All language subtitles for One More Time - 01x01 - Unselfish UnSaturday.BAE.English.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,556 --> 00:00:01,807 Alright, team. 2 00:00:02,056 --> 00:00:04,970 As you all know, today isn't just any old Saturday. 3 00:00:04,972 --> 00:00:06,238 Oh, no. 4 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,373 Today is our annual fundraiser where half our proceeds 5 00:00:08,376 --> 00:00:11,910 are donated back to the fine people of Korverton. 6 00:00:11,912 --> 00:00:13,178 That's right... It's... 7 00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:15,080 Insane Insaturday, we know. 8 00:00:15,215 --> 00:00:16,348 Oh, not this year, Wayne. 9 00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:18,183 It turns out the name "Insane Insaturday" 10 00:00:18,318 --> 00:00:19,385 was actually incredibly offensive 11 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,386 to insane people, so... 12 00:00:21,455 --> 00:00:23,989 This year I've gone ahead and officially changed 13 00:00:23,991 --> 00:00:27,359 the name to... 14 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,361 Unselfish Unsaturday. 15 00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,462 What is "Un-Saturday"? 16 00:00:30,498 --> 00:00:31,930 Sounds like any day but Saturday! 17 00:00:31,966 --> 00:00:33,265 Yeah, I tried to warn him. 18 00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:34,733 No, I get it, boss. You were going for alliteration. 19 00:00:34,809 --> 00:00:37,136 Alliteration? Try "Selfless Saturday." 20 00:00:37,271 --> 00:00:38,403 How's that? 21 00:00:38,406 --> 00:00:39,604 Damn, that's way better. 22 00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:40,773 Where is Keeran? 23 00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:42,040 Late again. 24 00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:44,075 My guess? Probably saw a pretty girl on his bike, 25 00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,611 got his boner tangled in his handlebars, 26 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:47,679 and crashed into a telephone pole. 27 00:00:47,715 --> 00:00:50,549 To be 16 again. 28 00:00:50,618 --> 00:00:52,751 You know what I got a boner for? 29 00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:53,819 Helping people. 30 00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:55,087 Dicey segue! 31 00:00:55,089 --> 00:00:58,356 That's why this year we are gonna hit $20,000 in sales, 32 00:00:58,426 --> 00:01:00,225 a goal we've never hit before! 33 00:01:00,227 --> 00:01:02,093 Yeah, but we have been sniffing it for years! 34 00:01:02,129 --> 00:01:03,462 That's right, Cyn. 35 00:01:03,597 --> 00:01:07,532 But this year, we're gonna dip our noses all the way in. 36 00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:09,301 'Cause I'm throwin' in a little incentive, 37 00:01:09,370 --> 00:01:11,726 a reward for each and every one of you. 38 00:01:11,761 --> 00:01:12,704 What is it? 39 00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:15,507 Let's just say it's something we all need and love. 40 00:01:15,642 --> 00:01:17,709 - Need... - Huddle up, team. 41 00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,312 Our customers could shop at Sports Dynasty 42 00:01:20,381 --> 00:01:22,381 or any other fancy big box store, 43 00:01:22,383 --> 00:01:25,050 but they choose to shop at One More Time. Why? 44 00:01:25,185 --> 00:01:26,551 'Cause our stuff is used and cheap. 45 00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:29,120 Oh yeah, baby. But that's not the only reason! 46 00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:32,458 They shop here because they know we care. 47 00:01:32,593 --> 00:01:34,926 The point is, when we open those doors, 48 00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:37,396 the customers are gonna spread through this store 49 00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:38,963 like ringworm on a wrestling mat. 50 00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:40,198 Uh, DJ? 51 00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:41,667 They're gonna do that because we listen. 52 00:01:41,669 --> 00:01:43,468 - DJ? - We understand them. 53 00:01:43,504 --> 00:01:44,570 DJ? 54 00:01:44,572 --> 00:01:46,404 They're gonna come because we pay attention. 55 00:01:46,474 --> 00:01:48,073 - Hey, boss? - Yeah, Jen? 56 00:01:48,208 --> 00:01:49,975 I think Cynthia's trying to say something. 57 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:51,176 Oh, I'm sorry, Cynth. 58 00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:53,345 You know I have a hard time hearing when I'm talking, 59 00:01:53,414 --> 00:01:55,247 and you're on my right side; That's my bad ear. 60 00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:56,615 - Oh, right. - Or if you're behind me, 61 00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:58,349 'cause the mics only face forward. 62 00:01:58,385 --> 00:02:00,485 I just wanted to point out that we actually opened 63 00:02:00,488 --> 00:02:02,420 four and a half minutes ago. 64 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:04,289 Look at that. 65 00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:08,160 Carried away by my own pre-game speech, again. 66 00:02:08,229 --> 00:02:09,427 Alright, gang. 67 00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,864 Let's bring it in! 68 00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:13,098 Three, two... 69 00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:14,633 One More Time! 70 00:02:14,702 --> 00:02:16,801 Oh, that was a good one. We were really in sync. 71 00:02:16,871 --> 00:02:19,437 You guys feel that one? Good omen for the day. 72 00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:26,511 Hey! Can you do me a favour? 73 00:02:26,514 --> 00:02:28,280 What do we think about this reward DJ mentioned? 74 00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:30,848 I have no idea, but I need you to cover my shift tomorrow. 75 00:02:30,885 --> 00:02:32,584 I've got training for the olympic javelin qualifiers. 76 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,052 Oh, you and your meaningless hobbies. 77 00:02:34,121 --> 00:02:35,921 Anyway, back to my thing. It's gotta be cash, right? 78 00:02:35,990 --> 00:02:37,522 We're grown-ups. Grown-ups give each other cash. 79 00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,123 It's unspoken, but everybody knows it. 80 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:40,325 You must be fun for Christmas. 81 00:02:40,394 --> 00:02:41,660 We gotta sell hard. 82 00:02:41,729 --> 00:02:42,994 'Cause I got my eye on this microphone. 83 00:02:43,030 --> 00:02:44,997 It's gonna take formidable failures to that next level. 84 00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,264 You know my podcast? 85 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,066 Oh, how could I forget the way you revel in 86 00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:50,435 people's lowest moments? So can you take my shift or not? 87 00:02:50,504 --> 00:02:52,937 That's a negatory. 88 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:55,974 I don't want to. 89 00:02:56,109 --> 00:02:58,143 What if we make it interesting? 90 00:02:58,145 --> 00:02:59,544 What are you suggesting? 91 00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:01,213 I out-sell you, you take my shift. 92 00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:02,814 You out-sell me, 93 00:03:02,816 --> 00:03:05,284 I'll give you whatever that very special reward is. 94 00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:06,751 You're on. 95 00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:09,121 But you have made a grievous mistake, Hauser. 96 00:03:09,123 --> 00:03:10,222 Please. 97 00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:11,690 I can sell this stuff in my sleep. 98 00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:13,425 You haven't even cared about this job since 2015. 99 00:03:13,494 --> 00:03:15,560 That's not true. I started here in 2015. 100 00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:16,961 I haven't cared since 2017, 101 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,964 and yet somehow I'm still indispensable. 102 00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,433 Imagine what my powers would be if I actually gave a shit. 103 00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:25,570 Now, if you'll excuse me, I... 104 00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:27,672 have some shit to give. 105 00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:36,181 Well, well, sneakin' in the side door, Keeran? 106 00:03:36,316 --> 00:03:37,983 Sorry I'm late. 107 00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:39,183 What, handlebar boner? 108 00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:40,385 No, not this time. 109 00:03:40,520 --> 00:03:42,321 I got doored and I twisted my ankle. 110 00:03:42,323 --> 00:03:43,789 It hurts so bad! 111 00:03:43,791 --> 00:03:45,323 Honestly, I shouldn't even be here. 112 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:46,992 - Where's DJ? - Whoa, whoa, whoa. 113 00:03:47,061 --> 00:03:48,393 We need the full squadron today. 114 00:03:48,528 --> 00:03:50,095 I'm in a lot of pain, Wayne. 115 00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,596 Yeah, well, it just so happens, 116 00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:53,999 there's a huge reward in it for us if we hit 20g in sales. 117 00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:55,467 There's not enough money in this world 118 00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:56,534 to tolerate this pain. 119 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,069 Wait! No, no, no, no... what about... 120 00:03:58,105 --> 00:04:00,805 uh, what about breasts? 121 00:04:00,807 --> 00:04:03,207 - What? - You heard me, Padawan. 122 00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:05,210 Are there enough breasts in this world 123 00:04:05,212 --> 00:04:08,280 for you to tolerate that pain? 124 00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:12,684 Seriously, man. What are you talking about? 125 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:14,753 Well, it just so happens, 126 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,554 I heard the big reward is Jojo's. 127 00:04:16,624 --> 00:04:18,156 - The strip club? - Shh! 128 00:04:18,158 --> 00:04:19,358 It's supposed to be a surprise! 129 00:04:19,493 --> 00:04:22,027 Isn't that a weird surprise for your employees? 130 00:04:22,162 --> 00:04:23,428 Well... 131 00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:24,963 Boobs bond mother and child. 132 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:26,265 Why not co-workers, right? 133 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:27,833 That is true. 134 00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:31,169 Holy shit... My first strip club! 135 00:04:31,238 --> 00:04:32,437 Oh, wait... 136 00:04:32,572 --> 00:04:34,039 I'm not old enough. I won't get in. 137 00:04:34,108 --> 00:04:35,173 Don't worry about that. 138 00:04:35,209 --> 00:04:37,509 DJ, he's got a side deal with the bouncer there. 139 00:04:37,644 --> 00:04:39,544 It's a little quid pro quo, if you will. 140 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:40,812 We gotta hit that 20 grand. 141 00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:42,981 That's the spirit. Now how's that ankle feeling? 142 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,149 What ankle? 143 00:04:44,218 --> 00:04:45,223 Hi-yah! 144 00:04:46,587 --> 00:04:48,787 Ah, you're good, you're fine. Sell, sell, sell. 145 00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:53,591 Hello, sir. 146 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,661 How you doing? Can I help you with anything? 147 00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:56,995 My nine-year-old insists 148 00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,262 it's pinching his forehead. 149 00:04:58,299 --> 00:04:59,397 - Pardon me? - I got this. 150 00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,534 Um... may I? 151 00:05:02,536 --> 00:05:05,604 His son's baseball helmet 152 00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:09,207 is pinching his forehead. 153 00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:11,276 Right. Okay, thanks, Jen. 154 00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:13,011 Well, it sounds like he's outgrown it. 155 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,345 You're gonna wanna size up. 156 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,880 We got a great selection of helmets 157 00:05:15,916 --> 00:05:18,116 just behind those tennis balls right there. 158 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,085 So... 159 00:05:20,154 --> 00:05:22,687 I spent the last three months 160 00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:26,624 taking intensive sign language classes. 161 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,726 Pretty good, eh? 162 00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:29,160 Very good, very impressive. 163 00:05:29,229 --> 00:05:31,363 But you know I don't know sign language, right? 164 00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,797 What? 165 00:05:32,866 --> 00:05:35,534 Oh, I'm so sorry, I just... assumed. 166 00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:36,835 Oh, no need to apologize. 167 00:05:36,904 --> 00:05:39,704 What I miss with my ears, I fill in with body language, 168 00:05:39,707 --> 00:05:43,307 lip reading, and context. 169 00:05:43,344 --> 00:05:45,043 Hm. 170 00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:58,523 Is it just me, or is this turn-out a little underwhelming? 171 00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:00,458 It is lower than underwhelming. 172 00:06:00,594 --> 00:06:03,061 It is sub-underwhelming! 173 00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:06,798 My projections point to a 60% decrease in revenue. 174 00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:09,734 The excess inventory's gonna eat into our quarterly profits, 175 00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:12,069 consequently hindering our capacity to borrow, 176 00:06:12,106 --> 00:06:15,340 ergo affecting our ability to access further inventory, DJ. 177 00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:16,942 - So it's bad? - Correct. 178 00:06:17,077 --> 00:06:19,577 I knew it as soon as you said "ergo." 179 00:06:19,646 --> 00:06:22,680 I think this is the right one. 180 00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,750 Is there sound coming out? 181 00:06:25,786 --> 00:06:29,287 Big sale! 50% of the proceeds go to... 182 00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:32,056 I guess now you'll never know, so... 183 00:06:34,494 --> 00:06:35,560 Hey, sis! 184 00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:37,229 - Hi. - What's up, Josh? 185 00:06:37,364 --> 00:06:38,830 Yo! 186 00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:40,632 Lookin' like one of those guys off the Vegas strip. 187 00:06:40,767 --> 00:06:42,067 Oh, thanks, man. 188 00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:44,569 Uh, Josh, make sure to give me a five-star review, please. 189 00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:46,037 - You were late. - You were late. 190 00:06:46,039 --> 00:06:47,305 Shut up. 191 00:06:47,341 --> 00:06:49,708 Yo, tell piss jug about what's happening at Sports Dynasty. 192 00:06:49,710 --> 00:06:51,108 What's going on at Sports Dynasty? 193 00:06:51,145 --> 00:06:52,310 Oh man, they're slammed! 194 00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:53,578 Got a whole carnival thing going on. 195 00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:55,247 Rides, games... even a magician! 196 00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:56,614 A magician? 197 00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:58,450 - I love magic! - I know. 198 00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:01,186 I bet Carlito knew that too. 199 00:07:01,188 --> 00:07:02,887 Who's Carlito? 200 00:07:02,956 --> 00:07:04,822 The manager at Sports Dynasty. 201 00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:06,258 I've told you this like a million times. 202 00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:07,491 You've never told me that once. 203 00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:08,827 - You never listen! - You never listen to me! 204 00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:10,295 - Are you kidding? - I listen to you all the time. 205 00:07:10,392 --> 00:07:13,231 I don't hear you sometimes, but I always listen... 206 00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:15,734 Shh! Just shut up. 207 00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:17,869 Well, now I know why the store's so empty. 208 00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:20,438 Care to drown your sorrows with a cold one on me? 209 00:07:20,441 --> 00:07:22,874 - I'll put it on my spill tab. - No... 210 00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:25,076 There's something I need to do. 211 00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:26,411 Gwen's working. 212 00:07:26,413 --> 00:07:28,213 Gwen's working? 213 00:07:28,282 --> 00:07:30,348 I guess I am a little parched. 214 00:07:30,350 --> 00:07:32,017 No... 215 00:07:32,019 --> 00:07:35,287 There's something I need to do. 216 00:07:35,289 --> 00:07:36,688 Cynthia? 217 00:07:36,690 --> 00:07:39,658 Grab a stack of coupons and meet me out front. 218 00:07:39,660 --> 00:07:41,660 Josh? Have a great day at work, buddy. 219 00:07:41,662 --> 00:07:42,727 Thanks, man. 220 00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,062 Nat, think you could give us a ride over? 221 00:07:44,064 --> 00:07:45,196 Oh my gosh, I would love to, 222 00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:46,798 but you have to request it through the chauffeur app. 223 00:07:46,833 --> 00:07:47,865 No, come on, I'm your brother! 224 00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:48,967 Just give me a ride over. 225 00:07:48,969 --> 00:07:50,034 Oh wait, I got another request. 226 00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,102 - Flesh and blood! - Yeah, I can't drive you, bye. 227 00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:52,704 - No way you got a ride that quick. - Yeah, I just got a request. 228 00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:54,239 - Bing, it just popped in. - Are you kidding me? Watch my... 229 00:07:54,253 --> 00:07:56,709 - You almost rolled over my foot again. - I was trying to. 230 00:07:56,792 --> 00:07:58,810 Always appreciate your loving support. 231 00:07:58,879 --> 00:07:59,938 I can't hear you. 232 00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,521 Oh, DJ, look. 233 00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:10,721 Pretty tall guy. 234 00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,790 Terrifying. 235 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,327 Whoa, okay! 236 00:08:15,462 --> 00:08:16,528 Ah! 237 00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:18,329 My God, look at that sleight of hand! 238 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:19,731 Yeah! 239 00:08:19,866 --> 00:08:22,199 What are the chances this is all just a big coincidence? 240 00:08:22,236 --> 00:08:24,669 Carlito's wanted to put us out of business 241 00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,339 ever since you made manager over him. 242 00:08:27,474 --> 00:08:28,806 Don't you see? 243 00:08:28,876 --> 00:08:31,075 This is Carlito's way! 244 00:08:31,111 --> 00:08:33,411 Doesn't he see? He isn't just hurting me. 245 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,580 He's hurting all of Korverton! 246 00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:37,615 - And me. - Yes. 247 00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:38,883 Hand me those coupons. 248 00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:41,953 Oh, uh... right. Just go easy on those coupons. They're 249 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:45,222 - going to kill our bottom line. - Time to make it rain coupons. 250 00:08:45,259 --> 00:08:48,025 Hey! Come on down to One More Time! 251 00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,761 Oh, all the way to the top, tough guy! 252 00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,166 Hello, my dear. 253 00:08:55,168 --> 00:08:57,702 I'm looking for a pair of skates for my son. 254 00:08:57,837 --> 00:08:59,570 Oh, no problem. What's his size? 255 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,773 - Thirteen. - Okay. 256 00:09:01,842 --> 00:09:03,641 I'm just gonna grab them from the top shelf. 257 00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:06,311 - Okay. - All the way up there. 258 00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:17,888 Argh! 259 00:09:17,925 --> 00:09:19,324 You got this, Keeran. 260 00:09:19,393 --> 00:09:20,926 Think of the breasts. 261 00:09:22,195 --> 00:09:24,095 And their eyes, of course. 262 00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:26,697 Did I hear someone was looking for a pair of size thirteens? 263 00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:27,932 These beauties just came in. 264 00:09:27,935 --> 00:09:29,500 Why don't I ring 'em up for you? 265 00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:30,541 Okay. 266 00:09:34,556 --> 00:09:35,606 Augh... 267 00:09:35,642 --> 00:09:37,208 Aah! 268 00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,078 We're locally owned, 269 00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:42,814 we've been in the community since 1986. 270 00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:44,882 We may not have rides, but we've got spirit. 271 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,351 Sorry, sir. 272 00:09:46,353 --> 00:09:47,619 You can't be here. 273 00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:48,653 What? Why? 274 00:09:48,689 --> 00:09:50,855 Boss's orders. 275 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,859 That's pretty extreme. 276 00:09:54,861 --> 00:09:56,027 I'll say. 277 00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,495 Hey, can we just talk to Carlito? 278 00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,364 I feel like there's a big misunderstanding. 279 00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:01,366 Please, man, just walk away. 280 00:10:01,368 --> 00:10:03,835 I don't know why Carlito dislikes you so much, 281 00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:07,038 but his anger really stresses me out. 282 00:10:07,074 --> 00:10:09,907 Oh, that's the last thing I want for you. 283 00:10:09,909 --> 00:10:11,509 Really, this doesn't need to be that big of a deal. 284 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,645 Oh, but it does! 285 00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:17,515 Carlito. 286 00:10:17,551 --> 00:10:21,519 You got a lot of cojones showing up here today, hombre. 287 00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:22,586 Hi! 288 00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:24,055 Please enjoy the fair! 289 00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:26,124 The corn dogs are delicioso! 290 00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:28,593 Enjoy! 291 00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:31,529 You got a lot of nerve pulling a stunt like this today. 292 00:10:31,598 --> 00:10:34,331 Oh, is today a special day? Huh? 293 00:10:34,368 --> 00:10:36,200 A day you try to attract people to your 294 00:10:36,236 --> 00:10:37,935 rickety little hand-me-down store? 295 00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:39,937 Alright, cut the shit, Carlito! 296 00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:43,141 Let's settle this right now, mano a mano. 297 00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:45,410 Now you're speaking my language. 298 00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:46,644 Spanish! 299 00:10:58,625 --> 00:11:01,358 You, me, dunk tank. 300 00:11:01,395 --> 00:11:03,360 You dunk me, we leave. 301 00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:06,898 I dunk you, you cease the merriment immediately. 302 00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,599 You are grown men. 303 00:11:08,669 --> 00:11:11,970 No one is getting in a dunk tank. 304 00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:13,972 Your funeral, amigo! 305 00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:16,708 Dawg, hold my dog. 306 00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:19,177 I'ma dunk you like a donut, baby. 307 00:11:21,148 --> 00:11:23,248 Hey, how can I help? 308 00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:25,183 I'm almost sold on this skipping rope, 309 00:11:25,252 --> 00:11:26,851 but is it long enough for two? 310 00:11:26,986 --> 00:11:29,253 Only one way to find out, I guess. 311 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,123 Are you okay? 312 00:11:32,258 --> 00:11:35,459 You know what? I'm a little shaken up, but I'll live. 313 00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:37,394 I'm not gonna buy these. 314 00:11:38,565 --> 00:11:40,931 What's wrong with your leg? 315 00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:44,536 - That! - Oh my God, that's disgusting. 316 00:11:44,538 --> 00:11:46,070 Looks like a plum with veins. 317 00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,606 Dude, you gotta go home, or like... 318 00:11:48,608 --> 00:11:49,808 - to emergency. - No! 319 00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:51,075 I'm in it to win! 320 00:11:51,078 --> 00:11:52,243 I want this prize! 321 00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:55,914 Your dedication is both inspiring and inexplicable. 322 00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:58,817 Uh... here. At least wear this. 323 00:11:58,952 --> 00:12:00,084 That's merch! 324 00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:02,287 I'm sure DJ won't mind if it helps with this, 325 00:12:02,289 --> 00:12:04,088 I want to say life-threatening injury. 326 00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:06,491 Good point. I'll take it. 327 00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,526 Think you can help me? 328 00:12:08,595 --> 00:12:10,861 Jen? 329 00:12:13,867 --> 00:12:15,533 Uh, may I help you, please? 330 00:12:15,602 --> 00:12:17,234 - Dammit. - Just right this way. 331 00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:19,637 Hi. 332 00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:21,906 Think you can help me? 333 00:12:23,844 --> 00:12:27,411 They all want to play hockey. 334 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,522 Boom! 335 00:12:40,527 --> 00:12:41,860 Right this way. 336 00:12:41,862 --> 00:12:43,994 And yieu, and yieu, and yieu, and yieu, and yieu, and yieu, 337 00:12:44,030 --> 00:12:45,981 and yieu, and yieu, and yieu. 338 00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:49,667 Come on, let's go! 339 00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:51,002 Stop stretching! 340 00:12:51,071 --> 00:12:53,804 Get to it, deaf jam! Come on! 341 00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:56,474 Is this really the best use of our time? 342 00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:57,615 I don't know. 343 00:12:57,644 --> 00:12:59,611 Why don't you tell me? 344 00:12:59,746 --> 00:13:00,878 Aah! 345 00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:03,014 Swing and a miss, doo-doo arm! 346 00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,481 Would'a been cool if I'd hit it, though, 347 00:13:04,518 --> 00:13:06,417 the way I said the line as I threw it. 348 00:13:06,486 --> 00:13:07,819 Yeah, it would have been amazing. 349 00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:09,654 I'm the king of the world! 350 00:13:11,892 --> 00:13:14,091 This ain't hockey, mijo! 351 00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:15,893 You're in my playground now! 352 00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,629 You play in a recreational ping pong league! 353 00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:19,831 It's table tennis! 354 00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:20,932 And I'm not ashamed! 355 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,433 - Nor should you be! - Hey! 356 00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:23,968 Don't take my side! 357 00:13:24,103 --> 00:13:25,570 Hey, gee, relax! 358 00:13:25,639 --> 00:13:28,306 Hey, DJ, shouldn't you take your hearing aids out? 359 00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:30,141 They're not waterproof, right? 360 00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:32,377 Cynthia, if I take my hearing aids out, 361 00:13:32,379 --> 00:13:36,247 I'll be telling Carlito I expect him to dunk me. 362 00:13:36,382 --> 00:13:38,616 The mind is the most powerful weapon. 363 00:13:39,342 --> 00:13:42,320 Ooh! 364 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:44,989 Oh-ho! Not enough mustard! 365 00:13:45,025 --> 00:13:47,158 Looks like... augh! 366 00:13:48,527 --> 00:13:50,694 DJ! I told you... 367 00:14:00,940 --> 00:14:02,540 One, two, three, four. 368 00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:04,942 That was a punishingly effective underarm. 369 00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:10,414 Towels in aisle seven... 370 00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:13,084 Back to the bodega, potato man! 371 00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:18,823 Uh, DJ, just ignore him. 372 00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:26,897 We're gonna sign you up later. 373 00:14:26,933 --> 00:14:28,766 But I don't wanna. 374 00:14:28,835 --> 00:14:30,968 I saw what you said there. 375 00:14:31,104 --> 00:14:33,104 I too was small at your age. 376 00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:35,506 Then I became one of the best damn hockey players 377 00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:37,508 in Korverton. 378 00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:41,679 You can do anything you set your mind to. 379 00:14:41,814 --> 00:14:43,580 You're gonna love it. 380 00:14:48,421 --> 00:14:50,588 DJ? 381 00:14:50,627 --> 00:14:51,632 I get it. 382 00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:53,524 You're too young to use a butter knife 383 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,526 yet they wanna strap you to a couple blades 384 00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:58,796 that could cut clean through your achilles tendon. 385 00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:03,067 It's scary, but all the best things in life are. 386 00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:04,602 No, no, no, no... 387 00:15:07,374 --> 00:15:11,275 Sir... I saw you call yourself a huge fatty. 388 00:15:11,311 --> 00:15:14,679 Athletes come in all shapes and sizes, my man. 389 00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:21,151 DJ, cabs are the other way... 390 00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:30,461 Do you always keep a second pair? 391 00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:31,963 Five-second delay before they come on. 392 00:15:31,965 --> 00:15:35,767 Oh, of course, right. 393 00:15:35,769 --> 00:15:37,702 - You always keep a second pair? - And a little song. 394 00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:38,779 Oh. 395 00:15:42,008 --> 00:15:43,441 And we're back! 396 00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,476 You always keep a second pair of hearing aids on you? 397 00:15:45,478 --> 00:15:47,611 Of course. You never know when you're gonna find yourself 398 00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:49,780 humiliated in a public dunk tank showdown. 399 00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:51,048 I do know. 400 00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,783 It's never. 401 00:15:52,819 --> 00:15:55,319 Hey, I just wanna thank you for having my back over there. 402 00:15:55,322 --> 00:15:57,188 I disagreed with every choice you made. 403 00:15:57,323 --> 00:15:58,325 Yet you stuck by me. 404 00:15:58,391 --> 00:15:59,924 I was trying to talk you out of it. 405 00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:01,259 Still, you stayed by my side. 406 00:16:01,394 --> 00:16:03,827 Didn't wanna waste the money on two cabs, so... 407 00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:05,596 I'm trying to create a little moment here, Cynth, 408 00:16:05,598 --> 00:16:08,132 but you gotta meet me in the middle a little bit. 409 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,500 We should get back to work. 410 00:16:09,502 --> 00:16:12,136 All business. That's why I love ya. 411 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:15,572 Not gonna say it back, huh? 412 00:16:15,574 --> 00:16:16,807 No. 413 00:16:18,845 --> 00:16:21,345 Alright, bring it in, team. 414 00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:24,115 As you all know, today was supposed to be the electric 415 00:16:24,184 --> 00:16:27,017 first edition of Unselfish Unsaturday. 416 00:16:27,053 --> 00:16:28,285 It gets worse every time I hear it. 417 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:30,721 - It wasn't meant to be. - My head's spinning. 418 00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:33,091 I know, buddy. It's been an insane day. 419 00:16:33,226 --> 00:16:34,759 Sorry, crazy day. 420 00:16:34,828 --> 00:16:37,028 I would have thought it would take more than a few 421 00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:39,297 cheap fair rides and an incredible magician 422 00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:40,898 to lure away our dedicated community, 423 00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:43,692 but I was today years' old when I learned I was wrong. 424 00:16:43,727 --> 00:16:44,535 No cap. 425 00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:47,038 I guess it just goes to show you, doesn't it? 426 00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:49,974 Maybe I'm no longer relevant. 427 00:16:50,109 --> 00:16:51,175 Maybe... 428 00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:52,643 unfit to lead this team. 429 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:56,213 That's the wet man who said I could do anything! 430 00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:58,783 Maybe there's still hope! 431 00:17:05,959 --> 00:17:07,157 I'll be right with you. 432 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,293 I wasn't saying I'm a huge fatty, 433 00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:11,863 I was saying I'm gujarati! 434 00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,264 Oh, my bad, dude. 435 00:17:13,333 --> 00:17:14,999 I appreciate the message. 436 00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:16,934 I always wanted to be a jockey. 437 00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:18,736 Well, giddy-up, sir! Giddy-up. 438 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:21,205 Two water bottles. You should try another one. 439 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:22,940 Three kids? Three kids? I heard three. 440 00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:25,009 Did anyone help you today? 441 00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:26,276 Oh, yes. 442 00:17:26,312 --> 00:17:27,879 That would be Wayne. 443 00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:30,114 Did you come here because of my inspiring words? 444 00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:32,282 No, coupon. 445 00:17:32,318 --> 00:17:34,385 Total is $88.71. 446 00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:36,386 Love to see it. Big spender. 447 00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:39,390 Real firm grip... 448 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:41,225 This racket is actually fantastic. 449 00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:43,227 I'll come check you out. 450 00:17:43,362 --> 00:17:44,462 Perfect. 451 00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:47,231 Thank you. Do you want a receipt? 452 00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:48,966 There you go. Have a great day! 453 00:17:56,976 --> 00:17:58,910 Thank you. Take care. 454 00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:07,117 Unselfish Unsaturday is officially over. 455 00:18:07,153 --> 00:18:08,486 Alright, let's see the final tally! 456 00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:09,786 Oh, wait, wait, before you do that, 457 00:18:09,823 --> 00:18:11,989 can you let us know who sold more between me and Wayne? 458 00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:14,659 - We got a thing going. - Well... 459 00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:16,260 By $21, 460 00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:18,129 the winner is Wayne. 461 00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:19,396 - Yes! - What? No! 462 00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:20,597 You cannot compete with the Wayne-maker! 463 00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:22,466 - I was dominating out there! - Hey, hey, hey. 464 00:18:22,535 --> 00:18:24,669 Everyone was dominating out there. 465 00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:28,038 Alright, now, let's see the final tally. 466 00:18:28,074 --> 00:18:29,873 Ugh... 467 00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:33,443 $19,986. 468 00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,746 - We're off by $14? - That's so close! 469 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:37,715 Do we still get the reward? Come on! 470 00:18:37,717 --> 00:18:39,917 Obviously I'd love to reward you for your hard work, 471 00:18:40,052 --> 00:18:42,085 but I can't help but wonder... 472 00:18:42,087 --> 00:18:44,087 What's the point of setting goals if we're just gonna 473 00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:45,156 move the goal post? 474 00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:46,424 Ring it up! 475 00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:47,825 Jesus, what the hell happened to you? 476 00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:48,926 I blacked out, 477 00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:51,629 and I came to in a cubby hole in the breakroom. 478 00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:53,498 Did you guys know there was a cubby hole in the breakroom? 479 00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:54,732 I don't think there is. 480 00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,100 There's no cubby hole in our breakroom. 481 00:18:56,235 --> 00:18:57,935 Anyways, forget about the cubby hole in the breakroom. 482 00:18:58,004 --> 00:18:59,437 I grabbed this ankle brace from earlier 483 00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:00,771 and I haven't paid for it. 484 00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,507 Aw, buddy, I would never make you pay for that... 485 00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,943 I said ring... it... up! 486 00:19:06,078 --> 00:19:07,612 You heard the man. 487 00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:14,852 With this final purchase of the day, 488 00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:17,054 our total sales are... 489 00:19:17,123 --> 00:19:19,457 $20,016! 490 00:19:22,095 --> 00:19:23,494 Amazing! 491 00:19:23,563 --> 00:19:25,663 Oh, and, uh, make sure to give the sale to Jen. 492 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:26,964 She gave me the ankle brace. 493 00:19:27,099 --> 00:19:29,200 - Oh, oh! - No... no! 494 00:19:29,269 --> 00:19:31,669 Victory tastes so sweet! Nom, nom, nom! 495 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,638 Well, I promised you all a reward, 496 00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:37,274 and a reward you shall receive. 497 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:39,610 Who's up for wings at Angry Al's? 498 00:19:39,745 --> 00:19:42,446 Ah... 499 00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:44,615 - Angry Al's? - Wings. 500 00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:46,684 You said it was something we all need and love. 501 00:19:46,753 --> 00:19:49,954 Yeah, we all need a good hang after a hard day at work, 502 00:19:49,956 --> 00:19:51,622 and I'm pretty sure we all love wings, no? 503 00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:52,957 What about breasts? 504 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:54,391 You can order whatever you want, champ, 505 00:19:54,427 --> 00:19:56,661 but they're known for their wings. 506 00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:58,017 Come on! 507 00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:04,969 Another round for the 20-grand gang? 508 00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:06,370 - Yeah! - Oh... 509 00:20:06,505 --> 00:20:08,038 Well, who approved another round? 510 00:20:08,074 --> 00:20:10,574 And a virgin white Russian for the young warrior. 511 00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:11,775 I did. 512 00:20:11,811 --> 00:20:12,876 Wow, is that 2%? 513 00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:14,378 That might be too strong for you. 514 00:20:14,380 --> 00:20:15,479 Those new hearing aids, DJ? 515 00:20:15,615 --> 00:20:17,715 Uh, no. Very old, actually. 516 00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:19,984 Yeah, they weight about 17 pounds a piece, 517 00:20:20,053 --> 00:20:22,186 and they make me look like a deaf transformer, 518 00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:24,322 but they're always there when I need 'em. 519 00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:26,423 Well, I think you look great. 520 00:20:26,459 --> 00:20:28,726 Thank you. 521 00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:30,328 Gwen just flirt with you there? 522 00:20:30,463 --> 00:20:31,996 I mean... 523 00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,900 Nope. False alarm. 524 00:20:36,970 --> 00:20:38,902 Oh, I would, um, take it easy there. 525 00:20:38,972 --> 00:20:41,272 I forgot to mention that my shift tomorrow is a double. 526 00:20:41,274 --> 00:20:44,208 - Opening and closing. - Shouldn't count. 527 00:20:44,210 --> 00:20:46,310 All day at the store? Lucky guy. 528 00:20:46,446 --> 00:20:47,478 Come on! 529 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:49,480 Let's be bad girls! 530 00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:58,355 - We've lost him. - Hey guys, cheers! 531 00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:01,292 To an insane... a crazy... 532 00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:03,060 a good day! 533 00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:06,096 Alright! 534 00:21:36,268 --> 00:21:38,139 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 37668

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