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1
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,313
- Did she find the dog?
2
00:00:14,315 --> 00:00:16,248
- Yeah, I saw her find the dog.
3
00:00:16,250 --> 00:00:19,151
She must have
freaked out, right.
4
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:22,654
- She started running
around screaming and yelling,
5
00:00:22,656 --> 00:00:23,922
freaking out.
6
00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:27,393
And laid down and started
giving the dog mouth to mouth.
7
00:00:27,395 --> 00:00:28,727
- Disgusting.
8
00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:31,630
Who would do such
a thing like that?
9
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:34,133
You must have
really hated that dog.
10
00:00:34,135 --> 00:00:36,402
- No, the dog was great.
I loved that dog.
11
00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:37,803
- You loved the dog?
12
00:00:37,805 --> 00:00:40,439
- Then why did you poison it?
13
00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:45,344
- Cruelty to animals is one of
the lowest things you can do.
14
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:46,645
You're a scumbag.
15
00:00:46,647 --> 00:00:50,516
You asked me for the story,
I'm telling you the story.
16
00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:52,351
- Well I'm sorry I asked.
17
00:00:52,353 --> 00:00:54,520
I hope someone poisons you, Ted.
18
00:00:54,522 --> 00:00:56,588
I really do.
19
00:00:58,691 --> 00:01:00,159
I think about the human race.
20
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:02,795
I think about the
end of the world.
21
00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:06,432
I wonder about it.
22
00:01:06,434 --> 00:01:08,567
Are we worth saving?
23
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:12,137
What kind of person poisons
his ex-girlfriend's dog
24
00:01:12,139 --> 00:01:15,140
to get revenge?
25
00:01:15,142 --> 00:01:17,843
How can you forgive someone
for something like that?
26
00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:21,213
Can you forgive them?
I don't know.
27
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:22,848
It's hard to have faith
in the human race
28
00:01:22,850 --> 00:01:26,351
when there are people
like Ted walking the earth.
29
00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:31,457
You're listening to
Stevie bricks show
30
00:01:31,459 --> 00:01:33,592
and this is Stevie bricks
31
00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,561
and I thank you if you're
tuning in tonight.
32
00:01:35,563 --> 00:01:37,529
It's tell-all Tuesday
33
00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:43,202
and I want to know the worst
thing you've ever done.
34
00:01:43,204 --> 00:01:45,404
Maybe you're a
high school teacher
35
00:01:45,406 --> 00:01:47,573
and you've had sex
with a student.
36
00:01:47,575 --> 00:01:49,608
Maybe you're an ex-Nazi
37
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:52,344
and you worked in a
concentration camp.
38
00:01:52,346 --> 00:01:58,350
Or maybe you worked at
the world bank or tmz.
39
00:01:58,352 --> 00:02:03,355
Whatever it is, this is a chance
for you to tell your story.
40
00:02:03,357 --> 00:02:05,891
Ron from New York,
you're on the air.
41
00:02:05,893 --> 00:02:07,659
What's the worst thing
you've ever done?
42
00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:09,394
- I can't believe I'm
talking to Stevie bricks.
43
00:02:09,396 --> 00:02:11,230
- Man, I love your show.
- Thanks.
44
00:02:11,232 --> 00:02:12,364
- I listen to you
all the time, man.
45
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,233
- All the time.
- Ron, you flatter me.
46
00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:16,802
- What's the worst thing
you've ever done?
47
00:02:16,804 --> 00:02:19,471
- Well, I've never
told anyone this story.
48
00:02:19,473 --> 00:02:22,241
- Okay, well let's hear it.
49
00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:24,643
- It was a long time ago.
It was in college, actually.
50
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,545
- Mm-hmm.
What happened?
51
00:02:26,547 --> 00:02:28,514
Did you take advantage
of someone?
52
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:29,648
- No, like a girl?
53
00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:31,183
I would never do
anything like that.
54
00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:35,754
- Well, what did you do, Ron?
55
00:02:35,756 --> 00:02:38,390
Hmm?
56
00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:41,927
- I'm sorry, man.
I'm just nervous.
57
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:45,364
I've been carrying this story
with me for a long time.
58
00:02:45,366 --> 00:02:47,633
Tonight's the night i
finally share it with the world.
59
00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,635
Here it goes,
60
00:02:49,637 --> 00:02:51,336
the worst thing I've ever done.
61
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:53,805
- I cut off a man's--
- Ron, we got to go.
We're late.
62
00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:56,808
- Who are you talking to?
- It doesn't matter.
63
00:02:56,810 --> 00:02:58,877
- Honey, we got to go.
We're already late.
- It's okay.
64
00:02:58,879 --> 00:03:00,779
- Ron, you there?
65
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:02,748
- Yeah, we are just
dealing with something.
66
00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:04,850
I'm dealing with my wife
actually, so it's fine.
67
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:08,754
- Who is it?
Who are you talking to?
- It doesn't matter.
68
00:03:08,756 --> 00:03:10,222
- I just don't want
to lose the table
69
00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:11,690
because we all have to
sit at the same time.
70
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:14,359
- Okay, it looks like Ron is
in the middle of some sort of
71
00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:15,494
domestic dispute.
72
00:03:15,496 --> 00:03:17,896
- We can't sit down
until all of us are there.
73
00:03:17,898 --> 00:03:21,867
- Ron, this is live radio.
I don't have a second.
74
00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:23,468
- No, no it's fine.
It's all taken care of,
75
00:03:23,470 --> 00:03:25,270
because I'm going to tell
you the story right now.
76
00:03:25,272 --> 00:03:26,538
- I'll give you 30 seconds.
77
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,440
- Uh-huh.
Some other time, Ron.
78
00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:29,741
- Hello?
- 29, 28
79
00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:33,478
- hello?
- 27, 26...
80
00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:34,680
- He hung up.
81
00:03:34,682 --> 00:03:36,315
- Who were you talking to?
82
00:03:36,317 --> 00:03:38,217
- Stevie bricks.
83
00:03:38,219 --> 00:03:40,586
- Stevie bricks, the radio guy?
84
00:03:40,588 --> 00:03:43,989
- Ron, he's totally obnoxious.
Come on, let's go.
85
00:03:43,991 --> 00:03:45,524
- How are you
already ready to go?
86
00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:47,793
You take forever to get ready.
87
00:03:48,861 --> 00:03:50,996
- Are you really
wearing that shirt?
88
00:03:50,998 --> 00:03:52,965
- What's wrong with this shirt?
89
00:03:52,967 --> 00:03:55,367
- You look like a
Mexican Ken doll.
90
00:03:55,369 --> 00:03:59,638
- I'm not a 12-year-old, okay.
I can listen to whatever I want.
91
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:01,406
Besides, I don't give you a
hard time about watching that
92
00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:03,742
prison show you love so much.
93
00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,711
- Yeah,
but why would you call in?
94
00:04:05,713 --> 00:04:07,479
- Can you slow down
a little bit?
95
00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:08,847
- Ron, no.
We're running late.
96
00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:10,616
- You're power walking
it feels like
97
00:04:10,618 --> 00:04:12,918
- and my feet are hurting.
- I'm not power walking.
98
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,686
- Seriously,
just slow down a little bit.
99
00:04:14,688 --> 00:04:16,755
- You know what,
you really need to get in shape.
100
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:17,923
A lot of fat around
the mid-section
101
00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:18,824
is a sign of heart disease.
102
00:04:18,826 --> 00:04:20,959
- I'm fine, okay.
103
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:22,828
- You know what my mom wants
to get you for Christmas?
104
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:25,364
- What?
- A defibrillator.
105
00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:29,368
- Get Pesto,
you can get anything you want.
106
00:04:29,370 --> 00:04:30,902
- We can share something.
107
00:04:30,904 --> 00:04:32,504
- Okay, all right.
108
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:37,743
Isn't my wife the most beautiful
thing you've ever seen?
109
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:39,411
- She really is.
- Really.
110
00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:43,048
- You like to make me blush.
- Gorgeous.
111
00:04:43,050 --> 00:04:44,916
- Nicki, you look
beautiful as well.
112
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:47,619
- Oh, thank you.
113
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,054
- Ron, doesn't Nicki
look beautiful tonight?
114
00:04:49,056 --> 00:04:51,923
I don't need confirmation
that she's looks beautiful.
115
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,959
I know she's beautiful.
You look beautiful too.
116
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:55,927
Everybody here
looks really great.
117
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:58,730
Now can you guys just stop
doing what you're doing
118
00:04:58,732 --> 00:05:02,801
because I don't even want
to eat dinner because...
119
00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,803
- Ron's not one to
give complements much.
120
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:08,573
Actually he doesn't
really say I love you.
121
00:05:08,575 --> 00:05:10,542
- Well, sometimes.
- What's the matter with you?
122
00:05:10,544 --> 00:05:12,978
- I just don't feel like you
have to say it all the time.
123
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:15,714
You know, before you go to bed,
before you go to work,
124
00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:17,516
before you go to the bathroom.
125
00:05:17,518 --> 00:05:19,518
There's something about it
that reeks of desperation.
126
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,486
Constantly, "i love you,
i love you,
127
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:25,957
- I'm not questioning
your love for each other.
- I love you.
128
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,492
- I'm just saying there's
something about it
129
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,695
that's slightly
pathetically sad.
130
00:05:29,697 --> 00:05:31,463
And desperate.
131
00:05:31,465 --> 00:05:33,699
- You should try it.
You should try it, Ron.
132
00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,634
- It feels good.
- Yeah, it just feels good.
133
00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:37,703
I don't have to tell her
she's beautiful
134
00:05:37,705 --> 00:05:39,638
to confirm that I love her.
135
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:43,075
- It's just a reminder that you
can give love and receive love
136
00:05:43,077 --> 00:05:45,711
and it just feels so good
inside when you say it.
137
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:48,747
- We give and receive love
once a month, at least.
138
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:50,816
- It's nice to hear sometimes.
139
00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:51,983
I'm just letting you know that.
140
00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:53,485
I'm fine,
it's nice to hear sometimes.
141
00:05:53,487 --> 00:05:54,753
- Listen to your woman.
142
00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:56,088
- How are we doing
over here, guys?
143
00:05:56,090 --> 00:05:57,556
- Good, good.
- Great!
144
00:05:57,558 --> 00:05:58,924
- Are you ready to order?
- Yeah!
145
00:05:58,926 --> 00:06:00,492
- You got any questions
about the menu?
146
00:06:00,494 --> 00:06:01,827
- Um.
- Um.
147
00:06:01,829 --> 00:06:04,763
- I know what I want,
spaghetti and meatballs.
148
00:06:04,997 --> 00:06:07,599
- I think it was based
on her biography.
149
00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,601
- Yeah, she went to prison
for like a year and a half
150
00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:10,702
for embezzlement or something.
151
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:13,905
- I wonder if she regrets it.
- I can't imagine she would.
152
00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:16,508
She got a biography
and a hit TV show out of it.
153
00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:18,043
It's the best thing
that ever happened to her.
154
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,412
- I don't know if I'd trade
18 months of my life
155
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,948
for a career in
film and television.
156
00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:24,816
- Well, she probably saw
it as an opportunity
157
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:27,853
to capitalize off of a
unique life experience.
158
00:06:27,855 --> 00:06:29,488
- I can't believe we're
sitting around talking about
159
00:06:29,490 --> 00:06:31,123
a television show
about women in prison.
160
00:06:31,125 --> 00:06:32,991
We're all adults, we should
be talking about something
161
00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:36,428
sophisticated, like literature,
or books or something like that.
162
00:06:36,430 --> 00:06:40,599
- This is a worthy conversation.
It's culture.
- Yeah.
163
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:41,967
- But I'm just sick of hearing
164
00:06:41,969 --> 00:06:45,137
that we're in the golden
age of television, okay.
165
00:06:45,139 --> 00:06:46,838
It's still just a
big distraction.
166
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:49,141
It doesn't compare to reading.
167
00:06:49,143 --> 00:06:50,909
- This coming from the
man who listens to
168
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,611
the Stevie bricks show.
169
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,079
- Who listens to Stevie bricks?
- What?
170
00:06:54,081 --> 00:06:55,447
- This fucking guy does.
171
00:06:55,449 --> 00:06:56,615
- No.
172
00:06:56,617 --> 00:06:57,883
- He's the worst.
173
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,618
- You listen to Stevie bricks?
174
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:03,088
- Hey, look at it this way.
If it wasn't for sexist people,
175
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,756
feminism wouldn't have a cause.
176
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:08,627
- Actually, tonight he was
calling into the show.
177
00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:09,728
That's why we were late.
178
00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:11,963
- It's the first time
i called in.
179
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,899
- You're as low-brow
as they get.
180
00:07:13,901 --> 00:07:15,934
- Stevie bricks
is not low-brow, okay.
181
00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,502
He's an anthropologist.
182
00:07:17,504 --> 00:07:20,839
- He has people call in
to break wind on air.
183
00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:22,207
Did you call in to do that?
184
00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:25,577
- I would never air
my air on air.
185
00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:28,713
- Why did you call?
- He doesn't do that
anymore, by the way.
186
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:33,018
- So, why did you call in?
- Yeah, why did you call in?
187
00:07:33,020 --> 00:07:36,188
- All right, once a week
he has this segment
188
00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:38,089
called tell-all Tuesday,
189
00:07:38,091 --> 00:07:41,927
where callers call in
and they tell a story.
190
00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:43,895
They tell the worst thing
they've ever done.
191
00:07:43,897 --> 00:07:47,766
To talk about the worst
thing I've ever done.
192
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:52,604
- Yeah, what's the worst
thing you've ever done?
- I don't want to talk about it.
193
00:07:52,606 --> 00:07:54,906
- You were going to
tell all of New York.
- Yeah.
194
00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:56,575
- The moment is gone though.
195
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,210
- No, no, no,
the moment's not gone.
196
00:07:58,212 --> 00:07:59,611
The moment is now.
197
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:01,947
- Tell us.
Do you know this story?
198
00:08:01,949 --> 00:08:04,449
I mean, he's done some
really shitty things,
199
00:08:04,451 --> 00:08:07,686
so I would love to know
what the worst thing is.
200
00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:09,521
- Tell us.
201
00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:11,156
- I cut a guy's fingers off.
202
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:12,624
- What?
- Bullshit.
203
00:08:12,626 --> 00:08:13,892
- No, it's true. I did.
- Bullshit.
204
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:16,928
- I was at a frat party
in college,
205
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:19,130
partying and drinking.
206
00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:22,968
So, I was waiting in line
to go to the bathroom.
207
00:08:22,970 --> 00:08:24,836
There's a girl standing there,
she's cute
208
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,838
and I start talking to her.
I start flirting.
209
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:30,208
Because I've had a few drinks
and got a lot of bravado.
210
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:32,844
I'm very charming, you know,
when I'm drunk.
211
00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:34,713
So we're talking,
having a good time,
212
00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:35,947
we're laughing.
213
00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:37,883
This is all in the span
of a few minutes.
214
00:08:37,885 --> 00:08:41,286
Then, out of the blue, this big
dude comes out of the bathroom
215
00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:42,854
and he sees me
talking to this girl.
216
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,289
Obviously it's his girlfriend.
217
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:48,727
And he says, "what the fuck are
you doing talking to my girl?"
218
00:08:48,729 --> 00:08:50,862
- It's his girlfriend?
- Apparently,
it's his girlfriend.
219
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,130
- What were you saying to her?
220
00:08:52,132 --> 00:08:53,865
- Nothing, I don't remember.
221
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,767
- People get jealous,
you know...College guys.
222
00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:57,636
- I'm just flirting with her
like people do at parties.
223
00:08:57,638 --> 00:08:59,738
It was a long time ago.
I was drunk and stoned.
224
00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:01,907
I wasn't saying anything
crude or untoward.
225
00:09:01,909 --> 00:09:04,709
He's throttling you
and then what?
226
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:08,079
- He's smacking you
around like a little bitch.
227
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:09,314
- No, he's not slapping me
around like a little bitch,
228
00:09:09,316 --> 00:09:10,682
but he's pushing me
up against the wall
229
00:09:10,684 --> 00:09:11,850
and he's screaming at me.
230
00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:13,885
- He's actually assaulting me.
- Right.
231
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,154
- So, I don't take shit
like that from anybody.
232
00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:18,156
I may be a small guy,
but if people fuck with me,
233
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,859
I'll fuck shit up
if I get provoked.
234
00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:23,194
- Okay, just tell us the story.
- Anyway, Rambo.
235
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:25,263
- So I just react
236
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:29,167
and I just shove the guy
as hard as I can
237
00:09:29,169 --> 00:09:32,237
I wrestled in high school.
I'm a strong motherfucker.
238
00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:33,805
I can get people
off balance, right.
239
00:09:33,807 --> 00:09:36,041
So the guy's on the floor,
and he's writhing around
240
00:09:36,043 --> 00:09:40,045
and he stands up and
he's really pissed off now,
241
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:43,148
- because I've humiliated him
in front of all these people.
- Good, good.
242
00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:45,150
- He deserved it, right?
- Yeah, he deserved it.
243
00:09:45,152 --> 00:09:46,885
- I hate punks like that.
- I do too,
244
00:09:46,887 --> 00:09:51,623
- but, at the same time,
he stands up and he's
really pissed off now.
245
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:54,125
So I'm a little scared,
not because I'm a pussy,
246
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:56,194
but this is seriously
some fucked up shit.
247
00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:57,996
So, he starts coming after me
248
00:09:57,998 --> 00:10:01,800
and he charges me
with his hands out like this
249
00:10:01,802 --> 00:10:04,336
and my fight or flight
response takes hold.
250
00:10:04,338 --> 00:10:07,672
So I just slam the
bathroom door and I run.
251
00:10:07,674 --> 00:10:09,207
I just run like hell.
252
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,644
But the thing is, this
bathroom door is really heavy.
253
00:10:12,646 --> 00:10:14,846
It's like one of these big
industrial bathroom doors,
254
00:10:14,848 --> 00:10:17,182
so when it slams,
and I slam it shut,
255
00:10:17,184 --> 00:10:19,751
it slams really hard.
It's like "wham!"
256
00:10:19,753 --> 00:10:21,820
You know, really, really hard.
257
00:10:21,822 --> 00:10:25,190
And I start running but then
i hear all this screaming
258
00:10:25,192 --> 00:10:26,825
and yelling, like,
"oh my god!"
259
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:29,027
It's complete pandemonium.
260
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:32,831
And I look up and this frat
guy is back on me again
261
00:10:32,833 --> 00:10:34,699
and he's like,
"look what you did to me!
262
00:10:34,701 --> 00:10:36,668
Look what you did to me,
mother fucker!"
263
00:10:36,670 --> 00:10:39,104
- And there's blood everywhere.
- Oh my god.
264
00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:41,806
Again, I'm a little stone
and inebriated.
265
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,074
But I'll never forget this.
266
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:44,976
There's blood all over
my sweater,
267
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,344
blood all over the walls.
268
00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:48,813
He says,
"look what you did to me!"
269
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,115
And I look up
270
00:10:50,117 --> 00:10:52,717
and two of his fingers
are missing.
271
00:10:52,719 --> 00:10:56,187
They're cut off and there's
blood just gushing everywhere.
272
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:58,189
Again, this is a frenzy.
It's out of control.
273
00:10:58,191 --> 00:10:59,858
- It's complete bedlam.
- I can't believe you
didn't tell me this.
274
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:03,128
- The door cut his
fucking fingers off.
- Really?
275
00:11:03,130 --> 00:11:06,297
- Is it a heavy, heavy door?
It could have done that?
276
00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:08,967
- It wasn't like they were
dangling or mangled.
277
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,302
- They were clean cut.
- Off? Off?
278
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,304
- Off.
- And then what happened?
279
00:11:13,306 --> 00:11:15,006
- So everybody's freaking out.
280
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:19,144
The guy's freaking out.
And I just run, I run like hell.
281
00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,413
I run out of the frat house.
I run across campus.
282
00:11:21,415 --> 00:11:25,383
And I pretty much hide in the
dorm room until the next day.
283
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:27,285
- Did you get into trouble?
284
00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:29,788
- They didn't have
cell phones back then
285
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:31,022
so no one took a photo.
286
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:32,390
- No one saw you.
No one fingered you?
287
00:11:32,392 --> 00:11:35,293
- People saw me, but they
didn't know who we were.
288
00:11:35,295 --> 00:11:37,195
We used to go to these frat
parties, my friend and I.
289
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,930
We would bounce
around frat court.
290
00:11:38,932 --> 00:11:41,132
We would go from one
frat party to next frat party,
291
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:43,268
- drinking their beer,
fucking their women.
- Right, sure.
292
00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:48,873
- That's the way you do,
or the way one does.
- You guys...
293
00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:51,109
- Anyway, that's the
worst thing I ever did.
294
00:11:51,111 --> 00:11:54,846
- Did you ever wonder
whatever happened to that guy?
295
00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:57,449
- I wouldn't know that guy
if I saw him today.
296
00:11:57,451 --> 00:11:59,350
- You don't think that's
hanging over your head.
297
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:01,720
The guy's somewhere
standing nearby.
298
00:12:01,722 --> 00:12:04,389
- It could be this guy right
here and I wouldn't even know.
You know?
299
00:12:04,391 --> 00:12:05,924
- How are you guys doing?
300
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:08,460
- Good.
- Good, a little nauseated.
301
00:12:08,462 --> 00:12:10,261
- Anybody want dessert?
302
00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:12,430
- Yes, I'll have the tiramisu.
- No!
303
00:12:12,432 --> 00:12:14,933
- Oh, this is so good.
- Why didn't you guys
just get your own?
304
00:12:14,935 --> 00:12:17,068
- I just wanted a bite.
- We could have gotten extra.
305
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:20,739
- Take your time,
whenever you guys are ready.
- Thank you.
306
00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:21,806
- Thank you.
307
00:12:21,808 --> 00:12:23,208
- No, no we got this.
- Yeah.
308
00:12:23,210 --> 00:12:24,075
- This is our turn.
- Are you sure?
309
00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:25,343
- You guys paid last time.
310
00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:26,511
- Did we?
- Yeah.
311
00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:28,413
- Yeah,
it's definitely our turn.
312
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:30,215
- I mean, this place is more
expensive than the last place,
313
00:12:30,217 --> 00:12:31,750
but that's fine.
314
00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:41,926
- Goodnight, babe.
315
00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:48,833
Oh sweetheart,
I'm really stuffed.
316
00:12:48,835 --> 00:12:51,136
That food was so rich.
317
00:12:55,007 --> 00:12:58,943
- You want to fool
around a little bit?
318
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:02,013
- I'm really tired, honey.
319
00:13:02,015 --> 00:13:04,949
I had a fucking long day.
320
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:06,885
- Fine.
321
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,289
- Hey.
- Yeah.
322
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,390
- I love you.
323
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:14,392
- I love you too.
324
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,070
- Les?
325
00:13:26,072 --> 00:13:27,405
- Huh?
326
00:13:27,407 --> 00:13:30,542
- What's the worst thing
you've ever done?
327
00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:38,516
- I need to tell you something.
- Huh, what?
328
00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:40,285
- I love you.
329
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:43,488
- Huh?
- I love you.
330
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:46,124
- Hey look at me for a second.
- What?
331
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:48,493
- I love you.
- I know.
332
00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:51,296
- No, I mean, I really,
really love you.
333
00:13:51,298 --> 00:13:54,933
You're the most beautiful
women I've ever seen in my life.
334
00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:58,269
If I believed in god,
i would thank him or her,
335
00:13:58,271 --> 00:14:02,907
everyday, that he made you
just stupid enough to marry me.
336
00:14:02,909 --> 00:14:04,175
- Thanks.
337
00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:06,411
- Thank you for
making her so stupid.
338
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,046
I don't know what i
would do without you.
339
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:09,414
- You're very sweet.
340
00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:12,050
- We should make a baby.
341
00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:13,585
- No.
342
00:14:14,286 --> 00:14:15,987
- What the fuck.
343
00:14:15,989 --> 00:14:17,622
- That's the most disgusting
thing I've ever heard
344
00:14:17,624 --> 00:14:18,923
in my entire life.
345
00:14:18,925 --> 00:14:21,159
- You asked me
and I told you.
346
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,428
Why the fuck did you ask me
if you didn't want to hear it.
347
00:14:23,430 --> 00:14:25,430
- You peed on a puppy?
348
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:26,931
An innocent puppy?
349
00:14:26,933 --> 00:14:28,199
- It was in fucking high school.
350
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:29,467
It was ages ago.
351
00:14:29,469 --> 00:14:32,337
You're with your punk ass
high school friends
352
00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:35,073
and you're walking in the woods
and you see a stray puppy,
353
00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:39,010
so you pull out your cocks
and you piss all over it?
354
00:14:39,012 --> 00:14:41,012
- That's what you did?
- I'm not proud of it.
355
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:42,013
- I'm going to be sick.
356
00:14:42,015 --> 00:14:43,414
- Why are you getting so upset?
357
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:45,350
You're acting like we
ripped it open and ate it.
358
00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:47,085
- I just wish you never
would have told me.
359
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:48,553
I can't handle things like this.
360
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:50,288
You know I obsess over things.
361
00:14:50,290 --> 00:14:52,957
- Fine, can we start over now?
362
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:54,392
The worst thing I ever did?
363
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,494
I stole a pair of
running shoes, okay.
364
00:14:56,496 --> 00:15:00,298
- What was it doing when you
were pissing all over it?
365
00:15:02,602 --> 00:15:05,904
It would run one way,
i would spray it with pee.
366
00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:11,142
- I'm going to be sick.
I'm going to be so sick.
367
00:15:11,144 --> 00:15:13,111
- You know, when we first met
and we were experimenting,
368
00:15:13,113 --> 00:15:14,946
we use to give each
other golden showers,
369
00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:15,680
remember that?
370
00:15:15,682 --> 00:15:17,415
- That was consensual.
371
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,050
- Okay, the next time
i pee on a puppy,
372
00:15:19,052 --> 00:15:20,652
I'll get his consent,
all right.
373
00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:22,020
- When I was in college,
374
00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:23,554
I used to be an
animal rights activist.
375
00:15:23,556 --> 00:15:27,358
I use to throw buckets of paint
on people who wore fur coats.
376
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,460
- That's a fantastic way
to solve a problem,
377
00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:31,129
just throw a
bucket of paint on it.
378
00:15:31,131 --> 00:15:32,530
Who thought of that?
It's genius.
379
00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:34,265
- Its better than
a bucket of piss.
380
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:37,268
- Fine, shut the light.
381
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:40,238
- You need to make amends.
382
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,941
- I'll make a donation
to the humane society.
383
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,609
- That could work.
384
00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:49,681
- Like, five thousand dollars.
- Fine.
385
00:15:49,683 --> 00:15:51,449
- That's five thousand less
than we'll have to spend
386
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:53,685
on shit we like.
387
00:15:53,687 --> 00:15:55,954
- Like, five hundred dollars.
- Done.
388
00:15:55,956 --> 00:15:58,056
- Shut the light.
389
00:16:04,563 --> 00:16:07,265
What's the worst thing
you've ever done?
390
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:14,605
Does anybody recognize
what I'm drawing?
391
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:16,274
- Twin towers?
392
00:16:16,276 --> 00:16:17,675
- Twin towers.
That's exactly right.
393
00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:20,979
And we all know what
happened to the twin towers.
394
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:23,181
September 11th 2001,
395
00:16:23,183 --> 00:16:28,553
they were reduced to a big
heap of smoldering rubble, okay.
396
00:16:28,555 --> 00:16:32,323
We went to war with Afghanistan
and we went to war with Iraq
397
00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:37,428
and now Iraq is completely
discombobulated and in pieces.
398
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:42,033
So, what I want to know is,
instead of going to war,
399
00:16:42,035 --> 00:16:45,436
what are some alternatives
to going to war?
400
00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:48,473
What are some things we could
have done besides going to war?
401
00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:51,242
So, Cameron, let's say
that I walk up to you.
402
00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:52,510
You're in the hallway
and I just punch you.
403
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:55,413
I just punch you.
I punch you in the shoulder.
404
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:57,415
Okay, what are you going to do?
405
00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:59,584
- I'm probably going
to punch you back!
406
00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:02,086
- Well, yeah.
That's right, you know.
407
00:17:02,088 --> 00:17:06,224
And I would understand that,
408
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:09,293
and that's exactly the way
we acted after 9/11.
409
00:17:09,295 --> 00:17:12,530
We were all very angry,
we wanted revenge.
410
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:17,035
We were also very scared,
so we reacted with force, okay.
411
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:19,303
But there wasn't a
lot of compassion.
412
00:17:19,305 --> 00:17:24,142
There was compassion for
the people we lost on 9/11.
413
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:26,778
There was compassion
for the families,
414
00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:28,146
but there wasn't so
much compassion
415
00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:29,380
for the people we bombed.
416
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:32,050
Rain, can you put your
cell phone away, please?
417
00:17:32,052 --> 00:17:33,584
So what are some alternatives?
418
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:37,655
What are some things
we could do besides
419
00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:39,690
punch back, basically.
420
00:17:39,692 --> 00:17:41,426
- You could talk.
421
00:17:41,428 --> 00:17:43,461
- That's good, Kimberly.
We could talk.
422
00:17:43,463 --> 00:17:49,667
Someone punches you,
you could ask a question,
423
00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:50,802
for example.
424
00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:53,337
Ask me why I punched you,
Cameron.
425
00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:55,773
I just punched you in the face.
Ask me a question.
426
00:17:55,775 --> 00:17:57,809
Rain.
Come on, man.
427
00:17:57,811 --> 00:18:00,445
Put the cell phone away,
seriously.
428
00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:02,647
You're cramping my
whole style here, okay.
429
00:18:02,649 --> 00:18:05,149
Give it to me.
Give it to me.
430
00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:07,085
- Give it to me.
- No.
431
00:18:07,087 --> 00:18:08,553
- What are you doing?
Why are you doing this?
432
00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:09,854
- This is so stupid.
433
00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:11,422
- Why is this stupid?
434
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:13,424
- Do you realize
what you're saying?
435
00:18:13,426 --> 00:18:15,126
You're saying that the
terrorists were justified
436
00:18:15,128 --> 00:18:16,394
in what they did.
437
00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:18,196
- No, I'm not saying that.
- Yeah, you are.
438
00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:20,331
- I'm trying to get you all
to learn empathy,
439
00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:22,300
which is something
this me generation of me,
440
00:18:22,302 --> 00:18:24,836
- me, me, doesn't have.
- Empathy?
441
00:18:24,838 --> 00:18:26,304
Why should I be
listening to you?
442
00:18:26,306 --> 00:18:29,173
It's adults that start the wars?
443
00:18:30,309 --> 00:18:32,710
- I had to push a lot strings to
get this through the curriculum.
444
00:18:32,712 --> 00:18:34,479
But, I'm glad you guys
are appreciating it.
445
00:18:34,481 --> 00:18:36,614
You guys have a good day,
take care.
446
00:18:43,188 --> 00:18:44,555
Jesus Christ.
447
00:18:44,557 --> 00:18:45,590
Les?
What are you doing, man?
448
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:47,525
- I should fuck you up
right now.
449
00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:52,697
- Kate told me about your little
finger bang party last year.
450
00:18:52,699 --> 00:18:54,298
I didn't think you
were the kind of guy
451
00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:56,667
to fuck around with
another man's wife.
452
00:18:58,604 --> 00:19:00,304
- Is everything okay?
453
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:02,373
- Yeah Zane, it's cool.
454
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:05,443
- Yeah. It's fine.
He's fine, thanks. It's cool.
455
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:06,577
You can go back
to your friends.
456
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:10,181
- This is where I work, man.
Don't do this shit, okay.
457
00:19:10,183 --> 00:19:13,784
We were fucking wasted.
It didn't mean anything.
458
00:19:13,786 --> 00:19:15,820
- Oh, is that an excuse?
Does that make it okay?
459
00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:17,788
You were wasted?
460
00:19:19,459 --> 00:19:23,561
- What's wrong with you?
- I'm contemplating
kicking your ass,
461
00:19:23,563 --> 00:19:26,564
but I don't want
to get in trouble.
462
00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:27,865
You hit somebody in the
temple hard enough
463
00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:29,333
you can kill them instantly.
464
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,335
I don't need a manslaughter
conviction.
465
00:19:31,337 --> 00:19:35,173
- Nobody needs a manslaughter
conviction.
466
00:19:35,175 --> 00:19:36,707
- Why did she tell you?
467
00:19:36,709 --> 00:19:38,176
- I have no idea
why she told me.
468
00:19:38,178 --> 00:19:39,477
I would rather I didn't know.
469
00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:41,345
- It was innocent.
470
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:43,881
You know where I come from
stinky pinky isn't innocent.
471
00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:45,283
It's second base.
472
00:19:45,285 --> 00:19:47,618
- Stinky pinky?
473
00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,253
- Did you fuck her?
474
00:19:49,255 --> 00:19:51,622
- No, man.
We made out in a bathroom.
475
00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:52,823
It was like two years ago.
476
00:19:52,825 --> 00:19:54,325
I barely remember it, man.
477
00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:56,861
I was plastered.
478
00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:00,865
You're not going to
tell Nicki, are you?
479
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,833
- No, but you should.
480
00:20:02,835 --> 00:20:04,202
- I'm not going to.
481
00:20:04,204 --> 00:20:05,536
- Yeah, I'm not surprised.
482
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,371
You always seemed
like a coward to me.
483
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:09,240
- I'm not a coward, man.
I use to live in bedstuy.
484
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:10,808
- You don't see Kate anymore,
you understand.
485
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:13,778
You don't talk to her,
you don't even dream about her.
486
00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:15,580
- I can't control
what I dream about.
487
00:20:15,582 --> 00:20:17,782
I had a dream last night i
was 69-ing Donald rumsfeld.
488
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:20,251
- Listen to me.
I know gangsters, right.
489
00:20:20,253 --> 00:20:21,352
Real ones.
490
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:22,920
Sicilians and shit.
491
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,922
You may have cut a guy's
fingers off by accident
492
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:27,858
but I know people who do that
for a living, okay?
493
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:30,995
You just watch your back,
motherfucker.
494
00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:33,731
- I wash my back every night.
495
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:35,233
- Watch!
496
00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:37,868
Watch, motherfucker!
497
00:20:40,939 --> 00:20:43,407
- Fuck.
498
00:20:45,777 --> 00:20:49,280
- Now, my first marriage
was a disaster.
499
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:53,884
My second marriage
was not much better.
500
00:20:53,886 --> 00:20:57,989
My third was okay...
501
00:20:58,590 --> 00:20:59,957
...but far from perfect.
502
00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:05,696
I'm not a Saint, I'll admit it,
but we all have needs.
503
00:21:05,698 --> 00:21:08,532
- Hey.
- Hey.
504
00:21:08,534 --> 00:21:09,867
- ...food and shelter...
505
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:11,636
- You're listening
to Stevie bricks.
- Yeah.
506
00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:16,741
- I'm just trying to figure out
what you see in this guy.
507
00:21:16,743 --> 00:21:18,342
- What are they talking about?
508
00:21:18,344 --> 00:21:21,012
- Adultery.
509
00:21:21,014 --> 00:21:22,513
- Did you talk to les?
510
00:21:22,515 --> 00:21:23,581
- Huh? No.
511
00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:25,549
- Turn this off.
This guy's an idiot.
512
00:21:25,551 --> 00:21:26,651
- Oh, now he's an idiot?
513
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:27,752
I thought you
worshipped the guy.
514
00:21:27,754 --> 00:21:29,854
- You hungry?
- I guess.
515
00:21:29,856 --> 00:21:31,322
- Let's get some Chinese food.
516
00:21:31,324 --> 00:21:32,757
- Okay.
517
00:21:40,399 --> 00:21:42,333
- Les.
518
00:21:42,335 --> 00:21:43,934
- Yes.
519
00:21:43,936 --> 00:21:46,871
- Are you going to talk to me?
520
00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:48,739
- I'm eating.
521
00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:50,908
- So?
522
00:21:51,443 --> 00:21:54,478
- I don't like talking
with my mouth full.
523
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:57,448
- Well, talk to me when
your mouth is empty.
524
00:22:03,488 --> 00:22:06,090
- I don't feel like
talking tonight.
525
00:22:07,426 --> 00:22:09,460
- Les, I'm sorry.
526
00:22:09,462 --> 00:22:11,729
- What are you sorry about?
527
00:22:11,731 --> 00:22:14,098
It was just a finger, right?
528
00:22:14,100 --> 00:22:16,834
Just one finger.
529
00:22:17,803 --> 00:22:19,970
What's the big deal?
530
00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:23,007
- Felix, how are you?
- Hey, hood to see you.
531
00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:25,376
- Good to see you too.
How are things?
532
00:22:25,378 --> 00:22:27,011
- Good, everything's fine.
- How's your family?
533
00:22:27,013 --> 00:22:28,779
- Family's good, too.
- Good?
534
00:22:28,781 --> 00:22:30,548
- There you go, keep the change.
- Thank you.
535
00:22:30,550 --> 00:22:31,716
- Keep the change.
- Oh, thank you.
536
00:22:31,718 --> 00:22:34,752
- Business is better than ever.
- Better than ever?
537
00:22:34,754 --> 00:22:36,587
- In this economy,
the way this economy is,
538
00:22:36,589 --> 00:22:40,358
- nothing's...
You know, that's great.
- Yeah, nothing is affecting us.
539
00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:41,792
- That's what happens when
you sell a good product
540
00:22:41,794 --> 00:22:43,894
- at a good price.
- Oh, thank you.
541
00:22:43,896 --> 00:22:45,096
- That's probably the reason why
542
00:22:45,098 --> 00:22:46,997
- no one goes to
the movies anymore.
- Right, right!
543
00:22:46,999 --> 00:22:48,666
- Well, thanks very much.
- Thank you so much.
544
00:22:48,668 --> 00:22:50,501
- You're a good customer.
- Thanks very much.
545
00:22:50,503 --> 00:22:52,002
- Take care.
546
00:22:53,773 --> 00:22:56,807
- You really want to
watch "life in orange?"
547
00:22:56,809 --> 00:22:59,543
- Yeah, I want to find out
what the masses are watching.
548
00:22:59,545 --> 00:23:02,913
- Wow, join the herd.
You make it sound so dumb.
549
00:23:02,915 --> 00:23:04,949
- Well, this is the
new normalcy...
550
00:23:04,951 --> 00:23:07,418
The new normality I should say.
551
00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:09,787
Each episode is tuning us out
just a little bit more.
552
00:23:09,789 --> 00:23:12,056
It's what aldous huxley
talked about in brave new world.
553
00:23:12,058 --> 00:23:14,959
- It's also what
Neil postman wrote about.
554
00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:16,727
- I don't know who that is.
555
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,095
- It doesn't matter if
we're getting dumber,
556
00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:20,030
because the singularity
will fix everything.
557
00:23:20,032 --> 00:23:23,067
- Ron, I don't care.
I just want to watch the show.
- Okay.
558
00:23:25,103 --> 00:23:27,905
Is there full frontal in this?
559
00:23:34,679 --> 00:23:37,481
- Les, you're going to be late.
560
00:23:40,185 --> 00:23:43,487
Can I make you breakfast?
561
00:23:57,703 --> 00:24:00,805
- Okay, so operation ajax!
562
00:24:00,807 --> 00:24:02,873
- Isn't that a soap?
563
00:24:02,875 --> 00:24:05,042
- Yeah well, it is a soap, yes.
564
00:24:05,044 --> 00:24:06,744
But in terms of
what happened here,
565
00:24:06,746 --> 00:24:08,512
I wouldn't say there
was anything clean
566
00:24:08,514 --> 00:24:10,614
about what America did, okay.
567
00:24:10,616 --> 00:24:12,716
But if you consider
what we did,
568
00:24:12,718 --> 00:24:14,618
which was pretty lousy,
569
00:24:14,620 --> 00:24:17,154
let's imagine a hypothetical
where it didn't happen.
570
00:24:17,156 --> 00:24:19,857
And we didn't go in and get rid
of the prime minister of Iran
571
00:24:19,859 --> 00:24:21,058
in the 1950s.
572
00:24:21,060 --> 00:24:22,560
How might that have
that affected
573
00:24:22,562 --> 00:24:24,028
middle eastern relations today?
574
00:24:24,030 --> 00:24:26,030
How might the middle east
view us today,
575
00:24:26,032 --> 00:24:29,667
- well, it was in our best
interest to do it though,
576
00:24:29,669 --> 00:24:30,768
wasn't it?
577
00:24:30,770 --> 00:24:35,039
Economically, it was in our
best interest to take their oil.
578
00:24:35,041 --> 00:24:37,141
All Iran wanted to do
was nationalize their oil,
579
00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,642
so what was in
their best interest?
580
00:24:38,644 --> 00:24:40,110
That's what people
don't talk about.
581
00:24:40,112 --> 00:24:43,047
Let's say you got a million
dollars under your bed, okay.
582
00:24:43,049 --> 00:24:44,949
It's in my best interest
583
00:24:44,951 --> 00:24:47,618
to take that million dollars
if I want it,
584
00:24:47,620 --> 00:24:48,953
because I can do a
lot with that money.
585
00:24:48,955 --> 00:24:50,521
But it's not in
your best interest.
586
00:24:50,523 --> 00:24:52,857
Rain, come on, man.
Put the cell phone away.
587
00:24:52,859 --> 00:24:54,625
I'm tired of dealing with this,
every time we're talking.
588
00:24:54,627 --> 00:24:57,228
- Yo, this shit doesn't matter.
589
00:24:57,230 --> 00:25:00,898
All of this matters.
Empathy matters, okay.
590
00:25:00,900 --> 00:25:03,267
- Give me the cell phone!
- Yo, fuck you, Mr. Wells.
591
00:25:03,269 --> 00:25:05,803
- Ooh.
592
00:25:26,958 --> 00:25:29,159
- Nicki.
593
00:25:49,681 --> 00:25:51,015
That's nice.
594
00:25:52,952 --> 00:25:54,919
♪
595
00:26:07,566 --> 00:26:10,834
- Chastity stock is up
4 dollars.
596
00:26:10,836 --> 00:26:12,736
- I told you, right?
597
00:26:12,738 --> 00:26:15,039
I haven't steered you wrong yet.
598
00:26:15,041 --> 00:26:16,574
- I wonder how high
it's going to go
599
00:26:16,576 --> 00:26:19,143
when that first consumer
rocket goes into orbit.
600
00:26:19,145 --> 00:26:21,312
- It's going to go right up
into the stratosphere.
601
00:26:21,314 --> 00:26:23,147
- Let's hope so!
602
00:26:24,884 --> 00:26:27,618
- Sorry, Barry.
Let me take this call.
603
00:26:27,620 --> 00:26:30,120
This guy's not going to
leave me alone otherwise.
604
00:26:31,122 --> 00:26:33,991
Fuck face, I told
you not to contact me.
605
00:26:33,993 --> 00:26:35,593
- You're a sick
son-of-a-bitch, les.
606
00:26:35,595 --> 00:26:37,361
- Oh, I'm a sick son-of-a-bitch?
How so?
607
00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:39,630
- Don't play dumb.
You know what I'm talking about.
608
00:26:39,632 --> 00:26:41,098
- I'm with a client, Ron.
609
00:26:41,100 --> 00:26:43,200
- I thought it was fake at
first, but it's fucking real.
610
00:26:43,202 --> 00:26:45,269
- What's real?
What are you talking about?
611
00:26:45,271 --> 00:26:46,737
- The finger, les.
612
00:26:46,739 --> 00:26:48,305
Give me a break.
The finger, man!
613
00:26:48,307 --> 00:26:49,873
- The finger?
Which one?
614
00:26:49,875 --> 00:26:52,977
- Where did you get it?
One of your mafia connections?
615
00:26:52,979 --> 00:26:58,916
- You told me you had ties
to the sicilian mafia family.
616
00:26:58,918 --> 00:27:00,284
- What?
You think because I'm Italian
617
00:27:00,286 --> 00:27:02,920
that I'm connected to the mob?
What the fuck is that?
618
00:27:02,922 --> 00:27:05,055
- You said so yourself.
619
00:27:05,057 --> 00:27:07,291
- I was just trying to
scare you, you imbecile.
620
00:27:07,293 --> 00:27:09,360
- Well, I don't scare
so easily, les.
621
00:27:09,362 --> 00:27:12,162
I once watched "the exorcist,"
by myself,
622
00:27:12,164 --> 00:27:13,964
in the dark,
all the way through.
623
00:27:13,966 --> 00:27:16,200
I have no idea what
you're talking about so,
624
00:27:16,202 --> 00:27:18,202
- you're lucky i
don't go to the police.
625
00:27:18,204 --> 00:27:19,703
- Go to the police, Ron.
626
00:27:19,705 --> 00:27:20,938
Whatever it is
you're talking about...
627
00:27:20,940 --> 00:27:22,706
- I don't need the police, okay?
628
00:27:22,708 --> 00:27:24,308
Let me tell you something,
you might be Italian,
629
00:27:24,310 --> 00:27:27,878
but I'm turkish and turkish
people are fucking crazy.
630
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:30,147
So watch your fucking back.
631
00:27:30,149 --> 00:27:31,315
- Fuck you.
632
00:27:31,317 --> 00:27:33,117
- Hello?
633
00:27:33,818 --> 00:27:36,854
Mother fuck.
634
00:27:42,261 --> 00:27:44,228
♪
635
00:27:46,698 --> 00:27:48,198
- Who is that?
636
00:27:48,733 --> 00:27:50,434
Hello?
637
00:27:53,838 --> 00:27:55,739
Who is that?
638
00:27:56,241 --> 00:27:57,708
- Honey?
639
00:27:57,710 --> 00:27:59,143
- Ron?
- Hey. You home?
640
00:27:59,145 --> 00:28:02,913
- Oh, my god.
What are you doing?
641
00:28:02,915 --> 00:28:05,049
- Hey babe.
- What is going on in here?
642
00:28:05,051 --> 00:28:06,383
- I thought there was a robber.
643
00:28:06,385 --> 00:28:10,020
- I've got this little
thyroid thing in my thigh.
644
00:28:10,022 --> 00:28:12,356
I was trying to get it out.
645
00:28:12,358 --> 00:28:14,925
My leg was clotting
or something.
646
00:28:14,927 --> 00:28:18,729
- Ron, you need to get
this under control.
647
00:28:18,731 --> 00:28:20,230
You need to see the
trainer I'm working with.
648
00:28:20,232 --> 00:28:22,299
He said he's going to
give you two free sessions.
649
00:28:22,301 --> 00:28:24,201
- I know but you
married me for my...
650
00:28:24,203 --> 00:28:27,004
- No, I married you because
you were a hot wrestler.
651
00:28:27,006 --> 00:28:28,138
- I can still do it, you know.
652
00:28:28,140 --> 00:28:29,707
Come on.
Can you go like that?
653
00:28:29,709 --> 00:28:32,076
I'll fucking barnyard
you right now.
654
00:28:32,078 --> 00:28:34,344
Barnyard you.
Do you want me to?
655
00:28:53,865 --> 00:28:55,833
- What?
656
00:28:55,835 --> 00:28:58,302
I was out with a client.
657
00:28:58,304 --> 00:29:01,405
- You're avoiding me, les.
658
00:29:02,774 --> 00:29:04,408
- What do you want me to say?
659
00:29:04,410 --> 00:29:06,376
- Just talk to me.
660
00:29:06,378 --> 00:29:10,114
It's like we're strangers
all of the sudden.
661
00:29:10,116 --> 00:29:14,051
- All I want to say
are hurtful things, Kate.
662
00:29:15,220 --> 00:29:17,121
I just keep seeing your
hands on his cock
663
00:29:17,123 --> 00:29:19,423
and his fingers inside of you.
664
00:29:19,425 --> 00:29:21,024
- My hand was never
on his cock.
665
00:29:21,026 --> 00:29:24,194
- Yeah, well that's
what I keep seeing.
666
00:29:24,196 --> 00:29:26,930
I keep seeing his tongue
in your mouth
667
00:29:26,932 --> 00:29:29,900
and his hands all over you.
668
00:29:30,268 --> 00:29:32,369
- I'm sorry.
669
00:29:32,371 --> 00:29:34,872
- Yeah, you keep saying that.
670
00:29:52,390 --> 00:29:55,092
- Let's go.
Come on.
671
00:29:55,094 --> 00:29:58,028
Gioia, come on!
We need to go!
672
00:29:58,363 --> 00:29:59,963
- Maybe you're doing
something to provoke her.
673
00:29:59,965 --> 00:30:01,465
You know she can
be very sensitive.
674
00:30:01,467 --> 00:30:03,167
- I'm just doing my job, okay.
675
00:30:03,169 --> 00:30:05,969
Rain's behavior is
becoming more anti-social.
676
00:30:05,971 --> 00:30:08,138
It's interfering with class.
677
00:30:08,140 --> 00:30:09,940
- Mrs. Bennet, is anything
happening at home
678
00:30:09,942 --> 00:30:12,309
that might be
causing rain distress?
679
00:30:12,311 --> 00:30:14,144
- Well, her grandfather
is very sick
680
00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:18,515
- oh, that's sad to hear.
- Diabetes is a serious illness.
681
00:30:18,517 --> 00:30:20,184
They had to amputate one
of his legs below the knee.
682
00:30:20,186 --> 00:30:22,085
They may have to
amputate the other leg soon.
683
00:30:22,087 --> 00:30:24,121
- I'm sorry to hear that.
- Yeah, that's awful.
684
00:30:24,123 --> 00:30:26,156
- But this doesn't give
cause for her to act out
685
00:30:26,158 --> 00:30:27,558
the way you say
that she is.
686
00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:30,260
Normally, she's very
respectful towards authority.
687
00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:32,996
- Yeah, but she's
extremely hostile to me.
688
00:30:32,998 --> 00:30:34,998
- Maybe she's defending herself.
689
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,533
- No.
She's antagonistic.
690
00:30:36,535 --> 00:30:37,534
She's aggressive.
691
00:30:37,536 --> 00:30:39,002
It's completely unprovoked.
692
00:30:39,004 --> 00:30:40,437
- Well, her father was
from the middle east
693
00:30:40,439 --> 00:30:42,339
and her father was
very emotionally abusive.
694
00:30:42,341 --> 00:30:43,607
- So, he's no longer
in the picture?
695
00:30:43,609 --> 00:30:45,576
- No. He sells shish kabobs
in sabzevar.
696
00:30:45,578 --> 00:30:47,077
- Just because he was
emotionally abusive,
697
00:30:47,079 --> 00:30:48,245
doesn't mean that all
middle eastern men
698
00:30:48,247 --> 00:30:51,448
- just because all middle
eastern men aren't abusive
699
00:30:51,450 --> 00:30:53,984
doesn't mean that you're not.
700
00:30:53,986 --> 00:30:56,920
- You can't blame everything
on the middle east.
701
00:30:56,922 --> 00:31:00,023
- I agree with Ron.
And besides, Ron's American.
702
00:31:00,025 --> 00:31:02,159
- Yeah, but my family
is from Turkey.
703
00:31:02,161 --> 00:31:03,994
- And they have very
backwards policies
704
00:31:03,996 --> 00:31:05,596
towards their women there.
705
00:31:05,598 --> 00:31:09,433
Turkey has a very western
attitude towards women.
706
00:31:09,435 --> 00:31:12,903
They expect for their
women to be obsequious there.
707
00:31:12,905 --> 00:31:14,471
- Turkish women, obsequious?
- Yeah.
708
00:31:14,473 --> 00:31:18,442
- No. If anything turkish
women are bossy and bitchy.
709
00:31:18,444 --> 00:31:20,310
- Bossy and bitchy?
710
00:31:20,312 --> 00:31:21,578
- I don't mean it like that.
711
00:31:21,580 --> 00:31:23,213
- Do you see what I mean?
712
00:31:23,215 --> 00:31:24,381
- Strong.
Turkish women are very strong.
713
00:31:24,383 --> 00:31:25,649
- No, you're trying
to cover it up.
714
00:31:25,651 --> 00:31:26,917
- I'm mainly referring
to my mother.
715
00:31:26,919 --> 00:31:28,318
My mother was bossy
and bitchy.
716
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,387
- She still is.
- Ron, Ron, Ron, chill.
717
00:31:30,389 --> 00:31:31,989
- I can't be in the room
with this man.
718
00:31:31,991 --> 00:31:33,190
- Mrs. Bennet,
Mrs. Bennet, listen.
719
00:31:33,192 --> 00:31:36,026
We care greatly
about rain's education.
720
00:31:36,028 --> 00:31:37,327
We feel she's a
very bright girl.
721
00:31:37,329 --> 00:31:39,029
- She's absolutely
a bright girl.
722
00:31:39,031 --> 00:31:40,130
I don't like him.
723
00:31:40,132 --> 00:31:44,401
I don't like him either,
but that's another story.
724
00:31:44,403 --> 00:31:46,503
So how long has rain's
father been out of the picture?
725
00:31:46,505 --> 00:31:49,539
- I became a teacher so
i could make a difference,
726
00:31:49,541 --> 00:31:52,442
to feel good about my life.
727
00:31:52,444 --> 00:31:54,912
But I just feel like I'm
not reaching these kids.
728
00:31:54,914 --> 00:31:57,547
I think it's the parents
to blame to be honest.
729
00:31:57,549 --> 00:32:01,985
I mean, I really just think
that my students hate me.
730
00:32:01,987 --> 00:32:04,187
- I hated all my teachers
in high school.
731
00:32:04,189 --> 00:32:05,355
- You did?
- Yeah.
732
00:32:05,357 --> 00:32:06,556
- Even the ones you fucked?
733
00:32:06,558 --> 00:32:08,659
- Especially the ones I fucked.
- Really?
734
00:32:08,661 --> 00:32:10,427
- Yeah.
- Did you fuck a lot of them?
735
00:32:10,429 --> 00:32:16,333
- Oh yeah, actually, this shirt.
But can you wash it on cold?
736
00:32:16,335 --> 00:32:18,135
Just wash all of it on cold.
737
00:32:18,137 --> 00:32:20,270
- Wash it on hot.
Got it. I got it.
738
00:32:20,272 --> 00:32:22,205
You need anything else?
739
00:32:22,207 --> 00:32:23,507
- Um... I don't think so.
740
00:32:23,509 --> 00:32:25,342
- Anything dirty?
Your panties?
741
00:32:25,344 --> 00:32:27,611
Are they a little crusty?
Are they a little dirty?
742
00:32:27,613 --> 00:32:32,215
Can I take your panties and
give those a nice washing?
743
00:32:32,217 --> 00:32:34,184
- You want my dirty panties?
- I like your dirty panties.
744
00:32:34,186 --> 00:32:36,353
I like your nice,
crusty panties.
745
00:32:36,355 --> 00:32:37,955
That's the best
thing in the world.
746
00:32:37,957 --> 00:32:40,557
There's nothing like
a nice pile of yeast
747
00:32:40,559 --> 00:32:42,092
to get me through the day.
748
00:32:42,094 --> 00:32:43,694
- You're disgusting.
749
00:32:45,230 --> 00:32:48,065
- This would stop a war,
you know what I mean.
750
00:32:48,067 --> 00:32:49,633
Instead of napalm, they
should've just shower
751
00:32:49,635 --> 00:32:51,034
other countries
with your...
752
00:32:51,036 --> 00:32:52,369
Do you want to fool
around before I go?
753
00:32:52,371 --> 00:32:54,004
- No.
754
00:32:54,006 --> 00:32:55,238
- Are you having an outbreak?
755
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,441
- No.
756
00:32:57,443 --> 00:33:00,277
- It's nothing to be
embarrassed about or ashamed of.
757
00:33:00,279 --> 00:33:02,612
- Whatever.
You gave it to me.
758
00:33:02,614 --> 00:33:06,049
- I do know that 100 percent.
I know that 100,000 percent.
759
00:33:06,051 --> 00:33:07,351
- You were promiscuous
in college.
760
00:33:07,353 --> 00:33:09,653
You didn't always
use protection.
761
00:33:09,655 --> 00:33:12,122
- It was awesome in college.
762
00:33:12,124 --> 00:33:13,590
- See you later.
I love you.
763
00:33:13,592 --> 00:33:16,226
- You've been saying
that a lot lately.
764
00:33:16,228 --> 00:33:18,729
- I love you?
I've just been feeling amorous.
765
00:33:18,731 --> 00:33:20,397
You know?
So what?
766
00:33:20,399 --> 00:33:24,401
It's like you're compensating
for something.
767
00:33:24,403 --> 00:33:27,004
- You're crazy.
I love you, okay?
768
00:33:27,006 --> 00:33:28,438
You're my wife and i
want the world to know it.
769
00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:30,707
I'll shout it from the streets
when I get downtown.
770
00:33:30,709 --> 00:33:32,609
That's what I'm going to do.
771
00:33:58,369 --> 00:33:59,803
- Hey.
772
00:33:59,805 --> 00:34:03,040
I'm making your
mother's Italian wedding soup.
773
00:34:03,042 --> 00:34:04,174
- I'm going out.
774
00:34:04,176 --> 00:34:08,545
- I've got to go do something.
- What do you have to do?
775
00:34:08,547 --> 00:34:10,247
- Who you got to do it with?
776
00:34:10,249 --> 00:34:12,716
- I've just got to meet someone.
- Okay, where are you going?
777
00:34:12,718 --> 00:34:14,518
- I've got to do something.
- I made your favorite soup.
778
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:17,454
- It's going to be done
in twenty minutes.
779
00:34:17,456 --> 00:34:20,090
- I can't stay.
- You need to stay.
780
00:34:20,092 --> 00:34:26,763
- You cannot let one finger
ruin an entire life.
781
00:34:26,765 --> 00:34:29,266
It's one little thing.
782
00:34:29,268 --> 00:34:31,468
- I have to leave.
I'll be back later.
783
00:34:31,470 --> 00:34:32,736
- Fine.
- What are you doing?
784
00:34:32,738 --> 00:34:34,237
- I'm just going to...
- What are you doing?
785
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:35,539
- Why did we get married?
786
00:34:35,541 --> 00:34:38,408
I just want to remind
you of what happened
787
00:34:38,410 --> 00:34:40,043
- that brought us together.
- What are you doing?
788
00:34:40,045 --> 00:34:42,546
- I just want you to know
what you'll be missing.
- I don't want to fuck you.
789
00:34:42,548 --> 00:34:45,816
I'm going to blow you.
You're not going to fuck me.
790
00:34:45,818 --> 00:34:47,451
- You don't have to do anything.
- I jerked off in the shower.
791
00:34:47,453 --> 00:34:50,287
- Fine. Just stand there
and I'll make you...
792
00:34:50,289 --> 00:34:52,589
Just come on.
Fuck me up the ass.
793
00:34:52,591 --> 00:34:56,560
You've always wanted to fuck me
up the ass and I never let you.
794
00:34:56,562 --> 00:34:58,829
- Get some self respect.
795
00:34:58,831 --> 00:35:00,831
- Are you fucking kidding me?
796
00:35:00,833 --> 00:35:03,200
Are you fucking walking out
on me right now?
797
00:35:09,508 --> 00:35:11,641
♪
798
00:35:59,724 --> 00:36:01,825
- Can we just stop
fighting please?
799
00:36:01,827 --> 00:36:03,927
Okay, I can't take
the drama anymore.
800
00:36:03,929 --> 00:36:05,595
It's too much.
801
00:36:05,597 --> 00:36:07,297
You used to be nice to me.
802
00:36:07,299 --> 00:36:08,698
- I know.
803
00:36:08,700 --> 00:36:11,601
Prison's hard on a bitch.
804
00:36:11,603 --> 00:36:14,237
- We've got to stick together.
805
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:15,572
I don't have any friends left.
806
00:36:19,277 --> 00:36:20,911
- Hello.
807
00:36:49,674 --> 00:36:51,241
- How's it going?
- Hey man.
808
00:36:51,243 --> 00:36:52,842
- Good to see you again.
- Good to see you too.
809
00:36:52,844 --> 00:36:55,545
All right. Let me see which
one I haven't tried, here.
810
00:36:55,547 --> 00:36:56,680
What are these?
811
00:36:56,682 --> 00:36:57,781
- Uh, those are red velvet.
812
00:36:57,783 --> 00:37:01,218
Let me try one of those
and a decaf coffee, please.
813
00:37:01,220 --> 00:37:02,752
- Sounds good.
814
00:37:02,754 --> 00:37:04,588
I better get one for my
wife too, don't you think?
815
00:37:04,590 --> 00:37:07,490
- Yeah, you better.
- Let me get a red velvet to go.
816
00:37:07,492 --> 00:37:08,458
- She'll like that.
- All right, all right.
817
00:37:08,460 --> 00:37:09,759
- She'll think that's nice.
818
00:37:09,761 --> 00:37:11,628
- That'll be $7.25.
819
00:37:11,630 --> 00:37:12,829
- $7.25?
820
00:37:12,831 --> 00:37:15,298
Easy! Easy!
821
00:37:15,300 --> 00:37:17,367
- Easy! Easy!
- You know that movie?
822
00:37:17,369 --> 00:37:19,669
- I do.
- Great movie.
823
00:37:23,242 --> 00:37:25,308
♪
824
00:38:11,956 --> 00:38:13,957
- What the fuck?
825
00:38:13,959 --> 00:38:16,493
What the fuck?
826
00:38:22,034 --> 00:38:25,568
- Did you see any suspicious
people in the laundromat
827
00:38:25,570 --> 00:38:26,736
while you were doing
your laundry?
828
00:38:26,738 --> 00:38:28,371
- Officer.
This is a Brooklyn laundromat.
829
00:38:28,373 --> 00:38:30,707
Everyone in here looks
like they're on parole.
830
00:38:30,709 --> 00:38:33,310
- Did you check the dryer
before you put your clothes in?
831
00:38:33,312 --> 00:38:34,611
- What do you mean?
832
00:38:34,613 --> 00:38:35,779
- Was it empty?
833
00:38:35,781 --> 00:38:37,514
Perhaps the foot was
left by the person
834
00:38:37,516 --> 00:38:39,015
who dried his
clothes before you.
835
00:38:39,017 --> 00:38:40,817
- Yeah, I'm sure
that's what happened.
836
00:38:40,819 --> 00:38:42,452
Some people leave
behind spare socks.
837
00:38:42,454 --> 00:38:43,920
Some people leave
behind severed feet.
838
00:38:43,922 --> 00:38:44,921
Mystery solved.
839
00:38:44,923 --> 00:38:46,556
- Are you being sarcastic?
840
00:38:46,558 --> 00:38:48,591
- No.
Not at all.
841
00:38:48,593 --> 00:38:51,728
There's a lot of other people
out there with bigger problems.
842
00:38:51,730 --> 00:38:53,430
- Yeah, but most of the
people out there complaining,
843
00:38:53,432 --> 00:38:54,764
their problems that
aren't that big of a deal.
844
00:38:54,766 --> 00:38:56,333
- It's the American way.
- Oh yeah?
845
00:38:56,335 --> 00:38:59,469
- Whoa! Mother fucker.
Goddammit!
846
00:38:59,471 --> 00:39:02,072
- If I had to guess,
I'd say it belongs to a male.
847
00:39:02,074 --> 00:39:04,841
Approximately 5' 10" in height.
848
00:39:04,843 --> 00:39:06,443
- Will you put that away,
please?
849
00:39:06,445 --> 00:39:08,078
- Jesus Christ.
- Relax, sir. It's just a foot.
850
00:39:08,080 --> 00:39:09,913
- No, man,
I'm freaking out over here.
851
00:39:09,915 --> 00:39:12,816
- Just put it in the bag.
Put it in the bag, okay.
852
00:39:12,818 --> 00:39:15,485
Hey, buddy. Relax.
It's going to be all right.
853
00:39:15,487 --> 00:39:16,986
You've just had a
traumatic experience.
854
00:39:16,988 --> 00:39:19,022
- No, man, feet just give
me the creeps in general.
855
00:39:19,024 --> 00:39:21,458
I can't even look at my
wife's feet and they're lovely.
856
00:39:21,460 --> 00:39:23,093
- Well, consider yourself lucky.
857
00:39:23,095 --> 00:39:25,895
My wife's feet
are pretty horrific.
858
00:39:25,897 --> 00:39:27,897
- How is Janet?
859
00:39:27,899 --> 00:39:30,567
We got our 20th anniversary
coming up.
860
00:39:30,569 --> 00:39:32,435
- Oh, that's great.
861
00:39:32,437 --> 00:39:34,371
- Yeah. We're going to get out
of the city for a day or two.
862
00:39:34,373 --> 00:39:35,638
- Where are you going to go?
863
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:36,740
- Jersey.
864
00:39:38,143 --> 00:39:40,377
♪
865
00:39:52,089 --> 00:39:53,590
- Sorry, I'm late.
866
00:39:53,592 --> 00:39:56,459
You're not going to believe
what happened to me.
867
00:39:59,029 --> 00:39:59,929
Oh.
868
00:39:59,931 --> 00:40:01,398
- I want you to leave.
869
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:03,466
- Over a kiss?
870
00:40:03,468 --> 00:40:05,602
- You don't throw someone out
of the apartment over a kiss?
871
00:40:05,604 --> 00:40:08,938
- Ron, you touched
her tinkerbell.
872
00:40:08,940 --> 00:40:10,540
- Tinkerbell?
873
00:40:10,542 --> 00:40:12,842
- Her pussy, Ron.
You touched her pussy.
874
00:40:12,844 --> 00:40:14,144
- Maybe I should leave.
875
00:40:14,146 --> 00:40:17,714
- I had to.
My marriage is falling apart.
876
00:40:17,716 --> 00:40:19,082
- So you're trying to
break up our marriage now?
877
00:40:19,084 --> 00:40:21,084
- No, I just thought
she needed to know.
878
00:40:21,086 --> 00:40:22,819
- Why did you tell les?
879
00:40:22,821 --> 00:40:24,854
- I'd been carrying it too long.
880
00:40:24,856 --> 00:40:26,856
You're not supposed to
hold on to things like that.
881
00:40:26,858 --> 00:40:28,425
It'll cause cancer.
882
00:40:28,427 --> 00:40:29,692
- Everything causes cancer.
883
00:40:29,694 --> 00:40:31,628
- Why did either of you do this?
884
00:40:31,630 --> 00:40:33,129
Why?
Are you attracted to each other?
885
00:40:33,131 --> 00:40:34,130
- No!
- No!
886
00:40:34,132 --> 00:40:36,966
- I don't like fat guys.
- Fuck you.
887
00:40:36,968 --> 00:40:38,635
- I'm leaving.
- Sit down.
888
00:40:38,637 --> 00:40:41,104
- You leave, Ron.
And you are fat.
889
00:40:41,106 --> 00:40:43,173
- I'm the bad guy here, right?
I'm the fucking asshole!
890
00:40:43,175 --> 00:40:44,340
- Yeah, you are an asshole.
- I'm the dick?
891
00:40:44,342 --> 00:40:47,043
- Do you want to know
what her psychopath
of a husband did tonight?
892
00:40:47,045 --> 00:40:48,912
Do you want to know?
Listen to this shit.
893
00:40:48,914 --> 00:40:50,480
He followed me to the laundromat
894
00:40:50,482 --> 00:40:52,148
and he put a severed
foot in the dryer
895
00:40:52,150 --> 00:40:53,716
when I was out
getting cupcakes.
896
00:40:53,718 --> 00:40:55,452
- What the hell are
you talking about?
897
00:40:55,454 --> 00:40:57,086
- Les sent me a severed finger
898
00:40:57,088 --> 00:40:59,722
and he put a fucking
severed foot in our laundry.
899
00:40:59,724 --> 00:41:03,159
- Nothing that you're saying
makes any sense right now.
900
00:41:03,161 --> 00:41:06,229
Why do you think I was at
the laundromat for so long?
901
00:41:06,231 --> 00:41:08,631
- I don't know.
- I was talking to the police.
902
00:41:08,633 --> 00:41:10,500
- Here's the police report.
Look at it.
903
00:41:10,502 --> 00:41:11,968
This is a fucking nightmare.
904
00:41:11,970 --> 00:41:13,603
Take it!
905
00:41:13,605 --> 00:41:15,872
- Okay, so where's this foot?
906
00:41:15,874 --> 00:41:17,474
- The police took it.
907
00:41:17,476 --> 00:41:19,242
- Where did they take it?
908
00:41:19,244 --> 00:41:20,543
- To the police station.
909
00:41:20,545 --> 00:41:22,011
You think they're going
to let me bring it home
910
00:41:22,013 --> 00:41:23,146
and use it as a doorstop?
911
00:41:23,148 --> 00:41:24,247
It's evidence.
912
00:41:24,249 --> 00:41:26,082
- Who's foot is it, Ron?
Who's foot?
913
00:41:26,084 --> 00:41:27,917
- Daniel day-Lewis'?
914
00:41:27,919 --> 00:41:30,019
How am I supposed to know
whose fucking foot it is.
915
00:41:30,021 --> 00:41:31,254
I don't know.
916
00:41:31,256 --> 00:41:33,223
Cut me some fucking
slack here, okay.
917
00:41:33,225 --> 00:41:35,024
Somebody is fucking
with me in a big,
918
00:41:35,026 --> 00:41:39,028
major fucking way,
and it's this guy here.
919
00:41:39,030 --> 00:41:41,631
- Wait. What did you do
with the laundry?
920
00:41:41,633 --> 00:41:43,833
- I threw it away.
921
00:41:43,835 --> 00:41:45,969
- Why would you throw
the laundry away?
922
00:41:45,971 --> 00:41:47,437
- Do you want me to bring
the laundry back here?
923
00:41:47,439 --> 00:41:49,205
There was a hot, severed,
festering foot in the laundry.
924
00:41:49,207 --> 00:41:50,273
You want me to
bring it back here?
925
00:41:50,275 --> 00:41:51,774
Do you know how
unsanitary that is?
926
00:41:51,776 --> 00:41:53,977
I was thinking about us.
That shit's toxic.
927
00:41:53,979 --> 00:41:55,278
- I fucking hate you.
928
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:57,981
My favorite shirt
was in that laundry.
929
00:42:01,986 --> 00:42:03,887
- Can I talk to you
for a second please?
930
00:42:03,889 --> 00:42:07,790
It'll just take a second.
Just have a seat, please.
931
00:42:10,294 --> 00:42:13,530
Your book bag looks a
little heavy today.
932
00:42:13,532 --> 00:42:14,998
What you got in there?
933
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:19,002
- Since when did you start
carrying books in your book bag?
934
00:42:19,004 --> 00:42:24,474
Listen, I just learned that
your grandfather had his...
935
00:42:24,476 --> 00:42:26,676
He lost his foot.
936
00:42:26,678 --> 00:42:27,644
- What?
937
00:42:27,646 --> 00:42:30,046
- He had his foot amputated?
938
00:42:30,048 --> 00:42:31,714
- He had his leg amputated.
939
00:42:31,716 --> 00:42:34,551
- So, it's true.
940
00:42:34,553 --> 00:42:37,086
- What are you saying right now?
941
00:42:37,088 --> 00:42:39,188
- Do you have access
to the foot?
942
00:42:39,190 --> 00:42:40,890
Did you have access to
the foot in some way?
943
00:42:40,892 --> 00:42:43,159
- No, I do not have
access to his foot.
944
00:42:43,161 --> 00:42:45,261
- Look, rain.
I know you don't like me, okay.
945
00:42:45,263 --> 00:42:47,297
But what you're doing
is criminal behavior
946
00:42:47,299 --> 00:42:48,831
and if you don't stop,
I'm telling you,
947
00:42:48,833 --> 00:42:51,067
it could jeopardize your
chances at college.
948
00:42:51,069 --> 00:42:54,037
- What are you
accusing me of, exactly?
949
00:42:54,039 --> 00:42:56,706
- Just stop what
you're doing, sister.
950
00:42:56,708 --> 00:42:57,707
- Sister?
951
00:42:57,709 --> 00:42:58,942
- Just, stop what you're doing
952
00:42:58,944 --> 00:43:02,045
because if you don't stop
what you're doing,
953
00:43:02,047 --> 00:43:05,114
I'm going to make your life
a living hell, okay.
954
00:43:05,116 --> 00:43:06,983
I'm going to fuck you up.
955
00:43:06,985 --> 00:43:08,618
- You're fucking ridiculous.
956
00:43:08,620 --> 00:43:12,121
- If you keep interfering
with my life, okay?
957
00:43:12,123 --> 00:43:15,024
I just want you to know that.
958
00:43:17,595 --> 00:43:20,997
Okay.
959
00:43:20,999 --> 00:43:22,632
- He's making the
whole thing up.
960
00:43:22,634 --> 00:43:24,701
- Of course he is.
961
00:43:24,703 --> 00:43:27,770
- I manage multi-million
dollar accounts.
962
00:43:27,772 --> 00:43:30,640
I do business with
fortune 500 CEOs.
963
00:43:30,642 --> 00:43:33,042
- No, you don't.
Which ones?
964
00:43:33,044 --> 00:43:35,311
- Okay, middle-managers.
965
00:43:35,313 --> 00:43:37,647
But they could be CEOs one day.
966
00:43:37,649 --> 00:43:39,749
- What's your point?
967
00:43:39,751 --> 00:43:42,318
- The point is that I'm not
sending body parts to Ron
968
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:44,621
and the fact that I'm having
dinner to defend myself
969
00:43:44,623 --> 00:43:46,255
is beyond insulting.
970
00:43:46,257 --> 00:43:50,727
- It's about more than that.
It's about fixing things.
971
00:43:51,328 --> 00:43:53,630
- I'm not ready.
972
00:44:00,337 --> 00:44:02,905
- There's a lot of negative
energy between us right now,
973
00:44:02,907 --> 00:44:05,908
but the important thing
is that we're here
974
00:44:05,910 --> 00:44:08,978
and we're being honest
with each other.
975
00:44:08,980 --> 00:44:10,313
It shows that we care
976
00:44:10,315 --> 00:44:14,283
and that we think this
friendship is worth saving.
977
00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:17,286
Right?
978
00:44:17,288 --> 00:44:18,388
- Uh-huh.
979
00:44:18,390 --> 00:44:20,289
- Great speech.
- Thanks.
980
00:44:20,291 --> 00:44:22,091
- Seriously.
Martin Luther King, Jr. worthy.
981
00:44:22,093 --> 00:44:23,960
- Are you all ready to order?
982
00:44:23,962 --> 00:44:26,062
- I'm not really hungry but
I'll have another drink please.
983
00:44:26,064 --> 00:44:27,230
- Me too,
I'll have another one.
984
00:44:27,232 --> 00:44:28,831
- Yeah, more sangria, please.
985
00:44:28,833 --> 00:44:30,900
- Yeah.
Another, please.
986
00:44:30,902 --> 00:44:33,670
- Just keep them coming, okay.
Just keep bringing drinks.
987
00:44:33,672 --> 00:44:36,105
- Of course.
- Yeah, thanks.
988
00:44:36,875 --> 00:44:40,209
We can probably just have
something light tonight,
989
00:44:40,211 --> 00:44:41,744
like fingerfood.
990
00:44:41,746 --> 00:44:44,247
Les, you've probably have
some on hand, right?
991
00:44:44,249 --> 00:44:45,915
Fingerfood? Can you give
us some finger food?
992
00:44:45,917 --> 00:44:48,051
A little finger action?
993
00:44:48,053 --> 00:44:49,252
- You know, Ron,
994
00:44:49,254 --> 00:44:51,120
I'm not the
passive-aggressive type.
995
00:44:51,122 --> 00:44:53,856
If I wanted revenge, I wouldn't
send you body parts.
996
00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:56,059
I'd just take you out back
and beat the shit out of you.
997
00:44:56,061 --> 00:44:57,293
- Is that right?
- Yeah.
998
00:44:57,295 --> 00:44:58,361
- And I still might.
999
00:44:58,363 --> 00:45:01,164
- Let's go out here, right now.
- Let's go.
1000
00:45:01,166 --> 00:45:02,932
- Just stop it.
Sit down, right now.
1001
00:45:02,934 --> 00:45:04,434
- You wanna go?
- Sit down. Sit down.
1002
00:45:04,436 --> 00:45:06,035
- You think I'm playing around?
1003
00:45:06,037 --> 00:45:08,071
- No one is going outside.
1004
00:45:08,073 --> 00:45:10,006
- We're going to sit here
like mature adults
1005
00:45:10,008 --> 00:45:11,441
- and work through this.
- If Italy and Turkey
were in a war,
1006
00:45:11,443 --> 00:45:14,844
we'd fucking beat the
shit out of all you guys.
1007
00:45:14,846 --> 00:45:16,879
- We own you!
- No, we'd fuck you up!
1008
00:45:16,881 --> 00:45:19,115
- Constantinople?
That's a Roman city?
1009
00:45:19,117 --> 00:45:21,217
- That was then.
I'm talking about now.
1010
00:45:21,219 --> 00:45:22,452
- Yeah, that shit's coming back.
1011
00:45:22,454 --> 00:45:24,487
- Turkish little prick.
- Right in front.
1012
00:45:24,489 --> 00:45:26,122
- Right here, right now.
1013
00:45:26,124 --> 00:45:28,791
- Men are so stupid.
1014
00:45:30,829 --> 00:45:36,365
- Alcohol is the greatest
drug on earth, you know.
1015
00:45:36,367 --> 00:45:38,501
There's a reason why
they call them spirits.
1016
00:45:38,503 --> 00:45:39,902
Because they sure do lift them.
1017
00:45:39,904 --> 00:45:41,237
- I've got to make a phone call.
1018
00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:42,905
- Who you gonna call?
1019
00:45:42,907 --> 00:45:45,475
- Ghostbusters.
None of your fucking business.
1020
00:45:45,477 --> 00:45:48,044
- Tell bill Murray I said hello.
1021
00:45:48,046 --> 00:45:51,981
- It's just a work thing.
I'll be right back.
1022
00:45:53,118 --> 00:45:57,987
Isn't les like that asshole boss
that everyone hates at work?
1023
00:45:57,989 --> 00:46:00,857
He's always looking over your
shoulder and micro-managing you.
1024
00:46:00,859 --> 00:46:02,425
Now that he's gone,
it's like we're on vacation
1025
00:46:02,427 --> 00:46:03,793
and we can just relax.
1026
00:46:03,795 --> 00:46:05,228
- I'm going to go to the
bathroom.
1027
00:46:05,230 --> 00:46:06,395
- Okay, baby.
I love you.
1028
00:46:06,397 --> 00:46:09,332
- Uh-huh.
Try not to finger each other.
1029
00:46:10,267 --> 00:46:12,869
- That's funny.
Isn't that funny?
1030
00:46:12,871 --> 00:46:14,904
- No.
1031
00:46:26,416 --> 00:46:29,418
- Everything's falling apart.
Right before our very eyes.
1032
00:46:29,420 --> 00:46:33,256
- Who cares?
Another failed marriage or two.
1033
00:46:33,258 --> 00:46:36,058
It's not even going to make
a dent in the divorce rate.
1034
00:46:36,060 --> 00:46:38,127
Think about what's
happening in Iraq.
1035
00:46:38,129 --> 00:46:41,264
They've got problems.
This is nothing.
1036
00:46:41,266 --> 00:46:43,299
- I have a healthy marriage.
1037
00:46:43,301 --> 00:46:47,036
I had a healthy marriage.
And I have to fix this.
1038
00:46:47,038 --> 00:46:48,371
- Be honest.
1039
00:46:48,373 --> 00:46:49,839
Don't you think these
two are blowing things
1040
00:46:49,841 --> 00:46:51,440
out of proportion
a little bit.
1041
00:46:51,442 --> 00:46:53,476
- Yeah, a little bit.
1042
00:46:53,944 --> 00:46:55,311
- Is that really the worst
thing you've ever done?
1043
00:46:55,313 --> 00:46:57,180
Cheated on your husband?
1044
00:46:57,182 --> 00:47:00,049
- I don't consider what
happened with you cheating.
1045
00:47:00,051 --> 00:47:02,318
I've done more than that
with first cousins, okay?
1046
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:03,920
- Then why are you so guilty?
1047
00:47:03,922 --> 00:47:05,421
Why are you overridden
with guilt?
1048
00:47:05,423 --> 00:47:07,957
You're not supposed to do
that when you're married.
1049
00:47:07,959 --> 00:47:11,928
- I don't think so.
I just think you're confused.
1050
00:47:11,930 --> 00:47:15,932
- Les showed me video
of you in college.
1051
00:47:15,934 --> 00:47:19,035
You were at some kind of parade,
and you were down on all fours
1052
00:47:19,037 --> 00:47:21,470
and you were wearing furry ears
and howling at the moon.
1053
00:47:21,472 --> 00:47:24,207
I don't know what that was
about but it was ridiculous.
1054
00:47:24,209 --> 00:47:27,009
- That was for animal rights.
1055
00:47:27,011 --> 00:47:29,846
That wasn't confusion.
It was for animal rights.
1056
00:47:29,848 --> 00:47:32,348
- Animals don't have rights,
Kate.
1057
00:47:32,350 --> 00:47:34,283
- Yes, they do.
1058
00:47:34,285 --> 00:47:36,853
- You and Bob barker,
i swear to god.
1059
00:47:36,855 --> 00:47:38,487
- What about Bob barker?
1060
00:47:38,489 --> 00:47:40,056
- Remember, at the end
of the price is right,
1061
00:47:40,058 --> 00:47:44,360
he would say, "get your
pets spayed and neutered."
1062
00:47:44,362 --> 00:47:46,095
- Remember when he'd say that?
- Yeah. Yeah, you should.
1063
00:47:46,097 --> 00:47:48,965
- He's the one who should
have been neutered, okay.
1064
00:47:48,967 --> 00:47:51,467
He was fucking
everybody on that show.
1065
00:47:51,469 --> 00:47:53,369
They should have cut his
balls off, probably.
1066
00:47:53,371 --> 00:47:56,005
- Well, listen.
That's the other thing.
1067
00:47:56,007 --> 00:47:58,074
He peed on a puppy
1068
00:47:58,076 --> 00:48:01,510
and I think that's why i
just wanted to hurt him.
1069
00:48:01,512 --> 00:48:04,914
That's why I told him about us.
1070
00:48:04,916 --> 00:48:06,649
- Bob barker peed on a puppy?
1071
00:48:06,651 --> 00:48:09,118
- No!
Les peed on a puppy.
1072
00:48:09,120 --> 00:48:10,519
- Les peed on a puppy?
- Yes.
1073
00:48:10,521 --> 00:48:12,388
- Why did he pee on a puppy?
- I don't know.
1074
00:48:12,390 --> 00:48:13,890
- What kind of person
pees on a puppy?
1075
00:48:13,892 --> 00:48:16,392
- It's disturbing, I know.
- It is disturbing.
1076
00:48:16,394 --> 00:48:18,928
- It's serial killer shit
is what it is.
1077
00:48:18,930 --> 00:48:20,529
That's what they do.
It's a common denominator.
1078
00:48:20,531 --> 00:48:22,398
They torture animals
at a young age.
1079
00:48:22,400 --> 00:48:24,934
I'm telling you.
He's sending me body parts.
1080
00:48:24,936 --> 00:48:27,003
- He is.
- No, he's not.
1081
00:48:27,005 --> 00:48:31,240
He looked you in the eyes and
he told you he wasn't doing it.
1082
00:48:31,242 --> 00:48:33,142
He is not sending
you body parts.
1083
00:48:33,144 --> 00:48:35,144
- I don't believe it.
- He's not. No.
1084
00:48:35,146 --> 00:48:36,946
- Especially now,
after hearing this.
1085
00:48:36,948 --> 00:48:38,981
- He would never.
- He's dangerous.
1086
00:48:38,983 --> 00:48:40,516
- You're in danger.
1087
00:48:41,018 --> 00:48:43,019
- Oh hey, what's up?
1088
00:48:43,021 --> 00:48:44,921
We were just talking about
"the brothers karamazov,
1089
00:48:44,923 --> 00:48:46,389
that book,
that Russian novel.
1090
00:48:46,391 --> 00:48:47,657
If I had finished reading it,
1091
00:48:47,659 --> 00:48:49,692
it might have been the
best book I ever read.
1092
00:48:49,694 --> 00:48:51,694
- I didn't finish it either.
1093
00:48:51,696 --> 00:48:53,663
- What's on your face?
1094
00:48:53,665 --> 00:48:55,631
- Should we order some food?
1095
00:48:55,633 --> 00:48:58,634
I am fucking starving.
1096
00:49:01,973 --> 00:49:04,240
♪
1097
00:49:13,317 --> 00:49:15,251
- Yeah.
1098
00:49:15,253 --> 00:49:18,020
Right there.
Yeah, that's good.
1099
00:49:24,061 --> 00:49:26,662
Oh yeah.
Fuck me harder!
1100
00:49:26,664 --> 00:49:28,197
Yeah.
1101
00:49:29,499 --> 00:49:32,969
Oh god!
Oh god!
1102
00:49:34,371 --> 00:49:36,072
Harder!
1103
00:49:36,074 --> 00:49:37,974
Pull my hair!
1104
00:49:41,078 --> 00:49:42,611
- Oh god.
Oh god.
1105
00:49:42,613 --> 00:49:45,348
- Cum on my stomach!
Cum on my stomach!
1106
00:49:45,350 --> 00:49:48,384
Yeah, yeah.
1107
00:49:51,588 --> 00:49:54,090
- My god.
1108
00:49:54,092 --> 00:49:56,625
That was amazing.
1109
00:50:00,163 --> 00:50:01,597
I love you.
1110
00:50:01,599 --> 00:50:03,666
- I love you.
1111
00:50:12,409 --> 00:50:15,077
- Are we that shallow that all
it takes is a little payback
1112
00:50:15,079 --> 00:50:16,645
and all is well?
1113
00:50:16,647 --> 00:50:19,215
I make out with your friend,
you make out with my friend
1114
00:50:19,217 --> 00:50:20,649
and the slate's wiped clean.
1115
00:50:20,651 --> 00:50:23,252
- We didn't just make out.
1116
00:50:23,254 --> 00:50:24,787
- Where did you do it?
In the bathroom?
1117
00:50:24,789 --> 00:50:27,123
- Is that where you hooked up?
- Uh-huh.
1118
00:50:27,125 --> 00:50:29,091
- I'm not even jealous.
1119
00:50:29,093 --> 00:50:31,761
- Yeah, but we didn't
just make out, Ron.
1120
00:50:31,763 --> 00:50:32,762
- What do you mean?
1121
00:50:32,764 --> 00:50:35,331
- I gave him a blowjob.
1122
00:50:42,139 --> 00:50:44,273
- Okay,
let me just get this straight.
1123
00:50:44,275 --> 00:50:48,244
So you're saying that women
should wear the hijab.
1124
00:50:48,246 --> 00:50:52,648
- I think I may be starting to
understand why women should...
1125
00:50:52,650 --> 00:50:54,417
- So they have an obligation?
1126
00:50:54,419 --> 00:50:56,519
- Not an obligation,
but I feel I understand...
1127
00:50:56,521 --> 00:50:58,154
- Is that their only obligation?
1128
00:50:58,156 --> 00:51:00,823
- I understand why there's
a reason behind, why,
1129
00:51:00,825 --> 00:51:02,591
- maybe, they should wear it.
- So, what's the reason?
1130
00:51:02,593 --> 00:51:05,227
Because men can't
control themselves?
1131
00:51:05,229 --> 00:51:07,329
- I think that's a very
good way to look at it.
1132
00:51:07,331 --> 00:51:09,565
Because men think
about sex all the time.
1133
00:51:09,567 --> 00:51:11,600
- Women think about sex too.
1134
00:51:11,602 --> 00:51:13,436
- I know women think
about sex all the time.
1135
00:51:13,438 --> 00:51:17,306
If you all didn't act upon
your sexual impulses so much,
1136
00:51:17,308 --> 00:51:21,677
maybe there wouldn't be
these things happening here.
1137
00:51:23,681 --> 00:51:25,815
- You used to be my
favorite teacher.
1138
00:51:25,817 --> 00:51:27,650
Now I think you're a scum.
1139
00:51:27,652 --> 00:51:29,718
- I was just...Uh...
1140
00:51:29,720 --> 00:51:32,254
- Talk about empathy.
1141
00:51:32,256 --> 00:51:34,757
- Do we belong in a kitchen too?
1142
00:51:34,759 --> 00:51:36,659
- I'm really disappointed.
1143
00:51:50,807 --> 00:51:53,609
- Hey.
- Hey.
1144
00:51:59,883 --> 00:52:02,384
- So, you're just not
going to talk to me now?
1145
00:52:02,386 --> 00:52:05,287
- There's nothing to talk about.
1146
00:52:06,756 --> 00:52:09,625
- Well, how about,
"how's your day?"
1147
00:52:09,627 --> 00:52:11,627
- Do you want to know
how my day went?
- Yeah.
1148
00:52:11,629 --> 00:52:13,129
- Same day as it always is.
1149
00:52:13,131 --> 00:52:14,697
I'm teaching a bunch of
useless information
1150
00:52:14,699 --> 00:52:17,733
who don't give a fuck
what I have to say.
1151
00:52:17,735 --> 00:52:19,368
That's how my day went.
1152
00:52:20,905 --> 00:52:23,772
- Who's that?
- I ordered Chinese food.
1153
00:52:23,774 --> 00:52:26,575
- Oh, well,
did you get me some?
1154
00:52:26,577 --> 00:52:28,577
- Nope.
1155
00:52:30,180 --> 00:52:31,413
Keep the change.
1156
00:52:31,415 --> 00:52:33,449
- Thanks.
1157
00:52:36,487 --> 00:52:38,454
♪
1158
00:52:42,225 --> 00:52:43,559
- They don't sell
organic tampons
1159
00:52:43,561 --> 00:52:44,860
at the commissary.
1160
00:52:44,862 --> 00:52:46,395
They sell that generic shit.
1161
00:52:46,397 --> 00:52:48,531
It feels like fly paper.
I can't use that.
1162
00:52:48,533 --> 00:52:52,568
- It's not my fault
you've got a sensitive vagina.
1163
00:52:52,570 --> 00:52:54,937
- So that's how it's
going to be, huh?
1164
00:52:54,939 --> 00:52:58,340
- You're just going to act
like I'm not here.
1165
00:52:58,342 --> 00:52:59,508
- I guess so.
1166
00:52:59,510 --> 00:53:02,611
- Real mature, Ron.
1167
00:53:02,613 --> 00:53:04,547
- I guess so.
1168
00:53:04,549 --> 00:53:07,516
- You know what your problem is?
- I guess so.
1169
00:53:07,518 --> 00:53:09,852
- You're a hypocrite.
- Uh-huh. Yep.
1170
00:53:09,854 --> 00:53:11,921
- How is what I did any
different than what you did?
1171
00:53:11,923 --> 00:53:15,824
With you having les' cock
in your mouth.
1172
00:53:15,826 --> 00:53:18,928
- Oh, okay. So your excuse is,
"oh, I got drunk,
1173
00:53:18,930 --> 00:53:20,095
- it didn't mean anything."
- That's right.
1174
00:53:20,097 --> 00:53:21,964
- Can't I use the same excuse?
- That's exactly right.
1175
00:53:21,966 --> 00:53:23,599
- You can't use the
same fucking excuse.
1176
00:53:23,601 --> 00:53:24,967
It's not the same fucking thing.
1177
00:53:24,969 --> 00:53:26,969
- Goddammit!
- What?
1178
00:53:26,971 --> 00:53:28,871
- There's a fucking
cock in my mouth!
1179
00:53:28,873 --> 00:53:31,941
There's a penis in my
fucking Chinese food!
1180
00:53:35,845 --> 00:53:38,514
- So you normally make
all the deliveries here?
1181
00:53:38,516 --> 00:53:41,450
- But you didn't
deliver it this time.
1182
00:53:41,452 --> 00:53:44,853
- Well, I was on my way here,
but a guy stopped me downstairs.
1183
00:53:44,855 --> 00:53:47,289
He said he was staying
in the same apartment.
1184
00:53:47,291 --> 00:53:50,859
So he paid for the food and
he said he would bring it up.
1185
00:53:50,861 --> 00:53:52,494
- So you let him
bring the food up?
1186
00:53:52,496 --> 00:53:54,630
Because he knew the
apartment number.
1187
00:53:54,632 --> 00:53:55,931
He knew Mr. Ron's name.
1188
00:53:55,933 --> 00:53:58,801
And he seemed to
be a very nice guy.
1189
00:53:58,803 --> 00:54:02,004
I didn't think anything bad
was going to happen.
1190
00:54:02,006 --> 00:54:04,340
Besides, he gave me a big tip.
1191
00:54:04,342 --> 00:54:07,376
You get a big tip and i
get a big dick in my mouth.
1192
00:54:07,378 --> 00:54:08,577
That's a fair exchange.
1193
00:54:08,579 --> 00:54:09,812
- I'm so sorry, Ron.
1194
00:54:09,814 --> 00:54:11,614
I brought you a new order,
on the house.
1195
00:54:11,616 --> 00:54:13,616
- You keep it, okay.
I lost my appetite.
1196
00:54:13,618 --> 00:54:15,618
I'll probably never
eat again after tonight.
1197
00:54:15,620 --> 00:54:17,253
- Well, look on the bright side.
1198
00:54:17,255 --> 00:54:19,021
Think of all the weight
you'll lose.
1199
00:54:19,023 --> 00:54:22,725
- Hey, hey, hey.
We don't need that kind of talk.
1200
00:54:22,727 --> 00:54:24,693
And in the future,
1201
00:54:24,695 --> 00:54:27,029
you need to make all the
deliveries yourself, okay.
1202
00:54:27,031 --> 00:54:29,932
- But I didn't know.
- Yeah, I know, I know, I know.
1203
00:54:29,934 --> 00:54:31,467
Is this going to
be on the Internet?
1204
00:54:31,469 --> 00:54:32,701
- I don't know about that.
1205
00:54:32,703 --> 00:54:35,037
- It's going to kill my
business. Very badly.
1206
00:54:35,039 --> 00:54:37,339
- We'll try to keep it
under wraps, okay?
1207
00:54:37,341 --> 00:54:38,907
- Okay.
Thank you, officer.
1208
00:54:38,909 --> 00:54:40,943
- Mr. Wells. Do you recall
what the man looked like
1209
00:54:40,945 --> 00:54:42,578
who delivered the food?
1210
00:54:42,580 --> 00:54:44,013
- I didn't even see the guy!
1211
00:54:44,015 --> 00:54:46,682
- I just gave him the money
and he gave me the food,
1212
00:54:46,684 --> 00:54:51,420
- so you don't look people in
the eyes when you talk to them?
1213
00:54:52,422 --> 00:54:54,590
- I was agitated.
1214
00:54:54,592 --> 00:54:57,059
- Why were you agitated?
1215
00:54:58,928 --> 00:55:01,497
- Domestic issues.
1216
00:55:01,499 --> 00:55:05,034
- What kind of domestic issues?
1217
00:55:05,036 --> 00:55:06,669
- Personal shit, man.
Its' none of your business.
1218
00:55:06,671 --> 00:55:10,406
- I just want to know
why you were agitated.
1219
00:55:10,408 --> 00:55:13,342
- I'm agitated because you're
asking me why I'm agitated.
1220
00:55:13,344 --> 00:55:15,811
I'm agitated because...
I'm just agitated.
1221
00:55:15,813 --> 00:55:19,615
I don't like it when people
ask me why I'm agitated...
1222
00:55:19,617 --> 00:55:21,483
I don't know.
1223
00:55:21,951 --> 00:55:23,952
- Miss, are you okay?
1224
00:55:23,954 --> 00:55:26,355
- It's Mrs. and she's fine.
1225
00:55:26,357 --> 00:55:29,458
- I got it.
- God damn, fucking cock!!
1226
00:55:29,460 --> 00:55:31,427
- Let's see if we can
match the severed member
1227
00:55:31,429 --> 00:55:32,528
to the severed foot.
1228
00:55:32,530 --> 00:55:34,797
It might be from the same body.
1229
00:55:34,799 --> 00:55:37,833
- Judging from the foot size,
I'd say it is.
1230
00:55:37,835 --> 00:55:40,069
- Ma'am, if you have
any trouble at all,
1231
00:55:40,071 --> 00:55:41,437
don't hesitate to call me.
1232
00:55:41,439 --> 00:55:45,574
- Wait a second, why are you
giving her special treatment?
1233
00:55:45,576 --> 00:55:48,711
I'm the one who
got violated, man.
1234
00:55:48,713 --> 00:55:49,978
- Calm down, buddy.
1235
00:55:49,980 --> 00:55:51,380
- Don't tell me to calm down.
1236
00:55:51,382 --> 00:55:52,915
There was a severed dick
in my mouth.
1237
00:55:52,917 --> 00:55:54,616
I've sucked a dick before,
in college,
1238
00:55:54,618 --> 00:55:56,885
but it was attached
to a body, okay.
1239
00:55:56,887 --> 00:55:58,620
And my wife is running around
1240
00:55:58,622 --> 00:55:59,855
acting like a fucking
sword swallower
1241
00:55:59,857 --> 00:56:01,423
from the barnum
and Bailey circus.
1242
00:56:01,425 --> 00:56:03,726
And out of all the cops in
Brooklyn they can send me,
1243
00:56:03,728 --> 00:56:06,095
they send me andré the giant
and Betty boop.
1244
00:56:06,097 --> 00:56:08,664
Okay, I want some
fucking answers!
1245
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:11,633
- No, I'll tell you this,
1246
00:56:11,635 --> 00:56:15,404
if I found a penis
in my Chinese food,
1247
00:56:15,406 --> 00:56:17,639
I'd probably throw a rock
through the window.
1248
00:56:17,641 --> 00:56:21,643
What's the name of the place?
What is it?
1249
00:56:21,645 --> 00:56:24,513
Hong Kong castle?
1250
00:56:24,515 --> 00:56:27,483
They should change it
to long dong castle.
1251
00:56:27,485 --> 00:56:30,619
Be careful ordering noodles
from that place, people.
1252
00:56:30,621 --> 00:56:33,555
You might get
something a little extra.
1253
00:56:36,025 --> 00:56:38,861
Anyway, by now most
of you have heard,
1254
00:56:38,863 --> 00:56:41,530
the chastity fielding 27,
1255
00:56:41,532 --> 00:56:43,699
crashed after take-off
on Tuesday.
1256
00:56:43,701 --> 00:56:46,769
This was supposed to be the
first commercial airplane
1257
00:56:46,771 --> 00:56:49,037
to orbit the earth.
1258
00:56:49,039 --> 00:56:50,572
- This place is great.
1259
00:56:50,574 --> 00:56:52,141
I had dinner here
a few weeks ago.
1260
00:56:52,143 --> 00:56:55,411
Yeah, well,
i hope you're paying.
1261
00:56:55,413 --> 00:56:57,913
Chastity stock is
down 50 percent.
1262
00:56:57,915 --> 00:56:59,715
- It's all right, Barry.
Don't worry.
1263
00:56:59,717 --> 00:57:01,083
I got this.
1264
00:57:01,085 --> 00:57:04,653
- "Consumer space travel,
that's the way of the future."
1265
00:57:04,655 --> 00:57:06,822
- That's what you said, dude.
- It is. It is.
1266
00:57:06,824 --> 00:57:08,924
- Well, if that first test
flight is any indication,
1267
00:57:08,926 --> 00:57:10,492
the future looks pretty bleak.
1268
00:57:10,494 --> 00:57:12,628
- Come on, Barry.
Listen.
1269
00:57:12,630 --> 00:57:15,898
It's a test,
the rocket exploded in a test.
1270
00:57:15,900 --> 00:57:17,800
That's what a test is for.
1271
00:57:17,802 --> 00:57:20,035
- You guys ready to order?
- Yeah, I think so.
1272
00:57:20,037 --> 00:57:22,438
- I was over hearing
your conversation
1273
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:24,640
about the chastity thing.
1274
00:57:24,642 --> 00:57:26,475
Man, that was a tragedy, huh.
1275
00:57:26,477 --> 00:57:30,145
They'll get a consumer flight
into space before you know it
1276
00:57:30,147 --> 00:57:32,548
and that stock's going to
take off like a rocket.
1277
00:57:32,550 --> 00:57:34,683
- Hopefully, it doesn't take
off like the last one did.
1278
00:57:34,685 --> 00:57:36,618
- Yeah, I'm pretty sure
they're going to get it up.
1279
00:57:36,620 --> 00:57:37,986
There's no doubt about that.
1280
00:57:37,988 --> 00:57:40,656
It's only a matter of time.
1281
00:57:40,658 --> 00:57:42,991
Can you imagine
being that pilot?
1282
00:57:42,993 --> 00:57:47,663
Having trained his whole life
for that one moment.
1283
00:57:47,665 --> 00:57:53,802
And then you're finally up
soaring toward the sky and
1284
00:57:53,804 --> 00:57:59,208
everything you studied for,
hoped for, dreamed for....
1285
00:57:59,210 --> 00:58:01,076
Gone.
1286
00:58:01,078 --> 00:58:04,480
- Honey,
nobody is following you.
1287
00:58:06,716 --> 00:58:09,051
Really,
with the spitting, still?
1288
00:58:12,055 --> 00:58:15,557
So, they're not actually
firing you, right?
1289
00:58:15,559 --> 00:58:17,493
- No, it's a leave of absence.
1290
00:58:17,495 --> 00:58:19,161
- Okay, so great.
How long?
1291
00:58:19,163 --> 00:58:20,796
- Like, a month.
1292
00:58:20,798 --> 00:58:21,964
- And they're paying you?
1293
00:58:21,966 --> 00:58:23,565
- Yeah.
1294
00:58:23,567 --> 00:58:25,667
- Okay, so what's the big deal?
1295
00:58:25,669 --> 00:58:28,003
- I don't get why companies act
like a leave of absence with pay
1296
00:58:28,005 --> 00:58:29,104
is punishment.
1297
00:58:29,106 --> 00:58:30,873
It's a gift.
1298
00:58:30,875 --> 00:58:33,175
- That's a good way
of looking at it.
1299
00:58:33,576 --> 00:58:35,077
- Hi.
1300
00:58:36,713 --> 00:58:38,514
- Hi.
1301
00:58:52,195 --> 00:58:54,963
- What the fuck are you doing?
1302
00:58:54,965 --> 00:58:57,032
- I'm not really hungry.
1303
00:58:57,034 --> 00:59:00,002
You got any wine or any liquor?
1304
00:59:00,004 --> 00:59:04,706
- I know who's sending
you body parts.
1305
00:59:04,708 --> 00:59:07,676
Fuck it, let's have a drink.
1306
00:59:09,979 --> 00:59:13,615
- It's just too simple, man.
It's not that simple.
- Why?
1307
00:59:13,617 --> 00:59:15,651
- Because there are too many...
- Too many what?
1308
00:59:15,653 --> 00:59:17,619
- Too many suspects.
- Who?
1309
00:59:17,621 --> 00:59:19,621
- You.
1310
00:59:19,623 --> 00:59:22,758
- I'm not sending you
body parts, okay.
1311
00:59:22,760 --> 00:59:25,260
- My students, for one.
1312
00:59:25,262 --> 00:59:26,762
- Who?
1313
00:59:26,764 --> 00:59:28,630
- Rain, the one who hates me.
1314
00:59:28,632 --> 00:59:29,765
- Why would she send you
body parts?
1315
00:59:29,767 --> 00:59:31,133
- Because she hates me.
1316
00:59:31,135 --> 00:59:32,935
- Where would she
get the body parts?
1317
00:59:32,937 --> 00:59:36,171
- Her grandfather has diabetes;
They amputated his foot.
1318
00:59:36,173 --> 00:59:38,173
- That's fucking ridiculous.
1319
00:59:38,175 --> 00:59:40,976
- You thought she took her
grandfather's amputated foot
1320
00:59:40,978 --> 00:59:43,145
and put it in the dryer?
1321
00:59:43,147 --> 00:59:45,314
- It's not funny.
- Yes, it is.
1322
00:59:45,316 --> 00:59:46,748
- Actually it isn't.
1323
00:59:46,750 --> 00:59:48,350
My uncle has diabetes.
1324
00:59:48,352 --> 00:59:51,019
- Tom Hanks has diabetes.
- What?
1325
00:59:51,021 --> 00:59:54,990
- Okay and then I thought
maybe it was rain's mom.
1326
00:59:54,992 --> 00:59:56,892
- Why would she
send you body parts?
1327
00:59:56,894 --> 00:59:58,961
- She hates arabs, okay
1328
00:59:58,963 --> 01:00:01,029
and that's the new trend
in the world,
1329
01:00:01,031 --> 01:00:02,364
is to blame the muslims.
1330
01:00:02,366 --> 01:00:03,932
- You're not Muslim.
- She doesn't know that.
1331
01:00:03,934 --> 01:00:05,867
- It's this guy, the waiter.
1332
01:00:05,869 --> 01:00:08,003
He overheard us
talking that night.
1333
01:00:08,005 --> 01:00:09,905
- Where did he get my name?
Where did he get our address?
1334
01:00:09,907 --> 01:00:12,074
- You paid for dinner.
1335
01:00:12,076 --> 01:00:15,911
- Yeah, I remember, because
you never pay for dinner.
1336
01:00:15,913 --> 01:00:17,346
But you did that night.
1337
01:00:17,348 --> 01:00:20,115
So he has your name and he
has your credit card number.
1338
01:00:20,117 --> 01:00:21,950
Finding out your address
with that information
1339
01:00:21,952 --> 01:00:23,185
isn't that difficult.
1340
01:00:23,187 --> 01:00:24,953
- Okay, possibly.
1341
01:00:24,955 --> 01:00:28,724
But the chances that it's the
same guy from college,
1342
01:00:28,726 --> 01:00:31,126
- that was 20 years ago,
there's no fucking way.
- So what?
1343
01:00:31,128 --> 01:00:34,029
- It's too coincidental.
- This shit happens
all the time.
1344
01:00:34,031 --> 01:00:35,163
- He's right, he's right.
1345
01:00:35,165 --> 01:00:37,366
My aunt turned 50,
she went to Tibet
1346
01:00:37,368 --> 01:00:39,234
on a mountain
climbing expedition.
1347
01:00:39,236 --> 01:00:41,236
She gets to the top
of this mountain,
1348
01:00:41,238 --> 01:00:44,239
there's a man sitting on a rock,
next to a camp fire.
1349
01:00:44,241 --> 01:00:46,008
It's her high school
sweetheart,
1350
01:00:46,010 --> 01:00:47,843
who she has not seen
in 30 years.
1351
01:00:47,845 --> 01:00:49,845
- Bullshit.
- I swear to god it's true.
1352
01:00:49,847 --> 01:00:52,280
It's like the guy who
accidentally fucked his sister
1353
01:00:52,282 --> 01:00:53,749
at a frat party.
1354
01:00:53,751 --> 01:00:55,350
- It's a little more
romantic than that.
1355
01:00:55,352 --> 01:00:57,085
- I hired a private investigator
1356
01:00:57,087 --> 01:00:58,920
to do a background
check on this guy
1357
01:00:58,922 --> 01:01:00,022
and find out who he is.
1358
01:01:00,024 --> 01:01:01,757
- No, you didn't.
- Yeah, I did.
1359
01:01:01,759 --> 01:01:03,191
- We can't afford a
private investigator.
1360
01:01:03,193 --> 01:01:06,395
- You don't have to worry about
it, I'm taking care of it.
1361
01:01:06,397 --> 01:01:08,764
- Well, that's pretty
big of you.
1362
01:01:08,766 --> 01:01:10,432
- Well, I'm a big man, Ron.
1363
01:01:10,434 --> 01:01:14,136
- Yeah, you are, very big.
1364
01:01:14,138 --> 01:01:17,139
- Well, you would know, Nicki.
1365
01:01:17,740 --> 01:01:19,841
- What are you talking about?
1366
01:01:20,877 --> 01:01:23,078
- Oh, he didn't tell you?
1367
01:01:23,080 --> 01:01:25,247
- Tell me what?
1368
01:01:25,249 --> 01:01:29,418
- You fucked around with him,
and that's what happens.
- I didn't fuck around with him.
1369
01:01:29,420 --> 01:01:35,457
- This is how I felt
for the last two weeks!
- She sucked your dick?
1370
01:01:35,459 --> 01:01:37,826
- I can't even believe you!
1371
01:02:04,787 --> 01:02:06,455
- His name is Wally Moore,
1372
01:02:06,457 --> 01:02:10,292
age 42,
lives in sunset park,
1373
01:02:10,294 --> 01:02:12,794
born and raised in
Minneapolis, Minnesota.
1374
01:02:12,796 --> 01:02:14,096
He waits tables at the raven.
1375
01:02:14,098 --> 01:02:15,430
- Where did this guy
go to college?
1376
01:02:15,432 --> 01:02:17,866
- Boston college,
that's where I went to school,
1377
01:02:17,868 --> 01:02:20,001
- it's got to be the same guy.
- Holy shit.
1378
01:02:20,003 --> 01:02:21,336
- What year did he graduate?
1379
01:02:21,338 --> 01:02:22,804
- He didn't.
- Why?
1380
01:02:22,806 --> 01:02:24,840
- It says he dropped out
his sophomore year.
1381
01:02:24,842 --> 01:02:28,810
- I don't know. It's strange
too, he had a scholarship.
1382
01:02:28,812 --> 01:02:30,946
- What kind of scholarship?
1383
01:02:30,948 --> 01:02:32,280
- Music.
1384
01:02:32,282 --> 01:02:35,751
Turns out, he had been
a noted saxophonist
1385
01:02:35,753 --> 01:02:37,352
from the time he was a child.
1386
01:02:37,354 --> 01:02:40,355
He was considered
something of a prodigy.
1387
01:02:40,357 --> 01:02:41,823
- A prodigy, really?
1388
01:02:41,825 --> 01:02:43,091
- Yeah, he must have
been very good
1389
01:02:43,093 --> 01:02:45,961
because he's missing two
fingers on his hand.
1390
01:02:45,963 --> 01:02:47,329
- Fuck.
1391
01:02:47,331 --> 01:02:50,899
- I ruined the guy's life.
- Come on, don't say that.
1392
01:02:50,901 --> 01:02:52,100
- What's he talking about?
1393
01:02:52,102 --> 01:02:54,035
- He cut the guys fingers off.
1394
01:02:54,037 --> 01:02:56,872
- Why did you do that?
- It was an accident.
1395
01:02:56,874 --> 01:02:58,173
- Oh, well,
that would account for
1396
01:02:58,175 --> 01:02:59,541
why he dropped out
of college.
1397
01:02:59,543 --> 01:03:01,042
- I fucked his whole life up.
1398
01:03:01,044 --> 01:03:03,378
He had dreams of being
the next Charlie Parker.
1399
01:03:03,380 --> 01:03:08,183
I severed his dreams,
literally, severed his dreams.
1400
01:03:08,185 --> 01:03:11,052
You can't be a saxophone player
with fucking three fingers.
1401
01:03:11,054 --> 01:03:13,855
- Hey, look, remember
that one-armed drummer
1402
01:03:13,857 --> 01:03:15,991
from that rock band
back in the 80's?
1403
01:03:15,993 --> 01:03:18,026
- Remember that guy?
- Uh-huh.
1404
01:03:18,028 --> 01:03:20,362
- What's your point?
1405
01:03:20,364 --> 01:03:22,330
- I don't really have one.
1406
01:03:22,332 --> 01:03:24,966
How'd you find out all
this information so quickly?
1407
01:03:24,968 --> 01:03:26,401
- Are you kidding?
1408
01:03:26,403 --> 01:03:29,938
I got half this shit
off his Facebook page.
1409
01:03:30,873 --> 01:03:33,308
- Oh, he looks happy.
- He does, doesn't he?
1410
01:03:33,310 --> 01:03:34,843
- He doesn't look sad at all.
1411
01:03:34,845 --> 01:03:36,311
- Maybe I didn't ruin his life.
1412
01:03:36,313 --> 01:03:39,047
- No, I think you
probably ruined his life.
1413
01:03:39,049 --> 01:03:40,515
- Why do you say that?
1414
01:03:40,517 --> 01:03:43,919
- He likes to go to a
jazz club called dino's.
1415
01:03:43,921 --> 01:03:45,587
- You know the place?
- No.
1416
01:03:45,589 --> 01:03:47,088
- Yeah, I know the place.
1417
01:03:47,090 --> 01:03:50,392
- Yeah, okay.
Well, go there sometime.
1418
01:03:50,394 --> 01:03:53,295
You'll see what
I'm talking about.
1419
01:03:53,297 --> 01:03:55,997
He's there almost every night.
1420
01:03:58,168 --> 01:04:00,168
♪
1421
01:04:47,183 --> 01:04:48,617
- What do we do, guys?
1422
01:04:48,619 --> 01:04:49,951
- We should follow him.
1423
01:04:49,953 --> 01:04:50,619
- What?
- You want to follow him?
1424
01:04:50,621 --> 01:04:53,355
- I don't know, it's just the
first thing I thought of.
1425
01:04:53,357 --> 01:04:56,524
- That's a dumb idea.
Think things through for once.
1426
01:04:56,526 --> 01:04:58,159
- I'm not good at thinking,
okay.
1427
01:04:58,161 --> 01:05:00,362
The first time I saw that
famous statue by rodin,
1428
01:05:00,364 --> 01:05:01,897
I didn't even
recognize what he was doing.
1429
01:05:01,899 --> 01:05:03,231
- Did you see how sad
he looked?
1430
01:05:03,233 --> 01:05:04,666
That guys looked
really depressed,
1431
01:05:04,668 --> 01:05:07,669
- I did that.
- No, you didn't.
1432
01:05:07,671 --> 01:05:09,471
- Yeah, I did.
- It's the music.
1433
01:05:09,473 --> 01:05:11,273
- That's why they
call it the blues.
1434
01:05:11,275 --> 01:05:12,540
- He could have had
an amazing career.
1435
01:05:12,542 --> 01:05:14,075
He could have been
the next scarlatti.
1436
01:05:14,077 --> 01:05:15,610
- Well, he also could have
been the next Kenny g.
1437
01:05:15,612 --> 01:05:16,912
Maybe you did the world a favor.
1438
01:05:16,914 --> 01:05:19,114
- I should go talk to him,
maybe.
1439
01:05:19,116 --> 01:05:20,849
I should maybe talk to him
and try to make amends,
or something.
1440
01:05:20,851 --> 01:05:22,550
- Ron, you should
go to the police.
1441
01:05:22,552 --> 01:05:24,219
He's clearly the guy who's been
sending you those body parts
1442
01:05:24,221 --> 01:05:24,986
and he's dangerous.
1443
01:05:24,988 --> 01:05:26,121
- She's right, Ron.
1444
01:05:26,123 --> 01:05:27,956
- Right?
1445
01:05:28,524 --> 01:05:30,258
What?
What's wrong?
1446
01:05:30,260 --> 01:05:31,660
Why are you looking at me
like that?
1447
01:05:31,662 --> 01:05:33,228
- I'm just looking at you.
1448
01:05:33,230 --> 01:05:35,664
You're so beautiful.
1449
01:05:35,666 --> 01:05:39,534
I can see why les wanted to
put his dick in your mouth.
1450
01:05:41,170 --> 01:05:44,673
- I've gotten my fair share of
hate mail all over the years,
1451
01:05:44,675 --> 01:05:48,510
telling me I'm a scumbag,
1452
01:05:48,512 --> 01:05:52,681
the scourge of the earth,
the cancer of the airwaves.
1453
01:05:52,683 --> 01:05:56,418
But no one's ever sent
me a severed animal head,
1454
01:05:56,420 --> 01:05:57,552
until today.
1455
01:05:57,554 --> 01:05:59,187
I think it was a cat,
1456
01:05:59,189 --> 01:06:03,992
I didn't keep it long enough
to find out.
1457
01:06:03,994 --> 01:06:07,562
It was terrifying
in a lot of ways,
1458
01:06:07,564 --> 01:06:09,264
knowing that someone went
through the trouble
1459
01:06:09,266 --> 01:06:10,699
to send me such a thing.
1460
01:06:10,701 --> 01:06:16,104
I'm a little rattled,
i will admit.
1461
01:06:16,106 --> 01:06:18,039
But I'm not deterred.
1462
01:06:18,041 --> 01:06:20,408
The words I say,
the opinions I take,
1463
01:06:20,410 --> 01:06:22,978
the thoughts in my head,
they will not cease.
1464
01:06:22,980 --> 01:06:25,714
They will flow from my mouth
like a furious river.
1465
01:06:25,716 --> 01:06:29,617
Decapitate all the cats in
Brooklyn if you have to.
1466
01:06:29,619 --> 01:06:30,685
Call in Isis!
1467
01:06:30,687 --> 01:06:33,188
I will not be intimidated!
1468
01:06:33,190 --> 01:06:35,991
You do not scare me!
1469
01:06:39,628 --> 01:06:42,998
- We're looking for
a Mr. Wally Moore.
1470
01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:44,566
- That's me.
1471
01:06:44,568 --> 01:06:48,503
We would like to just ask
you a couple questions.
1472
01:06:48,505 --> 01:06:51,373
- Yeah, I've got a second.
What's up?
1473
01:06:51,375 --> 01:06:56,344
- Do you have a place,
we can speak privately?
1474
01:06:56,346 --> 01:07:00,048
- Yeah, come on in back.
1475
01:07:00,050 --> 01:07:02,083
- Thank you, sir.
1476
01:07:08,491 --> 01:07:10,091
- So I got something here
for you,
1477
01:07:10,093 --> 01:07:11,393
one of my favorite things.
1478
01:07:11,395 --> 01:07:14,396
This place has the best
cupcakes in Brooklyn.
1479
01:07:14,398 --> 01:07:17,032
So these are red velvet,
1480
01:07:17,034 --> 01:07:18,633
- and they are to die for.
- Dig in, buddy.
1481
01:07:18,635 --> 01:07:20,568
- They are so good.
1482
01:07:20,570 --> 01:07:22,303
- Come on, have one, wycoff.
1483
01:07:22,305 --> 01:07:25,106
- You don't eat sugar?
You don't eat sweets?
1484
01:07:25,108 --> 01:07:30,078
- Its good, right.
It's delicious, it's amazing.
- Awesome.
1485
01:07:30,080 --> 01:07:33,048
- So what's the status?
1486
01:07:35,117 --> 01:07:38,686
- We got the DNA samples
back from the body parts.
1487
01:07:38,688 --> 01:07:40,655
- Well, that's great.
Who's the victim?
1488
01:07:40,657 --> 01:07:42,257
- No idea.
1489
01:07:42,259 --> 01:07:44,259
We couldn't track the person.
1490
01:07:44,261 --> 01:07:47,395
It's a male, white guy,
that's all we know.
1491
01:07:47,397 --> 01:07:49,297
- That could be anybody.
1492
01:07:49,299 --> 01:07:52,634
- That's correct, there are a
lot of white people in New York.
1493
01:07:53,669 --> 01:07:58,406
- Okay, so now what?
What happens now?
1494
01:07:58,408 --> 01:08:01,743
- So, we don't know who it is.
1495
01:08:03,145 --> 01:08:05,814
But this is where it gets
especially strange.
1496
01:08:05,816 --> 01:08:07,182
- Okay.
1497
01:08:07,184 --> 01:08:10,351
- The blood on the foot,
it wasn't real.
1498
01:08:10,353 --> 01:08:12,821
- That doesn't make
any sense at all.
1499
01:08:12,823 --> 01:08:15,457
- That doesn't make any sense.
1500
01:08:15,459 --> 01:08:17,859
- You're saying it's fake blood?
1501
01:08:17,861 --> 01:08:20,562
Like fake blood from
like, the fake blood store?
1502
01:08:20,564 --> 01:08:22,764
- Tomato sauce.
1503
01:08:22,766 --> 01:08:25,166
- Tomato...Tomato sauce?
1504
01:08:25,168 --> 01:08:27,602
- Marinara.
1505
01:08:27,604 --> 01:08:30,305
- Marinara?
Marinara?
1506
01:08:30,307 --> 01:08:31,840
Marinara, marinara,
like, the marinara sauce,
1507
01:08:31,842 --> 01:08:34,809
- yeah, marinara, marinara.
Yeah.
1508
01:08:34,811 --> 01:08:38,580
- Why would the guy put
marinara sauce on a real foot?
1509
01:08:38,582 --> 01:08:40,715
- Why would he do that?
- That, my friend,
is a good question.
1510
01:08:40,717 --> 01:08:42,317
- Yeah, and what's the answer?
1511
01:08:42,319 --> 01:08:45,120
- I don't have the answer.
The guy's probably nuts.
1512
01:08:45,122 --> 01:08:47,455
- Yeah, the guys' probably nuts.
1513
01:08:47,457 --> 01:08:49,390
You talked to the guy?
1514
01:08:49,392 --> 01:08:51,359
- Which one?
1515
01:08:51,361 --> 01:08:53,862
- Wally, the waiter,
the guy I went to college with.
1516
01:08:53,864 --> 01:08:57,398
- Yeah, yeah, that guy.
Yeah, we talked to him.
1517
01:08:57,400 --> 01:08:58,833
- And?
1518
01:08:58,835 --> 01:09:01,503
- He didn't do it.
1519
01:09:01,505 --> 01:09:03,738
- You didn't arrest the guy?
- No.
1520
01:09:03,740 --> 01:09:05,140
- Why didn't you arrest the guy?
1521
01:09:05,142 --> 01:09:06,608
- I just told you,
he didn't do it.
1522
01:09:06,610 --> 01:09:07,742
- Of course he did it.
1523
01:09:07,744 --> 01:09:09,477
This is the guy,
I'm telling you...
1524
01:09:09,479 --> 01:09:12,614
- Look, we interviewed the guy
and he was a really nice guy.
1525
01:09:12,616 --> 01:09:15,216
- He's a very nice guy.
- He is, yeah.
1526
01:09:15,218 --> 01:09:17,585
- Ted Bundy was a nice guy,
okay.
1527
01:09:17,587 --> 01:09:19,554
Just because your nice doesn't
mean you're not capable of
1528
01:09:19,556 --> 01:09:21,890
doing really fucked up
crazy morbid up shit.
1529
01:09:21,892 --> 01:09:25,326
- Hey, watch the tone.
1530
01:09:25,328 --> 01:09:29,330
I got to remember this place.
These cupcakes are awesome.
1531
01:09:29,332 --> 01:09:30,832
Have another one.
1532
01:09:32,602 --> 01:09:34,769
♪
1533
01:10:01,564 --> 01:10:03,231
- What?
1534
01:10:03,233 --> 01:10:04,632
Stop!
1535
01:10:04,634 --> 01:10:06,734
Police!!!
1536
01:10:09,271 --> 01:10:11,306
Somebody stop her!!
1537
01:10:13,443 --> 01:10:15,476
♪
1538
01:10:24,486 --> 01:10:27,789
- She ripped my heart out.
I had no idea it was coming.
1539
01:10:28,624 --> 01:10:30,425
Oh, shit!
1540
01:10:35,632 --> 01:10:37,732
♪
1541
01:10:45,307 --> 01:10:48,676
- We don't understand why
she was in Muslim garb.
1542
01:10:48,678 --> 01:10:51,546
- No, this is something
we just can't figure out.
1543
01:10:51,548 --> 01:10:55,717
We raised her as
a Greek orthodox.
1544
01:10:55,719 --> 01:11:01,723
- You know, I think that she
just really liked the style.
1545
01:11:01,725 --> 01:11:04,692
And she had very
eclectic tastes.
1546
01:11:04,694 --> 01:11:06,561
- Too bad it's not
an Irish funeral,
1547
01:11:06,563 --> 01:11:08,763
we could go get
fucked up afterwards.
1548
01:11:08,765 --> 01:11:11,366
- Oh, that's what they do after
an Irish funeral, right?
- Yeah.
1549
01:11:11,368 --> 01:11:13,301
- They all get wasted
and dance around?
- Yeah.
1550
01:11:13,303 --> 01:11:14,669
- I've never been
to one of those.
1551
01:11:14,671 --> 01:11:16,704
- Hey, listen...I'm going
to have a photo opening
1552
01:11:16,706 --> 01:11:18,773
next week and I would
love for you to come.
1553
01:11:18,775 --> 01:11:23,011
You want to go to a
photo show next week?
1554
01:11:23,013 --> 01:11:24,445
- Yeah, sure.
1555
01:11:24,447 --> 01:11:25,680
- Yeah, what kind of photos?
1556
01:11:25,682 --> 01:11:27,849
- It's hardcore porn.
1557
01:11:27,851 --> 01:11:29,417
- We have to go now, les.
1558
01:11:29,419 --> 01:11:31,653
I'm sorry we can't ask you
to come to dinner with us
1559
01:11:31,655 --> 01:11:33,488
but we only have a
reservation for four.
1560
01:11:33,490 --> 01:11:36,591
- You'll come by later and
we'll have some coffee.
1561
01:11:36,593 --> 01:11:38,326
- Good,
we have questions to ask.
1562
01:11:38,328 --> 01:11:40,028
You take care of yourself.
1563
01:11:42,299 --> 01:11:43,965
♪
1564
01:12:02,351 --> 01:12:03,618
- Oh shit.
1565
01:12:03,620 --> 01:12:05,787
I forgot to put these
by the grave.
1566
01:12:05,789 --> 01:12:08,022
I should go back, maybe.
1567
01:12:08,024 --> 01:12:09,524
- I'll put them there for you.
- Would you?
1568
01:12:09,526 --> 01:12:10,491
- Yeah, of course.
1569
01:12:10,493 --> 01:12:12,393
- Thanks, I'm so exhausted.
1570
01:12:12,395 --> 01:12:14,062
I feel like I'm
going to pass out.
1571
01:12:14,064 --> 01:12:15,463
- You don't look well.
1572
01:12:15,465 --> 01:12:17,398
Have you been
drinking enough water?
1573
01:12:17,400 --> 01:12:18,599
- No.
1574
01:12:18,601 --> 01:12:22,103
- Here les, drink this.
I'll be back.
1575
01:12:27,109 --> 01:12:29,510
- It was a nice ceremony.
1576
01:12:31,046 --> 01:12:32,914
- When the priest kept saying,
"ashes to ashes
1577
01:12:32,916 --> 01:12:35,049
and dust to dust,"
1578
01:12:35,051 --> 01:12:38,453
all I could think about was how
badly I wanted a cigarette.
1579
01:12:41,090 --> 01:12:43,891
- She's in a better place.
1580
01:12:43,893 --> 01:12:45,626
- You really think
being in a wooden box,
1581
01:12:45,628 --> 01:12:48,129
6 feet under,
is a better place?
1582
01:12:48,131 --> 01:12:51,899
- Maybe, if you're agoraphobic.
1583
01:12:54,703 --> 01:12:57,138
- I haven't had a cigarette
in 25 years.
1584
01:12:57,140 --> 01:12:59,540
- Really?
1585
01:12:59,542 --> 01:13:02,910
- You know, a lot of people
started smoking after 9/11.
1586
01:13:05,514 --> 01:13:08,750
- Maybe the cigarette
companies were behind it.
1587
01:13:19,996 --> 01:13:23,531
Where you're going to
scatter the ashes?
1588
01:13:24,733 --> 01:13:27,735
- What are you talking about?
We just buried her.
1589
01:13:28,804 --> 01:13:31,506
- I knew that.
My head's in the clouds.
1590
01:13:31,508 --> 01:13:33,741
- Les, aren't Kate's parents
coming by later?
1591
01:13:33,743 --> 01:13:35,977
You want me to help clean
some of this stuff up?
1592
01:13:35,979 --> 01:13:38,045
- No, no, it's okay.
It's all right.
1593
01:13:38,047 --> 01:13:39,647
- Don't worry about it.
- I don't mind.
1594
01:13:39,649 --> 01:13:41,716
- I would be happy to do it.
- Yeah, I can help tidy up, too.
1595
01:13:41,718 --> 01:13:43,050
- I could vacuum.
- No, Ron.
1596
01:13:43,052 --> 01:13:45,420
- Why don't you go home
and I'll meet you later.
1597
01:13:45,422 --> 01:13:47,054
- No, I want to keep
les company.
1598
01:13:47,056 --> 01:13:48,456
He needs us.
1599
01:13:48,458 --> 01:13:52,727
- You should go.
It's depressing here.
1600
01:13:52,729 --> 01:13:53,728
- Yeah.
1601
01:14:01,904 --> 01:14:04,005
- Are you kidding me?
1602
01:14:04,007 --> 01:14:05,873
Oh no.
1603
01:14:05,875 --> 01:14:07,642
Fuck.
1604
01:14:07,644 --> 01:14:09,477
Hong Kong café closed?
1605
01:14:09,479 --> 01:14:11,446
- Oh, yeah, man.
1606
01:14:11,448 --> 01:14:12,814
- That was my favorite
restaurant.
1607
01:14:12,816 --> 01:14:15,082
- Dude, it was mine too.
1608
01:14:15,084 --> 01:14:16,984
But you heard what
happened, right?
1609
01:14:16,986 --> 01:14:18,453
- Yeah, I heard.
1610
01:14:18,455 --> 01:14:19,620
- Yeah, it was crazy.
1611
01:14:19,622 --> 01:14:23,224
- I didn't eat a severed...He
didn't eat a severed penis.
1612
01:14:23,226 --> 01:14:24,859
That's not what happened.
1613
01:14:24,861 --> 01:14:28,129
Cos I heard he ate a
whole severed penis.
1614
01:14:28,131 --> 01:14:29,630
- No, man, you're misinformed.
1615
01:14:29,632 --> 01:14:35,870
He didn't...He didn't...It
didn't happen, so.
1616
01:14:35,872 --> 01:14:38,906
- Did you see the
rap video, though?
1617
01:14:38,908 --> 01:14:41,042
- Rap video?
1618
01:14:41,044 --> 01:14:44,879
You're telling me, you did not
see penis in my Chinese food?
1619
01:14:44,881 --> 01:14:46,614
- Penis in my Chinese food?
1620
01:14:46,616 --> 01:14:48,683
- Man, I can't let you leave
without seeing this video.
1621
01:14:48,685 --> 01:14:50,518
Dude, this is funny.
1622
01:14:50,520 --> 01:14:52,253
- There's a penis in my
Chinese food.
1623
01:14:52,255 --> 01:14:54,655
- You put the penis
in my Chinese food.
1624
01:14:54,657 --> 01:14:56,958
You put the penis
in my Chinese food.
1625
01:14:56,960 --> 01:14:59,160
Oh shit, that ain't good!
1626
01:14:59,162 --> 01:15:01,262
- You put the penis
in my Chinese food!
1627
01:15:01,264 --> 01:15:03,531
I was hungry so
i made an order...
1628
01:15:03,533 --> 01:15:07,502
- No, this is funny, man.
- That's not funny.
1629
01:15:07,504 --> 01:15:11,739
Is in the shitter,
because of stuff like this.
1630
01:15:11,741 --> 01:15:13,941
You laughing at it
enables insipid culture.
1631
01:15:13,943 --> 01:15:15,109
You should be ashamed
of yourself.
1632
01:15:15,111 --> 01:15:17,612
- Yo, dude.
It's just a video.
1633
01:15:17,614 --> 01:15:19,847
Lighten the fuck up.
1634
01:15:25,521 --> 01:15:26,521
- Who's that?
1635
01:15:26,523 --> 01:15:29,056
- I ordered Chinese food.
1636
01:15:29,058 --> 01:15:30,525
Keep the change.
1637
01:15:30,527 --> 01:15:32,159
- Thanks.
1638
01:15:36,532 --> 01:15:37,965
- Should I just throw
this cheese out?
1639
01:15:37,967 --> 01:15:40,134
- Just leave it on the counter.
1640
01:15:40,136 --> 01:15:42,236
Kate's parents might be hungry.
1641
01:15:42,238 --> 01:15:44,805
- Ok, sure.
- Thanks.
1642
01:16:01,256 --> 01:16:04,125
- That's such a nice
picture of you two.
1643
01:16:04,127 --> 01:16:06,594
- Yeah.
1644
01:16:06,596 --> 01:16:09,730
- You two were always smiling.
1645
01:16:09,732 --> 01:16:12,066
You looked so happy.
1646
01:16:13,302 --> 01:16:15,803
- We weren't.
1647
01:16:17,773 --> 01:16:22,076
But, then, who really is?
1648
01:16:23,879 --> 01:16:26,347
- I'm not.
1649
01:16:28,317 --> 01:16:32,153
- I didn't think I could feel
any emptier.
1650
01:16:39,294 --> 01:16:42,663
- I feel exactly the same way.
1651
01:16:45,901 --> 01:16:49,837
- Is this where we're
supposed to kiss?
1652
01:16:50,872 --> 01:16:53,240
- Do you want to?
1653
01:16:53,242 --> 01:16:55,810
- I'm not sure.
1654
01:16:57,079 --> 01:17:00,881
- What do you want, les?
- Another blowjob?
1655
01:17:04,153 --> 01:17:06,854
♪
1656
01:17:22,404 --> 01:17:24,872
- How's it going, man?
1657
01:17:24,874 --> 01:17:26,340
- Good.
1658
01:17:26,342 --> 01:17:28,209
- Do you mind if I sit down?
1659
01:17:28,211 --> 01:17:29,910
- Go for it.
1660
01:17:29,912 --> 01:17:31,879
- Thanks.
1661
01:17:39,955 --> 01:17:42,156
I know it was you.
1662
01:17:45,128 --> 01:17:47,261
- You got me.
1663
01:17:57,239 --> 01:18:01,208
- I'm not a good person.
1664
01:18:01,210 --> 01:18:06,681
- Yeah, but you've
got a nice cock.
1665
01:18:06,683 --> 01:18:10,017
- I guess that's all
that matters.
1666
01:18:10,952 --> 01:18:12,219
- So, you got my name
and information
1667
01:18:12,221 --> 01:18:14,388
from my credit card, obviously.
1668
01:18:14,390 --> 01:18:19,794
- How about the body parts?
Where did you get those?
1669
01:18:19,796 --> 01:18:21,328
- I got this buddy
up in saskatchewan
1670
01:18:21,330 --> 01:18:22,997
who works in a morgue.
1671
01:18:22,999 --> 01:18:25,866
Sometimes they get bodies
they can't identify, so.
1672
01:18:25,868 --> 01:18:27,268
He owed me a favor.
1673
01:18:27,270 --> 01:18:29,704
I had him send me
a cooler of parts.
1674
01:18:29,706 --> 01:18:32,139
- He didn't ask you why
you needed the body parts?
1675
01:18:32,141 --> 01:18:33,474
- Not really.
1676
01:18:33,476 --> 01:18:35,810
I just told him I was
working on an art project
1677
01:18:35,812 --> 01:18:38,145
about suicide bombers.
1678
01:18:38,147 --> 01:18:39,814
- That's interesting.
1679
01:18:39,816 --> 01:18:41,882
Are you an artist?
1680
01:18:43,852 --> 01:18:46,087
- Not anymore.
1681
01:18:50,226 --> 01:18:52,393
♪
1682
01:19:01,436 --> 01:19:04,338
- That'll be Kate's parents.
1683
01:19:09,745 --> 01:19:12,947
I have to go pretend
that I care about them.
1684
01:19:15,183 --> 01:19:17,985
- It'll be okay.
1685
01:19:31,066 --> 01:19:34,168
- Then again, maybe it won't.
1686
01:19:34,170 --> 01:19:35,936
- All right,
what about the cops?
1687
01:19:35,938 --> 01:19:39,340
- That was easy.
I just told them I didn't do it.
1688
01:19:39,342 --> 01:19:42,309
- Yeah, they were in a hurry
to do something.
1689
01:19:42,311 --> 01:19:44,478
They wanted to go to a
café to get cupcakes,
1690
01:19:44,480 --> 01:19:46,046
or something?
1691
01:19:46,048 --> 01:19:47,348
- Fucking cupcakes?
1692
01:19:47,350 --> 01:19:49,116
- Yeah, what's that all about?
1693
01:19:49,118 --> 01:19:51,786
- All right, what about
the tomato sauce?
1694
01:19:51,788 --> 01:19:56,423
- Yeah, you put tomato
sauce on the body parts?
1695
01:19:56,425 --> 01:19:58,259
- Oh yeah.
1696
01:19:58,261 --> 01:20:00,461
- Why did you do that?
1697
01:20:00,463 --> 01:20:03,497
- Dramatic effect.
I wanted to scare you.
1698
01:20:03,499 --> 01:20:06,233
- Look, body parts
alone are scary, okay.
1699
01:20:06,235 --> 01:20:10,237
You didn't need the
tomato sauce, you know.
1700
01:20:10,239 --> 01:20:11,872
- When I looked at it,
1701
01:20:11,874 --> 01:20:14,508
it felt like it needed something
a little extra, you know?
1702
01:20:14,510 --> 01:20:17,478
- Why didn't you use
fake blood?
1703
01:20:17,480 --> 01:20:22,449
- Okay, so my grandma is really
into making this marinara sauce
1704
01:20:22,451 --> 01:20:25,186
that's an old family recipe.
1705
01:20:25,188 --> 01:20:27,955
She makes jars and jars of it
and sends it to me all the time
1706
01:20:27,957 --> 01:20:30,124
and I love the stuff,
1707
01:20:30,126 --> 01:20:31,859
but I can't eat it because
it gives me heart burn
1708
01:20:31,861 --> 01:20:35,262
- and I can't bring myself
to throw it away.
- I got it.
1709
01:20:35,264 --> 01:20:36,564
- I don't like to waste.
- I understand.
1710
01:20:36,566 --> 01:20:38,833
- Listen, can I ask
you a question?
1711
01:20:38,835 --> 01:20:43,070
- After all these years...It
happened such a long time ago.
1712
01:20:43,072 --> 01:20:45,606
Why did you do it now?
1713
01:20:47,309 --> 01:20:50,211
- Did you ever lose
something you really love?
1714
01:20:50,612 --> 01:20:52,613
- No.
1715
01:20:54,382 --> 01:20:56,150
- All right.
Well, I'll tell you...
1716
01:20:56,152 --> 01:20:57,585
- Actually,
i just lost a friend.
1717
01:20:57,587 --> 01:20:59,153
We buried her today.
My god.
1718
01:20:59,155 --> 01:21:01,889
She died a couple of days ago.
1719
01:21:01,891 --> 01:21:03,924
I liked her.
I loved her.
1720
01:21:03,926 --> 01:21:05,559
We were friends.
1721
01:21:05,561 --> 01:21:09,063
But my wife...I love her.
1722
01:21:09,065 --> 01:21:14,401
If anything happened to her,
i don't know what I'd do.
1723
01:21:14,403 --> 01:21:17,872
- I loved the saxophone, Ron.
1724
01:21:17,874 --> 01:21:21,442
Look, I'm sorry, but you
can still play, can't you?
1725
01:21:21,444 --> 01:21:24,445
Remember that one-armed drummer
from that band in the eighties
1726
01:21:24,447 --> 01:21:26,313
no one listens to anymore.
1727
01:21:26,315 --> 01:21:28,249
Remember that guy?
He got in a car accident.
1728
01:21:28,251 --> 01:21:31,051
- Def leppard is not
Charlie Parker, dude.
1729
01:21:31,053 --> 01:21:35,890
- That's a totally
different thing.
- I know, I know, okay.
1730
01:21:35,892 --> 01:21:37,558
- Look man,
i can't go the rest of my life
1731
01:21:37,560 --> 01:21:41,095
I can't be terrified
every time I open my mail.
1732
01:21:41,097 --> 01:21:44,164
You know, I need some kind
of assurance that we're cool.
1733
01:21:44,166 --> 01:21:45,466
- We're cool.
We're cool.
1734
01:21:45,468 --> 01:21:48,235
I'm out of body parts, anyway.
1735
01:21:48,237 --> 01:21:49,470
- Really?
- Yeah.
1736
01:21:49,472 --> 01:21:52,039
- So, a finger, a foot,
and a penis.
1737
01:21:52,041 --> 01:21:53,440
That's all your friend sent you?
1738
01:21:53,442 --> 01:21:55,542
- Finger, foot and penis.
Yeah.
1739
01:21:55,544 --> 01:22:00,281
- That thing with the Chinese
restaurant and the penis.
1740
01:22:00,283 --> 01:22:02,416
That video was all over
the Internet, man.
1741
01:22:02,418 --> 01:22:06,553
- It's not funny, man.
It's not funny.
1742
01:22:06,555 --> 01:22:08,689
That restaurant
went out of business.
1743
01:22:08,691 --> 01:22:11,258
- Oh, well.
I didn't want that to happen.
1744
01:22:11,260 --> 01:22:14,328
He was a really nice guy
and he had a family.
1745
01:22:14,330 --> 01:22:15,930
- Well, I'd take that back.
1746
01:22:15,932 --> 01:22:17,231
- If I could
take it back, I would.
1747
01:22:17,233 --> 01:22:19,066
I would take it back.
1748
01:22:19,068 --> 01:22:21,368
- Well, if I could go
back twenty years ago,
1749
01:22:21,370 --> 01:22:22,970
I would have never
gone to that frat party,
1750
01:22:22,972 --> 01:22:24,471
that's for sure.
1751
01:22:31,479 --> 01:22:34,515
- It's good to have closure.
1752
01:22:34,517 --> 01:22:37,985
- There's no such thing
as closure, Ron.
1753
01:22:42,958 --> 01:22:44,491
- None of us are saints.
1754
01:22:44,493 --> 01:22:49,063
None of us are perfect.
We're fallible.
1755
01:22:49,065 --> 01:22:50,731
We're vulnerable.
1756
01:22:50,733 --> 01:22:55,002
And ultimately, we are
responsible for our actions.
1757
01:22:55,004 --> 01:22:57,504
The choices we make,
the things we do,
1758
01:22:57,506 --> 01:23:04,111
and yes, the words we say,
they all have an effect,
1759
01:23:04,113 --> 01:23:07,081
for better or worse.
1760
01:23:07,083 --> 01:23:14,254
For every person I inspire,
there's someone else I piss off.
1761
01:23:14,256 --> 01:23:19,526
For every innocent life lost,
there's a thousand saved.
1762
01:23:19,528 --> 01:23:22,129
Flowers grow, flowers die.
1763
01:23:22,131 --> 01:23:24,698
The earth spins itself
round and round.
1764
01:23:24,700 --> 01:23:28,335
None of us know what's
going to happen tomorrow.
1765
01:23:31,239 --> 01:23:34,341
Maybe it's not that simple.
1766
01:23:34,343 --> 01:23:37,578
Maybe it is.
I don't have the answers.
1767
01:23:37,580 --> 01:23:42,449
I'm just one man
talking into a microphone.
1768
01:23:44,386 --> 01:23:46,587
- I fucked les.
1769
01:23:46,589 --> 01:23:51,558
- Anyway, it is Tuesday night
and you know what that means.
1770
01:23:51,560 --> 01:23:55,062
I want to hear the worst
thing you've ever done.
1771
01:23:55,064 --> 01:23:57,498
If you're brave enough
to share your story,
1772
01:23:57,500 --> 01:23:59,433
please, give me a call.
1773
01:23:59,435 --> 01:24:01,168
Phil, you're on the air.
1774
01:24:01,170 --> 01:24:03,604
Worst thing you've ever done?
1775
01:24:03,606 --> 01:24:06,440
- I haven't done
my worst thing yet.
1776
01:24:06,442 --> 01:24:08,709
- Well, everyone's
done their worst.
1777
01:24:08,711 --> 01:24:12,546
Even if it's a white lie,
it's still something.
1778
01:24:12,548 --> 01:24:15,582
- I'm going to do my
worst thing soon.
1779
01:24:15,584 --> 01:24:18,052
- Oh yeah.
What's that going to be?
1780
01:24:18,054 --> 01:24:21,188
- I'm going to kill you.
1781
01:24:21,190 --> 01:24:23,290
- Oh.
1782
01:24:23,292 --> 01:24:24,825
Is that right?
1783
01:24:24,827 --> 01:24:26,794
- You deserve to die.
1784
01:24:26,796 --> 01:24:28,328
- Why's that?
1785
01:24:28,330 --> 01:24:32,066
- I'm assuming you're the
guy sending me animal parts
1786
01:24:32,068 --> 01:24:34,134
in the mail?
1787
01:24:34,736 --> 01:24:35,636
Hello.
1788
01:24:35,638 --> 01:24:37,738
- You will die tonight.
1789
01:24:37,740 --> 01:24:41,408
- Can we get a trace
on this call?
1790
01:24:46,248 --> 01:24:48,749
♪
1791
01:25:06,301 --> 01:25:09,570
- Hi.
- Hey.
1792
01:25:10,472 --> 01:25:12,372
- Smells good.
1793
01:25:12,374 --> 01:25:15,843
- Yeah, it's a new recipe.
1794
01:25:15,845 --> 01:25:18,479
- Awesome.
1795
01:25:18,481 --> 01:25:21,248
I want to smell.
Let me smell that.
1796
01:25:21,250 --> 01:25:24,451
- Ooh. Hi.
- Hi.
1797
01:25:28,156 --> 01:25:30,524
- Hey, you've got a package.
1798
01:25:30,526 --> 01:25:32,526
- I do?
1799
01:25:32,528 --> 01:25:34,895
- It's from Ron.
1800
01:25:35,530 --> 01:25:37,498
- Really?
1801
01:25:42,203 --> 01:25:43,804
- How's he doing,
by the way?
1802
01:25:43,806 --> 01:25:45,873
- Don't ask.
1803
01:26:06,262 --> 01:26:08,228
- Jesus!
1804
01:26:13,668 --> 01:26:18,172
- Mr. welz.
Are you all right?
1805
01:26:18,174 --> 01:26:20,641
- I'm good, Christopher.
Thanks for asking.
1806
01:26:20,643 --> 01:26:21,775
- How are you?
1807
01:26:21,777 --> 01:26:23,477
- I'm fine.
1808
01:26:23,479 --> 01:26:25,212
- Did you miss me?
1809
01:26:25,214 --> 01:26:28,248
Did any of you all miss me?
1810
01:26:32,353 --> 01:26:35,789
Nobody loves Mr. welz anymore.
1811
01:26:40,328 --> 01:26:42,796
- What happened?
1812
01:26:49,405 --> 01:26:51,738
But I really don't
want to get into it.
1813
01:26:51,740 --> 01:26:54,474
Do we have something to do?
1814
01:26:54,476 --> 01:26:55,976
What are we supposed
to be doing today?
1815
01:26:55,978 --> 01:26:59,346
Isn't...Something...Something...
1816
01:26:59,348 --> 01:27:03,584
- Well, our papers on
"alternative approaches to war"
1817
01:27:03,586 --> 01:27:04,952
were due today.
1818
01:27:06,889 --> 01:27:08,488
They were due.
1819
01:27:08,490 --> 01:27:10,390
- Alternative approaches
to war, that's right.
1820
01:27:10,392 --> 01:27:13,327
Yeah. Okay.
1821
01:27:13,329 --> 01:27:15,862
Does anyone want to
read their paper?
1822
01:27:18,399 --> 01:27:20,834
Kimberly.
Of course you do.
1823
01:27:20,836 --> 01:27:23,503
Kimberly, with all the answers.
1824
01:27:23,505 --> 01:27:24,938
Well, you don't
have all the answers.
1825
01:27:24,940 --> 01:27:26,840
Put your hand down.
You don't have any answers.
1826
01:27:26,842 --> 01:27:28,442
Nobody has any answers, okay.
1827
01:27:28,444 --> 01:27:30,911
There's no, there's no,
there's no...
1828
01:27:30,913 --> 01:27:36,850
Rain, I want to hear
your paper, actually.
1829
01:27:36,852 --> 01:27:39,353
Come up here and
enlighten us with your
1830
01:27:39,355 --> 01:27:40,787
alternative approaches to war.
1831
01:27:40,789 --> 01:27:45,425
I'm really curious as to
what you think about all this,
1832
01:27:45,427 --> 01:27:47,361
you know.
1833
01:27:47,662 --> 01:27:49,930
Because I've learned
something, I think.
1834
01:27:49,932 --> 01:27:52,532
Which is right,
it is all bullshit.
1835
01:27:52,534 --> 01:27:54,268
You were trying to
say that all along
1836
01:27:54,270 --> 01:27:59,773
because we are just destined to
repeat the mistakes of the past,
1837
01:27:59,775 --> 01:28:02,409
you know.
1838
01:28:02,411 --> 01:28:04,044
The byzantine empire,
the Roman empire,
1839
01:28:04,046 --> 01:28:06,413
the ottoman empire,
they all fell
1840
01:28:06,415 --> 01:28:09,349
and our empire's
going to fall too.
1841
01:28:09,351 --> 01:28:11,318
One day,
it's going to collapse, boom,
1842
01:28:11,320 --> 01:28:14,721
although they built
another one in its place,
1843
01:28:14,723 --> 01:28:18,458
there's still going to be
something missing, you know.
1844
01:28:18,460 --> 01:28:20,060
Face it.
1845
01:28:20,062 --> 01:28:24,431
We're pretty much fucked!
1846
01:28:27,535 --> 01:28:32,039
Anyway, rain.
Please, read your paper.
1847
01:28:32,041 --> 01:28:33,707
Everyone's listening.
1848
01:28:34,041 --> 01:28:35,707
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