Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:03,665
âMmm.
2
00:00:03,704 --> 00:00:06,074
âListen, Max.
âHm?
3
00:00:06,106 --> 00:00:07,506
âEver since we got
back together,
4
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:10,511
thereâs a question I feel
like I have to ask you.
5
00:00:10,544 --> 00:00:11,984
âSure. Anything?
6
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:14,382
âDid we get better at this?
7
00:00:14,414 --> 00:00:16,824
âWell, we have to give
a little bit of credit
8
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,090
to that performance enhancer
you gave me.
9
00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:22,189
This knee brace
is a gameâchanger.
10
00:00:22,222 --> 00:00:25,092
âAlright, got to go get
ready for Halloween.
11
00:00:25,125 --> 00:00:27,555
Though, what we did was a treat
and involved a few tricks.
12
00:00:27,594 --> 00:00:29,504
âMm.
13
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,330
Maybe we should just
blow off the costume.
14
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:32,975
I mean, you already are
a sexy nurse.
15
00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:34,470
âHey, thatâs demeaning.
16
00:00:34,501 --> 00:00:37,901
Sexy nurse practitioner.
17
00:00:37,938 --> 00:00:39,838
But weâre doing the costumes.
18
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,313
âI canât wait. Ooh!
19
00:00:41,341 --> 00:00:43,611
But before you go,
there is something
20
00:00:43,644 --> 00:00:45,354
I want to give you.
21
00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:50,382
In the shower.
22
00:00:54,187 --> 00:00:57,017
âGod bless that knee brace.
23
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,457
ââȘ This is it
24
00:00:58,492 --> 00:00:59,862
âȘ Oh, oh, oh, whoa
25
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,933
âȘ One day at a time
26
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:08,469
âOh, good!
You are going out for Halloween.
27
00:01:08,502 --> 00:01:09,672
âMmâhmm.
28
00:01:09,703 --> 00:01:11,403
Iâm climate change activist
Greta Thunberg,
29
00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:15,608
and Syd is a melting iceberg
because youâre too hot.
30
00:01:15,642 --> 00:01:17,282
âOh!
31
00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:19,981
âWeâre Thunberg and iceberg!
32
00:01:20,013 --> 00:01:22,883
âWhy canât you just be cats?
33
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:26,116
Youâre already got the whiskers.
34
00:01:26,153 --> 00:01:27,693
âWell, we are not going
trickâorâtreating.
35
00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:29,691
We are going door to door
to collect signatures
36
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,723
and inform people
about manâmade climate change.
37
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:35,158
âOh, shouldnât we say
personâmade climate change?
38
00:01:35,195 --> 00:01:38,725
âIâm good with men taking
the credit for this one.
39
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:40,465
âHalloween is the perfect night
40
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:43,300
because suckers will
open the door for anybody.
41
00:01:43,337 --> 00:01:44,867
âOh, yeah.
You ring the doorbell,
42
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:46,045
and before they even know
whatâs happening,
43
00:01:46,073 --> 00:01:47,613
we hit them with the facts.
44
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:51,911
âBam! Damage will be
irreversible by 2030.
45
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:55,515
âBam! Welcome to
the insect apocalypse.
46
00:01:55,549 --> 00:02:00,849
âBam! That is the sound of
a door slamming in your face.
47
00:02:00,887 --> 00:02:02,257
Put this outside.
48
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:03,759
âUgh, with that bobo
in the White House,
49
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:06,530
I canât stand to look
at an orange face right now.
50
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:07,560
âHeâs like a pumpkin.
51
00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:10,004
He will get thrown out
in November.
52
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:19,638
âWell, guess what we are?
53
00:02:19,673 --> 00:02:23,743
âA reminder to shave my legs?
54
00:02:23,777 --> 00:02:25,777
âNo! Come on!
55
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:28,352
This is serious!
56
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:31,152
âItâs okay, babe.
They just ââ They need a hint.
57
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,525
âOkay, okay.
58
00:02:36,556 --> 00:02:40,886
You are a cow, and you
have stepped in the cow caca.
59
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:43,797
âGoat yoga!
60
00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:45,370
Goâoâoâoat.
61
00:02:45,399 --> 00:02:46,529
Yoga.
62
00:02:46,566 --> 00:02:48,096
Obviously!
63
00:02:48,135 --> 00:02:50,645
Ugh, weâre never gonna win.
64
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,411
âHeâs got a lot riding
on winning tonightâs
65
00:02:52,439 --> 00:02:55,509
Halloween costume contest
at the Echo Park country club.
66
00:02:55,542 --> 00:02:57,412
âWe have a country club
in Echo Park?
67
00:02:57,444 --> 00:02:59,314
âOh, no, itâs the Beverly Hills
Country Club.
68
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:00,976
They just call it
Echo Park on Halloween
69
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:04,054
to make it sound scary.
70
00:03:04,084 --> 00:03:05,454
âIâve never won.
71
00:03:05,485 --> 00:03:07,515
But this year, I canât lose
because I have
72
00:03:07,554 --> 00:03:08,994
Avery in my life,
73
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,522
and Iâm finally
in a loving relationship.
74
00:03:11,558 --> 00:03:12,558
âAww.
75
00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:14,662
âAnd coupleâs costumes
always win!
76
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:17,565
The prize is an iPad mini,
and I never win anything.
77
00:03:17,597 --> 00:03:19,867
âYouâre a rich, straight,
cisgender white dude.
78
00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:22,870
You won at life.
79
00:03:22,903 --> 00:03:25,073
âBut I want an iPad mini.
80
00:03:27,641 --> 00:03:28,911
âOoh! Hey!
81
00:03:28,942 --> 00:03:32,052
What are you, Little Bo Peep
and a messedâup sheep?
82
00:03:35,615 --> 00:03:37,815
âCome on.
Letâs go back to our apartment.
83
00:03:37,851 --> 00:03:40,621
âOh!
Itâs a Halloween miracle.
84
00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:42,564
âA hardyâhar, harâharâhar!
85
00:03:44,357 --> 00:03:45,787
âMom, weâre gonna go now.
86
00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:47,286
âOoh!
You two look great.
87
00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:48,627
This is a lot better
than last yearâs
88
00:03:48,662 --> 00:03:51,662
toxic drinking water
and tumor costumes.
89
00:03:51,698 --> 00:03:52,998
âYeah.
90
00:03:53,033 --> 00:03:56,443
We really bummed out
that senior center.
91
00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:58,140
âByeâbye.
92
00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:01,071
âLupita, you look so happy.
93
00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:02,808
Did you enjoy your walk?
94
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,913
âWalk?
âOf shame!
95
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:09,616
I know you were with Max
doing hankyâpanky
96
00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:13,789
when you needed to be here
doing trickyâtreaty.
97
00:04:13,820 --> 00:04:15,390
âMami, I donât know
what youâre talking about.
98
00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:18,092
We were knitting sweaters
and reading the Bible.
99
00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:20,695
âWhat is wrong with you?
100
00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:24,127
I would have broken him down
like a cardboard box.
101
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,100
Put this outside.
102
00:04:28,135 --> 00:04:30,205
âOkay, Iâll do that.
103
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:36,240
Hey, take it somewhere else,
you old creep!
104
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:38,136
âOh! Hey, Mom.
105
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,020
âWhoa!
106
00:04:42,048 --> 00:04:43,678
Look at that hair!
107
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:44,847
Whatâs your costume?
108
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:47,395
Anderson Cooper, Billy Idol,
Steve Martin?
109
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:50,790
âI donât know who
any of those people are.
110
00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,964
âDoesnât he look like
he could be in a boy band?
111
00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:56,663
âYeah, Boyz II Old Men.
112
00:04:56,696 --> 00:04:58,596
âMom, wait.
This isnât my costume.
113
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,702
I dyed my hair.
114
00:05:00,734 --> 00:05:02,444
âLike, permanently?
115
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:04,839
How could you do that
without asking me?
116
00:05:04,871 --> 00:05:06,411
âI did ask you.
117
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:09,809
I said, "Mom, on Halloween,
can I dye my hair silver?"
118
00:05:09,843 --> 00:05:11,783
âWhy would you use Halloween
in that sentence?
119
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,552
That is so misleading.
120
00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:16,181
â[ Gasps ]
121
00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:19,786
Papito, what have you done?
122
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:21,820
âMmâhmm.
123
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:24,925
âYou look just like your abuelo.
124
00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:27,488
[ Chuckles ]
125
00:05:27,527 --> 00:05:32,067
Tonight, I will put you in
his suit, and we will dance.
126
00:05:32,098 --> 00:05:35,968
âOh, Iâve made a big mistake.
127
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,542
âYeah, you did.
128
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:39,141
Weâll talk about it later
when you get back
129
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:40,342
from trickâorâtreating.
130
00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:42,743
âUh, yeah,
I think Iâm over that.
131
00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:44,906
âWait, so youâre doing
trickâorâtreating?
132
00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:47,485
Was last year your last year?
Why didnât you tell me?
133
00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,424
âHow could I tell you last year
was the last year
134
00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:52,389
if I didnât know
until this year?
135
00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:55,789
âWell, youâre a wise old man,
figure it out.
136
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:56,922
âIâm sorry.
137
00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:58,187
But can I please go to Noraâs?
138
00:05:58,225 --> 00:05:59,565
Her parents are having a party.
139
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:01,133
âDonât worry,
heâll be home in time
140
00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:02,601
to take his arthritis pills.
141
00:06:02,629 --> 00:06:05,329
âOoh!
Thatâs a good one.
142
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,995
Yes, you can go to Noraâs house.
143
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:10,473
But make sure youâre home in
time to spoon your grandmother.
144
00:06:13,807 --> 00:06:15,377
Bye, papito!
145
00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:18,638
[ Cellphone rings ]
146
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:22,825
Hello, Max.
147
00:06:22,849 --> 00:06:25,649
What are you wearing?
148
00:06:25,685 --> 00:06:27,415
âRubber.
149
00:06:27,454 --> 00:06:29,394
But not in a fun way.
150
00:06:29,422 --> 00:06:31,462
Just got done
cleaning my bathroom.
151
00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,628
âOh!
152
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,633
âWell, I canât wait to see you.
153
00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:45,198
âPregnancy test?
154
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,568
âOh, I canât wait to see you,
too.
155
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,266
I was just about to head over.
156
00:06:48,308 --> 00:06:50,278
Are you sure you have
enough candy?
157
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:54,110
âCompletely sure, positive.
158
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:55,817
âI can stop.
159
00:06:55,849 --> 00:06:58,249
âIâve been through this
a couple times before.
160
00:06:58,285 --> 00:06:59,655
100% sure.
161
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,594
âYou want to come over here
162
00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,322
instead of handing out candy
all night?
163
00:07:04,357 --> 00:07:05,787
âWhat am I supposed to do,
leave it in a basket
164
00:07:05,825 --> 00:07:08,385
outside the door
and hope someone takes it?
165
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,871
Thatâs not how I was raised.
166
00:07:12,899 --> 00:07:14,869
âEso!
167
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,071
âWhat, Mami?
168
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:18,442
âQueso!
169
00:07:18,471 --> 00:07:21,171
Itâs Spanish for "cheese."
170
00:07:21,207 --> 00:07:23,737
Saved it.
171
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:28,983
âHeh!
172
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:34,091
[ Both humming ]
173
00:07:34,921 --> 00:07:36,921
[ Both laugh ]
174
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:40,657
âOh, I got to admit, "Grease"
was a great costume idea.
175
00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:44,164
âRight?
Because we go together.
176
00:07:44,197 --> 00:07:46,027
âIs it weird that
Iâm really attracted to you
177
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:49,196
even though youâre technically
dressed as a highâschool girl?
178
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:53,205
âNah. Every teen in that movie
was pushing 40.
179
00:07:53,239 --> 00:07:57,679
Instead of zits, they were
worried about liver spots.
180
00:07:57,711 --> 00:08:01,111
âPresenting
the House of Schneider!
181
00:08:04,617 --> 00:08:08,717
âServing Halloween Extravaganza
realness.
182
00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:15,596
Well, do you get it?
183
00:08:15,628 --> 00:08:17,758
âDrag...race.
184
00:08:17,797 --> 00:08:19,897
Youâre drag race.
âYes!
185
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:21,373
Thank you!
186
00:08:21,401 --> 00:08:23,571
I mean, itâs really more
of a history lesson in heels.
187
00:08:23,603 --> 00:08:28,573
The full title is "Drag Race ââ
A Drag Queen Started Stonewall."
188
00:08:29,809 --> 00:08:32,039
âOh, "Drag Race." Thatâs cute.
189
00:08:32,078 --> 00:08:35,278
âOh, no, donât say that.
190
00:08:35,315 --> 00:08:36,725
âCute?
191
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:40,790
Do you think I tucked
and taped for cute?
192
00:08:40,820 --> 00:08:42,120
âYouâre in a dress.
193
00:08:42,155 --> 00:08:44,765
I think you tucked and taped
for nothing.
194
00:08:44,791 --> 00:08:46,791
âCuteâs for losers.
195
00:08:46,826 --> 00:08:49,496
Last year, I went as
the "Hang in There" cat.
196
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:52,804
Nothing.
197
00:08:52,832 --> 00:08:54,632
I almost gave up for good,
and then I looked in the mirror,
198
00:08:54,667 --> 00:08:57,067
and something inspired me
to keep going.
199
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:01,512
Anyway, back
to the drawing board.
200
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:06,454
âHe actually draws on a board.
201
00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:07,509
Stick figures.
202
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:10,447
Itâs very sad.
203
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:12,393
I can fix him.
204
00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:15,589
[ Door closes ]
205
00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:17,362
âSheâs a lucky woman.
âYeah.
206
00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,930
Alright, now itâs time
for a little summer lovinâ,
207
00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:21,929
and, by summer, I mean, October,
and by lovinâ,
208
00:09:21,961 --> 00:09:24,601
I mean wine.
[ Knock on door ]
209
00:09:24,631 --> 00:09:26,471
[ Pounding on door ]
210
00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:27,969
âOoh! Candy duty calls!
211
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:29,471
âOoh, our first
trickâorâtreaters.
212
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:32,612
I love seeing those
little cuties all dressed up!
213
00:09:36,843 --> 00:09:40,413
âThe Beast is here!
214
00:09:40,447 --> 00:09:42,677
âSo is the Beauty!
215
00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:46,288
âWow!
216
00:09:46,319 --> 00:09:47,519
Beauty and the Beast!
217
00:09:47,554 --> 00:09:49,864
You guys did a coupleâs costume,
too!
218
00:09:49,889 --> 00:09:52,729
âThey were a couple?
219
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,829
I never saw the movie.
220
00:09:54,861 --> 00:09:56,701
I thought it was about
a beautiful woman
221
00:09:56,729 --> 00:09:59,329
and her pet dog in a tuxedo.
222
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:04,901
Leslie, may I see you
in the kitchen?
223
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:05,868
âOh!
224
00:10:05,905 --> 00:10:08,235
Shall I be your guest?
225
00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:11,783
âWhy are you being weird?
226
00:10:11,811 --> 00:10:13,711
Get in the kitchen!
227
00:10:22,188 --> 00:10:24,918
Look.
228
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:38,802
âI donât know who the father is,
but, I assure you,
229
00:10:38,838 --> 00:10:42,208
I will raise this baby
as my own.
230
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:43,282
âNo, Leslie.
231
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,709
It is not my baby!
232
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:47,714
âOh, thank God.
I canât raise a baby.
233
00:10:48,915 --> 00:10:53,695
I ââ I canât even get up
off of this knee.
234
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,760
Maybe I should try one of
those knee braces
235
00:10:55,788 --> 00:10:58,918
Penelopeâs raving about at work.
236
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:02,528
âPenelope is pregnant.
237
00:11:02,562 --> 00:11:05,832
âDios mio!
238
00:11:05,865 --> 00:11:08,225
Does Max know about this?
239
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:11,638
âI think that is what they are
talking about right now.
240
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,811
They deserve privacy.
241
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:18,110
Theyâre not gonna get it,
but they deserve it.
242
00:11:18,144 --> 00:11:20,314
âWait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
243
00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:22,646
Okay. What should we hit them
with first?
244
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:25,922
How rising sea levels will
destroy coastal communities,
245
00:11:25,952 --> 00:11:27,322
or the coming political chaos
246
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:30,093
caused by widespread
food insecurity?
247
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:33,493
âTheyâre both so inevitable.
248
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:36,396
Okay. You decide,
and Iâll use what I learned
249
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:40,799
from my summer improv course
to "Yes, and" whatever you say.
250
00:11:41,634 --> 00:11:43,444
âOkay.
251
00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:48,669
âOoh, ooh, ooh!
252
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:53,248
Anna and Olaf from "Frozen"!
253
00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:54,409
âWhat? No, no, no.
254
00:11:54,447 --> 00:11:56,117
Weâre not from "Frozen."
255
00:11:56,149 --> 00:12:00,819
âYes, and whatâs not frozen
is the Arctic!
256
00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:03,263
âSo cute.
Two pieces of candy each!
257
00:12:03,289 --> 00:12:05,759
âOh! Thank you, but we actually
are here because ââ
258
00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:07,392
[ Both speaking indistinctly ]
259
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:10,027
âWe need a ââ
260
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:14,028
He totally didnât realize
that our costumes
261
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,767
are making
a radical political statement.
262
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:19,473
âHe just thought
we were adorable.
263
00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:22,705
â[ Scoffs ] Men.
264
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:25,952
Okay, well, letâs not panic
265
00:12:25,979 --> 00:12:29,779
because we can get it right
on this one.
266
00:12:34,287 --> 00:12:37,257
Hi. Weâre here to talk
about climate ââ
267
00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:38,920
âOh, my stars!
268
00:12:38,958 --> 00:12:43,198
What very clever
and timely costumes.
269
00:12:43,229 --> 00:12:44,599
âThank you!
270
00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:47,131
âDorothy and the tornado!
271
00:12:49,469 --> 00:12:51,939
âWe really didnât
think this through.
272
00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,271
âWell, here we go.
273
00:12:53,306 --> 00:12:55,506
âOh, uh, thank you so much,
but, actually ââ
274
00:12:55,541 --> 00:12:57,911
âWe wanted to talk to you
about climate change!
275
00:13:02,915 --> 00:13:04,845
What is going on?
276
00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:06,994
âIâll tell you whatâs going on.
277
00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:09,420
Fullâsize candy bars!
278
00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:10,585
Letâs try the next door.
279
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,193
âOh, to see if theyâll sign
the petition.
280
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:15,135
âNo, to see
if they have Snickers.
281
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:17,631
âYes, and maybe Twix?
282
00:13:17,664 --> 00:13:20,534
âYes.
283
00:13:20,566 --> 00:13:22,066
âAlright, Iâm calling it.
284
00:13:22,101 --> 00:13:24,201
Once the 30âyearâold Spongebob
comes around,
285
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:27,537
itâs time to close up shop.
286
00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:29,183
âWell, we did it.
âYes!
287
00:13:29,208 --> 00:13:32,008
âThanks for having me over.
This was fun.
288
00:13:32,045 --> 00:13:34,515
âWell, when Alex said
he was done trickâorâtreating,
289
00:13:34,547 --> 00:13:38,817
I realized a part of my life
was ending, but...
290
00:13:38,851 --> 00:13:40,921
I guess another part
is beginning.
291
00:13:43,122 --> 00:13:45,692
âSounds like we should
make a toast.
292
00:13:45,725 --> 00:13:47,095
âYes.
293
00:13:47,126 --> 00:13:48,826
To new beginnings!
294
00:13:48,861 --> 00:13:51,461
âChardonnay is not for babies!
295
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,567
âWhat?
296
00:13:56,602 --> 00:13:58,502
What is happening?
297
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:00,568
âYou are pregnant.
298
00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:02,106
âYouâre pregnant?
299
00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:05,411
âNo!
âWell, how do you explain this?
300
00:14:05,445 --> 00:14:06,785
âHow do you explain this?
301
00:14:06,813 --> 00:14:08,783
âUm, itâs not mine.
Iâm not pregnant.
302
00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:10,325
âSo nobodyâs pregnant?
303
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:14,390
âSomebody is pregnant,
according to the trash.
304
00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:15,520
âHold on.
305
00:14:15,555 --> 00:14:17,925
You found a pregnancy test
in our trash can?
306
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:19,827
âWell, if itâs not yours,
then...
307
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:20,989
[ Gasps ]
308
00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:23,397
Oh, could it be Elenaâs?
309
00:14:25,131 --> 00:14:27,931
Do you think she fell off
the wagon?
310
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:37,578
âNo, she really loves
that wagon.
311
00:14:41,948 --> 00:14:43,918
Which means it could only be...
312
00:14:46,152 --> 00:14:48,322
âI think the only one ââ
âAlex, yes!
313
00:14:48,354 --> 00:14:49,924
I know, Doc!
314
00:14:56,963 --> 00:14:58,903
[ Doorbell rings ]
315
00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:00,471
â[ Breathes sharply ]
316
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:03,972
âOkay, let me guess.
317
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:07,013
The "kids" are in the car.
318
00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:08,709
âNo, no, no. Melba, hi.
319
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,041
Soy Penelope Alvarez,
le mama de Alex.
320
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:12,477
Weâve spoken on the phone
a couple times.
321
00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:14,252
Itâs so nice to meet you
in person.
322
00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:16,220
âHi, Penelope.
Que gusto conocerte.
323
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:19,349
Este es mi esposo, RamĂłn.
324
00:15:19,385 --> 00:15:21,515
âHola, RamĂłn. Como estas?
325
00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:22,554
This is my boyfriend.
326
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:24,318
âMe llamo es Max.
327
00:15:26,058 --> 00:15:27,258
âNo, donât do that right now.
328
00:15:27,293 --> 00:15:31,463
Hi! Que bonita tu casa.
329
00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:33,997
PerdĂłn, tengo que hablar
con Alejandro.
330
00:15:34,033 --> 00:15:35,033
Alex!
331
00:15:35,067 --> 00:15:37,367
Get out here right now!
332
00:15:37,403 --> 00:15:39,813
Ustedes son de Puerto Rico?
333
00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:41,409
âSĂ. CĂłmo sabĂas?
334
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,541
âQue me encanta ese acento.
335
00:15:43,576 --> 00:15:45,136
âAy, gracias.
336
00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,548
âWhat are you doing here?
337
00:15:46,579 --> 00:15:49,819
Why are you dressed
like an old biker dude?
338
00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,249
âI am Sandy from "Grease."
339
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:52,924
You donât know who that is,
either.
340
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,122
Look.
341
00:15:54,153 --> 00:15:56,423
We need to talk about this.
342
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,426
âAnd we would love to be part
of that conversation.
343
00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:00,659
Norita!
344
00:16:00,693 --> 00:16:02,093
[ Speaking Spanish ]
345
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:03,728
Sheâll be out in a minute.
346
00:16:03,763 --> 00:16:05,563
âWhy are you showing me
a pregnancy test?
347
00:16:05,598 --> 00:16:08,698
âDonât give me that crap,
you silver fox.
348
00:16:08,734 --> 00:16:10,674
We found this at home.
âSĂ, Mami?
349
00:16:10,703 --> 00:16:14,243
âNorita, what were you doing
at Alexâs house today?
350
00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:15,513
âWhat? Nothing.
351
00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:17,111
âWell, then somebody
explain this.
352
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,713
âItâs not ours.
353
00:16:18,744 --> 00:16:20,214
âAlex, we found it in the trash.
354
00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:22,576
Itâs not mine, no Abuelitaâs,
not Elenaâs.
355
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:24,785
How is it not yours?
âBecause itâs not, all right?
356
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,087
What other explanation is there?
357
00:16:26,118 --> 00:16:28,048
âItâs impossible!
358
00:16:29,856 --> 00:16:32,116
We havenât had sex, okay?
359
00:16:36,629 --> 00:16:38,129
âReally?
360
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:40,074
Look at me.
361
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:44,575
No sex at all?
362
00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,844
âOh, my God! No sex.
363
00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:48,713
âJust over the shirt stuff!
364
00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:53,450
You probably didnât need
that information.
365
00:16:53,479 --> 00:16:56,349
âCan we all stop talking
about this now, please?
366
00:16:57,183 --> 00:17:00,693
âYeah. Ooh!
367
00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:05,190
What a memorable first meeting,
huh, Melba?
368
00:17:05,224 --> 00:17:06,434
Iâm glad we figured this out
369
00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:09,159
without too much
embarrassment, right?
370
00:17:09,195 --> 00:17:10,865
Mucho gusto.
371
00:17:10,897 --> 00:17:12,097
âSĂ.
372
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:13,401
âSĂ, mucho Halloween!
373
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:14,502
âHey!
374
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:17,104
âSorry!
I took German in high school.
375
00:17:18,804 --> 00:17:21,614
âI thought you were out
doing a political crusade.
376
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:24,381
âOh, we tried, believe me,
but sometimes you dress up
377
00:17:24,410 --> 00:17:26,110
to discuss the coming
global disaster,
378
00:17:26,145 --> 00:17:27,845
but people think
youâre the Swiss Miss girl
379
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:29,820
and mashed potatoes.
380
00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:32,179
But thatâs okay because
this is gonna give us
381
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,648
so much energy
to fight harder tomorrow!
382
00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:39,989
Yeah.
âWho knew Halloween was fun?
383
00:17:40,026 --> 00:17:42,556
âLiterally everybody.
384
00:17:46,198 --> 00:17:49,998
âElena, is there any way
385
00:17:50,036 --> 00:17:54,136
this positive pregnancy test
is yours?
386
00:17:56,175 --> 00:17:58,605
âHow many times do you
want me to come out?
387
00:18:02,715 --> 00:18:05,885
You do know you need a man
for that, right?
388
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:10,088
âExcuse me, I think the
Virgin Mary would clap back.
389
00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:17,734
âAlright, well,
Iâm not pregnant.
390
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:20,433
âOh! For a second,
they had me convinced.
391
00:18:20,466 --> 00:18:22,766
I mean, you are a saint.
392
00:18:24,737 --> 00:18:26,307
âWell, this has to belong
to someone.
393
00:18:26,339 --> 00:18:28,609
It didnât just appear by magic.
394
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:35,050
âOh, my God!
395
00:18:35,081 --> 00:18:37,821
âWhoo!
âNo!
396
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,020
Donât compliment us.
397
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,051
We came in second.
398
00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:42,446
We lost to Elton John!
399
00:18:42,488 --> 00:18:45,218
âOh, who was dressed
like Elton John?
400
00:18:45,257 --> 00:18:49,457
âNo, we lost to Elton John,
401
00:18:49,495 --> 00:18:52,225
who was dressed as Garfield
eating lasagna.
402
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:54,204
It was adorable!
403
00:18:59,105 --> 00:19:02,675
âWhere did you find that?
404
00:19:02,708 --> 00:19:04,408
âIs this yours?
405
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:15,186
âCongratulations!
406
00:19:15,221 --> 00:19:16,361
âLovely!
407
00:19:16,389 --> 00:19:18,159
âWhy are you congratulating her?
408
00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:20,360
I told you, we lost!
409
00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:23,628
Hey.
410
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,363
Donât cry.
411
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,168
Hang in there.
412
00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:34,044
âOkay.
413
00:19:34,073 --> 00:19:37,283
Well, I didnât think
Iâd be telling you like this.
414
00:19:37,309 --> 00:19:38,709
Thatâs why I put it
in their trash
415
00:19:38,744 --> 00:19:41,814
because I wasnât sure
how youâd react.
416
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:44,447
Well, I mean, itâs not like
we planned this.
417
00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:49,246
âSo what are you saying?
418
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:53,928
âIâm pregnant.
419
00:19:59,632 --> 00:20:01,432
So, does this mean youâre happy?
420
00:20:01,467 --> 00:20:02,567
âYes!
421
00:20:02,601 --> 00:20:04,341
Are you?
422
00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:05,440
âYeah.
423
00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:07,941
[ Laughs ]
424
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:17,719
âThis is so much better
than an iPad mini.
425
00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:22,090
âOh!
Congratulations, you two!
426
00:20:22,121 --> 00:20:25,661
âOh, yes, and we are here
for you if you need us.
427
00:20:25,691 --> 00:20:29,061
And you will.
428
00:20:29,095 --> 00:20:30,735
âIâm gonna be a tĂo.
429
00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:32,163
âIâm gonna be a tĂa.
430
00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:35,368
âIâm gonna be a tĂâx!
431
00:20:35,401 --> 00:20:38,041
âWell, this calls
for a celebration.
432
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,610
Hey, Grandpa.
433
00:20:39,638 --> 00:20:42,038
Will you take us all out
for ice cream?
434
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:44,983
Letâs keep the hair.
435
00:20:45,010 --> 00:20:48,480
Itâs silver,
but the jokes are gold.
436
00:20:48,514 --> 00:20:57,824
âȘ
437
00:20:57,857 --> 00:21:07,367
âȘ
29398
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.