All language subtitles for G.T.S02E02.J.J.Becomes.a.Man.Part.1.540p.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-squalor_track3_[eng]

* Good times
Any time you meet a payment *

* Good times
Any time you need a friend *

* Good times
Any time you're out from under *

* Not gettin' hassled
Not gettin' hustled *

* Keepin' your head
Above water *

* Makin' a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs
Good times *

* Easy credit ripoffs
Good times *

* Scratchin' and survivin'
Good times *

* Hangin' in a chow line
Good times *

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good times **

[HUMMING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"]

Ooh, baby,
that's a big cake.

It's got to be big
to hold 18 candles.

Yeah, I can't believe it--
Junior, 18.

Boy, it seemed
like just yesterday,

I was looking at him through
the maternity ward window,

making faces at him, huh?

And he was making faces
right back.

Yeah, I remember
the first time

I saw him.

The doctor was holding him

after he took him from me...

Mm-hmm.
And there was J.J.,

upside down, backside out,

squirming all over the place
and yelling a mile a minute.

Yeah, and he's been
that way for 18 years.

He was a beautiful baby.

Mm-hmm.

I still remember
how nervous you got,

first-born and all.

What you talking
about, Florida?

I was cool.

Oh, sure,
you were real cool.

When we checked out
of that hospital,

you paid the bill,
gave the nurse a cigar,

and picked up a white baby.

Come on, Florida.

Oh, I was just teasing.

Hey, this ain't
going to be easy.

What's that, baby?

Putting
all this lettering

on this cake
that J.J. wanted.

He wrote down exactly
what he wanted--

"Happy Birthday
and many happy returns

to our beloved
first-born son, J.J."

Well, that's nice.

"Who has given us

"nothing but joy
and pleasure

"for the last
18 years...

Oh, that's
a lot of words.

"And who will continue
to give us the same joy

"and pleasure

"during the years to come...

Well, Florida, how you
going to get all that--

I ain't finished yet.

"And who will be our pride
and joy in our old age..."

Baby, no way in the world
you're going to get that--

Wait.

"Signed,

Your grateful parents,
mom and dad."

You're going to have
to add one more line--

"To be continued
on the next cake."

Hi, y'all.

Hey, Willona.
How you doing?

How's it going?

Girl, I had a rough time
figuring out what to get J.J.

I asked myself, "What would
an 18-year-old boy want?"

Well...

I know, but it's pretty hard
to giftwrap an 18-year-old girl.

What did you get him?

I got him
this groovy shirt.

Had it made up special
by a custom tailor.

A custom tailor?

James, there ain't
too many ready-made shirts

going to fit
your son's beautiful body,

so I said to the tailor,
"Think of a telephone pole,

"add extra-long sleeves,

and you've got it."

Yeah.
Junior always was a problem.

We used to have to put a net
under his high chair,

because he kept
slipping through.

Oh, Willona, did you
stop at the store

and pick up the present
we got for J.J.?

Oh, honey, I forgot,
but don't worry,

I've got to go pick up
J.J.'s shirt right now,

and I'll stop by
and get it.

Mm, that's good.

You're sure you don't mind
keeping it at your place?

No trouble at all.

It's just that we want it to be
a real surprise for J.J.

He's been nosing around

trying to find out
what everybody's giving him.

Yeah, he's as nosy
as I am.

Nobody is, Willona.

You are the champ.

Later for you, James.

Sure is a pretty cake.

Wait till you see it
with the 18 candles.

18...

What a great age.

I had that many candles
on my cake when I was 14.

When you were 14?

Mm-hmm, when I was 14,
I wanted to be 18,

and when I was 18,
I wanted to be 25,

and when I was 25,

I decided to blow out
the candles,

freeze the cake,
and stop the clock.

I'll see you all at dinner.

Catch you later.

Take it easy now.

Boy, baby, I can't wait to see
the expression on Junior's face

when he sees them
presents we got him.

Ooh, he's going
to paint up a storm

when he sees
those new paints

and brushes.

And he's going to really flip

over that genuine leather case
with his own initials on it.

$75.

You know, that's real big time.

You don't think
we went overboard, do you?

Mm-hmm.

What the hell, baby?

I mean, it's our son's big day.
He's going to be 18.

I want to give him
something better

than I got
when I turned 18.

What was that?
A draft notice.

James, you are
a great father.

Well, why do you say it
so surprised, baby?

You knew the night you married
me you had a great husband.

Well, how did we do it,
Florida?

What did it take to
get Junior to be 18?

Guts.

Hey, Ma, I got J.J.
the bacon-flavored potato chips,

but I didn't bother to look for
the other crazy thing he wanted.

What was that, Thelma?

A soul food pizza--

Tomato and cheese,

sprinkled with chitlins
and black-eyed peas.

See, I told you.

That boy is still upside down
and backside out.

It's a wonder he didn't ask
for fatback fortune cookies.

He did.

That's my brother.

Mama, can you make
a bow on this?

I can't do it.

Sure, honey.

Hey, Michael,
what did you get Junior?

A book.

On black history, right?

No, on white history.

You bought a book
on white history?

Yeah, it's the story
of how for the last 300 years,

the whites have been
holding down the Blacks.

For a minute there,

I thought
the militant midget

had jumped
to the other league.

Never.

I won't rest
until our people

have everything
the whites have.

We've already got it--

unemployment, inflation,
taxation, aggravation.

You're right, baby.

When it comes to misery,

they sure gave us
equal rights.

Amen.

Here I am...

18 today,

happy, bright, narrow man,
and pure dy-no-mite.

It's a good thing
you're 18.

Now you can be
a fool legally.

Since today
is such a joyous occasion,

I'll ignore that insult
that slipped through

your five-and-dime
lipstick.

Dear mother,

I know how happy you are
to see your glorious son

turn into
magnificent manhood...

And dear father,

I can remember
the first time we met...

Peering at me through
the maternity-ward window,

making faces.

Well, family,
are y'all ready for this?

Are y'all ready
for the big news,

the big announcement?

I got myself a job.

That's not news.
That's a miracle.

J.J.,

you're not thinking about
dropping out of school?

Yeah, because
you can forget that.

Coming of age may have
gone to your head,

but it ain't going
to keep my strap

from getting
to your butt.

No, Dad, it's just a few hours
after school.

What kind of job
is it, J.J.?

Big, Michael,

really, really big.

I'll be ringing doorbells
all over Chicago.

Don't tell me
you became an Avon lady.

No, Ma.

You're looking
at the newest

personal
representative

of the instant,

speedy, rapid-fire
delivery service.

J.J., take out
the yeast,

and just say
you're a messenger boy.

That shows how
much you know

about big business,
little sister.

I'll have you know
they put me

in their elite
courier division.

I'll be carrying
valuable things

like stocks, bonds,
and get-well cards.

Hey, it sounds good.
When do you get started?

As soon as I get bonded,
you know, to make sure

I'm clean
and everything like that,

but I ain't worried,
because I'm a model citizen.

Okay, Speedy,
so how much you getting paid?

The man says
this is a wonderful opportunity.

Salary is not important.

Mm-hmm.
Oh, yeah.

That's what they've been telling
me all my life,

and they prove it
by what they pay me.

Mm-hmm.
Well, if you'll excuse me,

I've got to get ready
for my birthday dinner.

Okay, son.

Oh, Mom?

Mm-hmm?

Did you get
all those special things

I wanted for my dinner?

J.J., I'm so sorry,

but soul food pizza
is not in season

this time of the year.

That's all right, Ma,

as long as you got
my main dish--

turkey stuffed
with pork chops,

basted in Kool-Aid.

Ma, is he really your son,

or is someone trying
to punish us?

I heard that.

Good.

Want to hear it again?

Willona, did you get
the package put away?

Is something wrong?

I don't know
how to tell you this.

Tell us what?
I didn't get the present.

James,
they turned down your credit.

Oh, you've got
to be jiving.

I don't think she is.

There's got to be
some mistake.

I mean, we've been shopping
at Wilton's department store

for years, baby.

They've got computers now
that make all the decisions,

and according to the computer,
your credit is zero.

Why, Daddy?

Ah, who knows,
baby girl.

Ain't no telling.

Could have been something
that happened years ago.

I mean, I missed
a payment one month,

but I made up for it
the next month.

It don't matter, James.

They got it
on the computer.

Computer?

Now, what does a computer know
about how honest a man is?

And what does a computer know
about what a father's feeling

when he wants to buy
something special for his son?

Honey, we can still get him
some little something.

Babe, I don't want to get him
a little something.

I mean, he's 18 today.

I want to get him
something to remember.

Florida, I'm telling you, baby,
it hurts deep down in here.

I'm a man and a father.
I ain't no number.

I'm going down to that store

and tell them
what the hell they can do

with them
jive turkey computers.

Hey!

Could y'all save
some of that happy noise

for my birthday party?

Thank you.

James, it isn't
going to do you any good

to let it eat you up.

But, Florida,
it just ain't right.

Now, I've been
an honest man all my life.

Now I got some damn computer
bad-mouthing me.

Well, if it was a man,
I'd bust it in two,

but what you supposed
to do with a computer?

Blow its fuse?

Don't blow yours.

Look, James, you can always buy
the art supplies

from another store.

We'll tell J.J.
there was a slight mix-up,

and it'll be a day late.

Yeah, but, Florida,

you don't understand
how these things work.

You know what they told me
down at the store?

They said that this computer
feeds information

to all other computers
all over the country.

Right now I couldn't get credit
in an Eskimo trading post

on a used igloo.

Damn.

You plan something big
for your son,

and now it's spoiled.

Well, don't spoil it worse.

I had a couple
of dollars,

and I sent Thelma
to buy him a sweater.

A sweater.

Boy, that's a hell of a comedown
from $75 worth of art supplies

and your own
special carrying case.

I know a sweater
ain't much,

but it's something.

But, baby, Junior was
expecting something big.

How do you know?

Because he said to me
the other day,

"Dad, I'm expecting
something big."

Oh, honey, let's make
the best of it.

We'll have a nice dinner,

we'll be pleasant

and act as if
there's nothing wrong.

Baby, that's going to
take a lot of acting.

Oh, you can do it, James.

You can do anything.

* Happy Birthday to you *

* Happy Birthday to you *

* Happy Birthday, dear J.J.
Happy Birthday to you **

All right.

All right, speech,
J.J., speech.

Speech, man.

I'm so overwhelmed,
words fail me.

But I'll force myself!

Today is
the proudest moment of my life,

when I officially pass
from boyhood into adultery.

Now, that better be
a slip of the lip,

or I'm going to
knock you back

into boyhood again.

Just jiving,
just jiving,

but seriously, folks,

it's wonderful
to share this occasion

with all the people I love,

and I'd like to thank
you all in advance

for the wonderful
presents

I'm about to receive.

J.J., blow out
the candles.

Okay, Ma.

And don't forget to make a wish.

J.J., will you blow out
the candles?

Okay.

Oh, come on,

you can do better
than that.

Now, J.J.,
either you get a bigger chest,

or stop down at the gas station
for more air.

Just using
one lung, ma.

Well, use them both.

All right, all right.

Give me a plate.

Okay, honey,
you cut the first slice.

Okay, Ma.

Mm, looks good.

I'm telling you.

J.J.!

That looks
like a gigantic twinkie.

A gigantic something.

Look at that.
Stop it.

Hey, J.J., what did you wish?

I wished that I could be so rich

that I could sit back
in my Cadillac

and have a Big Mac...

With my chauffeur

spoonfeeding me
French-fried onion rings.

Well, if you don't get
some meat on them bones,

you can use an onion ring
for a life preserver.

Right on, Daddy.

Enough of
this merriment.

Let's get on
to the main event.

Bring on the presents!

Junior, you know
the thing about presents

is it ain't
how big they are,

but it's just
the thought behind it.

Yeah, the important thing
is that we care,

and we love you.

Yeah, I know
that, Mama.

Now, bring on
the presents.

Let's see
how much love I got.

Ooh, look at that.

Look at that.

Ooh, you've got
some love today.

Pretty.

That one's from me, J.J.,
and many happy returns.

Gee, Michael, what a surprise--

a book about the oppression
of brothers.

Hey, man. Who told you?

Remember? Me and you sleep
together,

and you're the little guy
who talks in his sleep.

So what?
You used to wet the bed.

Moving on.

Next, Thelma's wonderful cap.

How'd you know that?

Did a little
search-and-seizure

in your room
the other day.

All the colors
I wanted, too.

That's not the one
I bought you.

I know, I already
exchanged it.

Did you see that, Ma?

I saw it,
and now, moving on.

Boy, when the chicks
see this hat,

I'm going to have
wall-to-wall hickeys.

Stop it.

Now, a custom-made
shirt from Willona.

He's an ebony Kojak.

Now, that's class.

Ooh, Willona.

Conservative, but that's class.

Yeah, go for that.

Now for the biggie.

The pièce de résistance
from Mom and Dad,

what I've been waiting
for all this time,

just what
I always wanted...

A sweater.

That's pretty.

Real nice.

That's nice.

Threading
is a little extra, huh?

Where's
the art supplies?

Uh, Junior.

Where's them paints,
them brushes,

that leather carrying case
with my initials on it?

Come on, y'all,
stop jiving me now.

There's something
I want to tell you.

I want to know.

I've been looking for this.
Where's this at?

I can paint
anywhere I want to.

Don't keep me hanging.
Where is it, y'all?

There is no carrying case
and no art supplies.

You jiving.

The sweater is all we got.

Yeah, that's it, son.

I want to apologize, because we
wanted to get you

everything you wanted...

But we ran into a problem.

Yeah, I found out

after working my tail off
all my life that my word

and my name
don't mean nothing.

I don't understand,
Dad.

Well, they've got some computer
down at the store

that flashes the word
all over the world

that my credit ain't no good.

It just ain't right.

You're damn right
it ain't right!

Ain't none of us nothing

but a bunch of numbers
in them computers.

They pick up on you
on the day you're born

and just pass
the information around

like a plate of grits.

Dad, I don't care

what that stupid
computer says.

You have more character
and integrity than anybody.

Yeah.

Well, thanks, baby girl.
Thanks, Michael.

Son, all I want to say
is I'm sorry.

Sorry?

What y'all worried about?

Who needs a fancy
leather carrying case

with my initials on it anyway?

I'm a ghetto artist.

Oh, J.J., you really did
want it, though, didn't you?

No, Ma. Now, don't go
putting yourself down.

It was a groovy dinner.

There were a lot
of out-of-sight presents,

and I thank all y'all.

You mean that, son?

Of course I do.

Well, all right.

Now, if y'all excuse me,

I've got to go
pick up my date, Henrietta.

Date? But I thought
you were going

to stay home
with us tonight.

Oh, didn't I tell you?

Must have slipped my mind.

You know, now that I'm 18,
you've got to learn to share me

with the rest of the women
in the world.

Hey, thanks a lot again

for making my party
a groovy gig. Thank you.

Have a good time, honey.

See ya, J.J.

Well, that date
sure came up fast.

Well, baby, he's at that age
where he got that natural itch.

He just wants to do
a little scratching.

Right on.

Dad, do you think
J.J. was disappointed

about not getting
that present?

Oh, not too much, Thelma.

You know your brother.

Old Junior
will bounce back

just like
a rubber ball.

Yeah, when you're 18,
the world is your oyster,

and when you don't find
a pearl in it,

you just open another oyster.

Guess you're right.

Well, looks like
the party's over.

You want me to help you
with the dishes, honey?

No, thank you, Willona.
I think I can manage it.

I'm glad
you said that,

because I hate
washing dishes.

Besides, I've just got enough
time to get back to my pad

and look at
my favorite TV show,

The Waltons.

The Waltons
is your favorite show?

Yeah, it's going to be
a great show tonight.

It starts off

where they can't pay
the mortgage,

the horse dies,

the mule gets a migraine,
and the drugstore's closed,

and then it gets sad.

I'll see y'all later.

Ma, let me
help you clean up.

No, you've got
homework to do.

You'd better
get on it.

You too, Michael.

Okay, Ma.

Well, the birthday party

didn't turn out too bad
after all, did it, James?

No, baby, as a matter of fact,
it was a nice party.

Yeah, and you know
what I was thinking?

Hmm?

A couple of more birthdays,

and we'll be going
to his wedding.

That's something
I can't get ready for yet,

the idea
of Junior getting married.

Hmm. Boy, I can just see it.

All the people
packed in the church,

sitting there nice and quiet
and dignified.

Preacher's standing up,

getting ready
to give the sacred vows,

and here comes Junior,
strutting down the aisle...

Mr. Preacher, I does.

Oh, maybe by then,
he'll be more like you--

Real serious.

You know,

I still remember you
coming down the aisle--

all serious,

looking straight ahead,
taking small, careful steps.

I had to.

I borrowed them shoes
from my uncle,

and they were just about
to eat my corns up.

Oh, but you relaxed
at the wedding party, though.

Yes, Lord.

You remember
our first dance?

How could I forget it?

* It had to be you... *

Wasn't that it?
That's it, yes.

* It had to be you *

* I wandered around *

* Finally found *

* Somebody who *

BOTH:
* Could make me
Feel blue *

* Could make me feel true *

* I'd even feel glad *

* Just to feel sad
Thinking of you *

* Some others I've seen... *

[LAUGHING]

* With all your faults
I love you still *

* It had to be you *

[KNOCKING]

* Wonderful you *

* It had to be you *

Mm, have mercy.

* It had to be you *

* It had to be you *

* I wandered around *

* Finally found me
Somebody who... *

Oh, my God.

How can I tell
Ma and Dad?

[HUMMING "IT HAD TO BE YOU"]

Ma? Daddy?

Ma? Daddy?

Yes.
What's the matter, Thelma?

I have
some real bad news.

What?
What is it, child? What is it?

Monty just told me

he saw J.J. being taken away
in a police car.

A police car?
Oh, James.

They arrested him

for holding up
a liquor store.

What?

Oh, James.

Daddy!

Could J.J. have wanted
the art supplies that much?

Oh, God, no.

No, no, James, no.

No!

ANNOUNCER:
You have just seen part one
of "J.J. Gets Arrested."

Be sure to see the conclusion
next week.

Here are some scenes from
"J.J. Gets Arrested, Part Two."

You're a good kid.
I like you.

[GRUNTS]

Hundred prisoners in the jail

and I gotta be in a cell
with George Foreman.

Five hundred dollars.

Ain't no way in the world
we can get that kind of money.

Hey there.

I hear you all got caught
in the long green squeeze.

Man,
your troubles are over,

'cause plenty money is here.

This is your first rap. If you
admit you did it and cooperate,

the judge will go
a little easier on you.

You see,
we're here to help you.

Want a cigarette?

Yeah, thanks, man.

[COUGHS]

What's the matter?

I just remembered,
I don't smoke.

ANNOUNCER:
Be sure to see the conclusion

of "J.J. Gets Arrested"
next week.

[***]

[***]

* Mm-mm-mm *

* Just lookin'
Out of the window *

* Watching the asphalt grow *

* Thinkin' how
It all looks hand-me-down *

* Good times
Good times *

* Keepin' your head
Above water *

* Makin' a wave
When you can *

* Temporary layoffs
Good times *

ANNOUNCER:
Good Times is recorded
on tape

before a live audience.

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good times **