All language subtitles for Gortimer Gibbons Life On Normal Street S02E20 Gortimer vs the Worlds Best Mom 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 H 264-DarkSaber_track3_[eng]
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1
00:00:07,485 --> 00:00:10,010
Gortimer, narrating:
I've lived my whole life
on Normal Street.
2
00:00:10,097 --> 00:00:12,012
There's a lake at one end
3
00:00:12,099 --> 00:00:14,318
and a forest of shady trees
at the other.
4
00:00:14,405 --> 00:00:16,973
But what lies in between
5
00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:19,149
is anything but normal.
6
00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:27,810
It's human nature
to want to take care
7
00:00:27,897 --> 00:00:29,246
of the people around us.
8
00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:31,031
We try to do all we can
9
00:00:31,118 --> 00:00:33,120
to make their lives
as complete as possible.
10
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:37,994
But we can't do everything.
11
00:00:38,081 --> 00:00:40,823
And sometimes,
the more we try to do,
12
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:43,130
the less we actually achieve.
13
00:00:47,656 --> 00:00:49,658
Right. Mm-hmm.
14
00:00:49,745 --> 00:00:51,616
Oh. Of course.
15
00:00:51,703 --> 00:00:54,445
There's an incredibly strong
narrative voice here.
16
00:00:54,532 --> 00:00:55,751
- Right.
- [humming]
17
00:00:55,838 --> 00:00:57,231
Well, the issues that I see
18
00:00:57,318 --> 00:01:00,408
have mostly to do
with, um, with pacing
19
00:01:00,495 --> 00:01:02,192
in the later chapters. Right.
20
00:01:02,279 --> 00:01:03,802
And making sure
the ambiguous resolve--
21
00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:07,067
which, by the way, I love--
22
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:08,329
- is fully earned.
- Mommy, look.
23
00:01:08,416 --> 00:01:09,591
Mommy, look.
24
00:01:09,678 --> 00:01:13,029
[chanting]
Mommy. Mommy. Mommy.
25
00:01:13,116 --> 00:01:14,813
- Mommy.
- For sure.
26
00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:17,512
- Mommy.
- Hey, Mom, where's
my cactus shirt?
27
00:01:17,599 --> 00:01:20,297
That sounds great.
I look forward
to working with you, too.
28
00:01:20,384 --> 00:01:21,690
Bye-bye.
29
00:01:23,257 --> 00:01:24,736
Could you just, please?
30
00:01:25,824 --> 00:01:26,825
Okay.
31
00:01:26,912 --> 00:01:28,349
What is the rule
32
00:01:28,436 --> 00:01:30,002
when Mommy's on the phone?
33
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,569
- That goes for you, too.
- Sorry.
34
00:01:31,656 --> 00:01:33,354
- Was that?
- It was.
35
00:01:33,441 --> 00:01:35,225
- And?
- I got it.
36
00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:36,748
No! My mom's
going to be working
37
00:01:36,835 --> 00:01:38,010
with a bestselling author!
38
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,273
You're amazing.
39
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:40,970
Well, okay it is only
on a trial basis.
40
00:01:41,057 --> 00:01:43,755
I have one week to finish
my notes on his manuscript.
41
00:01:43,842 --> 00:01:45,975
If he likes my work,
we'll make it official.
42
00:01:46,062 --> 00:01:47,542
Of course he's going
to like your work.
43
00:01:47,629 --> 00:01:49,587
Fingers crossed.
That does mean
44
00:01:49,674 --> 00:01:52,024
I will have no social life
for the next week.
45
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,896
Oh, Adam
is going to be so bummed.
46
00:01:53,983 --> 00:01:55,767
We were supposed to go
to that jazz festival.
47
00:01:55,854 --> 00:01:56,768
Ow.
48
00:01:56,855 --> 00:01:58,030
What is it?
49
00:01:59,945 --> 00:02:02,644
Ooh. Looks
like a little splinter.
50
00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:03,949
How did you get that?
51
00:02:04,036 --> 00:02:05,864
Here, let me get
my-- my tweezers.
52
00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:08,258
- Where did I put them?
- [oven bell dings]
53
00:02:08,345 --> 00:02:09,303
Oh.
54
00:02:12,784 --> 00:02:13,785
Ooh.
55
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:15,396
Is it a special occasion?
56
00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:16,745
Only the bake sale
you and Ranger
57
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:18,050
have been talking about
all month.
58
00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,748
For the animal shelter.
59
00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,010
Yes. Did you forget?
60
00:02:22,838 --> 00:02:24,840
What? What's wrong?
61
00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:27,147
No. Nothing. It's just
the bake sale's next week.
62
00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:28,583
But-- But that's okay.
63
00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:30,411
I'm sure the cake will
be just as good then.
64
00:02:30,498 --> 00:02:33,153
Probably better. Besides,
it's for homeless animals.
65
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:34,893
- Who's going to complain?
- Gortimer, stop, please.
66
00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:37,331
It's fine. I'll just--
I'll make another one.
67
00:02:37,418 --> 00:02:39,159
Oh, no, no, no.
We're late for preschool.
68
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:40,421
Come on, buddy. Let's go.
69
00:02:40,508 --> 00:02:41,422
Oh. Bye, guys.
70
00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:42,771
- Bye.
- See you soon.
71
00:02:43,989 --> 00:02:45,774
Come on, sweetie. Let's go.
72
00:02:45,861 --> 00:02:47,036
Ow.
73
00:02:47,123 --> 00:02:48,690
Oh. Oh, no. Your splinter.
74
00:02:48,777 --> 00:02:51,040
Sorry, honey. Come on.
75
00:02:51,127 --> 00:02:53,390
Don't wanna go.
76
00:02:56,088 --> 00:02:59,222
Sorry. I'm late.
77
00:02:59,309 --> 00:03:02,138
Crazy morning, and then there
was lane close on Topeka--
78
00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:04,314
It's so hard
to get out of the door
with the little ones.
79
00:03:04,401 --> 00:03:05,228
Yeah.
80
00:03:05,315 --> 00:03:08,057
Even with these guys
dressing themselves.
81
00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:19,460
Oh, uh, before I forget,
would you like to sign up
82
00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:22,245
for the Mommy and Me
pickling class this Tuesday?
83
00:03:22,332 --> 00:03:24,552
The kids love it because
you get to eat your project.
84
00:03:24,639 --> 00:03:28,382
Oh, how fun. Do you happen
to have a weekend class?
85
00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:30,079
It's just because
of work and everything.
86
00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:31,515
Oh. We found
a lot of people
87
00:03:31,602 --> 00:03:33,300
were having family time
on the weekends,
88
00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:35,171
so there wasn't
enough interest.
89
00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:36,520
I'm sorry.
90
00:03:36,607 --> 00:03:38,435
Uh, it's fine.
91
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:41,656
Are you staying for
the circle sing-along?
92
00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:47,314
Oh, uh, I wish I could.
I just--
93
00:03:48,445 --> 00:03:50,578
Uh, have a great day.
94
00:03:50,665 --> 00:03:51,840
Okay, buddy?
95
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:52,841
I love you.
96
00:03:52,928 --> 00:03:53,929
Bye, Mom.
97
00:03:54,016 --> 00:03:55,104
Come on, little buddy.
98
00:03:55,191 --> 00:03:56,148
Let's blow bubbles.
99
00:03:59,151 --> 00:04:00,979
Everyone wants
puppies and kittens,
100
00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:03,547
but people discriminate
against older animals.
101
00:04:03,634 --> 00:04:05,375
I had no idea
they had it that bad.
102
00:04:05,462 --> 00:04:06,985
Yeah. It's a problem.
103
00:04:07,072 --> 00:04:09,205
But you know,
I'm starting to see myself
104
00:04:09,292 --> 00:04:10,815
as a champion
for the underdog.
105
00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,817
See you.
106
00:04:12,904 --> 00:04:14,297
Bye, Ranger.
107
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:15,342
See you.
108
00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:17,779
[yawn]
109
00:04:17,866 --> 00:04:19,215
[door closes]
110
00:04:19,302 --> 00:04:20,738
Long day?
111
00:04:20,825 --> 00:04:23,915
Oh, yeah.
And it isn't over yet.
112
00:04:24,002 --> 00:04:26,004
Come on, buddy.
It's time for your bath.
113
00:04:26,091 --> 00:04:28,224
No bath. No bath.
114
00:04:28,311 --> 00:04:30,008
Gardner, don't start this.
115
00:04:30,095 --> 00:04:34,317
[chanting] No bath.
No bath. No bath. No bath.
116
00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:36,145
- Come on.
- I don't want to.
117
00:04:36,232 --> 00:04:37,668
Let's go. [grunt]
118
00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:41,150
I don't want to.
119
00:04:51,116 --> 00:04:53,945
"Call 911 because
you're phoning it in."
120
00:04:54,032 --> 00:04:55,207
[chuckle]
121
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,035
"You do enough to get by,
122
00:04:57,122 --> 00:04:59,081
"but you're easily
overwhelmed.
123
00:04:59,168 --> 00:05:01,562
Mac 'n cheese? Pa-lease."
124
00:05:01,649 --> 00:05:02,780
"Mediocre Mommy"?
125
00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:04,521
Huh.
126
00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:06,523
Who comes up
with this garbage?
127
00:05:08,612 --> 00:05:10,527
She doesn't need
to be reading this.
128
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:17,491
Did you see how high Ella
got when she blocked Julie?
129
00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:19,319
And did you
see her jump serve?
130
00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:20,972
She has crazy hops.
131
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,675
Since when are you wearing
make-up to school?
132
00:05:27,762 --> 00:05:31,113
Ever since these freckles
started invading my face.
133
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,289
Oh. But yours are cute.
134
00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:40,078
I don't get it.
135
00:05:40,165 --> 00:05:41,384
It's meta.
136
00:05:41,471 --> 00:05:42,994
No, I'm pretty sure
it's a bowl.
137
00:05:43,081 --> 00:05:44,213
What do you think of this?
138
00:05:45,780 --> 00:05:46,868
Think she'll like it?
139
00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:48,043
It's your mom's birthday?
140
00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:49,653
No, no.
It's not her birthday.
141
00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:51,394
I just want to do
something special for her.
142
00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:53,527
She's been kind
of overwhelmed lately.
143
00:05:53,614 --> 00:05:56,312
She'll love it, even though
it is very literal.
144
00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:04,320
Cool.
"This is not a bowl."
145
00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:06,453
Meta. Nice.
146
00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:08,672
$6.00.
147
00:06:08,759 --> 00:06:10,500
And 40 bucks.
148
00:06:10,587 --> 00:06:12,023
For a mug?
149
00:06:12,110 --> 00:06:14,330
Yeah. Well, it's part
of our very special
150
00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:16,114
Albanian Matriarch
Collection.
151
00:06:16,201 --> 00:06:18,508
It's, uh, super rare.
152
00:06:21,337 --> 00:06:23,078
The bank of Lake Pogradec
153
00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:25,385
is home to a very fine clay
154
00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:27,735
that only appears
when the moon is full--
155
00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:29,476
[howling]
156
00:06:29,563 --> 00:06:32,957
...and the frogs near
the lake cease their croaking.
157
00:06:33,044 --> 00:06:35,003
The clay is taken to the home
158
00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:36,961
of the oldest woman
in the village,
159
00:06:37,048 --> 00:06:40,182
where it remains
for 70 long years.
160
00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:42,445
At the end of the 70 years,
161
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:45,535
the youngest girl in the
village gathers the clay.
162
00:06:49,452 --> 00:06:52,803
She keeps it
for another 70 years.
163
00:06:52,890 --> 00:06:55,023
- As they wait for--
- Ranger: Another 70 years?
164
00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,372
We don't have time
for this.
165
00:06:56,459 --> 00:06:58,809
Right. Handle with care,
166
00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:00,681
if you know what I mean.
167
00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:13,171
You're up early.
168
00:07:13,258 --> 00:07:14,869
Good morning.
169
00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:17,785
Mexican vanilla latte
for Madame.
170
00:07:17,872 --> 00:07:20,744
[chuckling] Gortimer,
this is so sweet.
171
00:07:20,831 --> 00:07:23,051
Actually,
it's just instant coffee.
172
00:07:23,138 --> 00:07:25,532
"World's Best Mom."
173
00:07:25,619 --> 00:07:27,316
Wait. Did you make this?
174
00:07:27,403 --> 00:07:29,840
Well, I know you've been
kind of busy lately, so--
175
00:07:29,927 --> 00:07:33,453
Mm.
This means a lot to me.
176
00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:35,542
Thank you for being
so thoughtful.
177
00:07:35,629 --> 00:07:37,718
I'm going to go
get ready for school.
178
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:06,224
I made you
whole grain pancakes.
179
00:08:06,311 --> 00:08:09,750
Well, dig in.
You're a growing boy.
180
00:08:14,929 --> 00:08:17,235
Shakespeare's use
of literary devices
181
00:08:17,322 --> 00:08:19,673
was extremely deliberate,
as you can see in--
182
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,022
[bell rings]
183
00:08:21,109 --> 00:08:22,763
We'll pick this up next week.
184
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:24,286
Homework on my desk, please.
185
00:08:29,204 --> 00:08:30,901
Oh, no.
186
00:08:30,988 --> 00:08:31,902
- No, no, no, no.
- What?
187
00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:32,947
My homework.
188
00:08:33,034 --> 00:08:34,252
I left it
on my desk at home.
189
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:36,211
I'm so sunk. Ms. Francis!
190
00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:41,042
I kind of left
my essay at home.
191
00:08:41,129 --> 00:08:42,304
I'm really sorry.
192
00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:44,480
- Oh. I have your essay.
- You do?
193
00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:46,308
Your mom
dropped it off earlier.
194
00:08:46,395 --> 00:08:48,092
She also brought me an apple
195
00:08:48,179 --> 00:08:49,964
and an apple pie.
196
00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,705
She's an inspiration.
197
00:08:53,968 --> 00:08:55,056
That's weird.
198
00:08:55,143 --> 00:08:57,058
Not weird. It's really nice.
199
00:08:57,145 --> 00:08:58,799
You should appreciate
your mother more.
200
00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:05,827
Do these animals
look sad enough?
201
00:09:05,827 --> 00:09:08,417
I mean, we want them
to be pretty sad
202
00:09:08,504 --> 00:09:10,158
so that people buy cakes,
203
00:09:10,245 --> 00:09:11,812
but we don't want them
to look so sad
204
00:09:11,899 --> 00:09:13,596
that the people
lose their appetites.
205
00:09:13,683 --> 00:09:15,076
It is a fine line.
206
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:17,948
This is incredible.
207
00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:19,297
Your comics are organized
208
00:09:19,384 --> 00:09:21,865
by primary and ancillary
superpower.
209
00:09:21,952 --> 00:09:23,998
And that's just
the tip of the iceberg.
Check this out.
210
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:29,394
I don't believe it.
Your socks have been
Roy G. Bivved.
211
00:09:29,481 --> 00:09:32,049
Right? Who knew
I had so much indigo?
212
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:34,399
- Where'd you get that?
- Mel: I love it.
213
00:09:34,486 --> 00:09:36,880
Good, because my mom
made one for each of you.
214
00:09:36,967 --> 00:09:38,665
How does she have
time to do all that?
215
00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,405
Isn't she on a deadline?
216
00:09:40,492 --> 00:09:42,190
I don't know. Ever since
I gave her that mug,
217
00:09:42,277 --> 00:09:44,279
she's been
the world's best mom.
218
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:46,586
Take that, Lady 365.
219
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:48,326
What are you
talking about?
220
00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:49,458
Oh.
221
00:09:57,335 --> 00:10:00,077
[chuckle]
"Mediocre Mommy"?
222
00:10:00,164 --> 00:10:04,473
Wow. Good job
with the positive
reinforcement, Lady 365.
223
00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:07,041
Who even reads this?
224
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:14,875
I'll recycle it for you.
225
00:10:14,962 --> 00:10:16,528
Yoo-hoo!
226
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,662
I made you guys
some seven grain cookies.
227
00:10:20,924 --> 00:10:22,317
Oh. And, Gortimer,
228
00:10:22,404 --> 00:10:24,275
can you remember
to check the chore wheel?
229
00:10:24,362 --> 00:10:26,582
You were supposed to start
a compost pile.
230
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:27,931
We have a chore wheel?
231
00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:29,280
You have a compost pile?
232
00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:32,849
We would if Gortimer
had started one.
233
00:10:32,936 --> 00:10:33,850
[scoff]
234
00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,854
[blender whirring]
235
00:10:40,552 --> 00:10:43,207
Kale, radish, and quinoa.
236
00:10:48,169 --> 00:10:49,910
- [gulp]
- Mm.
237
00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:13,673
What am I going to do?
238
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,500
She went from
the world's best mom
239
00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:17,154
to the world's
most annoying mom.
240
00:11:17,241 --> 00:11:18,765
[knocking]
241
00:11:18,852 --> 00:11:20,680
Hey, guys.
Gortimer, your mom called.
242
00:11:20,767 --> 00:11:23,291
Said to get home right away.
It's "GST"?
243
00:11:24,771 --> 00:11:25,946
What is that?
244
00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:27,599
Gibbon Silent Time.
245
00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,906
She wants all the Gibbons
to meditate together.
246
00:11:29,993 --> 00:11:31,691
She's even got Adam doing it.
247
00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,431
See you later.
248
00:11:33,518 --> 00:11:35,346
Bye, Gortimer.
249
00:11:35,433 --> 00:11:36,783
What are you looking for?
250
00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:38,219
Aha.
251
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:39,263
Lipstick?
252
00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,050
What's going on?
253
00:11:43,137 --> 00:11:44,965
I'm 14,
254
00:11:45,052 --> 00:11:47,141
and the only make-up
I own is from a place
255
00:11:47,228 --> 00:11:48,969
that you guys bought me
three years ago.
256
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,448
Yeah, I'm okay with that.
257
00:11:50,535 --> 00:11:52,799
I have to start
wearing make-up.
258
00:11:52,886 --> 00:11:54,409
I see. You have to.
259
00:11:54,496 --> 00:11:56,585
And who exactly
made that rule?
260
00:11:56,672 --> 00:11:57,717
- [scoff]
- Well,
261
00:11:57,804 --> 00:11:59,675
in any case,
you do wear make-up.
262
00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:01,546
Yeah,
on special occasions,
263
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:03,200
not every day.
264
00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:05,246
I'm tired of looking
like a kid.
265
00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:07,378
But, honey, you are a kid.
266
00:12:07,465 --> 00:12:08,771
You don't get it.
267
00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:16,257
[humming]
268
00:12:16,344 --> 00:12:18,172
Ah-ah-ah.
269
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:21,479
You're not stacking
according to the chart.
270
00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:24,569
Mug after bowl,
that is not your goal.
271
00:12:24,656 --> 00:12:28,312
But bowl after mug,
and you get a hug.
272
00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:30,619
Why don't we just use
the dishwasher?
273
00:12:30,706 --> 00:12:32,186
Wait. Don't tell me.
274
00:12:32,273 --> 00:12:34,579
Blah blah blah,
successful adult.
275
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:37,800
I know
you're being facetious,
276
00:12:37,887 --> 00:12:39,236
but you're right.
277
00:12:40,890 --> 00:12:42,413
Mug after bowl,
that's not my--
278
00:12:53,903 --> 00:12:56,210
[vacuum running]
279
00:13:01,868 --> 00:13:03,695
♪♪[rock playing
in headphones]
280
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,699
Mom.
281
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:09,136
- Mom!
- Aah!
282
00:13:09,223 --> 00:13:11,181
- Oh.
- [vacuum off]
283
00:13:11,268 --> 00:13:13,444
I just discovered
a super-quick way
284
00:13:13,531 --> 00:13:14,924
to pick up Gardner's toys.
285
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:17,753
Right?
286
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:19,233
Ha ha.
287
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:21,235
Wait.
Why are you up so early?
288
00:13:21,322 --> 00:13:22,671
It's not early.
It's late.
289
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,064
My alarm clock
was unplugged.
290
00:13:24,151 --> 00:13:25,717
Oh, no, no, no. That was me.
291
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:27,371
Yeah, I figured you should
get extra sleep
292
00:13:27,458 --> 00:13:28,808
since you're always so tired.
293
00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:30,679
But the bake sale
is in an hour,
294
00:13:30,766 --> 00:13:33,421
and we-- we don't
even have a cake yet.
295
00:13:33,508 --> 00:13:35,727
Oh, yikes,
I forgot about that.
296
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,339
Wait. I still have a lot
to do before my meeting.
297
00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:41,124
I can't let my client
think I don't
have my act together.
298
00:13:41,211 --> 00:13:44,345
You know what they say:
messy house equals messy brain.
299
00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:47,087
You know how to make
a cake, right?
300
00:13:47,174 --> 00:13:48,610
No.
301
00:13:48,697 --> 00:13:50,003
Ooh.
302
00:13:51,656 --> 00:13:54,485
Uh, mix it all in here.
303
00:13:54,572 --> 00:13:55,791
The mail bowl.
304
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,838
Well, not with the mail
in it, silly.
305
00:14:00,361 --> 00:14:01,492
Here.
306
00:14:10,501 --> 00:14:11,981
Need some help, buddy?
307
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:15,637
Here. Come on.
308
00:14:17,987 --> 00:14:21,208
Hey, Mom, what's going on?
Gardner's starving.
309
00:14:22,774 --> 00:14:25,865
I know. He keeps saying that.
310
00:14:25,952 --> 00:14:28,345
I told him to go ahead
and eat without me.
311
00:14:28,432 --> 00:14:30,695
He doesn't know
how to open milk.
312
00:14:30,782 --> 00:14:32,480
Are you okay?
313
00:14:32,567 --> 00:14:35,352
Yes. I'm fine.
314
00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:36,658
Why?
315
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,098
I have to run an errand.
316
00:14:42,185 --> 00:14:43,621
Can you start making the cake?
317
00:14:45,058 --> 00:14:48,931
Oh. Yes. Of course.
No problem.
318
00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:50,585
No problemo.
319
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:52,630
Pas de problème.
320
00:14:54,241 --> 00:14:56,286
You don't know how
to make a cake, do you?
321
00:14:58,158 --> 00:14:59,246
[bell dings]
322
00:15:00,464 --> 00:15:02,336
Can I help you find something?
323
00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:03,903
Yeah, I need another one
of those mugs--
324
00:15:03,990 --> 00:15:05,208
the Armenian old lady ones.
325
00:15:05,295 --> 00:15:06,731
Albanian.
326
00:15:06,818 --> 00:15:08,255
I need another one.
327
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:09,778
Why do you need another?
328
00:15:09,865 --> 00:15:12,563
You didn't break it,
did you?
329
00:15:12,650 --> 00:15:14,652
Uh, maybe.
330
00:15:14,739 --> 00:15:16,741
[sigh]
331
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:21,137
When the mug is ready
to be shipped out,
332
00:15:21,224 --> 00:15:22,704
the old women of the village
333
00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:25,315
gather to cast
the final spell.
334
00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:26,795
[chanting]
335
00:15:26,882 --> 00:15:28,971
Whatever words
you inscribe upon the mug
336
00:15:29,058 --> 00:15:30,842
will forever be true.
337
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,975
But if the mug shatters,
338
00:15:33,062 --> 00:15:34,977
the spell will
turn into a curse.
339
00:15:35,064 --> 00:15:36,544
[woman laughing]
340
00:15:36,631 --> 00:15:39,068
And the only thing
that can lift it is...
341
00:15:44,682 --> 00:15:46,336
To give most heart
like tiny grass?
342
00:15:46,423 --> 00:15:47,511
What does that mean?
343
00:15:47,598 --> 00:15:48,860
How should I know?
344
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:51,037
This is very poorly
translated.
345
00:15:54,605 --> 00:15:57,695
Got it. So, uh, can I
have another one?
346
00:15:57,782 --> 00:16:01,134
They only make one
every 140 years.
347
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,874
Didn't you get that?
348
00:17:13,989 --> 00:17:15,469
Mom, what are you doing?
349
00:17:15,556 --> 00:17:17,732
I was trying to find
a book on multitasking,
350
00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:19,168
but I got distracted.
351
00:17:19,255 --> 00:17:21,257
Why did I ever
join a book club?
352
00:17:21,344 --> 00:17:24,565
Your manuscript, Mom.
What happened?
353
00:17:24,652 --> 00:17:26,480
Well, I told Gardner
he could read it.
354
00:17:26,567 --> 00:17:28,003
He doesn't know
how to read, Mom.
355
00:17:29,526 --> 00:17:31,572
Yeah, or spell,
apparently.
356
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,619
Oh, no. He colored
all over it.
357
00:17:35,706 --> 00:17:37,926
[gasp] What am I
supposed to do?
358
00:17:38,013 --> 00:17:39,275
Oh, no.
359
00:17:39,362 --> 00:17:41,147
[smoke alarm blares]
360
00:17:41,234 --> 00:17:44,498
Mommy, make it stop.
361
00:17:44,585 --> 00:17:46,282
N-N-No.
362
00:17:46,369 --> 00:17:48,110
Aah! No, no, no, no.
363
00:17:48,197 --> 00:17:49,981
Aah! Oh! Aah.
364
00:17:51,592 --> 00:17:52,897
[coughing]
365
00:17:54,856 --> 00:17:56,988
Mom, why is Gardner
in the sink?
366
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,034
He got egg yolks
all over himself,
367
00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:00,949
and I didn't want him
to make a mess everywhere.
368
00:18:01,036 --> 00:18:02,951
[smoke alarm continues]
369
00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:07,173
[smoke alarm stops]
370
00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:10,045
Mom, why don't we
have any food?
371
00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:11,438
Didn't you just go
grocery shopping?
372
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:12,830
Well, the chore wheel said
373
00:18:12,917 --> 00:18:14,223
I was supposed to
clean the fridge today,
374
00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:16,747
so I just got rid
of everything.
375
00:18:16,834 --> 00:18:20,664
Oh, boy.
I really am off my game.
376
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:24,190
That quiz was right.
I am a mediocre mom.
377
00:18:24,277 --> 00:18:28,019
That was wrong.
I'm a terrible mom.
378
00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:30,761
Mom, don't worry.
I-- I can help out.
379
00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:32,589
I'll clean up here
and take care of things,
380
00:18:32,676 --> 00:18:34,025
but I need you to go
to the store.
381
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,592
Can you do that?
382
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:37,116
We just need so much stuff,
383
00:18:37,203 --> 00:18:38,595
I don't even know
where to begin.
384
00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:42,991
Here's a-- Here's a list.
385
00:18:43,078 --> 00:18:44,558
Thanks, Gortimer.
386
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:58,311
Mom, you forgot your list!
387
00:18:58,398 --> 00:19:00,748
- [clatter]
- Gardner, no! Don't do that!
388
00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:06,188
[sigh]
389
00:19:23,988 --> 00:19:25,033
Hey.
390
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:30,343
Are you ready to do your part
for unfortunate cats and dogs?
391
00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:31,779
Oh, no. The bake sale.
392
00:19:31,866 --> 00:19:33,998
I'm sorry. You got to
go without me.
393
00:19:35,565 --> 00:19:38,873
W-Whoa. What happened?
394
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:40,527
I'll explain later.
Let's just say
395
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:42,181
you might want
to get more cookies
from the bakery.
396
00:19:42,268 --> 00:19:43,399
[doorbell rings]
397
00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:44,966
Maybe I should have
had the bake sale
398
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:46,663
- at the bakery because--
- [ding dong]
399
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:48,709
...it's kind of like we have
one there every day anyway.
400
00:19:48,796 --> 00:19:50,363
- Yeah, yeah. Food for thought.
- [ding dong]
401
00:19:50,450 --> 00:19:51,668
- I got to go. Bye.
- Okay.
402
00:19:51,755 --> 00:19:52,974
It's open!
403
00:19:54,541 --> 00:19:55,629
Hello.
404
00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:01,287
Let me guess.
405
00:20:01,374 --> 00:20:03,202
You must be Gortimer Gibbon,
406
00:20:03,289 --> 00:20:05,856
first issue of the delightful
Claire Gibbon.
407
00:20:05,943 --> 00:20:08,642
Never heard it put that way,
but yeah, sure.
408
00:20:08,729 --> 00:20:11,253
I'm Winston Hobbes.
I have an appointment.
409
00:20:11,340 --> 00:20:13,908
Your mother has been
mangling my manuscript.
410
00:20:15,126 --> 00:20:16,824
[laughing]
411
00:20:16,911 --> 00:20:19,218
I'm kidding. Ha ha ha!
412
00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:21,698
But really, I don't have
much time. Is she in?
413
00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:23,744
Yeah. She'll just--
She'll be here in a second.
414
00:20:23,831 --> 00:20:25,267
- [glass shatters]
- Gardner: Oops.
415
00:20:25,354 --> 00:20:27,095
Can you hold this, please?
Thank you, sir.
416
00:20:28,401 --> 00:20:31,012
Gardner!
Put down the whisk!
417
00:20:43,590 --> 00:20:47,768
"Butylated hydroxytoluene."
418
00:20:47,855 --> 00:20:51,250
I guess they wouldn't put it
in there if it was bad for you.
419
00:20:51,337 --> 00:20:53,339
These kids look
like they're having fun.
420
00:20:58,735 --> 00:20:59,910
Mel.
421
00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:02,130
Oh. Hi.
422
00:21:02,217 --> 00:21:04,350
I was hoping I wouldn't
run into anyone I know.
423
00:21:04,437 --> 00:21:06,743
Yeah. I totally know
that feeling.
424
00:21:06,830 --> 00:21:13,097
Hey, uh, do you know what
butylated hydroxytoluene is?
425
00:21:13,184 --> 00:21:15,448
Do kids like it?
426
00:21:15,535 --> 00:21:18,189
You okay? What's wrong?
427
00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:19,887
I'm fine.
428
00:21:32,856 --> 00:21:35,294
I just wanted
to cover my freckles,
429
00:21:35,381 --> 00:21:37,861
and now this stuff
won't come off.
430
00:21:39,254 --> 00:21:40,560
Why are there a hundred
431
00:21:40,647 --> 00:21:42,170
different types
of make-up remover?
432
00:21:42,257 --> 00:21:44,215
And how am I
supposed to know
433
00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:46,000
what types of pores
I have?
434
00:21:48,132 --> 00:21:49,264
[sigh]
435
00:21:51,571 --> 00:21:52,615
Well...
436
00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:56,924
I like this kind.
437
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:02,059
It's for sensitive skin
like ours.
438
00:22:02,146 --> 00:22:03,713
Thanks.
439
00:22:05,889 --> 00:22:07,674
You know, Mel,
440
00:22:07,761 --> 00:22:10,720
your freckles
make you unique.
441
00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:16,813
You look so much
like your mom.
442
00:22:17,945 --> 00:22:19,947
Hey.
443
00:22:20,034 --> 00:22:22,079
I miss her, too.
444
00:22:23,646 --> 00:22:24,952
I want you to know
445
00:22:25,039 --> 00:22:26,780
that you can always
come to me
446
00:22:26,867 --> 00:22:28,347
for mom stuff.
447
00:22:28,434 --> 00:22:31,567
I know,
I know it's not the same.
448
00:22:32,742 --> 00:22:34,440
But I'm here for you...
449
00:22:34,527 --> 00:22:36,137
for anything.
450
00:22:46,321 --> 00:22:47,540
Let's get out of here.
451
00:22:47,627 --> 00:22:49,716
You don't want
that stuff?
452
00:22:49,803 --> 00:22:52,240
That's all just a bunch
of junk food.
453
00:22:52,327 --> 00:22:53,850
I don't know
what I was thinking.
454
00:22:53,937 --> 00:22:55,678
Come on.
I'll give you a ride.
455
00:22:55,765 --> 00:22:57,506
I just have to make
one quick stop first.
456
00:23:05,079 --> 00:23:06,646
What are you doing?
457
00:23:06,733 --> 00:23:08,778
I'm just trying to get
this gunk off this stove.
458
00:23:08,865 --> 00:23:11,215
Oh, don't worry about it.
I have special stuff for that.
459
00:23:11,302 --> 00:23:12,391
I got it.
460
00:23:14,349 --> 00:23:15,742
Mom?
461
00:23:19,833 --> 00:23:21,225
[chuckling]
462
00:23:21,312 --> 00:23:23,837
Hey, you better get going.
463
00:23:23,924 --> 00:23:25,229
Going where?
464
00:23:25,316 --> 00:23:26,970
To your bake sale.
465
00:23:27,057 --> 00:23:28,319
Oh, no. It's okay.
466
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:30,191
I already told Ranger
I couldn't go.
467
00:23:30,278 --> 00:23:32,323
Besides, it's too late
to make a cake now.
468
00:23:33,716 --> 00:23:37,024
Well, here you go.
469
00:23:37,111 --> 00:23:39,461
Made from scratch.
470
00:23:39,548 --> 00:23:41,202
What? How?
471
00:23:41,289 --> 00:23:43,334
I didn't say
I made it from scratch.
472
00:23:43,422 --> 00:23:44,858
It's what bakeries
are for.
473
00:23:47,121 --> 00:23:49,340
I have no idea how you
do this every day.
474
00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:51,430
Me, neither.
475
00:23:51,517 --> 00:23:53,736
Go. Have fun.
476
00:23:53,823 --> 00:23:55,825
Oh. And before I go,
477
00:23:55,912 --> 00:23:57,174
Gardner's taking a nap,
478
00:23:57,261 --> 00:23:58,785
your ficus plant
needs a new pot,
479
00:23:58,872 --> 00:24:00,526
and your client guy's been
waiting in the living room
480
00:24:00,613 --> 00:24:02,615
for, like, 30 minutes.
I love you.
481
00:24:04,791 --> 00:24:06,140
Oh.
482
00:24:06,227 --> 00:24:07,794
Wow. Uh--
483
00:24:08,969 --> 00:24:10,797
Okay. Ohh.
484
00:24:15,366 --> 00:24:16,324
Winston.
485
00:24:17,673 --> 00:24:19,066
Mr. Hobbes.
486
00:24:19,153 --> 00:24:22,591
I am so, so sorry I'm late.
487
00:24:22,678 --> 00:24:24,027
I had a parent emergency.
488
00:24:24,114 --> 00:24:25,812
I'm on a very tight schedule.
489
00:24:25,899 --> 00:24:28,118
I'm sure you of all people
can appreciate that.
490
00:24:28,205 --> 00:24:30,294
I completely understand.
491
00:24:30,381 --> 00:24:33,776
To be honest, after waiting
for you for 20 minutes,
492
00:24:33,863 --> 00:24:35,648
I was only staying
so I could tell you
493
00:24:35,735 --> 00:24:37,084
that you didn't get the job.
494
00:24:38,564 --> 00:24:40,217
Oh.
495
00:24:40,304 --> 00:24:42,306
But then I
saw the manuscript
496
00:24:42,393 --> 00:24:44,787
and decided to go
through your notes.
497
00:24:44,874 --> 00:24:47,224
That really wasn't
meant for you to see.
498
00:24:47,311 --> 00:24:48,791
My son kind of
went crazy on it.
499
00:24:48,878 --> 00:24:50,445
Yes, I know.
500
00:24:50,532 --> 00:24:53,230
But I'm glad I got
your unfiltered thoughts.
501
00:24:54,797 --> 00:24:57,496
These notes are fantastic.
502
00:24:57,583 --> 00:25:02,022
Ha ha. Although scribbling
out chapter 3 in blue crayon
503
00:25:02,109 --> 00:25:03,719
seems a little unnecessary.
504
00:25:03,806 --> 00:25:06,069
[laughing]
505
00:25:06,156 --> 00:25:08,507
But the drawing of the poodle
was quite charming.
506
00:25:10,291 --> 00:25:13,207
So can we make it official?
507
00:25:13,294 --> 00:25:16,253
Are you giving me the job?
508
00:25:16,340 --> 00:25:17,994
I'd be a fool not to.
509
00:25:18,081 --> 00:25:19,518
Thank you.
510
00:25:19,605 --> 00:25:22,085
I promise you will have
my undivided attention.
511
00:25:22,172 --> 00:25:23,913
No more emergencies.
512
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:27,221
Gardner: Mommy! Mommy!
513
00:25:34,097 --> 00:25:35,534
Gortimer:
We sometimes think
514
00:25:35,621 --> 00:25:37,318
that the only way
to show our worth
515
00:25:37,405 --> 00:25:40,234
is by doing things
for others.
516
00:25:40,321 --> 00:25:43,803
But when that gets
to be too much,
517
00:25:43,890 --> 00:25:46,849
remember that people
don't expect more from us
518
00:25:46,936 --> 00:25:48,851
than to just be ourselves.
519
00:25:52,942 --> 00:25:54,640
So let yourself off the hook
520
00:25:54,727 --> 00:25:57,120
and appreciate the things
that make you...
521
00:25:58,252 --> 00:26:00,428
well...you.
35410
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