Original subtitles

* Good times Any time you meet a payment *

* Good times Any time you need a friend *

* Good times Any time you're out from under *

* Not gettin' hassled Not gettin' hustled *

* Keepin' your head Above water *

* Makin' a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs Good times *

* Easy credit rip-offs Good times *

* Scratchin' and survivin' Good times *

* Hangin' in a chow line Good times *

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em? *

* Good times **

[HUMMING]

Hey, J.J.

Seems like you've been staring

at that canvas for over an hour.

What's the matter, you can't get started?

I'll tell you, Michael, there's just no inspiration.

It'll come.

You know, painting just doesn't come from the hands.

It's gotta come from... up here.

No wonder the canvas is empty.

Oh, yeah?

Well, I would paint your face,

but I don't feel like painting a dill pickle today.

Then why don't you paint your own face

and call it "The Birth of a Chicken"?

The birth of a chicken, you little turkey face!

[SHOUTING]

All right, children. All right!

I ain't heard so much noise since Gertie Vincent's parrot

got sucked into the vacuum cleaner.

Listen, the mood your father has been in lately,

you'd better not be fighting when he comes in.

That's for sure.

Daddy sure has been grouchy.

Last night, he yelled at me for a whole half an hour.

Don't complain.

He yelled at me for a half hour too.

Well, the problem is

you kids don't know how to handle Dad.

You see, he hasn't yelled at me all week.

Oh, what's the secret, honey?

The secret is, he hasn't spoken to me all week!

I tell you, it ain't been easy sleeping with him.

That man snores angry.

Honey, it don't surprise me none.

I met him in the elevator this morning.

I said, "Good morning, James."

He said, "Huh."

I said, "Nice day, huh, James?" He said, "Huh."

So I figured if you can't beat him, join him,

so I said, "Hmm-hmm."

He said, "Well, don't go telling me your troubles,"

and walked away.

Well, we're just gonna have to bear with him.

We all know he's not been himself lately.

Mama... I think I know

what the problem with Daddy is.

I think he's going through male menopause.

Michael, that's not so,

and where did you pick that up from?

In a magazine.

It said that a man goes through the same changes

as a woman does.

He gets bad-tempered and turns on his family,

but the family has to be patient with him,

try to understand him,

and hide behind Mama when he comes home.

Michael, your daddy has been under strain lately,

that's all.

But you're right about one thing.

if you kids really wanna help,

you'll try to do something nice for him.

Hey, Ma, that's a great idea,

and I got just the thing.

Thelma, why don't you run away from home?

Well, I got a better idea.

Why don't you stay here

and all the rest of us will run away?

Daddy was fine until you came home

with that $325 dentist bill!

Whoo, child, $325?

You could've bought a whole lot of chicken wings

with that.

I'm sure our dentist will.

J.J.: Hey, Ma...

You know what I think?

I think this is highway robbery.

I don't think we should pay this bill.

I mean, what kind of dentist

charges $325 for a mere 12 cavities?

Twelve cavities?

Honey, what you been brushing your teeth with,

hot-fudge sundae?

Well, there's no use crying about it.

The bill has got to be paid.

Well, maybe we could hawk Thelma,

that would be good for some small...

pocket change.

You think you got holes in your teeth?

Well, what about the one in that pointed head of yours?

You got some nerve, you guacamole dip--

I don't wanna hear that.

[DOOR SLAMS]

I am sick and tired of coming home every night

to a dog fight.

Just to make sure it don't happen again,

both of you are grounded for a month.

A whole month?

Aw, Daddy, I got dates and plans and--

Oh, Thelma, how selfish can you get?

Now, Dad,

I'm not speaking for me.

I'm speaking for all those chicks out there.

I mean, they gonna be uptight

if they have to go a whole month without Kid...

[CLAPS]

Dy-no-mite!

You heard me, junior, you're grounded for a month.

I'll see you all later.

And you, Michael--

Yes, Daddy?

Don't give me none of your disrespect.

You're grounded for a month too.

A month?

I'm not even old enough to go out at night yet!

James, don't you think

you're being a little hard on the children?

James, come on, give them a break--

Aw, you're grounded too.

Me, grounded? I don't even live here.

Well, thank you for small favors.

Well, I'd better not get into that,

or else I'll be grounded too.

Well, that just about does it, James.

You know what I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna take my groceries and go on to my own house...

and I ain't gonna never come back

to this house no more.

Until tomorrow.

You got that right.

Michael, honey, set the table for me. Okay.

Thelma, will you help me with dinner?

I'm running a little late. Sure, Ma.

Hey, Dad!

Uh, let me help you with that.

Junior, don't be grinning at me

with them $325 teeth.

Uh, let me help you with that, Dad.

Twelve cavities.

James, honey,

there is absolutely nothing we can do about it now.

Nothing except pay the $325 for his teeth.

Boy, if there ain't something stupid

coming out of his mouth,

there's something expensive going into it.

In addition to the $325 for his teeth,

I still ain't paid off the bills

on that gall-bladder operation of yours yet.

Honey, I'm sorry about the gallstones.

Oh, baby, don't worry about it.

Oh, it's just that I'm tired of living like this.

I mean, always behind.

Don't it bother you?

Well, somehow,

I just know we gonna make ends meet.

Yeah, well, I already reached my end.

Daddy, you always say that,

but yet you come back fighting.

You're the greatest. That's why we love you.

I love you too, son.

Good. Now, can you please take me off your grounded list?

Whoo, I'm just jivin', Daddy.

James, honey, there really is no need

to get so upset.

We agreed last night

we'd ask Betty and Edgar for the money.

Hey!

That's a great idea!

Ma's rich cousins come through again,

saved by the bell.

You know something, junior?

You keep popping them chops, you gonna be out for the count.

J.J...

Edgar has been an architect for a long time,

and he is comfortable, but they not rich.

James, can I ask-- Florida...

I been thinking about it,

and it's been sticking in my craw all day.

I ain't gonna ask your cousin for the money.

Why not? We borrowed from them before,

and we paid them back every cent.

I know that, Florida,

but we ain't never hit them up

for this kind of money before.

I mean, it was always $50 here, or $100 there,

but now between everything, we talking about $500.

Five hundred, Florida!

Oh, Edgar don't mind, and he's always so nice.

Yeah. That's the part I hate.

Where he get off being so nice?

Loan sharks ain't nice. Bankers ain't nice.

James, what is wrong with being nice?

It just ain't natural.

Boy, every time you borrow from him,

he always got that smile on his face.

You get behind in your payments, he don't never hound you.

He even have the nerve to ask, "Do you need some more?"

Why can't I borrow from a louse like everybody else?

Well, we've got to get the money somehow, James.

Well, Florida, I ain't going to the well no more.

I mean, we borrowed from Edgar when we first got married,

and we still borrowing from him.

That means we ain't moved one inch in 20 years.

That's not true, James.

We have a lot of things now

that we didn't have 20 years ago.

Yeah? Name one thing. Well--

Me!

Uh... moving on.

In case you've forgotten, James,

we used to live in a crummy one-room apartment.

Yeah, you got me there.

Now we live in a crummy three-room apartment.

We managed to raise a family,

a beautiful family.

All right, so we got a family.

I'm just thinking a man my age

ought to have more to show for it than that.

You know what I'm gonna leave the world

when I go, Florida?

A tombstone that reads:

"Here lies James Evans, back in the hole again."

Oh, now, honey, you're just upset, that's all.

You know, lately,

you've been putting in some long hours.

Yeah, you're right, baby. I'm tired too.

I think I'm gonna go lay down until dinner is ready.

I feel another one of them headaches coming on.

Hey, Dad, what kind of headache is it,

an Aspirin headache or Excedrin headache?

What's the difference, Dr. Cavity?

Uh, just trying to inject a little humor.

Well, you got the body for injecting.

You're built just like a hypodermic needle.

You got some nerve, you old alcohol face.

I don't wanna hear that!

All right, all right, children!

Mama, you sure the problem with Daddy

is not male menopause?

Yes, dear, I am sure.

Now, what's wrong with your Daddy

is something called male pride,

and it ain't gonna get no better

when I tell him what I gotta tell him.

What's that, Ma?

Well, we still need that money very badly,

and I have asked Edgar and Betty

to come over for dinner tonight.

Oh, Ma, Daddy's not gonna like that.

Yeah, that's like saying, "Everybody, in the water,"

when you know the shark is offshore.

Well, it's my doing, and it's up to me to tell him,

and I might as well get it over with right now.

[SIGHS]

Uh, Ma?

Yes, J.J.

Uh, we know that Dad's in a bad mood... Yes.

And what you're gonna tell him

is only gonna add fuel to the fire,

so I feel, as the eldest child in the family,

it is my job to help you out

of this delicate situation.

Ma...

Yes, honey.

Good luck!

J.J., go away.

Is your headache any better, honey?

Nope.

Can you I get you a cold compress for your head?

Nope.

How about a nice hot cup of tea with lemon?

Nope.

Is that all you've got to say, "Nope"?

Yup.

James...

Huh?

I got something to tell you.

Yeah?

You gonna like dinner tonight.

We've got pork chops.

Pork chops?

Florida, how we gonna afford pork chops

with the mess we in?

Well, um, they had a sale on them.

Yeah? What kind of sale?

Well, instead of being awfully expensive,

they were just very expensive.

And I wanted to have a nice dinner tonight

with, um, well...

with Betty and Edgar coming over.

Well, go ahead and have a nice--

Betty and Edgar!

How you gonna have them over here

without checking with me first?

Well, I thought it was a good idea.

Yeah, well, just forget it, Florida,

because I ain't asking your cousin for no more money.

Oh, James, I've already invited them over.

What can I do?

Give them each an extra pork chop,

because I ain't gonna be here.

Oh, James, that's not right.

James.

James, where are you going?

Out. Where out?

Out-out.

Well, when will you be back?

When I get back.

James--

Hey, Mama, Daddy left his keys!

It don't matter, Michael. He just broke the lock.

Bob Reeve was telling me the same thing, man.

I don't know, man.

I mean, I like Edgar and all that,

but how am I gonna ask the cat for $500?

Now, give me another beer, will you?

This is your third, James.

Two's usually it for you, man.

I don't know, man.

I mean, I need the money, but I got to keep my pride.

I gave up my pride

the day I bought season tickets to the Bears.

You think a city the size of Chicago

would have a decent football team.

Tell me something.

What do you have to do to get ahead in this world?

I'm tired of being a loser.

So are the Bears, and the White Sox,

and the Cubs.

This town is full of losers.

If we had a city lottery, everyone would lose.

Nigga, do I know you?

Let's keep the that way, huh?

See, Randy, the way I figure it is

if I could just borrow, say-- I got...

I got a riddle for you.

What has two eyes, two legs, and no arms?

Every quarterback the Bears every had.

[LAUGHS]

Get it?

Listen, man, I'm gonna hate myself

whether I borrow the money or not.

Randy, tell me something.

I mean, if you were in my shoes,

would you ask them for the money?

Hey... Ever seen the White Sox play baseball?

No!

Neither have I,

and I went to every home game this season!

I know what I'm gonna do.

I am tired of crawling to people for money.

Every time I ask Edgar for a dime,

he just lays that smile on me.

I'm gonna wipe that smile off his face,

because I'm gonna tell him

exactly what he can do with his money.

Man, I'm glad he split. What a pest!

I wish I knew where your father went.

Oh, Mama, don't worry.

Daddy will be back before dinner.

Oh, I hope you're right, honey,

but there isn't much time.

Well, if he's not back on time,

I can always hit on Edgar for the money.

You?

That's right, and I know exactly how to handle it,

with diplomacy and finesse.

I got the perfect plan all worked out.

It's logical, rational, and, above all, low-key.

What's your plan, J.J.?

Get him bombed!

Yeah, I'll stick so much drink down Edgar,

he'll have to sleep on a wine rack.

J.J., don't be silly,

you know cousin Edgar always helps us out

whenever we needed it.

[KNOCKING]

Oh, my goodness,

I bet that's Edgar and Betty now.

Florida!

Oh, Betty, hello.

Hey, cuz!

Oh, cousin Edgar.

Thelma!

Oh, honey, hi.

Michael, look at you. Hi, son. How are you?

Hey, cousin Edgar! Have some wine here.

J.J.

Now, you know Edgar doesn't drink.

Oh, come on, Florida, there's nothing wrong

with a little nip on a special occasion.

[LAUGHS]

Let me freshen that up for you, cousin Edgar.

Thelma, I swear you get prettier

every time I see you.

Thank you.

And, Michael!

Hi, cousin Betty.

Well, don't I get a kiss, young man?

Oh, yeah.

That's better.

You're so big!

Yeah. Oh!

EDGAR: J.J.,

this is very good wine.

Aw, nothing but the best for you, cousin Edgar,

from our private French stock.

We call it "Chateau Muscatel".

Oh, no, no, no, hold it now.

I've only had a sip out of this.

Oh, this is not the sipping kind of wine, though,

cousin Edgar.

You chug it!

That's enough, J.J.

Now, why don't we all just sit down--

Hey, Florida, now, where's James?

Oh, he had to go--

Yeah, he went to--

He'll be right back.

I hope so.

I haven't seen you all in so long.

He'll be back. He said he would...

Well, he said it wouldn't take him

any longer than, um--

Oh, my God, what am I doing?

You're family.

I don't have to make up a story for you.

Now, the truth is,

we're having some bad money problems,

and I suggested that we get the money from you.

But you know James.

He didn't think we should borrow from you again,

so we had a fight, and...

I don't know where he went.

Florida, you know we're always happy to help out,

but we have to think of James too,

and if he doesn't want the money from us,

well, maybe that's best.

Well, I mean, a man's pride is important.

So are 12 cavities.

We shouldn't offer him money if he doesn't want us to.

No, as a matter of fact,

I don't think we should talk about money at all tonight.

Have another glass of wine, cousin Edgar.

J.J..

I don't mind if I do, son.

Look, Florida,

you've been right out front with us.

I think it's time to be right out front with you.

Betty, please, not now.

I don't see any harm in it, Edgar.

We'd love to give you the money, Florida,

but we just don't have it to give right now.

Edgar lost his job.

He hasn't worked in over three months now.

Three months?

[CLEARS THROAT]

Well, the bar is now closed.

Edgar, I am sorry to hear that.

You have 20 years with that company.

Oh, that just isn't fair.

I bet the only reason why they fired you

is because you're black.

Well, if they did, Michael,

they fired six other guys because they're white.

Now, Betty, can we drop it?

Edgar, Betty...

I didn't mean to add to your problems

by asking for the loan.

We'll manage.

So why don't we just sit down

and have a nice, pleasant visit--

James, I'm so glad you're here.

Oh, James! Hey, buddy.

How you doing? Yeah, yeah.

Look here, Edgar,

I've been doing a lot of thinking.

I may be in a $500 hole,

but I ain't borrowing one more dime from you.

James, Edgar doesn't have--

Edgar ain't got the right to come in here

and make me think I can't afford

to provide for my family.

James, will you please listen to me?

Edgar, I don't care how much money you got,

I ain't borrowing no more from you.

James, he's broke.

Say what?

Edgar lost his job. Yeah, Dad,

you yelling at the goose that's run out of golden eggs.

Well, ain't that a blip?

Cousin Edgar has been out of work

for three months, Daddy.

Huh.

And the politicians say they there ain't no depression.

That's because they the only ones working.

Well, one good thing, Edgar,

you came to the depression experts.

We was having a depression when things was good.

Oh, look, you don't understand,

we're not that-- Betty.

Yeah, we used every trick in the world to get by.

You all ought to see the budget

Florida has to feed us on.

It ain't enough to make a flea let out his belt.

But what I'm trying to tell you

is that Edgar doesn't--

Now, I told you to drop it.

Yeah, Mama, you so good at saving money,

I bet you can teach President Ford

how to balance the country's budget.

That's right, Michael,

I'm gonna tell the president to do the same thing I do,

make sacrifices, watch your pennies,

and buy neck bones.

Yeah, we do what we have to to get by.

Well, thanks for the pep talk, everybody,

but we're really not that bad off.

Oh, Betty, for God's sakes. Please.

Honey, I don't know why you're so worried.

We're doing fine.

Edgar has been out on interviews

and has a lot of prospects for jobs.

They value a man with his experience.

Why, it's just a matter of picking the best offer.

Well, well, well!

Then the bar is now open again.

It stands to reason a man like Edgar

shouldn't be out of work too long.

Oh, he won't have any problem,

no problem at all.

Right, dear?

Wrong, dear, dead wrong.

I don't understand.

I didn't want to talk about it,

but if you want me to tell it to you in front of the family

in front of the whole world, all right.

I don't have any prospects.

But you told me at those interviews, they--

They, they... Yeah, well,

they all have the same line.

"We're sorry, Mr. Edwards,

"there's nothing for you today,

nothing around."

If there is anything around,

you think they're gonna call me?

A man of my age,

with all those kids fresh out of college

just begging for jobs, working at half my price.

Honey, I didn't know--

No, no, no, you wanted to hear it.

Why don't you just sit quiet and hear it all.

When I tell them I'll work for less,

they run and hide behind the big, fat desk.

They think I'm too ready to collect a pension,

so now I'm down to, maybe, one interview a week.

But you get dressed

and leave the house every day.

What do you do with yourself?

Hah, what do I do with myself?

I go to a movie, and I watch it five times.

You know what it's like

walking out of a theater 4:30 in the afternoon,

knowing you should have been at work?

You hold your coat collar up

and pray that you don't meet anybody you know.

Edgar, I mean, a man with your education--

Yeah, sure.

I can't even get a job at a car wash.

I'm too educated for a good hot wax.

Honey, I can get a job.

I know I can.

Sure, you can.

Then maybe we can pay the gas bill,

the electric bill...

We have got a mortgage, a car, a kid in college.

We're just in too deep. I can't make it.

What's happening to me now is there's no tomorrow.

Florida I'm sorry, I got no stomach for supper.

Some other time.

[CRYING]

I'm sorry, Florida.

I'm sorry, James.

We'll manage. I know, I know, I know.

I know you will.

It'll be all right.

Oh, Florida.

Ma, what do you think will happen to them?

Oh, Edgar is having a little trouble now,

but I'm sure he'll bounce back.

You know something, Florida.

I been thinking about what I said earlier.

You know, about not having moved an inch in 20 years...

Yeah, James.

You know we may have been living in the basement all our lives,

and Edgar may have been living in the penthouse,

but it's sure a shorter drop from the basement.

Yeah.

You know, baby, just for once in my life,

I'd like to get up on top of that penthouse.

I mean, maybe I'd fall and maybe I wouldn't,

but it sure would be nice

to be up there for a while just... teetering.

Good morning, J.J.

Good morning, Ma.

Did you brush your teeth real good this morning?

Sure did.

And have you been brushing them every night

before you go to bed?

Sure thing!

You're not eating any sweets?

No, Ma, I'm really watching it.

What picture are you painting today?

Something I'm gonna frame and hang up.

* Mm, mm *

* Just lookin' Out of the window *

* Watching the asphalt grow *

* Thinkin' how It all looks hand-me-down *

* Good times Good times *

* Keepin' your head Above water *

* Makin' a wave When you can *

* Temporary layoffs Good times *

ANNOUNCER: Good Times is recorded on tape

before a live audience.

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em? *

* Good times **