Original subtitles

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Anytime you meet a payment ♪

♪ Good times ♪ ♪ Anytime you need a friend ♪

♪ Good times ♪ ♪ Anytime you're out from under ♪

♪ Not gettin' hassled Not gettin' hustled ♪

♪ Keepin' your head above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Scratchin' and survivin' ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Hangin' in a chow line ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪

Mama, come on. Hurry up with my pants so I can get dressed.

Michael, when you rented this tuxedo,

didn't you notice that one leg was longer than the other?

Well, Ma, the tailor was a really good salesman. He told me the floor was slanted.

Ma, you know, I was really nervous. I've never rented a tuxedo before.

Well, I'm nervous now.

I've never had a daughter married before, and I've got to get dressed myself.

Flo, I gotta talk... Ooh, Gramps.

You mean to tell me...

you're embarrassed in front of your Aunt Willona?

Hmm? If I had a dollar for every time I talcumed your tush...

And what a cute tushy it was. Here, Michael.

It's finished.

Whoops! Oh, boy. Go on.

Flo, I gotta talk to you. Can't it wait till later, Willona?

I've got to get dressed now. No, Flo, it's gotta be now.

I cannot walk down the aisle this afternoon with Thelma as a maid of honor.

What? Yeah, I've been thinking about it all night long.

People are gonna be expecting a friend of the bride to come walking down the aisle.

You know, someone around her own age.

Is that what you're worried about?

Girl, you won't look more than a few years older than the bride.

How few?

Ten. Four?

- Eight. - Six?

Hold on, girl. You're gonna pass me.

Now, Willona, you know you can't disappoint Thelma and the rest of us.

You're right. I can't let her down. Of course not.

So what if I look almost 30 to some people?

Bookman. How nice you look.

Thank you. You know, this is the tuxedo that Violet and I got married in.

Looks like you could've held your reception in there too.

It fits pretty good. It was a little snug.

But last night, Violet let the pants out.

It only took her three hours.

Oh, here's a present for the bride.

Oh, how nice. Thank you, Bookman.

You're welcome. Well, see you at the church.

- Oh, by the way, where will I sit? - Where will you sit?

The first two rows.

And, Booger, please try not to lap over into the aisle.

Slip over, hang over.

Now I know I'd better get dressed.

Hey, Ma, you know the new eyelashes I bought? I can only find one!

I think I know why.

Why? You got them both on one eye.

Oh, my goodness! I didn't know! Ooh-hoo, boy!

I've never seen anybody so nervous.

Well, if Ginger Rogers were here,

she would swear I was Fred Astaire.

Well? You look more like Mr. Peanut.

Willona.

Oh, Ma, I just wanna look good for the wedding.

Well, you should look elegant. You're paying for the wedding.

But, son, I think the hat is a little too much.

It sort of makes you look like an out-of-work magician.

In that case, I won't show y'all the cape.

Now I know I'd better get dressed.

Oh, not again. I'll get it, Flo. Go on and start gettin' dressed.

Flo, get the pail and the mop. It's Weeping Wanda.

Oh, Flo. Wanda, what is it?

When I saw them deliver the flowers here...

Yes, they're for Thelma.

Oh, Flo. You're so brave.

How old was she when she passed on?

Wanda, you think Thelma's dead?

Don't say that horrible word!

Oh, Wanda, get a hold of yourself.

Thelma is getting married.

Married? Yes.

Oh, I'm so happy for you.

Well, thank you.

Well, either way, it's a puddle.

It's all so confusing.

Yes, yes, yes, Wanda.

I understand, sweetheart.

Ma, this is my getaway dress. Can you let it down a little bit for me?

All right, all right. You're wearing that dress on the honeymoon?

Of course. Well, knowing Keith, you won't need a getaway dress.

You'll need a breakaway dress.

J.J.

Ma, this is the last time.

Let me handle J.J.

Oh, yeah? Handle this.

Thelma, you may be my sister and you may be gettin' wed.

But that don't change the fact: You still a coconut head.

You know, J.J., you remind me of a writing utensil.

If you stand on your head, you'd look like a pencil.

Thelma, even though you look better than I've ever seen you,

if the school for ugly gave out a crown, they'd queen you.

I gotta get in on this one. Get him, Michael.

J.J., Brother, last night on TV, I thought I saw your face.

But the scientist said it was a black, ugly creature from outer space.

Michael, you may be smart when it comes to books.

But lookin' at your face, I wouldn't comment on looks.

All right, children. Hold on, Ma.

I'm not through yet.

Thelma, you're a pain and a pest,

and even though you're leaving the nest...

Well?

Even though you're leaving the nest,

Thelma, I'm gonna miss you.

I'm gonna miss you too, Thelma. Michael.

Miss you too, Michael.

Children, stop crying.

A wedding is supposed to be a happy occasion.

You're all acting as ridiculous as Wanda.

You're right. You're right, Ma.

Oh, Ma, take it easy.

Go over there and sit down on the couch. You'll feel better.

Ma, come on now. I just...

I just couldn't help thinking that...

after the wedding, you'll be gone.

Michael will be going away to college.

And I just told Bookman we're giving up the apartment.

Hey, Mama, don't worry. We gonna keep in touch.

Matter of fact, I'm gonna write you all the time.

And I'm gonna write you, Thelma, and you too, J.J.

I'll write you too, Michael. And you too, Mom.

I'll write you too, Thelma.

And I'll write Keith, and I'll write all the whole team.

I'll write the whole NFL, everyone in the league.

Yes, I will.

Hey, hold on. If we do all this letter writing,

we're gonna bring the post office to a standstill.

Michael, we can do that with two postcards.

Anyway, look at it this way.

We are finally getting out of the ghetto.

After all these years.

The Lord moves in mysterious ways.

Yeah, so does James Brown.

J.J., hush!

Hey, J.J., my man, that was rude, brother. Rude.

You mean to tell me that you ain't gonna invite...

Sweet Daddy inside for the prenuptials?

Hey, look, Sweets, it's bad luck for you to see the bride before the wedding.

Well, look, Sweet Daddy ain't marryin' her.

But I'm the one lent you the money to pay for her weddin'.

It's also bad luck for me to see you before the wedding.

J.J., can I talk to you for a second? Come on over here, boy.

Now look. When you borrowed the money,

you neglected to tell Sweet Daddy that you had lost your job.

Mm-hmm. Now, when Sweet Daddy finds out...

that one of his clients ain't telling him like it T-I is, he gets very, very hostile.

Right, boys?

I hope they just testin' melons for ripeness.

No, J.J., heads. A-whoop-whoop!

Now look, you owe Sweet Daddy, baby,

and he expects to be paid, because money... have mercy...

Is the root of all goodness.

Trust me, Sweet Daddy. I'll pay you back somehow.

I know you will, 'cause you're lucky.

See, Tight-lip Mary ran it down to me...

that your sister is marrying a big-time football player...

who is up for a million-dollar contract.

So Sweet Daddy's gonna use that sucker for collateral.

I'll pay you, Sweets. I'll pay you.

I know it. Wait a minute now.

I got something nice here for your pretty, little sister.

Tell her this is from Sweet Daddy.

Oh, thanks, Sweets. Hold on, brother.

Sweet Daddy didn't forget you. Got something nice for you.

Da-da!

Sweets, what's this? Oh, that?

That's the jawbone of the last dude who double-crossed Sweet Daddy.

Ciao.

Oh, Mr. Evans, may I see you for a few minutes?

Certainly, Mr. Webster. What can I do you for?

When you asked me to cater this wedding,

you didn't tell me the wedding list was so long.

Now I'm not going to have enough caviar.

Well, can't we get some Caviar Helper?

Very humorous, Mr. Evans.

Thank you so much.

Now, how much is a little more caviar gonna cost me?

$150.

$150?

What's your motto, "We shall overcharge"?

You certainly picked a strange time to economize, Mr. Evans.

Hmm.

J.J., something wrong? Are you having money problems?

Oh, no, Ma. Everything's fine. Everything's fine.

Flowers all around, everybody having a good time...

J.J., I'm your mother, and I wanna know the truth.

Well, uh, Ma, I, uh... I lost my job.

You lost your job? J.J., why didn't you tell me?

Thelma could have done fine with a small wedding.

Aw, Ma, a small wedding is fine for me and

Michael, but Thelma's the only girl in the family.

She should have something to remember.

I love you, Son. We'll work it out somehow.

You just remember, we're all in this together.

Mm-mmm! Thelma, you look gorgeous.

Oh, it's you, Mom.

You looked so lovely, I thought you were Thelma, baby.

Now, Keith, if you that blind, you shouldn't be playing ball.

You should be a referee.

Ma, would you come help me get dressed, please?

Ooh, Keith! Oh, my goodness! Don't look! Don't look!

Oh, knock it off, Thelma.

Keith here has seen that old bowling-ball head of yours. J.J.!

Watch it, my man. That's my nine-minutes-from-now

wife you're talking about there.

Just think, 20 years ago, I was helping Thelma get dressed...

and wishing for this day.

Now it's finally here, and I'm still helping Thelma get dressed.

J.J., my man, thanks for a beautiful wedding. No problem.

You sure you don't want me to pitch in for part of it? No, I can handle it.

I'm gonna be makin' lots of money as soon as I sign this contract.

I know this must be costing you an arm and a leg.

How'd you know? I mean, uh, just a mere pittance.

A mere bag of shells. Mere bag of shells.

If you need some money, I got it for you. Keith, J.J., how's it going?

Freddie, man, where you been? Huh?

The best man is supposed to be by the groom's side all the time.

I knew he'd be late. You got the ring? Relax, man.

I got the ring. I got it right here.

I mean, right here.

Ah, here it is. Right here, man.

Oh, that's my heartbeat. Um...

He lost the ring. I put it where I knew I wouldn't forget it.

All right. Ah!

Hello. Right.

Ma, you made sure I had something borrowed,

something blue, something new, but you forgot something old.

Oh, no, I didn't.

I've been waiting a long time to give you this.

Oh, Mom. I'm gonna give it right back after the wedding.

Oh, no, you won't. It's yours for keeps.

Oh, Ma, this is something you've always treasured.

That's why I'm giving it to you, honey.

My mother gave it to me, and she treasured it too.

Ma, I can't keep this.

Look, Thelma, there's still a few minutes before you become Mrs. Anderson.

Now, as your mother, I'm ordering you to keep that locket on,

or I'm gonna put you across my knee.

Okay, Ma, I'll never take it off.

Well, I better finish gettin' dressed.

Yep.

Are you ready for the cutest little flower girl that ever threw a rose petal?

Oh, isn't she precious?

I don't wanna be no flower girl.

I wanna be a bride and marry someone like Keith.

Aren't you kind of little to be thinking about marriage?

That never stopped Mickey Rooney.

Can I see Thelma? Or is it bad luck?

No, honey, it's the groom who can't see the bride before the wedding.

Then how does he know he's honeymooning with the right girl?

Uh, well, he looks at her driver's license.

And the monkey said, "Let's go into the bar!"

Whoo-whee! Keith, you look bad!

And I do mean good. Thank you.

Would you gentlemen mind posing for a picture

for my daughter? Not at all. Not at all.

Of course, she wants me in it. Come on, Penny. Come on in here. Let's do it.

J.J., you take the picture. Will you, please?

Go on, J.J. Take the shot. Thank you, darling.

Just one little snappy-poo.

All right. Everybody say "mozzarella."

Mozzarella. "Anchovy."

Anchovy. Look out. It's done.

Thank you. Willona, could I borrow this camera for a little bit?

Why? I wanna take a snapshot of the bride and groom...

and use it to paint an oil picture of them as my own personal wedding present.

Good idea, J.J.

Whoo!

My, my, my, my, my. Lookee here.

I know I'm in a church, but this is the first time...

I ever seen a walking stained glass window.

Pardon me.

She's just jealous. It ain't my fault she ain't pretty as Sweet Daddy.

What's happening, my man, J.J.?

Hi, Sweets.

All right, all right. Everybody, the wedding is starting.

You may take your places.

♪♪

♪ Here we are ♪

♪ On Earth together ♪

♪ It's you and I ♪

♪ God has made us ♪

♪ Fall in love ♪

♪ It's true ♪

♪ I've really found someone ♪

♪ Like you ♪

♪ Will it stay ♪

♪ The love you feel for me ♪

♪ Will it say ♪

♪ That you will be here by my side ♪

♪ To see me through ♪

♪ Until my life ♪

♪ Is through ♪

♪ Well, in my mind ♪

♪ We can conquer the world ♪

♪ In love, you and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ I am glad ♪

♪ At least in my life I've found someone ♪

♪ That may not be here forever ♪

♪ To see me through ♪

♪ But I found strength ♪

♪ In you ♪

♪ I only pray ♪

♪ That I have shown you ♪

♪ A brighter day ♪

♪ 'Cause that is all that I am living for ♪

♪ You see ♪

♪ Don't worry what happens ♪

♪ To me ♪

♪ 'Cause in my mind ♪

♪ You will stay here always ♪

♪ In love, you and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ In my mind ♪

♪ We can conquer the world ♪

♪ In love, you and I ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ You and ♪

♪ I ♪♪

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to join in holy matrimony...

Keith Albert Anderson and Thelma Ann Evans.

Now the bride and groom wish to share with you their own personal vows.

Thelma?

I take this vow to share with you...

that which God shall let me share;

to give to you that which God shall let me give;

to be one with you, for I love you...

and ask only that this love shall sustain itself...

for the rest of our lives.

I take this vow to love you as I do now and will forever...

and pray there be no bounds to this love...

so that it may grow stronger and stronger...

in all the years that God shall give us together.

Keith Anderson, do you take Thelma Evans...

to be your lawfully wedded wife?

I do.

Do you, Thelma Evans, take Keith Anderson to be your lawfully wedded husband?

I do.

The ring, please.

Would you place the ring on the bride's finger?

Then by the power vested in me in the state of Illinois,

I now pronounce you man and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

♪♪

Aah!

Keith!

My leg! Wait a minute.

Don't nobody move him. Don't move him.

Oh, my God. Somebody call an ambulance!

Is it that bad? It looks pretty bad.

Oh, no!

J.J., my man, you in trouble.

♪ Keepin' your head above water ♪

♪ Makin' a wave when you can ♪

♪ Temporary layoffs ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Easy credit rip-offs ♪ ♪ Good times ♪

♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em ♪

♪ Good times ♪♪ Good Times was videotaped before a studio audience.