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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,740
Marty?
2
00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:09,540
There are customers
waiting in the lounge
3
00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:11,540
and no one bringing
their cars around.
4
00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:13,710
Yeah, I know, Dad. Lowell
just quit this morning.
5
00:00:13,810 --> 00:00:15,580
Of course he did.
6
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,180
It is impossible to keep
employees these days.
7
00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:20,450
Nobody in your
generation wants to work.
8
00:00:20,550 --> 00:00:23,120
Actually, he quit because
he sold a movie script
9
00:00:23,220 --> 00:00:25,720
to Oprah's company, but yeah.
10
00:00:27,260 --> 00:00:29,360
Well, if he wrote it
while he was working here,
11
00:00:29,460 --> 00:00:30,560
I want a percentage.
12
00:00:30,660 --> 00:00:32,260
And your mama get to meet Oprah.
13
00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:33,660
And Gayle.
14
00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:38,100
Mom, you are stressing me out.
15
00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,240
You are making this
a very big deal,
16
00:00:40,340 --> 00:00:42,440
and I got a lot going on.
17
00:00:42,540 --> 00:00:44,410
Mom, I love you. Love you.
18
00:00:44,510 --> 00:00:46,610
Love you, too, but
you're not hearing me!
19
00:00:46,710 --> 00:00:48,880
Yes, but everyone else is.
20
00:00:51,810 --> 00:00:54,280
I let my mom talk
me into coming home
21
00:00:54,380 --> 00:00:55,920
to Calgary for a quick visit,
22
00:00:56,020 --> 00:00:58,620
and suddenly she's throwing
me an enormous baby shower.
23
00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:01,760
Oh. Yes, the pastor's fine.
24
00:01:01,860 --> 00:01:03,230
But the whole congregation?
25
00:01:04,860 --> 00:01:06,430
I love you, too, Mommy.
26
00:01:06,530 --> 00:01:08,130
That woman is gonna
be the death of me.
27
00:01:08,230 --> 00:01:10,070
I told her I did not
want a baby shower.
28
00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:12,500
Well, the baby is gonna need
a lot of stuff when it comes.
29
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,170
Yes, but a free stroller
30
00:01:14,270 --> 00:01:16,230
and bottle warmer isn't
worth me having to explain
31
00:01:16,270 --> 00:01:18,110
to two dozen old ladies
how I accidentally
32
00:01:18,210 --> 00:01:19,640
let some random
dude knock me up.
33
00:01:20,910 --> 00:01:22,610
No offense.
34
00:01:22,710 --> 00:01:24,950
Believe me, I know
how moms can get.
35
00:01:25,050 --> 00:01:27,120
(yells) What? What's wrong?
36
00:01:27,220 --> 00:01:28,880
I forgot to invite your mom.
37
00:01:28,980 --> 00:01:31,050
Oh!
38
00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,696
The shower's tomorrow,
and in another country.
39
00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:35,160
It's okay. It's okay.
40
00:01:35,260 --> 00:01:37,730
Then why did you scream? Did I?
41
00:01:37,830 --> 00:01:38,890
I shouldn't have.
42
00:01:38,990 --> 00:01:40,900
What am I gonna do?
43
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,930
Your mom is never
gonna forgive me.
44
00:01:43,030 --> 00:01:44,770
Courtney, calm down, okay?
45
00:01:44,870 --> 00:01:46,270
(stammers) It's gonna be okay.
46
00:01:46,370 --> 00:01:47,840
This isn't even
her kind of thing.
47
00:01:47,940 --> 00:01:49,180
And it's all the way in Canada.
48
00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:51,540
Trust me, you are
doing her a favor.
49
00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,210
Now she doesn't have to
let you down by saying no.
50
00:01:54,310 --> 00:01:55,780
Are you sure?
51
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,610
Of course I'm sure.
52
00:01:57,710 --> 00:02:00,280
You think I don't
know my own mother?
53
00:02:01,350 --> 00:02:03,950
Okay. All right, you just,
54
00:02:04,050 --> 00:02:05,620
you just, you go
and-and have fun.
55
00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:07,420
And, uh, I'll see you
when you get back.
56
00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:08,860
Okay, okay, thank you.
57
00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:10,260
All right. "Get back"?
58
00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:12,500
Is she going to lunch already?
59
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:14,130
No, Dad, she's going to Canada.
60
00:02:14,230 --> 00:02:15,960
Well, she better
be back in an hour.
61
00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:19,106
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
62
00:02:19,130 --> 00:02:20,500
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
63
00:02:25,370 --> 00:02:27,380
Dinner was fantastic, Gemma.
64
00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:28,710
The steaks were perfect.
65
00:02:28,810 --> 00:02:30,680
Oh, thanks, Tina. Mm-hmm.
66
00:02:30,780 --> 00:02:33,120
Calvin, cognac?
67
00:02:33,220 --> 00:02:35,180
Ah, you're breaking
out the 'yac.
68
00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:36,790
(chuckles)
69
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:39,320
This friendship is
finally paying off.
70
00:02:39,420 --> 00:02:42,360
So, Lamar, am I crazy, or did
you take the bus here tonight?
71
00:02:42,460 --> 00:02:44,030
You're not crazy, Gemma.
72
00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:46,130
The Datsun caught on fire.
73
00:02:46,230 --> 00:02:47,560
Ah, that's a bummer.
74
00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:49,230
And you can't afford
to buy another car
75
00:02:49,330 --> 00:02:50,730
because you can't find a job.
76
00:02:50,830 --> 00:02:53,200
You can't find a job because
he doesn't have a car.
77
00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:54,870
Mm.
78
00:02:54,970 --> 00:02:57,010
It's quite a pickle.
79
00:02:57,970 --> 00:02:59,740
Well, I'd love to
give you a job,
80
00:02:59,840 --> 00:03:01,640
but the school has
a very clear policy
81
00:03:01,740 --> 00:03:03,310
on hiring convicted felons.
82
00:03:03,410 --> 00:03:04,480
You can't.
83
00:03:05,780 --> 00:03:07,020
Damn it.
84
00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:08,220
Just wish we knew someone
85
00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:10,620
who owned a private business.
86
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:14,960
Ah, okay.
87
00:03:15,060 --> 00:03:17,330
I see I've been
suckered by the 'yac.
88
00:03:17,430 --> 00:03:19,060
Mm-hmm.
89
00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:21,700
You guys always talk
about how good people
90
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:23,600
deserve a second chance.
91
00:03:23,700 --> 00:03:26,470
Yes, but not from me, Dave.
92
00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,110
Besides, I can't help.
93
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,770
I don't have any openings.
94
00:03:31,870 --> 00:03:33,810
Yes, you do.
95
00:03:33,910 --> 00:03:35,910
Didn't Lowell the valet
guy just quit this morning?
96
00:03:40,750 --> 00:03:42,850
I had forgotten that.
97
00:03:42,950 --> 00:03:44,190
Yes, Tina.
98
00:03:44,290 --> 00:03:46,960
Thank you so much for
that very timely reminder.
99
00:03:50,290 --> 00:03:53,200
Do you really believe Mama
wouldn't care if she wasn't
100
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:54,460
invited to the baby shower?
101
00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:56,900
Of course she'd care.
She'd be heartbroken.
102
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,700
But that's why she's
never going to find out.
103
00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:01,570
Oh, really, Marty?
104
00:04:01,670 --> 00:04:04,340
This is the same woman who
knew Courtney was pregnant
105
00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:06,040
before Courtney knew
she was pregnant.
106
00:04:06,140 --> 00:04:08,580
I know. I know, I know,
but-but this is different.
107
00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:10,410
The shower's all
the way in Canada.
108
00:04:10,510 --> 00:04:12,110
And she don't know
nobody who's going.
109
00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:13,720
It's not like she
has magical powers.
110
00:04:13,820 --> 00:04:15,450
Marty, baby shower.
111
00:04:15,550 --> 00:04:17,250
She's a witch!
112
00:04:19,820 --> 00:04:21,420
I want to throw
Courtney a shower.
113
00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:22,520
Let's talk dates.
114
00:04:22,590 --> 00:04:24,490
Oh, dates! Yeah.
115
00:04:24,590 --> 00:04:26,600
For-for a future
shower, yes. Yeah.
116
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,400
No! No, no, Courtney doesn't
117
00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:29,876
want a baby shower.
She hates showers.
118
00:04:29,900 --> 00:04:31,500
What kind of person
hates showers?
119
00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,440
Well, she's a millennial and
a Scorpio and a Hufflepuff.
120
00:04:34,540 --> 00:04:36,100
Oh, come on, it'd
be a super fun party
121
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:37,640
where people give you stuff.
122
00:04:37,740 --> 00:04:39,680
I know. She's crazy.
123
00:04:42,410 --> 00:04:44,110
Talk about a milestone.
124
00:04:44,210 --> 00:04:45,986
You know, you never forget
the first day you drop off
125
00:04:46,010 --> 00:04:48,480
your long-lost dad at
his minimum-wage job
126
00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:50,420
just after he gets
out of prison.
127
00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:52,390
It's like a great country song.
128
00:04:53,220 --> 00:04:55,090
Listen, just so
we're clear, Lamar,
129
00:04:55,190 --> 00:04:57,130
there are a few requirements.
130
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:58,990
All right, always keep
your uniform clean,
131
00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,000
be on time and
132
00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:02,670
don't steal anything.
133
00:05:02,770 --> 00:05:03,970
Roger that.
134
00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:09,140
Uh, Calvin, you promised
not to be prejudiced
135
00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:11,770
against a good man who
deserves a second chance.
136
00:05:11,870 --> 00:05:14,080
No, I said I'd give
him a second chance.
137
00:05:14,180 --> 00:05:16,140
I didn't say I wasn't
gonna be prejudiced.
138
00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:17,480
(sighs)
139
00:05:17,580 --> 00:05:18,910
Yo, Marty.
140
00:05:19,010 --> 00:05:20,420
Oh, hey. You're
back from Calgary.
141
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:22,890
Yes, I am so relieved.
It was crazy.
142
00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:26,190
But I survived, and the baby
got a ton of great gifts.
143
00:05:26,290 --> 00:05:29,560
And I made it back in
time for trivia night.
144
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,330
We are going to crush that team
145
00:05:32,430 --> 00:05:35,360
of cocky dental hygienists,
the Flossy Posse? (Scoffs)
146
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:36,870
Boo.
147
00:05:39,030 --> 00:05:41,540
Sorry, di... uh, did
I hear trivia night?
148
00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:44,270
Because I am
fantastic at trivia.
149
00:05:44,370 --> 00:05:46,210
And I have no plans
tonight, guys.
150
00:05:46,310 --> 00:05:47,880
Nothing.
151
00:05:47,980 --> 00:05:49,980
David.
152
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,650
Well, I know, but we
already have four.
153
00:05:52,750 --> 00:05:56,150
Uh, it's me, Courtney,
Malcolm and Julian.
154
00:05:56,250 --> 00:05:58,190
What's up? Here
you go, boss man.
155
00:05:59,190 --> 00:06:00,390
That Julian?
156
00:06:00,490 --> 00:06:01,490
Yeah.
157
00:06:01,590 --> 00:06:02,930
The coffee guy?
158
00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,660
He knows a million random facts.
159
00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:05,660
Yeah. Julian?
160
00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:06,760
Yo.
161
00:06:06,860 --> 00:06:07,930
Smallest Great Lake.
162
00:06:08,030 --> 00:06:09,670
By volume, Erie.
163
00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,500
By area, Ontario.
164
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,340
Give me some, all right.
165
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:17,140
And yet he wrote.
166
00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:19,510
"Clavion" on my latte.
167
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:24,110
Oh, hey, do me a favor.
168
00:06:24,210 --> 00:06:26,550
Keep an eye out for
boxes at your house. Why?
169
00:06:26,650 --> 00:06:28,256
Well, people are constantly
stealing packages
170
00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:29,720
at my building, so I sent all
171
00:06:29,820 --> 00:06:31,890
the baby shower
gifts to your house.
172
00:06:31,990 --> 00:06:34,220
Oh, okay.
173
00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,760
(laughs, stammers)
When are they arriving?
174
00:06:36,860 --> 00:06:38,960
Well, the online registry stuff
175
00:06:39,060 --> 00:06:40,430
should start
getting there today.
176
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:43,030
Today? Today, today.
177
00:06:43,130 --> 00:06:45,330
As-as in today.
178
00:06:45,430 --> 00:06:47,570
Oh, so convenient.
179
00:06:47,670 --> 00:06:49,040
Yeah.
180
00:06:49,140 --> 00:06:50,570
(phone ringing)
181
00:06:50,670 --> 00:06:52,110
(groans) Okay.
182
00:06:52,210 --> 00:06:53,540
(clears throat)
183
00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:55,110
(chuckles) Shello?
184
00:06:55,210 --> 00:06:57,150
Malcolm, this is
no time for shello.
185
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,950
Courtney sent the baby
shower gifts to our house.
186
00:07:00,050 --> 00:07:01,396
When Mom sees it, she's
gonna be more upset
187
00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,750
than when En Vogue broke up.
188
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:05,950
Remember she came and
got us out of school?
189
00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,760
Oh, yeah, that was bad.
190
00:07:07,860 --> 00:07:09,730
You know what?
Hey, do not panic.
191
00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,190
Okay? Let me go check, baby bro.
192
00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:12,290
Okay.
193
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:14,760
(grunts) Okay.
194
00:07:14,860 --> 00:07:16,730
Oh, whoa!
195
00:07:17,730 --> 00:07:18,900
I'm gonna get these inside.
196
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,370
Okay. Hurry, hurry.
197
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,340
Oh, my God!
198
00:07:24,740 --> 00:07:26,580
Malcolm? Malcolm, what is it?
199
00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:28,480
Hello, Malcolm.
200
00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:41,120
So I'm supposed to
believe she just forgot
201
00:07:41,220 --> 00:07:44,530
to invite me to a secret
Canadian baby shower?
202
00:07:47,230 --> 00:07:48,860
Yes, ma'am.
203
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,730
Okay. Okay.
204
00:07:51,830 --> 00:07:53,800
And, uh... (clears
throat) Marty,
205
00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:55,770
he didn't want you to
know because he thought
206
00:07:55,870 --> 00:07:58,410
that you might be... mad.
207
00:07:58,510 --> 00:07:59,510
Oh, I'm not mad.
208
00:07:59,610 --> 00:08:01,480
You're not? (Laughs)
209
00:08:01,580 --> 00:08:03,110
Mama, that is good.
210
00:08:03,210 --> 00:08:04,480
I'm more numb.
211
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,820
Numb with sadness.
212
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:12,590
I am so sorry, Mama.
213
00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:14,920
Is there, uh, is there
anything I can do to help?
214
00:08:15,020 --> 00:08:16,730
You can meet a girl,
get her pregnant,
215
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,130
and invite me to
the baby shower.
216
00:08:22,700 --> 00:08:24,930
I was thinking more
like frozen yogurt.
217
00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:31,540
Hey, Calvin.
218
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:33,680
Look at my dad out
here busting his hump.
219
00:08:33,780 --> 00:08:35,540
Yes, he is.
220
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,280
I hate to admit it,
but you were right.
221
00:08:37,380 --> 00:08:39,310
Yeah. Hey, you know,
I was thinking.
222
00:08:39,410 --> 00:08:41,220
Maybe we should
take you and Tina
223
00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:42,720
out to drinks at
Ernie's tonight.
224
00:08:42,820 --> 00:08:45,220
You know, celebrate how
well this is all going.
225
00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:47,120
Is this just so you can
say, "I told you so"?
226
00:08:47,220 --> 00:08:48,490
Yeah, well, pretty much.
227
00:08:48,590 --> 00:08:49,790
Well, if you're buying,
228
00:08:49,890 --> 00:08:51,490
you can say whatever you want.
229
00:08:51,590 --> 00:08:53,630
And if your dad keeps
working like this,
230
00:08:53,730 --> 00:08:55,630
he's gonna be
employee of the month.
231
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:58,800
What, uh, does employee
of the month get?
232
00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:01,670
They get to work another month.
233
00:09:01,770 --> 00:09:03,610
Good enough.
234
00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:09,040
She wasn't mad?
235
00:09:09,110 --> 00:09:10,280
No, I wish.
236
00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:11,380
She was sad.
237
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:12,980
Oh, no, that's bad.
238
00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:16,380
Okay, okay, here's
what I'm thinking.
239
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,400
This is one of those
problems that just goes away
240
00:09:18,450 --> 00:09:20,490
if you avoid it.
241
00:09:21,590 --> 00:09:23,790
Like the "check engine" light.
242
00:09:23,890 --> 00:09:26,630
Okay, I feel like you're
mocking me with that answer.
243
00:09:26,730 --> 00:09:28,530
Yes. But yes.
244
00:09:28,630 --> 00:09:30,730
Marty, what if Courtney
finds out you lied?
245
00:09:30,830 --> 00:09:32,476
You told her Mama wouldn't
care about the shower.
246
00:09:32,500 --> 00:09:34,440
Mom and Courtney
barely see each other.
247
00:09:34,540 --> 00:09:35,846
How's she gonna find
out? (door creaks open)
248
00:09:35,870 --> 00:09:37,540
Well, off the top of my head,
249
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,680
I can think of one way.
250
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,050
Wait a minute, does
that sign say...?
251
00:09:45,150 --> 00:09:46,410
Is it trivia night?
252
00:09:46,510 --> 00:09:47,750
Oh, God.
253
00:09:47,850 --> 00:09:49,280
Guys, we should play.
254
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:51,720
This is starting to feel
like another Dave setup.
255
00:09:51,820 --> 00:09:53,160
I'm getting good at them, right?
256
00:09:56,060 --> 00:09:58,530
(chuckles) Hey...
257
00:09:58,630 --> 00:10:01,200
Mommy. (Laughs)
258
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:03,870
I am so glad to see you,
259
00:10:03,970 --> 00:10:06,170
because when I told you
260
00:10:06,270 --> 00:10:08,340
that Courtney wasn't
having a baby shower,
261
00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:10,570
I just assumed you
meant in this country.
262
00:10:10,670 --> 00:10:12,410
Canadian showers are
completely different.
263
00:10:12,510 --> 00:10:13,956
It's like how they have
their own Thanksgiving,
264
00:10:13,980 --> 00:10:16,110
but it's on a different
day, so nobody cares.
265
00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:18,380
It's fine, Marty.
266
00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:19,680
It is?
267
00:10:19,780 --> 00:10:20,780
Yes.
268
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:23,020
I got a lot of clarity today.
269
00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:26,250
I know that I will never be a
part of my grandchild's life.
270
00:10:26,350 --> 00:10:29,930
And I now know that
your word means nothing.
271
00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:32,030
No, w... that is not fine.
272
00:10:32,130 --> 00:10:33,630
Mommy... Hey, Marty.
273
00:10:33,730 --> 00:10:36,430
Hi, Mrs. B. Oh, you don't
have to call me Mrs. B.
274
00:10:36,530 --> 00:10:38,500
Just call me "random lady,"
275
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:41,140
because that's all I'll
ever be to my grandchild.
276
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,510
(air horn blows)
277
00:10:44,610 --> 00:10:47,180
All right, you drunken
brainiacs, it's trivia time!
278
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,340
(cheering, applause)
279
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:51,650
Marty, why is your
mom mad at me?
280
00:10:51,750 --> 00:10:55,580
Well, that's a...
it's a quagmire
281
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:57,850
in sort of an enigma,
282
00:10:57,950 --> 00:11:00,320
inside of a conundrum.
283
00:11:00,420 --> 00:11:02,460
It's a toughie. (Laughs)
284
00:11:05,230 --> 00:11:07,260
And final question of the round.
285
00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:09,900
One point for every
correct answer.
286
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,670
Name the noble gases.
287
00:11:11,770 --> 00:11:14,000
Oh, noble gases?
We got this. Yeah.
288
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:16,300
I can't believe you,
Marty. Courtney, please.
289
00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,086
Hey, hey, hey, guys,
guys, can we please focus?
290
00:11:18,110 --> 00:11:19,240
We need some answers.
291
00:11:19,340 --> 00:11:20,510
I need some answers.
292
00:11:20,610 --> 00:11:22,216
Why did you tell me
your mom would be fine
293
00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:23,580
not going to the shower?
294
00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:25,326
Because I was trying
to make everyone happy.
295
00:11:25,350 --> 00:11:27,420
Oh, then, well done. Look
how happy everyone is.
296
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,280
Ah.
297
00:11:29,380 --> 00:11:30,450
DAVE: Argon,
298
00:11:30,550 --> 00:11:31,950
radon, krypton, oganesson.
299
00:11:32,050 --> 00:11:33,160
Got them all.
300
00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:35,320
GEMMA: Dave, would you chill?
301
00:11:35,420 --> 00:11:37,730
Can't you see how
emotional Tina is?
302
00:11:37,830 --> 00:11:40,560
Yes, uh, but you know what would
make her feel better? Winning.
303
00:11:40,660 --> 00:11:42,730
Calvin, uh, number four.
304
00:11:42,830 --> 00:11:44,800
Are you sure that these are all
305
00:11:44,900 --> 00:11:47,200
the Pam Grier
movies of the 1970s?
306
00:11:47,300 --> 00:11:50,210
Dave, I told you, I
know my Pam Grier.
307
00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:52,710
It was me, Pam and my VCR.
308
00:11:52,810 --> 00:11:54,480
We had a thang.
309
00:11:54,580 --> 00:11:55,980
(both laugh)
310
00:11:57,510 --> 00:11:58,680
It was a friendship.
311
00:11:58,780 --> 00:12:00,420
(bell dings)
312
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:03,320
And that's time. Pencils down.
313
00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:05,350
Look at this.
314
00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:07,590
It's a damn travesty.
315
00:12:09,120 --> 00:12:11,290
Marty, we got five
blank questions, man.
316
00:12:11,390 --> 00:12:12,830
Courtney was distracting me.
317
00:12:12,930 --> 00:12:14,776
You could have just made
up some answers, Marty.
318
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,100
Apparently, lies
are your specialty.
319
00:12:18,670 --> 00:12:20,240
And I had to go to
a real dark place
320
00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:22,740
to name all these
serial killers.
321
00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:24,510
And for what?
322
00:12:31,110 --> 00:12:33,220
Marty, we need to do
something about this.
323
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,220
Okay, don't worry.
324
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:37,120
I have a solution.
325
00:12:37,220 --> 00:12:40,120
We just give her the baby.
326
00:12:45,460 --> 00:12:48,900
I'm not giving your mom my baby.
327
00:12:50,670 --> 00:12:53,170
Okay, yeah, when you say
it like that, of course...
328
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:58,340
This, uh, might be the
skinny piña colada talking,
329
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,810
but, uh, you guys blow.
330
00:13:03,180 --> 00:13:04,850
Come on, Dave, our
rideshare is here.
331
00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:06,950
We got to get home to
Grover. Ooh, Grover.
332
00:13:07,050 --> 00:13:10,320
Furry blue Muppet, debuted
on Sesame Street in 1970.
333
00:13:10,420 --> 00:13:12,350
Booyah.
334
00:13:12,450 --> 00:13:14,390
(grunts)
335
00:13:14,490 --> 00:13:16,066
I bet you didn't expect
to have trivia winners
336
00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:18,090
in your car tonight, huh?
337
00:13:18,190 --> 00:13:23,400
And, yes, I did
have a piña colada.
338
00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:25,670
Ask me if I paid for
it. You can ask me.
339
00:13:25,770 --> 00:13:27,530
Okay, Dave, Dave. Calm
down. Ask me. Uh, sir?
340
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:32,470
Sir, sir, I requested a chatty
driver, and I'd like to chat.
341
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,080
Nice night, huh?
342
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,880
Dad? Lamar?
343
00:13:38,980 --> 00:13:40,750
Where did you get this car?
344
00:13:40,850 --> 00:13:42,250
It's a loaner.
345
00:13:43,350 --> 00:13:44,750
Is this one of the Fusebox cars?
346
00:13:44,850 --> 00:13:46,720
Well, now you're just
jumping to conclusions.
347
00:13:46,820 --> 00:13:48,590
Am I?
348
00:13:48,690 --> 00:13:50,630
These are Fusebox floor
mats. (Gemma gasps)
349
00:13:52,190 --> 00:13:54,830
I didn't want to
get the car dirty.
350
00:13:54,930 --> 00:13:58,200
A good way to not get it dirty
would be not to steal it.
351
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,300
Steal it?
352
00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:02,600
The kids call it
a "side hustle."
353
00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:05,340
The owner literally
handed me the keys
354
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:07,340
and told me to take
good care of it.
355
00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:10,750
I don't think he meant to
pick up passengers in it.
356
00:14:12,180 --> 00:14:14,550
You didn't hear
the way he said it.
357
00:14:14,650 --> 00:14:16,890
(groans) (car powers off)
358
00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,090
What happened?
359
00:14:19,190 --> 00:14:21,490
I don't know. The
car just stopped.
360
00:14:21,590 --> 00:14:22,930
Why?
361
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:24,660
Don't ask me. It's not my car.
362
00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:26,390
Well...
363
00:14:26,490 --> 00:14:28,330
When was the last
time you charged it?
364
00:14:28,430 --> 00:14:29,676
You know, I've been
meaning to look up
365
00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:30,706
how often you got to do that.
366
00:14:30,730 --> 00:14:32,900
♪ ♪
367
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,300
Hey, morning, Calvin.
368
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,360
Just, uh, dropping off
your new favorite employee.
369
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:37,510
Yeah. Hey, Lamar,
370
00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:39,340
the silver Hyundai we
worked on yesterday,
371
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:40,780
it's only half charged.
372
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,410
Hmm, uh, charger must be broken.
373
00:14:42,510 --> 00:14:44,086
Yeah, I bet that's
what it is. (Chuckles)
374
00:14:44,110 --> 00:14:46,210
I'm sure that's what it
is. Has to be what it is.
375
00:14:46,310 --> 00:14:48,096
Happens to phone chargers,
happens to car chargers.
376
00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:49,220
Case closed.
377
00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:52,020
Well-well, didn't
we run diagnostics
378
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,360
on all of the chargers?
Well, in that case,
379
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:56,036
could be something else,
could be anything else.
380
00:14:56,060 --> 00:14:57,960
Could be a million things. Yeah.
381
00:14:58,060 --> 00:15:00,060
It is a mystery that,
frankly, may never be solved.
382
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:03,130
In fact, we might
as well stop trying.
383
00:15:03,230 --> 00:15:05,070
Yeah, you should
definitely stop.
384
00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:08,170
Lamar, would you please plug the
Hyundai up to another charger?
385
00:15:08,270 --> 00:15:09,640
You got it, boss. Thank you.
386
00:15:09,740 --> 00:15:11,140
Thanks for covering for me.
387
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:12,670
You're a good son.
388
00:15:12,770 --> 00:15:16,310
Yeah, maybe, but I'm
a terrible friend.
389
00:15:16,410 --> 00:15:19,010
You know, that's the first
time I've ever lied to Calvin.
390
00:15:19,110 --> 00:15:21,620
I mean, except for the time
that I told him his gazpacho
391
00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:23,050
wasn't too salty.
392
00:15:23,150 --> 00:15:24,490
It was inedible.
393
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,490
It was like eating
a bowl of ocean.
394
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,690
♪ ♪
395
00:15:29,790 --> 00:15:31,830
(children babbling over TV)
396
00:15:34,900 --> 00:15:36,130
Hey, Mom?
397
00:15:37,330 --> 00:15:38,400
Can we talk?
398
00:15:38,500 --> 00:15:40,570
Sure.
399
00:15:40,670 --> 00:15:44,210
Just watching home movies,
when things were simple.
400
00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,840
Just me and Mama's
little babies.
401
00:15:46,940 --> 00:15:48,540
Aww.
402
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,550
Is that Marty in
the school play?
403
00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:54,320
Yeah. He was terrible.
He just stood there.
404
00:15:56,050 --> 00:15:57,720
I was playing a tree.
405
00:15:59,950 --> 00:16:02,690
Okay. Mom? Uh...
406
00:16:02,790 --> 00:16:04,690
I need you to know
how sorry I am.
407
00:16:04,790 --> 00:16:07,030
Okay? This whole thing
was all my fault.
408
00:16:07,130 --> 00:16:08,930
No, it's not, Marty.
409
00:16:09,030 --> 00:16:12,970
It all started because I made
an awful, stupid mistake,
410
00:16:13,070 --> 00:16:14,770
forgetting to invite you.
411
00:16:14,870 --> 00:16:16,270
It hurt your feelings,
412
00:16:16,370 --> 00:16:18,540
and I am so sorry.
413
00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:22,540
I guess I could have been a
little more understanding.
414
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,850
I know what baby brain is like.
415
00:16:24,950 --> 00:16:26,680
(chuckles) One
time, I got confused
416
00:16:26,780 --> 00:16:29,380
and put breast milk
in Calvin's coffee.
417
00:16:32,050 --> 00:16:34,220
Ew. He loved it.
418
00:16:35,190 --> 00:16:36,860
Ew. Ew.
419
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:39,860
But that's it exactly.
420
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:41,460
(sighs) I'm so scattered.
421
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,300
I'm screwing up left and right.
422
00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:48,340
But I don't just want you to
be a part of this baby's life.
423
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,700
I need you.
424
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:52,310
You do?
425
00:16:52,410 --> 00:16:54,980
I do. My mom is
2,000 miles away.
426
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:56,556
MARTY: Yeah, and we're both
gonna be working full-time,
427
00:16:56,580 --> 00:17:00,080
so we gonna need somebody
to dump this baby on.
428
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:02,580
You'd dump that baby on me?
429
00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:06,650
(laughs): Ooh...
430
00:17:06,750 --> 00:17:07,820
Tina?
431
00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:09,590
Not now, Gemma!
432
00:17:11,930 --> 00:17:13,430
Uh, but it's an emergency.
433
00:17:13,530 --> 00:17:15,330
I've got clumpy
gravy on the stove
434
00:17:15,430 --> 00:17:16,800
and I don't know what to do.
435
00:17:18,430 --> 00:17:22,440
Gemma, I thought we agreed you
would never attempt gravy again.
436
00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:24,510
You don't have what it takes.
437
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:27,940
Okay, before you say
anything else hurtful.
438
00:17:29,010 --> 00:17:30,510
ALL: Surprise!
439
00:17:30,610 --> 00:17:32,080
What is happening?
440
00:17:32,180 --> 00:17:34,420
It's a baby shower.
Well, actually,
441
00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:36,950
it's a grandma shower
for our baby's Glammy T.
442
00:17:37,950 --> 00:17:39,450
That's me.
443
00:17:39,550 --> 00:17:40,760
(laughs)
444
00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,160
Here you go. Oh, my God... oh...
445
00:17:43,260 --> 00:17:46,930
Look, I know I said I forgave
you earlier, but I was lying.
446
00:17:47,030 --> 00:17:48,930
Now I forgive you.
447
00:17:50,130 --> 00:17:51,370
Ooh!
448
00:17:52,770 --> 00:17:54,140
Ooh, let me steal one of these.
449
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:55,470
(chuckles)
450
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,410
He knows. Who?
451
00:18:03,510 --> 00:18:05,580
Calvin. He's on to us.
452
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,850
I walked past him with a
tray of pigs in a blanket,
453
00:18:07,950 --> 00:18:10,890
and he said, "Let me
steal one of those."
454
00:18:13,090 --> 00:18:14,890
Seems pretty innocent.
455
00:18:14,990 --> 00:18:16,920
Excuse me. Oh, man.
456
00:18:17,020 --> 00:18:19,530
These things are so good,
man, they should be a crime.
457
00:18:19,630 --> 00:18:21,730
(soft laughter)
458
00:18:21,830 --> 00:18:23,500
They're not that good.
459
00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:25,170
What are you talking about?
460
00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:26,500
Stop toying with me.
461
00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:32,310
God, you're like a cat, and
I'm like your little mouse.
462
00:18:32,410 --> 00:18:34,910
Son, it's okay. He's
racked with guilt.
463
00:18:35,010 --> 00:18:37,410
Calvin, you know that
car that wasn't charged?
464
00:18:37,510 --> 00:18:41,350
It's because I drove it for a
ride sharing service last night.
465
00:18:41,450 --> 00:18:44,750
Whoa, whoa. You took a
customer's car from the Fusebox?
466
00:18:44,850 --> 00:18:46,810
You got to understand, I'm
desperate to make money
467
00:18:46,850 --> 00:18:48,390
so I can come around more.
468
00:18:48,490 --> 00:18:51,190
I-I just got my family back
and I don't want to lose them.
469
00:18:51,290 --> 00:18:53,530
But I told Dave to
lie to you about it,
470
00:18:53,630 --> 00:18:55,360
and for that, I'm sorry.
471
00:18:55,460 --> 00:18:59,030
Oh, but you're not sorry
about the grand theft auto?
472
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:02,740
That, too?
473
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:07,580
Look, I'm sorry, Calvin.
474
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:11,380
You know, Dave, I've never
known you to be a liar.
475
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:13,650
I mean, you've been a
lot of other things.
476
00:19:13,750 --> 00:19:15,950
A nuisance, a pest,
477
00:19:16,050 --> 00:19:20,360
a pain in the ass, an over
talker, a bad dresser.
478
00:19:25,060 --> 00:19:27,030
But I know if you lied, then,
479
00:19:27,130 --> 00:19:29,860
it must have been for
an important reason.
480
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:31,870
It was.
481
00:19:31,970 --> 00:19:33,900
All right, I guess
this one time,
482
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,600
I'm just gonna look past it.
483
00:19:35,700 --> 00:19:37,440
So I can keep my job?
484
00:19:37,540 --> 00:19:39,010
Oh, no. You're fired.
485
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,210
I'm just not gonna
call the police.
486
00:19:42,310 --> 00:19:44,380
Okay. Well, thank you.
487
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:47,380
But I tell you what,
I know for a fact
488
00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:50,250
that Motor Boys on
Marengo, they're hiring.
489
00:19:50,350 --> 00:19:53,320
And I would be more
than happy to write you
490
00:19:53,420 --> 00:19:55,520
a glowing recommendation.
491
00:19:55,620 --> 00:19:57,290
You'd do that for me?
492
00:19:57,390 --> 00:19:59,260
No.
493
00:19:59,360 --> 00:20:00,960
He's doing it for me.
494
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,330
No.
495
00:20:03,430 --> 00:20:05,100
I'm doing it because
I hate Motor Boys.
496
00:20:06,930 --> 00:20:10,240
Feel free to steal
everything under the roof.
497
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:12,670
I will.
498
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:16,440
Let's see. (Gasps)
499
00:20:16,540 --> 00:20:17,780
Oh, so sweet.
500
00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:19,180
Now I don't have to say it.
501
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:21,150
Yeah. Aww.
502
00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:23,390
So cute. Mm-hmm.
503
00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:24,620
Glammy T?
504
00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:27,690
Open this one next. Ooh.
505
00:20:27,790 --> 00:20:30,630
(gasps) Oh, my goodness.
506
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,330
Ah! How cute.
507
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:35,530
(gasps)
508
00:20:35,630 --> 00:20:39,270
Matching sneakers!
509
00:20:39,370 --> 00:20:41,400
(wailing)
510
00:20:43,470 --> 00:20:45,510
(crying)
511
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:51,610
You know, I've seen Mama
ugly-cry before, but Marty?
512
00:20:51,710 --> 00:20:54,150
Well, he is his mama's boy.
513
00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:04,830
Captioning sponsored by CBS
514
00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:07,830
and TOYOTA.
515
00:21:07,930 --> 00:21:10,050
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
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