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Previously on Young Sheldon...
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I now pronounce you
husband and wife.
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00:00:03,903 --> 00:00:04,905
You may kiss the bride.
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We'd like to pay
for a honeymoon.
5
00:00:08,606 --> 00:00:11,609
What would you say
to an all-expenses-paid
6
00:00:11,644 --> 00:00:13,512
weekend at Dollywood?
7
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- Shut up.
- Oh, my God.
8
00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:15,747
Thank you.
9
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Huh? Oh, that ain't good.
10
00:00:18,684 --> 00:00:21,620
Connie Tucker, please stop running.
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Why are you handcuffed?
12
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I was just...
13
00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:25,623
taking the baby for a walk,
14
00:00:25,658 --> 00:00:27,626
and Cagney and Lacey here
decided
15
00:00:27,660 --> 00:00:30,663
that I was evading arrest.
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How's that feel?
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00:00:36,936 --> 00:00:38,104
Unnecessary.
18
00:00:38,137 --> 00:00:39,506
You ran from the police.
19
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You're a flight risk.
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00:00:40,673 --> 00:00:42,640
She can't run.
She got a funky hip.
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00:00:42,674 --> 00:00:44,877
She can barely waddle.
Watch it.
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00:00:44,909 --> 00:00:46,579
You got a 50-yard radius
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00:00:46,612 --> 00:00:47,880
from the base.
24
00:00:47,912 --> 00:00:49,491
It'll beep when you get
close to the edge.
25
00:00:49,515 --> 00:00:51,783
If you cross it, we get a call.
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00:00:51,817 --> 00:00:54,487
If you tamper with it,
we get a call.
27
00:00:54,521 --> 00:00:56,256
Will it give her a little zap?
28
00:00:56,289 --> 00:00:57,524
No.
29
00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:58,790
Well, how's she gonna learn?
30
00:00:58,823 --> 00:01:00,792
Will it beep if I kill him?
31
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As long as it's within 50 yards,
32
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go for it.
33
00:01:05,298 --> 00:01:07,266
I can't leave the house?
34
00:01:07,299 --> 00:01:09,835
What the hell am I supposed
to do all day?
35
00:01:09,868 --> 00:01:11,570
I am way ahead of you. See?
36
00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:13,671
I stopped
and I picked up puzzles.
37
00:01:13,706 --> 00:01:17,909
Got us the Grand Canyon
and Dogs Playing Poker.
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00:01:17,942 --> 00:01:22,948
If I were to run right now,
would you shoot me?
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00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,986
♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪
40
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♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
41
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♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
43
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♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪
44
00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:44,236
Ooh. I found a corner.
45
00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:46,704
Congratulations.
Oh, come on.
46
00:01:46,739 --> 00:01:47,939
We can have a little fun.
47
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I have lost my business,
I have lost my home,
48
00:01:51,009 --> 00:01:54,712
I have lost my freedom,
and you want to have fun?
49
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A little fun.
50
00:01:56,814 --> 00:01:59,685
Do you not understand?
I could be going to jail.
51
00:01:59,718 --> 00:02:01,487
Oh, come on, please.
52
00:02:01,521 --> 00:02:04,722
They're not gonna send a sweet
old grandma to the pokey.
53
00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:06,057
Well, I hope not.
Ah.
54
00:02:06,091 --> 00:02:09,762
Well, tell me something
if you would.
55
00:02:09,794 --> 00:02:12,063
Is that sky or water?
56
00:02:12,098 --> 00:02:14,032
Let me see it.
57
00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:18,271
It's a good thing
that didn't go 50 yards.
58
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:20,306
You can still get it.
59
00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:23,543
Hey, we're back.
60
00:02:23,576 --> 00:02:25,211
Hey, hi.
61
00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:26,646
Where's my little girl?
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00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:29,981
Um, she's with Mary.
63
00:02:30,014 --> 00:02:30,915
Why?
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00:02:30,949 --> 00:02:34,253
Well, how do I put this?
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00:02:36,754 --> 00:02:38,890
What the heck is that?
66
00:02:38,924 --> 00:02:40,925
I'm under house arrest.
67
00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:42,228
Why?
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00:02:42,262 --> 00:02:43,329
We got busted.
69
00:02:43,562 --> 00:02:44,531
We?
70
00:02:44,563 --> 00:02:45,799
Me.
71
00:02:45,831 --> 00:02:47,031
Do they know about Georgie?
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00:02:47,064 --> 00:02:48,501
No, of course not.
73
00:02:48,534 --> 00:02:49,968
Your grandma's not a snitch.
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Which, by the way,
will serve you well
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00:02:52,037 --> 00:02:54,038
if you end up in the slammer.
76
00:02:54,072 --> 00:02:56,240
The pokey, the slammer.
What is it with you?
77
00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:57,843
I like cop shows.
You learn things.
78
00:02:57,877 --> 00:02:59,052
What about the Laundromat,
79
00:02:59,076 --> 00:03:00,513
the video store?
80
00:03:00,546 --> 00:03:02,080
They shut everything down.
81
00:03:02,114 --> 00:03:04,983
- God. So what are we
gonna do for money? - Yeah.
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00:03:05,016 --> 00:03:07,486
That's an excellent question.
83
00:03:09,889 --> 00:03:11,390
How was Dollywood?
84
00:03:11,424 --> 00:03:13,991
Magical. What are we gonna
do about money?
85
00:03:14,894 --> 00:03:16,429
Hey.
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00:03:16,462 --> 00:03:17,796
Hello.
87
00:03:17,830 --> 00:03:19,131
Studying for a test?
88
00:03:19,163 --> 00:03:20,966
Studying to take the bar exam.
89
00:03:20,998 --> 00:03:22,377
Meemaw's going
to need a smart lawyer.
90
00:03:22,401 --> 00:03:24,871
By the time we find one, I could
just learn how to do it.
91
00:03:24,903 --> 00:03:26,372
Seriously?
Common law
92
00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:28,173
was invented by a bunch
of English farmers
93
00:03:28,206 --> 00:03:30,042
in the Middle Ages.
I think I can hack it.
94
00:03:30,074 --> 00:03:31,644
All right, what do you got?
95
00:03:31,677 --> 00:03:34,347
Well, have you ever heard
of Vincent "The Chin" Gigante?
96
00:03:34,379 --> 00:03:35,281
He a boxer?
97
00:03:35,314 --> 00:03:37,584
He was originally.
Good for you.
98
00:03:37,616 --> 00:03:38,984
But he's better known
99
00:03:39,016 --> 00:03:40,586
as a major crime boss
who managed
100
00:03:40,620 --> 00:03:41,962
to stay out of prison
by employing the legal doctrine
101
00:03:41,986 --> 00:03:43,355
of mens rea.
102
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:44,824
Which is?
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00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:46,224
He pretended to be nuts.
104
00:03:46,258 --> 00:03:47,836
He wandered the streets
of New York in a bathrobe,
105
00:03:47,860 --> 00:03:50,027
he had poor personal hygiene,
he mumbled to himself...
106
00:03:50,062 --> 00:03:51,296
all the cuckoo classics.
107
00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:53,164
Yeah. If you need someone
to testify
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00:03:53,198 --> 00:03:54,843
that she's off her rocker,
you give me a call.
109
00:03:54,867 --> 00:03:56,168
Thank you.
110
00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,402
Toilet's backed up.
111
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What? Don't look at me.
I just got home.
112
00:03:59,973 --> 00:04:02,474
Yeah, but it's had years of you.
113
00:04:02,508 --> 00:04:05,076
I'll check it out.
114
00:04:05,110 --> 00:04:07,479
Come on, little buddy.
115
00:04:07,514 --> 00:04:09,046
You can do it.
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Talk to me.
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There you go.
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Let it out.
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00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:17,189
Aah!
120
00:04:21,026 --> 00:04:22,862
Years.
121
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♪ Pump it up. ♪
122
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Here's the estimate.
123
00:04:28,367 --> 00:04:30,002
I'm gonna need 50% down
to get started.
124
00:04:30,035 --> 00:04:31,403
Are you kidding me?
125
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:33,973
We're fixing a toilet,
not buying a car.
126
00:04:34,007 --> 00:04:36,074
Good thing
I wasn't going to college.
127
00:04:36,108 --> 00:04:38,218
Nothing's wrong with your
toilet. Septic tank is shot.
128
00:04:38,242 --> 00:04:40,413
What's a septic tank?
129
00:04:40,446 --> 00:04:42,324
It's basically a big container
under the backyard
130
00:04:42,348 --> 00:04:44,884
that's filled up with all your...
bathroom business.
131
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:47,084
Ew! I played in that yard.
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00:04:47,119 --> 00:04:48,788
Missy, not now. Come on, Phil.
133
00:04:48,821 --> 00:04:50,899
Isn't there some kind of friends
and family discount?
134
00:04:50,923 --> 00:04:53,158
I mean, we went
to high school together.
135
00:04:53,191 --> 00:04:56,194
Yeah, and you were mean to me.
136
00:04:57,297 --> 00:05:01,266
Oh, come on! I-I was mad
at the world, not just you!
137
00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:04,971
I ate that dirt.
138
00:05:05,004 --> 00:05:06,372
Did he fix it?
139
00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:07,540
Not quite.
140
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:08,574
And he's still a weasel.
141
00:05:08,608 --> 00:05:10,643
What'd he do?
Look.
142
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:13,110
What a weasel.
143
00:05:13,144 --> 00:05:14,557
What are we gonna do?
I mean, we're six people.
144
00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:15,882
We need a toilet.
145
00:05:15,915 --> 00:05:17,917
Don't worry.
Georgie, come with me.
146
00:05:17,951 --> 00:05:19,619
Where are we going?
I got a plan.
147
00:05:19,651 --> 00:05:21,252
Is it a good plan?
Yeah.
148
00:05:21,286 --> 00:05:26,559
All right. So I believe
that completes the sky.
149
00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:28,192
Satisfying, huh?
150
00:05:28,225 --> 00:05:29,928
So, what do you think?
151
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,331
Want to get some exercise,
152
00:05:32,365 --> 00:05:35,067
go for a walk
until you start beeping?
153
00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:37,134
Ha, ha, ha.
It's not funny.
154
00:05:37,168 --> 00:05:38,403
My life is in shambles,
155
00:05:38,437 --> 00:05:40,072
and I'm too old to start over.
156
00:05:40,105 --> 00:05:41,608
Oh, come on.
157
00:05:41,641 --> 00:05:43,207
You are not too old.
158
00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:47,112
Now, listen, you are a smart,
vibrant, perky woman.
159
00:05:47,144 --> 00:05:49,481
Perky?
Well, yeah, compared to me.
160
00:05:49,514 --> 00:05:51,617
And I'll tell you another thing.
161
00:05:51,651 --> 00:05:53,151
Your life's not over.
162
00:05:53,185 --> 00:05:58,024
You are writing a new chapter
in the book of you.
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00:05:58,057 --> 00:05:59,725
A book where
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a perky heroine rises up
165
00:06:03,528 --> 00:06:04,630
and...
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00:06:04,663 --> 00:06:06,399
And what?
167
00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:08,634
I don't know.
Y-You want to get drunk?
168
00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:10,134
Yes.
Great. I'm gonna
169
00:06:10,168 --> 00:06:12,081
run to the liquor store.
You want to come with me?
170
00:06:12,105 --> 00:06:14,339
Dale!
Right. Okay.
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Be back in a jiffy.
172
00:06:19,444 --> 00:06:22,548
God help me, I love him.
173
00:06:22,581 --> 00:06:25,117
All right, just a little bit more.
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00:06:25,149 --> 00:06:28,387
Oh, easy, easy.
There you go.
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00:06:28,420 --> 00:06:30,055
Yeah.
176
00:06:30,088 --> 00:06:32,024
Not bad, huh?
I don't know.
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00:06:32,057 --> 00:06:33,526
Might look better by the fence.
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00:06:33,558 --> 00:06:37,062
Look better?
It's a big plastic crap house.
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00:06:37,096 --> 00:06:38,564
Oh, dear Lord.
180
00:06:39,365 --> 00:06:42,067
You wanted a toilet? Voilà.
181
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:43,536
Where did you get it?
182
00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,247
From the high school.
We got, like, ten of 'em
183
00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:47,238
for visiting teams.
Yeah... give it a whirl.
184
00:06:47,273 --> 00:06:49,375
I'd rather die.
185
00:06:50,175 --> 00:06:51,377
Is there a light inside?
186
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:53,478
No.
Trust me, that's a good thing.
187
00:06:53,512 --> 00:06:55,380
We'll just tie a flashlight
to the handle.
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00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:58,250
Huh. I always wondered what
rock bottom would look like.
189
00:06:58,283 --> 00:07:00,386
Come on, at least check it out.
190
00:07:04,255 --> 00:07:06,559
I checked, I'm out.
191
00:07:08,494 --> 00:07:10,295
I can't thank y'all enough.
192
00:07:10,329 --> 00:07:12,365
Oh, don't be silly.
Stay as long as you need.
193
00:07:12,398 --> 00:07:14,466
It's only temporary.
Whatever.
194
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:17,136
We're just thrilled
to have you and the baby here.
195
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:18,370
And me, too, right?
196
00:07:18,403 --> 00:07:20,740
Yes, you'll be here, too.
197
00:07:22,141 --> 00:07:24,009
Well, let me give you a hand.
198
00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:25,577
Oh. Thanks.
Now, Georgie,
199
00:07:25,610 --> 00:07:27,814
if the police come for you,
what should we tell them?
200
00:07:27,846 --> 00:07:30,115
Mom.
I'm sorry.
201
00:07:30,149 --> 00:07:33,418
- I've never harbored
a fugitive before. - Mom!
202
00:07:38,593 --> 00:07:39,595
Who's that guy?
203
00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:41,096
It's Donny Osmond.
204
00:07:41,129 --> 00:07:42,531
Never heard of him.
205
00:07:42,564 --> 00:07:43,932
You know, Donny and Marie?
206
00:07:43,966 --> 00:07:46,468
Sometimes I forget
how old you are.
207
00:07:46,502 --> 00:07:48,504
Thank you.
208
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,372
I'm sorry about my mom.
209
00:07:50,404 --> 00:07:52,941
You kidding? We got a double bed
and an indoor bathroom.
210
00:07:52,975 --> 00:07:54,819
She can spit in my Corn Flakes,
and I'm a happy camper.
211
00:07:54,843 --> 00:07:57,612
Good, 'cause she might.
212
00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,514
Don't worry. I'll win her over.
213
00:07:59,548 --> 00:08:01,415
She thinks you ruined my life.
So?
214
00:08:01,449 --> 00:08:04,019
You thought I ruined your life,
and you married me.
215
00:08:04,052 --> 00:08:07,689
I called it. I said no good
would come of this marriage.
216
00:08:07,723 --> 00:08:09,557
Yeah, yeah, you said it a lot.
217
00:08:09,591 --> 00:08:11,225
You said it at the wedding.
218
00:08:11,259 --> 00:08:12,728
But, uh, still, you know, I...
219
00:08:12,761 --> 00:08:14,829
I think you could be
a little nicer to him.
220
00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:17,533
Sure, I can also go
out in the backyard
221
00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:20,636
and water the crabgrass.
222
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:23,504
We're gonna be okay, right?
Oh, of course.
223
00:08:23,538 --> 00:08:24,973
How can you be so sure?
224
00:08:25,007 --> 00:08:27,543
Hey, you didn't just marry a
pretty boy like Danny over here.
225
00:08:27,576 --> 00:08:29,778
Donny.
Yeah, him. You know,
226
00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:31,812
I'm the hardest worker
you'll ever meet.
227
00:08:31,846 --> 00:08:34,515
When I see something I want,
I don't stop till I get it.
228
00:08:34,549 --> 00:08:36,717
You are relentless.
229
00:08:36,751 --> 00:08:38,854
The good news is,
with Amanda back in the house,
230
00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:40,956
I can help her come
to her senses.
231
00:08:40,989 --> 00:08:43,725
Good plan. Hey, uh,
in the meantime,
232
00:08:43,759 --> 00:08:45,870
I was thinking of putting
Georgie to work at the store.
233
00:08:45,894 --> 00:08:48,864
There you go,
watering the crabgrass.
234
00:08:48,897 --> 00:08:51,200
It's not charity,
all right? He'll work.
235
00:08:51,232 --> 00:08:52,734
He's a criminal, Jim.
236
00:08:52,768 --> 00:08:55,836
And what I want is
to take care of you and CeeCee
237
00:08:55,870 --> 00:08:58,539
and maybe someday
a Georgie Junior Junior.
238
00:08:58,573 --> 00:09:00,075
You mean George the Third.
239
00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:02,778
No, that's too fancy.
He'd get his ass kicked.
240
00:09:02,811 --> 00:09:04,879
- Mm, yeah.
- And for your information,
241
00:09:04,913 --> 00:09:07,582
those little backroom
slot machines are all over town.
242
00:09:07,615 --> 00:09:09,116
How do you know?
243
00:09:09,918 --> 00:09:12,688
People tell me stuff.
244
00:09:12,721 --> 00:09:16,557
I... I just got...
I got one of them faces.
245
00:09:16,591 --> 00:09:18,994
I had a plan
to avoid using the porta-potty.
246
00:09:19,027 --> 00:09:21,028
I just had
to get through the night
247
00:09:21,062 --> 00:09:23,565
until I could get back
to my dorm in the morning.
248
00:09:23,599 --> 00:09:25,801
I lowered
my overall liquid intake,
249
00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:27,869
skipped my pre-bed
chamomile tea,
250
00:09:27,903 --> 00:09:31,072
and gave my bladder
a stern talking to.
251
00:09:31,105 --> 00:09:33,341
My bladder did not listen.
252
00:09:40,682 --> 00:09:42,017
I can do this.
253
00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:43,561
My body may have been weak,
254
00:09:43,585 --> 00:09:45,052
but my mind was strong.
255
00:09:45,086 --> 00:09:46,922
I just needed
to think about this situation
256
00:09:46,955 --> 00:09:48,657
in a different way.
257
00:09:48,691 --> 00:09:50,959
Instead of a porta-potty,
it was a TARDIS.
258
00:09:50,993 --> 00:09:53,928
Instead of Sheldon,
I was Doctor Who,
259
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:57,832
whose urine was ready to travel
through space and time.
260
00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:00,067
For those who aren't familiar,
261
00:10:00,101 --> 00:10:02,770
the TARDIS is bigger
on the inside.
262
00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:05,707
This one, however,
was smellier on the inside.
263
00:10:05,741 --> 00:10:08,943
I can't do this.
264
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:11,513
I'm not proud of this,
but that night,
265
00:10:11,546 --> 00:10:15,082
I relieved myself inside
Billy Sparks' chicken coop.
266
00:10:15,116 --> 00:10:17,720
Until my wife,
those hens were the only females
267
00:10:17,754 --> 00:10:19,821
I ever exposed myself to.
268
00:10:22,090 --> 00:10:24,760
I guess
I could have left that part out.
269
00:10:24,793 --> 00:10:26,028
Oh, well.
270
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:28,096
More bacon?
271
00:10:28,129 --> 00:10:29,664
Pile it on.
272
00:10:29,698 --> 00:10:30,732
Good morning.
273
00:10:30,767 --> 00:10:33,735
Morning. Have a seat.
274
00:10:33,769 --> 00:10:35,937
Georgie made us breakfast.
Isn't that nice?
275
00:10:35,971 --> 00:10:38,105
Oh, well, look at that.
Thank you.
276
00:10:38,139 --> 00:10:39,875
My pleasure.
277
00:10:39,908 --> 00:10:41,318
I guess I'll just have to run
to the supermarket later
278
00:10:41,342 --> 00:10:42,911
and get some more eggs
279
00:10:42,943 --> 00:10:46,014
for that cake
I was going to make.
280
00:10:46,048 --> 00:10:49,051
Oh, no problem.
I-I can go to the grocery store.
281
00:10:49,084 --> 00:10:51,986
Oh. Apparently
we're not job-hunting today.
282
00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:55,356
Oh, speaking of jobs.
283
00:10:56,357 --> 00:10:58,326
Good luck to you, son.
284
00:11:00,961 --> 00:11:04,066
Meemaw. Meemaw.
285
00:11:04,099 --> 00:11:05,900
Meemaw.
286
00:11:06,702 --> 00:11:08,437
What?
287
00:11:08,470 --> 00:11:10,673
Oh, my, you look terrible.
288
00:11:10,706 --> 00:11:11,673
Are you sick?
289
00:11:11,707 --> 00:11:13,809
Of life, yes.
290
00:11:13,841 --> 00:11:15,210
Oh, good. That's not contagious.
291
00:11:15,243 --> 00:11:17,746
Get in here.
The light's killing me.
292
00:11:17,779 --> 00:11:19,880
You smell like alcohol. Yucky.
293
00:11:22,719 --> 00:11:25,120
Look who came to visit.
294
00:11:25,153 --> 00:11:27,022
- Oh, great.
- You will
295
00:11:27,054 --> 00:11:29,033
think it's great when you hear
the brilliant legal strategy
296
00:11:29,057 --> 00:11:30,892
I have to keep Meemaw
out of prison.
297
00:11:30,926 --> 00:11:32,927
I thought
you were a science guy.
298
00:11:32,961 --> 00:11:35,496
I am, but sometimes
I like to spread my wings.
299
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:37,799
Oh, okay. Uh, proceed.
300
00:11:37,834 --> 00:11:38,866
What do you got?
301
00:11:38,899 --> 00:11:40,302
It's simple.
302
00:11:40,335 --> 00:11:42,145
We argue under Article 46-B
of the Texas Penal Code
303
00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:45,139
that you're unfit to stand trial
due to mental incompetence.
304
00:11:45,173 --> 00:11:47,542
You-you want to tell 'em
I'm crazy?
305
00:11:47,576 --> 00:11:50,278
Yes. And keep this look.
It really bolsters our case.
306
00:11:51,546 --> 00:11:52,715
Has this worked before?
307
00:11:52,749 --> 00:11:53,750
It has.
308
00:11:53,783 --> 00:11:55,616
Oh. Well, that's good news.
309
00:11:55,649 --> 00:11:58,855
The bad news is, you'll probably
be institutionalized.
310
00:11:58,886 --> 00:12:02,057
You-you... you want me
to go to the nuthouse?
311
00:12:02,090 --> 00:12:04,192
I want you
to stay out of prison.
312
00:12:04,225 --> 00:12:07,730
Oh, Moon Pie, thank you.
Thank you so much.
313
00:12:07,764 --> 00:12:08,929
I really do
314
00:12:08,964 --> 00:12:10,631
appreciate it, but I'm fine.
315
00:12:10,664 --> 00:12:13,702
You know, I have a buddy
whose nephew is a lawyer.
316
00:12:13,735 --> 00:12:15,070
He's gonna help us out.
317
00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:16,937
Is this because
I haven't passed the bar yet?
318
00:12:16,971 --> 00:12:18,750
Because that's just a formality.
A monkey could do it.
319
00:12:18,774 --> 00:12:22,076
No, I... I think that I'd just
feel a little more comfortable
320
00:12:22,110 --> 00:12:23,779
if I was getting advice
321
00:12:23,812 --> 00:12:27,982
from somebody who had a little
more professional experience.
322
00:12:28,015 --> 00:12:31,019
Okay. I mean, I've been
doing this for a day and a half,
323
00:12:31,052 --> 00:12:33,020
but suit yourself.
324
00:12:36,357 --> 00:12:39,161
Got your eggs,
everything on the list.
325
00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:40,928
Thank you.
326
00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:42,230
Also filled out an application
327
00:12:42,264 --> 00:12:44,099
- to be a bag boy
while I was there. - Oh.
328
00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:47,501
Wonderful.
My son-in-law, the bag boy.
329
00:12:47,536 --> 00:12:49,037
It's only temporary.
330
00:12:49,070 --> 00:12:50,873
I'll make my way up to cashier,
331
00:12:50,907 --> 00:12:53,107
then night manager,
then manager-manager,
332
00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:56,378
then regional supervisor, then
it's just a hop, skip and a jump
333
00:12:56,411 --> 00:12:58,880
to HQ. That's short
for headquarters.
334
00:12:58,914 --> 00:13:01,817
You can do all that
without a high school diploma?
335
00:13:01,850 --> 00:13:04,485
If you're a member
of the can-do club.
336
00:13:06,321 --> 00:13:08,355
God help me.
337
00:13:09,124 --> 00:13:12,059
I'll just put these away.
338
00:13:16,264 --> 00:13:18,966
What's the can-do club, and
why is my mom so mad about it?
339
00:13:22,037 --> 00:13:24,874
What are you doing?
340
00:13:24,907 --> 00:13:26,183
Cleaning out these rain gutters.
341
00:13:26,207 --> 00:13:27,809
Otherwise,
the water gets backed up
342
00:13:27,844 --> 00:13:29,543
and wrecks havoc on your roof.
343
00:13:29,577 --> 00:13:31,947
Wreaks... havoc.
344
00:13:31,980 --> 00:13:33,157
No, I'm pretty sure it's wrecks,
345
00:13:33,181 --> 00:13:35,182
'cause that's what it do.
346
00:13:38,855 --> 00:13:41,022
Oh, look at that.
347
00:13:41,056 --> 00:13:43,024
Audrey, is this your Wham-O?
348
00:13:43,057 --> 00:13:46,260
Audrey?
349
00:13:46,293 --> 00:13:49,798
And the wolf said,
"I'm gonna huff
350
00:13:49,831 --> 00:13:52,299
and puff
and blow your house down."
351
00:13:52,334 --> 00:13:55,971
Don't worry. Daddy'll never
let that happen to you.
352
00:13:56,004 --> 00:13:57,840
I'm gonna keep you safe.
353
00:13:57,874 --> 00:13:59,573
Uh-oh.
354
00:13:59,607 --> 00:14:01,576
Somebody needs a new diaper.
355
00:14:01,610 --> 00:14:04,111
Come on, let's get you one.
356
00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,313
Oh, hey.
357
00:14:06,347 --> 00:14:07,960
She's got you
and Mandy's good looks, but...
358
00:14:07,984 --> 00:14:10,284
phew... she poops like her dad.
359
00:14:10,317 --> 00:14:12,354
Lovely.
360
00:14:16,091 --> 00:14:17,994
Your grandma's coming around
on me.
361
00:14:18,025 --> 00:14:19,427
Yeah, she is.
362
00:14:21,198 --> 00:14:22,911
The good news is,
I've had some encouraging talks
363
00:14:22,934 --> 00:14:25,168
with the district attorney,
and I think that we can...
364
00:14:25,202 --> 00:14:28,139
Hang on.
How old are you?
365
00:14:28,172 --> 00:14:30,441
I know I look young, but I'm 24.
366
00:14:30,475 --> 00:14:32,878
You bring me a child attorney?
367
00:14:32,911 --> 00:14:35,980
Well, you were about to take
advice from a 14-year-old.
368
00:14:36,014 --> 00:14:37,414
Oh, who's that?
I might know him.
369
00:14:37,447 --> 00:14:38,893
Oh, just finish up
what you were saying.
370
00:14:38,917 --> 00:14:40,118
Right. A deal can be made
371
00:14:40,150 --> 00:14:41,754
without going to trial.
372
00:14:41,787 --> 00:14:44,054
You plead guilty, pay a fine,
lose your business license,
373
00:14:44,088 --> 00:14:45,856
maybe some community service,
374
00:14:45,889 --> 00:14:47,859
probation, but no jail time.
375
00:14:47,892 --> 00:14:49,528
So I'll lose the gambling room,
376
00:14:49,562 --> 00:14:53,298
- but I can keep the Laundromat
and the video store? - No.
377
00:14:53,331 --> 00:14:55,866
Those are all considered a part
of the criminal enterprise.
378
00:14:55,899 --> 00:14:57,000
They get confiscated.
379
00:14:57,034 --> 00:14:58,970
What if I fight it?
380
00:14:59,003 --> 00:15:00,171
On what grounds?
381
00:15:00,205 --> 00:15:02,440
I didn't have an
illegal gambling room.
382
00:15:02,475 --> 00:15:04,744
I collected...
383
00:15:04,777 --> 00:15:06,378
antique slot machines.
384
00:15:06,410 --> 00:15:07,879
It was my hobby.
385
00:15:07,912 --> 00:15:09,080
And the evading arrest?
386
00:15:09,114 --> 00:15:10,981
I was just taking my
great-granddaughter
387
00:15:11,014 --> 00:15:12,817
for a brisk stroll.
388
00:15:12,851 --> 00:15:13,951
I'm confused.
389
00:15:13,985 --> 00:15:16,120
Did we start the insanity thing?
390
00:15:16,153 --> 00:15:17,889
I think you should
take this deal.
391
00:15:17,922 --> 00:15:19,390
Put everything behind you,
392
00:15:19,423 --> 00:15:20,424
get on with your life.
393
00:15:20,457 --> 00:15:22,293
What life? I have no life.
394
00:15:22,326 --> 00:15:23,193
You have me.
395
00:15:23,227 --> 00:15:24,697
Yeah, yeah.
396
00:15:24,730 --> 00:15:26,297
What if I had something
397
00:15:26,331 --> 00:15:27,732
to offer?
398
00:15:27,767 --> 00:15:31,001
Then maybe I could keep my
businesses and skip the fine?
399
00:15:31,034 --> 00:15:32,236
What are you thinking?
400
00:15:32,269 --> 00:15:34,807
That greedy rat of a
cop I was paying off.
401
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:35,807
Rutledge?
402
00:15:35,841 --> 00:15:37,274
He's the one who flipped on you.
403
00:15:37,307 --> 00:15:38,811
Son of a bitch.
404
00:15:38,844 --> 00:15:41,413
You can't even trust
a dirty cop these days.
405
00:15:41,446 --> 00:15:43,114
Come on, Connie.
Yeah.
406
00:15:43,148 --> 00:15:45,450
No one wants to see
a grandma behind bars.
407
00:15:45,484 --> 00:15:46,451
Great-grandma.
408
00:15:46,485 --> 00:15:47,720
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
409
00:15:47,753 --> 00:15:48,721
How old are you?
410
00:15:48,754 --> 00:15:50,053
None of your business.
411
00:15:50,755 --> 00:15:51,823
So,
412
00:15:51,856 --> 00:15:53,457
do I tell 'em we have a deal?
413
00:15:53,491 --> 00:15:55,460
Okay, fine.
414
00:15:55,494 --> 00:15:56,360
Oh, thank God.
415
00:15:56,394 --> 00:15:58,429
I'm too old
to find somebody new.
416
00:16:09,808 --> 00:16:11,576
What are you doing?
417
00:16:11,610 --> 00:16:13,244
Making a withdrawal.
418
00:16:13,278 --> 00:16:17,315
You put a hole in my wall
and hid money in it?
419
00:16:17,347 --> 00:16:18,283
It seemed safe.
420
00:16:18,316 --> 00:16:20,217
I mean, who'd look
for money in this dump?
421
00:16:21,019 --> 00:16:22,419
Why do you need it?
422
00:16:22,453 --> 00:16:23,955
Legal fees.
423
00:16:23,988 --> 00:16:25,389
Maybe a new gambling room.
424
00:16:25,423 --> 00:16:27,158
Mom.
By the way,
425
00:16:27,192 --> 00:16:30,061
what is that porta-potty
doing out there in your yard?
426
00:16:30,094 --> 00:16:32,029
We're having plumbing issues.
427
00:16:32,062 --> 00:16:33,532
We need a new septic tank.
428
00:16:33,566 --> 00:16:34,999
Ouch.
429
00:16:35,033 --> 00:16:36,400
Tell me about it.
430
00:16:37,903 --> 00:16:39,871
How much you got in there?
431
00:16:39,904 --> 00:16:41,004
None of your business.
432
00:16:41,038 --> 00:16:42,607
It's in my wall!
433
00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:44,075
It's the devil's money, Mary.
434
00:16:44,107 --> 00:16:46,311
You don't want it.
I don't care.
435
00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:49,013
Last night, I went to pee and
there was a snake in there.
436
00:16:49,047 --> 00:16:50,447
Here you go.
437
00:16:51,817 --> 00:16:53,885
Get yourself
some indoor plumbing.
438
00:16:53,918 --> 00:16:56,489
Oh, Mommy, thank you.
439
00:16:59,190 --> 00:17:01,392
Snake's back! Snake's back!
440
00:17:06,330 --> 00:17:08,365
Nice house.
441
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:10,367
Got the job.
442
00:17:10,401 --> 00:17:12,103
Part-time bag boy.
443
00:17:12,135 --> 00:17:14,573
Well. They let you take
the apron home?
444
00:17:14,606 --> 00:17:16,509
Aw, shoot.
445
00:17:18,009 --> 00:17:19,319
That's great, Georgie.
I'm really proud of you.
446
00:17:19,344 --> 00:17:22,145
It's only temporary
till I find something better.
447
00:17:26,951 --> 00:17:28,318
Listen, Georgie,
448
00:17:28,353 --> 00:17:29,931
Audrey and I were thinking...
449
00:17:29,954 --> 00:17:31,455
I was thinking...
450
00:17:31,490 --> 00:17:34,057
I could really use some help
down at the tire store.
451
00:17:34,092 --> 00:17:36,160
Really? Selling tires?
452
00:17:36,961 --> 00:17:38,328
You are not gonna regret this.
453
00:17:38,363 --> 00:17:39,832
I'll work my butt off for you.
454
00:17:39,865 --> 00:17:40,909
Nights, weekends, holidays...
455
00:17:40,932 --> 00:17:42,299
you name it, I am there.
456
00:17:43,367 --> 00:17:45,369
Pretty impressive kid, huh?
457
00:17:46,371 --> 00:17:47,404
We'll see.
458
00:17:48,272 --> 00:17:49,875
"We'll see"?
459
00:17:49,909 --> 00:17:50,942
Good job.
460
00:17:50,976 --> 00:17:52,309
Told you.
461
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:57,484
♪ I go out walkin' ♪
462
00:17:57,519 --> 00:17:59,653
♪ After midnight ♪
463
00:17:59,688 --> 00:18:02,624
♪ Out in the moonlight ♪
464
00:18:02,656 --> 00:18:05,060
♪ Just like we used to do ♪
465
00:18:05,094 --> 00:18:06,569
♪ I'm always walkin'... ♪
466
00:18:06,594 --> 00:18:07,963
What the hell is...?
467
00:18:07,997 --> 00:18:09,030
Oh, a snake!
468
00:18:09,065 --> 00:18:10,967
Snake! Oh! A snake!
469
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,934
Snake!
470
00:18:13,903 --> 00:18:14,971
Mary?!
471
00:18:15,003 --> 00:18:17,006
Bring a towel!
32784
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