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1
00:00:01,150 --> 00:00:04,680
[rock music]
2
00:00:04,740 --> 00:00:07,100
[door slams]
3
00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:09,490
4
00:00:09,530 --> 00:00:10,490
Ooh!
5
00:00:10,530 --> 00:00:15,450
6
00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:16,530
(woman)
You're the lion
7
00:00:16,580 --> 00:00:18,920
That I'm taming
8
00:00:18,950 --> 00:00:22,420
And now I'm not the same
9
00:00:22,450 --> 00:00:25,420
We're swinging in the jungle, baby
10
00:00:25,460 --> 00:00:29,290
You're my Tarzan, and I'm your Jane
11
00:00:29,340 --> 00:00:31,710
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
12
00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:36,270
Oh, I'm wild for you
13
00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:38,800
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
14
00:00:38,850 --> 00:00:43,310
Oh, I'm wild for you
15
00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:46,440
Wild for you
16
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:51,820
17
00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:53,070
[bed cracks]
18
00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:55,620
[both laughing]
19
00:00:55,650 --> 00:00:58,040
(woman)
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
20
00:00:58,070 --> 00:01:01,880
Oh, I'm wild for you
21
00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:09,050
Good morning.
22
00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:11,380
Good morning.
23
00:01:16,140 --> 00:01:18,220
[laughs]
24
00:01:18,260 --> 00:01:20,590
I can't see out my window.
25
00:01:20,650 --> 00:01:23,480
That's right. You broke the bed.
26
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:26,850
I... I did... You broke your bed.
27
00:01:26,900 --> 00:01:29,270
I was just along for the ride.
28
00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:30,900
[sighs]
29
00:01:30,940 --> 00:01:35,240
So tell me about your first ride.
30
00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:36,860
[laughs] My first ride?
31
00:01:36,910 --> 00:01:38,410
Yeah.
32
00:01:38,450 --> 00:01:42,170
- You're really asking me that?
- Mm-hmm.
33
00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:43,530
Tom Amoroso.
34
00:01:43,590 --> 00:01:46,620
- Tom Amoroso.
- Yeah.
35
00:01:46,670 --> 00:01:49,340
He took me to a Nirvana concert.
36
00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:51,170
We got drunk, did it for two minutes
37
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in his dad's Pontiac Sunfire.
38
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Nirvana... What were you, five?
39
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Uh...
40
00:01:57,380 --> 00:01:59,720
It was a reunion concert.
41
00:01:59,770 --> 00:02:01,130
It was, like, a one night only thing.
42
00:02:01,190 --> 00:02:03,940
They had this hologram of Kurt Cobain.
43
00:02:03,970 --> 00:02:05,220
When was this?
44
00:02:05,270 --> 00:02:07,060
Josh...
45
00:02:07,110 --> 00:02:09,030
Oh, man.
46
00:02:09,060 --> 00:02:12,280
How do I say this?
47
00:02:12,310 --> 00:02:15,110
This is the easy, uncomplicated part.
48
00:02:15,150 --> 00:02:17,450
Let's not... Let's don't weigh things down
49
00:02:17,490 --> 00:02:21,900
with talk of past or future.
50
00:02:24,040 --> 00:02:26,790
Let's think of ourselves as, um...
51
00:02:26,830 --> 00:02:29,130
a couple of Buddhist monks
52
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:30,660
just living in the present moment.
53
00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:32,420
Monks.
54
00:02:32,470 --> 00:02:35,130
Well, monks who have dedicated
their lives to lots of sex.
55
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Mm.
56
00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:39,920
So stay in the present
57
00:02:39,970 --> 00:02:41,260
and have lots of sex.
58
00:02:41,310 --> 00:02:42,430
Mm.
59
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,760
I could probably be persuaded.
60
00:02:44,810 --> 00:02:46,680
That's very big of you. Thank you.
61
00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:52,270
Speaking of things that are big of me...
62
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:53,690
Seriously?
63
00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:55,740
[upbeat rock music]
64
00:02:55,770 --> 00:02:57,270
(man)
Whoa, oh, oh
65
00:02:57,330 --> 00:02:59,160
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
66
00:02:59,190 --> 00:03:00,610
Whoa, oh, oh
67
00:03:00,660 --> 00:03:02,700
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
68
00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:04,450
Whoa, oh, oh
69
00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:06,280
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
70
00:03:06,330 --> 00:03:09,920
Wild for you
71
00:03:09,950 --> 00:03:11,750
Whoa, oh, oh
72
00:03:11,790 --> 00:03:13,090
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
73
00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:14,760
[video game explosions]
74
00:03:14,790 --> 00:03:16,930
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
75
00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:18,630
Whoa, oh, oh
76
00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:20,460
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh
77
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:24,430
Wild for you
78
00:03:24,470 --> 00:03:28,860
I am now officially acting
like a 26-year-old monster.
79
00:03:28,890 --> 00:03:29,860
You had sex with him.
80
00:03:29,890 --> 00:03:31,640
Eh...
81
00:03:31,690 --> 00:03:34,440
Not sex per se, at least not
sex as I have come to know it.
82
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,310
[giggling] Because it was such good sex.
83
00:03:37,370 --> 00:03:38,780
Yeah?
84
00:03:38,820 --> 00:03:40,280
You know that thing that people describe
85
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:41,730
when they're having a near-death experience
86
00:03:41,790 --> 00:03:43,200
where they're floating above their bodies
87
00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:44,650
and can see themselves
on the operating table?
88
00:03:44,710 --> 00:03:45,660
- Yeah.
- I had that.
89
00:03:45,710 --> 00:03:47,120
- Really?
- Yeah.
90
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:49,130
Except instead of watching
someone give me CPR,
91
00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:50,800
I was watching myself in sexual positions
92
00:03:50,830 --> 00:03:52,410
I thought were only theoretical.
93
00:03:52,460 --> 00:03:54,750
Ooh, fantastic. Congratulations.
94
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,630
No, it's complicating everything.
95
00:03:56,670 --> 00:03:58,170
I went over there to tell him the truth,
96
00:03:58,220 --> 00:03:59,249
and then I didn't tell him,
97
00:03:59,250 --> 00:04:00,919
and then I was gonna tell him this morning,
98
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:01,970
but the sex was so good
99
00:04:02,010 --> 00:04:03,310
that I realized that if I told him,
100
00:04:03,340 --> 00:04:04,720
I might not have sex with him again,
101
00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:06,259
and I really wanted to
have sex with him again,
102
00:04:06,260 --> 00:04:07,730
and then I did have sex with him again.
103
00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:09,400
And this is why I'm a monster,
104
00:04:09,430 --> 00:04:11,850
some kind of stealth cougar monster.
105
00:04:11,900 --> 00:04:13,820
Liza, you don't have to
do this to yourself.
106
00:04:13,850 --> 00:04:15,230
And you don't have to tell him.
107
00:04:15,270 --> 00:04:17,240
What am I supposed to do,
just keep lying to the guy?
108
00:04:17,270 --> 00:04:18,940
He's having sex. You're not hurting him.
109
00:04:18,990 --> 00:04:20,490
I mean, you're not hurting him, are you?
110
00:04:20,530 --> 00:04:21,820
- Is he into that?
- No.
111
00:04:21,860 --> 00:04:23,660
So why don't you just
enjoy yourself for awhile?
112
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:25,190
What's so hard about that?
113
00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:26,360
Nothing.
114
00:04:26,410 --> 00:04:28,920
Everything. You have no idea.
115
00:04:34,290 --> 00:04:37,090
I am very happy to announce that Empirical
116
00:04:37,130 --> 00:04:39,130
is now officially the publishing house
117
00:04:39,180 --> 00:04:41,960
for the English translation
of Anton Bjornberg's
118
00:04:42,010 --> 00:04:43,050
Kaleidoscope of Life.
119
00:04:43,100 --> 00:04:44,760
We signed the Swede.
120
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:47,380
[applause]
121
00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:49,020
Now, we're on a tight launch for the fall,
122
00:04:49,050 --> 00:04:50,850
which will be not a small challenge,
123
00:04:50,890 --> 00:04:52,360
because the preliminary translation
124
00:04:52,390 --> 00:04:54,190
might as well be in Swedish.
125
00:04:54,230 --> 00:04:56,810
But I start working with Anton
first thing in the morning,
126
00:04:56,860 --> 00:04:59,400
and I'm confident that we
can meet that deadline.
127
00:04:59,450 --> 00:05:02,320
So I will need marketing and cover artwork
128
00:05:02,370 --> 00:05:03,900
by the end of this week.
129
00:05:03,950 --> 00:05:06,790
Great. That's all from me.
130
00:05:06,820 --> 00:05:08,290
Damn, girl.
131
00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,160
If I didn't know you, I'd be impressed.
132
00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:12,330
I definitely want you on my marketing team.
133
00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:14,080
I'm gonna take you under my wing.
134
00:05:14,130 --> 00:05:16,210
Kelsey, congratulations.
135
00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:17,630
I don't know how you did it,
136
00:05:17,670 --> 00:05:19,130
but you did.
137
00:05:19,170 --> 00:05:20,170
I'm here if you need me.
138
00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:22,250
Liza.
139
00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:23,300
You're da bomb.
140
00:05:23,340 --> 00:05:24,720
We celebrate tonight, big.
141
00:05:29,810 --> 00:05:32,510
(Liza) To our newest star editor.
142
00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:34,760
I still have to deliver on the book.
143
00:05:34,820 --> 00:05:36,400
Well, that ain't no thing...
144
00:05:36,430 --> 00:05:37,730
[laughs]
145
00:05:37,770 --> 00:05:39,350
For you to do...
146
00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,400
I cannot believe this is the same girl
147
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:42,840
I used to have slumber parties with
148
00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:44,160
and talk about how we were gonna marry
149
00:05:44,190 --> 00:05:46,860
Jonathan Taylor Thomas or Andrew Keegan.
150
00:05:46,910 --> 00:05:49,360
Oh, my God. We were obsessed.
151
00:05:49,410 --> 00:05:51,080
Wait. Which one were you?
152
00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:52,160
Which what, now?
153
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,080
Who'd you like better?
154
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:55,920
Oh, uh, Keegan.
155
00:05:55,950 --> 00:05:57,120
- Oh.
- Ugh.
156
00:05:57,170 --> 00:05:58,290
Liza.
157
00:05:58,340 --> 00:05:59,420
Oh, yeah. I know.
158
00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:00,590
Yeah, I was a Keeger.
159
00:06:00,630 --> 00:06:02,840
Oh, no. JT squared all the way.
160
00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:03,840
No contest.
161
00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,260
By the way,
162
00:06:05,300 --> 00:06:07,600
we could so bang Jonathan
Taylor Thomas now.
163
00:06:07,630 --> 00:06:09,020
- Yeah, we could.
- Yeah.
164
00:06:09,050 --> 00:06:11,680
Yeah, how have we not banged him yet?
165
00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,890
Find out who Jonathan
Taylor Thomas' publicist is,
166
00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:15,470
see if I can bang him.
167
00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:18,060
Also, Mark-Paul Gosselaar.
168
00:06:18,110 --> 00:06:20,230
Also, Tiffani Amber Thiessen.
169
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,530
To Kels-Bells,
170
00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:24,450
all grown up and taking over the world.
171
00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:26,230
Uh-huh.
172
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:27,870
Hey, don't let me drink too much tonight.
173
00:06:27,900 --> 00:06:29,990
Okay, I have to be sharp
for Bjornberg tomorrow.
174
00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:33,040
I get past a certain point, it's not cute.
175
00:06:33,070 --> 00:06:34,160
Don't worry. I got your back.
176
00:06:34,210 --> 00:06:35,910
You're my girl.
177
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,040
(Thad) Hey, hey. What's up, ladies?
178
00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:40,160
Babe, I thought you had to work.
179
00:06:40,210 --> 00:06:42,250
I pawned a few things
off on the assistants,
180
00:06:42,300 --> 00:06:43,250
but it's fine.
181
00:06:43,300 --> 00:06:44,250
They have it all.
182
00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:45,820
Perfect timing. You can have my chair.
183
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:46,970
(all) What?
184
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,340
I know. I know. It's tragic.
185
00:06:48,390 --> 00:06:49,920
I got to jet to this party in Crown Heights
186
00:06:49,970 --> 00:06:51,720
where they're serving
sushi off cisgender models.
187
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:52,890
- What?
- Don't ask.
188
00:06:52,930 --> 00:06:54,090
I love you. I am so proud of you.
189
00:06:54,150 --> 00:06:55,340
Muah. Muah. Love you.
190
00:06:59,730 --> 00:07:00,730
So you remember Liza?
191
00:07:00,740 --> 00:07:01,680
Who?
192
00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:03,740
Oh. Yeah, hi.
193
00:07:03,770 --> 00:07:05,400
Hi. What a pleasant surprise.
194
00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:08,020
Well, I couldn't miss my girl's big night.
195
00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:10,330
Oh, is there skinny margaritas?
196
00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:11,940
- Yes.
- For a celebration?
197
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,700
Boo, fail, hey.
198
00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:16,700
Bro, shotskis over here. Tequila.
199
00:07:18,340 --> 00:07:19,870
I'm so happy you're here.
200
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:21,590
Yeah. Congratulations.
201
00:07:21,620 --> 00:07:22,590
Thank you.
202
00:07:22,620 --> 00:07:24,290
Hm. All right.
203
00:07:24,340 --> 00:07:27,680
[glasses clinking]
204
00:07:27,710 --> 00:07:28,680
Ooh.
205
00:07:28,710 --> 00:07:30,380
Another round.
206
00:07:30,430 --> 00:07:33,550
Uh, actually, I think that might
be enough for Kelsey and me.
207
00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:35,550
What? You're kidding, right?
208
00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:37,940
Oh, she asked me not to let
her drink too much tonight,
209
00:07:37,970 --> 00:07:39,470
so maybe we should cool it on the shots.
210
00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:41,560
Whoa, I thought this was
gonna be a celebration.
211
00:07:41,610 --> 00:07:43,560
Who invited the fun police?
212
00:07:43,610 --> 00:07:44,610
Don't stress.
213
00:07:44,650 --> 00:07:46,030
I know you girls make garbage money.
214
00:07:46,060 --> 00:07:47,650
I'll pick up the tab.
215
00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:49,230
I'm not worried about who's gonna pay.
216
00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,649
I'm worried about her meeting
with her author in the morning,
217
00:07:51,650 --> 00:07:52,989
which is important.
218
00:07:52,990 --> 00:07:54,790
Sweetie, I move $50
million in paper each day.
219
00:07:54,820 --> 00:07:56,240
You don't see me ruining
220
00:07:56,290 --> 00:07:58,240
everybody else's good time, do you?
221
00:07:58,290 --> 00:08:00,630
Come on. You deserve it.
222
00:08:00,660 --> 00:08:03,250
Okay. Just this one.
223
00:08:03,300 --> 00:08:04,960
Okay, and then water.
224
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,380
That's my ride-or-die bitch.
225
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:08,470
[laughs]
226
00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:10,750
Mm.
227
00:08:10,810 --> 00:08:12,810
- Another round.
- Whoo.
228
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,590
You can't leave a shot on the table.
229
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,980
Liza, party foul.
230
00:08:17,010 --> 00:08:19,060
Kelsey.
231
00:08:19,100 --> 00:08:20,910
Okay, can we please get some waters?
232
00:08:21,581 --> 00:08:23,021
Uno.
233
00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:26,082
- Dos.
- Yeah.
234
00:08:26,850 --> 00:08:28,480
Yeah, that's cinco.
235
00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:31,020
(man)
Don't stop us tonight
236
00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:32,900
[upbeat dance music]
237
00:08:32,940 --> 00:08:34,320
Ooh!
[shudders]
238
00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:36,110
Okay, remember how you said
you pass a point
239
00:08:36,410 --> 00:08:37,659
where it's not cute?
240
00:08:37,660 --> 00:08:39,030
Oh, yeah. [laughs]
241
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:40,690
I think I just passed that point.
242
00:08:40,750 --> 00:08:42,750
[both laughing]
243
00:08:45,310 --> 00:08:46,860
(woman)
Ready, set, go
244
00:08:46,890 --> 00:08:48,310
We don't stop until we're done
245
00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:49,860
Take your places on the floor
246
00:08:49,890 --> 00:08:51,730
Start it, three, two, one
247
00:08:52,310 --> 00:08:54,400
Ah, love this song.
248
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:55,480
[laughs]
249
00:08:55,530 --> 00:08:56,650
[Thad grunts]
250
00:08:56,700 --> 00:08:58,280
Hello.
251
00:08:58,320 --> 00:08:59,780
Have I met you before?
252
00:08:59,820 --> 00:09:01,650
Uh-huh.
253
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:03,290
Okeydoke. That's my cue.
254
00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:04,290
All right. Come on.
255
00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:05,370
Yeah, we should go home.
256
00:09:05,410 --> 00:09:06,820
- Yep.
- Home?
257
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:09,040
What? We're just getting started.
258
00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:10,040
I know what we're gonna do.
259
00:09:10,080 --> 00:09:11,160
[laughs]
260
00:09:11,210 --> 00:09:12,380
Oh, this is gonna be so genius.
261
00:09:12,420 --> 00:09:14,250
We're gonna go.
262
00:09:14,300 --> 00:09:16,550
We're gonna see that guy that
Liza's been seeing, Jeremy.
263
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:18,340
- Josh?
- Josh.
264
00:09:18,390 --> 00:09:20,050
We're gonna go see Josh
at his tattoo parlor
265
00:09:20,090 --> 00:09:22,220
in Brooklyn, and we're
all gonna get tattoos.
266
00:09:22,260 --> 00:09:23,660
Babe, you know I don't do Brooklyn.
267
00:09:23,680 --> 00:09:25,060
- No offense.
- Lots taken.
268
00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:27,260
Too late. I already ordered the Uber.
269
00:09:27,310 --> 00:09:28,400
[sighs]
270
00:09:28,430 --> 00:09:30,060
This is gonna be epic.
271
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:33,180
I'm gonna commemorate my first acquisition.
272
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:35,150
I got to do something Swedish.
273
00:09:35,190 --> 00:09:37,740
Like, a little Volvo on my left boob
274
00:09:37,770 --> 00:09:39,820
or... or a meatball.
275
00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:41,440
Okay. Thad's going home.
276
00:09:41,490 --> 00:09:43,360
I'm going home. We're all going home.
277
00:09:43,410 --> 00:09:45,160
Oh, I thought I was your ride-or-die bitch.
278
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:47,870
You are, especially if
that ride's going back
279
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:48,920
to my place right now.
280
00:09:48,950 --> 00:09:51,290
No. Tattoos.
281
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:53,090
Fine. I'm out of here.
282
00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:54,960
What? Fine.
283
00:09:55,010 --> 00:09:57,380
Go home and finish binging Gilmore Girls.
284
00:09:57,430 --> 00:10:00,290
He loves that show.
285
00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:01,880
Our Uber's here.
286
00:10:01,930 --> 00:10:02,930
[squeals] Let's go.
287
00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:04,630
Oh.
288
00:10:04,680 --> 00:10:06,100
(man)
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
289
00:10:06,140 --> 00:10:07,520
(man)
I'm a player, baby
290
00:10:07,550 --> 00:10:08,889
I can't believe Thad didn't come.
291
00:10:08,890 --> 00:10:11,060
That might have been the
smartest thing Thad's ever done.
292
00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:12,640
Listen to me, right now
293
00:10:12,690 --> 00:10:14,480
you need to be more
concerned about your meeting
294
00:10:14,530 --> 00:10:15,970
with Anton Bjornberg in the morning.
295
00:10:15,980 --> 00:10:16,980
Bjornberg?
296
00:10:17,030 --> 00:10:20,280
[laughs] He's so cute.
297
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:22,030
Oh.
298
00:10:22,070 --> 00:10:23,730
I mean,
299
00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:26,790
look at those smoldering eyes.
300
00:10:26,820 --> 00:10:28,960
They're very smoldering.
301
00:10:28,990 --> 00:10:30,630
Okay, I get it. I know.
302
00:10:30,660 --> 00:10:33,910
You're all sober and blah and snore.
303
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,550
Don't try to tell me
304
00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:37,830
that you're not just a little bit excited
305
00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:39,220
to visit Josh again.
306
00:10:39,250 --> 00:10:41,590
Just teeny, weeny bit.
307
00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:43,800
Just a teeny, weeny, little baby bit.
308
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:44,890
[laughs]
309
00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:46,590
[laughs]
310
00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:47,680
Stop.
311
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:48,810
That's more like it.
312
00:10:48,850 --> 00:10:49,850
[laughs]
313
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:52,350
[groans] He's hot.
314
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,930
"You are hot."
315
00:10:55,990 --> 00:10:57,150
Send.
316
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:59,490
- Uh. Yeah.
- Send?
317
00:10:59,520 --> 00:11:00,910
What do you mean, "send"?
318
00:11:00,940 --> 00:11:02,770
Please tell me you did not just send
319
00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:05,240
our prized new author a text
that says, "You are hot."
320
00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:08,080
Okay. I won't tell you, then.
321
00:11:08,110 --> 00:11:09,110
But I did.
322
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:10,700
[laughs]
323
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:14,450
You should see your face right now.
324
00:11:14,500 --> 00:11:16,000
[laughing]
325
00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,040
(man)
Yo, yo
326
00:11:18,090 --> 00:11:19,510
[Kelsey laughing]
327
00:11:19,540 --> 00:11:21,090
(Liza) All right. Just get out.
328
00:11:21,130 --> 00:11:22,090
(man)
What we gonna do?
329
00:11:22,130 --> 00:11:24,260
- Careful.
- Oh, no.
330
00:11:24,300 --> 00:11:26,140
(Liza) All right, see,
I told you. It's closed.
331
00:11:26,180 --> 00:11:27,770
How is this even possible?
332
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,350
'Cause it's after midnight on a weekday,
333
00:11:29,390 --> 00:11:30,600
and he's not a coke dealer.
334
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:31,970
All right, can we get in the cab now?
335
00:11:32,020 --> 00:11:33,550
Come on, let's go. Let...
336
00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:35,690
Wait. Wait. Okay, wait, wait.
Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
337
00:11:35,730 --> 00:11:37,140
Didn't you tell me that he lived here?
338
00:11:37,190 --> 00:11:39,780
You did. You... I know it. I know it.
339
00:11:39,810 --> 00:11:41,310
He lives right there.
340
00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:43,150
But he's obviously out or already asleep.
341
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,230
- Okay, well, call him.
- No, that's not gonna happen.
342
00:11:45,290 --> 00:11:46,570
No, call him.
343
00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:47,700
- Call him.
- Stop.
344
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:48,860
I didn't come all the way...
345
00:11:48,870 --> 00:11:50,319
- Stop! Stop!
- [yelps]
346
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:51,790
I didn't come here to not get a tattoo!
347
00:11:51,820 --> 00:11:52,990
Call him!
348
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,880
No, I don't want to bother him.
349
00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:57,130
Josh!
350
00:11:57,160 --> 00:11:58,410
Stop it.
351
00:11:58,460 --> 00:12:00,210
Seriously, are you... are you insane?
352
00:12:00,250 --> 00:12:01,880
- I'm sorry.
- Will you please...
353
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:04,420
(Liza) Oh, my gosh. You can't do that.
354
00:12:04,470 --> 00:12:05,550
- Are you crazy?
- Wake up!
355
00:12:05,590 --> 00:12:06,750
Are you insane? Stop it.
356
00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:08,590
[Kelsey babbling indistinctly]
357
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:12,010
[both yelling at once]
358
00:12:12,060 --> 00:12:13,010
Ha!
359
00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,010
[glass shatters]
360
00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:16,060
[gasps]
361
00:12:22,660 --> 00:12:25,106
[retching]
362
00:12:26,940 --> 00:12:28,070
Liza.
363
00:12:28,100 --> 00:12:29,100
[sighs] I'm so sorry.
364
00:12:29,150 --> 00:12:30,490
My friend's really drunk,
365
00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:32,440
and she just threw a
rock through your window.
366
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:34,360
I'm so much better now.
367
00:12:34,410 --> 00:12:35,410
I'm going back inside.
368
00:12:37,580 --> 00:12:38,860
- Liza...
- Uh, no.
369
00:12:38,910 --> 00:12:40,200
We shouldn't have come.
370
00:12:40,250 --> 00:12:41,860
- Um...
- I'm gonna get a tattoo.
371
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:43,700
No, we're gonna, uh...
I'll pay for that window.
372
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:45,080
All right. It's okay. Taxi!
373
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:46,540
(Kelsey) Wait. I didn't get a tattoo.
374
00:12:46,590 --> 00:12:48,790
Liza, will you just wait
one second, please?
375
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:50,420
I have to get her home, okay?
376
00:12:50,460 --> 00:12:52,290
[sighs]
377
00:12:54,260 --> 00:12:56,850
(Liza) You and all the tequila you drank
378
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,299
need to get in that cab this instant!
379
00:12:58,300 --> 00:12:59,300
- [yelps]
- Get in there!
380
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:00,300
(Kelsey) Okay.
381
00:13:00,350 --> 00:13:01,350
(Josh) Liza.
382
00:13:04,770 --> 00:13:05,770
Liza.
383
00:13:11,060 --> 00:13:12,140
Two years of no sex.
384
00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:13,480
And the second I dip my toe back in,
385
00:13:13,530 --> 00:13:15,310
this is what I get.
386
00:13:15,370 --> 00:13:17,230
I mean, it's not like I
have any claims on the guy.
387
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:19,230
I mean, I'm the one who
said, "Let's keep it light."
388
00:13:19,290 --> 00:13:20,700
It's just... I just can't believe
389
00:13:20,740 --> 00:13:22,490
that he would jump into
bed with somebody else
390
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:23,990
right after he'd been with me.
391
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,040
Doesn't his penis ever need a break?
392
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,040
[laughs] Welcome to 26.
393
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:31,050
That moment when I saw them together,
394
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,380
my stomach just dropped.
395
00:13:33,420 --> 00:13:35,130
Maybe I was wrong.
396
00:13:35,170 --> 00:13:38,090
Maybe this is more than just fun.
397
00:13:38,140 --> 00:13:39,840
No, it's definitely not fun anymore.
398
00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:50,070
[phone alarm buzzing, dinging]
399
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:54,600
[groans]
400
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:57,610
[groans]
401
00:14:01,610 --> 00:14:03,750
(Kelsey) Hey, it's Kelsey.
Don't leave a message.
402
00:14:03,780 --> 00:14:05,080
I never check this.
403
00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:06,080
[voice mail beeps]
404
00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:07,580
Kelsey, where are you?
405
00:14:07,620 --> 00:14:09,250
Bjornberg is here.
406
00:14:09,290 --> 00:14:11,250
(Diana) Liza.
407
00:14:11,290 --> 00:14:12,960
Why is Anton Bjornberg sitting by himself
408
00:14:13,010 --> 00:14:14,590
in our conference room?
409
00:14:14,630 --> 00:14:17,130
Uh, he's here for his
first meeting with Kelsey.
410
00:14:17,180 --> 00:14:20,710
Well, that explains why he's
sitting in our conference room,
411
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:22,630
but not the "by himself" part.
412
00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:24,220
Kelsey has been slightly delayed.
413
00:14:24,270 --> 00:14:25,630
How delayed?
414
00:14:25,690 --> 00:14:27,190
That is undetermined at this time.
415
00:14:27,220 --> 00:14:29,560
What are you, the White
House press secretary?
416
00:14:29,610 --> 00:14:32,610
If you don't tell me, I can't fix it.
417
00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:33,780
[sighs]
418
00:14:33,810 --> 00:14:35,390
She was worked up about today
419
00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:36,780
and nervous about the deal,
420
00:14:36,810 --> 00:14:38,730
so I gave her some Ambien.
421
00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:42,570
There is a slight possibility
she may still be asleep.
422
00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:43,740
Oh, dear God.
423
00:14:46,660 --> 00:14:48,370
Anton. Diana Trout, head of marketing.
424
00:14:48,410 --> 00:14:49,830
- Hello.
- Hi.
425
00:14:49,880 --> 00:14:52,660
This is my associate, Liza... something.
426
00:14:52,710 --> 00:14:54,750
Kelsey's been slightly detained.
427
00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:57,380
Uh, let's chat a bit about marketing.
428
00:14:57,420 --> 00:14:59,590
I'd be very interested in your input.
429
00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:01,670
My input is I don't care about marketing.
430
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:04,060
And if you understood
anything about my work,
431
00:15:04,090 --> 00:15:05,590
you would know that about me.
432
00:15:07,390 --> 00:15:10,310
You know what, perhaps
I've made a mistake here.
433
00:15:25,950 --> 00:15:28,080
Hey, I'm here. I'm here.
434
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,110
Oh, good, because he's gone
435
00:15:29,170 --> 00:15:31,030
along with his book, probably.
436
00:15:31,090 --> 00:15:33,500
What? You guys couldn't have
kept him here for five minutes?
437
00:15:33,540 --> 00:15:36,960
I tried, started talking
to him about marketing.
438
00:15:37,010 --> 00:15:39,540
God, that's... that's the worst
thing you could have done.
439
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:40,960
Really?
440
00:15:41,010 --> 00:15:42,680
Worse than not showing up?
441
00:15:42,710 --> 00:15:44,460
I don't think so.
442
00:15:47,690 --> 00:15:49,430
We really did try to stall him.
443
00:15:49,470 --> 00:15:51,770
Liza, seriously, I thought
you had my back last night.
444
00:15:51,810 --> 00:15:53,390
Thanks for nothing.
445
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:55,190
What?
446
00:15:55,230 --> 00:15:57,440
I told you to not let me get too drunk.
447
00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:59,730
News flash: I tried my best to stop you.
448
00:15:59,780 --> 00:16:02,030
But you started doing shots like
a Lohan once Thad showed up.
449
00:16:02,070 --> 00:16:04,150
And then you insisted on
going all the way to Brooklyn,
450
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:06,650
dragged me down to Josh's place
for a ridiculous Swedish tattoo,
451
00:16:06,700 --> 00:16:08,370
and then you threw a
rock through his window.
452
00:16:08,410 --> 00:16:10,570
Oh, and I did I mention he was
with another girl at the time?
453
00:16:10,620 --> 00:16:11,820
So thanks for that.
454
00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,460
Well, I don't remember any of that.
455
00:16:13,490 --> 00:16:15,490
And while it does sound awful,
456
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:16,900
if you had been a proper wingwoman,
457
00:16:16,910 --> 00:16:18,910
none of that would have happened.
458
00:16:18,970 --> 00:16:22,220
I don't... I don't even have words
to describe how crazy you sound.
459
00:16:22,250 --> 00:16:23,970
You sound like a 50-year-old.
460
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,500
50? How dare you.
461
00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,170
You know, you asked me to look out for you,
462
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:30,640
and then I do, and you
accuse me of acting...
463
00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:33,430
significantly older than I am.
464
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:36,430
You know, you can rant and
deflect blame all you want,
465
00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:39,400
or you can own this, take
responsibility for it,
466
00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:40,650
and go fix it.
467
00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:46,020
You're right.
468
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:47,830
I'm sorry.
469
00:16:47,860 --> 00:16:49,190
And I'm sorry you had to walk in
470
00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:52,830
on Josh taking some girl to Poundtown.
471
00:16:52,870 --> 00:16:54,330
Technically, I didn't see
472
00:16:54,370 --> 00:16:57,950
any of the actual voyage to Poundtown.
473
00:16:59,670 --> 00:17:00,920
She was really pretty, though.
474
00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:03,180
I bet she's stupid.
475
00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:04,180
She looked stupid.
476
00:17:04,210 --> 00:17:05,260
Like a big stupid cow.
477
00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:06,340
You don't even remember.
478
00:17:16,110 --> 00:17:17,860
[Kelsey sighs]
479
00:17:17,890 --> 00:17:19,890
[bell rings]
480
00:17:23,060 --> 00:17:24,060
Hi.
481
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:27,700
Well, our meeting was two hours ago.
482
00:17:27,740 --> 00:17:29,280
Yeah.
483
00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,450
I was late this morning because signing you
484
00:17:32,490 --> 00:17:34,990
is the biggest thing that
has ever happened to me.
485
00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:37,830
And I was so excited, I
went out to celebrate,
486
00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:39,160
and I got drunk...
487
00:17:39,215 --> 00:17:40,547
really drunk--
488
00:17:40,583 --> 00:17:41,882
and I overslept.
489
00:17:41,917 --> 00:17:43,550
And I'm so sorry.
490
00:17:43,586 --> 00:17:44,668
It won't happen again.
491
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:45,919
I promise you that.
492
00:17:47,723 --> 00:17:49,139
Will this happen again?
493
00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,143
God, no.
No.
494
00:17:53,179 --> 00:17:56,146
That will never
happen again either.
495
00:17:56,182 --> 00:17:58,649
Okay.
496
00:17:58,684 --> 00:17:59,900
I'll see you tomorrow, then.
497
00:17:59,935 --> 00:18:01,268
See you tomorrow.
498
00:18:09,862 --> 00:18:11,445
We both get one mistake.
499
00:18:16,535 --> 00:18:17,584
[laughs]
500
00:18:25,948 --> 00:18:27,127
Hi.
501
00:18:31,100 --> 00:18:32,100
Hey.
502
00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:37,550
All right, so, um...
503
00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:40,390
Listen, she is a girl that I used to date.
504
00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:43,470
And occasionally she still comes over.
505
00:18:43,530 --> 00:18:46,460
And last night, it was unannounced.
506
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:47,650
I'm sorry.
507
00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:49,200
No, I'm sorry.
508
00:18:49,230 --> 00:18:50,870
I was unannounced.
509
00:18:50,900 --> 00:18:52,980
I would have to told you about her sooner,
510
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,120
but you said you didn't want
to talk about the past, so.
511
00:18:55,150 --> 00:18:56,570
And is she?
512
00:18:56,620 --> 00:18:58,320
Not that that's any of my business.
513
00:18:58,370 --> 00:18:59,660
Totally.
514
00:18:59,710 --> 00:19:03,240
Yes.
515
00:19:03,300 --> 00:19:04,250
What about you?
516
00:19:04,300 --> 00:19:05,710
Huh?
517
00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:07,550
What's the story with
your last relationship?
518
00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,580
[chuckles]
519
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,390
It's so boring.
520
00:19:11,420 --> 00:19:13,170
I mean, seriously?
521
00:19:13,220 --> 00:19:16,510
We broke the bed in three different places.
522
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,560
[laughs]
523
00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:20,680
[laughs]
524
00:19:20,730 --> 00:19:24,520
Um...
525
00:19:24,570 --> 00:19:26,680
It was awhile ago.
526
00:19:26,740 --> 00:19:28,690
He was a poet when we met.
527
00:19:28,740 --> 00:19:31,110
He's really talented, actually.
528
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,740
But then life happened,
529
00:19:33,780 --> 00:19:35,160
and he needed to make some money,
530
00:19:35,190 --> 00:19:38,410
so he gave up on his dreams.
531
00:19:38,450 --> 00:19:42,330
I had a relative
532
00:19:42,370 --> 00:19:43,950
become dependent on me,
533
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,340
so, you know, that changed me.
534
00:19:46,370 --> 00:19:49,510
And then he cheated on me, so I left.
535
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:54,550
For India.
536
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:57,210
Yes, for India.
537
00:19:57,270 --> 00:19:59,100
Wow.
538
00:19:59,140 --> 00:20:02,690
That is some heavy stuff
for a college relationship.
539
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:04,940
Well, it was an Ivy League school.
540
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:11,030
Do you think that I can
maybe have another chance?
541
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:15,649
I'm all about second chances.
542
00:20:15,650 --> 00:20:19,650
?Synced & Corrected by Seppuku17?
?www.addic7ed.com?
543
00:20:24,910 --> 00:20:28,380
(woman)
Ooh
544
00:20:28,410 --> 00:20:29,430
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
545
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:34,030
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