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1
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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
1
00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:03,936
Hey, Slime. Guess what?
2
00:00:04,071 --> 00:00:05,270
I say "Slime" now.
3
00:00:05,406 --> 00:00:07,772
Also, I got two tickets
to see Shania next month.
4
00:00:07,808 --> 00:00:10,554
Aw, that's sweet, man!
I mean, I gotta book it off,
5
00:00:10,589 --> 00:00:12,178
- but that shouldn't be a problem.
- I'm gonna ask her to go with me.
6
00:00:12,195 --> 00:00:14,713
That makes sense. I was... busy, anyway.
7
00:00:14,738 --> 00:00:17,149
You think it's too
soon after the breakup?
8
00:00:17,218 --> 00:00:18,250
You think it's uncouth?
9
00:00:18,285 --> 00:00:19,985
No, it's totally couth.
10
00:00:20,054 --> 00:00:21,386
Hey, you guys got better chemistry
11
00:00:21,455 --> 00:00:23,054
than Ryan Stiles and Colin Mochrie.
12
00:00:23,090 --> 00:00:24,790
Whoa, that's like the highest compliment
13
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you can pay a partnership.
14
00:00:26,060 --> 00:00:27,358
I know!
15
00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:28,694
Go get her, tiger.
16
00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:30,228
Gwen!
17
00:00:31,932 --> 00:00:34,133
Want some? It's a new recipe.
18
00:00:36,336 --> 00:00:38,403
What do you think? Good? Terrible?
19
00:00:38,439 --> 00:00:40,605
- This is incredible.
- Thank you.
20
00:00:40,641 --> 00:00:43,542
There's, um, something
I wanna talk to you about.
21
00:00:43,677 --> 00:00:45,878
There's something I wanna
talk to you about, too.
22
00:00:46,013 --> 00:00:47,345
- You go first.
- No, you go first.
23
00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:48,514
- No, you go first.
- No, you go first.
24
00:00:48,556 --> 00:00:52,217
Fine, I'll go first.
25
00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:53,418
Oh, no...
26
00:00:53,421 --> 00:00:55,053
Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God!
27
00:00:55,089 --> 00:00:55,855
I mean, it's distinctly the best...
28
00:00:55,883 --> 00:00:58,157
- Not surprising, though.
- What's your 911? Is someone hurt?
29
00:00:58,233 --> 00:00:59,958
- 911...?
- Oh, sorry!
30
00:00:59,960 --> 00:01:00,969
I always get them confused.
31
00:01:01,032 --> 00:01:02,427
What's the number for information?
32
00:01:02,430 --> 00:01:03,962
- What?!
- 411.
33
00:01:03,964 --> 00:01:07,398
Oh! So, yeah,
we've got some hot new 411 for you!
34
00:01:07,435 --> 00:01:10,435
OMT was named the
number one sporting goods store
35
00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,104
- by the Korverton Crier!
- What?
36
00:01:12,153 --> 00:01:14,572
They say we're the best
because our employees
37
00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:16,441
are "genuine athletes"...
talking about me...
38
00:01:16,477 --> 00:01:18,209
"who know their stuff."
39
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,912
This is fantastic news!
40
00:01:19,914 --> 00:01:22,981
This is false news!
41
00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:27,218
Carlito...
42
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- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.MY-SUBS.com
43
00:01:32,359 --> 00:01:34,325
Whose palms did you grease to gain
44
00:01:34,361 --> 00:01:37,195
this dubious distinction,
señor cucaracha?
45
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No one's. We earned it on merit.
46
00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:45,137
Sports Dynasty has just as
many genuine athletes on staff.
47
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:46,705
- Pfft!
- Even more.
48
00:01:46,707 --> 00:01:48,007
- Pfft!
- It's not a competition.
49
00:01:48,057 --> 00:01:51,876
To prove it, I challenge you
to a sporting competition!
50
00:01:51,912 --> 00:01:54,880
I will beat you
at your own game, cabrón...
51
00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:56,615
El hockey!
52
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Hockey?
53
00:01:58,352 --> 00:02:00,352
Oh... no.
54
00:02:00,421 --> 00:02:02,487
- Why not?
- Such short notice.
55
00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:04,223
We'll never be able to book ice time.
56
00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:05,891
I already booked it.
57
00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:07,693
Tomorrow, 6 pm.
58
00:02:07,695 --> 00:02:09,093
So be there.
59
00:02:09,130 --> 00:02:11,429
Unless you're a scared little ninfa!
60
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:12,830
That's a baby cucaracha.
61
00:02:12,867 --> 00:02:15,000
- You're on!
- Well, wait a minute.
62
00:02:15,002 --> 00:02:16,334
DJ played pro hockey!
63
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:17,869
He's gonna mop the floor with you!
64
00:02:17,872 --> 00:02:19,572
I mean, technically,
he failed to make the NHL,
65
00:02:19,579 --> 00:02:22,374
- but yes, he will beat you.
- Thanks for the clarification, Wayne,
66
00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:24,576
but, uh,
let's not dignify this with a response.
67
00:02:24,612 --> 00:02:27,913
Sorry, DJ, I know what a pain
in the hassle it is to book ice,
68
00:02:27,982 --> 00:02:29,348
so we have to do this.
69
00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:32,351
Prepare to meet your maker.
70
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:33,618
Cool, cool.
71
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:35,854
But... but, like, no contact, right?
72
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,256
Extra! Contact!
73
00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:40,659
Beautiful hair... Mmm...
74
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,327
What's her name?
75
00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:44,529
Uh... I-I call her Skunk Girl.
76
00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:46,198
This stick is an avatar for her.
77
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:47,332
No further questions.
78
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:48,734
I went to Korverton's Funland yesterday,
79
00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:50,702
and she sat behind me
on the tailbone crusher.
80
00:02:50,738 --> 00:02:52,471
Just get to the part of the story
81
00:02:52,606 --> 00:02:54,440
- where she presses charges or whatever.
- This is her.
82
00:02:54,535 --> 00:02:57,942
Look at that beautiful shock
of white in those ebony locks.
83
00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:04,082
I paid $24.99 to keep her
in my wallet forever.
84
00:03:04,217 --> 00:03:05,484
$24.99 you paid?
85
00:03:05,486 --> 00:03:08,553
Plus tax. I need to find her!
86
00:03:08,555 --> 00:03:09,887
I've been on every platform.
87
00:03:09,924 --> 00:03:15,160
I've searched #sexyskunk,
#skunkbaby, #femalepepelepew...
88
00:03:15,295 --> 00:03:17,329
Have you tried #braindoctorsnearme?
89
00:03:17,331 --> 00:03:19,431
She's too young to be
a brain doctor, Wayne.
90
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:21,366
Yet another insult parried
by your dimwittedness.
91
00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:25,103
I almost envy it.
92
00:03:25,172 --> 00:03:26,838
Brain... doctors...
93
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:28,072
near... me.
94
00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:33,845
Oh, I'm afraid
this area is employees only.
95
00:03:33,914 --> 00:03:37,516
The hatchling opens
her eyes to her new world.
96
00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:41,386
Out of the egg,
into the world she flies.
97
00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:46,057
How'd you find me, Snowy Owl?
98
00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:48,193
Relax, Blue Bird.
99
00:03:48,328 --> 00:03:50,862
I'm not here to dredge up the past.
100
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:52,331
Call me Camille.
101
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:55,800
I, too, am now a boring,
law-abiding citizen.
102
00:03:55,869 --> 00:03:58,202
I am not boring!
103
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,339
Oh, excuse me.
104
00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,742
Oh, church potluck? Yes!
105
00:04:03,811 --> 00:04:05,877
I'm here because I own
a dispensary called
106
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:07,646
I Like Big Buds.
107
00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:10,949
And I cannot lie, we're franchising!
108
00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:14,186
I want you to manage our new store.
109
00:04:14,188 --> 00:04:17,089
A dispensary...?
110
00:04:17,091 --> 00:04:18,557
Of marijuana?
111
00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:21,760
There's lots of room for growth
and it's all above board.
112
00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:24,296
No more jumping from planes
in the Sonoran desert
113
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:28,367
with half a kilo of diesel
haze shoved up your tush.
114
00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:31,436
I could never leave OMT.
115
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:34,839
And it was 1.3 kilos.
116
00:04:34,908 --> 00:04:37,843
You're the best damn
product-mover I've ever seen.
117
00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:40,312
This place doesn't value
what you have to offer.
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00:04:40,381 --> 00:04:43,248
I... I wouldn't say that.
119
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- _
- Argh!
120
00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:45,984
Wayne!
121
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,955
I can give you your own
office with a window.
122
00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:51,289
I have a window.
123
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:55,594
Oh, for the love of Keeran...
124
00:04:55,596 --> 00:04:57,596
To outside.
125
00:04:57,731 --> 00:05:00,064
Also, 10k more
than what you're making here.
126
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:01,165
Oh?
127
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,138
Let me know when you're
ready to work somewhere
128
00:05:06,173 --> 00:05:08,139
that really appreciates you.
129
00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:22,487
What are you doing?!
130
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:24,389
- What are you...
- Doing? DJ?
131
00:05:25,222 --> 00:05:26,357
Hey, Cynth.
132
00:05:27,628 --> 00:05:29,961
Are... you okay?
133
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:32,564
Never better.
134
00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:35,600
Uh... hey, I was thinking,
we should cancel the game.
135
00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:36,968
There's so much to do here.
136
00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:39,904
Deep clean the rugs, payroll,
shareholder reports.
137
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:41,773
Nah, I've taken care of everything.
138
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,508
Well, except the shareholder reports;
139
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,842
we're not a public company.
140
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,478
Don't you think it's time?
141
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,881
Are you...
afraid to play against Carlito?
142
00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:52,250
Of course not. I live for this!
143
00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:53,518
Great!
144
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,788
'Cause I ordered custom
jerseys for the game.
145
00:05:57,378 --> 00:05:59,791
Okay!
146
00:05:59,926 --> 00:06:02,527
A simple "thank you" would suffice.
147
00:06:05,132 --> 00:06:06,931
Ah! Saw your text.
148
00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,700
Got here fast as I could. What's up?
149
00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:10,469
I want you to smash in my knee.
150
00:06:10,471 --> 00:06:11,769
Alright, right or left?
151
00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:14,105
- Aren't you gonna ask why?
- Uh, sure. Why?
152
00:06:14,108 --> 00:06:16,341
Carlito challenged OMT to a hockey game.
153
00:06:16,476 --> 00:06:17,776
Oh, man.
154
00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:20,345
You haven't stepped foot on
the ice since... the incident.
155
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:21,746
- What's it been, like, five years?
- Six.
156
00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:23,982
My phone just reminded me.
Stirring montage.
157
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:25,151
I've been trying to back out of the game
158
00:06:25,202 --> 00:06:27,752
but the gang's all fired up.
159
00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:29,487
Don't worry, bro. I got ya.
160
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,489
- Which one? Right?
- Right, right.
161
00:06:31,525 --> 00:06:33,558
- Alright.
- Right, let's do it.
162
00:06:36,905 --> 00:06:38,262
Hey, Gwen!
163
00:06:38,708 --> 00:06:41,032
Hey, Deej. Heard about the big game.
164
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,967
Can't wait to watch
you kick Carlito's ass.
165
00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:44,536
Ha, yeah, that's what I'm gonna do!
166
00:06:44,671 --> 00:06:46,304
And, uh, I still wanna talk later,
167
00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:47,738
but maybe... after the game?
168
00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:49,674
Yeah, sure. Sounds good.
169
00:06:49,676 --> 00:06:51,609
We're pretty slammed, Josh.
170
00:06:51,611 --> 00:06:53,578
- Wanna come work?
- Yes.
171
00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,646
Right behind ya.
172
00:06:55,682 --> 00:06:57,649
So, should we grab another club?
173
00:06:57,651 --> 00:06:59,651
Changed my mind.
174
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:01,319
Can't run away from my demons forever.
175
00:07:01,388 --> 00:07:02,393
I'm gonna play.
176
00:07:02,423 --> 00:07:03,922
Sure you're ready?
177
00:07:03,991 --> 00:07:06,925
- I think I am.
- I know you am.
178
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,793
You were actually
gonna smash in my knee, huh?
179
00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:10,862
Smash you anytime, anywhere, bro.
180
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:12,564
You really are my best friend.
181
00:07:12,699 --> 00:07:14,666
- Till the day we die.
- Together.
182
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,368
- In a murder-suicide.
- When it feels right.
183
00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,236
Mm-hm!
184
00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:19,737
Thanks, bro.
185
00:07:28,749 --> 00:07:29,848
Knock, knock!
186
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:31,950
Oh? Oh, Virginia!
187
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:35,787
I got everyone a little surprise!
188
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,690
Hey, Keeran, nice jockstrap!
189
00:07:38,825 --> 00:07:40,825
Thanks. Uh, it's a medium.
190
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:42,360
Manage those expectations. Smart.
191
00:07:42,496 --> 00:07:44,796
Go read your Bible, Virginia!
192
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,898
Hey, I didn't ask for that.
193
00:07:46,934 --> 00:07:48,800
Oh, yeah,
they called to confirm the order,
194
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,468
so I thought I'd give myself the C.
195
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:52,970
- Oh.
- And you got the A.
196
00:07:53,006 --> 00:07:54,239
- Oh!
- Yeah!
197
00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:57,642
And an A for you, Chris,
Jen, Keeran, Wayne.
198
00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:58,844
You all got A's.
199
00:07:58,979 --> 00:08:00,545
So what does the A stand for?
200
00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:01,879
Assistant captain.
201
00:08:01,915 --> 00:08:03,482
Uh, actually,
it stands for alternate captain.
202
00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:06,518
It actually stands for appreciation,
203
00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:08,320
'cause I appreciate you all equally.
204
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:09,854
We appreciate you, Deej!
205
00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:11,055
Respect.
206
00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,157
Thanks for the jerseys, boss.
207
00:08:12,292 --> 00:08:14,158
Yeah, thanks, DJ. You're the best ever.
208
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,860
We'd be completely
jerseyless without you.
209
00:08:15,863 --> 00:08:16,961
Better than anyone else.
210
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,997
Who wants to help me with my jersey?
211
00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:21,466
Yeah, it's just stuck at
the back here a little bit.
212
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:22,734
_
213
00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:24,469
Stop wiggling. You're moving too much.
214
00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:25,537
That's my hair, that's my hair.
215
00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:27,305
Alright, team. It's go time.
216
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,807
Now, remember,
it's not about winning or losing,
217
00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:30,942
it's about having fun.
218
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:32,877
Yeah, and nothing is
more fun than winning!
219
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,412
- Ooh!
- That's a fact.
220
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:35,780
Drum circles are fun, too.
221
00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:38,617
That's also a fact.
You know what else is a fact?
222
00:08:38,619 --> 00:08:40,352
We're the best damn
sports store in town.
223
00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:41,653
Now let's show them why!
224
00:08:41,722 --> 00:08:42,887
- Woo!
- Bring it in.
225
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:44,422
Three... two... One More...
226
00:08:46,493 --> 00:08:48,693
Go!
227
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,630
Oh, no...
228
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:55,634
My roller coaster-riding,
skunk-haired dream girl!
229
00:08:57,838 --> 00:08:59,671
I don't wanna make myself
a fool in front of her.
230
00:08:59,767 --> 00:09:01,573
It's fine.
231
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:03,608
We'll make you look good
out there, buddy.
232
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:05,042
Well, well, well!
233
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:08,713
We meet again, Connor McDeafy.
234
00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:10,315
What's up with the Hanson brothers?
235
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:12,183
- Mmmbop?
- Slap shot.
236
00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:14,252
It's supposed to be employees only.
237
00:09:14,254 --> 00:09:15,720
They are employees.
238
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:18,122
We went on a hiring spree this morning.
239
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,458
You hired them 'cause they're
built like brick shithouses.
240
00:09:20,494 --> 00:09:22,327
No! I hired them
241
00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:25,429
'cause they demonstrated
stellar interpersonal skills.
242
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,666
And product-testing abilities!
243
00:09:28,668 --> 00:09:30,434
- You're goin' down.
- On you.
244
00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:31,669
What...?
245
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:35,273
Let's go, piss jug!
246
00:09:35,275 --> 00:09:36,874
Let's go, piss jug!
247
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:42,146
Woo! Let's go! Woo!
248
00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,448
DJ? Deej?
249
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,216
Let's go. The ref blew the whistle.
250
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,351
He did?
251
00:09:51,592 --> 00:09:54,458
What are you doing?!
252
00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:56,494
I forgot my, uh...
253
00:09:56,630 --> 00:09:57,895
water bottle.
254
00:09:57,897 --> 00:10:01,232
We have a bunch on the bench! But...
255
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:02,967
Seriously? Now?
256
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:09,608
Jen, you take the face-off.
Chris, you're right wing.
257
00:10:09,743 --> 00:10:10,842
Keeran?
258
00:10:12,646 --> 00:10:13,712
Keeran!
259
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:15,012
- Huh?
- Take left wing!
260
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:16,381
Oh, yeah. Got it!
261
00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:18,349
I'll handle the D.
262
00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:19,717
Let's go!
263
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:23,387
Ugh, damn it!
264
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:24,789
Hey.
265
00:10:24,924 --> 00:10:26,625
Shouldn't you be on the ice?
266
00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:28,059
Augh...
267
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:31,062
Oh, I, uh... tore my ACL.
268
00:10:31,098 --> 00:10:35,199
It might even be my MCL.
I just pray my LCL is intact.
269
00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:37,468
Yet you're not screaming in agony.
270
00:10:37,504 --> 00:10:39,237
Too tough for my own good?
271
00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,472
I don't think that's it.
272
00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:44,942
Gwen, my hockey career didn't
just die from natural causes.
273
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,777
I don't like to talk about it.
274
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,012
You don't have to.
275
00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:50,749
It was game 7 against the
Broggsville Brigadiers.
276
00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:53,551
The game was tied 2-2, 17 seconds left.
277
00:10:53,553 --> 00:10:55,486
I got sprung on a breakaway.
278
00:10:55,522 --> 00:10:58,289
Everything was riding on me...
279
00:10:58,291 --> 00:10:59,757
and I blew it.
280
00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:01,359
What happened?
281
00:11:03,096 --> 00:11:05,296
I had been missing whistles
more and more often
282
00:11:05,332 --> 00:11:07,832
as I lost my hearing in
the high frequencies.
283
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,000
So there I was;
284
00:11:09,135 --> 00:11:12,503
I'm on this breakaway
to win the championship.
285
00:11:12,539 --> 00:11:15,239
I look over my shoulder
and no one's chasing me.
286
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:16,908
Not a soul in sight.
287
00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:19,144
I think, "oh, the ref
must have blown the whistle,"
288
00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:20,812
so I dumped the puck in the corner.
289
00:11:21,981 --> 00:11:23,681
What are you doing?!
290
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,250
DJ, what are you doing?
291
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:26,651
But the ref hadn't blown the whistle.
292
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,787
Broggsville had just made a very,
very bad line change.
293
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:31,255
That sounds humiliating.
294
00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:32,296
It gets worse.
295
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:34,726
Broggsville comes in,
they pick up the puck,
296
00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:35,993
they go end-to-end...
297
00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:38,195
they score with 1.4 seconds left...
298
00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:40,798
and win the game.
299
00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:43,667
I let my team down, like a loser.
300
00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:45,737
Like a stupid, deaf loser.
301
00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:46,805
Tsk...
302
00:11:46,940 --> 00:11:48,973
I never played hockey again.
303
00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:50,542
Is that how you remember it?
304
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:51,876
Who are you?
305
00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:56,748
Aw, yeah!
306
00:11:56,750 --> 00:11:57,949
I've got polarized contacts.
307
00:11:58,018 --> 00:12:00,685
I didn't see anything but,
uh, reflections.
308
00:12:00,687 --> 00:12:03,621
Ow! Oh! Alright!
309
00:12:03,657 --> 00:12:04,956
Ow, where is it?
310
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,891
Guys, a little help? Alright.
311
00:12:08,128 --> 00:12:10,361
Yeah. Gah! Okay! That's okay...
312
00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:13,164
The Crier said you were
the number one store in town,
313
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,301
but all I see is steamin'
hot number twos, baby!
314
00:12:16,436 --> 00:12:17,969
Uh, where... I... come on!
315
00:12:19,206 --> 00:12:20,605
Eat you up for lunch!
316
00:12:20,607 --> 00:12:22,373
Alright, just spitballing here,
317
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,842
but does anyone wanna try
taking the puck from 'em?
318
00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:26,077
- This is horse shit.
- They're too good.
319
00:12:26,106 --> 00:12:27,546
Enough with the excuses!
320
00:12:27,607 --> 00:12:30,581
When they're bigger,
use sharper weapons.
321
00:12:30,617 --> 00:12:31,783
That sounds dangerous.
322
00:12:31,785 --> 00:12:33,184
And illegal.
323
00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:35,987
It's me, Mark Morkley.
324
00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,388
Your old linemate.
325
00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:38,923
Morkster?
326
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:41,259
- Yeah.
- Oh my God!
327
00:12:44,531 --> 00:12:45,763
Diane Sawyer!
328
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,333
Listen...
329
00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:51,202
Your mind is all twisted up
about that day.
330
00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:53,138
Sure, you may have dumped the puck
331
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:55,807
and cost us the championship, but...
332
00:12:55,876 --> 00:12:57,275
that's not how you let us down.
333
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:04,549
What are you doing?!
What are you doing?!
334
00:13:04,551 --> 00:13:06,450
Get back here, DJ!
335
00:13:08,087 --> 00:13:10,755
You were the glue who held
our team together, man.
336
00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:13,224
My captain, my MVP.
337
00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:17,028
And when you abandoned us,
we abandoned ourselves.
338
00:13:17,163 --> 00:13:20,732
Is that why you gave up and
started working at the arena?
339
00:13:20,734 --> 00:13:22,233
Oh.
340
00:13:22,269 --> 00:13:23,968
No, I can see why you think that,
341
00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:25,436
- but I don't work here, man.
- Oh.
342
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,238
I'm just here to renew a contract.
343
00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:29,974
I got into ice resurfacing machines,
344
00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:32,410
so I'm a multi-millionaire.
345
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,678
Wow, that's awesome!
346
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:36,380
That makes me really happy,
that you landed on your feet,
347
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:39,050
'cause I hated that my
deafness held us back.
348
00:13:39,119 --> 00:13:40,351
No, listen to me...
349
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,429
No, no, no, no.
350
00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:44,122
We all have our crosses to bear, okay?
351
00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:46,024
I got four penalties, right?
352
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:48,593
Sasso hit the post four times.
353
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:51,729
And Hilliker, he was high as
a goddamned kite out there.
354
00:13:51,731 --> 00:13:53,063
So, you mean...
355
00:13:53,099 --> 00:13:54,732
I didn't cost us the game?
356
00:13:54,734 --> 00:13:56,801
Shh, shh, shh...
357
00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:58,136
We cost us the game.
358
00:13:58,271 --> 00:14:00,571
You're costing your team
the game right now.
359
00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:02,073
Oh, shit.
360
00:14:02,208 --> 00:14:04,541
I abandoned them again.
361
00:14:04,578 --> 00:14:05,943
I gotta go!
362
00:14:12,786 --> 00:14:14,084
Ugh!
363
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,287
This is so embarrassing.
364
00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:17,788
We are still in it!
365
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:19,090
No, we're not.
366
00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:21,125
It's not over until it is over!
367
00:14:21,127 --> 00:14:23,093
Are you kidding me?
It's definitely over.
368
00:14:23,129 --> 00:14:24,428
I want to die.
369
00:14:24,464 --> 00:14:26,497
This is still anyone's game.
370
00:14:26,633 --> 00:14:28,333
Look... DJ's back!
371
00:14:28,335 --> 00:14:30,168
Found my water bottle.
372
00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:31,636
And I'm never leaving you again.
373
00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:38,910
Ever.
374
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:42,046
♪ Looks like we made it ♪
375
00:14:42,181 --> 00:14:46,050
♪ Look how far we've come, my baby ♪
376
00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:48,653
♪ We might have took the long way ♪
377
00:14:49,989 --> 00:14:53,324
♪ We knew we'd get there someday ♪
378
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:59,063
♪ They said,
"I bet they'll never make it" ♪
379
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:03,768
♪ But just look at us holding on ♪
380
00:15:06,039 --> 00:15:08,006
You better not lose this for me!
381
00:15:08,141 --> 00:15:10,874
♪ We're still together,
still goin' strong ♪
382
00:15:12,946 --> 00:15:14,545
Get outta my crease!
383
00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:16,480
♪ You're still the one I run to ♪
384
00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:18,382
What kind of a ringer are you?
385
00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:20,618
♪ The one that I belong to ♪
386
00:15:20,687 --> 00:15:22,420
Deej, Deej!
387
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:26,290
♪ You're still the
one I want for life ♪
388
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:29,026
You're all a bunch of potatoes!
389
00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:30,828
♪ You're still the one that I... ♪
390
00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:33,130
Time out! Time!
391
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:34,631
You're fired! You're all fired!
392
00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:36,668
Oh my God, DJ, you're incredible!
393
00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:38,035
Yeah, we needed you.
394
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:40,471
It pains me to admit,
but we were rudderless without you.
395
00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:43,140
I don't know,
some of us stepped up in your absence.
396
00:15:43,176 --> 00:15:44,375
Appreciate it, team.
397
00:15:44,411 --> 00:15:45,910
But it ain't over till it's over.
398
00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,145
- Oh, that's wise.
- So true.
399
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:49,914
I literally just said
that exact same thing.
400
00:15:50,049 --> 00:15:51,749
One more goal for the win. Let's go!
401
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,684
- It's still anyone's game.
- Yeah!
402
00:15:53,687 --> 00:15:55,686
- Another great point.
- Let's win this thing!
403
00:15:55,689 --> 00:15:57,288
Let's use sharper weapons
because they're bigger.
404
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:59,257
You know how I say that all the time?
405
00:15:59,259 --> 00:16:01,325
_
406
00:16:17,410 --> 00:16:19,677
- _
- DJ, over here!
407
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,645
- No, no, no!
- DJ, pass!
408
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:22,689
DJ, I'm open!
409
00:16:22,716 --> 00:16:23,948
It's Keeran time!
410
00:16:24,083 --> 00:16:25,516
Ahh, damn.
411
00:16:26,853 --> 00:16:30,020
No!
412
00:16:37,263 --> 00:16:38,429
You played great, buddy.
413
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,765
I had one chance to impress
the girl of my dreams
414
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,666
- and I blew it.
- Don't let this define you.
415
00:16:42,712 --> 00:16:44,234
Why do we fall, Keeran?
416
00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:45,837
So we can learn to pick ourselves up.
417
00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:47,105
Batman Begins.
418
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:49,306
Did Batman end up with
the girl of his dreams?
419
00:16:49,308 --> 00:16:51,108
Oh, no, she blew up in an explosion.
420
00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:52,576
You're right.
421
00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:56,146
I should talk to her before
she blows up in an explosion.
422
00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,450
Hey, great game. Impressive.
423
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:00,918
Wait a second, aren't you the guy
424
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:03,454
- that puked on me on that ride?
- Oh, you remember me.
425
00:17:03,589 --> 00:17:05,390
Yeah, there's no coming back
from that, dude.
426
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:06,857
Also, you suck at hockey.
427
00:17:07,854 --> 00:17:10,828
Totally. Wanna laugh about it
over an ice cream sandwich?
428
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:11,896
No.
429
00:17:11,898 --> 00:17:13,931
Caught the game.
430
00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:16,000
Wanna swap spit?
431
00:17:16,002 --> 00:17:17,434
More than anything!
432
00:17:28,014 --> 00:17:29,614
Good game, Carlito.
433
00:17:29,616 --> 00:17:33,417
Who's the number one sporting
goods store now, ese?
434
00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:35,286
Yeah, I don't really
hear whispering very well
435
00:17:35,421 --> 00:17:36,554
so I didn't catch that.
436
00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:38,022
But I picked up
on the threatening tone, though.
437
00:17:38,112 --> 00:17:40,291
Oh, I apologize.
438
00:17:40,325 --> 00:17:41,425
I said...
439
00:17:41,429 --> 00:17:45,362
Who's the number one
sporting goods store now, ese?
440
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,565
Ah. Thanks for speaking up.
441
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:48,733
Still us, though.
442
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:50,368
No hockey game can change the fact
443
00:17:50,503 --> 00:17:53,237
that I have the best
damn team in the world.
444
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,839
Damn.
445
00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:56,907
That's cheesy as hell, bro.
446
00:17:56,976 --> 00:17:59,343
Goons! Vamos!
447
00:17:59,479 --> 00:18:01,712
I am one with the Gods!
448
00:18:01,714 --> 00:18:03,547
Car-li-to!
449
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:06,117
Attention, staff. I have some news.
450
00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:08,852
Attention, staff. I have some news.
451
00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:11,021
Cynthia, this is for you.
452
00:18:11,057 --> 00:18:12,857
Great, my jersey. Thank you.
453
00:18:12,992 --> 00:18:14,125
What...?
454
00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:15,792
Wait, what is that?
455
00:18:15,829 --> 00:18:17,461
That's a captain's C.
456
00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:20,664
Cynthia, when I came back from
my two-period spiritual journey,
457
00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:23,000
the score of that game should
have been 30 to nothing,
458
00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:24,335
not 9-1.
459
00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:25,670
How did we score the one goal,
by the way?
460
00:18:25,704 --> 00:18:28,606
Oh, I scored, of course,
after Carlito left the net
461
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,208
to try and slash Chris's achilles.
462
00:18:30,210 --> 00:18:32,543
I had to lock myself in the penalty box.
463
00:18:33,074 --> 00:18:34,612
Nice.
464
00:18:34,681 --> 00:18:37,348
Well, Wayne told me that in my absence,
you stepped up.
465
00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:39,149
I never said that. Can't prove it.
466
00:18:39,185 --> 00:18:40,418
You didn't quit on OMT.
467
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:42,219
You're my co-captain on the ice
468
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:44,555
and you're my co-captain in the store.
469
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:47,425
Which is why I'd officially
like to make you...
470
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:49,627
co-manager.
471
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,562
I don't think the others
would go for that.
472
00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:52,631
- Hell, yeah!
- Yeah, of course we would.
473
00:18:52,693 --> 00:18:53,565
- Why wouldn't we?
- I'm indifferent.
474
00:18:53,616 --> 00:18:57,034
- Come on. What do ya say?
- Uh...
475
00:18:57,070 --> 00:18:59,369
I say...
476
00:19:02,142 --> 00:19:03,507
Yes!
477
00:19:05,145 --> 00:19:07,444
Didn't you also have some news to share?
478
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,813
Oh, right. Um...
479
00:19:09,883 --> 00:19:13,384
I increased our line of credit, so...
480
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:15,519
tonight's bill is covered.
481
00:19:15,522 --> 00:19:17,187
- Yeah!
- Okay, okay...
482
00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:18,656
That's what I'm talking about!
483
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:20,258
I didn't even know
we had a line of credit.
484
00:19:20,291 --> 00:19:22,193
Classic Cynthia right there!
485
00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:24,362
- Thanks, new boss.
- Ahh.
486
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:26,230
Classic DJ.
487
00:19:34,873 --> 00:19:35,873
_
488
00:19:36,142 --> 00:19:38,008
- Another round, please, barkeep.
- _
489
00:19:38,044 --> 00:19:40,477
And hey, weren't we supposed
to talk about something
490
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:41,513
after the game?
491
00:19:41,547 --> 00:19:42,547
Right...
492
00:19:42,549 --> 00:19:45,383
I, uh, wanted to tell you...
493
00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:46,851
I'm gonna do it.
494
00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:49,353
Amazing. Do what?
495
00:19:49,488 --> 00:19:51,255
Open Brittle House on the Prairie!
496
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:52,556
That's incredible!
497
00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:55,325
Next week,
I'm going to Brussels to study
498
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:57,995
under the best
brittle-maker in the world.
499
00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,163
Wow.
500
00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:00,631
How... how long are you going for?
501
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:02,333
Six months. Maybe longer.
502
00:20:02,468 --> 00:20:04,435
You inspired me.
503
00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:07,972
Well, uh,
what did you want to talk to me about?
504
00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:09,707
Oh, nothin'.
505
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:11,042
I, um...
506
00:20:11,177 --> 00:20:12,609
I should get back to work.
507
00:20:30,529 --> 00:20:32,396
Yeah, that's a Gwen tear, alright.
508
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:36,934
You wanna see Shania with me?
509
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:38,302
More than anything.
510
00:20:38,304 --> 00:20:39,403
Let's do this.
511
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:40,671
Get him, get him, get him!
512
00:20:40,806 --> 00:20:42,373
Move him back, move him back!
513
00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:43,674
Pull him back, pull him back!
514
00:20:43,809 --> 00:20:45,075
Yay!
515
00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:48,011
M-V-P! M-V-P!
516
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:50,347
M-V-P! M-V-P!
517
00:20:50,383 --> 00:20:53,351
This is great...
518
00:20:56,889 --> 00:20:59,156
No one's ever hoisted me before.
519
00:20:59,158 --> 00:21:03,427
♪ One more time...
One more time... ♪
520
00:21:03,463 --> 00:21:05,696
What a gesture!
521
00:21:06,966 --> 00:21:08,865
♪ One more time! ♪
522
00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:14,171
♪ Tell me one more time,
as you turn and face the wall ♪
523
00:21:14,173 --> 00:21:19,510
♪ Tell me I should know you
never were my kind of woman ♪
524
00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:24,048
♪ And tell me we
were fools to fall ♪
525
00:21:24,183 --> 00:21:29,519
♪ Baby, baby, tell me that
you never wanted my lovin' ♪
526
00:21:29,555 --> 00:21:33,056
♪ Baby, baby,
tell me that you never ♪
527
00:21:33,092 --> 00:21:34,559
♪ Tell me, tell me one more time ♪
528
00:21:34,639 --> 00:21:36,493
I love you guys!
529
00:21:36,529 --> 00:21:38,028
♪ One more time! ♪
37039
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