Original subtitles

- So, how's it like going in there?

- It's all quiet.

- No more argumentative older women?

- Or young ones.

- Hey, the other day, that was just, like,

a big misunderstanding.

- Oh, yeah, fully.

- Thought I'd take Tess's advice, you know,

take a few days off, relax.

- Mm-hmm.

- So, when are you going riding again?

- Oh, probably going to give that one

a bit of a rest, I reckon.

- Oh, how come?

I thought you loved it.

- Changed my mind. - [Ruby] Oh.

♪ 'Cause everybody knows ♪

♪ That I just can't help myself when I'm with you ♪

♪ So brand new ♪

♪ 'Cause everybody knows ♪

(upbeat guitar music)

- [Dr. Kelly] Have a seat. - Sure.

- So, what can I do for you?

- Well, I'm here for my results.

The biopsy. - Ah, of course.

(keyboard clacking)

- Have they come through? - [Dr. Kelly] One minute.

(Astrid sighs impatiently)

All clear.

- What?

- The mole's fine, nothing to worry about.

- Really?

- It's always a bit stressful, isn't it?

- Yeah.

- Now, don't wait so long, next time, okay?

And we will see you for another skin check next year.

(keyboard clacking)

- Yeah, okay.

- [Dr. Kelly] Is there anything else?

- I don't know, I just,

I don't know, I can't quite believe it.

- It's good news, huh?

- Yeah, well, I mean, it might not have been.

- Count yourself lucky and wear sunscreen.

- Yeah.

(Astrid exhales loudly)

- [Saffron] Oh, that must be such a relief, congrats.

- Yeah.

Well, I mean, I didn't really do anything

except worry over nothing.

- You had faith and positive thinking.

Yeah. - I guess.

- Don't underestimate what you can do.

- Yeah, the power to double check

all the numbers on a spreadsheet, yay.

- Work still doing your head in?

- (sighs loudly) Yep.

I think I'd rather be mucking out a stable.

- I would not be so sure of that.

- Yeah, but I mean, it's not like

you're stuck doing it forever, right?

- Neither are you.

- Yeah, my contract begs to differ.

- So, mix it up.

- How?

- Look, Eleanor, she didn't want to take my ideas

on at first, either.

Now, we feed Leonardo first, because otherwise,

he gets all stroppy.

- Who?

- A big, like, beautiful Warlander.

A horse.

- Oh, right.

I don't know, so, what, you're suggesting I...

- Show them what you can do.

- Yeah, but how?

- I don't know.

If you're bored doing the work,

do something extra, you know?

Don't just phone it in.

- I mean, it's not like they're going

to listen to me anyway.

- Hey, you are like the most creative person

that I know, okay?

Channel that.

- Yeah?

- Or, you know, spend the rest of your working life

being slowly tortured, it's up to you.

(Astrid sighs)

(footsteps crunching)

- You know what this is?

- It's some magnolia plant.

- No, on the marks on the leaves.

It means it wasn't nurtured enough.

- That's got nothing to do with me.

- I didn't say that.

Just chill, all right?

Take it easy.

- Well, so you wanted to see me?

- No, you can keep that.

- It's not really my style.

- Yeah, mine either, but don't tell Jackie,

because she picked the color.

- Uh oh.

Don't worry, your secret's safe with me.

- Look, the point I'm trying to make is,

you know, no one's perfect, all right?

- I guess that's true.

- So, you want to talk about what happened?

- There's no need.

- Well, agree to disagree on that one.

- Oh, well, if there's nothing else.

- You know, I used to be like you.

I mean, not all, like, short-tempered.

- Oh, thanks. - Well, you are.

I mean, you're mad as a cut snake most days,

and that's okay, I mean, I get it, you know, I get it.

- Yeah?

- Yeah, that's what caught me into horticulture initially,

you know, working with the plants

and being surrounded by nature,

you know, sort of calms you down.

- Well, I'll take your word for it.

- Well, find out for yourself.

(gentle music)

Listen, don't come back today,

you know, go home, sort out what you need to sort out,

you know, suss out what you want to do,

because, Heidi, I need people that are committed, you know,

that really want do the job genuinely.

(gentle music continues)

- Yeah, okay.

- Okay, because if you're not happy,

you know, what's the point?

(gentle music continues)

- Also, rather than having to manually go in

and, like, enter the client's appointments,

you can just send that link out,

and then they can enter it themselves.

- But isn't that your job? - I mean, like, part of it.

- It's, yeah.

- Lots of places are using it.

- Astrid, don't get me wrong,

I understand the benefits, I do,

I just don't think it's really Paul's style.

- But you can send the links out as ads,

and, like, it doesn't cost much at all.

I mean, everyone will get loads more clients.

- Yes, then it gets you off the phone.

- It's just another option.

- What do you want me to do?

- I don't know, I mean, Paul said to talk to you about it.

- Look, I'm under the pump.

Maybe you can take me through it properly,

maybe over a drink.

- It's just, it's on my desktop right now,

it would take, like, 10 minutes.

- I just don't think Paul's going to go for it,

and I think maybe you should be here for a couple years

before you start trying to make big changes.

(Astrid scoffs softly)

(gentle rock music)

- Great, thanks, Owen.

(gentle rock music continues)

(gentle rock music continues)

(birds chirping) (water sloshing)

- How's the water?

Someone turned the solar heating off.

- Oh, yeah, sorry, it was loud.

- Where have you been? - Where do you think?

- Didn't you quit?

- Yeah, well, it turns out I can un-quit.

- Want to be a slave to the wage?

- Yeah, well, can't pay rent on the dole, can I?

- Wait, you're looking for a place?

- Yeah.

Aunt Kath wants me out so badly.

- Maybe she doesn't.

- That's not what you said the other day.

- Look, I don't know, okay, just ask yourself.

- I don't know, it's probably for the best,

out on my own two feet and all that.

- Why?

I mean, the system's out to get you.

- Is it? - Yeah. (chuckles)

What's rent now for, like, a shoebox?

- It's a lot.

- You know, we're not that bad of housemates, are we?

- I mean, you are better than Wayne.

- I don't know why you just didn't come here sooner,

as soon as Aunt Tara bolted.

- Oh, I had my reasons.

- A pretty, blonde reason?

(both giggle)

So, what's the plan?

- I don't know.

I guess I have to think it all over.

Figure it out.

(birds chirping)

- Whatever you do, just get somewhere with a pool, okay?

Then, I can come visit.

(both giggle)

- What do you think you are doing?

- Just thought I'd get an early start on my taxes.

- I get it, I'm going be your next victim.

- Don't like it, do you,

when someone just shows up at you work?

- How did you even know I worked here?

Oh, cyber-stalking.

That makes sense.

- Hardly.

When you post about it all the time in your social media?

Get over yourself.

- Yeah, see, the difference is

when I showed up at the clothes store, that was an accident.

- Yeah, and you could have just left.

- Don't like your reputation following you around?

- It's not fair. - It is, actually.

You got away scot-free.

- Oh, yeah, after Heidi bashed my head in.

- Oh, my God, let me just bust out my little violin for you.

You deserved it. - I don't deserve this.

- I just want your coworkers to see who you really are.

- And you think you are so perfect,

like you wouldn't do anything wrong.

- I would never harass someone.

- So, what do you call showing up

to somebody's workplace then

and bringing up things from ages ago

and making sure that they lose their job?

- Wow, so even your sister thinks you're a piece of work.

At least there's one good egg in the family.

- (scoffs) Wow, wow.

- [Celeste] What?

- You think I'm all sick and twisted?

Have you ever actually taken a look in the mirror?

- [Dad] What's got into you this week?

- It's just not the right fit.

- [Dad] (sighs) Is that what you want me to tell Paul?

- I don't care, tell him whatever.

- [Dad] All this because Owen didn't like your idea.

- No, it's just, no one likes any of my ideas, Dad,

and it wasn't just that.

- Here we go. - It's just all the comments.

- What? - I think some people, like,

see that I'd had girlfriends.

- I'll rip his head off.

- Don't worry about him.

I'm done.

- At least your course starts soon.

- I can't.

- Why not?

You're really good at it.

- It's just not what I want to do.

- Well, you can't sit around here all day

trying to sell bloody yoga wear.

- Why not?

- Potential lawsuits, attempted kidnapping,

you don't know the first thing about business.

- Well, maybe that's what I should be studying then,

don't you think?

- I'll get my laptop.

- I've been performing since I was three years old,

and I'm really excited to keep learning,

which is why I think that your institution

will be the perfect fit for me,

and please, please, please offer me a place.

- Okay, yes. - Really?

- Yeah, why not?

- I wasn't very convincing.

- Nah, you were,

you were great.

- Yeah, exactly that.

- I don't know, maybe your heart isn't in it.

- No, I already decided. Apply here, stay in Melbs, close to home,

just forget all about a certain someone.

Actually, I'm sorry, can we do that again,

because I feel like I need to mention

that I was deputy captain of the cheer squad in year seven.

- Uh-huh. - What?

- Hey, can I come with you?

- To the city?

- Yeah, free lift.

- I was going to take PT.

- Still.

- Okay.

- Well, I'll get to yours at, like, 12,

and then we can catch the train together,

walk to the station?

- Yeah, my interview's at 3:00, so that'll work.

- Okay, cool.

- Okay, so from the top.

(door tapping)

- [Saffron] It'll be Astrid, I'll get it.

(gentle uplifting music)

- Hey.

(gentle uplifting music continues)

Um, you know, I don't actually think

that your door was locked properly, which that's not good,

you know, anyone could be hanging around.

- What are you doing here?

- I was actually wondering

if Mila was home. (chuckles softly)

- She is, actually.

(gentle uplifting music continues)

So, you just jumped on a plane

and flew halfway across the country?

- Yeah, pretty much.

- What about your job?

(gentle uplifting music continues)

- Figured it could wait.

(gentle uplifting music continues)

- I mean, it's a bit of a trek,

but it's only three days a week in person, so.

- So, not as bad as you thought?

- Babe, I'm killing it.

(Astrid chuckles softly) (birds chirping)

What about you?

Did you get fired yet?

- I would've been. - Shut up, really?

- Honestly, I don't know how much longer

I could have stuck it out.

- (laughs) Had to break out of the cubicle somehow?

- At least I had one.

Apparently, most places, hot desk.

- Ugh. - Yep.

- So, what do you want to do?

We could go see some big blockbuster, superhero thing.

- (laughs) Actually, I was hoping

that maybe you could help me?

- No, not allowed.

What, I don't wanna be accused of being pushy.

- Maybe I need one.

I don't know, I kind of always do whatever's easiest.

- Like everyone.

- Yeah, but you're different, and I like that,

and I want to be more like that.

- Girl, I got a 68 ATAR, you do not want to be like me.

What's this?

Astridology PTY?

- It's my label or my company name.

- You got the ABN.

- Yep, officially incorporated.

- We might need to work on the name though.

(Astrid laughs)

- And I enrolled in a business course,

so a little bit of numbers,

but it'll teach me marketing, sales, you know,

how to do my own thing.

- Sounds like you got it all figured out.

- Yeah, almost.

- How can I be of service?

- Well, I kind of hate being in front of the camera.

- Ah, so you want a free model then?

- I can pay you in cookies.

- Yeah, if you want nothing to fit anymore.

- Or...

(women kissing softly)

- Kisses?

Seriously, what kind of business are you running here?

- Oh. - I'm kidding.

(gentle music)

(gentle music continues)

- Sorry, I'm just trying to wrap my head around it,

you were sort of the last person I was expecting to see.

- Yeah, I forgot you hate surprises.

(birds chirping)

- This one's not so bad.

Wish you would've done it earlier.

- For formal, yeah.

- I thought it was dumb.

Us flying around to see each other,

impossibly expensive on a plant technician's wage.

- Well, not if it's just a one-off.

- You basically said that you didn't want me

to come to Queensland.

- Yeah, only because I didn't want you

to do that just for me.

- What's wrong with that?

- I don't know, like, the pressure of all of that,

and you would feel trapped.

- After living under Mom's rules?

- This is a different kind.

You know what I mean.

- Sort of.

(birds continue chirping)

- I didn't want you to turn

your whole life around just for me.

- The course in Queensland was fine.

- Yeah, but it wasn't your dream,

and you hate the heat.

- True.

It would've been worth it.

- I know.

Now.

(birds continue chirping)

- So?

- I figured if this is where you are,

then this is where I should be.

- Really? - Yeah.

- This is what I have been saying the whole time.

- I know. (both giggle)

- So, what, you want to move back to Melbourne?

- Yeah, Melbourne, Sydney, Queensland, the Moon, wherever.

- You just have no idea how much I wanted you to say that.

- Well, I'm not good at the word thing.

- Better than me.

(both chuckle softly)

- Also, it's really expensive to live by yourself.

- Oh, yeah, I get it now.

(both laugh)

♪ Oh, it's not love if it ain't disarray ♪

♪ And I don't ever want to change it ♪

♪ Just because I'm falling doesn't mean I want to be saved ♪

(both giggling)

♪ So I'll float in the chaos and won't come down ♪

♪ 'Cause it feels like I'm myself ♪

- I'm back.

(both giggling)

- I have an interview.

- [Heidi] What?

You have to tell me about that.

♪ I'm awake, half asleep ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm on the brink of an existential crisis ♪

♪ It's normal for me ♪

♪ No, I don't care ♪

♪ I really, really don't care ♪

♪ And I never think right before I speak ♪

♪ But I'm not going to paint you a different picture of me ♪

♪ No, I don't care ♪

♪ I know you wish that I cared ♪

♪ I wouldn't want to clear it up ♪

♪ It's the light and it's the shade ♪

♪ When the days fall hard with sticks and stones ♪

♪ Let them ricochet ♪

♪ Oh, it's not love if it ain't disarray ♪

♪ And I don't ever wanna change it ♪

♪ Just because I'm falling doesn't mean I want to be saved ♪

♪ So I'll float in the chaos and won't come down ♪

♪ 'Cause it feels like I'm myself ♪

♪ In this disarray ♪

("Disarray" by Beo continues)

- Oh, I've got it, I've got it.

- Oh, you cooked.

- Yeah, but it's your birthday.

- Tomorrow.

- Well, birthday weekend, then.

- Okay.

Are we doing anything?

- I may have a little something something planned.

- Going dancing?

- Seriously, cheerleading twice a week

is still not enough for you?

- Do you have to hate it so much?

- [Heidi] I didn't say I hated it.

- Pretty much the first thing you said to me was that,

"You're a terrible dancer, Saffron,"

oh, and, "I love Satan."

- [Heidi] (laughs) Yeah, that was a really special moment.

Thank you. - Yeah.

(gentle music)

- [Heidi] (chuckles softly) Special needs.

- That was the insult.

- You know what I was really thinking at that sleepover?

- Sure.

- That I chose the wrong cheerleader.

I mean, don't get me wrong,

you were both really uncoordinated,

but you definitely have the edge. (giggles)

- [Saffron] Okay, thanks.

- Hey, did you move this?

- Me? - Yes, you.

- Oh, yeah, I was stealing your money.

- That's not funny.

- It fell off by accident.

- You're being weird.

- No, I'm not.

- You peeked.

You peeked.

- I'm sorry, you know I hate surprises.

- Saff, no, - Hey, hey, hey, hey,

I'll just pretend that I've never seen it,

or we can do a presents tonight, it doesn't even matter.

- It's not a birthday present.

- It's for me though, right?

- Yes, it's for you.

- Christmas? (Heidi exhales sharply)

- It's not that sort of ring.

(gentle music)

- Oh, my God. - No, don't freak out.

- No, no, I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.

- It was stupid, it was stupid.

No, it's not.

It's not.

- You don’t have to do it now.

- Okay, I have thought about this for a long time.

Saff, will you- - Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

- Yes, yes, just yes like that, right?

(both giggling)

- Oh, my, is it a sapphire?

- Well, I wasn't going to get you a ruby.

(both laughing)

Oh, my God, come here.

(gentle music continues)

Oh, my God, oh, my God, it looks so good.

I love it, I love you. - I love it.

I love this moment. (both giggle)

♪ 'Cause everybody knows ♪

♪ That I just can't help myself when I'm with you ♪

♪ So brand new ♪

♪ 'Cause everybody knows ♪

(upbeat electric guitar music)

- Hey - Hello

Thank you for watching.

- We hope that you guys have really enjoyed watching

Heidi and Saffron’s - Whole journey.

Yes. Their love story

Over many

There were quite a few seasons,

- 2 or 3? - and some movies in between

Thank you for supporting this show and how much you enjoyed this.

This OTP couple. I’m sure its meant a lot to people?

Yeah.

We hope you're happy with how it all ended with them.

You know, Mrs. & Mrs. (both laugh)

I think it's a very happy ending.

Yeah. Yeah.

We're just saying I think Rod walks her down the aisle.

Yes, nice would be nice.

Yeah.

- They live a long, happy life together. - Mila like, changes her ways.

Okay. Yeah.

Mila's probably on, like, a LGBT mom Facebook group.

Yeah. Now? Yeah, sure.

Yeah.

Well, thank you guys for all of your support

and everything that you've done for the show.

And, yeah, we just want to say thanks.

- Thank you. We hope you enjoyed it. - Bye.

(background party chattering) (punk rock music)

- My parents are taking me up to Sydney next week

to watch them.

- [Party Goer] Watching the underwater snow?

- We were walking here, you're not walking home.

(rock music continues) (people chattering)

- Lost count.

- Well, I hope you can cope with the anger love.

- [Wade] Okay.

(music and chattering continues)

- I'm so sorry, but please just agree with everything I say.

Can you please? He's a monster.

- [Wade] Yeah and another thing about, hi.

- Hi. - Kerri agrees with me.

- [Kerri] I do.

- About the day, you agree about the day old rice?

- Yes, about the rice.

- [Wade] How are you agreeing with her, about what?

So you can't eat rice if it's over a day old?

- Not if you reheat it, right?

- Yes, no if you reheat it, there's like bacteria and stuff.

- That's what I've been saying.

- [Wade] And what?

That bacteria isn't there if you don't reheat it?

- No, but it gets like really dangerous when you reheat it.

Like it, yeah, yeah. - There's like studies.

Like if you research it is what I've been trying to say.

- Look, I eat day old rice all the time.

It's never been a problem before.

- You know what I mean. - Yeah, yeah.

A hundred percent. I actually, my uncle,

oh, it's quite traumatic actually.

My uncle, he had day old Chinese food

and he was in the hospital for like a week.

It was really hard on the family.

It's a dangerous, dangerous thing.

- Mm yeah, I'm sure it was.

I'm not buying. - I don't think you're one

to trivialize her trauma.

- I'm not trivializing her trauma, my heart goes out.

It really does, it bleeds,

but there's never been a problem with day old rice,

and the story about your uncle doesn't mean any, what?

You just happen to find the one person at a party

that corroborates the story? - [Beth] I'm sorry.

When you look at all the articles, it's research based.

- [Wade] How is putting rice through a microwave

that heats it with radiation any better?

- Because it breeds it while it's in there.

The longer it's in there,

the more- - Right, it's the moisture.

It collects The moisture. - The moisture, yes.

- And that's where the bacteria comes through.

It's common sense. - [Wade] When you heat it?

Moisture with heat?

- Yes. - Yes.

- [Wade] Like without it, okay.

- Yes.

- [Wade] I think you need to read a few studies.

- I have read all the studies. Just Google it.

- Two against one, sorry.

(ethereal techno music)

- Getting a bit hot in there, wasn't it?

- Mm, yeah.

- Speaking of, thanks for saving me.

Wade was being a monster.

(both giggling) - Yeah, no, it's fine.

I know how Wade can be.

- Yeah, yeah.

- But I do kind of agree with him.

- No. - Yeah.

- You can't be serious. - Yeah.

- I'm right and I know I'm right.

- But I have had like takeaway Chinese food all the time,

like the morning after.

- But what about your uncle? That's a prime example.

- I don't have an uncle.

- What you mean you have no uncle?

You just told us all some story about your uncle.

- I lied. (laughing) - What!

- Yeah. - Whoa.

You are a good liar.

- Thank you. - Excellent job for that one.

- Yeah, I'm gonna watch that.

- Maybe you should become a politician.

(Kerri chuckling)

- That's really funny.

- Thank you. - I think I should.

- I think-

- Or maybe I should become a standup comedian.

- I think you would be good. - You think I'm that funny?

Yeah? - Yeah.

I become a politician, you become a standup comedian.

My first law as politician would be-

- To make everyone hire me

for their stand up comedy. - Yes!

Yes, how did you know? - Yes.

We're on the same wavelength.

- We're connected you and I. - We clicked in.

But see, none of that could happen

if you die from food poisoning from heating up rice.

(both chuckling)

- Well hold on, I thought you jumped a gun a little bit.

- No, no, I'm going circling back

'cause I'm not over this rice thing.

(Carrie chuckling) I'm not over it.

Wade dared Leo to snort soy sauce, so stupid.

And of course Leo did it, but then Wade wouldn't pay Leo

because he claimed it was cultural appropriation,

even though he's the one who dared Leo.

- Oh god. - So stupid.

- Sounds like Wade.

- This is me.

- Oh.

- Yeah, catching the bus home, so.

- That's okay, I'll wait with you.

- Oh no, you don't have to do that.

- No, it's all good, I'm just up the road.

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

Takes me like two minutes to walk home,

I'll wait, I'll wait.

- Thank you, that's so nice.

- All good.

(crickets chirping)

- What are you doing tomorrow?

- I'm working tomorrow.

- Oh, nice, where do you work?

- Do you know that bakery on Main Street?

It's like a pink and green sort of aesthetic.

- Oh yeah, yeah. I feel like I've walked past that

a hundred times, but I've never been in.

- You should, it's really good.

I'll give you a staff discount.

- Thank you.

- No, but we sell such good stuff.

Pretty much everything you can chuck in an oven, we sell.

- Nice.

- So do you like pies?

(Beth sighing)

- Oh, I miss meat pies. Stuck on veggie pies now.

- Oh, you're vegetarian?

- Yeah. - Oh god.

Voluntarily?

- Yeah. (Kerri laughing)

But right now I could really go with a meat pie.

Some tomato sauce.

- Oh yeah. Oh, you're making me hungry.

- Oh.

- We also sell some mousses.

- Oh, mooses?

- Yeah like chocolate mousse.

- Oh. - Not the animal.

(Kerri chuckling)

- I was like a cake shaped like a moose?

(both laughing)

A chocolate mousse, yum. - Yeah.

A chocolate mousse. - Yum.

- And also brownies. I think the brownies are my favorite.

- Oh, I love brownies.

- Yeah. - I love brownies warmed up.

And ice cream, strawberries. - Fresh strawberries.

Oh yep.

- Divine.

- So good.

- Do you work with nice people?

- Um, yeah, yeah.

- That didn't sound very confident.

- I'm still relatively new, so, you know.

My coworker, there's one in particular,

I just kind of like, we don't really talk during our shift.

- That's not very fun.

- Yeah, but like yeah, we just go there to work and go home.

- Well that's fair I guess.

- She bit of a hardass sometimes.

What are you doing tomorrow?

- Supposed to be a nice day tomorrow.

Thought maybe I'll go to the lake. Get some vitamin D.

Yeah. You should come after work.

- Yeah. What time are you gonna be there?

- What time do you finish? (both chuckling)

- Well, I can shift things around.

- Well, I was planning to be there around 12, so.

- I could do that.

- You could? - Yeah, yeah.

- That would be good.

- Yeah, I'll see you then. - That would be good, yeah.

- Yeah.

- I could bring like a volleyball

when we go in the lake. (Kerri laughing)

- Yeah. - Yeah?

- Yeah we could do that.

- I'm still thinking about the mousse.

(both laughing) - Chocolate moose.

(both laughing)

We should start selling chocolate moose.

- Yeah. - Chocolate meese?

Chocolate mooses.

- Choco, mice? No. (both laughing)

- We should sell chocolate-

- What is the plural of moose?

- Moose, meese? - Yeah it's just moose?

Like fish. - Oh I think it's just moose.

- Yeah.

(both giggling)

(playful rock music)