Original subtitles

This is my boss,

Jonathan hart, a self-made millionaire.

He's quite a guy.

This is Mrs. H. She's gorgeous.

She's one lady who knows how to take care of herself.

By the way, my name is Max.

I take care of both of them,

which ain't easy, 'cause when they met...

It was murder.

[♪♪]

[Barks]

I only had the pleasure of meeting loring Nichols once,

and that was on a train between Boston and New York.

Yeah, we just bumped into each other,

and, uh, I told him an idea I had,

and he said, "kid, I like that."

You want that too? Certainly do.

He wrote me a check for $50,000.

I love that story.

I like it too. Gin.

Gin?

All right, senator, we'll see you down there. Bye-bye.

How was the senator? The senator's doing great.

Said he wouldn't miss this party for all the boll weevil's on his side of the isle.

Army archerd's column says the whole who's who

of the celebrity world's gonna be at this shindig.

I don't get this guy, Nichols. He's a hermit.

Why should he be throwing a big bash?

It's not just a party, Max.

It's the opening of his new resort.

Lot of people think this guy's dead.

Well, he is a... a recluse.

I'll say. He hasn't been seen in public for almost seven years.

You know, i... I'm sort of sorry

I won't be able to have a chance to meet this character.

Maybe we could sneak him in.

Yeah. No, no, no.

That's all right. You just drop me off in freeport.

I got a lucky table waiting for me there.

Not to mention a lucky lady.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Are you gonna play?

Certainly.

Gin.

Gin?

Yeah.

[♪♪]

[Classical music playing over stereo]

Morning, Mr. Nichols. Feeling better, are we, this morning?

Oh, I always feel better before you show up.

You're like one of those damned hospital nurses.

Feeling pretty good, and then all of a sudden

they come by with their needles and their thermometers.

Take that damn thing away.

Now, you know it's a good idea

to keep a check on your pulse.

Why? You did it yesterday. What do you wanna find out?

I've been from here to the bedroom and back.

How much stress is there in that?

Mr. Nichols, are you giving the doctor a hard time?

Oh, Victoria, would you take this quack away?

[Music stops] Oh, aren't you being unfair?

I didn't get to be one of the richest men in the world being fair.

Yes, but hasn't Dr. Barber made lots of pains go away?

Yeah, and everything else.

Which would you prefer, pain or euphoria?

Well, better use this arm.

The other one's a pincushion.

[Groans]

Victoria, what would I do without you?

Probably scold somebody else.

[Chuckles]

I've got some papers here

that need your signature.

Uh-huh.

Oh, I can taste that one already.

What kind of papers?

Routine. Mostly to do with the hotel. Proposals.

These glasses are obsol...

Obsolete.

As soon as you're up and around,

we'll get you an examination.

Have the lawyers looked at these papers?

Upside down and backwards.

There. All done.

He'll be out for at least four hours.

I'll put your music back on, Mr. Nichols.

[Classical music playing]

Well, now that that's taken care of,

our plan should proceed without a hitch.

I've got an hour to spare.

What are you up to?

[Man] Flowers for the lady.

Flowers for the lady.

[Steel drum music playing]

[Woman] How much for these?

Darling, did you realize The Bahamas was the first place

that Christopher Columbus set foot in the new world?

And he probably couldn't find a decent hotel room.

Oh, that was Henry de beauchamp's job.

I thought he had a restaurant in Beverly Hills.

Henry de beauchamp? He was a pirate.

That's the one.

He has a restaurant in Beverly Hills. He's a pirate.

Come on. Ah, no.

You gotta fill me in on the local color.

Flowers, sir? Flowers for the lady?

Oh, look. Oh, thanks very much.

Here you are.

[Jennifer] Ohh.

There you go, darling. Lovely. Thank you, darling.

Isn't that a beautiful hotel?

Ah, sure is.

They don't make them like that anymore.

[Jennifer] Henry de beauchamp built that hotel

as a wedding present to his new bride.

[Jonathan] How romantic. He's a man after my own heart.

Well, he's no loring Nichols,

but he certainly had his heart in the right place.

Well, so is mine. My heart, it's right next to me.

I know.

Mmm.

Mr. and Mrs. Hart.

Greetings. Welcome to The Bahamas excelsior.

Well, did you have a nice flight?

Very nice, thank you.

I'm Roger tween, the director.

Jolly good day, isn't it?

Very jolly, Roger. My wife was just saying the same thing.

Isn't this beautiful?

Yes, the old mansion's been refurbished,

maintaining the original architecture, of course.

Lovely.

It's very quiet.

Well, we're not officially open. Not until next week.

Uh, the people here are Mr. Nichols' special guests.

How is Mr. Nichols these days?

Frankly, we haven't seen him since his arrival.

We're hoping he'll make an exception in this instance.

Well, I certainly hope so.

Well, if you'd like to freshen up,

we'll see you for luncheon on the veranda.

Thank you.

[Jonathan] Mr. Tween.

[Local music playing]

You and John Forsythe are coming to town

to testify before my committee

about the wild mustang situation.

Yes, we are. I was flattered they asked me to join them.

Well, knowing you as well as I do,

you'll make a wonderful witness.

Does that mean we have your vote, senator?

No fair lobbying, now, on my own time.

I'm just here as a gentleman farmer.

Yes.

Oh, there's Victoria dickenson,

loring Nichols' right-hand lady.

Uh, Victoria.

Hello. [Senator] I read that article

in fortunemagazine about you, and it was wonderful.

Just wonderful. Well, thank you.

Uh, you know Jonathan and Jennifer hart.

[Both] How do you do?

I saw your article in town & Country.

I must say, your profiles fared far better than mine.

Well, thank you.

Uh, Victoria's being modest, as well as charming.

When she was a junior assistant

in congressman bellwood's office,

I knew then and there that this little lady would go far.

Oh, well, the senator from the south is recognized

for a little cornpone himself.

Oh, excuse me. I see Howard cosell over there.

I wanna go exchange some statistics.

[Laughs] Bye-bye, senator.

Bye.

Have you everything you need?

Yes, thank you.

Is there any chance of saying hello to loring?

Well, it's his wish to see as many as possible.

He made up the guest list himself.

There's people from the past he still holds fondness for.

We're very pleased that he included us.

E-Excuse me. I see some new arrivals.

Of course.

Thank you.

She's a lot younger than I imagined.

Mm-hm.

Very powerful lady.

The woman behind the throne.

Look who's over there. Scotty!

Jennifer.

Hi. Jonathan.

What are you doing here? Scotty, how are you?

Not what. Why?

We are about to hear my learned colleague's latest theory.

Uh, not yet.

But I will say we're all here to bear witness.

To what?

Uh-uh. Being the scrupulous reporter that I am,

I'm not ready to libel myself until I have all the facts.

But you do have a sound suspicion?

Sound?

[Laughs]

Funny you should say that. Take a look around.

Well, it certainly is the a group.

Impressive credentials. What do you wanna bet not a person in this place

has had anything to do with loring Nichols in the last four or five years?

Well, I haven't for 10 years.

But what's your point?

Well, that's the story for now. Film at 11.

Oh, come on, Scotty. You can't leave us hanging.

Okay. Look over there.

[Jennifer] Laura bishop.

The ex-Mrs. Loring Nichols.

Yeah, and ex-movie queen.

Nichols gave her up along with the business.

She has an audience with his nibs at 2:00.

Nichols has a whole wing up there.

And he's guarded like king Solomon's mine.

He domain is off-limits, unless you have the key.

Ah, and you are looking for the key?

I already made my own.

You've been up there?

Unofficially.

You've talked to him?

Soon. And if my theory is correct,

I could have the biggest scoop since Richard Nixon

left his footprint in his mouth.

Well, uh, listen, guys, I, uh, hate to gossip and run,

but there goes my pulitzer.

Bye-bye.

So long, Scotty.

Hmmm.

Hey, look over there.

The champ. The champ.

[Laughs]

Hey, champ.

Jonathan. How are you?

Jennifer. What's happening?

I gotta tell you. Next to me,

you're the prettiest people in town.

[Both chuckle]

Well, say, we saw your latest on television.

You are referring to my beer commercial?

Uh, no, I think it was baby powder.

I was beautiful, wasn't I?

[Chuckles]

Listen, uh, is it true?

Are you gonna hang up your gloves?

Well, cosell keeps bugging me about a comeback, and I told him,

I don't hit nobody for less than a million.

[Laughs]

[Sighs]

Did you have a pleasant trip?

Ah, yes, very nice. Thank you.

[Sighs]

Eddie, take us up to Mr. Nichols' suite.

Funny. I was married to the guy.

So why do I feel like I'm going to the principal's office?

[Victoria] Don't be nervous. Mr. Nichols is very anxious to see you.

[Knock on door]

[Man] Laura, come in please.

[Woman] Aren't you being a bit unfair?

[Camera clicking]

[Indistinct speech]

[Scotty] Two loring Nichols?

[Woman] Are you giving the doctor a hard time?

[Inaudible speech]

Uh, hi. Listen, I'm with the hotel.

I was getting some post card shots.

Uh, hey.

Look, he's not gonna be real happy about this,

so why don't we just forget it, and you give me the...?

Turn around.

Come on. Hey, buddy, look.

Great view you got there.

I'm just up here getting some... ah!

[People screaming]

[♪♪]

[Man] I, uh, appreciate you giving us the identification.

I know it's a rather grisly business.

[Jennifer] I think we must've been the last people to see Scotty.

Other than the person that helped him off the roof.

Uh, in point of fact, Mr. Hart,

uh, there is no indication of foul play.

Inspector, didn't you say

that there wasn't any film in the camera?

That is correct.

Well, doesn't that strike you as a little strange?

I didn't think photography was part of his work.

Well, he wasn't up on the roof to catch the view.

Frankly, Mr. Hart, there is some question as to, uh...

How he accomplished that.

Scotty told us that he was on to something big.

But he didn't say what it was?

Well, we don't think he actually knew.

No, but I think that he was getting close.

Mr. Hart, Mrs. Hart.

I-I appreciate your, uh,

distress at this most unfortunate accident.

Accident?

Incident.

I'm still haunted by what Scotty said.

What was that?

He said we were all here

to bear witness.

To what?

Murder.

[♪♪]

[Doctor] He'll be out for at least four hours.

[Victoria] I'll put your music back on.

This is the only tape you found?

Yes, miss dickenson.

- Pictures? - No, sir.

I don't like it.

There is nothing incriminating on this tape.

He was close, but...

You did the right thing.

Throw a man off a roof?

Michael, he fell.

An overeager reporter

going after some candids of the reclusive loring Nichols.

The police have bought it.

Why is it so difficult for you?

Victoria, I am a doctor.

I am supposed to save lives.

Michael, this is no time to recite the hippocratic oath.

Make sure this is destroyed.

Yes, ma'am.

Fox, there is one thing that I'm disturbed about.

How did that man get up on the roof?

I don't know.

Find out.

I don't want any other unannounced visitors.

Yes, ma'am.

You're not gonna fall apart on me now, are you?

Why do we have to have all these people?

How many times do I have to tell you,

I can't manipulate an empire

if everyone thinks the emperor doesn't exist.

I know. I know.

Do I have to remind you how long we've been working on this?

There were bound to be unexpected complications.

Why don't you go check on your patient?

Oh, that's fine. Thank you.

Oh, lovely.

Thank you.

Well, nothing like watching the bubbles go up

as the sun goes down. No toast?

Let's see.

To pirates and other lovers.

May they always keep up the tradition.

Aww. I'll drink to that.

Miss bishop. Hello.

Hello.

Do we know each other?

Uh, no, we don't. I'm, uh, Jonathan hart.

This is my wife Jennifer.

Nice to meet you.

We're fans. As a matter of fact, we have been for years.

Ah. Please don't tell me how long.

Would you like to join us?

Oh, no, thank you. I'm... I'm meeting someone.

Thank you.

I'm curious. I understand that you saw loring Nichols today.

Yes, his majesty deigned to see me.

And may I ask, what did you think?

Well, considering he's been in a cocoon for the last 10 years,

it wasn't any butterfly that popped out.

Oh, you're saying

that, uh, he's a little frayed around the edges?

Well, the truth is, he's not much different.

Loring always needed personality lessons.

Ah, there's my friend.

Very nice meeting you.

Nice meeting you. Nice meeting you.

She looks great, huh?

Oesn't she? D yeah.

Hello. Excuse me, may I have a word with you, Mr. Hart?

Certainly.

This is Dr. Barber, Mr. Nichols' personal physician.

How do you do, doctor?

How do you do?

Mr. and Mrs. Hart.

Mr. Nichols would like to know

if you would like to get together now.

We certainly would.

Mr. Nichols would prefer to see you alone.

He doesn't really know Mrs. Hart. You do understand?

Of course.

Dr. Barber would be delighted to keep you company.

You go on, darling.

I'll see you in a minute, darling, all right?

Willie, will you show Mr. Hart the way?

I'd be happy to.

Excuse me, doctor.

Doctor, would you show Mrs. Hart the casino?

Why, I'd love to.

Then I'd be delighted to see it.

Shall we?

[♪♪]

Mr. Nichols.

I could ask how you been,

but I know you've doing very well.

Lovely wife, very successful.

Not as successful as me, of course.

But doing very well.

Would you ever guess that $50,000

would bring you here today?

Well, I'm very flattered that you've been keeping tabs on me.

Not at all, not at all.

I don't send Christmas cards,

but I like to see what my friends are up to.

So that's the reason for the party?

Well, when you put a new rudder into an old ship,

you like to give her a proper launching, don't you?

You've launched a lot of ships.

I haven't read about you in the social pages of the New York times.

[Laughs]

I guess I'm just about as transparent as hell, aren't I?

I doubt that.

You want the truth?

Well, you always said that the truth

was, uh, what it was all about.

Yes, I did, didn't I?

It was, uh, too bad about Scotty.

Yes, it was. You know, that piece in the new yorker

back in 1970 was the best interview ever done on me.

Not flattering... I won't say it was flattering.

But truthful.

Why didn't he just take his place in line?

You were about to tell me the truth.

Oh, yes, well.

My board says that I need a board to tell me what to do.

Now, in the old days, I used to tell people what to do.

What did they tell you to do?

Well, they say you can't run a business in limbo,

that people are beginning to talk.

That "loring Nichols is here, is he there, is he dead,

or is he an old doddering fool,

spitting up all over himself?"

So we're all here to bear witness?

Right. That's good.

That's what Scotty said, 10 minutes before he died.

Bright boy, Scotty.

Brandy?

Thanks.

May I ask you a question?

Shoot.

Well, it's none of my business,

but, uh, you've been selling off a lot of your old interests,

and I have a considerable amount of your stock.

Is there anything I should know?

[Chuckles]

Oh, just creating a little cash flow.

I've got my eye on an airline.

Well, if you need my help,

you, uh, you will ask me, won't you?

Don't think that loring Nichols would hesitate

to call in your marker if he needed it.

How did it go?

All right.

What's wrong?

He was lying to me.

About what?

I don't know.

It was just something about him that didn't jell.

It was as if he couldn't look at me straight in the eye.

Hmmm.

Maybe he's having financial problems.

Well, whatever it is, something's going on.

Well, darling, you've only seen him once, and it was 10 years ago.

He's older now.

Yes, but a man with that kind of will doesn't change.

I'd like to get up there, where Scotty was.

But I thought we had to have a key to get on that floor.

That or a very tall man.

Get in the elevator and take it up to the top floor.

What are you gonna do?

I'll be on the observation deck.

Wait for my signal, all right?

[♪♪]

It's all right. I'm wearing, uh, elevator shoes.

Let her go.

Uhh-

what floor, please?

Uh, four, please.

Going up.

[Man] Is that you, Victoria?

Mr. Nichols?

Mr. Nichols, it's Jonathan hart.

Who?

Your friend,

Jonathan hart.

Oh, Jonathan, yes.

How are you?

Better than you.

What's going on?

Going on...

Going...

Don't worry, loring.

We'll get you out of here.

[♪♪]

[Woman] Is that you, Bernard?

Uh-huh.

You must be Bernard. She never stops talking about you.

Loring... Loring, tell me.

Loring, tell me...

What are you talking about?

Victoria, take it easy.

I wanna know.

I told you.

My friend Jonathan hart came to see me.

What is this gibberish?

Probably a coincidence. He imagined he saw him.

I found this on the balcony.

Hart was wearing a scarf like that

when I saw him at the Marina.

Get them up here. What are you gonna do?

It's unfortunate that loring Nichols' coming-out party

may have to be marred

by another accident.

I'm telling you, inspector, there are two loring Nichols.

But that in itself is not a crime.

Loring Nichols is a very powerful man.

He controls a great deal of real estate and a lot of money.

Anybody impersonating him,

possibly without his knowledge, is, uh...

Fraud, probably, yes.

Maybe murder for sure.

Mr. Hart, you are right about one thing.

Mr. Nichols is an extremely powerful and influential man.

He and his hotel are terribly important to this island.

Yeah, I get you.

We can't intrude into his quarters

without something more consequential.

Well, thanks, inspector.

I'll try to get a written confession from him.

So long.

[Dial tone humming]

Did you tell him about the drugs?

Yeah, I did. Ah, I don't blame him, it's...

It's just, we've gotta come up with something more.

Max's phone number. Where is that?

Uh, it's in the notebook by the bed.

I think we'll give Nichols and his crowd

a little Melvin and Howard.

[Knock on door]

Did you call room service?

No. You wanna get that?

Oh. Dr. Barber.

Mr. Hart is in?

Uh, yes. He's on the phone.

Would you get him, please?

What do you want?

Mr. Nichols would like to chat with both of you this time.

Oh, well, that's very nice,

but maybe tomorrow.

It's late, and I have a terrible headache.

I'm afraid this is a command performance.

Fox, tell Victoria the problem is resolved.

Willie, come with us.

Senator Eldridge, how are you?

Ah, I'm just fine. How are you?

Oh, well, isn't it amazing? I was just saying to Jonathan...

She was just saying to me that, uh,

why don't you join us in the bar for a drink?

Oh, and share a filibuster or two.

That's what she was saying.

Well, what a kindly thought.

There's nothing I'd like better. Good.

Here we go. Oh.

[Jennifer chuckles]

Well, I'll be doggone.

I went off and left my money belt.

I wanna hit the casino later.

Well, uh, we'll meet you in the bar, senator.

All right.

Number three, please.

Oh. They can't do anything here.

Do they know that?

Oh, Mr. Tween.

Hello.

We're a little in between.

Oh. Heh-heh!

Yes, uh, we have a slight problem.

Uh, nothing serious, I hope.

You see the two men behind us?

Yes. Dr. Barber and Danny, the bodyguard. Yes.

They're after us.

After you?

I'm sorry. I don't understand.

There are two loring Nichols.

Two? Oh. Oh, really? Oh.

[Chuckles]

It has something to do with fraud,

not to mention murder.

Murder?

Probably ours.

Murder, eh? Oh.

[Chuckling]

We'd like to have you call inspector jordon right away

and get him out here.

Yes. Yes, of course.

Absolutely.

[Chuckling]

[Laughing]

Well, uh, thanks very much for helping us, Mr. Tween.

[Men grunting]

If you were only et, we could fly.

[Jonathan] If I was e.T., we'd go home.

No games. I'd rather not have to shoot you tonight.

I'm sure.

Your game is more like volleyball off the roof.

[♪♪]

Are you awake?

Ugh. Uh-huh.

How you doing?

Well, this is definitely not my idea

of the way to get a good night's sleep.

I'm worried about Max.

He's supposed to go into his routine

the first thing this morning.

Fox, let them up.

Good morning. I hope you spent a cozy night.

I've brought you a change appropriate to today's activity.

What do you have in mind?

I thought something equestrian.

You do seem to like riding.

Oh, I know.

We're going to fall off of our horses and die.

Ah, very good.

And you haven't even seen the cliffs by the ocean yet.

Don't you think that this has been, uh,

rather an accident-prone weekend?

I would like you to change now.

And I hope you're going to be cooperative,

because fox here will just as soon break your necks.

How long do you think you can pull off this little masquerade?

Actually, I thought his ex-wife would be the big hurdle,

but she seemed to get along famously with loring.

I think Dr. Barber did a wonderful job of recreating him.

Now, I take some credit

for coaching him in the details of a marvelous life.

I only regret that you weren't convinced.

Mr. Hart, would you like to be the first to change?

What are you talking, he won't see me?

This is the director of the hotel.

Mr. Aldo...

Aldo beneducci. Nice to know you.

I come to see my buddy, loring Nichols.

I see. Do you have an invitation to the weekend?

I got a permanent invitation

for whenever I wanna show up.

Hmm.

Is, uh, ahem... Is Mr. Beneducci on the list?

Forget the list. You just get put your voice on the horn,

and tell loring Nichols that Aldo is here.

Well, you see, Mr. Beneducci...

You can call me Aldo.

You see, Aldo,

Mr. Nichols decides whom and when he will see.

"Whom"? For your information,

I'm the biggest "whom" in loring Nichols' life.

If not for this here whom,

loring Nichols wouldn't be in this here hotel.

The point being, I saved loring Nichols' life.

I see.

Well, why don't I just call Mr. Nichols' suite

and see if he's receiving?

That's what I said in the first place.

Yes.

[Victoria] Lovely.

Well, now, that's better. Are we ready?

Before we go, you might be interested to know

that I talked to the police last night.

Oh, and were they terribly concerned

about your speculations?

[Knock on door]

Tween's on the phone.

There's a man downstairs demanding to see Nichols.

Something about saving his life.

Well, who is he? An Aldo something or other.

Ask Nichols who he is. I just gave him a shot, he's out.

This man is really making a scene.

All right, let him up,

but make it fast and to the point.

Put a security guard on the door, fox.

Tie them up again. Yeah.

[Door closes]

Back down on the bed.

[♪♪]

What'll I say to this guy?

Well, just be civil.

He's probably some bum loring picked up.

He was always doing that.

Thanks, big boy.

Loring Nichols.

Heh-heh! Aldo.

[Chuckles lightly]

How are you?

Fine. You look great, loring.

Ah, excuse me.

This is my executive assistant, Victoria dickenson.

Mr. Beneducci, a pleasure.

Just call me Aldo.

Aldo. Tell me, how did you two meet?

Why don't you tell her?

Oh, um...

[Laughs] No, no.

Much more amusing coming from you.

Heh-heh!

Let's see...

It was seven years ago last week, right?

Right.

I was hacking out of Brooklyn, my regular garage.

I just had to run into Manhattan,

I'm headed for the bridge.

I'm cutting cross-town through the park,

when I spot this guy.

He's taking a stroll at 1:00 in the morning.

[All chuckle]

Well, there I am, crossing 72nd street,

when I spot four meatheads cruising this guy.

I say to myself,

"this guy's gonna wind up dog meat in the bushes

unless I do something."

[Laughs]

Go on, go on.

So I drive the cab over the curb.

These four guys take a dive.

Just about when they're ready to recover,

I throw it into reverse, and they really scatter them.

Then I open the door, and loring jumps in.

True, true, true.

What a time we had. Yes, yes, yes.

We must've hit every joint between there and bensonhurst.

Yeah. I'll never forget that night.

Neither will I.

[Max] I'm telling you, inspector,

if this guy's loring Nichols, I'm Robert redford.

I gave him a cock-and-bull story about us

that he lapped up as if it were his memoirs.

I didn't quite get who you are.

I'm Max. I work for the harts.

And what worries me is they ain't been around.

Nobody's seen them since last night.

I'm on my way, Mr. Max.

Where's fox?

He went to see Mr. Nichols.

Take them down in the service elevator.

We'll meet you at the stables.

Hart, no tricks,

or I'll pull her arm right out of the socket.

[Horse whinnies]

Hiya, champ, how's it going?

Hey, you surf in, Max?

Hey, Max, I didn't know you were here.

You haven't seen the harts, have you?

Not since yesterday.

I got a terrible feeling they got trouble.

That them?

[Max] It sure is.

That big guy's pretty cozy with Mrs. H. I don't like it.

Give me an arm?

You got both of them. Thanks.

Hey, darling, look at that.

There's Aldo beneducci and the champ.

Hiya, champ.

Hi. I've been looking for you.

Hiya. How's it going?

Fine, Aldo.

It's the pretty people again.

Champ, uh, you remember when we first saw each other?

When we arrived? You were telling me about that deal.

Deal? The deal with Howard cosell.

Putting up the million... Do you remember that?

Oh, you wanna see me do my buck-and-wing.

Oh, I'd, uh...

I'd love to see you do your buck-and-wing.

As a matter of fact, uh, I'd pay a million for it.

Thanks, champ.

You ought to see my time step.

You're still the greatest.

Wait here.

[Champ] Go get them, Jonathan!

Do you mind waiting for the next horse?

Hang on to her, champ, will you?

[♪♪]

Well, I guess you gave the doctor

a touch of his own medicine.

Yeah.

[Jennifer] Darling, I've been thinking.

Wouldn't it be fun to have a house on an island all our own?

[Jonathan] Like the pirate and his lady?

Oh, no. Nothing that grand.

We'd have nothing but 1000 guests every weekend.

No, no, no. I mean, something small just for the two of us.

And Max? Of course Max.

And freeway? Certainly freeway.

Maybe we could find something in the Caribbean.

Or the south pacific.

That'd be a tough commute to the office,

but it does sound nice.

And maybe we could throw in a good restaurant or two.

Oh, you're so spoiled.

A small movie house?

No.

Do we go with or without television?

I can do without television.

No Monday night football? No.

No Lakers games? No.

No chili from chasen's?

No, no, no.

No pasta from la scala? No.

Well, what about those little outfits

that you always buy from that place on rodeo drive?

I wasn't talking about giving up civilization completely.

Well, I'd give it all up for you.

Oh... If it would make you happy.

That's so sweet.

After all, home is where the heart is.

Or is it "where the harts are"?

Mmm.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]