All language subtitles for Youre the Worst s01e08 Finish Your Milk.eng

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,556 GRETCHEN: Yes, Rodney, I know the agreement is for two years. 2 00:00:02,652 --> 00:00:08,122 The truth is, I'm on dialysis. It's acute renal failure caused 3 00:00:08,156 --> 00:00:10,575 by sweat poisoning. Strenuous exercise could 4 00:00:10,609 --> 00:00:12,927 literally kill me. I'm with my doctor right now. 5 00:00:13,061 --> 00:00:15,580 - Let me put him on. - JIMMY: Oh, come on. 6 00:00:15,648 --> 00:00:18,533 (Sighs) (Indian accent): This is 7 00:00:18,651 --> 00:00:21,536 Dr. Patel. Look, between you and me, she's 8 00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:24,822 on her deathbed. I told her to cancel her gym 9 00:00:24,957 --> 00:00:28,493 membership just to give her a purpose in her final hours. 10 00:00:28,627 --> 00:00:31,846 What a tragedy to die so young having not accomplished 11 00:00:31,964 --> 00:00:34,626 - anything in life. - GRETCHEN: Oh, that guy. 12 00:00:34,632 --> 00:00:37,339 What a pessimist. I'm gonna fight this thing! 13 00:00:37,435 --> 00:00:38,736 Thanks, Rodney. You've been a delight. 14 00:00:38,754 --> 00:00:40,755 JIMMY: Why don't you just say, "I don't want to go to your 15 00:00:40,889 --> 00:00:42,757 - dumb gym anymore?" - GRETCHEN: Because I don't 16 00:00:42,891 --> 00:00:44,842 want Rodney out there judging me when I don't show up for 10:00 17 00:00:44,977 --> 00:00:46,811 - a.m. Pilates class. - JIMMY: You've never been to a 18 00:00:46,929 --> 00:00:48,730 - 10:00 a.m. anything. - GRETCHEN: My flight's soon. 19 00:00:48,847 --> 00:00:51,516 Can we continue this when I come back from parental purgatory? 20 00:00:51,650 --> 00:00:53,768 JIMMY: Are your folks really that awful? 21 00:00:53,902 --> 00:00:56,521 GRETCHEN: Just uptight and lame. 22 00:00:56,689 --> 00:00:59,657 They act like I don't have my shit together. 23 00:00:59,775 --> 00:01:01,693 JIMMY: Those clothes aren't even fully dry. 24 00:01:01,827 --> 00:01:04,696 GRETCHEN: I'm gonna go borrow your toothbrush. 25 00:01:07,916 --> 00:01:10,535 - (Edgar sighs) - JIMMY: Uh, the trash goes 26 00:01:10,669 --> 00:01:12,904 from inside to outside, not the other way around. 27 00:01:13,071 --> 00:01:14,706 EDGAR: Oh, I've been trying this recycling thing. 28 00:01:14,873 --> 00:01:18,160 If I save up enough money, I can buy Ambien from this Web site. 29 00:01:18,226 --> 00:01:20,011 JIMMY: Isn't the V.A. supposed to give you drugs for 30 00:01:20,078 --> 00:01:22,467 your... for your war brain stuff? 31 00:01:22,530 --> 00:01:24,849 EDGAR: I don't want to use up resources when there are vets 32 00:01:24,917 --> 00:01:26,918 - out there with real problems. - JIMMY: You're trading soda 33 00:01:27,085 --> 00:01:29,570 cans for black market pharmaceuticals. 34 00:01:29,605 --> 00:01:32,470 - That is a problem! - EDGAR: Fine. 35 00:01:32,540 --> 00:01:37,086 - I'll go talk to them. - GRETCHEN: And I'm out. 36 00:01:37,128 --> 00:01:39,411 JIMMY: All right, just let me wash this mask off, and then we 37 00:01:39,430 --> 00:01:40,383 - can go. - GRETCHEN: Oh, no, no, no. 38 00:01:40,432 --> 00:01:41,666 - I'll just take an Uber. - JIMMY: I'm headed that 39 00:01:41,734 --> 00:01:42,784 - direction anyway. - GRETCHEN: Jimmy, you're not 40 00:01:42,901 --> 00:01:44,736 driving me to the airport. That's ridiculous. 41 00:01:44,903 --> 00:01:47,739 JIMMY: Look, I promise there will be no mushy, curbside 42 00:01:47,906 --> 00:01:49,824 stuff, okay? I won't even come to a complete 43 00:01:49,958 --> 00:01:51,743 stop. You can just tuck and roll, all 44 00:01:51,910 --> 00:01:54,579 right? Give me a couple of minutes. 45 00:02:01,637 --> 00:02:06,641 I'm gonna leave you anyway I'm gonna leave you anyway 46 00:02:06,759 --> 00:02:08,726 Gonna leave you anyway. 47 00:02:08,726 --> 00:02:13,726 Sync and corrections by explosiveskull www.addic7ed.com 48 00:02:13,972 --> 00:02:15,533 BECCA: You cheated on Paul?! 49 00:02:15,601 --> 00:02:16,434 LINDSAY: Shh. 50 00:02:16,602 --> 00:02:17,518 Don't whisper-yell at me! 51 00:02:17,653 --> 00:02:18,603 BECCA: How can you even live 52 00:02:18,737 --> 00:02:19,604 with yourself? 53 00:02:19,738 --> 00:02:20,605 LINDSAY: I can't! 54 00:02:20,739 --> 00:02:21,773 I feel so bad, I can't eat or 55 00:02:21,907 --> 00:02:23,524 watch any shows with adultery. 56 00:02:23,659 --> 00:02:24,809 That's all my shows. 57 00:02:24,943 --> 00:02:27,445 - I'm getting nosebleeds from the guilt. - BECCA: Nosebleeds? 58 00:02:27,613 --> 00:02:28,446 LINDSAY: Also, I lied. 59 00:02:28,614 --> 00:02:30,319 I can totally eat. 60 00:02:30,770 --> 00:02:32,410 WOMAN: Ladies, please keep it down. 61 00:02:32,609 --> 00:02:33,477 LINDSAY: It's not fair. 62 00:02:33,913 --> 00:02:34,912 You don't know what it's like 63 00:02:34,912 --> 00:02:37,013 to yearn for the touch of another. 64 00:02:38,624 --> 00:02:40,508 BECCA: Jimmy tried to kiss me. 65 00:02:40,626 --> 00:02:41,626 LINDSAY (Loudly): What?! 66 00:02:41,794 --> 00:02:42,960 BECCA: But I... 67 00:02:42,978 --> 00:02:47,353 Oh, I said no... because I love my husband. 68 00:02:47,353 --> 00:02:48,303 LINDSAY: Did you want to? 69 00:02:48,303 --> 00:02:49,467 BECCA: I took a vow. 70 00:02:49,635 --> 00:02:51,636 Marriage means being in it 24/7 71 00:02:51,770 --> 00:02:53,370 from the moment when you wake up 72 00:02:53,370 --> 00:02:54,828 in the morning, and you see that 73 00:02:54,828 --> 00:02:56,992 red, curly happy trail, to 74 00:02:56,992 --> 00:02:59,347 at night when he rolls off of you 75 00:02:59,347 --> 00:03:00,611 and asks if you've had your "gazz" yet. 76 00:03:00,729 --> 00:03:02,613 LINDSAY: He asks you after he rolls off you? 77 00:03:02,731 --> 00:03:04,982 BECCA: The point is, I restrain myself because I am not 78 00:03:04,982 --> 00:03:06,956 an animal. After this class, you are gonna 79 00:03:06,956 --> 00:03:09,441 - come clean with Paul. - LINDSAY: I can't tell him. 80 00:03:09,441 --> 00:03:09,704 BECCA: Lindsay, you're not gonna tell him? 81 00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:12,552 - LINDSAY: Ow! Ow! Bec, stop! - BECCA: You need me to make 82 00:03:12,652 --> 00:03:13,624 you tell him? You gonna tell him, Lindsay? 83 00:03:13,742 --> 00:03:14,839 - You gonna tell him? - LINDSAY: Ow! 84 00:03:14,839 --> 00:03:16,595 BECCA: You know I can make you tell him, can make you! 85 00:03:16,912 --> 00:03:19,630 LINDSAY: No. Fine! (Whispers): Fine. 86 00:03:19,748 --> 00:03:24,469 Fine, I'll tell him. (Gasps) 87 00:03:24,586 --> 00:03:28,389 BECCA: You can continue the yoga now. 88 00:03:30,592 --> 00:03:32,393 89 00:03:34,813 --> 00:03:37,418 I got three, four gallons of Hennessy 90 00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:39,217 I got all my dawgs at the V.I.P... 91 00:03:39,285 --> 00:03:43,973 JIMMY: Cheers. Fellows! How is it? 92 00:03:43,973 --> 00:03:46,072 Yeah. Are you here to see a black 93 00:03:46,073 --> 00:03:48,177 - movie, as well? - HONEY NUTZ: We just call it 94 00:03:48,177 --> 00:03:50,177 - a movie. - JIMMY: Where's Sam? 95 00:03:50,177 --> 00:03:51,512 SHITSTAIN: Had a meeting. He's on the board of the 96 00:03:51,547 --> 00:03:53,331 Angelino Heights Restoration Committee. 97 00:03:53,699 --> 00:03:54,866 HONEY NUTZ: What are you doing here? 98 00:03:55,033 --> 00:03:57,502 JIMMY: I like to yell out character inconsistencies, 99 00:03:57,619 --> 00:04:00,137 structural flaws, and keep a general humorous running 100 00:04:00,155 --> 00:04:01,806 commentary. This is the only place I can do 101 00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:04,625 - that. - SHITSTAIN: To be fair, we do 102 00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:07,350 like to go to Beverly Hills to see a Wes Anderson movie, so... 103 00:04:07,350 --> 00:04:08,729 HONEY NUTZ: I like it when they clap for Bill Murray. 104 00:04:08,764 --> 00:04:10,631 - SHITSTAIN: Yeah, he's funny. - HONEY NUTZ: Yeah, yeah. 105 00:04:10,766 --> 00:04:12,717 - SHITSTAIN: Okay, he's funny. - JIMMY: I've just dropped 106 00:04:12,851 --> 00:04:15,469 Gretchen off at the airport, as well, so I was in the hood 107 00:04:15,604 --> 00:04:16,921 - anyway. - HONEY NUTZ: Where does that 108 00:04:16,989 --> 00:04:19,073 bitch think she flying? We supposed to meet her ass 109 00:04:19,091 --> 00:04:20,608 - tomorrow morning. - JIMMY: Oh, that's impossible. 110 00:04:20,626 --> 00:04:22,827 She's gone home for, like, a week. 111 00:04:22,895 --> 00:04:24,562 SHITSTAIN: Hey, it's Shitstain. 112 00:04:24,730 --> 00:04:28,482 Where are you? Oh, oh, she's here. 113 00:04:28,617 --> 00:04:30,568 Yeah, she's headed to the museum with her parents. 114 00:04:30,736 --> 00:04:32,737 Yeah, yeah, Sam tried to drag us to that. 115 00:04:32,871 --> 00:04:35,489 Heard the Rauschenberg pretty tight. 116 00:04:35,624 --> 00:04:38,583 - Okay, word. - HONEY NUTZ: Mm. Okay, so she 117 00:04:38,583 --> 00:04:40,176 told you she was flying out of town? 118 00:04:40,176 --> 00:04:41,579 - JIMMY: Yeah. - HONEY NUTZ: And now she at a 119 00:04:41,747 --> 00:04:43,214 - museum? - SHITSTAIN: Why would she lie 120 00:04:43,332 --> 00:04:45,750 to you about seeing her folks? Have you met them? 121 00:04:45,918 --> 00:04:48,985 - JIMMY: No. - HONEY NUTZ: Oh, shit. 122 00:04:48,985 --> 00:04:50,193 - (Laughs) - SHITSTAIN: Yo. 123 00:04:50,193 --> 00:04:51,756 HONEY NUTZ: She trying to hide you! 124 00:04:51,890 --> 00:04:54,287 SHITSTAIN: It's just like Richie and Margot in The Royal 125 00:04:54,287 --> 00:04:55,726 - Tenenbaums. - HONEY NUTZ: Right. Shit. 126 00:04:55,844 --> 00:04:58,372 Look, I wouldn't want to tell my mom I'm dating Draco Malfoy, 127 00:04:58,372 --> 00:04:59,647 - either. - SHITSTAIN: Draco. 128 00:04:59,765 --> 00:05:01,599 - BOTH: Draco! - SHITSTAIN: That's... 129 00:05:01,767 --> 00:05:03,980 - (Honey Nutz laughs) - Draco! 130 00:05:03,980 --> 00:05:07,392 - It's butter in that? - HONEY NUTZ: Oh, yeah, there's 131 00:05:07,392 --> 00:05:07,772 - butter in there. Right. - SHITSTAIN: Oh, we good, we 132 00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:10,104 - good. - EDGAR: So, for a while, I 133 00:05:10,104 --> 00:05:13,249 started drinking generic vodka till I passed out, but then I'd 134 00:05:13,249 --> 00:05:16,228 still have the same nightmares, only in the dream, I'd be drunk 135 00:05:16,228 --> 00:05:18,519 - and way less coordinated. - CASEWORKER: I am so sorry, 136 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:19,740 - brother. - EDGAR: Yeah, now I'm scared 137 00:05:19,740 --> 00:05:22,081 to go to sleep because I wake up super angry. 138 00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:24,232 CASEWORKER: Sleep to rage. It's the worst. 139 00:05:24,232 --> 00:05:27,075 I used to tell my wife to duct-tape pillows to my hands 140 00:05:27,075 --> 00:05:29,884 in case I woke up swinging. (Chuckles) 141 00:05:31,713 --> 00:05:35,897 EDGAR: So, my roommate says that I have a serious problem, 142 00:05:35,897 --> 00:05:38,152 and that you guys should cover all my meds. 143 00:05:38,152 --> 00:05:42,205 CASEWORKER: Usually, I have to turn down a lot of folks, but 144 00:05:42,205 --> 00:05:45,476 you seem like a perfect candidate for help. 145 00:05:45,611 --> 00:05:47,478 Real quick, who is this roommate? 146 00:05:47,613 --> 00:05:50,378 EDGAR: Oh, Jimmy. He's a novelist from Britain. 147 00:05:50,378 --> 00:05:52,189 He lets me live with him in exchange for cooking and 148 00:05:52,189 --> 00:05:53,484 - housework. - CASEWORKER: You have a job? 149 00:05:53,619 --> 00:05:56,076 Tight. It can be so tough for vets to 150 00:05:56,176 --> 00:05:56,921 - find work... - EDGAR: Oh, no, he doesn't pay 151 00:05:56,989 --> 00:05:59,490 - me. - CASEWORKER: Cool. 152 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:02,744 So he thinks the U.S. government should cover your expenses... 153 00:06:02,744 --> 00:06:03,661 - EDGAR: Mm-hmm. - CASEWORKER: while you work 154 00:06:03,795 --> 00:06:05,746 - for free? - EDGAR: Oh, no. 155 00:06:05,881 --> 00:06:09,417 - He's my best friend. - CASEWORKER: Cool. 156 00:06:09,551 --> 00:06:13,554 Okay, very cool. Soldier, have you ever heard of 157 00:06:13,672 --> 00:06:17,386 Domestic Civilian Transference Syndrome By Proxy? 158 00:06:17,386 --> 00:06:18,476 - EDGAR: Mm-mm. - CASEWORKER: It's my only 159 00:06:18,593 --> 00:06:20,645 copy, but trust me, it's highly true. 160 00:06:20,762 --> 00:06:26,006 You need to nip this in the bud. Tonight, you sit this so-called 161 00:06:26,006 --> 00:06:29,437 roommate down and you say, "Hey, man, I was in the shit while you 162 00:06:29,571 --> 00:06:33,169 were at home watching telly. If my nightmares are too scary 163 00:06:33,169 --> 00:06:36,093 for you, maybe you need to pay for my meds!" 164 00:06:36,093 --> 00:06:37,493 - EDGAR: Damn straight. - CASEWORKER: Yeah, you tell 165 00:06:37,493 --> 00:06:39,530 - him that. - EDGAR: I will tell him that. 166 00:06:39,665 --> 00:06:42,856 I will! Thank you. 167 00:06:42,856 --> 00:06:45,703 CASEWORKER: You're welcome, soldier. 168 00:06:45,871 --> 00:06:48,539 EDGAR (Mutters): Watching telly... 169 00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:52,460 - (Muttering continues) - CASEWORKER: Number 97. 170 00:07:03,195 --> 00:07:05,029 - PAUL: You're home. - LINDSAY: We need to talk 171 00:07:05,197 --> 00:07:09,367 about something. This has been eating away at me, 172 00:07:09,535 --> 00:07:12,203 but the fact is... 173 00:07:18,044 --> 00:07:21,346 I realized I don't really know what you do all day. 174 00:07:21,463 --> 00:07:23,381 (Chuckles) Tell me about this... 175 00:07:23,549 --> 00:07:26,134 - weird thing. - PAUL: The recumbent? 176 00:07:26,268 --> 00:07:28,353 LINDSAY: Yeah! How does it work? 177 00:07:28,470 --> 00:07:32,306 PAUL: Well, if you really want the total experience, 178 00:07:32,441 --> 00:07:37,228 - I can always pull out the tandem. - LINDSAY: The what now? 179 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:44,080 PAUL: A semi-reclined position provides broader 180 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:49,073 distribution of body weight, and alas for better blood flow to the anus and testicles. 181 00:07:49,241 --> 00:07:52,243 Aw, heck yeah! Here's the gang! 182 00:07:52,411 --> 00:07:55,580 Mimi, Connor, this is my wife Lindsay. 183 00:07:55,597 --> 00:07:57,882 (Chuckles) Last one to Starbucks is an 184 00:07:57,950 --> 00:08:01,035 uprighter! (Groans loudly) 185 00:08:01,470 --> 00:08:04,918 We should let them win. Connor's life-coaching business 186 00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:07,292 just went under, and Mimi has impetigo. 187 00:08:07,509 --> 00:08:10,094 All right, here I come, Mimi. Look out. 188 00:08:10,262 --> 00:08:13,064 - (Bicycle bell dings) - (Chuckles) 189 00:08:19,271 --> 00:08:21,105 JIMMY: Nice use of negative space. 190 00:08:21,273 --> 00:08:23,107 GRETCHEN: What are you doing here?! 191 00:08:23,275 --> 00:08:25,109 JIMMY: What are you doing here? 192 00:08:25,277 --> 00:08:27,143 I just dropped you at the airport! 193 00:08:27,143 --> 00:08:28,561 GRETCHEN: What? No, you didn't. 194 00:08:28,561 --> 00:08:30,415 - JIMMY: Yes, I did. - GRETCHEN: What?! What are you 195 00:08:30,532 --> 00:08:35,253 talking about? No, that was a dream you had. 196 00:08:35,370 --> 00:08:38,013 All right, fine. This is so dumb. 197 00:08:38,013 --> 00:08:42,410 So, I am waiting at the gate as they deplane the flight before 198 00:08:42,444 --> 00:08:46,164 mine, and all of a sudden, guess who gets off? 199 00:08:46,381 --> 00:08:50,054 My friggin' parents! And I'm like, "What?! 200 00:08:50,054 --> 00:08:53,305 I thought you guys wanted me to come visit." 201 00:08:53,439 --> 00:08:57,275 So dumb. Gretchen, you nerd. 202 00:08:57,392 --> 00:09:00,415 - JIMMY: Stop. - GRETCHEN: All right, I lied. 203 00:09:00,415 --> 00:09:02,146 But Vanessa and Fred are such a bummer! 204 00:09:02,314 --> 00:09:05,560 I didn't want to subject you to their passive-aggressive shit. 205 00:09:05,560 --> 00:09:08,893 JIMMY: Right, so you packed and had me drop you off at the 206 00:09:08,893 --> 00:09:11,661 - airport? - GRETCHEN: Did I really pack? 207 00:09:11,661 --> 00:09:15,004 I just put some damp laundry and toilet paper into a suitcase. 208 00:09:15,005 --> 00:09:16,756 - Open your eyes, Jimmy. - JIMMY: Right, well, I have to 209 00:09:16,756 --> 00:09:19,909 meet the people that created this nightmare of a person. 210 00:09:19,909 --> 00:09:21,907 GRETCHEN: Oh, I would, but we have to leave. 211 00:09:21,907 --> 00:09:23,788 - I'm taking them to the airport. - JIMMY: I thought you just 212 00:09:23,788 --> 00:09:25,253 - picked them up. - GRETCHEN: It turns out they 213 00:09:25,287 --> 00:09:27,768 can't stay. Dad is having emergency back 214 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:29,982 surgery tomorrow at Johns Hopkins. 215 00:09:29,982 --> 00:09:34,145 He is having his L7 fused, and they just had a cancellation. 216 00:09:34,263 --> 00:09:37,148 The procedure's experimental, but Dr. Pablo's the best, and a 217 00:09:37,266 --> 00:09:39,830 slot just opened up. I am serious. 218 00:09:39,830 --> 00:09:42,730 JIMMY: Mm. Well, I'm not leaving until you produce these 219 00:09:42,730 --> 00:09:45,800 - monsters. - GRETCHEN: All right. 220 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:48,276 You asked for it. 221 00:09:55,534 --> 00:09:58,169 - JIMMY: You're not art. - GRETCHEN: Jimmy? 222 00:09:58,287 --> 00:10:01,778 - Vanessa and Fred. - MOM: Jimmy, hi. 223 00:10:01,778 --> 00:10:03,298 - JIMMY: Hi. - MOM: Nice to meet you. 224 00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:05,696 - So sorry we have to run. - DAD: I'm having a surgery, 225 00:10:05,696 --> 00:10:07,933 - Jimmy. - JIMMY: Yes. Yes, Gretchen 226 00:10:07,933 --> 00:10:11,215 said. Okay, good luck with that. 227 00:10:11,350 --> 00:10:15,711 So glad I got to meet you. So I'll see you later? 228 00:10:15,711 --> 00:10:17,305 GRETCHEN: Uh, nah, I have a work thing. 229 00:10:17,439 --> 00:10:20,224 - Call you tomorrow? - JIMMY: Okay. 230 00:10:31,403 --> 00:10:35,456 GRETCHEN (Echoing): My dad's having back surgery... 231 00:10:35,574 --> 00:10:43,019 at Johns Hopkins. He's having his L7 fused. 232 00:10:44,550 --> 00:10:49,455 Dr. Pablo's the best. Back surgery... 233 00:10:49,455 --> 00:10:51,612 Johns Hopkins... Back surgery... 234 00:10:51,612 --> 00:10:53,457 Johns Hopkins... Back surgery... 235 00:10:53,457 --> 00:10:57,261 John Hopkins... Dr. Pablo... 236 00:10:57,396 --> 00:11:03,150 Procedure's experimental... experimental... experimental. 237 00:11:06,771 --> 00:11:09,879 DAD: Well, they said that it's, like, all tropical plants 238 00:11:09,879 --> 00:11:10,207 - they've got. - MOM: Oh, okay. 239 00:11:10,275 --> 00:11:12,653 JIMMY: Who are you? Where's Gretchen? 240 00:11:12,653 --> 00:11:14,055 MOM: Oh, look, hon. It's the guy with the accent. 241 00:11:14,055 --> 00:11:16,256 DAD: That lady said we were on a hidden camera show. 242 00:11:16,256 --> 00:11:17,684 - What channel will this be on? - MOM: Oh, I bet it's nine. 243 00:11:17,684 --> 00:11:20,660 - DAD: Four? No, four, right? - MOM: No. No, I bet you a week 244 00:11:20,660 --> 00:11:22,499 - of dishes it's channel nine. - DAD: Nine?! 245 00:11:22,499 --> 00:11:24,121 - MOM: Nine. Nine. Nine. - DAD: Four. Four. Four. 246 00:11:28,601 --> 00:11:31,903 PAUL: And as I like to say, once you pedal on your back, 247 00:11:32,021 --> 00:11:34,822 you never go back. To pedaling normally. 248 00:11:34,940 --> 00:11:37,025 - (Chuckles) - (Lindsay laughs weakly) 249 00:11:37,159 --> 00:11:39,744 - LINDSAY: This is really nice. - PAUL: Well, there's more 250 00:11:39,862 --> 00:11:43,507 where that came from. Were you serious about seeing 251 00:11:43,507 --> 00:11:48,036 - what I do for fun? - LINDSAY: Yes. 252 00:11:48,204 --> 00:11:51,756 PAUL (Laughs): Well, hold on to your hat. 253 00:11:51,874 --> 00:11:54,876 - (Lindsay groans) - (Engine sputtering) 254 00:11:59,815 --> 00:12:03,968 Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached an altitude of 75 feet. 255 00:12:04,103 --> 00:12:06,888 If you look out the right side of the plane, you can see the 256 00:12:07,056 --> 00:12:09,941 San Gabriels. Those on the left can catch a 257 00:12:10,059 --> 00:12:13,978 glimpse of my beautiful wife Lindsay. (Chuckles) 258 00:12:14,113 --> 00:12:16,281 DARREN (Over radio): Paul, you know that sub-hundred 259 00:12:16,398 --> 00:12:18,420 elevation is for westbound traffic only. 260 00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:20,985 PAUL: Roger that. Sorry, Darren. 261 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:26,874 Climbing. Did you know that four American 262 00:12:26,992 --> 00:12:31,885 presidents were home-brewers? Can you guess? 263 00:12:31,885 --> 00:12:38,753 George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, 264 00:12:38,887 --> 00:12:40,672 and...? 265 00:12:43,105 --> 00:12:48,680 The answer is Barack Obama! Uh... 266 00:12:48,814 --> 00:12:51,246 - Lindsay? - LINDSAY: Huh? 267 00:12:51,246 --> 00:12:53,935 Oh. I'm fine. 268 00:12:54,103 --> 00:12:57,689 - Keep talking beer. - (Paul sighs) 269 00:13:00,859 --> 00:13:02,895 EDGAR: Jimmy, we need to talk. 270 00:13:02,895 --> 00:13:06,260 JIMMY: Gretchen was so scared of me meeting her parents that 271 00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:09,784 she hired fake parents. Am I really Draco Malfoy? 272 00:13:09,952 --> 00:13:11,953 EDGAR: I just talked to the V.A., and... 273 00:13:12,121 --> 00:13:15,924 Am I just some unpaid servant who lives here for free? 274 00:13:15,924 --> 00:13:17,407 JIMMY: That's a concise way of putting it. 275 00:13:17,407 --> 00:13:20,682 EDGAR: My caseworker says maybe you should be paying for 276 00:13:20,682 --> 00:13:22,515 - my meds. - JIMMY: Right. Listen to me, 277 00:13:22,515 --> 00:13:25,577 my friend. You bought into a long con. 278 00:13:25,577 --> 00:13:28,853 Society screwed you over, and we owe you for that. 279 00:13:28,971 --> 00:13:32,349 I, personally, do not owe you, but a sort of collective "we" 280 00:13:32,349 --> 00:13:35,210 does. And you need your meds so you 281 00:13:35,210 --> 00:13:38,880 can shake off some of the damage done by Cheney's fictional 282 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:42,759 yellowcake uranium. So, you turn around, you go back 283 00:13:42,759 --> 00:13:46,788 to the V.A., and you demand your due! 284 00:13:56,231 --> 00:13:58,191 - (Gretchen sighs) - FRED: 15, love. 285 00:13:58,191 --> 00:14:00,109 - Let's go, sweetie. - VANESSA: Gretchen, 286 00:14:00,109 --> 00:14:01,869 your backhand has completely disintegrated. 287 00:14:01,937 --> 00:14:03,480 - GRETCHEN: Sorry, Mommy. - VANESSA: Seven years of 288 00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:06,641 training with Andr?s for nothing. (Scoffs) 289 00:14:08,927 --> 00:14:11,313 - Ready? - FRED: You can do it, sweetie. 290 00:14:11,313 --> 00:14:14,932 - GRETCHEN: Sorry, Mommy. - (Jimmy mouthing) 291 00:14:24,159 --> 00:14:26,873 JIMMY: Hello, darling. Sorry I'm late. 292 00:14:26,873 --> 00:14:30,998 Mwah. Hello. I'm Jimmy Shive-Overly. 293 00:14:31,116 --> 00:14:33,953 - Gretchen's boyfriend. - FRED: Oh, well, hello. 294 00:14:33,953 --> 00:14:35,920 - I'm Fred. - VANESSA: Vanessa. 295 00:14:36,038 --> 00:14:38,790 Please join us. In her typical way, Gretchen has 296 00:14:38,924 --> 00:14:40,842 - told us nothing about you. - JIMMY: Ugh! 297 00:14:40,959 --> 00:14:43,711 (Chuckles) Milk. 298 00:14:43,879 --> 00:14:47,598 Gretchen... always ordering milk. Sometimes double milks. 299 00:14:47,598 --> 00:14:51,452 I actually sometimes wonder if maybe she drinks too much milk. 300 00:14:51,452 --> 00:14:55,287 - (Jimmy laughs) - VANESSA: So, Jimmy, where are 301 00:14:55,287 --> 00:14:57,027 - you from? - GRETCHEN: London. 302 00:14:57,027 --> 00:14:59,610 - The fancy part. - FRED: And what do you do? 303 00:14:59,728 --> 00:15:03,878 GRETCHEN: He's a novelist. Published, very well-regarded. 304 00:15:03,878 --> 00:15:04,705 - Jimmy... - VANESSA: And, Gretchen, 305 00:15:04,705 --> 00:15:06,784 you're still doing that music thing? 306 00:15:06,902 --> 00:15:09,153 FRED: Who's that skinny boy you represent? 307 00:15:09,153 --> 00:15:10,905 - JIMMY: Shitstain? - GRETCHEN: No! 308 00:15:11,039 --> 00:15:15,354 - Josh Groban is who he meant. - VANESSA: How did you two 309 00:15:15,354 --> 00:15:17,745 - meet? - GRETCHEN: At a fund-raiser. 310 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,665 It was... animal-related. 311 00:15:20,799 --> 00:15:23,340 FRED: Uh-huh, Gretchen does so much charity work. 312 00:15:23,340 --> 00:15:24,836 JIMMY: Oh, she does love animals. 313 00:15:24,970 --> 00:15:26,621 Tell your mom how you got your cat. 314 00:15:26,621 --> 00:15:28,858 GRETCHEN: Jimmy, it was so nice of you to stop by, but I 315 00:15:28,858 --> 00:15:30,571 know you have that meeting. I'll walk you out. 316 00:15:30,571 --> 00:15:34,197 - VANESSA: What meeting? - GRETCHEN: Movie producers. 317 00:15:34,197 --> 00:15:36,691 From Hollywood. They are turning his book into a 318 00:15:36,691 --> 00:15:41,849 movie starring Zach Braff and that woman from the show you 319 00:15:41,849 --> 00:15:42,635 - like. - VANESSA: Scandal? 320 00:15:42,635 --> 00:15:45,698 GRETCHEN: Yes, Scandal. Jimmy, I bet that driver has 321 00:15:45,698 --> 00:15:47,737 been waiting outside for a while now. 322 00:15:47,737 --> 00:15:49,777 You should go. 323 00:15:51,914 --> 00:15:54,699 JIMMY: Okay. Nice to meet you both. 324 00:15:58,554 --> 00:16:01,630 Okay, none of this is true. I'm not from the fancy part of 325 00:16:01,630 --> 00:16:03,675 London, I'm from the bad part of Manchester. 326 00:16:03,675 --> 00:16:04,846 - GRETCHEN: Stop. - JIMMY: I am an author. 327 00:16:04,846 --> 00:16:07,807 Talented but wildly underappreciated. 328 00:16:07,807 --> 00:16:10,853 I had to follow Gretchen here today, only to witness her 329 00:16:10,853 --> 00:16:13,689 mother bullying her during a tennis match. 330 00:16:13,690 --> 00:16:15,084 You're right about her backhand, by the way... 331 00:16:15,084 --> 00:16:16,521 - it's appalling. - VANESSA: You're telling me 332 00:16:16,521 --> 00:16:18,957 - how to speak to Gretchen? - JIMMY: You've never spoken to 333 00:16:18,957 --> 00:16:21,625 the real Gretchen. The real Gretchen runs publicity 334 00:16:21,625 --> 00:16:24,419 for some of the biggest rap acts in town. 335 00:16:24,419 --> 00:16:28,137 The real Gretchen doesn't drink milk or take ballet classes. 336 00:16:28,137 --> 00:16:30,506 In fact, she just cancelled her gym membership so she'd have 337 00:16:30,506 --> 00:16:32,556 - money for cigarettes. - FRED: You smoke? 338 00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:34,997 JIMMY: Sure, she hasn't been to the dentist in years and 339 00:16:34,997 --> 00:16:40,628 lives off 7-Eleven hot dogs, but she is brave and spontaneous. 340 00:16:40,628 --> 00:16:44,643 And that Gretchen is so paralyzed with the fear of 341 00:16:44,643 --> 00:16:48,064 disappointing you that you don't actually know her at all. 342 00:16:48,064 --> 00:16:50,732 I feel sorry for you two. You will never know the 343 00:16:50,732 --> 00:16:55,893 brilliant, beautiful mess that is your daughter. 344 00:17:00,615 --> 00:17:03,117 (Gretchen chuckles nervously) 345 00:17:07,171 --> 00:17:11,349 - GRETCHEN: Daddy, I... - FRED: (Sighs) Just take us 346 00:17:11,349 --> 00:17:15,228 back to our hotel. And... 347 00:17:15,228 --> 00:17:17,081 finish your milk. 348 00:17:30,701 --> 00:17:33,957 CASEWORKER: I really wish I could help, but funds are tight. 349 00:17:33,957 --> 00:17:36,748 Congress wants to pay for the war, not the casualties. 350 00:17:36,748 --> 00:17:39,446 EDGAR: I'm not asking for a medal or a parade, just a good 351 00:17:39,446 --> 00:17:42,459 - night's sleep. - (Caseworker sighs) 352 00:17:42,576 --> 00:17:46,919 CASEWORKER: Uncle! I give in. (Chuckles) I will fill out your 353 00:17:46,919 --> 00:17:49,137 paperwork and find the money for your meds. 354 00:17:49,137 --> 00:17:50,681 - EDGAR: Thank you. - CASEWORKER: Where is it that 355 00:17:50,681 --> 00:17:52,463 - you're living? - EDGAR: Uh, Silver Lake. 356 00:17:52,463 --> 00:17:55,291 CASEWORKER: Silver Lake. Ooh-la-la. 357 00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:59,514 Hey, Jerry, bad news, you're gonna have to turn in your hook. 358 00:17:59,514 --> 00:18:01,654 JERRY: But-but I use it to pick things up. 359 00:18:01,654 --> 00:18:03,157 CASEWORKER: No, man. Stuff's gonna stay on the 360 00:18:03,157 --> 00:18:05,713 ground. This hipster's having bad 361 00:18:05,713 --> 00:18:07,233 "dweams." 362 00:18:14,925 --> 00:18:16,876 EDGAR: I didn't... 363 00:18:21,532 --> 00:18:25,368 - (Gunfire over TV) - (Knocking) 364 00:18:28,238 --> 00:18:30,299 GRETCHEN: Why would you do that?! 365 00:18:30,299 --> 00:18:32,526 My dad didn't say another word to me in the car, and now 366 00:18:32,526 --> 00:18:34,608 they're changing their flight so they leave tomorrow! 367 00:18:34,608 --> 00:18:36,440 - What is wrong with you?! - JIMMY: Sorry, wouldn't you 368 00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:39,123 rather have a fractured, combative relationship with your 369 00:18:39,123 --> 00:18:43,418 parents that's based on truth than this pleasant artificial 370 00:18:43,418 --> 00:18:45,237 - relationship based on lies? - GRETCHEN: No. 371 00:18:45,237 --> 00:18:46,943 JIMMY: Well, then you should've been more explicit 372 00:18:46,943 --> 00:18:49,222 - about that. - GRETCHEN: They're my family! 373 00:18:49,222 --> 00:18:52,350 I get to lie to them till I'm old and they're dead, and you 374 00:18:52,350 --> 00:18:54,306 don't get a vote! I would never tell your dad to 375 00:18:54,306 --> 00:18:55,720 - read your book. - JIMMY: Yeah, because he 376 00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,051 wouldn't let you through the door 'cause you're a redhead and 377 00:18:58,051 --> 00:19:00,859 he's hated the Irish ever since the IRA blew up his favorite 378 00:19:00,859 --> 00:19:03,020 chip shop. Look, I'm sorry. 379 00:19:03,020 --> 00:19:05,663 - Forgive me for valuing honesty. - GRETCHEN: This is about you 380 00:19:05,663 --> 00:19:08,609 controlling and bullying everybody to behave the way you 381 00:19:08,609 --> 00:19:10,997 think they should. I knew you were insensitive and 382 00:19:10,997 --> 00:19:13,158 manipulative, but you're mean, Jimmy. 383 00:19:13,158 --> 00:19:17,087 - You're a mean person. - JIMMY: Well, at least I am a person! 384 00:19:23,977 --> 00:19:25,761 (Sniffles) 385 00:19:28,865 --> 00:19:30,833 (Sniffles) 386 00:19:51,740 --> 00:19:53,740 387 00:20:10,006 --> 00:20:11,744 - JIMMY: Hey, um... - GRETCHEN: I'm done. 388 00:20:11,744 --> 00:20:13,510 - I'm tagging out. - JIMMY: What? 389 00:20:13,510 --> 00:20:15,880 - Of-of this argument? - GRETCHEN: No, Jimmy. 390 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:17,967 Of this. I told you I don't do 391 00:20:17,967 --> 00:20:20,988 relationships, and yet here we are in one. 392 00:20:20,988 --> 00:20:25,441 I feel... I feel like this train is speeding up, and this may be 393 00:20:25,441 --> 00:20:28,586 my last chance to hop off before any serious injury. 394 00:20:28,586 --> 00:20:30,360 JIMMY: Speak English. 395 00:20:32,679 --> 00:20:37,396 GRETCHEN: Good-bye, Jimmy. Sorry! 396 00:20:37,396 --> 00:20:39,469 You're right, I'm not a person. 397 00:20:42,506 --> 00:20:44,307 (Door slams) 398 00:20:49,546 --> 00:20:53,733 PAUL: Those three stars are Orion's Belt. 399 00:20:53,733 --> 00:20:57,856 See how he looks like a man with a club? 400 00:20:57,856 --> 00:20:59,192 (Australian accent): G'day, Linds. 401 00:20:59,192 --> 00:21:04,996 - I'm Orion, the mighty hunter. - (Both laugh) 402 00:21:07,331 --> 00:21:10,200 - Hmm. What was that for? - LINDSAY: Nothing. 403 00:21:10,367 --> 00:21:15,563 Just... you. You weirdo. 404 00:21:15,563 --> 00:21:17,123 (Phone chimes) 405 00:21:20,294 --> 00:21:24,278 (Gasps) I'm sorry. I have to go. 406 00:21:24,278 --> 00:21:27,843 Gretchen needs me. Thanks for the day. 407 00:21:27,843 --> 00:21:29,720 Have fun with your stars. 408 00:21:34,807 --> 00:21:38,510 PAUL: They're everyone's stars. 409 00:21:46,970 --> 00:21:52,642 - (Door opens, closes) - EDGAR: Where's Gretchen? 410 00:21:52,676 --> 00:21:57,959 - And why are you cooking? - JIMMY: It's over. 411 00:21:57,959 --> 00:22:00,760 Lasted longer than anyone would've guessed, huh? 412 00:22:00,760 --> 00:22:04,963 EDGAR: No. What happened? 413 00:22:04,963 --> 00:22:06,414 JIMMY: Uh, can we not talk about it? 414 00:22:06,414 --> 00:22:09,425 I-I need to just... just not. 415 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,929 (Sighs) You hungry? 416 00:22:12,929 --> 00:22:15,193 EDGAR: Yeah, I-I could eat. 417 00:22:20,253 --> 00:22:21,767 JIMMY: No go on the pills, huh? 418 00:22:21,767 --> 00:22:24,730 - EDGAR: (Scoffs) Nope. - JIMMY: We'll go down there 419 00:22:24,730 --> 00:22:28,130 - tomorrow and sort it out. - EDGAR: R-Really? 420 00:22:28,130 --> 00:22:29,779 Thanks. 421 00:22:32,232 --> 00:22:34,266 JIMMY: I have no idea how to cook. 422 00:22:34,300 --> 00:22:37,241 EDGAR: What have you been doing all this time? 423 00:22:37,241 --> 00:22:41,149 JIMMY: Just, uh, stirring ketchup in the pan. 424 00:22:41,149 --> 00:22:47,480 EDGAR: Okay. Okay. Um... that's a good base. 425 00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:48,496 - JIMMY: Yeah? - EDGAR: Yeah. 426 00:22:48,496 --> 00:22:51,423 Uh, pinch of salt, throw it in there. 427 00:22:51,423 --> 00:22:53,680 - JIMMY: Pinch-pinch of salt. - EDGAR: And then add a little 428 00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:56,945 bit of, uh, olive oil, two, three counts worth. 429 00:22:56,945 --> 00:22:59,326 Now stir it in. Stir it in nice and gently. Stir it. 430 00:22:59,326 --> 00:23:02,278 And, uh, keep stirring, keep stirring. 431 00:23:02,278 --> 00:23:05,278 Sync and corrections by explosiveskull www.addic7ed.com 432 00:23:05,328 --> 00:23:09,878 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 35838

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.