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1
00:00:00,393 --> 00:00:02,087
Jim, I have brought your children
2
00:00:02,098 --> 00:00:03,640
back home safe and sound.
3
00:00:03,641 --> 00:00:05,767
Excellent. I hope everybody's hungry.
4
00:00:05,768 --> 00:00:07,561
I have a homemade lasagna,
5
00:00:07,562 --> 00:00:09,812
straight from the Stop
& Shop freezer section.
6
00:00:09,813 --> 00:00:11,690
Dad, I know I've been away all day,
7
00:00:11,691 --> 00:00:13,066
but can I go to Cody's?
8
00:00:13,067 --> 00:00:14,443
There's a "Fortnite" tourney.
9
00:00:14,444 --> 00:00:17,738
Plus, Cody's mom makes
food that was never frozen.
10
00:00:17,739 --> 00:00:19,281
Sure. Have fun.
11
00:00:19,282 --> 00:00:21,658
Dad, I know that you went
through a lot of trouble
12
00:00:21,659 --> 00:00:25,203
to make the money that
bought that lasagna,
13
00:00:25,204 --> 00:00:28,373
but Katie invited me for a sleepover.
14
00:00:28,374 --> 00:00:31,084
It was great spending
a quality 35 seconds
15
00:00:31,085 --> 00:00:32,836
with both of you today.
16
00:00:32,837 --> 00:00:34,254
Dad, I hope you're hungry.
17
00:00:34,255 --> 00:00:36,423
Thanks, Jim, but I got
a date with Rose tonight.
18
00:00:36,424 --> 00:00:38,301
We're gonna Netflix and chill.
19
00:00:40,428 --> 00:00:42,346
You know that means have sex?
20
00:00:42,347 --> 00:00:43,397
I do.
21
00:00:44,687 --> 00:00:46,555
I was trying to be discreet.
22
00:00:46,556 --> 00:00:49,519
Well, there's no need
for this to go to waste.
23
00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,169
If you wanna take some to Rose, you can.
24
00:00:51,170 --> 00:00:54,283
Yes! Rose can't call me cheap anymore.
25
00:00:54,734 --> 00:00:56,653
Can you spare a bottle of wine?
26
00:00:56,664 --> 00:00:57,809
Sure. Take one of those.
27
00:00:57,820 --> 00:00:58,988
Thanks.
28
00:00:58,999 --> 00:01:01,501
I should probably grab one for Rose too.
29
00:01:02,853 --> 00:01:05,022
Always thinking of others.
30
00:01:05,443 --> 00:01:08,098
So, uh, you and Rose
are getting serious?
31
00:01:08,109 --> 00:01:12,627
As of last night, we've made
love six and a half times.
32
00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:16,538
That really amazes
me to hear a fraction.
33
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,621
Too bad you don't have a date
lined up for tonight, Jim.
34
00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:22,498
You know, it's never been easier.
35
00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:24,835
I'm on seven different dating apps now.
36
00:01:24,836 --> 00:01:25,879
Does Rose know that?
37
00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:27,213
She's on nine.
38
00:01:28,121 --> 00:01:31,291
At our age, you gotta have a deep bench.
39
00:01:31,686 --> 00:01:33,426
Well, those dating apps.
40
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,385
I-I like meeting women out in the wild.
41
00:01:35,386 --> 00:01:37,972
You know, everybody on dating
apps is looking for a date.
42
00:01:37,973 --> 00:01:40,099
I wanna meet someone who's
not looking for a date,
43
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,227
but who finds one anyway.
44
00:01:43,655 --> 00:01:46,491
I'm not just saying this
because I'm your father.
45
00:01:46,502 --> 00:01:49,630
Somebody out there would
be lucky to settle for you.
46
00:01:51,835 --> 00:01:53,837
Kids, let's go!
47
00:01:54,030 --> 00:01:56,532
Enjoy your sleepovers, everyone.
48
00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:57,742
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
49
00:01:57,743 --> 00:01:59,493
You know I will.
50
00:01:59,494 --> 00:02:03,122
Tonight, we're gonna try to
go from six and a half to seven.
51
00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:04,541
You wanna know how?
52
00:02:05,739 --> 00:02:08,416
I desperately, desperately do not.
53
00:02:09,056 --> 00:02:11,725
? It's true ?
54
00:02:11,736 --> 00:02:15,865
? The marriage that we
once had now is through ?
55
00:02:15,876 --> 00:02:19,880
? And now we're doing
all that we can do ?
56
00:02:20,087 --> 00:02:24,717
? To keep us all together as a crew ?
57
00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:28,522
? Just do as we say, not as we do ?
58
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:32,526
? We really thought that we were done ?
59
00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:34,905
? But we've just begun ?
60
00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,208
Chilly in here, huh?
61
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:48,709
Oh, I know.
62
00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:51,087
I just saw a family of four
hugging a rotisserie chicken
63
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:52,713
to stay warm.
64
00:02:52,714 --> 00:02:56,343
[LAUGHING]
65
00:02:58,820 --> 00:03:00,277
I like those prAna pants.
66
00:03:00,288 --> 00:03:01,831
Do you do yoga?
67
00:03:03,253 --> 00:03:04,809
I do not do yoga.
68
00:03:04,810 --> 00:03:07,728
And I had no idea they were yoga pants.
69
00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:09,563
I got them from Julia, and I wear them
70
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,973
because they are
deliciously buttery soft.
71
00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:14,068
Look, I don't want to lie to this woman,
72
00:03:14,069 --> 00:03:15,736
but on the other hand,
I feel like, you know,
73
00:03:15,737 --> 00:03:17,488
I might have a little
nibble on the line here,
74
00:03:17,489 --> 00:03:19,147
and I don't wanna scare off the fish...
75
00:03:19,148 --> 00:03:21,609
which I realize is an outdated metaphor,
76
00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:23,661
reducing a human being to something
77
00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:27,415
that can be, essentially,
hunted with a worm.
78
00:03:27,416 --> 00:03:29,834
But since I've already used it,
79
00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,085
I got a live one.
80
00:03:31,086 --> 00:03:33,264
Uh... [CHUCKLES]
81
00:03:33,742 --> 00:03:36,245
Do I do yoga?
82
00:03:36,246 --> 00:03:38,066
Seems like everyone's doing yoga now.
83
00:03:38,067 --> 00:03:40,236
Not a lie. I repeated a question
84
00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:41,805
and stated a fact.
85
00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:44,890
It's nice to run into a yogi
86
00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:48,686
in the barren wasteland of frozen food.
87
00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,605
I keep telling myself I
should remain in produce,
88
00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:55,943
but oh, these chicken pot pies.
89
00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,862
Oh, you have... cheers.
90
00:03:57,863 --> 00:04:00,072
[BOTH LAUGH]
91
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:02,491
You ever go to the
Blissful Elephant studio?
92
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,994
No, but, uh, I've
definitely heard about it.
93
00:04:04,995 --> 00:04:06,257
Also not a lie.
94
00:04:06,268 --> 00:04:08,478
She just said it, and I just heard it.
95
00:04:08,479 --> 00:04:09,919
Where do you practice?
96
00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:11,672
Giggling Goat. Yoga Hut.
97
00:04:11,749 --> 00:04:13,834
I know... you're a Dancing Shiva dude.
98
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,543
[LAUGHS]
99
00:04:15,553 --> 00:04:17,254
That... that is a great guess.
100
00:04:17,265 --> 00:04:18,673
I assume.
101
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:21,802
What's your favorite class over there?
102
00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:24,680
Ah, I really can't say. [CHUCKLES]
103
00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:26,449
And I really couldn't say
104
00:04:26,460 --> 00:04:29,463
because I had no idea
what I was talking about.
105
00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:31,353
Who's your favorite teacher?
106
00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,563
Mm, names.
107
00:04:32,564 --> 00:04:34,429
Oh, God, I'm so bad with names.
108
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:35,858
Um...
109
00:04:36,043 --> 00:04:40,006
names are... are just
clothing for the soul.
110
00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:45,065
That's deep. You sound like a true yogi.
111
00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:46,703
Thank you.
112
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:50,831
Uh, my Western name is Jim.
113
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:55,002
But my soul will answer to anything
114
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:57,004
delivered with kindness.
115
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,382
Oh.
116
00:05:00,984 --> 00:05:02,110
Kristen.
117
00:05:02,121 --> 00:05:03,497
Oh.
118
00:05:03,899 --> 00:05:05,276
It was nice to...
119
00:05:05,277 --> 00:05:07,848
If you ever wanna try Blissful Elephant,
120
00:05:07,849 --> 00:05:09,559
I'm there Sundays at 9:00 a.m.
121
00:05:09,660 --> 00:05:12,520
Oh, all right. 9:00 a.m. Sunday.
122
00:05:12,521 --> 00:05:15,314
You know, I'm... I'll
start stretching now.
123
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:16,649
Great. I-I...
124
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:18,401
I don't wanna sound too woo-woo,
125
00:05:18,402 --> 00:05:20,528
but this class has really changed
126
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:22,321
my conversation with the world.
127
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,805
You know, that is not woo-woo.
128
00:05:23,816 --> 00:05:25,401
That's... that's wahoo.
129
00:05:25,402 --> 00:05:27,985
You know, me and the world,
we can talk all night.
130
00:05:27,986 --> 00:05:30,955
You know, yap, yap,
yap. No, you go, world.
131
00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:33,457
No, you go, Jim. [HIGH-PITCHED LAUGH]
132
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:35,418
You're hysterical, Jim. No you, world!
133
00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:37,253
Ha ha!
134
00:05:37,254 --> 00:05:40,506
I-I really hope I see you
at the Elephant on Sunday.
135
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,383
Maybe I'll bring my friend, the world.
136
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:43,760
Okay.
137
00:05:45,269 --> 00:05:46,463
Kearney got a bite.
138
00:05:49,134 --> 00:05:50,184
[GRUNTING]
139
00:05:52,980 --> 00:05:55,106
Should I call 911?
140
00:05:55,107 --> 00:05:57,984
Yeah, and tell them you
entered without knocking.
141
00:05:57,985 --> 00:06:00,029
Sorry, I left my license on the dresser.
142
00:06:00,275 --> 00:06:01,588
Are you doing yoga?
143
00:06:01,599 --> 00:06:02,661
I am.
144
00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,824
Turns out I have a gift
for the stretchy art.
145
00:06:04,825 --> 00:06:06,785
- What's her name?
- Kristen.
146
00:06:06,786 --> 00:06:08,536
We were flirting at NutriNook.
147
00:06:08,537 --> 00:06:10,664
So I'm gonna meet her for yoga on Sunday
148
00:06:10,665 --> 00:06:12,958
at the Blissful Elephant at 9:00 a.m.
149
00:06:12,959 --> 00:06:14,125
Unreal.
150
00:06:14,126 --> 00:06:16,336
For years, I tried
to get you to do yoga,
151
00:06:16,337 --> 00:06:17,796
and you chose watching baseball,
152
00:06:17,797 --> 00:06:20,382
golf, and napping every time.
153
00:06:20,383 --> 00:06:23,426
The couch is an
ever-beckoning mistress.
154
00:06:23,427 --> 00:06:26,262
And the TV is her trampy best friend.
155
00:06:26,263 --> 00:06:28,723
And I don't recall you
ever asking me to do yoga.
156
00:06:28,724 --> 00:06:29,975
Oh.
157
00:06:29,976 --> 00:06:31,142
I have proof.
158
00:06:31,143 --> 00:06:33,521
Proof? Were you wearing a wire?
159
00:06:35,803 --> 00:06:37,096
Ha!
160
00:06:37,107 --> 00:06:38,542
Remember this book?
161
00:06:38,553 --> 00:06:41,323
"Hold Me Close: A Marital
Guide to Reignite Passion"?
162
00:06:41,445 --> 00:06:43,001
Definitely not.
163
00:06:43,656 --> 00:06:46,658
The book encouraged us to
make a list of some things
164
00:06:46,659 --> 00:06:47,784
you wish your spouse would do to restore
165
00:06:47,785 --> 00:06:49,327
the bonds of your marriage.
166
00:06:49,328 --> 00:06:50,996
Wait, you actually did that?
167
00:06:50,997 --> 00:06:52,122
Yes!
168
00:06:52,123 --> 00:06:53,415
[SCOFFS]
169
00:06:53,416 --> 00:06:54,499
Uh...
170
00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:56,001
okay, here it is.
171
00:06:56,002 --> 00:06:58,963
Number 26: "I wish
Jim did yoga with me."
172
00:06:59,260 --> 00:07:04,005
So you're saying that if
I had done yoga back then,
173
00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:06,018
I'd be prepared for this date?
174
00:07:07,028 --> 00:07:09,514
Kristen's gonna know that
175
00:07:09,515 --> 00:07:10,724
I've never done yoga before, isn't she?
176
00:07:10,725 --> 00:07:12,350
I'm sure she's not expecting you
177
00:07:12,351 --> 00:07:13,685
to be some great yogi.
178
00:07:13,686 --> 00:07:15,353
Well, she may have gotten the impression
179
00:07:15,354 --> 00:07:16,675
that I was a yogi.
180
00:07:16,676 --> 00:07:17,716
How?
181
00:07:17,717 --> 00:07:20,553
From me giving her the
impression I was a yogi.
182
00:07:20,554 --> 00:07:23,236
I got excited 'cause it
seemed like she was liking me,
183
00:07:23,237 --> 00:07:25,864
and I just wanted things to
keep going in the direction
184
00:07:25,865 --> 00:07:28,283
of her liking me because
that's not a bad direction
185
00:07:28,284 --> 00:07:29,534
for my life to head in.
186
00:07:29,535 --> 00:07:32,037
I mean, one day the
kids will leave the nest,
187
00:07:32,038 --> 00:07:35,207
and you and Trey will be off
on some superyacht somewhere,
188
00:07:35,208 --> 00:07:37,876
and Dad and Rose will be in
an assisted living facility,
189
00:07:37,877 --> 00:07:40,157
fractioning one another's brains out.
190
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:43,147
And I just wanna meet
somebody before my sex life
191
00:07:43,220 --> 00:07:45,275
starts measuring in halves.
192
00:07:46,093 --> 00:07:48,219
Jim, you are gonna meet someone.
193
00:07:48,220 --> 00:07:49,836
You are wildly likeable.
194
00:07:49,847 --> 00:07:51,556
Yeah, except when I'm doing yoga.
195
00:07:51,557 --> 00:07:53,980
You are naturally flexible. It's true.
196
00:07:53,991 --> 00:07:55,618
- I know, right?
- Mm-hmm.
197
00:07:55,728 --> 00:07:58,730
But I... I just don't know how to yoga.
198
00:07:58,731 --> 00:08:01,941
I mean, she's gonna know
that I'm a fraud, unless...
199
00:08:01,942 --> 00:08:03,443
What?
200
00:08:03,444 --> 00:08:06,571
Well, remember how you used to want me
201
00:08:06,572 --> 00:08:07,864
to do yoga with you?
202
00:08:07,865 --> 00:08:10,408
I mean, like, so much
that you wrote down
203
00:08:10,409 --> 00:08:12,702
a wish list with it?
204
00:08:12,703 --> 00:08:18,083
Well, Julia, I'm gonna make
wish number 26 come true.
205
00:08:18,084 --> 00:08:19,834
You want me to come to yoga with you
206
00:08:19,835 --> 00:08:20,919
and be your yoga whisperer?
207
00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:23,546
Oh, my God, what a great idea!
208
00:08:23,547 --> 00:08:25,757
[BRIGHT ROCK MUSIC]
209
00:08:25,758 --> 00:08:27,717
And Jim was like, I don't remember
210
00:08:27,718 --> 00:08:29,427
you asking me to do yoga.
211
00:08:29,428 --> 00:08:30,762
So I showed him proof.
212
00:08:30,763 --> 00:08:32,639
Proof?
213
00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:35,100
What, were you wearing a wire?
214
00:08:35,101 --> 00:08:36,643
No, "Hold Me Close."
215
00:08:36,644 --> 00:08:38,395
With pleasure.
216
00:08:38,396 --> 00:08:40,981
[LAUGHING]
217
00:08:40,982 --> 00:08:42,732
No.
218
00:08:42,733 --> 00:08:44,693
That's the name of the
book that I got Jim and I
219
00:08:44,694 --> 00:08:46,611
for us to save our marriage.
220
00:08:46,612 --> 00:08:48,823
Did you try to get a refund?
221
00:08:50,491 --> 00:08:52,701
Look here. My wish list,
222
00:08:52,702 --> 00:08:55,662
number 26, which is
"would do yoga with me."
223
00:08:55,663 --> 00:08:58,790
So Sunday, I'm gonna
be his yoga whisperer,
224
00:08:58,791 --> 00:09:01,042
9:00 a.m. at the Blissful Elephant.
225
00:09:01,043 --> 00:09:03,754
Jim gets list. Jim never reads list.
226
00:09:05,172 --> 00:09:06,798
Bad for him, good for me.
227
00:09:06,799 --> 00:09:08,758
Unnecessary for us.
228
00:09:08,759 --> 00:09:10,927
Okay... she's jumping! Oh, God!
229
00:09:10,928 --> 00:09:12,304
[LAUGHS]
230
00:09:12,305 --> 00:09:14,556
? ?
231
00:09:14,557 --> 00:09:16,641
I realize that this
wish list was written
232
00:09:16,642 --> 00:09:21,229
for Jim and not for me, but, uh...
233
00:09:21,230 --> 00:09:23,106
this is a cheat code.
234
00:09:23,107 --> 00:09:26,359
? ?
235
00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:29,863
Mr. Kearney, here's your
ten-class Bliss Passport.
236
00:09:29,864 --> 00:09:31,698
We'll stamp it for each blissful journey
237
00:09:31,699 --> 00:09:33,074
you take with us.
238
00:09:33,075 --> 00:09:34,492
Well, I look forward to increasing
239
00:09:34,493 --> 00:09:35,660
my stretching abilities.
240
00:09:35,661 --> 00:09:38,496
[SOFT ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING]
241
00:09:38,497 --> 00:09:41,249
[EXHALES DEEPLY] Ananda.
242
00:09:41,250 --> 00:09:43,544
[CLAPS] Jim.
243
00:09:47,340 --> 00:09:48,590
Have a blissful journey.
244
00:09:48,591 --> 00:09:50,134
Thank you, Ananda.
245
00:09:52,219 --> 00:09:53,511
Ooh.
246
00:09:53,512 --> 00:09:56,514
Yoga world's a little
more balmy than I thought.
247
00:09:56,515 --> 00:09:58,516
And Kristen's not here.
248
00:09:58,517 --> 00:10:00,977
Let's stay at the back of the class.
249
00:10:00,978 --> 00:10:03,271
25 bucks a class, turn up the AC.
250
00:10:03,272 --> 00:10:05,857
Am I right? [CHUCKLES]
251
00:10:05,858 --> 00:10:07,651
Right here is good
because no matter where
252
00:10:07,652 --> 00:10:09,694
Kristen puts her mat, she won't
be able to see you back here.
253
00:10:09,695 --> 00:10:11,071
Oh, yeah.
254
00:10:11,072 --> 00:10:13,907
And that way, I can get
a good look at her...
255
00:10:13,908 --> 00:10:15,450
actually, why am I not saying it?
256
00:10:15,451 --> 00:10:17,077
You and I are not married anymore.
257
00:10:17,078 --> 00:10:18,870
Her butt.
258
00:10:18,871 --> 00:10:21,832
I want a clean, unobstructed
view of her butt.
259
00:10:23,417 --> 00:10:25,168
Dear God, is it hot.
260
00:10:25,169 --> 00:10:26,879
Maybe because I'm here.
261
00:10:27,140 --> 00:10:29,464
What are you doing here?
262
00:10:29,465 --> 00:10:31,007
Number 18:
263
00:10:31,008 --> 00:10:34,052
"I sometimes wish affection
was expressed poetically."
264
00:10:34,053 --> 00:10:37,055
Baby, I love you so much
that when I'm away from you,
265
00:10:37,056 --> 00:10:39,349
there's an ache in my heart
that can only be soothed
266
00:10:39,350 --> 00:10:41,935
by the radiance of your face.
267
00:10:41,936 --> 00:10:44,729
Are you day drinking?
268
00:10:44,730 --> 00:10:49,359
Yeah, and I'm day drunk
off a case of Julia.
269
00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,946
Watch the hangover on that.
270
00:10:53,781 --> 00:10:55,532
- Mwah.
- Go right there.
271
00:10:55,533 --> 00:10:57,242
I wanna get a clean, unobstructed view
272
00:10:57,243 --> 00:10:58,661
of your butt.
273
00:11:00,955 --> 00:11:03,123
Good morning, beautiful souls.
274
00:11:03,124 --> 00:11:04,874
That's her.
275
00:11:04,875 --> 00:11:06,835
- The teacher?
- Yeah.
276
00:11:06,836 --> 00:11:08,211
[SCOFFS] Dude.
277
00:11:08,212 --> 00:11:09,421
Don't "dude" me.
278
00:11:09,422 --> 00:11:11,006
She... when she told
me this was her class,
279
00:11:11,007 --> 00:11:13,008
she meant it was her class.
280
00:11:13,009 --> 00:11:14,926
Oh, my... she's gonna know I'm a fraud.
281
00:11:14,927 --> 00:11:16,177
Welcome to hot yoga.
282
00:11:16,178 --> 00:11:20,098
Huh! So that's why it's so hot!
283
00:11:20,099 --> 00:11:21,933
Jim, you didn't mention it was hot yoga.
284
00:11:21,934 --> 00:11:23,101
This stuff is intense.
285
00:11:23,102 --> 00:11:24,782
Well, I'm gonna make a break for it.
286
00:11:25,730 --> 00:11:27,397
Jim!
287
00:11:27,398 --> 00:11:28,606
I'm glad you could make it.
288
00:11:28,607 --> 00:11:30,775
Kristen. Uh, yes.
289
00:11:30,776 --> 00:11:32,193
Yes, I'm just, uh...
290
00:11:32,194 --> 00:11:34,863
I'm just closing this door to, uh,
291
00:11:34,864 --> 00:11:39,452
trap in the blissfully
debilitating heat.
292
00:11:43,475 --> 00:11:44,608
[GONG REVERBERATES]
293
00:11:45,630 --> 00:11:47,047
Sat nam.
294
00:11:47,048 --> 00:11:49,841
- ALL: Sat nam.
- [STRAINED] Sat nam.
295
00:11:49,842 --> 00:11:53,220
Today we'll practice the
Surya Namaskar sequence
296
00:11:53,221 --> 00:11:55,973
used for centuries in India
to train young warriors.
297
00:11:55,974 --> 00:11:58,100
Oh.
298
00:11:58,101 --> 00:11:59,686
Oh! Hello.
299
00:12:02,272 --> 00:12:03,855
For those of you who are new,
300
00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,899
we heat the room to 105 degrees,
301
00:12:05,900 --> 00:12:07,442
which would have been a nice, breezy day
302
00:12:07,443 --> 00:12:08,610
for young Indian warriors.
303
00:12:08,611 --> 00:12:10,612
[LAUGHTER]
304
00:12:10,613 --> 00:12:12,000
Why is that funny?
305
00:12:12,011 --> 00:12:13,888
Yoga humor.
306
00:12:14,075 --> 00:12:16,452
Are you ready?
307
00:12:16,707 --> 00:12:17,953
ALL: Ha!
308
00:12:17,954 --> 00:12:19,122
[FEEBLY] Ha!
309
00:12:21,132 --> 00:12:22,801
Inhale, arms up.
310
00:12:23,001 --> 00:12:24,710
Exhale, fold.
311
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:26,628
Inhale, halfway lift...
312
00:12:26,629 --> 00:12:29,548
[UPBEAT TECHNO MUSIC]
313
00:12:29,549 --> 00:12:36,638
? ?
314
00:12:36,639 --> 00:12:38,140
Exhale, adho mukha svanasana.
315
00:12:38,141 --> 00:12:40,267
And jumping back up to standing.
316
00:12:40,268 --> 00:12:43,145
And again, we... did I hear someone say,
317
00:12:43,146 --> 00:12:45,147
"Kristen, brr, I'm chilly-chill-chill"?
318
00:12:45,148 --> 00:12:48,233
Okay then, let's turn up the heat.
319
00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:50,819
And again, going through the sequence.
320
00:12:50,820 --> 00:12:53,488
Smooth breath. Engage your core.
321
00:12:53,489 --> 00:12:54,907
Wow.
322
00:12:54,908 --> 00:12:56,958
Looks like we have a
warrior in our midst.
323
00:12:57,155 --> 00:12:58,327
Yes, you do.
324
00:12:58,328 --> 00:12:59,828
Number 22:
325
00:12:59,829 --> 00:13:02,664
"I wish my husband would show enthusiasm
326
00:13:02,665 --> 00:13:04,124
for new challenges."
327
00:13:04,125 --> 00:13:06,042
This is such a challenge.
328
00:13:07,003 --> 00:13:08,713
I'm so enthused.
329
00:13:10,215 --> 00:13:13,050
Okay, let's work on some
specifics of our form.
330
00:13:13,051 --> 00:13:14,635
Could someone help me demonstrate?
331
00:13:14,636 --> 00:13:15,686
Number seven:
332
00:13:15,687 --> 00:13:17,721
"I wish my husband
would volunteer more."
333
00:13:17,722 --> 00:13:19,049
I volunteer.
334
00:13:20,139 --> 00:13:21,225
Oh, our warrior.
335
00:13:21,226 --> 00:13:22,276
Come on up.
336
00:13:24,979 --> 00:13:26,438
Come on into plank for me.
337
00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:27,774
Oh.
338
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:31,276
- Gorgeous.
- Gorgeous?
339
00:13:31,277 --> 00:13:33,654
See how everything is on the same plane?
340
00:13:33,655 --> 00:13:35,989
Straight as a warrior's sword.
341
00:13:35,990 --> 00:13:38,533
Why is she talking about his sword?
342
00:13:38,534 --> 00:13:40,994
She likes 'em straight.
343
00:13:40,995 --> 00:13:45,207
Now, when my warrior lowers
into chaturanga dandasana,
344
00:13:45,208 --> 00:13:49,169
all his body will kiss
the earth simultaneously.
345
00:13:49,170 --> 00:13:50,587
Fantastic.
346
00:13:50,588 --> 00:13:52,089
When is the first water break?
347
00:13:52,090 --> 00:13:55,968
Let's give our special
warrior a round of applause.
348
00:13:55,969 --> 00:13:58,887
[APPLAUSE]
349
00:13:58,888 --> 00:14:01,223
What? This is too slow for you all?
350
00:14:01,224 --> 00:14:02,724
You wanna double-time it?
351
00:14:02,725 --> 00:14:04,560
No. No... nobody said double-time.
352
00:14:04,561 --> 00:14:05,686
Nobody said anything.
353
00:14:05,687 --> 00:14:07,355
Who is talking to her?
354
00:14:08,706 --> 00:14:10,875
Okay, if you insist, here we go.
355
00:14:12,344 --> 00:14:13,402
ALL: Ha!
356
00:14:13,403 --> 00:14:14,779
[FEEBLY] Ha!
357
00:14:16,114 --> 00:14:17,906
If anything is too challenging,
358
00:14:17,907 --> 00:14:20,242
child's pose is always a great option.
359
00:14:20,243 --> 00:14:22,244
You know what else is an option, lady?
360
00:14:22,245 --> 00:14:24,595
Keeping your hands off
other people's swords.
361
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:29,167
[APPLAUSE]
362
00:14:29,168 --> 00:14:30,210
That was amazing.
363
00:14:30,211 --> 00:14:31,963
Don't you guys feel invigorated?
364
00:14:33,798 --> 00:14:35,757
Jim, I-I should have warned you
365
00:14:35,758 --> 00:14:37,259
how hard this class was.
366
00:14:37,260 --> 00:14:42,264
I felt so bad every time
I looked over at you.
367
00:14:42,265 --> 00:14:44,266
You know how they say,
don't let them see you sweat?
368
00:14:44,267 --> 00:14:46,768
Well, uh, clearly whatever sociopath
369
00:14:46,769 --> 00:14:49,563
invented hot yoga did not...
370
00:14:49,564 --> 00:14:51,244
I forgot the rest of that sentence.
371
00:14:52,449 --> 00:14:53,616
Hey... hey, Kristen.
372
00:14:53,627 --> 00:14:55,254
Um, what are you doing later?
373
00:14:55,403 --> 00:14:56,945
You wanna grab a cup of coffee?
374
00:14:56,946 --> 00:14:58,822
Oh, I don't drink coffee.
375
00:14:58,823 --> 00:15:01,366
How about a couple of gallons of water?
376
00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,702
We can go any place that serves water.
377
00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:05,329
Hey.
378
00:15:05,330 --> 00:15:07,289
- That was a great class.
- [GRUNTS]
379
00:15:07,290 --> 00:15:08,340
[GRUNTS]
380
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:09,625
Thanks for being my warrior today.
381
00:15:09,626 --> 00:15:11,668
Any time.
382
00:15:11,669 --> 00:15:13,671
I'll see you at home. Namaste, baby.
383
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:17,959
Yoga is such a gift.
384
00:15:18,311 --> 00:15:20,135
It's so good for your heart.
385
00:15:20,136 --> 00:15:22,024
Is it, Ananda?
386
00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:24,723
Is it?
387
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:27,309
Yeah, is it?
388
00:15:27,310 --> 00:15:29,228
[BRIGHT ROCK MUSIC]
389
00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:30,812
Yeah, how about the way Trey was
390
00:15:30,813 --> 00:15:32,482
totally showing off for her?
391
00:15:32,483 --> 00:15:35,359
How would he like it if I
had been flirting with Ananda?
392
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:37,653
Oh, Ananda, thank you
for checking me in.
393
00:15:37,654 --> 00:15:39,988
I feel so safe and
secure in your capable,
394
00:15:39,989 --> 00:15:41,698
administrative hands.
395
00:15:41,699 --> 00:15:42,991
Oh, stamp my passport.
396
00:15:42,992 --> 00:15:44,701
Yeah, stamp it, right there.
397
00:15:44,702 --> 00:15:47,037
You got it. Right there.
Stamp it. Stamp it.
398
00:15:47,038 --> 00:15:48,956
Right there. Keep
stamping. Keep stamping.
399
00:15:48,957 --> 00:15:50,332
Stamp my bliss. Yeah.
400
00:15:50,333 --> 00:15:53,502
Yeah, I'm your little bliss miss.
401
00:15:53,503 --> 00:15:55,255
How'd you like that, Trey?
402
00:15:56,673 --> 00:15:57,849
I'm Jim.
403
00:15:58,730 --> 00:16:01,024
You know what I should
have said to Trey?
404
00:16:01,025 --> 00:16:02,886
"Don't you think you're
overdoing it a little bit?"
405
00:16:02,887 --> 00:16:04,179
And he would have said, "Overdoing it?
406
00:16:04,180 --> 00:16:05,722
I think you're overreacting, Julia."
407
00:16:05,723 --> 00:16:07,474
And I would have said, "Overreacting?
408
00:16:07,475 --> 00:16:09,351
I don't think so." And
then he'd go, "What?"
409
00:16:09,352 --> 00:16:10,686
and I'd go, "Yeah," and he'd go, "Pfft,"
410
00:16:10,687 --> 00:16:12,970
and I'd go, "Pssh."
411
00:16:13,361 --> 00:16:16,024
Are you having a fight in your head?
412
00:16:16,025 --> 00:16:17,704
Yeah. I always do.
413
00:16:17,715 --> 00:16:20,676
I like to map things
out mentally beforehand.
414
00:16:20,863 --> 00:16:22,269
This is why I always felt
415
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:24,365
like I entered our fights in the middle.
416
00:16:25,816 --> 00:16:27,494
If you're gonna argue with Trey,
417
00:16:27,495 --> 00:16:28,870
you should let him be there
418
00:16:28,871 --> 00:16:31,707
to defend himself from the get-go.
419
00:16:31,708 --> 00:16:33,208
You're right.
420
00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:36,420
I... I have to go argue
with Trey face-to-face.
421
00:16:36,421 --> 00:16:37,880
Good.
422
00:16:37,881 --> 00:16:40,174
Today should be a bad day for everybody.
423
00:16:42,051 --> 00:16:43,719
I mean... [COUGHS]
424
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:45,095
I gotta switch grocery stores
425
00:16:45,096 --> 00:16:47,222
so that I never see Kristen ever again.
426
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:49,433
I wish you never gave me
those stupid yoga pants.
427
00:16:49,434 --> 00:16:52,519
Oh, yeah. Blame it on a Christmas gift.
428
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:53,937
You know what, Jim?
429
00:16:53,938 --> 00:16:57,065
Kristen did seem genuinely
happy to see you show up.
430
00:16:57,066 --> 00:16:59,277
And even happier to see me crawl out.
431
00:16:59,650 --> 00:17:02,362
If I were to write a new list,
432
00:17:02,363 --> 00:17:04,740
number one would be,
"I wish Jim would have
433
00:17:04,741 --> 00:17:08,076
the same confidence he had
when he first asked me out."
434
00:17:08,077 --> 00:17:10,412
I was young and dumb
and had nothing to lose.
435
00:17:10,413 --> 00:17:13,003
And now you're old and dumb
and have nothing to lose.
436
00:17:14,417 --> 00:17:15,959
Food for thought.
437
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,878
Enjoy your fight.
438
00:17:17,879 --> 00:17:18,963
I will.
439
00:17:22,414 --> 00:17:23,761
[BRIGHT ROCK MUSIC]
440
00:17:25,417 --> 00:17:26,710
[ELEVATOR CHIMES]
441
00:17:28,749 --> 00:17:31,042
Trey, there's...
442
00:17:31,043 --> 00:17:32,794
there's something I need to say.
443
00:17:32,795 --> 00:17:34,796
- Out loud.
- Sure. Sure.
444
00:17:34,797 --> 00:17:36,133
I'm going to say it now.
445
00:17:36,144 --> 00:17:37,966
Go. Lay it on me.
446
00:17:37,967 --> 00:17:40,009
Um, you know how I'm pretty good
447
00:17:40,010 --> 00:17:41,803
at managing other people's conflicts?
448
00:17:41,804 --> 00:17:43,346
Babe, you're better than pretty good.
449
00:17:43,347 --> 00:17:44,389
You're ferocious.
450
00:17:44,390 --> 00:17:45,807
Sure, I'm ferocious in my head,
451
00:17:45,808 --> 00:17:46,975
where I fight with other people
452
00:17:46,976 --> 00:17:48,560
instead of directly talking to them.
453
00:17:48,561 --> 00:17:50,728
What the hell did Jim do now?
454
00:17:50,729 --> 00:17:54,275
No, no, no. It's... it's about you.
455
00:17:55,497 --> 00:17:56,809
What is it?
456
00:17:56,810 --> 00:17:59,112
You were showing off in yoga.
457
00:17:59,113 --> 00:18:01,322
And... and I didn't know how to react.
458
00:18:01,323 --> 00:18:03,992
And then she got all touchy with you
459
00:18:03,993 --> 00:18:06,911
and called you her warrior
and talked about your sword.
460
00:18:06,912 --> 00:18:08,371
And then you were kissing the earth.
461
00:18:08,372 --> 00:18:10,623
And it was embarrassing, and
I didn't know how to react.
462
00:18:10,624 --> 00:18:12,333
And then I got really jealous,
and I have not been jealous
463
00:18:12,334 --> 00:18:13,835
since I was 16 years old,
and it was really, really bad.
464
00:18:13,836 --> 00:18:14,836
I do not wanna be jealous again.
465
00:18:14,837 --> 00:18:15,879
I got really, really jealous
466
00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:17,297
about a boy named Craig Heisner.
467
00:18:17,298 --> 00:18:18,673
And it's really embarrassing
that all of these words
468
00:18:18,674 --> 00:18:21,218
are just blurting out of
my mouth, so there you go.
469
00:18:25,162 --> 00:18:27,038
I was showing off.
470
00:18:27,975 --> 00:18:30,977
I was showing off for you.
471
00:18:30,978 --> 00:18:33,021
Why were you showing off for me?
472
00:18:33,022 --> 00:18:35,273
I... you don't need to. I adore you.
473
00:18:35,274 --> 00:18:37,942
I couldn't be any more impressed by you.
474
00:18:37,943 --> 00:18:40,111
Yeah, and I wanna keep it that way.
475
00:18:40,112 --> 00:18:42,697
I wanna be enthusiastic
about new challenges.
476
00:18:42,698 --> 00:18:45,366
I wanna volunteer more.
477
00:18:45,367 --> 00:18:48,204
I wanna express my
affection for you poetically.
478
00:18:51,957 --> 00:18:53,833
You took my wish list out of the trash.
479
00:18:53,834 --> 00:18:56,419
[LAUGHS]
480
00:18:56,420 --> 00:18:58,421
I did.
481
00:18:58,422 --> 00:19:01,716
But your wishes don't
belong in the trash.
482
00:19:01,717 --> 00:19:04,260
That's really romantic.
483
00:19:04,261 --> 00:19:05,386
Here comes a hug.
484
00:19:05,387 --> 00:19:07,388
No, stop, stop! No. No.
485
00:19:07,389 --> 00:19:08,516
What?
486
00:19:09,892 --> 00:19:11,351
Hot yoga hurts.
487
00:19:11,352 --> 00:19:14,687
[LAUGHS] Oh, my God.
488
00:19:14,688 --> 00:19:17,315
- [GROANS]
- Baby. Aw.
489
00:19:17,316 --> 00:19:20,735
? ?
490
00:19:20,736 --> 00:19:22,654
Hey, Kristen.
491
00:19:22,655 --> 00:19:23,863
Jim.
492
00:19:23,864 --> 00:19:25,573
You know, great class yesterday.
493
00:19:25,574 --> 00:19:27,325
Uh, hard class.
494
00:19:27,326 --> 00:19:29,244
Hard... hot, uh...
495
00:19:29,245 --> 00:19:31,579
hard, hot class.
496
00:19:31,580 --> 00:19:36,501
I just... I wanted to apologize
for exaggerating, uh...
497
00:19:36,502 --> 00:19:39,629
actually, inventing my yoga credentials.
498
00:19:39,630 --> 00:19:41,756
Um, I'm a divorced dad.
499
00:19:41,757 --> 00:19:43,174
I'm dipping my toe back into dating.
500
00:19:43,175 --> 00:19:45,593
- And I just, uh...
- Divorce is brutal.
501
00:19:45,594 --> 00:19:46,970
Yes. But luckily,
502
00:19:46,971 --> 00:19:48,471
my ex and I are on great terms.
503
00:19:48,472 --> 00:19:50,598
She actually came with me to the class
504
00:19:50,599 --> 00:19:52,517
with her fianc�, Trey...
505
00:19:52,518 --> 00:19:55,061
his sword was very straight.
506
00:19:55,062 --> 00:19:56,479
You mean the show-off?
507
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:59,774
I'm so glad you noticed.
508
00:19:59,775 --> 00:20:02,193
My ex and I kept the family apartment,
509
00:20:02,194 --> 00:20:03,486
and we alternate weeks so that
510
00:20:03,487 --> 00:20:05,029
the kids don't have to move around.
511
00:20:05,030 --> 00:20:07,240
Oh. I grew up with divorced parents
512
00:20:07,241 --> 00:20:09,117
and always hated
bouncing back and forth.
513
00:20:09,118 --> 00:20:10,535
It's good you're
putting your kids first.
514
00:20:10,536 --> 00:20:13,955
Very unselfish. That's
some life yoga there.
515
00:20:13,956 --> 00:20:15,457
Sat nam.
516
00:20:15,458 --> 00:20:16,584
Sat nam!
517
00:20:20,421 --> 00:20:22,297
Um...
518
00:20:22,298 --> 00:20:24,799
hey, uh, you think
maybe we could get a...
519
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:27,010
a cup of something... not coffee.
520
00:20:27,011 --> 00:20:29,345
Maybe a tea or smoothie?
521
00:20:29,346 --> 00:20:30,388
Boba?
522
00:20:30,389 --> 00:20:33,224
Well, I'd kill for a cup of coffee.
523
00:20:33,225 --> 00:20:34,934
You said you don't drink coffee.
524
00:20:34,935 --> 00:20:36,269
I lied.
525
00:20:36,270 --> 00:20:38,313
Oh, great. We have something in common.
526
00:20:38,314 --> 00:20:39,397
[LAUGHS]
527
00:20:39,398 --> 00:20:42,400
? ?
528
00:20:42,401 --> 00:20:47,530
And exhaling as you squeeze
your legs into your chest.
529
00:20:47,531 --> 00:20:49,824
This pose is called pavanamuktasana,
530
00:20:49,825 --> 00:20:52,702
or wind-relieving pose.
531
00:20:52,703 --> 00:20:55,789
And just to relieve anyone
of any embarrassment,
532
00:20:55,790 --> 00:20:58,833
I wanna say that if you find
some wind being released,
533
00:20:58,834 --> 00:21:01,294
then you're doing it right.
534
00:21:01,295 --> 00:21:03,964
Wait, we're supposed to fart?
535
00:21:06,050 --> 00:21:09,302
Well, don't go out of your way, but...
536
00:21:09,303 --> 00:21:10,386
Yoga.
537
00:21:10,387 --> 00:21:12,514
Where have you been my whole life?
538
00:21:12,515 --> 00:21:17,353
? ?
539
00:21:17,403 --> 00:21:21,953
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