --

I'll come over, and you can --
You can suck it!

Listen, you pervert, why don't
you go over to Lambda Chi?

They could use
a little of this.

You piggy cunt.
You want my fat cock.

Oh, why don't you
go find a wall socket

and stick your tongue
in it.

That will give you
a charge.

I'll stick my tongue
up your pretty pussy!

You fucking creep!

I'm going to kill you.

[ Dial tone ]

♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪

Well, super tongue
strikes again.

Fastest tongue
in the West.

That was sick.

I really don't think

you should provoke somebody
like that, Barb.

Oh, listen.
This guy's minor-league.

In the city,
I get two of those a day.

Maybe, but, you know,
that town girl was raped

a couple of weeks ago.

Darling,
you can't rape a townie.

Phyl: You really
are too much, Barb.

Oh, come on.

This is a sorority house,
not a convent.

I'll see you later.
I'm gonna go pack.

[ Moans ]

Come on, Clare.
She didn't mean anything.

No, really, Jess.
It's okay.

I have to finish packing,
anyway.

Hasn't she had enough trouble
fitting in here

without you getting at her
all the time?

Come on. I know a professional
virgin when I see one.

Mrs. Mac: Hey,
can I get a hand out here?!

Speaking of
professional virgins,

here we have the Queen
of Vaudeville, circa 1891.

Hi, Mrs. Mac.
Where have you been?

I've been shopping.

You know, I think the stores
must take tacky lessons

this time of year.

I never saw
such a bunch of junk.

Come in the other room.
We've got a surprise for you.

Come on, girls.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

There you are.

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Cat meows ]

Where have you been?

Mrs. Mac's been looking
all over for you.

Ooh, hello, puss.
Hello.

Go on, now.
I've got some things to do.

Now, let's see. Hmm.

[ Mumbling ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Cat meows ]

[ Strained meowing ]

Claude?

[ Claude meowing ]

Is that you, puss?
Here, kitty?

Who is that?

Who is it?

[ Claude meowing ]

Claude?

Who is that?

Who is it?

[ Screaming ]

[ All talking ]

Oh, girls,
it's really beautiful.

[ All talking ]

And the color and everything.
No, it's really lovely.

I've got about as much use
for this as a chastity belt.

Oh, come on, Mrs. Mac.
Put it on.

Put it on? Oh, come on.
I'm not going to bed.

Come on, please?

Put it on?

Anything for you girls,
because it's Christmas.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Clapping in distance ]

[ Applause ]

Okay, girls. Party's over.

Let's get this joint
cleaned up.

Oh, yeah. Come on.

Everybody
take a little something.

It won't take long.

That's it, girls.
Just a little cooperation.

Barb:
Someone took my drink.

Mrs. Mac: That's all right.
It will be all right.

Let's just get you up,
'cause you're tired.

You really are.
Good night.

[ Laughter ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

"B" for...

"Booze."

There you are.

Mmm.

Good night.Good night.Good night.

Good night, Jess.Good night, Jess.

Woman:
Merry Christmas.

Jess, you girls
are just too good to me.

Oh, nonsense, Mrs. Mac.

[ Telephone ringing ]

Hello?

Peter: Hello.
Is Jess there, please?

Yeah.
Wait a second, Peter.

Jess, it's for you.
It's him.

Hello?

Hi.
How was the party?

It was good.
Too bad you couldn't make it.

I've been practicing
for four days straight.

I'm really,
really wiped out.

Yes, I know.

Jess, dear, you won't
forget to put out the lights?

You've got to find some time.
I've got to talk to you.

You sound funny.
What's the matter?

Nothing's the matter.
I just want to talk to you.

Why don't you
tell me now?

Because I want to talk to you
face-to-face.

Jess, I haven't been to bed
in three nights.

I'm just not in the mood
to be playing games.

Look, Peter, we'll talk about it
tomorrow, okay?

Okay. I'll be in room 30
all day.

All right.
I'll see you around 2:00.

I didn't mean
to sound short with you.

I -- I guess
I'm just exhausted, okay?

Yeah. It's okay.

I love you.

I know.
See you tomorrow.

Yeah.
Well, good night.

[ Receiver clicks ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Humming ]

[ Humming stops ]

[ Inhales deeply ]

[ Swishes ]

[ Spits ]

Jesus, I wouldn't wear this
to have my liver out.

Clare?

Clare?

[ Rocking chair creaking ]

Man: ♪ Little baby Bunton ♪

♪ Daddy's gone a-huntin' ♪[ Knock at door ]

♪ Gone to fetch a rabbit skin ♪

♪ To wrap his baby Agnes in ♪

[ Bell tolling ]

[ Footsteps ]

[ Bicycle bell dinging ]

[ Vehicle approaches ]

[ Horn honks ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

[ Laughter ]

Oh, thank you.
It's okay.

Sorry,
I should have been

keeping
a better watch on them.

Think so?

Yeah, well,
I said I was sorry.

Excuse me?

I hate to bother you.

I can see
that you're busy.

But I wonder
if you could help me.

You see,
I was supposed to

meet my daughter here
at 1:00.

It's -- It's half past now,
and she's still not here.

Her name's Clare Harrison.
Do you know her?

Clare Harrison?
Yeah, I think so.

I know she lives
in a sorority house.

Uh, it's -- it's called, um...
Pi, uh, Kappa Sig.

Oh, of course.

Yeah, well,
Kappa's our sister sorority.

Some of the girls
are over here today,

but I haven't
seen Clare.

Their place isn't far.
I'll tell you how to get there.

Ho, ho, ho, shit.

Santa, please.

Look, she's supposed to be
going away

with me for the weekend,
God damn it.

Well, we decided

that we would go skiing
for a few days.

Yeah, and I've been
looking forward to this

for three weeks.

Bitch.

Isn't Santa naughty?

Ho, ho, ho, fuck.

Mrs. Mac: I just don't know,
Mr. Harrison.

Her clothes are all packed
and ready to go.

I'll bet you'll find her over
at the common room.

They're having a party
there today

for underprivileged
children.

Yes, I know.

I'm very disappointed
in this atmosphere.

I intend to do something
about it.

Who's this?

Uh, uh,
that's a friend of Clare's.

A very nice young man
from the town.

Chris Hayden.

I didn't send my daughter here
to be drinking and...

picking up boys.

Oh, Clare's a good girl,
Mr. Harrison.

I wouldn't want you to
get the wrong idea about that.

She is a good girl.

I'm sure you'll find her
at the fraternity house.

As a matter of fact,
I could show you the way.

I-I have to go to a store
near there.

If you wouldn't mind
giving me a lift.

I know where it is.

But I'll be glad
to give you a ride.

Uh...

Ahh.

This is very kind of you,
Mr. Harrison.

I'll just get my bag.

"I didn't
send my daughter here

to be drinking
and picking up boys."

Tough shit.

I'm supposed to
be responsible...

for the morals of every girl
in this goddamn house.

These broads would hump
the Leaning Tower of Pisa

if they could get up there.

I do my best.

I don't know
what the bastards expect of me.

Christ sake.

[ Claude meows ]

Claude?

Is that you, Claudie kitties?

Claude?

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty,
kitty, kitty.

Come on, Claude.
Come say goodbye to Mommy.

[ Claude meows ]

Is that you, Claude?

Oh, Jesus, Claude!
Look what you made me do!

[ Groans ]

Come on, Claude.

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty,
kitty, kitty.

Come on, Claude.
I've got to go.

Here, kitty!

Oh, God damn it, Claude,
you little prick!

This is very kind of you,
Mr. Harrison.

Think nothing of it.

[ Children playing ]

[ Dog barking ]

[ Static crackles ]

And so it begins,

with the first victim
of the point-of-view camera.

[ Chuckles ]

The movie starts out with that
extended subjective camera shot

where the killer is climbing
up the trellis

on the outside
of the sorority house,

and there was no Steadicam.

The Steadicam is
a couple of years away,

and, so, the camera operator,
Bert Dunk,

built a special body brace

that had a hinge
and a safety belt on it

and a pad down the front

and a device so that he could
tilt the camera up and down

while it was mounted on his head

so that he could
crawl up trellises

and move up and down staircases

and show the point of view
of the killer.

Now, I don't think it was
the first time a movie used

a subjective camera to show
the killer's point of view,

but it was the most ambitious
use of that device

up till that time, and if
John Carpenter stole anything,

that's what he stole.

By the time "Halloween" came out
four years later,

they had a better camera,
and it was easier to do.

They had a gyroscope.

But think about it --
the one thing you can't reveal

in a horror film is
who's doing the killing.

You see shadows. You see shapes.

Most horror films.

So, instead,
you turn the camera around,

and you show everything
through the killer's eyes.

Now it's almost a cliché,
they do it so often.

But not so much in 1974.

Probably the most recognizable
face in the cast today

is Margot Kidder,
as the foulmouthed,

frequently drunk
sorority sister,

but this was long before
she broke out in "Superman"

as Lois Lane,
so she was just hired

because she had been
in Brian de Palma's "Sisters."

I think she was Brian de Palma's
girlfriend at the time.

And she was available,
and she was Canadian.

She grew up in Yellowknife,

in the frozen tundra
of northern Canada,

and they were trying to use
as many Canadians as possible

to get those Canadian
tax credits.

And as we know, Margot Kidder
would eventually have

one of the saddest
movie-star lives ever,

full of drugs, alcohol,
bankruptcy,

two terrible car accidents,
overdoses, homelessness,

paranoia, schizophrenia,
bipolar disorder,

and eventually suicide,
but she was passionate

and outgoing and well known
to a lot of people in Hollywood

at this time in her life
even though she'd done

only a few very tiny roles.

The producer remembers that when
she was picked up every morning

to go to the set, she was kind
of disheveled and hung over.

And then she mostly
cracked jokes on the set,

but talked very seriously
about how she was determined

to marry Paul McCartney.
So, I don't know.

She didn't really like
horror films.

Her other great horror role,
"The Amityville Horror" --

She called that movie
a piece of shit.

Literally. That's a quote.
"Piece of shit."

And the frizzy-haired
sorority sister

is played by Andrea Martin,

who was a last-minute
replacement for Gilda Radner.

Andrea was a veteran
of Second City,

the improv comedy troupe
in Toronto,

which is where this was filmed,

and she's still famous today
as a Broadway stage actress,

winner of Tony Awards,

has a huge number
of both film and stage roles.

All right, what do we know
about the killer thus far?

He likes cellophane,
he's pretty damn physically fit,

and he can sound like a man,
a woman,

a little boy when he makes
obscene phone calls

that are so intriguing,
that the whole sorority house

likes to listen to them
as a group.

Who does that?

Okay, roll the film.

But, you know,
I have a question.

I have a question.

I have trouble understanding
all the words

in the obscene phone calls,

and I would like to understand

all the words
in the obscene phone calls.

So, does Billy say,
"I want to lick your pink cunt,"

or does he say "I want to lick
your pigcunt"?

'Cause that seems like
an important plot point,

especially if you're
an FBI profiler or something.

'Cause "pink cunt" --
lonely guy, possible pedophile.

"Pig cunt" --
hates women, right?

Might like chubby girls,
you know?

Would you agree? Anybody?
I'm quoting the movie!

Or I think I'm quoting
the movie.

Maybe he's saying "pimple,"
you know?

Like "I wanna lick your pimple,"

which would be, in a way,
even grosser.

But, okay, I'll stop.

[ Static crackles ]

♪♪

[ Static crackles ]

[ Piano playing ]

[ Horn honks ]

Jess:
I'm pregnant.

[ Piano stops ]

Peter: What?

I'm pregnant.

Jess,
that's fantastic.

I don't want it.

You don't want it?

No.

I'm gonna
have an abortion.

You can't
make a decision like that.

You haven't even
asked me.

I wasn't
even gonna tell you.

Jess.

I want us
to have a baby.

Peter, I can't.

Oh, Christ, Jess.

Don't you ever
consider anyone but yourself?

I've thought this out
very carefully,

and I know
what I'm gonna do.

Do you know how important
this afternoon is to me?

Yes, I do.

Why don't you
just get out of here.

[ Footsteps departing rapidly ]

Jess?

I want to talk to you
tonight.

There's nothing
to discuss, Peter.

I think there is.

I'm not
gonna change my mind.

We'll see.
Will you be there at 9:00?

Yes.

Okay,
I'll see you tonight.

[ Door closes ]

Yes, dear. No,
I'm sure there's nothing wrong.

Yes. I've just been talking
with a friend of hers.

She's gonna call around
for her.

You want some more,
huh?

Yes, well,
if we don't have any luck,

I'll go to the police.

[ Laughs ]

Yes.

Well, I don't think
we'll be home tonight.

It's a bit late
to head out now.

I think the little bugger's
snoggered.

Son of a bitch.

Yeah, goodbye, dear.

You are, aren't you?

[ Telephone ringing ]

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?!

Oh, hell. Not again.

[ High-pitched voice ]
Billy!

Billy?

Oh, I'm sorry.
You have the wrong number.

[ Deep voice ]
But your mother and I

must know where he is.

Where did you
put the baby?

You've got
the wrong number.

Where did you put Agnes,
Billy? Billy?

Look, I'm telling you,
you have the wrong number!

[ High-Pitched voice ]
But your mother and I

must know where he is.

Billy!

[ Receiver bangs ]

[ Railroad bell ringing ]

Barb: You guys can never
get it together.

Phyl:
I really don't think

you're taking this
as seriously as you should.

Mr. Harrison:
We may appear alarmist.

Now, hold it.
Hold it. Jesus.

Could you just give it to me
one at a time?

Well, what the hell are
you planning to do about it?

You, shut up.

You know,
for a public servant,

I think your attitude
really sucks.

[ Indistinct talking
on police radio ]

Shut up.

Now, Mr. Harrison,

if you're convinced
your daughter is missing,

you can fill out
one of these forms.

I don't know
if it's any consolation,

but 90% of the time

girls are reported
missing from the college,

they're at a cabin somewhere
with a boyfriend.

Thanks.

But that's not
much consolation.

Oh, here, Ms. Mac.
Let me help.

Thank you, dear.

We've got to get Mr. Randals
to fix this door.

I must have
called that son of a bitch

100 times about it.

Oh, Ms. Mac,
there was another one

of those calls just now.

Oh, was there, dear?

It was weird.

Some woman screaming,
then a man wailing.

And Clare Harrison's father
was here today.

Oh, really?

I'm sorry I didn't
get to say goodbye to her.

Well, you still might.

Clare didn't meet him
where she was supposed to.

Uh, I thought she went over
to the fraternity.

Where is it?

Those bottles don't drink
theirselves, for God's sake.

Eureka.

Shit.

[ Clattering ]

[ Telephone rings ]

Excuse me?

Mm-hmm.

Could you give me the number
at the sorority house?

Please?

Yeah, sure.

It's, uh...

fellatio, 2-0-8-8-0.

What?

Fellatio.

It's a new exchange --
F.E.

That's a new one on me.

How do you spell it?

Capital "F, "E,"
little "L,"

L-A-T-I-O.

Thanks.

Don't mention it.

[ Indistinct talking
on police radio ]

[ Pucks crashing ]

Chris!

Hold it!

Hi. What's up?

Have you seen Clare
today?

No, she went home.

No, she didn't.
No one knows where she is.

Are you serious?

I thought
maybe she was with you

or you might have
heard from her.

No,
not since last night.

Well, her father came
to pick her up at 1:00 today,

and she didn't show.

So, he went down
to the police station

with Phyl and Barb.

What happened?

They didn't
take it seriously.

Why?

I don't know.

I think they figured
she was shacked up somewhere.

[ Piano playing ]

Well, um, she's out
for Christmas holidays,

but there was
a band practice

over at the high school
this afternoon,

and -- and,
Janice plays the clarinet.

And, uh...

When she didn't come home,
I phoned melody Green.

That's her...best friend.

And, uh,
they hadn't seen her all day.

She's only 13 years old,
lieutenant.

And...my husband's a trucker.
He's out on the road.

So I came over here.

Yeah, well,
is it really so unusual

for her just to be
a few hours late, Mrs. Quaife?

Oh, yes. She should have
been home at noon.

We were gonna
buy a present for her father.

Nash,
you stupid son of a bitch.

You've got
a big goddamn mouth.

What the hell
are you talking about?

Ken: Hi, Chris.
How's your brother?

Ken,
I've got to talk to you.

What's up?

I want to know
why nothing's being done

about Clare Harrison
being missing

and why this idiot
gets away

with saying
the things he does.

You're a friend
of Clare Harrison?

Yeah,
I've been taking her out.

Oh, this is Jess, Ken.

She lives in the same
sorority house as Clare.

All right. Come on in.

Sergeant, bring me the file
on the Harrison girl.

And take care of this.

[ Telephone rings ]

Mrs. Mac:
I do wish you would try

to eat something,
Mr. Harrison.

You know,
starving yourself

isn't gonna
help the situation at all.

No, thank you very much,
Mrs. McHenry.

But I just
have no appetite.

I feel I should be
doing something,

but I don't know what.

Well, why don't you
just try to stop worrying?

The best thing you can do
is stay right here.

I'm sure she'll call
or show up soon.

Mr. Harrison: If I could just
know what to do.

[ Slurring ]
Did you know --

This is a very
little-Known fact --

But did you know

that there's
a certain species of turtle --

That -- There's
a certain species of turtle...

that can screw for three days
without stopping.

You don't believe me,
do you?

Well, I mean, how could
I make something like that up?

Uh...

Barb, dear...

Uh, I -- I --

No, really.

They do it for 3 days,
24 hours a day.

[ Exhaling sharply ]

Can you believe that?
Three days?

I'm lucky
if I get three minutes.

Do you know
how I know this?

Because I went down to the zoo,
and I watched them.

It was very boring.

Well, actually,

um, I, uh, didn't stay
for the whole three days.

I went over,
and I watched the zebras

because
they only take 30 seconds.

[ Laughing ]
Premature ejaculation.

[ Laughing ]

[ Coughing ]

You think it's my fault,
don't you?

Barb, stop it.

Don't shit me.

That's what
you're all thinking.

Why don't you just
come right out and say it?

You think
that I drove her away.

And if she's dead,
you're gonna blame me.

Barb, for God's sake.

Well, if that's
what we're all thinking,

why doesn't someone
just come right out and say it?

Barb, dear, you've had too much
to drink. Mr. Harrison --

I don't give a shit
about Mr. Harrison!

I'm sick and tired
of everyone in this house

insinuating stuff

and not coming out
with what they mean!

Why don't you go upstairs
and lie down for a while.

Shut up,
and you leave me alone!

God damn you!

You think it's my fault,
don't you?

You've been implying it
all afternoon.

Barb, you're drunk.
Go to bed.

Yeah, sure. Fine.

[ Creaking ]

[ Crash ]

Any news?

Yes.
Where's Mr. Harrison?

Uh,
he's in the dining room.

[ Siren wails in distance ]

[ Dog barking ]

We won't be long,
Mrs. Mac.

All right, dear.
Uh, Phyl...

Phyl, listen. I'm sure
Clare will be all right.

I hope so.

And I just
want to tell you

that I'm gonna go to my sister's
for the holiday,

so I might not be here
when you get back.

That's okay.

Just check in on Barb before
you leave. Could you do that?

Of course I will.
And you bundle up.

We'll be all right,
Mrs. Mac.

Ken: Mrs. Quaife
and Mr. Harrison have asked me

to extend their thanks to you

for coming out
on this cold night to help.

Now, Mrs. Quaife has told us

that Janice most likely
came through this park

on her way home
from school today.

So the first thing we'll do
is comb the park.

When I tell you,
I want you all to assemble

on the South edge of the park
with your assigned officer,

and then we'll just
walk through the park.

Spread out evenly.
Don't bunch up.

They will be two sets of dogs
leading the way.

Just spread out
and follow them.

Sergeant Kime,
stay out of the flanks.

The fumes
will mess up the dogs.

And don't go
more than 10 miles an hour,

or you'll be no use to us.

Now, if any of you
find anything,

I want you to send someone out
immediately to report it to me.

Is that clear?
Are there any questions?

Okay, let's go.

[ Engine turns over ]

[ Dogs barking ]

[ Dog barking ]

♪ Alligators
come through the gate ♪

♪ But goodbye leg
if you get away late ♪

♪ Lollies always love to pop ♪

[ Horn honking ]

All right! I hear you!

[ Claude meowing ]

Claude?

Claude?

Claude?

Claude?

Claude?!

[ Claude meows ]

Claude?

Where are you?

[ Creaking ]

[ Claude meows ]

Claude?

[ Wind howling ]

How did you get up
in the attic, Claude.

Sheesh.

[ Horn honking ]

All right, God damn it.
You can wait.

[ Hatch creaks ]

Claude, are you up here?

Jesus Christ, I don't see
how he could be up here.

Claude?

[ Yelps, groans ]

Jesus, Claude,
now look what you made me do.

I snagged myself.

Oh, Jesus, I've got to clean
this place up one of these days.

Claude?

Claude?!

I can't see a damn thing.

Claude?

God damn it, Claude,
I'm gonna have you fixed.

[ Gasps ]

[ Man grunts ]

[ Wind howling ]

[ Gasps ]

[ Screaming ]

[ Gasping, gagging ]

Hey!

Anybody there?!

Anybody there?!

[ Exhales sharply ]

[ Door creaking ]

[ Man breathing heavily ]

[ Engine turns over ]

[ Screaming ]

[ Glass breaking ]

[ Screaming continues ]

[ Static crackles ]

♪♪

Doug McGrath, who plays the cop
who doesn't know

what fellatio is
said at a convention

that he really was not sure
what it meant in real life,

and, so, he decided just not to
ask the director what it meant

and play the scene that way.

I think it's some indication
of how Latin has declined

in the Canadian schools,

or maybe just that Doug doesn't
pay close attention.

But at another convention,
John Saxon,

who plays the police lieutenant,

said he had a discussion
with the director, Bob Clark,

about the proper pronunciation
'cause John thought it should be

"feh-lah-she-oh,"
which is probably the way

they say it in Italy
where Latin was invented.

But John is Italian,
which doesn't make sense

because the name "Saxon" would
imply that he's Saxon.

So, what the fuck is
going on there?

But can there really be
this much ignorance

about fellating in general
in a film made in 1974?

Anyway,
we've got a lot of drunkenness

and rage in this movie.

We've got a drunk housemother,

we've got random kids who bean
Mr. Harrison in the head

with a hard snowball,
we've got a music student

who destroys a grand piano
with a mic stand.

And just when we thought
the killer was gonna

wipe out the sorority house,

we've got
a missing 13-year-old girl

out there somewhere.

And that IS John Saxon

orchestrating the search
for the missing girl.

And that was the very first
scene they shot

when they made the movie,

and John Saxon had gotten
off a plane from L.A.

two hours before
they shot that scene.

Now, how he got the role is
a sad story.

But it's Christmas, and that's
when we tell sad stories,

so I'm gonna go ahead
and tell the sad story.

The police lieutenant was
supposed to be played

by the legendary Edmond O'Brien.

Edmond O'Brien accepted the
part, flew to Toronto

to start filming two days
before the start of production,

but Bob Clark and the producer

met his plane
the night he arrived,

and he came off the plane
in a wheelchair.

But he then stood up,
and they thought,

"Okay, well, he's fine.
He's just a little weak,"

but then it took him 45 minutes
to put on his coat.

They were going out to dinner.

So, halfway through the dinner,
he says,

"I have to go up to my room,"

because he thought he was
in his hotel,

but he was not in his hotel,
he was in a restaurant.

He also didn't know
what city he was in.

He couldn't remember Toronto.

It was obvious he was having
frequent memory lapses.

It was the beginning
of Alzheimer's disease,

and so they had to tell him
that he couldn't do the part,

especially since
the first night of shooting

was gonna be
in freezing-cold weather,

and he just seemed
too frail for it.

So, when they told him,
he immediately burst into tears.

He was devastated.

He was trying to hold it
together, he said.

He begged them.

He said he could remember
enough lines to do the part.

This was just two days
before the beginning

of principle photography,

but fortunately John Saxon
was available.

He was willing to fly to Canada
on a moment's notice,

so from the time
John Saxon got the call

until the time he was actually
doing a scene was just 48 hours.

But the story gets sadder
than that.

Edmond O'Brien had
a 9-year-old son,

and the 9-year-old boy
had seen his dad off

from the L.A. airport,
and he was telling him,

"I know you can do it, Dad.

You're gonna do great
in this part,"

because apparently the kid kind
of sensed something was wrong,

and he was rooting
for his dad.

So, we now have this picture
of the young boy

pushing his dad's wheelchair
to the gate

because he wants his dad
to succeed and be happy

and get what he wants,
and then Edmond O'Brien

has to go home
and tell the kid he got fired.

Awful story.

Anyway, this is not one
of my favorite John Saxon roles,

but he's been in everything
from "Running Wild,"

one of those "wild youth" movies
from the '50s,

to Mario Bava's "Evil Eye,"

to "Blood Beast
from Outer Space,"

and he's probably best known
as Roper

in Bruce Lee's great
"Enter the Dragon,"

which he made right before
doing this movie.

He's been in everything.

Okay, here's how
"Black Christmas" happened.

It started out as a script
written by a Canadian

named Roy Moore
called "The Babysitter,"

or in some accounts,
"The Babysitter Murders."

Roy worked at
the Canadian Broadcast System,

and he wrote a story based on
an urban legend called

"The Babysitter
and the Man Upstairs."

Now, this is a story that
impressionable teenage girls

used to tell each other
when they were babysitting

about getting calls
from a weird voice who says,

"Check the children,"
and then hangs up.

You can read various versions
of the story on the Internet.

It is very creepy.

Well, Bob Clark was intrigued
by the script,

but he started
making changes to it.

He changed the title to
"Stop Me."

Okay, "Stop me!" is what
the Illinois serial killer

William Heirens used to write
on the mirror with lipstick

at his crime scenes.

Does anybody remember
William Heirens?

He's not one of
the more famous serial killers,

but they called him
The Lipstick Killer.

And, actually,
now that I think about it,

Bob Clark was a film buff.

He would have known about
The Lipstick Killer

from that 1956 Fritz Lang film
"While the City Sleeps,"

which was based
on a book about Heirens.

Vincent Price was in that movie.

And you know who played the
Lipstick Killer in the movie?

Drew Barrymore's father,
John Drew Barrymore.

Can anybody keep
the Barrymores straight?

I think you have to say all the
names -- John Drew Barrymore.

Anyway -- All right,
major digression.

So, Bob Clark uses
the title "Stop Me."

See, I know where I am
at all times.

I can always go back.

And he changed the setting
from babysitters

to a sorority house
because he wanted to get rid

of children in the story,

and he changed quite a few
other things, as well.

He added
the Margot Kidder character,

he added
the alcoholic house mom,

he incorporated elements
from a series of real murders

that had occurred
around Christmastime

in the Westmount section
of Montreal.

I was just there,
as a matter of fact,

in the Westmount section
of Montreal,

because that's where you have to
go to get the famous bagels.

Part of the experience is
they're mean to you

when you ask for a bagel,
you know?

They're sullen, like, "Yeah,
maybe you can have this bagel

if you don't act like
a stupid American.

Stand over there."

Okay, that's a digression
within a digression.

But I think the serial killer
in Westmount

possibly could have worked
at the bagel place,

they were that mean.

So, anyway, the real reason
this movie would seem to be

linked to "Halloween"

is that the original title
of "Halloween" was

"The Babysitter Murders,"
because they were working

from the same urban legend.

That was actually the specific
instruction that the producer,

Irwin Yablans,
gave to John Carpenter.

It has to be about
murdered babysitters,

therefore giving rise
to another urban legend,

that "Halloween" is a sequel
to "Black Christmas."

Okay, so, once he gets
his script ready,

and he gets funded
for a $641,000 budget,

which included
some government money --

I actually heard him refer
to his budget as $400,000,

so I think the $641,000 one was
Canadian dollars.

But he starts looking around
for who to cast

as the lead sorority girl,

and he decides to make an offer
to Olivia Hussey,

who was a huge star at the time
ever since she made her debut

at age 15 as Juliet in Franco
Zeffirelli's "Romeo and Juliet."

Very serious actress, worked
on the London stage a lot,

always did high-toned movies
like "Death on the Nile,"

"Last Days of Pompeii,"
"Lost Horizon," "Ivanhoe."

In other words, about the last
person you would think

would wanna go to Toronto
in the middle of winter

and make a cheap horror movie.

Fortunately for Bob Clark,

Olivia Hussey
frequently consulted psychics

about what she should do
with her life,

and one of these psychics told
her that she was going to Canada

for the first time, and
she was going to make a movie

that would make
a great deal of money.

And this happened
a couple of days

before her agent sent her the
script for "Black Christmas."

So, she said yes.

And because she said yes,
other big stars said yes.

Keir Dullea had starred
in "2001: A Space Odyssey,"

and he was still known for that,

and so when he was sent
the script,

they told him he would be
opposite Olivia Hussey,

and he said yes right away.

And they didn't care
about his age, either.

I think he may have set
the record for older actors

playing college students.
He was 38.

But almost all his scenes
are with Olivia Hussey as Jess.

All right,
way too much information.

Let's get back to the flick.

Bob Clark.

Bob had one of the strangest
careers in the history of film

in terms of what kind
of movies he made.

His most financially successful
film was "Porky's,"

but he also made
the beloved Christmas classic

"A Christmas Story," you know?

He made "Murder By Decree"

with Christopher Plummer
and James Mason.

He made "Tribute"
with Jack Lemmon.

He actually worked with some of
the biggest stars in the world.

And then he also made two of the
worst movies in history.

"Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2"
and "Rhinestone,"

Sylvester Stallone goes
to Nashville, becomes a singer,

and falls in love
with Dolly Parton.

"Rocky Goes Country."
It still gives me chills.

That movie will actually destroy
part of your cerebral cortex.

It just withers away a little
bit every time Sly sings.

[ Static crackles ]

♪♪

[ Static crackles ]

[ Dog barking ]

I'm gonna have to split.

Peter's coming around,
and I'm late already.

My gosh, it's cold.

Yeah. I'll be
coming home soon, too.

I'm freezing.

Okay, see you.

We'll let you know
if anything happens.

[ Woman screaming ]

[ Dogs barking ]

[ Screaming continues ]

Jim, is --
is that my baby?

Wait.

Janice!
Janice! No!

Janice! Janice!

Janice!

Janice! Janice!

Janice!

Janice!

[ Telephone ringing ]

Hello?

[ Man groaning ]

Hello?

[ Screaming ]

Who is this?

[ Whispering ]
Help me.

Please stop me.

Oh, God,
please help me.

[ Whimpering ]

What do you want?
Why are you doing this?

[ Screams ]

Filthy Billy!

I know you're there,
nasty Billy!

You answer me this,
Billy!

Who are you?

For God's sake,
what are you doing?

I know what you did,
Billy!

Stupid Billy!

Billy! Billy!
Billy!

Stop this!

[ Mumbling ]

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Mrs. Mac?

Mrs. Mac, are you home?

Mrs. Mac, are you up there?

Yes. Hello?

I've been getting
obscene phone calls.

I want to know
what can be done about it.

Yes. All right, I'll hold,
but only for a moment.

[ Gasps ]

Peter, Jesus,
you scared the hell out of me.

Why didn't
you say something?

Yeah?

Well...you scared
the hell out of me, too.

What was
all that yelling about?

I was upstairs
having a little sleep.

I hope you don't mind,

but it got a little cold
out there waiting for you.

I'm sorry I was late,
Peter.

Yeah.

Clare Harrison
is missing.

I was out with a search party,
looking for her.

Yes. Hello?

How noble.

I want to
report something.

No,
I don't want to hold!

How did the recital go?

How do
you think it went?

Peter, what kind of a game
are you playing?

I thought
you wanted to talk.

So why don't you
quit attacking me,

and we'll try to have
a rational, adult conversation?

Yes,
now stay on the line.

Okay.
Now, calm down, lady.

Let's have the story.

Oh, yeah?
What's the address?

6 Belmont Street.

How many calls?

Well, did you
call the phone company?

Oh, yeah?

Well, miss,
we're very busy here.

There's been
a child murdered in the park.

I don't know
when we can get a man on it.

It's probably
just one of your boyfriends

playing a little joke.

Yeah, well,
I'll report it

and try to get a man on it
just as soon as possible.

I'm sorry, miss.

[ Sighs ]

[ Indistinct talking
on police radio ]

[ Sighs ]

Jess, what's wrong?

A little girl
was found murdered in the park.

What?

The search party
that was looking for Clare

found a little girl
murdered.

Clare's still missing.

Well,
Clare's all right.

Is she?

Now, listen, Jess.
I know you're upset.

But I've got
something to tell you.

What?

I'm leaving
the conservatory.

Peter...

Just hear me out.
[ Sighs ]

Will you hear me out,
please?

Now, I've lived in one room
for eight years,

and I'm tired of it.

I'm tired of having to
line up behind six people

every time
I want to take a bath.

I've had it.

I'm quitting the conservatory,
and we're getting married.

Well, say something?

Do you remember
when we first met?

You told me about your
wanting to be a concert pianist,

how it was
your greatest dream.

And I told you
about some of the things

that I wanted to do.

I still
want to do those things.

You can't ask me to drop
everything I've been working for

and give up
all my ambitions

because your plans
have changed.

Be realistic.
I can't marry you.

Sure you can.
What does it change?

We could be married.

You could still do anything
you wanted to do.

Peter,
I don't want to marry you.

All right.

What about the baby?

I didn't want to bother you
with it, sir.

Oh, you didn't?

6 Belmont Street.

That's where
your daughter lives?

Yes, it is.

A high-School girl's
been murdered.

Mr. Harrison's daughter
is missing.

And now at the house
where she lives,

the other girls
are getting obscene phone calls.

[ Telephone rings ]

Don't you think
we ought to look into it, Nash?

Well, lieutenant, I guess.
Uh, sure.

Thank you, lieutenant.

Yeah. Thanks, Ken.

[ Sighs ]

[ Telephone rings ]

What the fuck?

[ Laughing ]

[ Chuckling ]

[ Laughing ]

Sergeant Nash, could I speak
to you for a minute?

Yeah.
Sure, Lieutenant.

[ Laughter ]

What's this?

Oh, that's the number
at the sorority house.

Fellatio?

Yeah.
It's a new exchange -- F-E.

New exchange?

[ Laughs ]

Yeah, fellatio.

One of the girls
that was in this afternoon

gave it to me.

She gave it to you?

Yeah.

Nash, I don't think
you could pick your nose

without
written instructions.

[ Laughing ]

I know. It's something dirty,
ain't it?

[ Laughing ]

[ Chuckling ]

[ Glass breaking ]

You selfish bitch.

You're talking
about killing our baby

as though you were having
a wart removed.

Now can you see
why I didn't want to tell you?

What the hell
are you trying to do to me?

What are you doing
to yourself?

Jess...

Let's get
one thing straight.

You are not
going to abort that baby.

Peter,
you're not gonna tell me

what I can and cannot do.

Jess, if you try
getting an abortion --

I think
you had better leave.

If you try
getting an abortion --I said, "get out."

You're gonna be
very sorry.

[ Dog barking ]

Hi, Peter.

I'll get Jess.

Jess, are you okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.
Any more news?

No, but there's
some people here

to see
about the phone calls.

Jess, this is Lieutenant Fuller
and -- I'm sorry.

Graham.
Bill Graham.

Are you the person
who called the station today?

Yes.

We'd like to put a tap
on your phone,

but we'll need
your written permission,

if it's okay with you.

You can go ahead. I'd like to
see Clare Harrison's room.

Where's the telephone?

There's one in the living room
and one here in the hall.

Clare's room's up here.

How many girls
live in this house?

Well, usually 10.

[ Sighs ]

Hello, this is lineman Graham
at 6 Belmont.

I'm working line 559-6114.

Right.

It sounded to me
like a call from a woman

that I thought
was the wrong number,

but then
she started screaming at me.

Well, who was the last one here
to see miss Harrison?

I think I was.

When, approximately?

Last night about 10:30.

Is this the way she left
her room, as far as you know?

Yes.

What's this?

We were having
a party last night.

Does she drink a lot?

No. Hardly at all.

Does she have
any emotional problems,

anything like that?

No, not Clare.

Who was she seeing,
besides Chris Hayden?

No one.

Are you sure
of that?

Well, so, you were
the last one to see her,

sometime
this morning?

Last night.

Right, last night.

Well, did anyone see her
this morning?

No.
I didn't.

And all the other girls
have gone for the holidays.

Can I get a list
of their phone numbers

where I can reach them?

Sure, there's one
in Mrs. Mac's room.

Who's Mrs. Mac?

She's the housemother.

Uh, is there anyone else
in the house right now?

Uh, yes, another girl --
Barbara Coard.

She's upstairs, asleep.
She's not feeling too well.

Is she the one
that was at the station today?

Yeah.

Yeah, well,
we'll let her sleep.

Okay.

Were there any deliveries,
uh, yesterday?

Was anyone working
in the house,

anything like that?

No, I don't think so.
Mrs. Mac would know.

Is her sister's number
on this list?

Graham, how's it going?
Are you about finished?

Yeah,
what I've done is

I've tapped this phone
so that when it rings,

it will ring
at the station house, too.

I'll be
at the phone company,

checking on the location
of the source of the call.

Are there any other phones
in the house?

Yes,
the housemother --

Yeah,
but it's another number,

and there haven't been
any calls on it.

You're gonna
have to keep this guy

on the line
as long as possible.

We've got a mechanical system
here, and it takes awhile.

Uh, girls,
can I show you something?

See the car outside?
We've got one of our men in it.

So you've got nothing
to worry about.

Yeah, sure.

[ Dog barking ]

[ Engine turns over ]

[ Static crackles ]

Keir Dullea
as the unhinged Peter,

seething about his unborn baby.

You know, that's not a very good
candidate for a murder suspect

because I don't think
a serial killer

would be pro-life, ya know?
[ Laughs ]

And we know Olivia Hussey is
the final girl.

Of course this was many years
before the rules of final girl

were established,
but we know she's the star,

and she's the one
in constant mortal danger,

and so it would be a stretch
to think Keir Dullea

would kill her
because he would have to kill

his baby at the same time.

Although he did look crazy when
he destroyed that grand piano.

All right, some technical
background things.

There are quite a few obscene
phone calls in this movie,

as you've noticed,
and they all have

multiple voices,
multiple sounds.

They're very complicated
obscene phone calls.

Those calls were mostly voiced
by Nick Mancuso,

who stood on his head
while he was doing them

in order to compress his thorax.

I couldn't make that up,
could I?

And then some
of the grossest lines

were added by Bob Clark himself,
so his voice is on there, too.

And then there are three other
actors and actresses on there,

and then the voices were
distorted in post-production.

Now, Bob Clark claimed to have
a whole detailed backstory

for Billy the caller.

And I say "claimed" because Bob
claimed a lot of things

and could be a little bit
of an exaggerator.

But the way he tells it is that
Billy was abused as a kid,

so he abused his sister
and killed his parents,

and his voices are both himself
and his dead sister Agnes.

But the ultimate idea is that
there's a confusion

inside Billy,
multiple personalities,

violence competing
against itself.

So, Nick Mancuso is the voice
of Billy. "It's me, Billy."

[ Laughs ]

The screaming and yelling part
is Bob Clark.

And then the other interesting
thing about the soundtrack is

the musical score
by Carl Zittrer.

Not much music in it.

He used things like clocks and
toned wind, whatever that is.

He put forks, combs, and knives
next to the strings

of an upright piano
so he would get weird sounds.

He said
he got the creepiest sounds

from those little shrimp forks.

And then when he played back
the so-called music,

he would do it
on a reel-to-reel tape

so that he could put his hands
on the tape

and manually slow it down
and distort it,

creating what some think is
a creepy effect

and some think is just annoying.

But he got the idea
of the forks, combs, and knives

from John Cage.

Do you guys know
who John Cage is?

Avant-garde composer?

If you ever get invited to
a John Cage concert, stay home.

By the way, they were gonna show
this movie on NBC

in January of 1978
as a movie of the week,

but two weeks
before it was scheduled,

Ted Bundy broke into a Florida
State University sorority house

and killed two of the girls and
assaulted three more of them.

So, they pulled it
off the schedule,

and they held it back
for a few months

and changed the name of it on TV
to "Stranger in the House."

It was Elvis Presley's
favorite movie.

Steve Martin also --
saw it 27 times.

It has a strange attraction
for a lot of people.

But at its first release,
it was a total flop.

Warner Brothers changed
the title from "Black Christmas"

to "Silent Night, Evil Night,"

because they were afraid
that the word "black"

would make people think it was
a black exploitation movie.

Warner Brothers
also hated the ending.

They wanted Bob Clark to change
the ending, but he refused.

The reviews were horrible.

The video was out of print
for a decade.

But there's this strange thing
that happens

when an Internet campaign
brings a movie back

into the public consciousness.

The fact that it failed
when it was first released

makes it a "forgotten gem."

They bring me these movies
all the time at Shudder.

"Have you seen this one,
Joe Bob?

It's a neglected classic."

And what they mean is
a film from the '70s or '80s

that bombed at the box office
or, in some cases,

never got released at all.

And they never say,
"Joe Bob, the movie was so lame,

it never got distribution,"
they always say "forgotten gem."

Blu-ray release coming up.
Arrow Video.

'Cause they know people go crazy
for that idea.

"What?!
A forgotten movie?!"

Okay. Now, "Black Christmas"
is not a forgotten gem

because it was
never totally forgotten,

but the cult following
didn't happen

until around the year 2004.

It was just gathering steam
when Bob Clark, sadly,

got killed in a car crash
on the Pacific Coast Highway

when a drunk driver crossed
the center line

and hit him head-on.

And his 21-year-old son was
in the car at the same time

and also died.

Another really sad story.

But it's Christmas, and that's
the time for...sad stories.

At least on "The Last Drive-In."

And here comes
Darcy the Mail Girl.

Darcy, do you have
any sad stories?

I mean, who doesn't?
But I don't dwell on them.

All right, well, we're gonna
dwell on them tonight.

We're gonna tell
sad Christmas stories,

and then we're gonna hire
a homeless guy to sing

"Chestnuts Roasting
on an Open Fire,"

and everybody's
gonna cry.

That's the go-to song
during Christmas season

on the New York City
subways.

You get a lot of money

for "Have Yourself
a Merry Little Christmas."

But the main thing
we're gonna do later

is you're gonna be impaled
on reindeer antlers.

I am so ready
for that.

You say that now.

Okay, back to the movie.

Or we'll just make you go
to a John Cage concert.

That'll make you sad.

Have you ever heard
of a composition called

"Four minutes,
33 seconds"?
No.

Okay, well,
that's a John Cage composition

where the musicians go up
on the stage

with their instruments,

and then for four minutes
and 33 seconds,

they don't play
their instruments.

It's just silence.

That sounds awful, and I think
you're making that up.

You've obviously
never been

to the Brooklyn Academy
of Music.

It's some kind of
Zen Buddhist thing.

You're supposed to
be listening hard

for the music
that's about to come,

but the music
never comes.

[ Laughs ]

No wonder Carl Zittrer
loved John Cage.

Foreshadowing.

That's a spoiler.No it's not. No it's not.

It kind of is.

All I said is that
the music never comes

at a John Cage concert.

It's getting
kind of weird here.

[ Static crackles ]

♪♪

[ Static crackles ]

[ Sobbing ]

I just know Clare is dead.
I can just feel it.

Oh, come on, now, Phyl.
We don't know that.

Poor Mr. Harrison.
I feel so sorry for him.

Hey. Hey.

How's Chris?

Oh, he's okay.
You know Chris.

[ Sniffling ]

Oh, God.

I'm sorry, Jess.

[ Exhales sharply ]

[ Blows nose ]

I guess
I'm just exhausted.

I've been taking
these pills for my cold,

and they knocked me out.

[ Sighs ]

Will you be okay
if I go up to bed?

Yes, of course.

Are you sure?

Yes.
Go up and get some rest.

Call me
if there's any news.

I will.

Thanks.

Good night, Phyl.

Good night.

[ Dog barking ]

[ Door closes ]

Yeah. Everything clear
on your end yet?

Okay. Sure. Uh, yeah.

Now, look, I'm gonna need
about 10 more minutes?

Now, be sure
you tell those people again.

They've got to keep this guy
on the line.

Right.

'Cause he hasn't worn his hat
for the last two days?

Yes, we certainly
will look into that.

Thank you very much.

Jesus.

Graham is nearly ready
at the switching station.

Now, when the phone rings
at the house there,

this one will ring,
too.

The transmitters
have been removed,

so we won't pick anything up
on this end.

Great. Thanks.

Lieutenant, the men are here
from Scarborough.

Okay.

[ Rocking chair creaking ]

[ Man breathing heavily ]

[ Mumbling ]
Little baby Bunton,

daddy's gone a-Huntin'.

Gone to fetch a rabbit skin.

[ Whimpering ]

A rabbit skin.

[ Creaking ]

[ Typewriter keys clacking ]

[ Indistinct talking
on police radio ]

[ Creaking ]

[ Breathing heavily ]

[ Creaking ]

[ Sighing ]

[ Gasping ]

Barb,
what's the matter?

[ Gasping ]

Take it easy. Relax.
You'll be okay.

It's okay.

It's okay.

[ Gasping ]

[ Sighing ]

I guess -- I guess --

I guess
I had a nightmare.

[ Gasps ]

I dreamed a stranger
was coming in my room.

[ Sighs ]

I guess that's
what gave me asthma, huh?

Take it easy.

It's all right now.
Just relax.

♪ Oh, come all ye faithful ♪

♪ Joyful and triumphant ♪

♪ Oh, come ye ♪

♪ Oh, come ye to Bethlehem ♪

♪ Come and behold him ♪

♪ Born the King of angels ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come let us
adore Hi-i-i-i-m ♪

♪ Christ, the Lord ♪

♪ Sing, choirs of angels ♪

[ Man breathing heavily ]♪ Sing in exultation ♪

♪ Sing, all ye citizens ♪

♪ Of heaven above ♪

♪ Glory to God ♪

♪ In the highest ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Christ, the Lord ♪

♪ Yea, Lord, we greet thee ♪

♪ Born this happy morning ♪

Hey.
Hey, it's me -- Billy.

It's all right, Agnes.
It's all right.

Shh. Pretty Agnes.

♪ Word of the father ♪

Just don't you tell
what we did, Agnes.

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh, come ♪

♪ Oh, come let us adore him ♪

[ Barb moaning, gasping ]

♪ Christ, the Lord ♪

[ Wind howling ]

Jean?

What's up?

Jean, get the children
in the car.

What's going on?

Please, just get them
into the car!

Okay, kids. Let's go.

Come along, children.
Hurry.

Miss? Miss?

Thank you.
Merry Christmas.

There was a little girl murdered
over in the park tonight.

[ Telephone ringing ]Yes, I heard.

Your phone's ringing.

Man On Police Radio:
44. Cruiser at 354.

Oh, yes. Excuse me.
Good night.

Certainly. Good night.

Testing.

Man: Phil Graham, trace calls
coming in on front nine.

[ Telephone rings ]

Hello?

[ Moaning ]

Hello?

Who's there?

[ high-Pitched voice ]
[ Crying ] Don't, Billy!

Don't!

[ Man shouting ]

[ high-Pitched voice ]
No, Billy!

No, Billy!
No, Billy!

[ Crying ]

What your mother and I
must know is...

[ Machinery humming ]

...just like having
a wart removed!

Oh, my God.

[ Dial tone ]

[ Telephone rings ]

Hello?

Jess,
we didn't get it.

It wasn't enough time.

You'll have to keep him
on the line longer.

I see.

When you said,
um, "oh, my God,"

did you recognize
something?

No.

I guess it was just
kind of getting to me.

Uh,
when he called before,

did he use more than one voice
like this?

Yes. Yes, he did.

He used several
different voices.

I meant to ask you tonight,
uh, who was the guy

that was leaving
when I arrived at your house?

[ Telephone rings ]

My boyfriend -- Peter.

Were you having a fight?

Man: Ah! Too slow.

Jesus Christ!

Where the hell
were you --

Jess, I'm gonna have to
call you back in a little while.

Are you all right?

I'll call you back
in a little while,

and we'll get him
next time.

Bernie?
Call the doctor.

I'm not letting
no son of a bitch

trespass on my land
in the middle of the night!

What the hell
is going on here?

He fired
on a police officer.

You're goddamn right!
I'd do it again, too!

The bastard
was trespassing!

Halkin got an assful
of bird shot.

I'm gonna make
the son of a bitch

pick every one of them out
with his teeth.

The next time, you're gonna get
the gun up your ass...

Sideways!

If you laugh, Buchanan,

I'll bust you to boy scout,
I swear.

[ Chuckling ]

If you think
it was Peter,

then why didn't you
just tell the police?

Well, because
I'm not really sure.

Well,
they should be stopped.

Whoever it is
should be stopped.

God, Jess, I haven't had
a minute's sleep around here,

there's been so much noise
in the house.

What the hell
was all that yelling about?

Barb had an asthma attack.
She was having a nightmare.

Is she all right?

Yeah, she's fine.
She's sleeping now.

He repeated
almost Word-For-Word

what Peter
said to me tonight.

Couldn't it just be
a coincidence?

Oh, God, Phyl,
I don't know.

I'm so confused.

Oh, look, Jess, I really don't
think it could be Peter.

You know
I don't like Peter much,

but I don't think
he's that sick.

I can't believe
Peter would do this.

He's so gentle
most of the time.

Oh, God, Phyl, you know,
I'm really getting scared.

Look, are you sure
that cop's still out there?

Yeah, he's there.

[ Telephone ringing ]

Hello?

Peter: Jess?

Yes.

[ Crying ]
Oh, God, please help me.

Peter, don't cry.

We can straighten
things out.

There's nothing
to get so upset about.

[ Telephone rings ]Yeah?

It's Bill Graham.
You want me to trace that one?

Yeah.
Try and get it.

Right.

Jess -- Jess,
we can't kill the baby.

Please, Jess, we can't --
can't kill the baby.

[ Machinery humming ]

Peter, where are you?

Please, Jess.

You know how I feel
about the baby.

Don't do this.

Jess,
don't hurt the baby.

Stop this, Peter.

You want our baby.
I know you do.

I don't want to
hurt the baby.

Peter, please tell me
where you are.

[ Machinery humming ]

Shit!

[ Dial tone ]

I'm sorry!

Yeah, the calls
just aren't long enough.

Right.

[ Telephone rings ]

Yes.

Jess,
Lieutenant Fuller.

Want to tell me
what that's all about?

You listened to that?

Yes. What did he mean
about killing the baby?

Jess, it's important
that you tell me.

I'm pregnant.

I told him I didn't
want to have the baby.

When did you
tell him this?

Today.

Just today?
You're sure.

Yes.

"We can't kill
the baby."

That's a strange way
of putting it.

Peter's an artist.
He's very high-Strung.

Neurotic, maybe?

No.
No more than a lot of people.

Jess, are you telling me
the truth?

I've got a feeling you're
holding something back from me.

Now, I don't want it
to be Peter,

but if it is,
he needs help.

Do you know what I mean?
The sooner, the better.

Now, look.
Think back.

Was Peter with you
any of the times

that you got
one of these calls?

Yes.

Yes, he was here!

He was at the house tonight
when the first call came.

That's right.
It couldn't be Peter.

Phyl, it couldn't be Peter!
He was here!

Well, he's obviously upset
about something.

I'd like to talk to him.

Can you tell me
where I might reach him?

Well,
he lives at Baker house.

But when he gets like this,
he usually goes down

to the recital hall at the
music conservatory and plays.

Look, Jess,
if you get any more calls,

you're gonna have to keep him
on the line longer.

You're not giving us enough time
to get a trace.

I'm trying.
You know, it really upsets me.

I know. Of course.

Look, you're doing fine.
I'll talk to you later.

Okay.

Thank God.

I knew
it couldn't have been Peter.

Well,
what can I tell you?

Covered
the entire campus area.

We're working our way
toward the lake now.

Where do we go
from there?

Start them out
on the South end of town.

Have them work their way through
town on a House-To-House.

[ Dog barking ]

Jess! Do you want one aspirin
or two?

Two, please.

Okay.

[ Siren wailing in distance ]

[ Dog barking ]

Jess! Jess!

What are you doing?

It's some kind
of a search party.

Yes?

Sorry to scare you,
miss,

but we're with
the search party.

What do you want?

Well, we wondered if you'd seen
anything peculiar tonight.

Not until
you got here.Phyl.

Well, they scared
the shit out of me.

Sorry, miss,
but you do know

there was a girl killed
in the park tonight.

We're just helping the police
to look for the killer.

Well,
we'd ask you in...

But our dog died
last night.

Oh. Well, we don't
want to bother you

at a time like that.

We were just wondering

if you'd noticed anything
suspicious here tonight.

Oh, no. Sorry.

Well, you just keep your doors
and your windows locked,

and you'll be safe.

Remember, there might be others
from the search party around,

so don't be afraid.

We'll be around to see
that you're safe.

Just remember to lock
those doors and windows, now.

Good night, now.

[ Rolls tongue
obscenely ]

I'd rather face
the killer.

[ Laughs ]

Seriously, do you realize
this is the only door and window

in this whole house
that's locked?

Nash.

Get the Dean of admissions
on the phone.

Tell him I want all records
on a Peter Smythe --

Music student.

And have a car meet me
out front.

[ Knocks on door ]

Barb?
Are you awake?

Man: Agnes.

Phyl?

Are you there?

Phyl!

[ Telephone rings ]

Hello?

[ Deep voice ]
You pig.

You fat pig.

You pig.
You bitch pig.

Hum like a tuning fork,
baby!

[ high-Pitched voice ]
No! Billy, no!

[ Moaning ]

No!
[ Screaming ]

[ Machinery humming ]

Billy! Billy!

[ Deep voice ]
Where's the baby?

Where's Agnes?
You left Billy alone with Agnes!

[ high-Pitched voice ]
Billy!

[ Deep voice ]
Where's the baby?!

Where's the baby?!

[ Machinery humming ]

[ Footsteps approaching ]

Lieutenant,
that guy's on the phone again.

[ Indistinct shouting ]

I know you're there!

You answer me
this minute!

[ Groaning ]

[ high-Pitched voice ]
Mommy!

Come here!

Mommy!

Where's Agnes?!

[ Maniacal laughter ]

[ Deep voice ]
Agnes!

[ Screaming ]

Mommy.

There's the baby.
Baby all right, Mommy.

This is Graham.

It's group 140,
terminal 55.

♪ ...Gone a-Huntin' ♪

♪ To fetch
a rabbit skin ♪

♪ To wrap
his baby Agnes in ♪

[ Dial tone ]

Nash:
Lieutenant Fuller?

Yeah, Nash,
what is it?

The phone company's
on the other line, sir.

They say they got a trace
on this one.

He says the calls are coming
from number 6 Belmont Street.

For Christ's sakes, Nash,
you got it wrong.

That's where the calls
are going into.

That's where they're
coming from,too, sir.

Shit.

Jennings.

Jennings?

Jennings?

[ Dog barking ]

Jennings.

Jennings,
where the hell are you?

Nash.

Nash!

Yes, sir.

Look, I can't get through
to Jennings.

I want you
to call that girl.

Nash, be calm.

Don't tell her that the guy
is in the house.

Just tell her to put down
the phone

and walk straight out
the front door.

I'll be there
in five minutes.

And, Nash, if you blow this,
I'll kill you.

[ Static crackles ]

So, why do I think that leaving
Sergeant Nash in charge

while he's still trying
to figure out

the meaning of fellatio
is not gonna work?

Well, the movie did get a whole
lot more Christmasy,

though, didn't it?

That Margot Kidder kill scene --

mutilated
with a crystal unicorn.

That's the only really explicit
payoff scene in the whole movie

'cause Bob Clark prided himself
on frustrating the audience.

He was even quoted one time
as saying, "I don't pay off.

I don't do reaction shots.
I don't do kill shots."

And this may be another reason

aficionados of horror
love the film

Because they think less
is better.

Here on "The Last Drive-In,"

we never think less is better,
Mister Professor.

Monsieur Cinema Guy.

As I said before, Margot Kidder
didn't really like the movie.

She didn't really
take it seriously.

She'd had only been acting
for five years,

and, actually, she didn't
really take acting seriously.

Her first film was
a lame Norman Jewison comedy

called "Gaily Gaily"
and then the main reason

she got the lead in "Sisters"
is that Brian de Palma

was her boyfriend.

She tended to fall in love
with her fellow artists.

And she was very hippie
in her lifestyle.

She got married
to one of her directors,

Thomas McGuane,
after he directed her

in "92 in the Shade."

And then she became Lois Lane,
and then, when she should have

been at the peak of her career,
she just fell apart.

And I have to tell the story

because what do we do
at Christmas?

Class?

We tell sad stories.
That's what we do at Christmas.

So, she suffered from paranoia
her whole life,

but that eventually turned into
bipolar disorder.

She faked her death one time

because she believed people
were trying to kill her.

She ends up homeless
on the streets of L.A.

She was in two bad car accidents

that left her unemployable
and bankrupt.

She went through substance abuse

and many different kinds
of mental disability,

and she ended up living
in Livingston, Montana,

population 7,000.

But that makes sense
because she was born

in the frigid little town
of Yellowknife

in the Northwest Territories
of Canada.

But she liked pills,
and she liked alcohol.

And she died in May of 2018
of suicide.

Okay, now that everyone is
in the Christmas spirit

[chuckles] we're back to the
brilliant concluding chapters

of "Black Christmas."

Oh, wait, before we do that.
Before we do that.

It's obvious
from some of the social media

that people don't know how big
of a star Keir Dullea was,

the guy who played Peter.

Keir Dullea grew up in Greenwich
Village in New York City.

He did a lot of summer stock.

He trained at the famous
Neighborhood Playhouse.

He worked in live TV drama
in New York City,

made his film debut
as a scarred gang member

in "The Hoodlum Priest" in 1961.

But his breakthrough role was
"David and Lisa," 1962.

I don't think anybody watches
"David and Lisa" much anymore,

but that was a famous movie
in its day.

Keir Dullea was the man
who can't stand to be touched.

What do you call that?

Haphephobia or hapnaphobia

or hasselhoffaphobia
or something.

But he's in love with
a schizophrenic in the movie.

And Keir Dullea also played
the Marquis de Sade

in the movie "De Sade," 1969.

He was good, but they had

some of the lamest orgy scenes
ever filmed.

I mean, if you're gonna make
de Sade, make de Sade.

But the high point of his life

was as the astronaut
Dr. David Bowman

in Stanley Kubrick's
"2001: A Space Odyssey."

He was the star of
that whole thing, top billing,

and Kubrick had hired him
without an audition

based on seeing him
in an Otto Preminger movie

called
"Bunny Lake is Missing."

That's how famous he was.

Hard-core theater guy --
dozens of stage credits.

Still acting today
at the age of 83.

And shame on you
so-called horror fans

who don't know John Saxon!

John Saxon was born in 1935,
still working today.

Grew up in Brooklyn, Italian,
studied with Stella Adler,

started in a TV show called
"Medic" at the age of 16.

He broke out in a movie called
"Running Wild"

as a juvenile delinquent,

frequently worked in Italy
'cause he spoke fluent Italian.

He was in Mario Bava's
"Evil Eye."

He starred in
"Blood Beast from Outer Space."

He played a lot of Indians
and Mexicans

because of
his swarthy good looks.

He's been in everything,
but for my money,

his crowning achievement
was Roper

in "Enter the Dragon," 1973.

Okay, sometimes I feel like

I'm teaching remedial
makeup classes here.

Are we done? All right.
Roll the movie.

And I thought the child choir
was a nice touch.

"Oh Come Let Us Adore Him"
while Margot Kidder is

getting eviscerated
with a crystal unicorn.

And we don't have to be sad when
we think about Margot Kidder.

You know, 'cause this is 1974.
She's fine.

She's running around barefoot
in Topanga Canyon,

deliriously happy
with Brian de Palma.

They were smoking bud and
meditating and frolicking.

There's lots of frolicking
in Topanga Canyon.

Blissfully unaware
of her future suicide.

Sorry, I have to do that
'cause it's Christmas.

[ Static crackles ]

♪♪

[ Static crackles ]

Phyl?

Phyl, where are you?

Please answer me.

[ Telephone ringing ]

Hello?

Nash: Who is this?

It's Jess.

Miss Bradford,
this is Sergeant Nash.

Are you the only one
in the house?

No.

Phyl and Barb
are upstairs asleep. Why?

All right.

Now, I want you to do
exactly what I tell you

without asking
any questions, okay?

But --

No questions.

Now, just put the phone
back on the hook,

walk to the front door,
and leave the house.

What's wrong?

Please, Miss Bradford.
Please just do as I tell you.

Okay.

I'll get Phyl and Barb.

No, don't do that, Jess!

Jess...the caller
is in the house.

The calls are coming
from the house.

Jess!

Jess, get out!

Don't go up there!

Don't go upstairs,
Jess!

Miss Bradford!

Miss Bradford!

Miss Bradford?

Miss Bradford?

Barb.

Phyl.

Phyl!

Barb!

Oh, please answer me!

Phyl! Barb!

Please answer me!

Please answer me!

Please!

Oh!

[ Breathing heavily ]

Barb?

Phyl?

[ Doorknob rattling ]

Man: Agnes.

Agnes, it's me --
Billy.

Agnes.

Agnes, don't you tell
what we did, Agnes.

[ Screaming ]

[ Crashing ]

[ Screams ]

[ Screaming maniacally ]

[ Screaming stops ]

[ Footsteps receding ]

[ Door opens, closes ]

[ Breathing heavily ]

[ Sirens wailing ]

Peter:
Jess, are you there?

Jess?

Jess,
are you all right?

Jess?

Jess,
are you in there?

Jess?

Jess?

[ Glass crackling ]

Jess?

Jess?

Jess, is that you?

Jess,
are you in there?

Jess?

Jess, is that you?

Jess.

Why didn't you answer me?

What was
all the yelling about?

Jess, you had me worried.
What are you doing down here?

[ Sirens wailing ]

[ Tires screech ]

[ Jess screaming ]

[ Crashing ]

Fuller: Jess?

I knew it.

I knew it in my gut
it was that kid.

Nash: Why would Peter
start killing people?

I don't know.

He must have made a call
after --

After each murder.

It's hard to believe
Jess would kill anybody,

much less Peter.

Doctor: She's under.

How long do you think it'll be
before I can talk to her?

Just a couple
of questions.

Well, she'll be out
for at least four hours

and pretty groggy
after that.

What time
do her parents get here?

Couple of hours.
They're driving from Unionville.

I'll stay with her
till then.

But the condition
she's in,

I wouldn't count
on talking to her

before tomorrow afternoon,
if I were you.

Has anybody notified
Patrick Cornell?

Who?

Phyl's boyfriend.

Man: Do you want us to check
the attic and the basement?

Man #2:
Don't touch anything till
the state lab guys get here.

Lieutenant, we're gonna
have to take these bodies

to the morgue
in Lincolnville.

The hospital
doesn't have facilities

to handle this many
at one time.

Tell the coroner to get started
on the autopsies right away.

And notify the parents
for identification.

I think that about wraps
everything up here, sir.

The state lab guys will be here
in about an hour, they said.

[ Indistinct talking ]

Um, reporters, sir.
And the television-News guys.

They want pictures.

Get them
the hell out of here.

Tell them I'll meet them
down at the station.

[ Indistinct talking ]

Reporter: Is the Bradford girl
being charged, lieutenant?

All right, you guys,
come on. Back off.

Yes, the girl's father
is upstairs, but he can't --

Doctor: Would you
keep it down, please?

We've got a sick girl
in here.

To level with you,
I don't know the whole story.

[ Indistinct talking ]

He's in shock.

Help me
get him downstairs.

He's got to go
to a hospital.

You should be all right,
Mr. Harrison.

She's gonna be back.
I know it.

Somebody
give us a hand here?

Nash, will you see that
everything is wrapped up?

Nash: All right, lieutenant,
will do.

Hey, you.
Come on, out. Out.

You want to spend the night
in the can? Move.

Man: Jesus, what's the matter
with this guy?

Doctor:
Suffering from shock.

We have to get him
to the hospital.

Can you get us a car,
Nash?Yeah, yeah, let's go.

[ Door closes ]

[ Siren wailing in distance ]

[ Soft giggling ]

[ Humming ]

Agnes...

It's me, Billy.

[ Dog barking ]

[ Telephone ringing ]

[ Ringing continues ]

[ Static crackles ]

Okay, so, we can finally talk
about the ending.

But first let's talk about
that image of the eye,

Billy's eye, seen in closeup
peering through the door.

Nobody can remember whose eye
that actually was,

but it is one of the most
memorable moments in the movie.

It's a shock-scare moment
with a very simple image.

All right, the ending.

I don't feel sorry for Peter

even though he probably got
beat to death with a fire poker

just for trying to help,
and you know why?

'Cause Peter wears a turtleneck,
and he has a mullet,

and he looks dorky
in that turtleneck.

That is the most complicated red
herring in the history of film.

So, all we know at the end,
as the phone continues to ring,

no one to answer it,
and no one's there to save Jess

because apparently
the CSI people in Toronto

just tidy everything up,
they don't check the attic,

they leave her alone
even though she's drugged up

and damn near catatonic.

And as I pointed out
at the beginning,

that master shot does not get
the same credit

as the Orson Welles shot at the
beginning of "Touch of Evil."

But here's my problem
with the ending, okay?

I get it 'cause Billy is
still alive.

But we don't have
any reasonable suspect

among the remaining
cast members.

Claire's daddy? No.

Sergeant Nash?
Too stupid to carry it off.

The lieutenant?

That would be
an extremely false red herring.

We know too much about him,
and, so, you're thinking,

"Okay, so, Billy was not shown
anywhere in the cast."

Well, you can't do that!

You can't set up
a mystery premise

and then make it impossible
to resolve it

by the evidence that we've seen
on the screen.

We see nothing of Billy
except his eye.

We hear nothing of his story

except from those
distorted obscene calls.

We don't know
where he came from.

We don't know why he fixated
on this sorority house,

or anything else that would
lead us to a conclusion

about why this happened.

So, the whole movie is
a red herring.

"The Sixth Sense" --
That was a trick,

but we had lots of visual clues,
lots of sound clues,

lots of things said
in the dialogue.

Having the killer still alive
in this movie is saying,

"There never was a killer.

It was all a trick on you,
the audience."

Hence my one-star deduction
for what is otherwise

a very competent film.

Olivia Hussey, despite thinking
she was slumming

when she made this movie,

would go on to make
two more horror movies.

The original "It" in 1990
and that same year,

Mick Garris's
"Psycho IV: The Beginning"

playing Norma Bates.

Now, the movie
was not a failure,

despite what I said before.

It was a failure
in the United States,

but not in Canada and
not elsewhere in the world.

It grossed
about $4 million Canadian

on a budget of $620,000.

I have a question, though --

Who keeps a working dial phone
in their attic?

So, guys...I know a lot of you
are "Black Christmas" fanatics,

so don't kill me for this,

but the movie gets a lot of
credit from the horror community

simply because it was mishandled
by Warner Brothers in the '70s.

And by the way,
have you ever seen

the Warner Brothers poster
for the film?

"If this movie doesn't make your
skin crawl, it's on too tight."

Is that the worst tag line
in history? I think so.

Anyway, I think it could have
been much better.

I think the logic of it
is kinda fuzzy.

I think the scenes intended
to be humorous

are not that humorous
and slow down the movie.

I think some of the acting is
off kilter.

I admire Bob Clark for trying
to do something different,

but he intentionally does not
share the backstory with us.

We're supposed to piece it
together from the phone calls,

and that's impossible.

It has some great scenes in it,
but it's not a classic.

It's not the slasher that
inspired all the other slashers.

I would call it a proto-slasher.

It came out before the era
of the slashers.

And it does have
that final shot.

It took eight hours
to light the final shot

and a great deal of physical
effort to actually shoot it.

And, so, it does deliver the
eerie effect that's intended.

And if you wanna talk about it
if you disagree with me,

Darcy will be taking your angry
tweets and your angry e-mails.

Right, Darcy?

Yeah.
Thanks a lot for that.

All right.
You love this film, right?

Um, not really.

I cheerlead for it because
the fans really want to see it.

And I think Margot Kidder
and Olivia Hussey are awesome,

Wasn't Olivia Hussey
in "Ice Cream Man"?

I'd have to double-check that,
but that'd be another.

Really?I think so, y'all.

I don't remember that.Somebody check that.

But you like the remake better
than this one.
Yeah.

I knew we were
gonna go there.

Sometimes the remakes
are better.

The remake is, like --
It's schlockier, it's more fun,

it has an overt
holiday atmosphere,

and it has people cookies,
so, winner.

Wait a minute.
You're not talking about the one

that came out today, you're
talking about the one from 2006.

Yeah, with
the people cookies.Oh, okay.

And they explain who Billy is.
That's important.

Same guy who made
"Willard," right?
Yes.

You'll probably like the remake
of the remake

even better
than the remake.

It's very possible.

I'm guessing all the sorority
sisters in the Blumhouse remake

are feminists with martial-arts
skills in the new version.

That would be amazing.
I hope you're right.

All right.
Do we have some mail?

We have so much mail
that it's actually getting hard

to choose the mail
for you.

That's why
I'm making you do it.

All right, well,
thanks again.

Okay, so, here is
a Christmasy letter

from Megan Beck
of Uniontown, Ohio.

Megan Beck. All right.

"Your comments about how we all
watch the movies together

left me smiling ear to ear
[and maybe a little teary eyed].

I love everybody coming together
to enjoy the movies together.

There are
even group chats

so we can all be connected
while we watch.

Thanks for reminding us

how movies are supposed to
be enjoyed.

Keep doing what you do best!
Megan Beck."

I do remember Megan's letter,
and I think she came

to one of the live shows
in Cleveland,

but, Darcy, this is not
what we're doing tonight.

This is
a heartwarming letter.

This is a sweet letter
from an optimistic person.

We're looking
for sad, depressing stuff.

Well, actually,
I refuse to give you

sad, depressing mailbag,
but, uh, here.

Here's a couple of letters
from people who sometimes feel

a little left out at
Christmastime.

All right, well,
that's getting closer.

This is...
Robert Hyatt of Columbus, Ohio.

Robert.

"I'm sure you've heard this
a thousand times,

but back in the day,
your "MonsterVision" show

is what got me hooked
on horror.

My brother and I weren't part
of the in crowd

so when everyone else
was out doing

whatever high schoolers do,
we were hunkered down

in our parents' basement
watching TV.

Coming across your show
was a godsend.

It gave us something to do,
something to look forward to.

It sounds corny, but it just
didn't feel as lonely

when we were watching
your show.

I still love old horror
to this day,

and the Shudder marathon
was a blast.

I'll be one of the many
that will be begging Shudder

to make this
a recurring thing.

But if this is really it,
I just want to say thanks, man,

for giving these old, forgotten
movies their time to shine

and for giving us all a friend
to watch them with.

Robert Hyatt."

No, Robert, we're gonna be doing
it a little while longer.

At least one more season
of shows.

So, screw the in crowd,
long live the basement.

Yeah, mutants!You know what I mean?

You know what I hate?

I hate it when you go
to a restaurant

during Christmas week,
and they say,

"We're closing early
to be with our families."

Because, you know,
there might be some guy

standing outside
who has no family!

That's not a good thing
to tell people.

Maybe you should've
been his family that night

because it's
fucking Christmas, okay?

All right, well, I knew that was
gonna get you started,

so...I have
a very special one for you.

Oh, my God.[ Laughing ] Read that.

With the
crystal unicorn.

In honor
of Margot Kidder.

You're not gonna
use that, are you?

All right,
"Dear Joe Bob,

I'm a 20-year-old
college student

with cerebral palsy,
and I wanted to tell you

how much your love
for horror movies

and pop culture means to me
as a person.

I love spouting out trivia
and fun facts

and watching
these classic horror films

with my 10-year-old
brother.

We even watched "Tourist Trap"
on your marathon together.

It was
seriously phenomenal.

Thank you Mr. Briggs.
Have a terrific day. Drew."

When we used to do the
World Drive-In Movie Festival,

our associated charity was
United Cerebral Palsy.

It was supposed to be
March of Dimes

because March of Dimes paid
for my medical care

when I was a kid
'cause I had polio.

But March of Dimes said
they did not wanna be associated

with horror
or my little horror festival

and exploitation movies,

and, so, they wouldn't take
our money.

But they have an overlap mission
with United Cerebral Palsy

in the birth-defect
department,

and, so, the cerebral palsy
people did take our money,

and we were proud
to have them as partners.

So, anyway,
I met a lot of C.P. guys,

and I can tell you horror has
a huge audience among --

Well, I was mostly meeting
the children with C.P.

But we have a huge audience
among special-needs kids.

Yeah, I can tell you that is
very much true.

Oh, because you're
a special-needs mom.

So, that's right.
All right.

So, we're getting
Christmasy now.

Thank YOU, Drew,
for hanging with us

for these little shows
that we do.

And if you're watching tonight,
please watch to the end,

but you might wanna warn
your 10-year-old brother

because Darcy here is going to
be brutally impaled

on reindeer antlers.Brutally?

Yeah, I added brutally.

And in fact, Yuki?

Yuki. Is Yuki here?
Yuki: Yes.

Do you have
the reindeer antlers?

Yes, I have antlers.

Yuki Nakamura,
ladies and gentlemen,

the Tokyo Cowboy,
our set designer

and device builder
and special effects whiz.

You have the antlers?Yes, I do.

Oh, man. Yuki.
Yuki, what are we doing here?

The stunt with antlers.

Yes, Yuki,
and that stunt with antlers

involves Darcy here,
okay?

Little small.
Look at Darcy.

Look at this.
Look at Darcy, all right?

Okay?
Look at these antlers.

Could these antlers
impale Darcy?

Yes?

There are parts of Darcy

these antlers aren't even
long enough to go through, okay?

You have two more movies
to get this thing ready, okay?

Go into
Darcy's dressing room.

Measure Darcy
from all angles, all right?

Plan your impalement device
accordingly.

Do a 360
on Darcy, okay?

Got it.
Okay.

Thank you, Yuki.

Those things couldn't even give
you a minor wrist injury.

Yeah. That's
not gonna work.

Okay,
we're gonna show

one of your favorite
Christmas movies next.

I've heard you talk
about this movie.

Ooh, I know
what it is.

Okay.
Somebody told you.

Yeah. Well, I mean,
I don't just pull the costumes

out of nowhere.

All right.
So, all right. Okay.

People have been complaining
that the closing joke

gets cut off
on their streaming feed,

so I have to
talk fast here.

A guy walks into a bar, and he
says to the female bartender,

"Hey, babe,
Anheuser Busch?"

And she says, "Fine.
How's your dick?"

[ Laughter ]

Hopefully,
that got cut off.

♪♪

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