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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,131 --> 00:00:03,438 [electronic music playing] 2 00:00:24,067 --> 00:00:25,808 [Emile] Are we ready? 3 00:00:25,895 --> 00:00:27,549 It'’s showtime. 4 00:00:27,636 --> 00:00:28,767 [electricity crackling] 5 00:00:28,854 --> 00:00:30,552 [school bell rings] 6 00:00:30,639 --> 00:00:33,120 Sometimes, I wish we got to pick. 7 00:00:33,207 --> 00:00:35,513 Okay. Bait taken. What would you pick? 8 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:36,993 Something I'’m good at. 9 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:38,908 Like Dramatic Monologue World, 10 00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,562 or Shrimp-Eating World. 11 00:00:40,649 --> 00:00:42,520 Yeah, I would not argue with Shrimp-Eating World. 12 00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:46,829 Or a world based on what is objectively 13 00:00:46,916 --> 00:00:50,006 the greatest-written TV show of all time... 14 00:00:50,093 --> 00:00:52,052 Glimmerdale. 15 00:00:52,139 --> 00:00:54,271 The high school drama series with so many plot twists 16 00:00:54,358 --> 00:00:56,839 it feels like the writing staff stopped drinking water. 17 00:00:56,926 --> 00:00:58,362 Other than you, it'’s the love of my life. 18 00:00:58,449 --> 00:00:59,929 - Well, thank you. - What would you pick? 19 00:01:00,016 --> 00:01:01,844 Mm, I don'’t know. 20 00:01:01,931 --> 00:01:04,455 Maybe, like, some kind of dark anime world. 21 00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:06,892 Ooh, or something with mech suits. 22 00:01:06,979 --> 00:01:08,546 Yeah. Or, what about this? 23 00:01:08,633 --> 00:01:10,548 It'’s like, it'’s like a hard sci-fi world 24 00:01:10,635 --> 00:01:12,333 where we finally learn that our entire existence 25 00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:14,117 is actually just like, 26 00:01:14,204 --> 00:01:16,859 a simulated reality created by some post-human society, 27 00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:19,079 like centuries into the future. 28 00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:24,388 But I would settle for anime mech suits. 29 00:01:24,475 --> 00:01:26,956 - Cool. And specific. - Thank you. 30 00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:28,262 [school bell rings] 31 00:01:29,437 --> 00:01:31,874 [cheerleader] Whoo! 32 00:01:31,961 --> 00:01:34,616 [hip-hop music playing] 33 00:01:34,703 --> 00:01:36,270 - [can hisses open] - [all laugh] 34 00:01:41,884 --> 00:01:43,929 [all cheering] 35 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,410 [no audio] 36 00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:48,151 Letterman jackets. 37 00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:51,154 Cheerleader'’s cheerleading for no reason. 38 00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:54,853 Hot background students visibly in their mid 20'’s. 39 00:01:54,940 --> 00:01:56,986 My bish got her wish. 40 00:01:57,073 --> 00:01:59,075 We'’re in Glimmerdale! 41 00:01:59,162 --> 00:02:01,817 ♪ One, two, three, four, five When I wake up ♪ 42 00:02:01,904 --> 00:02:05,647 ♪ Something burning deep inside Can we make it now? ♪ 43 00:02:06,909 --> 00:02:08,040 ♪ Can we make it now? ♪ 44 00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:09,955 - Abbott. - Hey, girl. 45 00:02:10,042 --> 00:02:11,218 Hi. 46 00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:12,654 Oh, my God! 47 00:02:12,741 --> 00:02:14,308 All the blood is rushing to my butt! 48 00:02:14,395 --> 00:02:16,701 Okay, mazels on that, but is this at all weird to you 49 00:02:16,788 --> 00:02:18,442 that you got exactly what you were hoping for 50 00:02:18,529 --> 00:02:19,878 after one random conversation about it? 51 00:02:19,965 --> 00:02:21,663 I can'’t think about that, okay? 52 00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:23,534 This is the greatest thing that'’s ever happened! 53 00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:26,885 Okay, first we'’re gonna go to the girls'’ locker room 54 00:02:26,972 --> 00:02:29,236 because the cheerleaders are probably having a séance. 55 00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:31,107 And then we can go into the boys'’ locker room 56 00:02:31,194 --> 00:02:33,240 and we dramatically split up a Pingle-Pongle ring, 57 00:02:33,327 --> 00:02:36,243 or whatever designer drug that they'’ve invented this season. 58 00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:38,636 And then I'’m gonna kiss someone with tongue, 59 00:02:38,723 --> 00:02:40,290 - and it'’s gonna be-- - Breathe. Please. 60 00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:41,987 - Okay? Okay? Yes. - I'’m seeing stars. 61 00:02:42,074 --> 00:02:43,337 No, I understand. Very exciting. 62 00:02:43,424 --> 00:02:44,860 But I just want you to think about 63 00:02:44,947 --> 00:02:46,296 that we'’ve been to some worlds 64 00:02:46,383 --> 00:02:48,124 that seemed like they were gonna be really great, 65 00:02:48,211 --> 00:02:49,952 - and then turned out to be-- - Yes, you'’re right. 66 00:02:50,039 --> 00:02:51,649 D.J. World. A mega mix nightmare. 67 00:02:51,736 --> 00:02:53,173 - Yes. - Totally. Completely. 68 00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:55,392 Okay, we'’re gonna go find Schneider, 69 00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:58,178 and we'’re gonna confirm that my dreams are coming true, 70 00:02:58,265 --> 00:03:01,137 and then we'’re gonna strap in. 71 00:03:01,224 --> 00:03:02,791 - Attagirl. - Did you see Abbott? 72 00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:04,923 - Yes, I saw Abbott. - I'’m gonna pass out. 73 00:03:05,010 --> 00:03:07,187 ♪ This is what We came here for ♪ 74 00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:09,928 ♪ I'’m coming out '’cause The girls and boys want more ♪ 75 00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:12,540 [crackling] 76 00:03:15,717 --> 00:03:17,371 Hey, Schneider. 77 00:03:17,458 --> 00:03:18,850 It'’s us. 78 00:03:18,937 --> 00:03:21,157 Okay, so what'’s the deal with this world, 79 00:03:21,244 --> 00:03:23,290 and why are you actually prepping for class 80 00:03:23,377 --> 00:03:25,292 and not freaking out and working on the portal? 81 00:03:25,379 --> 00:03:27,250 Thanks for your questions. Please have a seat. 82 00:03:27,337 --> 00:03:28,730 Just triple-checking here. 83 00:03:28,817 --> 00:03:31,298 We are in Glimmerdale world, right? 84 00:03:31,385 --> 00:03:32,951 Correct. Please have a seat. 85 00:03:33,038 --> 00:03:35,998 Yes! I knew it! 86 00:03:36,085 --> 00:03:38,348 [Jonesie] No issues blending in here, I guess. 87 00:03:38,435 --> 00:03:39,958 I cannot believe how chill this Schneider is 88 00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:41,917 about us being here. 89 00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,267 Yeah, well, I think he'’s just doing it for the other kids. 90 00:03:44,354 --> 00:03:46,313 Plus, we'’re not gonna cause an anomaly in this world. 91 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:50,621 You are talking to the Glimmerdale fan club president 92 00:03:50,708 --> 00:03:52,797 not really, actually, but maybe that'’s... 93 00:03:52,884 --> 00:03:55,322 I would love to see your business card. 94 00:03:55,409 --> 00:03:56,888 Okay, let'’s get started on chapter three, 95 00:03:56,975 --> 00:04:00,240 a review of the anatomy of the seahorse. 96 00:04:00,327 --> 00:04:03,112 Number one, the pectoral fin. 97 00:04:03,199 --> 00:04:04,983 Okay, so we got to find out what our storyline is, 98 00:04:05,070 --> 00:04:06,768 and then we blend in. 99 00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,335 Easy peasy. 100 00:04:08,422 --> 00:04:10,772 What up, girls? The Schroödinger High Clawmen 101 00:04:10,859 --> 00:04:13,122 keep getting crushed by the Sludge High Seahorses. 102 00:04:13,209 --> 00:04:14,384 So you two better have ideas 103 00:04:14,471 --> 00:04:15,994 on how to prank them into the ground. 104 00:04:16,081 --> 00:04:19,476 Okay, that was, um, oddly phrased. 105 00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:22,610 Area two, the snout and eye zone of the seahorse. 106 00:04:22,697 --> 00:04:24,002 Figured you'’d be prime for the job 107 00:04:24,089 --> 00:04:25,439 ever since you pranked the principal 108 00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:27,615 into revealing she was a ghost last year. 109 00:04:27,702 --> 00:04:29,791 - So good. - Right. That storyline. 110 00:04:29,878 --> 00:04:32,881 I mean, very real event that happened. 111 00:04:32,968 --> 00:04:35,275 Thank you. We will get right on that. 112 00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:37,712 A prank episode? 113 00:04:37,799 --> 00:04:39,583 Gosh, I was kind of hoping for something 114 00:04:39,670 --> 00:04:41,716 like sexy supernatural storyline. 115 00:04:41,803 --> 00:04:44,196 Are prank storylines even a thing? 116 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:47,025 Of course, the eye is the most vulnerable part of the seahorse. 117 00:04:47,112 --> 00:04:48,723 But watch out for the eye spine. 118 00:04:48,810 --> 00:04:50,028 [Abbott] Psst! 119 00:04:50,115 --> 00:04:51,595 [Mr. Schneider] Area three, 120 00:04:51,682 --> 00:04:54,772 the keel, or soft underbelly of the seahorse, 121 00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:57,732 can be penetrated by a blade or sharp object... 122 00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:02,214 [mouthing] 123 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:07,655 Yup. 124 00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,396 Things are looking up. 125 00:05:09,483 --> 00:05:11,876 And by things, I mean my... 126 00:05:13,965 --> 00:05:15,271 And by thing-- 127 00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:17,055 I thought you were gonna interrupt me? 128 00:05:17,142 --> 00:05:19,231 No, I wanted to hear where the double entendre was going. 129 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,451 Oh, it wasn'’t gonna be good. It was gonna be kind of gross. 130 00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:22,713 - Oh. - Yeah. 131 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,193 [school bell rings] 132 00:05:25,977 --> 00:05:27,196 Wait. 133 00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:29,111 We have to talk to Schneider. 134 00:05:29,198 --> 00:05:30,721 Right. 135 00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:32,810 - What was I thinking? - Um, something gross? 136 00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:35,073 - Yeah, it was really gross. - Yeah, mm-hmm. 137 00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:40,905 [Jonesie] Where'’d he go? 138 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,865 How did he leave so fast? 139 00:05:43,952 --> 00:05:45,997 He'’s probably just on his way to faculty fight club, 140 00:05:46,084 --> 00:05:49,479 or having an affair with a mob boss mom or something. 141 00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:51,873 Instead of working on the portal? 142 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,962 Yeah. I mean, we all have to play our parts 143 00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:55,616 in order to blend in. 144 00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:57,269 Like, right now, 145 00:05:57,357 --> 00:06:00,751 Abbott wants to confess to me some deep, dark secret. 146 00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:04,146 [hissing] 147 00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:05,974 Oh, yeah. 148 00:06:06,061 --> 00:06:09,673 He is a tortured loose-rules vampire, for sure. 149 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:10,935 Okay. 150 00:06:11,022 --> 00:06:12,372 Gotta go deal with this. 151 00:06:12,459 --> 00:06:14,678 Wouldn'’t want to cause an anomaly, hey? 152 00:06:14,765 --> 00:06:17,289 Okay. See you. 153 00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:19,727 Hey, could you just hold up? 154 00:06:19,814 --> 00:06:21,729 If you'’re gonna do that, then what am I supposed to do? 155 00:06:21,816 --> 00:06:23,731 Great Q. 156 00:06:23,818 --> 00:06:26,473 There is that prank thing that Sierra and Emile-- 157 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,344 [dramatic music playing] 158 00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:30,738 Davey, who'’s that? 159 00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:32,479 Oh! 160 00:06:32,566 --> 00:06:36,004 And that right there is your storyline 161 00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:37,527 straight out of season one. 162 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,878 A serial killer plaguing the town 163 00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:45,579 until one teen journalist brings him to justice. 164 00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:47,798 So I'’m supposed to take down a serial killer 165 00:06:47,885 --> 00:06:49,452 while you make out with the hot-maybe-vampire 166 00:06:49,539 --> 00:06:51,193 in the stairwell? 167 00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:53,282 You can'’t argue with the logic 168 00:06:53,369 --> 00:06:55,110 of a show with no logic. 169 00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:57,504 Okay, good luck, kiddo. 170 00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:58,940 You'’ll be great. 171 00:06:59,027 --> 00:07:00,550 Oh, Abbott? 172 00:07:00,637 --> 00:07:02,334 I want to suck your face! 173 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:04,249 [Principal Neighbors, over PA] Attention, students. 174 00:07:04,336 --> 00:07:05,468 Principal Neighbors here. 175 00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:07,296 If anyone has any ideas 176 00:07:07,383 --> 00:07:08,993 of how to really prank the Sludge High Seahorses 177 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,430 at the big game, 178 00:07:10,517 --> 00:07:11,735 please come see me in my office. 179 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,088 [dramatic music playing] 180 00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:22,354 ♪ Take me under ♪ 181 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:24,531 [sighs] 182 00:07:26,794 --> 00:07:28,839 ♪ Love me until I'’m ♪ 183 00:07:30,580 --> 00:07:32,060 ♪ Finished ♪ 184 00:07:40,242 --> 00:07:41,852 Oh, Davey. 185 00:07:43,114 --> 00:07:44,638 I didn'’t see you there. 186 00:07:44,725 --> 00:07:46,204 I'’ve got a problem 187 00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:48,598 that only you can help me with. 188 00:07:48,685 --> 00:07:50,470 Okay. Yeah. 189 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:53,995 Let me guess. 190 00:07:54,082 --> 00:07:57,520 You'’re one way by day, and by night another. 191 00:07:57,607 --> 00:08:01,219 Constantly at war with your one true nature. 192 00:08:01,306 --> 00:08:04,571 Always trying to hide the beast within. 193 00:08:04,658 --> 00:08:06,921 Abbott, you don'’t have to hide anymore. 194 00:08:07,008 --> 00:08:10,794 I know that you'’re... 195 00:08:14,145 --> 00:08:15,320 a vampire. 196 00:08:15,407 --> 00:08:16,626 Yes! 197 00:08:16,713 --> 00:08:18,193 I thought you were gonna say it with me. 198 00:08:20,064 --> 00:08:22,110 - You figured it out. - [shushes] 199 00:08:24,721 --> 00:08:26,201 Your secret'’s safe with me, okay? 200 00:08:27,681 --> 00:08:29,334 You can be yourself with me. 201 00:08:29,421 --> 00:08:31,772 [seductive music playing] 202 00:08:36,341 --> 00:08:41,477 Just a lone teen looking for an on-campus serial killer. 203 00:08:41,564 --> 00:08:44,436 Because that'’s whose responsibility that should be. 204 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:48,092 Hey. Hey. 205 00:08:48,179 --> 00:08:49,833 Hey! 206 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:51,226 Hey, stop! 207 00:08:51,313 --> 00:08:54,359 Stop in the name of teen journalism! 208 00:08:54,446 --> 00:08:56,666 God, this show is so dumb. 209 00:09:06,633 --> 00:09:11,072 Okay, Glimmerdale'’s usually more funny dumb, not creepy dumb. 210 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,212 [all slurp] 211 00:09:27,436 --> 00:09:28,829 And that'’s a no from me. 212 00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:33,877 It'’s just so hard. 213 00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:36,053 - Being a vampire. - [sighs] I know. 214 00:09:36,140 --> 00:09:39,230 Especially with this big game coming up. 215 00:09:39,317 --> 00:09:41,189 Right. Right. 216 00:09:41,276 --> 00:09:46,498 Hey, wouldn'’t you rather talk about how only my love 217 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:49,414 can save you from your incurable bloodthirst? 218 00:09:49,501 --> 00:09:51,765 Shh! 219 00:09:51,852 --> 00:09:53,505 There'’ll be plenty of time for that. 220 00:09:55,029 --> 00:09:56,596 But first... 221 00:09:59,163 --> 00:10:01,383 [whispers] ...any prank ideas? 222 00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:03,167 Hmm? 223 00:10:03,254 --> 00:10:05,300 Please, Davey, 224 00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:07,563 you'’re the only one who can save me 225 00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:10,958 from the Sludge High Seahorses. 226 00:10:11,045 --> 00:10:13,395 Abbott. 227 00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:16,311 Abbott, Abbott, Abbott. [laughs] 228 00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:19,793 You are one tough nut to crack. 229 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:23,927 But it'’s a good thing that I'’m the right nutcracker 230 00:10:24,014 --> 00:10:27,365 to crack that... 231 00:10:27,452 --> 00:10:28,932 [Jonesie] Dude, we have to talk. 232 00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:31,587 Hi, Abbott. 233 00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:33,545 Sup? 234 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:36,287 [Davey] Okay, so, uh, updates? 235 00:10:36,374 --> 00:10:40,640 Abbott is a vampire, and we nearly bonked lips twice. 236 00:10:40,727 --> 00:10:42,685 That'’s great, but I'’m just not too sure 237 00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:44,252 that this is Glimmerdale. 238 00:10:44,339 --> 00:10:46,036 How could it not be? 239 00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:47,342 Everything that'’s happened 240 00:10:47,429 --> 00:10:49,213 is out of a classic episode. 241 00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:51,128 [Principal Neighbors] Remember, students, 242 00:10:51,215 --> 00:10:53,000 the only way to defeat the Sludge High Seahorses 243 00:10:53,087 --> 00:10:55,263 is with some of your best tactical prank ideas. 244 00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:57,918 Get those into me, the principal, ASAP. 245 00:10:58,005 --> 00:10:59,963 Do you-- Do you see? Like-Like-Like that. 246 00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:02,531 I don'’t remember Glimmerdale putting this much emphasis 247 00:11:02,618 --> 00:11:04,054 on seahorses. 248 00:11:04,141 --> 00:11:06,361 And you know what? I'’m very confused, 249 00:11:06,448 --> 00:11:07,623 because I don'’t even understand. 250 00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:09,320 What do they want us to do? 251 00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:11,540 They want us to prank them or beat them at football? 252 00:11:11,627 --> 00:11:14,108 - Davey, it'’s very unclear. - Well, you'’re picking at plots. 253 00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:15,500 You'’ve got a smart person brain. 254 00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:17,502 But Glimmerdale needs you dumb, baby. 255 00:11:17,589 --> 00:11:19,113 Okay? 256 00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:21,550 It'’s a show where all the plots are holes. 257 00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:23,552 Yes, that is... that is true. 258 00:11:23,639 --> 00:11:26,468 But nothing seems fishy to you? 259 00:11:26,555 --> 00:11:28,078 As in a disproportionate amount 260 00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:30,211 of literally fish-related content? 261 00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,431 The pectoral fin of the seahorse... 262 00:11:33,518 --> 00:11:35,956 [Davey] That'’s not even that weird for the show. 263 00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:37,566 It'’s a bravely sexy mess 264 00:11:37,653 --> 00:11:39,873 with selective logic and sloppy world-building, 265 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,178 and that'’s why it deserves an Emmy. 266 00:11:41,265 --> 00:11:42,745 Okay, Davey I say this with love, 267 00:11:42,832 --> 00:11:44,529 but is it possible that you are pulling a Davey 268 00:11:44,616 --> 00:11:46,793 and refusing to see anything other than what you want to see? 269 00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:48,533 Move. 270 00:11:48,620 --> 00:11:50,666 Moi? Pulling a Davey? 271 00:11:50,753 --> 00:11:52,450 - [whistle blows] - When have I ever done that? 272 00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:54,626 When you insisted your parents were throwing you a party 273 00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,454 when it was not your birthday, 274 00:11:56,541 --> 00:11:58,543 and they were very clearly taking you to the orthodontist 275 00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:01,068 - to get your retainer tightened? - Well, that'’s not my fault. 276 00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:03,113 - They got me a party hat. - You gave you a party hat. 277 00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:07,161 Okay, well, Schneider says that it'’s Glimmerdale so... boom. 278 00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:08,945 Okay, where is he, 279 00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,947 and why hasn'’t he come to find us about the portal? 280 00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:12,209 Come on, Clawmen, don'’t quit now! 281 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:14,559 Defeat Sludge High and tell us how! 282 00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:15,822 Just... 283 00:12:15,909 --> 00:12:17,258 No, do that over here. 284 00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:18,563 Please. 285 00:12:18,650 --> 00:12:19,869 Okay, I think you'’re wrong. 286 00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:21,131 Jonesie! Talking in the hallway. 287 00:12:21,218 --> 00:12:22,480 That'’s an automatic detention! 288 00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:23,743 What, since when? 289 00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:24,831 - Davey! - Principal Neighbors! 290 00:12:26,702 --> 00:12:28,748 Davey, help! 291 00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:31,141 - Where are you going, Davey? - With Jonesie. 292 00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:34,188 No! You have to come with me. 293 00:12:34,275 --> 00:12:36,756 [sighs] Why? 294 00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:37,974 Not here. I'’ll tell you about it 295 00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:39,236 in the secret speakeasy malt shop 296 00:12:39,323 --> 00:12:40,455 hidden in the basement. 297 00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:41,978 [sighs] 298 00:12:42,065 --> 00:12:44,502 Soda Pete'’s Basement Malt House. 299 00:12:44,589 --> 00:12:46,635 But I really should... 300 00:12:46,722 --> 00:12:49,856 The password to get in is just a saucy dance. 301 00:12:51,596 --> 00:12:52,989 That is so dumb. 302 00:12:54,512 --> 00:12:55,818 [girl giggling] 303 00:12:58,603 --> 00:13:00,257 [electric crackling] 304 00:13:11,529 --> 00:13:13,705 [snaps fingers] 305 00:13:15,446 --> 00:13:16,796 Oh, Schneider! 306 00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:18,493 Thank God that detention is with you. 307 00:13:18,580 --> 00:13:21,322 So, like, is this actually a Glimmerdale world or--? 308 00:13:21,409 --> 00:13:23,193 Thank you for your question. Please have a seat. 309 00:13:24,281 --> 00:13:25,674 Well... 310 00:13:27,371 --> 00:13:29,069 You'’re not gonna cause an anomaly. 311 00:13:29,156 --> 00:13:30,331 There'’s nobody else in here. 312 00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:31,549 Thank you for your question. 313 00:13:31,636 --> 00:13:32,768 Please have a seat. 314 00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:37,381 [intense music playing] 315 00:13:40,776 --> 00:13:42,299 What the hell was that? 316 00:13:42,386 --> 00:13:43,910 Okay, I don'’t know what is going on, 317 00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:45,650 but I'’m starting to think that-- 318 00:13:45,737 --> 00:13:47,261 Thank you for your question. 319 00:13:47,348 --> 00:13:48,828 Please write 100 lines 320 00:13:48,915 --> 00:13:50,568 about how to defeat the Sludge High Seahorses. 321 00:13:50,655 --> 00:13:52,701 - Goodbye. - No... 322 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:55,225 No, no, no, no! 323 00:13:55,312 --> 00:13:57,053 - [keys jiggle, lock clicks] - Come on! 324 00:13:57,140 --> 00:13:59,273 Hey! Hey! 325 00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:00,883 [gasps] 326 00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:09,196 TGI vents. 327 00:14:10,066 --> 00:14:11,807 ♪ What you see? ♪ 328 00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:14,070 ♪ Don'’t you ever Take your eyes off me ♪ 329 00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:15,898 ♪ Tell me what you see ♪ 330 00:14:15,985 --> 00:14:18,248 ♪ Don'’t you ever Take your eyes off me ♪ 331 00:14:19,423 --> 00:14:21,164 [song plays on jukebox] 332 00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:25,212 [Davey] This place is awesome. 333 00:14:25,299 --> 00:14:27,344 The '’50s jukebox. 334 00:14:27,431 --> 00:14:30,870 The unspoken implication that teens and an adult biker gang 335 00:14:30,957 --> 00:14:32,654 should all hang out together in the same place. 336 00:14:32,741 --> 00:14:35,352 Whoa, guys, this has been awesome, 337 00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:37,528 but I really should be getting going. 338 00:14:37,615 --> 00:14:39,574 - Ow! - You can'’t leave. 339 00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:44,318 Not until you'’ve helped us with our problem. 340 00:14:44,405 --> 00:14:45,536 [giggles] 341 00:14:46,668 --> 00:14:48,061 Okay, let me guess. 342 00:14:48,148 --> 00:14:50,237 Um, haunted board game. 343 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,369 Cheerleader coven. 344 00:14:52,456 --> 00:14:57,113 Evil nun cult that is brainwashing all the adults. 345 00:14:58,332 --> 00:14:59,942 Kind of. Uh... 346 00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:01,683 We want to know what you would do 347 00:15:01,770 --> 00:15:04,904 to help decimate the Sludge High Seahorses at the big game. 348 00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:06,731 This again? 349 00:15:06,818 --> 00:15:08,211 Why is it so important to defeat them? 350 00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:10,866 Because they'’re... 351 00:15:12,868 --> 00:15:15,088 - Working for my grandmother... - Controlled by the evil warden! 352 00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:16,611 - ...who is also a witch. - Teen zombies. 353 00:15:16,698 --> 00:15:20,049 That literally all checks out. 354 00:15:20,136 --> 00:15:21,659 Well, good thing you came to me. 355 00:15:21,746 --> 00:15:23,748 Okay, come close. 356 00:15:25,620 --> 00:15:27,143 Let'’s assume that the Seahorses 357 00:15:27,230 --> 00:15:29,929 are gonna use Abbott'’s vampire powers 358 00:15:30,016 --> 00:15:33,367 to open up a hell mouth under the field. 359 00:15:33,454 --> 00:15:35,630 Then, while half of us infiltrate the coven 360 00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:37,458 by pretending to be under its curse, 361 00:15:37,545 --> 00:15:39,329 the other half of us will find out 362 00:15:39,416 --> 00:15:41,897 which one of the teachers is actually secretly working 363 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,855 for the FBI. 364 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,728 So we'’ll get the impression that Emile has been eaten 365 00:15:46,815 --> 00:15:48,338 by the demon swim coach. 366 00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:50,862 But don'’t worry, he'’s with Interpol. 367 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,995 So then everyone will transfer their powers to me 368 00:15:53,082 --> 00:15:54,779 so then I can stop the football mafia 369 00:15:54,866 --> 00:15:57,217 before their neutron bomb destroys the school. 370 00:15:57,304 --> 00:15:58,653 [cackles] 371 00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:00,960 So? What do you think? 372 00:16:02,570 --> 00:16:04,050 Just tell us how to build a big laser! 373 00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:09,751 [all laugh] 374 00:16:09,838 --> 00:16:11,013 Good one, Davey. 375 00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:13,059 Maybe a burger and a malt 376 00:16:13,146 --> 00:16:15,322 will help you come up with better ideas. 377 00:16:21,023 --> 00:16:22,503 The pectoral fin of the seahorse. 378 00:16:22,590 --> 00:16:24,113 Yeah, that'’s gonna be a no from me. 379 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,985 [energetic music playing] 380 00:16:37,648 --> 00:16:38,998 [gasps] 381 00:16:39,085 --> 00:16:40,608 Vents? 382 00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,479 - Vents. - Come back, girl. 383 00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:44,090 We want to know your plan for the big game. 384 00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:46,266 We hate football! Leave us alone! 385 00:16:50,487 --> 00:16:51,706 Whoa, whoa! 386 00:17:02,891 --> 00:17:04,719 You don'’t belong here. 387 00:17:04,806 --> 00:17:06,068 [school bell rings] 388 00:17:06,155 --> 00:17:07,635 ...part of the seahorse, 389 00:17:07,722 --> 00:17:08,984 but watch out for the eye spine. 390 00:17:10,725 --> 00:17:12,683 Sometimes I wish we got to pick. 391 00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:15,512 ...some post-human society, like centuries into the future. 392 00:17:15,599 --> 00:17:17,688 Into the future. 393 00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:20,039 [Davey] Wait, isn'’t this where we started? 394 00:17:21,692 --> 00:17:23,259 - [can hissing open] - [all laugh] 395 00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:27,176 [excited shouting] 396 00:17:27,263 --> 00:17:29,265 Okay, what is going on? 397 00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:30,310 Hey! 398 00:17:31,702 --> 00:17:33,487 Seahorses rule! 399 00:17:34,662 --> 00:17:35,837 What are you...? 400 00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:40,755 [industrial music playing] 401 00:17:48,241 --> 00:17:50,069 [laughs] 402 00:17:50,156 --> 00:17:52,680 Hey! Hey! You know what? 403 00:17:52,767 --> 00:17:54,595 We are not actually from this world, okay? 404 00:17:54,682 --> 00:17:56,814 We'’re traveling through the multiverse trying to get home. 405 00:17:56,901 --> 00:17:59,034 We do not belong here. This isn'’t-- This isn'’t real. 406 00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:00,731 These aren'’t real. 407 00:18:00,818 --> 00:18:03,691 Okay, not to bust this weird roll you'’re on, 408 00:18:03,778 --> 00:18:06,041 but aren'’t you a little scared of Cheryl? 409 00:18:09,175 --> 00:18:11,612 No Cheryl, because I did not just cause an anomaly, 410 00:18:11,699 --> 00:18:14,789 because we are not actually in Glimmerdale world. 411 00:18:14,876 --> 00:18:16,965 We are in a simulation. 412 00:18:18,271 --> 00:18:19,402 Oh. 413 00:18:28,629 --> 00:18:30,370 - [rumbling] - [gasps] 414 00:18:33,199 --> 00:18:35,418 [gasps and screams] 415 00:18:38,378 --> 00:18:39,857 [chuckles] 416 00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:42,382 Davey and Jonesie. 417 00:18:42,469 --> 00:18:44,906 You figured out my master plan. 418 00:18:44,993 --> 00:18:46,386 What? 419 00:18:46,473 --> 00:18:47,865 Jonesie! 420 00:18:47,952 --> 00:18:50,433 You literally called this was a simulation! 421 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:52,392 Holy smokes, I am, like, 422 00:18:52,479 --> 00:18:54,524 out-of-this-world impressed right now. 423 00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:55,917 You'’re a freaking genius. 424 00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:57,353 No, I'’m not even gonna lie. 425 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:58,876 Like, this is probably the most ecstatic 426 00:18:58,963 --> 00:19:01,140 I'’ve ever been in my entire life! 427 00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:02,663 - [laughing] Whoa! - [Davey] Whoo! 428 00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:04,578 Um, excuse me! 429 00:19:04,665 --> 00:19:06,188 - [Jonesie] Sorry. - Yeah. Sorry. 430 00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:09,017 Yeah, there'’s just a lot going on here, you know? 431 00:19:09,104 --> 00:19:11,976 Uh, okay, who are you? We'’ll start there. 432 00:19:12,063 --> 00:19:14,370 I am the one you call... 433 00:19:14,457 --> 00:19:16,111 Emile. 434 00:19:16,198 --> 00:19:17,765 - Emile? - Emile? 435 00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:20,333 Call me Lobster Emile. 436 00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:21,725 [Davey] Lobster Emile? 437 00:19:21,812 --> 00:19:24,250 Make that General Lobster Emile! 438 00:19:24,337 --> 00:19:26,034 General Lobster Emile? 439 00:19:26,121 --> 00:19:27,992 Can you just tell us what'’s going on, please? 440 00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:32,606 Lobsters and seahorses 441 00:19:32,693 --> 00:19:35,522 have been locked in a bitter war for decades, where-- 442 00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:37,872 Wait! Weren'’t were we in Lobster World 443 00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:39,569 like 90 worlds ago? 444 00:19:39,656 --> 00:19:42,224 You don'’t belong here. 445 00:19:42,311 --> 00:19:44,966 - I'’m actually good with this. - Yeah. This rules. 446 00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:46,707 Yeah, but that was only for, like, a second 447 00:19:46,794 --> 00:19:48,752 because Lobster Schneider, he had his tech together, 448 00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:50,014 let me tell you that. 449 00:19:50,101 --> 00:19:51,233 Right, right, right. Okay. 450 00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:53,757 So now we'’re... back? 451 00:19:53,844 --> 00:19:55,585 Is that a thing? Can we do that? 452 00:19:55,672 --> 00:19:57,892 Oh, my God! Silence! 453 00:19:57,979 --> 00:20:00,024 Can I please continue? 454 00:20:00,111 --> 00:20:02,113 Yeah, sorry. 455 00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:03,680 For years, we have suffered 456 00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:07,075 at the hands of the cruel seahorses. 457 00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:10,905 With their superior technology and reproductive rate, 458 00:20:10,992 --> 00:20:14,125 we were hopelessly outnumbered and outgunned. 459 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:17,085 But then, one fateful day, 460 00:20:17,172 --> 00:20:19,305 I saw you infiltrate our universe 461 00:20:19,392 --> 00:20:21,829 using advanced portal technology. 462 00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:24,962 Such tactical prowess could only mean one thing. 463 00:20:25,049 --> 00:20:27,922 That you were from an advanced scientific dimension 464 00:20:28,009 --> 00:20:29,706 capable of designing weapons 465 00:20:29,793 --> 00:20:32,448 that would finally allow us to turn the tide of battle. 466 00:20:32,535 --> 00:20:35,712 I spent years trying to find a way to bring you back. 467 00:20:35,799 --> 00:20:37,236 Sorry, did you say, "years?" 468 00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,499 Lobsters lives much longer than humans, 469 00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:43,067 so time moves faster here. 470 00:20:43,154 --> 00:20:44,852 Does that make sense? 471 00:20:44,939 --> 00:20:46,157 No. 472 00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,072 Just go with it. Anyway... 473 00:20:48,159 --> 00:20:50,423 we built an interdimensional hook 474 00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:55,384 that could drag you back to our world through your portal. 475 00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:58,344 We knew you were unlikely to give up your technology 476 00:20:58,431 --> 00:21:00,128 without a fight. 477 00:21:00,215 --> 00:21:04,175 Our only option was to scan your brains by force. 478 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:07,178 But there was no trace of your portal schematics. 479 00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:10,399 Tactical stratagems. Weapons. Nothing. 480 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:14,273 It was almost like your minds were empty. 481 00:21:17,058 --> 00:21:18,755 Which could only mean one thing: 482 00:21:18,842 --> 00:21:20,627 that you had encrypted your brains 483 00:21:20,714 --> 00:21:21,932 to protect your classified memories 484 00:21:22,019 --> 00:21:24,021 against rudimentary mind-hacking. 485 00:21:24,108 --> 00:21:27,155 Leaving us with only one option: 486 00:21:27,242 --> 00:21:29,331 To design an advanced simulation 487 00:21:29,418 --> 00:21:31,855 to lull you into a false sense of security 488 00:21:31,942 --> 00:21:35,163 and trick you into revealing your secrets that way. 489 00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:37,034 We chose an environment so familiar 490 00:21:37,121 --> 00:21:39,994 that you'’d never think to question it: 491 00:21:40,081 --> 00:21:41,822 your old high school. 492 00:21:41,909 --> 00:21:44,477 Wait, so you scanned our brains 493 00:21:44,564 --> 00:21:46,435 and thought my memories of Glimmerdale 494 00:21:46,522 --> 00:21:48,655 were our actual high school? 495 00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:50,831 Your mind was full of them. 496 00:21:50,918 --> 00:21:52,615 By far the most prominent memories we could find. 497 00:21:52,702 --> 00:21:54,051 We just assumed... 498 00:21:54,138 --> 00:21:55,575 Oh my, God. 499 00:21:55,662 --> 00:21:57,054 I have wasted my youth. 500 00:21:57,141 --> 00:21:58,534 [Jonesie] Oh, big-time. 501 00:21:58,621 --> 00:22:00,057 Sorry, was that rude? 502 00:22:00,144 --> 00:22:01,755 No, no, no. 503 00:22:01,842 --> 00:22:03,844 My disappointment is only in myself. 504 00:22:03,931 --> 00:22:05,106 Okay. 505 00:22:05,193 --> 00:22:06,716 I see now that we were fools 506 00:22:06,803 --> 00:22:08,196 to try to outmaneuver you. 507 00:22:08,283 --> 00:22:09,893 But please, almighty ones, 508 00:22:09,980 --> 00:22:12,156 use your godlike scientific genius 509 00:22:12,243 --> 00:22:14,985 to help us destroy the seahorses for good. 510 00:22:15,072 --> 00:22:16,596 Uh, okay. Yeah. 511 00:22:16,683 --> 00:22:19,381 Um, sort of the thing we-- 512 00:22:19,468 --> 00:22:21,165 We can'’t help you. 513 00:22:21,252 --> 00:22:22,428 Wait, what? 514 00:22:22,515 --> 00:22:23,733 Uh, first off, 515 00:22:23,820 --> 00:22:25,605 you guys seem pretty evil yourselves. 516 00:22:25,692 --> 00:22:27,215 Yeah, this is a lot more annihilation talk 517 00:22:27,302 --> 00:22:28,477 than we usually side with. 518 00:22:28,564 --> 00:22:29,826 - Oh, uh, well-well-- - And second, 519 00:22:29,913 --> 00:22:31,785 you have just radically overestimated 520 00:22:31,872 --> 00:22:34,396 how much we know about science, which is nothing. 521 00:22:34,483 --> 00:22:36,398 - Nothing. Oh, my God! - [Jonesie] Nothing at all. 522 00:22:36,485 --> 00:22:37,660 But you predicted the probability 523 00:22:37,747 --> 00:22:39,923 of our simulation from the start. 524 00:22:40,010 --> 00:22:41,534 Yeah, I just watch a lot of sci-fi. 525 00:22:41,621 --> 00:22:44,145 I don'’t actually fi the sci myself. 526 00:22:44,232 --> 00:22:45,799 - You know what I'’m saying? - Are you serious? 527 00:22:45,886 --> 00:22:48,149 But you guys, you seem to be pretty good at it 528 00:22:48,236 --> 00:22:50,760 because you built an entire simulation 529 00:22:50,847 --> 00:22:53,894 and also an interdimensional hook? 530 00:22:53,981 --> 00:22:56,505 But then who built your portal!? 531 00:22:56,592 --> 00:22:58,594 I did. And they know nothing, sir. 532 00:22:58,681 --> 00:22:59,943 Just let them go. 533 00:23:00,030 --> 00:23:02,076 Schneider? You'’re involved in this? 534 00:23:02,163 --> 00:23:05,949 Oh, yeah, yeah, no, this is all making sense now. 535 00:23:06,036 --> 00:23:07,473 A-doy. I was hacking into the simulation 536 00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:08,735 to help you break free. 537 00:23:08,822 --> 00:23:09,953 You did what? 538 00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:11,781 Traitor! 539 00:23:11,868 --> 00:23:13,522 Oh! You were the one in the trench coat. 540 00:23:13,609 --> 00:23:15,611 Why were you in a disguise if you were trying to help? 541 00:23:15,698 --> 00:23:17,134 Yeah, you know, you really slowed down 542 00:23:17,221 --> 00:23:19,485 this whole convoluted simulation reveal thing. 543 00:23:19,572 --> 00:23:22,052 I didn'’t want to get in trouble with the authorities. 544 00:23:22,139 --> 00:23:23,706 - And there it is. - [Jonesie] Like Schneider. 545 00:23:23,793 --> 00:23:25,142 - [explosion, rumbling] - Whoa! 546 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:31,975 Enough! 547 00:23:32,062 --> 00:23:33,455 You'’re all in trouble, 548 00:23:33,542 --> 00:23:35,370 and this whole thing has been a huge waste 549 00:23:35,457 --> 00:23:36,632 of time and resources. 550 00:23:36,719 --> 00:23:38,329 At this point, 551 00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:40,070 I'’m just gonna cut my losses 552 00:23:40,157 --> 00:23:43,073 and eat you for sustenance. 553 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,510 I'’m sorry, what? 554 00:23:44,597 --> 00:23:45,641 I saw that coming. 555 00:23:48,470 --> 00:23:50,429 The tide has turned, [bleep]. 556 00:23:50,516 --> 00:23:51,908 They found us. 557 00:23:51,995 --> 00:23:53,910 No! No! 558 00:23:53,997 --> 00:23:56,696 No, you'’ll dry out my carapace! 559 00:23:56,783 --> 00:23:59,307 [Davey] Is that a seahorse with a leaf blower? 560 00:23:59,394 --> 00:24:02,092 - I love today. - Me too. 561 00:24:02,179 --> 00:24:03,920 Oh, for God sakes, let'’s just go. 562 00:24:05,139 --> 00:24:06,445 [thunder crashes] 563 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,884 So, uh, what are you gonna do 564 00:24:10,971 --> 00:24:13,103 now that you'’ve been branded as a traitor? 565 00:24:13,190 --> 00:24:15,715 Use your superior technology to unite the warring factions 566 00:24:15,802 --> 00:24:17,325 in a bid for peace? 567 00:24:17,412 --> 00:24:20,023 No. I only helped you get out of the simulation 568 00:24:20,110 --> 00:24:21,460 to get rid of you. 569 00:24:21,547 --> 00:24:23,418 I'’ve been desynced here for centuries. 570 00:24:23,505 --> 00:24:25,812 I have come to loathe the seahorses, 571 00:24:25,899 --> 00:24:29,032 especially after they murdered my family. 572 00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:30,991 So now I'’m building a weapon of mass destruction 573 00:24:31,078 --> 00:24:32,645 to kill them all. 574 00:24:32,732 --> 00:24:35,386 Wow. Backstory. Back, backstory city. 575 00:24:35,474 --> 00:24:40,174 Yeah. Okay. Hey, good luck with all that, or no good luck. 576 00:24:40,261 --> 00:24:41,436 I don'’t know. 577 00:24:41,523 --> 00:24:43,786 - Okay. Bye! - Bye! 578 00:24:43,873 --> 00:24:45,875 Yes, goodbye. Toodle-oo. All right. Take care. 579 00:24:45,962 --> 00:24:47,616 All right. 580 00:24:47,703 --> 00:24:50,924 Now to bathe in the blood of the seahorses. 581 00:24:51,011 --> 00:24:52,882 [crackling] 582 00:24:54,231 --> 00:24:55,711 My God! 583 00:24:55,798 --> 00:24:57,974 [ominous music playing] 584 00:25:02,109 --> 00:25:03,676 Stephen Simon Schneider? 585 00:25:05,329 --> 00:25:08,115 [gasps] How do you know my name? 586 00:25:08,202 --> 00:25:09,551 I'’m from the future. 587 00:25:09,638 --> 00:25:11,074 And you'’re about to make a grave mistake. 588 00:25:11,161 --> 00:25:12,467 Who are you? 589 00:25:12,554 --> 00:25:14,600 I'’m your son. 590 00:25:14,687 --> 00:25:16,515 [gasps] But how? 591 00:25:16,602 --> 00:25:18,386 Follow me if you want to live. 592 00:25:18,473 --> 00:25:20,606 [suspenseful music playing] 593 00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:45,152 [upbeat music playing] 594 00:25:45,202 --> 00:25:49,752 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 42921

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