All language subtitles for G.T.S02E19.The.Dinner.Party.540p.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-squalor_track3_[eng]

* Good times
Any time you meet a payment *

* Good times
Any time you need a friend *

* Good times *

* Any time you're
Out from under *

* Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled *

* Keepin' your head
Above water *

* Makin' a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs
Good times *

* Easy credit rip-offs
Good times *

* Scratchin' and survivin'
Good times *

* Hangin' in a chow line
Good times *

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good times **

Has anybody seen
my pincushion?

Oh yeah,
I hope you don't mind, Ma,

I used it as part
of a still life

of a bowl of fruit
I was painting.

J.J., you used my pincushion
in a bowl of fruit?

Yeah, Ma, that's true
ghetto artistry,

you use what you've got.

I used your pincushion
as the apple,

Dad's socks as the avocado,

Michael's basketball
as the pumpkin

and Thelma's face
as the lemon.

Just bend a little and you could
throw your body in as a banana.

You got some nerve,
you Chiquita banana!

All right now, will you two
knock it off, please?

I'm trying to figure
out these bills.

What kind of shape we in
financially this month, James?

Well, we ain't in a position to
challenge in the Rockefellers,

but we ain't headed
for the poorhouse either, baby.

For once we are in the black.

What do you mean for once?

Everything paid for, James?

Everything, baby: Rent,
utilities and luxuries.

Daddy, you forgot
to mention food.

These days that
comes under luxuries.

Family, say hello
to George Washington 35 times.

Hello, George.
Hello, George.

You know I never realized how
handsome old George is.

Ma, it's his wooden teeth,
he uses Crest

and he has 24 percent
fewer termites.

You know baby it sure seems
strange having money left over

at the end of the month.

You children are responsible
for that, you know?

Your part-time jobs helped
to put us ahead.

That's never happened
to this family before.

What are we going to do
with the extra $35 James?

I don't know, whatever we do
we better spend it today,

because tomorrow it ain't going
to be worth but $22.50.

Hey baby, why don't
you take the money

and buy something for yourself--
something silly, you deserve it.

Hey, I just had a better thought
of what to do with that money.

Huh?

I'd like for Thelma
to take

singing lessons
with Gertie Vincent.

You really mean it?

Aw, Ma, now Dad said do
something silly, not insane.

Now J.J.,

your sister has
a very pretty voice

and I think she ought
to have a chance to develop it.

Ma, I can really
have voice lessons?

I think so, right James?

Yeah baby, matter of fact,

you can call Gertie right now
and make the arrangements.

Oh, I will.

Oh, thank you, Daddy.

Oh, you're welcome, baby girl.

Singing, that's...

Give me the basketball,

I'm going outside
to shoot some, man.

Okay, make sure nobody
rips it off,

my next painting is going
to be a cantaloupe.

Okay.

Thanks, later everybody.

All right,

you know if we have a surplus
after Thelma's singing lessons,

why don't we invest it in
something smart

like an earplug factory?

There's going to be
a big demand around here.

I guess she ain't home.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

I'll get it, Ma.
Okay, sweetheart.

And the same to you,
jive turkey!

Hi, Mrs. Vincent.

Hi, Thelma.
That old meathead janitor--

I put a quarter in the washing
machine this morning,

it didn't work
and I started some kicking.

When I put a quarter in
and it don't work,

I kick that machine myself.

I didn't kick the machine,
I kicked the janitor.

Boy, Gertie,
you are something else.

Hey, I was just
calling you!

Well, good then I saved
you a toll call.

Gertie, you live right upstairs,
you ain't no toll call.

Oh yes, I am.

You know what they say
about old Gertie Vincent:

She is far out.

Oh, Gertie, I just love
your sense of humor.

You've got to have
a sense of humor at my age.

The way I see it,
you come into this world,

the first thing that happens
is you get a slap on your behind

from your doctor, and the slaps,
punches and kicks

don't stop until
they put you in a pine box.

So I'm gonna laugh all
I can before I'm boxed.

I hope I get
a nice-looking box boy.

That's a beautiful philosophy,
Mrs. Vincent.

That's Ms. Vincent,
Thelma, Ms. Vincent.

I'm returning your cake pan.

Okay Gertie.

Florida, that chocolate cake
was out of sight.

Why thank you.

Reminded me of my late husband--

Sweet, black and satisfying.

I'm prattling on so,
I forgot to ask you, Florida,

what were you calling me about?

We were thinking
about asking you

to give Thelma
voice lessons.

Oh, I don't think that's going
to be possible.

Good move, Gertie,

you just saved yourself
from a terminal earache.

One more crack out of you about
your sister singing

and you gonna have
a terminal butt ache.

Sit down!

Gertie, we're ready
to pay money.

I know James, and I know
that Thelma has a lovely voice,

but I'm giving up teaching.

No more lessons to anyone,
I'm retiring.

Retiring? You, Gertie?

I thought you lived
for your singing.

I do and I enjoy it,

but it's getting to be
so much of a hassle.

But what will you do
if you retire?

Oh, lots of things like racing
muggers to the bus.

Sitting in the park
with my women friends

watching our sup hose wrinkle.

Well, I'll see you all.

Oh, Thelma, I'm sorry,

I would have loved
to work with you.

Thanks again
for the cake Florida.

Oh, you're welcome, Gertie.

Bye, Ms. Vincent.

Well, now that
we've all regained our senses,

why don't we do something smart
with this surplus money

like send me
to art school in Paris.

Junior, the only way we could
send you to Paris for $35

would be to mail you there.

You won't have any trouble
slipping him through the slot.

Of course,
he'll probably wind up

in the deadhead
letter office.

You've got some nerve talking
about deadhead...

That's enough!

Hmph.

You know I just can't get over

Gertie deciding all
of the sudden to retire.

An active woman like that?

Yeah, she always struck me
as being like Willona's mouth--

Running all the time.

She said she loved teaching
and being around young people.

Said it kept her young.

Well, she's 67 years old,
she's entitled to retire.

It's strange though,
she's such a lively old lady.

Yeah, but Thelma,
what's she going to retire to?

Maybe she found herself
a lively old man.

Hi, y'all.

Hi, Willona.

I just came by to show you
the new clothes at the boutique.

They sell those?

Every chance we get.

It looks like something
from Goodwill has been rejected

by the Salvation Army.

Well, the boutique is
keeping up with the times.

This is the latest line
of fashion

called the recession rags.

Is madam going
to the unemployment office

this morning?

Well if so, she should wear
these new blue jeans

with the ragged cuffs,
patches there and patches there.

After five at the bread line
we suggest the same attire,

but with this funky blouse--
Hey!

Willona, how much
is that blouse?

Almost as much as
a loaf of bread: $25.

Well, I ain't rich enough
to look that poor.

I'm a hit!

Well that concludes
the fashion show,

now on for the gossip
of the day.

Here it comes,
the Rona Barrett of the projects

with the 5:00 news.

We got some 5:00 news
for you, Willona.

What?

Gertie Vincent just left here,

and would you believe it,
she is retiring.

She ain't giving
singing lessons no more.

That's just the headlines--
I got the inside story.

Didn't you hear about the
trouble she's having?

Come on over here.

I've got all of the information
from a friend down

at the Social Security office.

What kind of trouble?

She gets $200
a month Social Security,

which is not enough
to live on.

That's why she's been
giving the singing lessons,

to get a little extra money.

But do you know that every
extra two dollars she makes

giving a singing lesson,

they take away a dollar
from her Social Security check?

What kind of a deal is that?

It's a new dance they invented

called the Washington,
D.C. Boogie.

See, every time you take two
steps ahead they drag you back.

So that's why Gertie
decided to retire--

it just doesn't pay her to give
singing lessons anymore.

You know it. Flo, they got her
stuck right in the middle.

People work hard all their lives
to qualify for Social Security,

and then when they get it,

it ain't enough to make them
feel secure,

and it sure ain't enough
to make them get social on.

Well, it just goes to show you,

no matter how bad
off you think you are,

there's somebody hurting worse.

I just got an extra nickel,
Mrs. Vincent gave it to me

for carrying down her garbage.

Oh, Michael, you shouldn't have
taken money from Ms. Vincent,

that poor woman don't know where
her next meal is coming from.

If things are that bad, Mama,
why'd she buy a dog?

Michael, Ms. Vincent
ain't got no dog.

Then how come her garbage was
loaded with empty dog food cans?

Gertie's garbage loaded
with empty dog food cans?

Yeah, Mama.

Oh, no.

It's hard to believe.

That means that Gertie
is down to eating pet food.

Oh, that's awful.

It's a crying shame.

It sure is.

It can't be that bad.

Lassie ain't never been sick
a day in her life.

I don't know, folks,
I don't know what I'm saying.

I mean I'm so shook up.

I know what J.J. means,

I feel it down
in the pit of my stomach.

Oh James, we've just got to do
something for that poor woman.

What about a protest?

That's a great idea, Michael,
but who do we picket?

How about the American
Kennel Club?

Why don't you think before you
open your mouth, J.J.?

Well, I'm going home before
I burst out crying.

James, you and Flo come up with
any ideas to help Gertie,

count me in, okay?

All right.

I just hope this doesn't happen
to me when I'm 65.

What am I worried about,
that's at least 40 years off!

It's a sin that in the
richest country in the world

anyone has
to be eating pet food.

Well, the least we can do

is invite her over
to dinner tonight.

Yeah.

Feeding one more person

sure ain't going to send none
of us to bed hungry.

That's right.

Wow, Ma, that's a pretty big
chicken you're cooking.

We're having chicken
for dinner?

Then we'll have no problem
having one more guest,

because Ma is the number one
chicken mathematician

in the whole ghetto.

Make a chicken last
for three days.

Hold on now, J.J.,

I'm pretty good at making meals
go a long ways,

but three days, well now that's
kind of stretching things.

Oh, Ma, it's just that you
haven't kept track

of your mathematical wizardry.

Day number one you slosh
the bird around

in some boiling hot water,
we got chicken soup.

Day number two is the teaser,

you take the wings,
the thigh and the neck

and you got something so yummy
it tickles the tummy.

Day number three

you've got the legs,
the thigh and the breast

and you got something so light
we call it Chicken Dy-no-mite!

Well, your mama's going to have
to be some kind of magician

to get Gertie over here
for dinner.

How so baby? Just tell her
we're having chicken

and she'll come on over here.

We done had her over here
for dinner before.

Yeah, once or twice a month,
but you got to remember,

we just had her over
to dinner day before yesterday.

Now if we invite her
back again so soon

she's bound to get suspicious,
she's a proud woman.

Yeah I know that, but
we just gotta figure out

some way to have her over here
for dinner, that's all.

Yeah.

Thelma, you and J.J.
set the table.

Okay, Ma, you want me to set
a place for Mrs. Vincent too?

Of course, Thelma.

Will you move?

What's all this violence?

Florida, have you figured out
some way to get her over here?

I don't know.

Hey, maybe we can convince her
it's a special occasion,

a reason to celebrate.

Why can't you just say,
"Mrs. Vincent,

we heard you're having
a hard time

and we'd like to share
our chicken with you."

That would be telling
her the truth.

That's right, Michael,

but I'm not so sure it's quite
the diplomatic thing to do.

Diplomatic?

Yeah, son, that's a word
that's used mostly

by people in government.

See, when they want you
to vote for something,

but they know if they was to
tell you directly

what it is they want,
you wouldn't vote for it.

So they tell you
something else

and then you end
up voting for it.

That's diplomacy.
That's lying.

That's the same thing.

Mama, are you going
to use diplomacy

to get Mrs. Vincent
over here to eat?

Well, Michael, there's only one
way to act

and that's deal straight
from the shoulder.

That's Ma,
tell it like it is.

There's no sense in beating
around the bush.

I'll just call her up and say--

Hello, Gertie? Florida.

Look, we're having
a little celebration,

it's J.J.'s birthday.

Yes, and we'd like for you
to come over to dinner tonight.

Oh, we really would like
for you to come.

Good,
then come right over,

we're just getting
ready to sit down.

Straight from the shoulder,
huh, baby?

So I'm a lousy diplomat.

Naw, baby, you're great.

I tell you, I'd rather
have you doing the cooking

than Henry Kissinger.

Oh, thanks, honey.

Hey.

You wouldn't do that
to Henry Kissinger.

Henry ain't got
what you got.

Hey, that beats
pet food any day.

You know, Ma,
I read somewhere

that almost one-third
of the dog and cat food

produced is being eaten
by people.

Well the way things
are now, honey, I believe it.

[KNOCKING]

Oh, that's Gertie.

MICHAEL:
I'll get it.

Now listen, children,

I want you all to behave as
normal as you ever do.

Hi, Mrs. Vincent.

Hey, Gertie, come right on in,
have a seat,

we just getting ready
to sit down and eat.

Oh, thank you James, it's so
nice of you all to have me over.

Oh, Gertie, you didn't need
to bring dessert,

we got a full meal.

Oh, this is not dessert,
this is the main course.

I'm a pretty good cook,
you know,

and this is my specialty,
meatloaf.

Meatloaf?

Oh, yes I'm so proud
of what I do with it.

You know folks eat my meatloaf
and leave the table raving.

Maybe they got hydrophobia.

Oh, Gertie,
that was awfully sweet of you,

but I've already made chicken.

Now, Florida, you listen,

you've had me over
as a guest dozens of times.

Please allow me
to do something in return.

No, no, no, you're our guest.

I'm an old woman
and a stubborn one,

if you don't allow my meatloaf
to be the main course,

I won't stay.

Bye.

Gertie, chicken and meatloaf,
that's too much.

Well, we'll just remove
the chicken

and my meatloaf will be just
perfect for J.J.'s birthday.

I'm gonna still be chicken
about eating that meatloaf.

Instead of chasing foxes
I'm gonna be chasing cats.

And here we are.

Well sit down everybody,
sit down.

Have a seat, Gertie.
Thank you James.

Oh, Florida everything
looks so lovely.

Thank you.
Almost everything.

Now, James,
as head of the family

you get the first piece.

Thank you, Gertie.

Junior, since you
the birthday boy,

you get first crack at it.

Ladies first! Thelma.

Michael, you need
this to grow on.

Mamas before kids.

Husbands before wives.

James, you're acting

almost as though you didn't
want to eat my meatloaf.

That ain't no act,
Gertie.

I'm happy to eat
your meatloaf, but...

Hi, am I intruding?

Oh, no, Willona.

You're just in time,
come on in.

Come on in, we just getting
ready to eat.

Come on Willona,
tell us all of the gossip.

Yeah, everything.
Yeah, for a couple of hours.

How you doing Gertie?

Hi, Willona.

What about dinner?

Well, that's what
I came over here for.

You did?

I burned my own dinner so bad

that my stove looks
like a towering inferno.

So I figured I'd come over
here and take a chance.

Well, this is the right place
to take a chance.

Where do I sit?

ALL:
Here!

Well, come on, now there's
no need for anybody

to change their seat,

there's plenty
of meatloaf for all of us.

Michael, baby,
get yourself a chair.

Nuh-uh, Mama,
I'm doing fine right here.

Mm-mm, do I love
Florida's meatloaf.

This is not Florida's
meatloaf tonight.

Oh?

I brought it down
and made it myself.

Well, I've had second thoughts
about dinner.

You know it's a sin to waste
food even though it is burned.

Besides, the charcoal is good
for my teeth, keep them white.

Boneappetite, y'all.

James, let's get started.

Right, but you know me,
you know,

we ain't said grace yet,

and I wouldn't think of
taking a mouthful of food

without saying grace, Gertie.

But Dad, you never say grace,
not you.

I mean that--

You are the religious leader
of this house, you are.

J.J., why don't
you say grace?

And don't be too long
about it, J.J.,

when my meatloaf gets cold,
it loses some of its bite.

The Lord is my German
Shepherd and...

So that's what's
been going on?

Do you think that I would give
my friends pet food?

Gertie if you enjoy it
there's no reason why...

Come on everybody
let's eat the...meatloaf.

Florida, that is ground round.

What kind of a person
do you think I am?

Gertie, we heard that you...

Because I couldn't
afford better,

that sometimes I eat pet food?

Well, I do.

But that doesn't mean
that I would try

to fool my friends with it.

That is real meatloaf,
believe me.

I should have
known better.

I'm sorry,
can you forgive us?

Of course.

Well, in that case, let me quote
the late great Rin Tin Tin,

"Let's eat!"

You know, maybe there's a lesson
in all of this for me too.

You people have been so busy
trying to help me,

and I haven't done a thing
to try to help myself.

Well, now I'm going to.

Well what you
gonna do, Gertie?

I'm gonna stop
feeling sorry for myself

because I've been caught between
a rock and a hard place.

FLORIDA:
All right.

I have spent years earning my
Social Security, and I want it.

And I'm not going to say
that this old bag of bones

is going to be retired.

And Thelma, if you still want
them lessons, I'm available.

I do, but what about
your Social Security?

I'm gonna fight for it.

Good.

There are a lot of old folks
around in the same boat I'm in.

The only trouble is
they don't get together,

they stay in their
private miseries.

Well, I'm gonna
get them together.

Amen!
Good for you, Gertie.

And together we count
for a lot of votes.

We've not only got black power,
we've got Medicare power.

Hey, now that's
the old Gertie I know talking.

Yeah!

Come on now,
let's enjoy this meal.

And if you want any more
meatloaf, just howl.

Oooww!

* Just lookin' out
Of the window *

* Just lookin' out
Of the window *

* Watching the asphalt grow *

* Thinkin' how
It all looks hand-me-down *

* Good times
Good times *

* Keepin' your head
Above water *

* Makin' a wave
When you can *

* Temporary layoffs
Good times *

ANNOUNCER:
Good Times is recorded
on tape

before a live audience.

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good times **