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*BOB'S BURGERS*
Season 12 Episode 05
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00:00:08,356 --> 00:00:10,554
Episode Title: "Seve-tween Again"
Aired on: October 24, 2021.
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00:00:20,622 --> 00:00:22,474
So we got to find
pretend jobs
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00:00:22,559 --> 00:00:24,188
- for this Life Skills project?
- Yup.
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00:00:24,273 --> 00:00:26,686
- And a pretend apartment?
- Uh-huh.
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00:00:26,771 --> 00:00:29,209
- And make a pretend budget?
- Mm-hmm.
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Why is school always trying
to teach us stuff?
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I mean, when you and I grow up
and become famous robo-DJs...
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00:00:34,966 --> 00:00:36,139
Half-human, half-robot...
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00:00:36,224 --> 00:00:39,493
We can hire full robots to do
our life skills stuff for us.
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00:00:39,578 --> 00:00:41,504
We don't need
this type of training.
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I like this project.
Pretend budget money?
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00:00:44,115 --> 00:00:45,865
We can pretend-buy
whatever we want.
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Like toothpaste,
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but a kind with sugar in it.
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00:00:49,342 --> 00:00:51,158
Oh, is there
a sugary toothpaste?
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There is
if you add sugar to it.
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00:00:53,373 --> 00:00:55,233
Oh, there goes another one.
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00:00:55,318 --> 00:00:57,209
Look at the hair,
look at that bounce.
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00:00:57,294 --> 00:00:59,529
Ever since that hair salon
opened up next door,
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you think every woman walking by
just came from there.
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She did. I can tell.
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She's got that
"I just got my hair done
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00:01:05,278 --> 00:01:06,590
at a fancy salon" walk.
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00:01:06,675 --> 00:01:08,407
If you're so curious
about that place,
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00:01:08,492 --> 00:01:09,624
why don't you just go in?
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Get a trim or whatever.
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Their-their least
expensive trim.
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I can't.
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Gretchen's been doing my hair
for years,
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and I would never.
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- Okay.
- I don't even want her
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to know I'm looking,
which I'm not.
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00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:23,287
Gretchen knows
if you so much as got a trim
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00:01:23,372 --> 00:01:24,982
in the last year
from someone else.
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Haven't seen you
in a while, Georgia.
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- Your bangs look nice.
- Oh, thanks.
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- Who did this?!
- It was nothing, it was nothing.
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- It was a-a tiny trim. I was...
- Out! Out!
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- Get out of my chair!
- Aah!
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Okay, Linda. You're up.
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Besides, uh,
I like going to Gretchen's,
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even though sometimes
she smokes a cigarette
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right before she does my hair
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and it makes my hair smell
like cigarettes.
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And one time she cut my ear,
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but she pretended
it was already cut.
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She called it
my "bleeding ear problem."
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I mean, she's great!
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I-I'm-I'm perfectly happy.
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I-I don't think
she can hear you.
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You never know.
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Wha... What's the matter?
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- What's the matter, sweetie?
- Are you okay, Gene?
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Pube...!
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00:02:03,232 --> 00:02:05,265
- Huh.
- I think that's a chest hair,
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not technically a pube,
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00:02:06,419 --> 00:02:07,858
unless you have
a really long crotch.
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00:02:07,942 --> 00:02:09,123
Thanks a lot, Tina.
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00:02:09,208 --> 00:02:10,850
I bet I caught puberty
from you.
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I'm not ready
to be an adult!
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Before you know it, I'm gonna
be a pile of dust and bones
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holding onto
an electric saxophone probably!
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As if the Life Skills thing
at school wasn't enough,
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now my own sweet body
is telling me to grow up.
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00:02:23,045 --> 00:02:25,835
- Go away, pube.
- I don't want a 401!
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- Aw, Gene.
- It's not a pube.
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00:02:27,881 --> 00:02:30,038
You know, Gene,
besides the body hair
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and pimples and armpit odor
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and mood swings and neck sweat,
puberty's great.
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Why is Gene's pube gray?
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Even my puberty is growing up
too fast!
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00:02:38,514 --> 00:02:40,815
Hmm. That didn't put up
much of a fight.
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00:02:40,900 --> 00:02:42,759
- Aah!
- It's a match: old man gray.
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00:02:42,858 --> 00:02:46,069
Oh... Dad's chest hair must have
stuck on me this morning
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when I gave him
his surprise shower-hug.
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It's not really a surprise
when you do it every single day.
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Oh, thank God
I'm not pube-ing out.
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I'm still a beautiful baby boy.
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- Yes, you are.
- Yeah.
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Actually, you're a tween.
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Not a boy, not yet a woman.
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I'm not "tween" anything.
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00:03:02,450 --> 00:03:04,358
I'm securely
in the child column.
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Mother, I'm gonna need
extra chicken at dinner.
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This shook me to my core.
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00:03:08,429 --> 00:03:10,943
I thought I lost you, smoothie.
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So, I made
a pretend grocery list.
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00:03:13,115 --> 00:03:14,882
And I started looking
for our dream apartment:
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00:03:14,966 --> 00:03:17,109
two bedroom,
one bathroom and water slide.
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00:03:17,193 --> 00:03:19,101
We can meet at my house
every day after school
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this week
and build our dream lives.
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I can't believe
you're enjoying this.
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00:03:22,974 --> 00:03:25,101
- I'm freaking out!
- It's not so bad.
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You're not the one
who had the pube scare.
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00:03:26,990 --> 00:03:29,311
Our childhoods are zipping by,
and we're just expected
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00:03:29,396 --> 00:03:31,772
to wake up one day
and put on big-boy pants?
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00:03:31,857 --> 00:03:32,757
I hate pants!
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00:03:32,908 --> 00:03:34,918
We're getting graded
on this, so...
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- how's the fake job hunt going?
- Did you hear me, Alex?
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I had an almost-pube!
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I haven't had time to job-hunt.
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00:03:40,537 --> 00:03:42,936
You should check out the job
board at the community center.
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00:03:43,021 --> 00:03:45,038
That's where I found
my pretend telemarketing gig,
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which pays
nine big ones an hour,
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plus a small commission,
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whatever that means.
I assume it means gold.
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Uh. Fine.
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I'll go look at the job board,
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but I'm not gonna just settle
for anything.
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I need full benefits
and 12 weeks of vacation.
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I know what I'm worth.
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Well, time to grow up,
I guess.
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You two should head home.
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00:04:03,458 --> 00:04:05,216
Louise,
you still have your youth.
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00:04:05,301 --> 00:04:06,921
Get out there
and just be a kid.
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00:04:07,006 --> 00:04:09,054
And, Tina,
it's too late for you.
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But take care of Louise
as you trudge towards death.
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00:04:12,154 --> 00:04:13,232
- Okay.
- Okay?
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00:04:13,529 --> 00:04:15,455
Landscaping? Construction?
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00:04:15,540 --> 00:04:17,616
Those sound so outside-y.
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00:04:17,701 --> 00:04:20,686
Grocery store is hiring,
but they drug-test.
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00:04:20,771 --> 00:04:22,749
- Oh, hi, Gus.
- Looking for work, eh?
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00:04:22,834 --> 00:04:26,468
It's for a dumb school project
to prepare us for adulthood.
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00:04:26,553 --> 00:04:29,429
But I want to be,
like Sir Rod Stewart once said,
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- "Forever, forever young."
- I hear you.
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00:04:32,226 --> 00:04:34,761
The best way to stay young is
to do young things.
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00:04:34,846 --> 00:04:37,107
That's why I started doing yoga.
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00:04:37,192 --> 00:04:39,054
Now I can touch my knees.
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00:04:39,139 --> 00:04:42,731
And everything at the community
center is donation-based.
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That means it's free.
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00:04:44,738 --> 00:04:46,558
Who's ready for fun?
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Buckle up, the Kids Club train
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is about to blast off,
honk-honk!
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00:04:51,643 --> 00:04:53,958
Lot of mixed metaphors,
but love her energy.
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00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:55,426
Those lucky little bastards.
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00:04:55,511 --> 00:04:59,222
Let's get the wiggles out
before story time starts.
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00:04:59,346 --> 00:05:00,910
Hmm. Kids Club.
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00:05:03,121 --> 00:05:05,130
Oh, wow! hello. Uh, um...
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00:05:05,215 --> 00:05:06,435
Are you looking for swimming?
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00:05:06,519 --> 00:05:08,239
I think they usually do it
in the pool.
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00:05:08,324 --> 00:05:10,778
Uh, I think I'm supposed
to be here?
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00:05:10,863 --> 00:05:12,661
Oh. Um, what's your name?
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00:05:12,746 --> 00:05:14,348
- Gene.
- Hi, Gene.
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00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,958
I'm Miss Erica.
Gene, Gene.
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00:05:17,043 --> 00:05:18,794
I don't see you
on my roster.
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00:05:18,879 --> 00:05:20,364
Did your parents sign you up?
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00:05:20,449 --> 00:05:22,950
Um, yeah, like a second ago.
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00:05:23,035 --> 00:05:24,851
Well, then it's just not
in the system yet.
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00:05:24,945 --> 00:05:27,325
How, um, old are you, Gene?
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00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:29,684
Oh, I am... this many.
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00:05:29,769 --> 00:05:31,426
You're seven? Wow.
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00:05:31,511 --> 00:05:33,352
Somebody's eating
all their veggies.
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00:05:33,437 --> 00:05:34,620
Ha, no.
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00:05:34,705 --> 00:05:36,522
It's just, you're such
a big boy for seven.
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00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:38,122
- Very big.
- Thank you?
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00:05:38,207 --> 00:05:40,341
Do you have
any wiggles to get out?
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Do I!
My wiggles have wiggles.
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Yay! I'm young again!
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00:05:51,088 --> 00:05:52,934
Gene, where were you?
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Why are you so late?
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You did spend an awful long time
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00:05:56,222 --> 00:05:58,317
looking at that
community center job board.
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00:05:58,402 --> 00:06:00,075
So, what'd you pick?
I was a dog walker
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for my sixth grade
Life Skills pretend job.
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00:06:02,081 --> 00:06:04,700
I raked in eight fake bucks
an hour walking fake dogs.
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00:06:04,785 --> 00:06:06,997
- And I only got fake bit twice.
- Yup, uh...
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that's the job I picked, too,
dog walker.
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00:06:09,238 --> 00:06:10,795
And I'll be at Alex's house
after school
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00:06:10,879 --> 00:06:13,005
all this week, working
on the Life Skills project,
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00:06:13,090 --> 00:06:14,488
no need to check in.
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I'm not acting weird.
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00:06:16,043 --> 00:06:17,559
O-Okay...
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00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:20,106
Hey, Gene, how about you,
uh, come over and catch up
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00:06:20,191 --> 00:06:21,231
on your restaurant work?
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00:06:21,316 --> 00:06:23,762
Of course,
I love restaurant work.
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00:06:23,847 --> 00:06:24,921
Okay, what's going on?
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00:06:25,005 --> 00:06:27,257
Nothing.
What's going on with you?
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00:06:27,341 --> 00:06:28,942
This is a great conversation.
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00:06:29,027 --> 00:06:30,412
Why do you have glitter
on your chin
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and feathers sticking out
of your backpack?
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00:06:32,511 --> 00:06:34,997
- I got a job at Pickles?
- The strip club?
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00:06:35,082 --> 00:06:37,364
- It's a gentlemen's revue.
- Gene.
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00:06:37,449 --> 00:06:39,325
All right, fine,
I was at Kids Club.
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00:06:39,410 --> 00:06:41,653
Kids Club?
Isn't that for little kids?
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00:06:41,738 --> 00:06:42,551
Exactly.
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00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:44,349
I said I was seven,
and I just got to be young,
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00:06:44,433 --> 00:06:45,598
dumb, and full of fun.
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00:06:45,683 --> 00:06:47,729
Didn't anyone notice
that you don't at all
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00:06:47,814 --> 00:06:49,947
- look like a seven-year-old?
- How dare you?
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00:06:50,032 --> 00:06:52,111
Age is in the eye
of who's lying about it.
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00:06:52,196 --> 00:06:54,837
Actually, the hardest part
was getting signed out.
193
00:06:55,079 --> 00:06:58,245
Gene, buddy. We can't
let you leave without an adult.
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00:06:58,355 --> 00:06:59,407
An adult?
195
00:06:59,492 --> 00:07:02,150
Uh, hey, silver fox father
coming out of yoga.
196
00:07:02,235 --> 00:07:04,821
- Get over here.
- Uh, oh, o-okay.
197
00:07:04,970 --> 00:07:07,260
You got Gus to pretend to be
your dad and sign you out?
198
00:07:07,345 --> 00:07:10,150
He was so loose from that yoga,
he would have signed anything.
199
00:07:10,235 --> 00:07:12,947
Look, pal, I don't care
how you blow off your fake job,
200
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:14,636
but I don't like Tina having
to cover for you
201
00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,128
at your real job 'cause then she
doesn't cover for me as well.
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00:07:17,212 --> 00:07:18,737
- So get wiping.
- I will.
203
00:07:18,822 --> 00:07:20,127
But first, check this out.
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00:07:20,212 --> 00:07:21,710
I call it Feather Glitter Glue,
205
00:07:21,803 --> 00:07:23,895
and everyone said it was
the best name ever.
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00:07:24,048 --> 00:07:26,168
That's how easy it is to be
a seven-year-old.
207
00:07:26,659 --> 00:07:28,667
G'day, mate. Roommate.
208
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:30,572
You pumped about
coming over after school
209
00:07:30,657 --> 00:07:32,557
and getting into
some heavy duty budgeting?
210
00:07:32,721 --> 00:07:34,198
Oh, um, sorry, Alex.
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00:07:34,283 --> 00:07:36,542
I can't.
Still got to find a dang job.
212
00:07:36,627 --> 00:07:38,948
You can't buy fake
Ding Dongs and Ho Hos
213
00:07:39,033 --> 00:07:41,246
with no fake dough-dough,
right?
214
00:07:41,415 --> 00:07:42,655
Okay.
215
00:07:44,874 --> 00:07:46,430
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, Bob.
216
00:07:46,515 --> 00:07:48,226
- They're in here. That's them.
- Who?
217
00:07:48,311 --> 00:07:49,960
The hair people
who work next door.
218
00:07:50,045 --> 00:07:51,249
Don't look at 'em, don't look.
219
00:07:51,334 --> 00:07:52,983
But don't we want
to serve them food?
220
00:07:53,068 --> 00:07:54,109
Fine, I'll take their order.
221
00:07:54,193 --> 00:07:55,569
You can do this, Linda.
222
00:07:55,654 --> 00:07:58,498
- Do you want me to take...
- No, I can do it.
223
00:07:58,607 --> 00:08:01,108
Uh... h-hi, hello.
224
00:08:01,193 --> 00:08:02,577
Uh, can I take your order?
225
00:08:02,662 --> 00:08:05,132
We'll have one Burger of the Day
and fries to share. Thanks.
226
00:08:05,217 --> 00:08:06,843
Y-You work at Frolicles,
don't you?
227
00:08:06,928 --> 00:08:10,311
Yeah, I'm the receptionist.
She's the shampooer.
228
00:08:10,396 --> 00:08:13,678
You know, can I just say
that your hair is amazing?
229
00:08:13,763 --> 00:08:14,881
- So is yours.
- Mm. It is.
230
00:08:14,973 --> 00:08:17,526
You should come in sometime.
Yvonne can fix that.
231
00:08:17,611 --> 00:08:19,487
She could totally fix that.
232
00:08:19,572 --> 00:08:21,209
Fix what?
Who's Yvonne?
233
00:08:21,294 --> 00:08:22,897
Yvonne is the stylist.
234
00:08:22,982 --> 00:08:24,959
- And a visionary.
- Oh!
235
00:08:25,055 --> 00:08:27,706
Yeah, you're what Yvonne would
call a "caterpillar head."
236
00:08:27,807 --> 00:08:29,936
She can turn you
into a butterfly head.
237
00:08:30,522 --> 00:08:33,812
You know what, Yvonne has
an opening Thursday at 3:00.
238
00:08:33,897 --> 00:08:35,857
I'm gonna give it to you
because you deserve it.
239
00:08:35,941 --> 00:08:38,199
And you can get the friends
and neighbors discount.
240
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:41,310
Caterpillar head,
Thursday at 3:00. Okay.
241
00:08:41,463 --> 00:08:44,205
- Wha... Uh, I-I don't know.
- You're in. You're booked.
242
00:08:44,373 --> 00:08:45,182
Yvonne's gonna change your life.
243
00:08:45,282 --> 00:08:46,532
Get used to it.
Get ready.
244
00:08:46,617 --> 00:08:48,206
You're speechless,
you don't know what to say.
245
00:08:48,290 --> 00:08:51,419
- We do need food, though.
- Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay, okay.
246
00:08:51,504 --> 00:08:52,893
What just happened?
247
00:08:52,978 --> 00:08:55,709
Are you gonna get amazing hair
and then leave me?
248
00:08:55,794 --> 00:08:57,914
- I don't know.
- Well, you won't make it far,
249
00:08:57,999 --> 00:09:01,190
because Gretchen will hunt you
down and then she'll murder you.
250
00:09:01,275 --> 00:09:03,119
I know. Oh, God, she's here.
251
00:09:03,204 --> 00:09:04,129
Oh, it's Tina and Louise.
252
00:09:04,226 --> 00:09:06,144
Hi, girls.
253
00:09:06,229 --> 00:09:08,511
Why are you ducking
behind the counter?
254
00:09:08,596 --> 00:09:10,041
- That's fun.
- Where's your brother?
255
00:09:10,126 --> 00:09:12,839
- Oh, right, he's at Alex's.
- He better be at Alex's.
256
00:09:12,924 --> 00:09:15,338
Leaving us... mostly you...
Doing all his work.
257
00:09:15,423 --> 00:09:17,585
I'm sure he got all the Kids
Club stuff out of his system.
258
00:09:17,669 --> 00:09:19,550
How long can an 11-year-old boy
play with blocks?
259
00:09:19,634 --> 00:09:21,310
I love blocks!
260
00:09:21,395 --> 00:09:23,010
- That's so tall.
- I know.
261
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:26,541
But not too tall
for the Hand Monster.
262
00:09:27,592 --> 00:09:29,269
Gene, do you want to do clay
with me?
263
00:09:29,354 --> 00:09:32,096
Clay?
I'll never say nay to clay.
264
00:09:34,033 --> 00:09:35,822
- You're my best friend.
- Aw.
265
00:09:35,907 --> 00:09:37,999
A little quick,
but sure, why not?
266
00:09:38,084 --> 00:09:41,666
Okay, everybody,
who's ready for parachute time?
267
00:09:41,782 --> 00:09:44,282
- Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me!
- Parachute!
268
00:09:46,330 --> 00:09:48,447
♪ All the colorsof the rainbow ♪
269
00:09:48,532 --> 00:09:50,457
♪ Blow down onto my mind ♪
270
00:09:51,274 --> 00:09:53,440
♪ I'm gonna sit on my behind ♪
271
00:09:53,609 --> 00:09:55,943
♪ Until it's time for me ♪
272
00:09:56,037 --> 00:09:57,128
♪ To play with you ♪
273
00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:58,956
♪ I remember when my life ♪
274
00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:00,298
♪ It used to be ♪
275
00:10:00,467 --> 00:10:01,959
♪ Nothing but simplicity ♪
276
00:10:02,043 --> 00:10:03,301
♪ It was naptime ♪
277
00:10:03,528 --> 00:10:05,528
♪ That was the time ♪
278
00:10:05,613 --> 00:10:06,725
- ♪ That I would close my eyes. ♪
- Gene?
279
00:10:06,809 --> 00:10:09,271
- Still sleeping here.
- Gene!
280
00:10:09,458 --> 00:10:11,200
Alex! Hi, uh...
281
00:10:11,294 --> 00:10:12,477
Why are you in Kids Club?
282
00:10:12,562 --> 00:10:14,654
Lower your voice, it's naptime.
283
00:10:14,873 --> 00:10:16,399
Gene, buddy, uh...
284
00:10:16,483 --> 00:10:17,975
where are you going,
and who is this?
285
00:10:18,060 --> 00:10:20,653
Oh, uh, this is just a kid
who lives across the street.
286
00:10:20,738 --> 00:10:22,888
- He babysits me sometimes.
- Mm.
287
00:10:22,973 --> 00:10:24,898
Well,
please don't leave the room.
288
00:10:24,983 --> 00:10:27,412
And let's use
our nap voices, 'kay?
289
00:10:27,604 --> 00:10:28,705
What are you doing here?
290
00:10:28,790 --> 00:10:30,584
I came here to look
at the job board again
291
00:10:30,669 --> 00:10:32,422
and see if I could nail
something down for you,
292
00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:33,943
and I heard you snoring.
293
00:10:34,028 --> 00:10:35,504
- You know my snore?
- Yes.
294
00:10:35,589 --> 00:10:37,811
- That's really sweet.
- What are you doing here?
295
00:10:37,896 --> 00:10:39,983
I signed up
for after-school Kids Club.
296
00:10:40,077 --> 00:10:41,326
I'm reliving my youth.
297
00:10:41,437 --> 00:10:44,186
Wait, so you've been flaking
on our project to do this?
298
00:10:44,271 --> 00:10:47,263
I'm sorry, Alex. I just
really like the vibe in here.
299
00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:48,754
It's very low stress.
300
00:10:48,907 --> 00:10:51,257
Miss Erica even helps me
tie my shoes sometimes.
301
00:10:51,342 --> 00:10:53,640
And as you know,
I am not a strong shoe-tier.
302
00:10:53,725 --> 00:10:55,632
Well, what about
the Life Skills project?
303
00:10:55,717 --> 00:10:57,146
You're supposed to be
my roommate.
304
00:10:57,231 --> 00:10:58,582
What about making a budget?
305
00:10:58,667 --> 00:10:59,880
I'm not ready for budgets.
306
00:10:59,965 --> 00:11:01,624
- I do blocks now.
- Gene.
307
00:11:01,709 --> 00:11:04,279
- Want to pretend we're puppies?
- Give me a second, Ryder.
308
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:06,756
- But probably, yes.
- I'm Gene's best friend.
309
00:11:06,841 --> 00:11:08,279
The hell, Gene?
You know what?
310
00:11:08,364 --> 00:11:09,913
I think we should have
a roommate breakup.
311
00:11:09,997 --> 00:11:11,305
I'm gonna talk to Ms. Twitchell
312
00:11:11,390 --> 00:11:13,357
about getting a studio apartment
for one.
313
00:11:13,442 --> 00:11:16,226
- Fine.
- Okay, well, have fun with Ryder.
314
00:11:16,311 --> 00:11:18,115
Uh, we're playing puppies,
so, yeah,
315
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,529
I'm gonna be having fun.
316
00:11:20,951 --> 00:11:23,717
Bad dog, Gene.
Bad dog.
317
00:11:28,076 --> 00:11:29,795
Talk about coloring
inside the lines.
318
00:11:29,890 --> 00:11:32,308
I know,
my coloring game is incredible.
319
00:11:32,392 --> 00:11:33,968
And sure, Alex has a right
320
00:11:34,053 --> 00:11:36,022
to be a little annoyed
that I've been skipping
321
00:11:36,107 --> 00:11:39,194
all of our after-school
be-a-dumb-adult project time,
322
00:11:39,279 --> 00:11:40,819
but I wish he would see
that I'm living
323
00:11:40,904 --> 00:11:43,178
my best seven-year-old life
right now.
324
00:11:43,263 --> 00:11:44,779
Uh, except that you're 11.
325
00:11:44,864 --> 00:11:46,725
- Just like Alex.
- That's ageist.
326
00:11:46,810 --> 00:11:48,686
And guess who else has a right
to be annoyed?
327
00:11:48,771 --> 00:11:52,029
I had to delegate so much work
to Tina today, I'm exhausted.
328
00:11:52,123 --> 00:11:55,406
- Yeah, I'm kind of tired, too.
- Tina, it's not all about you.
329
00:11:55,505 --> 00:11:57,334
Well, I'm sorry,
but I need this.
330
00:11:57,419 --> 00:11:59,827
And it's totally worth it.
Tomorrow's a big day.
331
00:11:59,912 --> 00:12:01,077
We're making slime.
332
00:12:01,162 --> 00:12:03,194
Uh, and it's your last chance
to work with Alex
333
00:12:03,279 --> 00:12:05,082
on the project
before it's due Friday, right?
334
00:12:05,166 --> 00:12:06,162
Alex will be fine.
335
00:12:06,247 --> 00:12:07,507
He's gonna talk to Ms. Twitchell
336
00:12:07,591 --> 00:12:10,851
and do a solo no roommate
a-dull-t project.
337
00:12:10,936 --> 00:12:12,180
But won't you get an "F"?
338
00:12:12,265 --> 00:12:13,850
And get sent back
to second grade?
339
00:12:13,935 --> 00:12:15,951
- I hope so.
- Gene, no.
340
00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:17,852
But if you do get sent back
to second grade,
341
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:19,726
I think I left my pencil
in that classroom.
342
00:12:19,811 --> 00:12:21,126
Will you keep
an eye out for it?
343
00:12:21,211 --> 00:12:23,368
It's yellow
and it has a number two on it.
344
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:24,837
Gene, Gene, Gene.
345
00:12:24,922 --> 00:12:26,050
Do you want to play clay
with me?
346
00:12:26,134 --> 00:12:27,677
Uh, I'm kind of doing slime.
347
00:12:27,762 --> 00:12:29,197
You know,
'cause it's slime day.
348
00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:30,356
Play clay with me.
349
00:12:30,441 --> 00:12:31,884
Maybe later, 'kay, Ryder?
350
00:12:31,969 --> 00:12:32,868
You're a poo-poo head.
351
00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:35,142
That's not technically true,
Ryder.
352
00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,122
- Um, Becca, that's my slime.
- Mine!
353
00:12:38,207 --> 00:12:40,298
I mean, I can give you
a little bit.
354
00:12:40,429 --> 00:12:42,026
Aah!
355
00:12:42,128 --> 00:12:43,536
- Whee!
- Uh-oh, Mess Patrol.
356
00:12:43,688 --> 00:12:45,296
♪ Clean the mess, tidy up ♪
357
00:12:45,381 --> 00:12:47,032
♪ Yes Yes Yes
Mess Patrol... ♪
358
00:12:47,117 --> 00:12:49,829
Singing doesn't help
in this particular situation!
359
00:12:50,702 --> 00:12:53,502
Okay, it's time for
my appointment with Yvonne.
360
00:12:53,587 --> 00:12:54,682
Okay, have fun.
361
00:12:54,767 --> 00:12:56,225
I'm just gonna have her
touch it up.
362
00:12:56,309 --> 00:12:57,383
It's no big deal.
363
00:12:57,535 --> 00:12:58,636
Gretchen!
364
00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,290
- What are you doing hair...
- I mean here?
365
00:13:01,391 --> 00:13:02,407
Nice.
366
00:13:02,709 --> 00:13:04,894
Oh, I just came in to say hi,
367
00:13:04,979 --> 00:13:06,134
have a little lunch.
368
00:13:06,219 --> 00:13:08,362
That's good, 'cause we have
lunch. That's our thing.
369
00:13:08,447 --> 00:13:10,238
Yeah. I haven't seen you
in a while, Linda.
370
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:13,150
Let's catch up, girl talk.
You can talk, too, Bob.
371
00:13:13,235 --> 00:13:15,830
- Looking good, by the way.
- Uh, th-thanks, Gretchen.
372
00:13:15,915 --> 00:13:18,154
- Hey, were you going somewhere?
- No...
373
00:13:18,239 --> 00:13:20,573
I just like to move
my purse around
374
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:21,741
every once in a while.
375
00:13:21,909 --> 00:13:23,760
Okay, that's enough.
Here comes the apron.
376
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:26,088
So, new salon next door, huh?
377
00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:28,088
Wha... Where? A salon?
378
00:13:28,173 --> 00:13:30,575
- Yeah, oh, yeah, I hardly noticed.
- They're fancy.
379
00:13:30,659 --> 00:13:32,751
Looks like they sweep up
all the hair.
380
00:13:32,836 --> 00:13:33,899
La-di-da.
381
00:13:33,984 --> 00:13:36,079
Listen, I know they're
right next door
382
00:13:36,164 --> 00:13:38,164
and their scissors aren't rusty
383
00:13:38,249 --> 00:13:39,933
and their combs have
all their teeth
384
00:13:40,018 --> 00:13:41,503
and they don't have flies,
385
00:13:41,596 --> 00:13:43,762
but please
don't ever go there, okay?
386
00:13:43,847 --> 00:13:46,411
Yeah, no, of course not.
Yeah, no. Yuck. Oof.
387
00:13:46,495 --> 00:13:48,907
I don't even want to think
about you going there.
388
00:13:48,992 --> 00:13:51,259
I just go to a dark place.
389
00:13:51,493 --> 00:13:54,478
A dark, dark place.
390
00:13:54,563 --> 00:13:56,236
Oh, uh, the spoon!
391
00:13:56,321 --> 00:13:58,533
Plus, can you even imagine
what they'd do
392
00:13:58,618 --> 00:14:01,549
to your reverse cowlick and
your swirly thing in the back
393
00:14:01,634 --> 00:14:04,791
and your stubborn grays
and your bleeding ear problem?
394
00:14:04,876 --> 00:14:06,720
- They don't know you.
- Uh...
395
00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:08,415
Burger of the Day sound good?
396
00:14:08,500 --> 00:14:10,386
Let me walk this order
back to Bob in the kitchen.
397
00:14:10,470 --> 00:14:12,674
Uh, you can just hand it to me.
I'm right here.
398
00:14:12,759 --> 00:14:15,283
No, no, you might drop it.
I-I'm gonna walk it back.
399
00:14:15,368 --> 00:14:17,169
- Bob, I can't go next door.
- Why?
400
00:14:17,253 --> 00:14:18,932
Because Gretchen is terrifying?
401
00:14:19,017 --> 00:14:20,526
Yeah, so y...
So you're gonna go for me.
402
00:14:20,610 --> 00:14:21,611
Wait, wait, what?
403
00:14:21,696 --> 00:14:22,978
If I'm a last-second no-show,
404
00:14:23,063 --> 00:14:24,542
I'll never get
an appointment there again.
405
00:14:24,626 --> 00:14:27,533
You have to go, get a haircut,
and get me rescheduled.
406
00:14:27,618 --> 00:14:29,814
So we're gonna get
two expensive haircuts?
407
00:14:29,899 --> 00:14:32,049
They're discounted
expensive haircuts.
408
00:14:32,134 --> 00:14:34,165
Please, Bob,
I want a fancy salon haircut
409
00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:36,024
once in my life before I die.
410
00:14:36,329 --> 00:14:38,377
- Fine.
- No, no, where are you going?
411
00:14:38,462 --> 00:14:40,861
Not the front. She'll see you.
Go out the back.
412
00:14:40,946 --> 00:14:43,345
And run, but don't be sweaty.
And check your breath.
413
00:14:46,329 --> 00:14:47,471
Oh...
414
00:14:47,657 --> 00:14:50,275
H... Um, hi.
I'm here for my wife.
415
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,814
Uh, she can't come,
so she asked me
416
00:14:52,899 --> 00:14:55,572
- to take her spot?
- Oh, smart move, wife.
417
00:14:55,657 --> 00:14:56,939
Also, yeah, you could use it.
418
00:14:57,024 --> 00:14:59,205
- Come on, let's get you shampooed.
- Oh, that's okay.
419
00:14:59,290 --> 00:15:03,382
I washed it yester...
last week... ago.
420
00:15:03,466 --> 00:15:05,978
Can I get you a sparkling water
or espresso?
421
00:15:06,063 --> 00:15:09,038
- Or a glass of wine?
- Oh, um, I don't know.
422
00:15:09,142 --> 00:15:10,650
- I...
- I'd have all three.
423
00:15:10,735 --> 00:15:12,353
We call that
"getting your tips frosted."
424
00:15:12,438 --> 00:15:13,933
Unless you're getting
your tips frosted,
425
00:15:14,017 --> 00:15:15,588
which is actually really hot
right now
426
00:15:15,673 --> 00:15:17,268
with middle-aged men
who don't know better.
427
00:15:17,352 --> 00:15:19,369
All right, let's frost my tips.
428
00:15:19,454 --> 00:15:21,200
Uh, the-the drinks one.
429
00:15:22,770 --> 00:15:23,854
Hey, Gene.
430
00:15:24,001 --> 00:15:26,752
Everything okay?
You're not wiggling much.
431
00:15:26,837 --> 00:15:29,276
I don't always have the wiggles,
Miss Erica!
432
00:15:29,361 --> 00:15:30,912
Sorry, sorry.
433
00:15:32,253 --> 00:15:34,596
Can I come in?
434
00:15:34,681 --> 00:15:36,823
No. Get out of here.
435
00:15:36,907 --> 00:15:39,150
Where is your mom?
436
00:15:39,235 --> 00:15:42,496
Gretchen killed her,
and you're next.
437
00:15:42,580 --> 00:15:45,074
Bob, it's okay.
Gretchen went back to work.
438
00:15:45,158 --> 00:15:47,111
- Oh, she's alive.
- Eh?
439
00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:49,493
New do for Daddy.
440
00:15:49,578 --> 00:15:51,947
It is. Oh, it is.
441
00:15:52,032 --> 00:15:54,767
- So? Was it...?
- -Amazing.
442
00:15:54,851 --> 00:15:56,596
Yvonne is a genius.
443
00:15:56,681 --> 00:15:58,557
- Are you drunk?
- I'm gorgeous.
444
00:15:58,642 --> 00:16:00,272
O-Ok-Okay, settle down.
445
00:16:00,356 --> 00:16:02,074
And I got you in the book.
446
00:16:02,175 --> 00:16:03,924
- Yeah? When, when?
- Today!
447
00:16:04,009 --> 00:16:05,900
- Oh!
- They squeezed you in at 5:00.
448
00:16:05,985 --> 00:16:07,354
Really? Okay!
449
00:16:07,438 --> 00:16:08,931
Okay,
I'm actually gonna do this.
450
00:16:09,015 --> 00:16:10,908
I'm gonna go to the bathroom
and look at myself
451
00:16:10,993 --> 00:16:12,284
for a while,
and I have to pee.
452
00:16:12,368 --> 00:16:14,374
I drank so many
different drinks.
453
00:16:16,454 --> 00:16:20,080
"A dog sits on a log
with a frog."
454
00:16:20,165 --> 00:16:21,612
- Where are you going with that?
- Mm...
455
00:16:21,696 --> 00:16:23,447
That doesn't go on me, Mason.
456
00:16:23,532 --> 00:16:26,002
- Aah! That's it! I'm out!
- Gene,
457
00:16:26,087 --> 00:16:27,391
if you don't want to listen
to the book,
458
00:16:27,475 --> 00:16:29,908
you're welcome to join Piper
over by the puzzles.
459
00:16:29,993 --> 00:16:31,557
Nope, I think I'm gonna go.
460
00:16:31,642 --> 00:16:32,985
I'm sorry, buddy.
461
00:16:33,070 --> 00:16:34,775
You can't go until pickup time.
462
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:36,308
Miss Erica,
here's the thing...
463
00:16:36,392 --> 00:16:38,218
You're gonna laugh
when you hear this...
464
00:16:38,302 --> 00:16:40,979
I'm not actually seven.
I am 11.
465
00:16:41,063 --> 00:16:42,631
And I am a 500-year-old wizard!
466
00:16:42,715 --> 00:16:45,704
Not helping, Becca.
467
00:16:45,789 --> 00:16:47,807
Gene, I know you're not seven.
468
00:16:47,892 --> 00:16:49,642
It's pretty obvious,
'cause, you know,
469
00:16:49,727 --> 00:16:51,119
I know what children look like.
470
00:16:51,204 --> 00:16:54,299
- Gotcha.
- -I'm sorry, but I am leaving!
471
00:16:54,384 --> 00:16:56,439
You can't go without
someone signing you out,
472
00:16:56,524 --> 00:16:57,922
no matter what age
you say you are.
473
00:16:58,006 --> 00:16:59,658
Okay, fine, my dad Gus,
474
00:16:59,743 --> 00:17:02,494
who I call Gus and not Dad,
is over in yoga right now.
475
00:17:02,579 --> 00:17:05,057
- He can sign me out.
- There is no yoga on Thursdays.
476
00:17:05,142 --> 00:17:06,971
What? Why no yoga
on Thursdays?
477
00:17:07,056 --> 00:17:08,597
That's, like,
when you need it the most!
478
00:17:08,681 --> 00:17:10,564
Sorry,
you're gonna have to stay here
479
00:17:10,649 --> 00:17:12,085
until a parent signs you out.
480
00:17:12,169 --> 00:17:14,271
But I want to go!
I need to leave!
481
00:17:14,355 --> 00:17:15,885
Oh, man,
I'm gonna fail the project,
482
00:17:15,970 --> 00:17:17,971
and Alex is gonna be mad at me
forever!
483
00:17:18,056 --> 00:17:19,484
- Your babysitter?
- Yes!
484
00:17:19,698 --> 00:17:21,300
I should've been doing
pretend roommate stuff
485
00:17:21,384 --> 00:17:23,322
with him this whole week,
but now I'm trapped
486
00:17:23,407 --> 00:17:24,588
in this booger parlor!
487
00:17:24,673 --> 00:17:25,932
What's wrong with me?!
488
00:17:26,017 --> 00:17:28,268
Someone's having big feelings.
489
00:17:28,352 --> 00:17:31,774
Hell yeah, I am!
When's juice and crackers?
490
00:17:34,529 --> 00:17:37,025
Miss Erica,
can I get my one phone call?
491
00:17:37,110 --> 00:17:38,471
Gene, this isn't jail.
492
00:17:38,556 --> 00:17:40,502
Says the lady who can leave
whenever she wants.
493
00:17:40,587 --> 00:17:43,611
You think I can leave?
I've had to pee for three hours.
494
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:45,166
Yes, you can use the phone.
495
00:17:45,251 --> 00:17:48,071
- Dial nine to get out.
- Oh, if only it was that easy.
496
00:17:49,798 --> 00:17:52,657
Bob's Slopshop, this is Tina.
I have weird neck sweat.
497
00:17:52,742 --> 00:17:55,228
- How may I help you?
- My neck sweat's not weird. Is it?
498
00:17:55,313 --> 00:17:57,838
Louise, it's Gene. Listen,
I'm trapped in Kids Club.
499
00:17:57,923 --> 00:18:00,447
There's no yoga on Thursdays,
and Miss Erica won't let me out.
500
00:18:00,532 --> 00:18:02,666
Please help me.
I want to be a tween again.
501
00:18:02,751 --> 00:18:04,947
I need to go to Alex's house,
or he'll hate me
502
00:18:05,032 --> 00:18:06,637
and we'll never be
real-life roomies.
503
00:18:06,722 --> 00:18:09,668
I guess I could help if you did
all my restaurant stuff
504
00:18:09,753 --> 00:18:11,052
- for the rest of my life.
- One week.
505
00:18:11,136 --> 00:18:13,691
- Sold. What do you want me to do?
- I need you and Tina
506
00:18:13,776 --> 00:18:15,684
to pretend to be Gus
and sign me out.
507
00:18:15,769 --> 00:18:17,129
Pretend to be Gus.
508
00:18:17,214 --> 00:18:19,902
Yeah, get a long trench coat,
climb on Tina's shoulders,
509
00:18:19,987 --> 00:18:21,387
fake beard...
Boom, you're Gus.
510
00:18:21,472 --> 00:18:23,527
- That's not gonna...
- Get me out of here.
511
00:18:23,612 --> 00:18:25,091
I'm, like, three seconds away
from getting
512
00:18:25,175 --> 00:18:26,645
the hand, foot
and mouth disease.
513
00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:29,168
All right, all right.
We're on our way.
514
00:18:29,253 --> 00:18:31,207
Why aren't you sleeping,
Gene?
515
00:18:31,292 --> 00:18:32,949
'Cause I'm getting out of here,
Ryder.
516
00:18:33,034 --> 00:18:34,356
I'm too old for this place.
517
00:18:34,441 --> 00:18:35,582
But you savor this.
518
00:18:35,667 --> 00:18:37,879
Savor every perfect,
carefree minute
519
00:18:37,964 --> 00:18:40,249
- of being a little kid, 'kay?
- 'Kay, bye.
520
00:18:41,406 --> 00:18:42,488
Hello, um...
521
00:18:42,573 --> 00:18:44,578
What? Louise!
You brought Dad?
522
00:18:44,688 --> 00:18:46,821
Sorry. This is the only thing
we could think of,
523
00:18:46,906 --> 00:18:48,629
after not thinking
for very long,
524
00:18:48,714 --> 00:18:50,012
because this has to end.
525
00:18:50,097 --> 00:18:52,910
Oh, my God,
Gene really crashed a day care?
526
00:18:52,995 --> 00:18:55,488
I didn't crash it.
I wiggled my way in.
527
00:18:55,573 --> 00:18:58,649
- You're Gene's real father, I take it?
- Yeah. Yes.
528
00:18:58,734 --> 00:19:00,941
So, I've been letting him
get signed out
529
00:19:01,026 --> 00:19:03,029
by whoever
that 80-year-old man was. Cool.
530
00:19:03,113 --> 00:19:05,973
Gene, do you want to tell me
about that real quick?
531
00:19:06,058 --> 00:19:07,457
- It was Gus.
- Okay.
532
00:19:07,542 --> 00:19:09,699
I think I have to buy him
a Father's Day present.
533
00:19:09,784 --> 00:19:13,738
You should, and also me,
one, as well, at some point.
534
00:19:13,823 --> 00:19:15,598
So, you're signing
Gene out?
535
00:19:15,683 --> 00:19:17,379
- Yes.
- I love your hair, by the way.
536
00:19:17,464 --> 00:19:19,469
- Me, too.
- He's taken.
537
00:19:20,956 --> 00:19:23,348
Got room for bunk beds
in that studio apartment?
538
00:19:23,441 --> 00:19:25,309
Gene?
What are you doing here?
539
00:19:25,394 --> 00:19:26,957
I came to say sorry.
540
00:19:27,042 --> 00:19:28,074
What about Kids Club?
541
00:19:28,159 --> 00:19:29,324
I'm done with all that.
542
00:19:29,409 --> 00:19:31,121
I know what being
seven is like.
543
00:19:31,206 --> 00:19:33,645
I think I'm ready
for stuff I don't know.
544
00:19:33,730 --> 00:19:36,715
Future stuff, like, maybe
one day I'll have an alcohol,
545
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,824
or I'll listen to informative
podcasts on my commute.
546
00:19:39,909 --> 00:19:42,098
So, will you take me back
as your roomie?
547
00:19:42,183 --> 00:19:44,715
Even though I acted
like a snotty seven-year-old?
548
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:46,676
Sure. Rents are outrageous.
549
00:19:46,761 --> 00:19:48,310
I've been driving
a pretend Uber at night
550
00:19:48,394 --> 00:19:49,809
just to pay the pretend bills.
551
00:19:49,894 --> 00:19:51,012
Plus, I love bunk beds.
552
00:19:51,097 --> 00:19:52,747
I don't know why
we didn't think of that before.
553
00:19:52,831 --> 00:19:55,113
Now we have more room
for that hot fudge sundae bar.
554
00:19:55,198 --> 00:19:57,410
Is there still space
for our rotating DJ booth?
555
00:19:57,495 --> 00:19:59,965
- 'Cause that's a must-have.
- DJ booth bunk beds?
556
00:20:00,050 --> 00:20:03,706
DJ booth bunk beds!
We're so good at being adults!
557
00:20:03,927 --> 00:20:06,620
Oh, you've got a lot going on
back here.
558
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:08,487
Yeah.
I got a reverse cowlick.
559
00:20:08,572 --> 00:20:10,348
Okay. It's, like, pulling
my hand in.
560
00:20:10,433 --> 00:20:12,107
Sorry. I'm sure
Yvonne will know what to do
561
00:20:12,191 --> 00:20:13,662
- with that, right?
- Oh, sure, sure.
562
00:20:13,746 --> 00:20:15,906
Everyone's hair is the same
to Yvonne.
563
00:20:15,990 --> 00:20:17,701
Everyone's
a butterfly head
564
00:20:17,785 --> 00:20:19,038
- waiting to happen.
- Oh.
565
00:20:19,123 --> 00:20:21,707
This'll be here for when
you come out from under.
566
00:20:21,792 --> 00:20:23,118
And you're lucky.
567
00:20:23,203 --> 00:20:25,276
We're not gonna be
in this location for much longer.
568
00:20:25,361 --> 00:20:26,767
- Yeah.
- Our prices are too high
569
00:20:26,852 --> 00:20:28,648
- for this neighborhood.
- Oh, yeah?
570
00:20:28,733 --> 00:20:30,308
You've seen this
neighborhood, right?
571
00:20:30,393 --> 00:20:32,032
Um, yes, I have.
572
00:20:32,117 --> 00:20:34,001
So make sure you take our card
when you leave.
573
00:20:34,086 --> 00:20:36,231
'Cause what you want to do is
get with one stylist
574
00:20:36,316 --> 00:20:39,168
who knows your hair
but also knows you as a person.
575
00:20:39,253 --> 00:20:40,938
And once
you find that stylist,
576
00:20:41,023 --> 00:20:42,362
you never want
to give them up.
577
00:20:42,447 --> 00:20:44,767
Oh, my God.
I am so sorry.
578
00:20:44,852 --> 00:20:47,117
I just remembered
I have to be somewhere.
579
00:20:49,128 --> 00:20:50,578
Bye!
Sorry, bye.
580
00:20:51,742 --> 00:20:54,430
Got room
for a reverse cowlick?
581
00:20:54,526 --> 00:20:55,773
Linda?
582
00:20:56,820 --> 00:20:57,906
Oh, that wine.
583
00:20:58,414 --> 00:21:02,144
♪ DJ Bunk Beds ♪
584
00:21:02,284 --> 00:21:06,074
♪ DJ Bunk
Beds ♪
585
00:21:06,159 --> 00:21:08,168
♪ Treats, bunk-bed-sleep
and beats ♪
586
00:21:08,253 --> 00:21:10,145
♪ Make a tasty, funky result ♪
587
00:21:10,230 --> 00:21:12,105
♪ This is what it's like ♪
588
00:21:12,190 --> 00:21:14,620
♪ To be a responsible adult ♪
589
00:21:14,705 --> 00:21:16,531
- ♪ Ooh ♪
- ♪ Push up the faders ♪
590
00:21:16,616 --> 00:21:18,109
♪ Twist the knobs ♪
591
00:21:18,194 --> 00:21:20,037
♪ Pump up the beat,
pull the handle ♪
592
00:21:20,122 --> 00:21:22,057
♪ And bring that sweet, sweet
soft serve down ♪
593
00:21:22,142 --> 00:21:24,360
♪ DJ Bunk
Beds ♪
594
00:21:24,445 --> 00:21:25,884
♪ DJ Bunk Beds ♪
595
00:21:25,969 --> 00:21:28,274
♪ DJ Bunk
Beds ♪
596
00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:29,821
♪ DJ Bunk Beds. ♪
597
00:21:29,906 --> 00:21:31,047
Captioning sponsored by
BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT
598
00:21:31,131 --> 00:21:32,124
and TOYOTA.
599
00:21:32,216 --> 00:21:33,780
Sync corrections by srjanapala
45820
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