Original subtitles

[bouncy piano music]

- [Dean] Dad, you take your pills?

- [Dean's father] Yes.

[BB pellets shooting] - [Dean] With food?

- [Dean's father] Yes.

[BB pellets shooting]

- Oh, dad what are you doing?

Dad, BB gun?

Give me that please, thank you.

God, I thought I threw that out.

- Yeah, the kid from 11 is trying to steal my roses.

- No, she's just tying her shoelaces.

- Yeah cause she saw us watching.

Conniving little bitch.

- Hey, she's eight.

- Yeah, well so's that Thumberg girl.

She's trying to take over the world.

Here she's trying to ban meat,

and half the sausages in the supermarket

are made of peas these days.

Madness.

- Um,

so, Dad,

the Rib Theater is putting on Sweeney Todd.

I was thinking that I might audition.

I guess it would only be a couple nights a week.

- And who is going to make my dinner?

- Well, I was thinking that I could, uh

make a few meals on Sunday

and then put them in the fridge

for you to heat up later.

It's really easy.

- I'm not using the microwave.

You can do your weeny dog thing some other time.

Don't forget my knees.

[joyful piano music]

- Is that where you want it?

- [Dean] Mm, down a on the left I think?

- [Ellie] Uh, no, up on the right.

Perfect.

- Oh, they are so special.

- You look very glam today, Shares.

- I was just at the mall getting a few bits and bobs

and I decided to get my makeup done.

- Aw. - You look beautiful, Shares.

- Stop it.

Should we hold hands?

Take a minute for Hemi.

- Yeah. - Do you wanna say something?

- Yes.

Um,

Cordo, we

miss you. - Hm.

- We love you.

We

hope to make you proud

by taking Loving Tributes to the next level.

- Aw.

Yeah, Beau?

- Oh no no, I haven't prepared anything.

- It's alright.

Yeah. - Okay.

- I mean I could,

I guess I could freestyle.

Yo, Hemi

That's pretty hard to rhyme, man.

[clears throat]

Hemi

[rapping] We miss you, man.

and we wish you weren't dead,

but you lost the battle to the tumor in your head.

Thanks for the job and the mean advice.

I love cheese toasters

and chicken fried rice.

Loving Tributes Funeral Home.

Drive your car carefully in a school zone.

Casket, casket, human in a basket

Got the f- - Alright thank you, Beau.

Thank you. - No I shouldn't.

- Hmm? - No, I shouldn't.

- Shouldn't what?

- I shouldn't sing.

- Oh.

- No, no, it's not about me,

it's about Hemi.

- Okay, that was nice.

Back to it.

- Oh.

Casket casket human in a basket.

[Beau laughs]

[Dean humming Amazing Grace]

- [singing] Zing grace

How sweet

the sound.

[electronic ballad]

♪ Beginning of the end

♪ Just asking for a friend

♪ So let's just call it square

- Pancakes.

What the fuck's a sieve?

What is this?

So fancy.

Oh yeah, it's, it's. [stammering]

♪ Just maybe

[phone notification]

[tapping floor]

- [Bop It!] High score, 22!

- Piece of piss.

- [Bop It!] Bop it! [Bop It music begins]

Twist it!

Pull it!

Twist it!

Pull it! - Oo!

- [Bop It!] Bop it!

Twist it! [gasps]

Bop it!

Pull it!

Yeah! - Ugh!

- [Bop It!] Remember my first time playing Bop It.

Bop it to start!

- No, I don't want to.

- [Bop It!] I'm going to sleep!

- Okay.

[typing]

[joyful piano music]

Gotcha.

- [Ellie] Hello.

- [Ollie] Hi, sorry, we were early.

- Oh, has Sharyn offered you drinks already?

- Yes, I ordered a tea a long time ago.

- Sorry, she's- - Don't be,

it's been like two minutes. - Not by my watch.

- Well, I'd hate to argue with the genuine Galvin Kline.

- I'm Ollie.

And this is my partner Manu and my sister-in-law Moira.

- Brent's wife.

- I've got the fancy thickies.

- Thank you.

- Careful, love, it's very hot.

- Oh, shit, that's

hot.

- She just told you how hot it was.

- So so sorry.

- Have you had a chance to take a look at our offerings?

- Here at Loving Tributes we do our very best

to honor any request.

- Yeah, honoring your loved one is our priority.

- Oh.

Uh, Sharyn is there anything else?

- [Sharyn] [faintly] Oh, I, oh, does my?

Oh.

Yeah, I'll just leave you to it.

- [Dean] Thank you.

- Oliver, oh, I'm sorry,

I'm struggling to speak because my tongue is so burnt.

Oliver and I have agreed to split the costs.

Brent deserves the best,

so I'm thinking we'll do the deluxe package.

- So that's the Rosewood gloss casket.

- Beautiful choice.

- [Manu] That's $4,000.

- And?

- And that seems like a lot of money for something

that's gonna rot.

- Manu.

- Sorry, I don't mean to be crass,

but what about the pine?

It's eco-friendly. - It's tacky.

- We can make the Rosewood work.

- In terms of flowers,

the deluxe package includes the casket spray,

the sympathy bowl,

uh wreath. - Not to forget the

six bouquets.

- Yes, thank you, Dean,

I was just about to say that.

- $1,600, we can't afford that.

- [Ollie] Babe.

- What was that, Manu?

- Sorry. I hate to be that guy,

but that feels like a lot of money

for something that's also gonna die.

- It's okay.

- Ollie, it's our honeymoon money.

- Oh, I'm sorry that my husband's death

is such an inconvenience to you.

- He's not saying that.

- I am saying that. - It's just

a bit of a stretch.

- We do have payment plans available.

- Stop being so difficult, he's your brother.

- Well, we all know Brent

wouldn't have done the same for Ollie.

- How

dare you?

- Babe, don't go there.

- What?

He was an asshole.

We all know he was an asshole.

He was an asshole.

- Shut your fucking mouth!

- [Dean] Oh, oh.

[gasps and groans dramatically]

- I'm not doing this.

- Oh.

Oh my gosh.

- Um, okay.

- I need some air.

- [Ellie] Are you okay?

- It's gonna bruise.

[soft exhales]

[joyful piano music]

- Oh, you stole my snacky spot.

- Oh sorry.

I can move. - [Sharyn] Don't be silly.

[chip bag crackling]

[salt shaker shaking]

[chip bag crackling]

- Oh, you want some?

Salt and vinegar. - I'm all right,

actually, thanks.

- [Dean] It is a lot of money,

but the detailing is exquisite.

- Sorry. I dunno how I ended up in here.

I got lost.

- We also have some fantastic middle of the range options.

The mahogany,

the rimu,

or you could go the maple stained medium density fiberboard.

- Yeah, maybe.

- These are not easy decisions.

Planning a funeral is stressful and draining and believe me,

we've seen it all.

We're not here to judge.

- Look, I appreciate what you're doing.

It's just really hard to watch my husband spend our savings

on such a prick.

- Oh.

- Brent tormented Ollie his entire life.

Teased him, stole his stuff, called him a pussy,

beat him up.

When we started dating,

Moira and Brent completely cut him out,

but despite all of that

Ollie still invited them to our wedding,

and guess who didn't show up.

- Well I bet your wedding was better for it.

- I just don't get why Ollie feels like he has to do this.

Moira's taking advantage of him.

If it were up to me, Brent would be buried in a sack.

- Well, we do have some lovely Hessian options.

[Manu chuckles]

- Sorry, I didn't mean to dump our baggage on you.

- [Dean] No, don't be sorry.

That's just family. [soft piano music]

What if I gave you and Oliver the Rosewood at cost?

- Dean, we can't that's.

- No, that way everyone's happy.

- Thank you.

- [Manu] Hey.

- Hey.

- Sorry

- It's okay.

- Margot Robbie, is that you?

- I don't look like Margot Robbie,

do I? Do I?

- What's the occasion?

- Oh. Just treating myself.

- Hey, is Beau around?

- Day off from here.

He'll be on one of his other jobs.

What are you up to today?

- Uh, well, Mum's ignoring me,

so I'm having to take matters into my own hands.

Do you have any fish guts? [gags and coughs]

Sorry.

Oh man. Sorry. - [Sharyn] It's fine.

It's fine. - Sorry.

So do you want me to keep pretending

that you're not pregnant?

Because I'm a, I'm a pretty good liar.

I can. - No, it's alright, love.

- Do you not want it?

- Oh God, no, the opposite.

I want it more than anything in the world.

- So why?

- I just don't wanna jinx it.

I had two miscarriages after Lauren

so I thought, oh well, that's that then.

- I'm so sorry.

- But we're very close now.

I've always wanted three kids.

The best things come in threes.

Hanson, triangles, the three little pigs,

Tom Cruise's wives.

- [Both] Nicole Kidman and Katie Holmes.

- Yeah, Katie Holmes. - Yeah and everyone forgets

Mimi Rogers.

- Who the fuck is Mimi Rogers?

- Mm.

- Careful.

- Manu, and I had a chat and we're happy to go through

with the Rosewood option.

- Great.

Catering? - No changes.

- You could lose the soup entree.

- They might love soup.

- I've never had soup at a funeral.

- It's part of the deluxe package.

- Which we can modify.

The memorial book, for instance.

Sometimes it's more meaningful to make it yourself.

- Or sometimes it's just nice to have a professional

do it for you.

- I could make the book.

- Fine, but we're having the soup.

- Well, that just leaves the dove release.

- The what?

- A white dove symbolizing Brent's spirit released

at the end of the service.

- I'm happy to let that go.

- Actually it's more of a two-person job.

- No, I mean, we don't need that.

- We absolutely do.

- It's the soup or the dove, Moira.

- Don't put me in this position.

- A real Sophie's Choice.

- [Dean] Well, we got there in the end.

- The deluxe package isn't so deluxe

now you've talked them out of everything.

- Ollie and Manu couldn't afford it.

- Well, they're going with the Rosewood

so it can't be that bad.

- Yes, 'cause I said we'd do the casket at cost.

- What?

That's two grand gone.

- Yeah, it's not all about the money.

- Since when?

We're running a business, Dean.

- Yeah, since Hemi.

This is the sort of thing he'd do for people.

- Yeah and look where at got him.

He was almost bankrupt.

I want this place to be successful.

- It is successful.

We haven't been this busy in years.

- Yes, and we need all that cash

for the reno so we can attract the right people.

- [Gwen] Awkward.

I could hear you guys fighting.

Where were you this morning?

- Muay Thai.

- Muay Thai?

piss off.

Oh my God. - Why are you here?

- Fight me.

- [Ellie] No.

- What's the point of doing Muay Thai if you won't fight me?

- Keeps me fit and it's social.

- Okay, who is your best Muay Thai friend?

- Rhonda.

- Did you say Rhonda?

There's no way she's under 50.

- Gwen, why are you here?

- Okay, so,

I found Stu on Facebook.

- And? - And

he's clearly using Mum for her money.

He's a farmer.

He farms grapes.

- Like on a vineyard?

He probably owns a vineyard.

- Well, he dies his hair.

Mm-hmm.

In 2018 it was salt and pepper,

and now, miraculously, it's all pepper, no salt.

- Okay, you need to sort this out with Mum.

- Yeah, well she's ignoring my texts.

- Welcome to my world.

Look, go home, get your stuff together,

and I'll drop you around there tonight.

Okay, you two will work it out.

- Did Rhonda kick you in the head?

I'm not living with Stu.

If Mum won't make him leave, I will.

I just need some fish guts and one of Dean's CDs.

So is this, these your ones?

- Uh.

- Why don't you channel your energy

into something productive like finding a job?

- Okay, look.

[joyful piano plays]

Um,

I'm telling you this as a friend, okay?

Some shit's about to go down

and either you are in on the operation

or you're out.

- I'm a 100% out.

I do not want to be involved.

I'm busy and I also don't care.

- Okay, well that's your choice.

You're not in the loop.

Out of the loop.

Totally out of the loop, okay?

- Oh, that's 22.50.

- Yeah, I'll pay you back.

What time will you be making dinner?

- I won't be making dinner.

I've got a date tonight.

- Who are you?

Commence Operation Stu-pid. [Gwen laughs]

Hm.

Hm.

[typing on phone]

[dial tone]

[phone vibrating]

- Can I just check your ID please?

- Uh, yep,

yes.

- Bro, this is so bad.

- Oh, uh, no worries, I'll just...

- Ask me for a beer.

- Can I have a beer?

- Deeper.

[clears throat]

- Can I have a beer?

- Yeah, you'll be sweet.

- Oh! - Just take it easy, yeah?

- Yeah, cheers, bro.

- But have fun.

- Yeah.

[phone vibrating] - All good, Chantel?

Not driving home, eh?

Better be Uber.

[dial tone]

- [Voicemail] Please leave a message after the tone.

[sighs]

- Hello my old friend.

[upbeat orchestral music]

[faint indistinct chatter]

- Hey, don't just wave at me put out the fire!

[groans]

Dumb twat.

[somber piano]

- As we come to the end of the service

I invite anyone to step forward and say a few words.

In that case.

Oh yes please.

- Hi,

I'm Ollie,

Brent's brother.

He was such an asshole.

[Manu lightly chuckles]

Sorry. I shouldn't have led with that.

I remember when we were kids.

Once we got Mr. Whippy

and um, before the van had even driven off

I dropped my sherbet cone,

but Brent had ordered a double so he let me eat half.

That was nice.

Most of the time he was just awful,

but I'm, I'm still sad that he's gone.

Not that I'm gonna miss him.

Just,

we never got a chance to fix things.

Just always held that hope.

Anyway, thank you everyone for coming.

It's been a lovely service.

Moira, realistically, never gonna see you again,

but I hope you have a nice life.

Okay.

Bye.

- [softly] I love you.

- Love you too.

[kisses]

- Thank you, Ollie.

[Dean scat singing]

- [Dean] [Singing] I sing sweet love songs all night.

- [Ellie] When did we get a chocolate fountain?

- Oh, it's mine.

It's new.

[Dean continues singing]

- And since when do we do live jazz?

- [Dean] [singing] Nobody, uh, and nobody

'cause for me.

[scat singing]

[singing intensifies]

[everyone clapping]

- Thanks everyone.

Uh, look, I'm gonna take a quick five,

so don't go anywhere.

[soft chuckles] Alright.

- I didn't realize singing was part of the deluxe package.

- Oh, I just threw that in there for you guys.

I knew you couldn't afford the good stuff

but I didn't want you to miss out.

- Thank you, Dean.

You've been so generous.

- Seriously, thanks to you two

we can still afford a honeymoon.

- Oh no, you're very welcome.

- Um, heard you guys have Facebook?

- Oh, we are rebranding, so it is in a transitional phase.

- Well, we would love to leave a good review.

- Well, I can send the link when it goes live.

- Hey, random question:

has that guy ever modeled?

- [Ellie] Beau?

- I've done a bit of modeling.

- Um, I'm not sure, but he is looking for extra work.

- They're great, aren't they?

- Yeah.

- Kinda makes it all worthwhile, doesn't it?

- Mm.

- Oh, better get back up there.

[indistinct group chatter]

[Dean plays piano]

[Dean scat singing continues]

- Remember stilts?

- Uh huh.

- Someone was just giving them away on Marketplace.

They even dropped them off.

- Place is a mess.

You've got to stop doing this.

- I really wish you had higher ceilings.

I wanna go outside,

but I'm afraid of falling on the concrete.

- Gwen, what did you do today?

Besides the stilts?

- Uh, well, I could go into it,

but you'd have to sign an NDA

because you don't have clearance for Operation Stu-Pid.

- Are you taking your pills?

- Yes. - Good.

It's just,

you haven't left the house in a week.

- That's not true.

I went to the dairy for Skittles.

- You need to find a job, Gwen.

Do you not want to be a DJ anymore?

[Gwen sighs]

- I don't know. I guess,

[scoffs]

I just feel

like. - Can you come down?

Sorry, I'm just finding it really hard

to take you seriously in those.

- I'm gonna need your help.

I'll try it on the wall.

Can you need help?

- Yes.

- I have to,

if you catch my bum.

- No, I don't have you.

- Okay, okay, I can't.

This is, okay, stop it. - Hang on, I have to hold ya.

- [Ellie] I have not got you.

- Okay, I'm gonna need to use your bed.

I'm gonna need to use your bed.

I've been on these for hours.

I had to piss in the sink.

- Oh, Gwen.

[grunts]

Why did you sell your DJ decks?

- Because I wasn't using them.

- Why? - [Ellie] You know why.

I wasn't getting any gigs.

Even for really good DJs it's super competitive, so.

- I saw on your Instagram you did a gig though, right?

You had the headphones and the waka waka.

- I did one gig

at an internet cafe.

- But. - Don't feel sorry for me,

it's fine.

[stammers] I had a great holiday.

I had a very, very fun time.

It's just

now I'm back where I started,

except poor

and I don't know what to do.

What do I do?

- Well, something's come up at work

that I think you'd be quite good for.

- I don't want a real job.

- We need a social media manager.

- Oh yeah?

- We're having a bit of a brand refresh

and we want more of an online presence.

- Yeah, I often think that when I'm scrolling

like what's my favorite funeral home up to today.

- Do you want the job or not?

- Yes.

- Alright, well, if you want a ride,

I leave at 6:30 for Muay Thai

and then I go straight from there to work.

- Okay. [sharp exhale]

- Oh! - You do do Muay Thai.

- Yeah, I do.

[joyful piano music plays]