Original subtitles

ANNOUNCER: From Television City in Hollywood...

* Good Times *

* Anytime you meet a payment *

* Good Times *

* Anytime you meet a friend *

* Good Times *

* Anytime you're out from under *

* Not getting hassled Not getting hustled *

* Keeping your head above water *

* Making a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs *

* Good Times *

* Easy credit rip-offs *

* Good Times *

* Scratching and surviving *

* Good Times *

* Hanging in a chow line *

* Good Times *

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good Times *

JJ, Michael, it's time for school.

It's 7:00.

Come on. Let's go. Rise and shine, boys.

Mama, "boy" is a white racist word.

I don't believe it.

That child is even militant in his sleep.

Come on, move it, JJ.

This is your big day.

You're getting your report card today.

I can't get 'em to bed at night,

and I can't get them up in the morning.

All right, come on, come on.

Michael, up, up, up.

Aw, Mama.

All right, JJ.

I was just kissing The Supremes,

and I don't mean one at a time.

Well, let me give you some facts of life, honey.

If The Supremes really love you, they'll be back tonight.

Ooh! It's freezing in here!

What happened to the heat?

By the time it gets up here, it's air-conditioning,

Mama, did you see my can of hairspray?

No, honey.

Yeah, it's under the sink.

I used it last night to wipe out some bugs.

You used my hairspray on bugs?

Yeah, but it didn't do a thing for them.

They was all bald.

Enough of that, JJ.

How do you expect to do on your report cards today?

Well, I'm a cinch to cop an A in Art.

You always do that. What about your other classes?

What kind of marks do you expect?

Well, algebra, so-so.

English, could be,

History, maybe,

and Español, comme-çi, comme-ça.

Comme-çi, comme-ça is French, stupid.

Which gives you an idea how I'm doing in Español.

I just hope your grades are good enough

to get you through the 11th grade.

You're the tallest boy in that class.

You think I'm having problems, Mama?

You should see the kid who sits behind me.

He's five feet four.

He can't pass

'cause he's having trouble seeing the blackboard.

And you're right with him.

JJ, you haven't got a prayer of passing.

You never even looked at a book this term.

Keep her talking, Michael.

I'll grab the bathroom.

Oh, no, you don't! I was there first!

Those with the shortest legs

got the longest wait.

Mama, does a rich man have more than one bathroom?

Yeah, but just like a poor man,

he can't use but one at a time.

Get dressed.

You're going to be late for school.

Foxy mama!

Cool it, lover boy.

My husband is due home any minute.

Oh, James!

It's you, foxy papa.

You'd better believe it.

Except neither one of us

has had a chance to be very foxy

since you been working that midnight shift.

Well, baby, I've got a feeling

all that's going to change real soon.

The janitorial service is looking for a foreman

for the day shift,

and they're considering me.

A foreman's job, huh?

That's right, baby.

I'm going to be the boss...

the main man.

A cat ain't doing his work to my satisfaction,

I say just to him, "Hey, Robinson..."

Robinson?

You call your employees by their last name?

Well, baby, that is an employer's prerogative.

Hey, Robinson. I don't like the way

you're washing them windows, man.

You're just hanging out the window, day-dreaming.

You finished, chump.

Give me that safety belt.

Cat didn't even hang around for his paycheck.

Oh, James, it sure would be fine if you get that job.

When do you think you'll know for sure?

They're supposed to call me for an interview today,

and if we're lucky,

it's back to regular hours, regular meals...

And regular loving.

Have mercy!

Mama! Papa!

Isn't there any decency?

Come on, kids, have your breakfast,

or you'll be late for school.

James, I'll heat you up some stew for breakfast.

I think I'll just have some coffee, baby.

Daddy, don't forget to sign my report card.

I got all As.

All right, my man.

And I get my report card today, Daddy.

I should get mostly As and Bs.

Good.

You want to talk about your report card now, Junior?

I sure would like to, Dad,

but it's my turn to say the blessing.

All right, son, go ahead,

and take this hat off.

Lord, thank you for the food,

and now that I've done something for you,

I could use a boost in the algebra department.

Amen.

JJ, you are not supposed to use your prayers

to ask for personal favors.

You know, Junior, when you was born,

I just dreamed of the day that you'd go to college.

I never figured on

a little stumbling block called "high school."

James, let's don't jump to any conclusions.

I was a little bit worried too,

but JJ has passed before,

and he probably will pass again.

That's right.

I always get off to a slow start,

but I always come through in the stretch.

JJ, you wouldn't care to bet

on making it to the 12th grade, would you?

Yeah, and if I pass,

I'm in the bathroom first for a whole month. A bet?

And if you don't pass,

you do the dishes for a whole month.

A bet?

A bet.

Hey, it's getting late. You kids better get moving, now.

Time's running out.

Bye, Ma.

Bye, sweetheart.

Bye, now.

You be careful.

Okay, Mama, we'll be careful.

And you all go straight to school, you hear?

And come straight home.

Yeah, without a doubt. See you!

Okay, baby.

Oh, baby, I sure hope Junior does make it.

Me too.

Imagine, next year,

this family will go to its first high school graduation.

Yeah, Florida, that's something I've been looking forward to.

The whole family sitting there

watching Junior march down the aisle

in his cap and gown,

the head of his graduation class...

I'll settle for the middle of the class.

I'll settle for the end of the line.

Hi.

Hi.

I smell meat.

What happened? Junior mug a cow?

No, I'm heating up some stew for James' breakfast.

He ought to be getting up soon.

Mmm, mmm, mmm. Stew at 2:00.

Honey, if I ever get married again,

I'm going to make sure my husband don't work nights...

except at home.

Like the Good Book says,

a husband shall cleaveth unto his wife,

and in that respect, I'm from Cleave-land.

Awfully quiet around here.

The kids aren't back home from school yet?

Nope.

This is the day of judgment.

Report card day!

Oh, I'm sure they'll all do fine.

I hope so, Willona.

Look, how do you like my new dress?

Hey, hey, hey.

What holds that up?

City Ordinance 705.

I'm wearing it for a wild date tonight.

Who's the lucky guy?

Name's Scooter Johnson.

Used to be a football player for the Chicago Bears.

Come on, now, where'd you meet him?

At the AA club.

Alcoholics Anonymous, Willona?

No, Alimony Anonymous.

It's a club for divorced people.

We got a limited membership,

but we had a great turnout last night.

38 men and six women.

How come only six women showed up?

'Cause that's our limit.

When you got a good thing going, you don't advertise.

Have a good time, Willona.

Honey, if I don't, this dress goes back tomorrow.

Hi, Willona, how you doing?

Ma, here's my report card. All As and one B.

I'll catch up with you yet, Michael.

Michael, Thelma, I'm so proud of you.

Oh, and look at that, Thelma.

An A in English,

B+... an A in History!

Oh, your daddy is going to be so proud of you.

We've got two geniuses here.

Well, Mama...

now from the sublime to the ridiculous.

That bad, huh?

Don't forget, Mama,

I'm the victim of 300 years of oppression.

All right! Just what I always wanted!

Sleep-in help.

Thelma, this is no time to tease your brother.

I won a bet, Ma! I won a bet.

Didn't you pass anything?

Don't forget, Mama,

I'm still your first born.

JJ, what are you talking about? You passed!

Passed?

Right on! Faked y'all out!

Dy-no-mite!

And girl, take a good look at that bathroom,

'cause that's the last time you will see it for a month.

What's all the hollering about?

James, JJ passed into the 12th grade.

Say what?

You heard me. JJ passed.

I heard you, but when your son scores the winning touchdown,

you want to hear it on instant replay.

You want an instant replay?

I'll show you an instant replay.

Faked y'all out!

Oh, Junior, I'm really proud of you, son.

You got an A in Art

and a C in all the rest of your classes.

How, Junior?

How'd you get those grades without doing any studying?

I'll tell you how.

'Cause I'm blessed with total recall.

I read something once, and it stays right here,

like it's chiseled in stone.

You mean penciled in Silly Putty.

JJ, you got a C in History on your report card,

but you got an F on this History exam.

How come?

I can explain that, Mama. Good.

Then maybe you can also tell me what happened in the year 1066.

How should I know?

I wasn't even born yet.

Junior, your mother asked you a question.

Now, go on and tell her what happened in 1066.

The Battle of Hastings.

Right. Come on, Junior, tell us.

What happened in 1066?

That's easy.

See, I was just kidding before.

I figure these things out by word association.

Now, what is the first thing a referee says to a boxer

when he's counted out?

10, right?

So right away, I know that 10 stands for "boxer."

Now, the 66.

I add 10 to the 66, and that gives me 76.

That's the year

the colonies rebelled against England,

which gives me the word "rebellion."

You put "boxer" with "rebellion,"

and what do you get?

1066. Boxer Rebellion!

I ought to box your ears.

1066 was the Battle of Hastings.

Well, my system issubject to human error.

All right, let's try algebra.

If it takes two men three days

to dig a ditch 20 feet by 30 feet long,

how long would it take four men

to dig the same ditch?

Come on, Junior, tell her.

Aw, come on, Dad.

I ain't no ditch-digger.

I'm an artiste.

What do I have to know algebra for, anyway?

What am I, an Algerian?

There's something wrong with this report card.

I'm reading Cs, but I'm hearing Fs.

Something tells me you ain't learning nothing.

Maybe we ought to go down to that school

and have a talk with your principal.

I tell you, this is the last time

I'm coming home with a good report card.

We're going to give you one more chance.

Now, if you don't answer this question,

we're going to march you

straight down to the principal's office.

Fair enough.

I have confidence in my ability.

Go ahead. Lay it on me.

What is a dangling participle?

Well, let's go.

Honey, your daddy and I

want everything to work out right.

Now, wait here.

Come on, Mama. How can I have a fair trial

without being allowed in there?

We want to talk to the principal alone first.

Mama, my life is on the line.

I demand the right to defend my life in person.

Shut up.

I withdraw the demand.

Come in.

I'm Mr. Kirkman.

Hi, Mr. Kirkman. I'm Mr. Evans.

This is Mrs. Evans.

How do you do?

Sit down, please.

Thank you.

Well, how can I help you folks?

Well, we came here

to complain about our son's grades.

Oh, that's too bad.

You have no idea how often I hear that.

The boy's failing...

The boy's passing.

I'm sorry, folks.

There's nothing I can do-- he's passing?

That's right.

Well, then, what's the problem?

His head.

Whatever you all are putting in here,

he's leaving someplace else,

'cause he sure ain't bringing it home.

Yeah, he don't know what happened in 1066,

and if you put him in a ditch 20 by 30 feet,

there ain't no way in the world

he could dig hisself out.

Here, look at this.

Well, now, Mr. and Mrs. Evans, this is a good report.

All Cs and an A in art--

young James is doing well.

Yeah, but old James wants to know how he did it.

Our son is going to be facing a tough world pretty soon,

and we want to make sure he has a real education.

We don't want him pushed through high school

like he was going through a three-minute car wash

and coming out still wet behind his ears.

Mr. and Mrs. Evans,

I appreciate how you feel about your son's education,

but, you see,

we lack the facilities and money

that schools in more privileged areas have.

This has been happening in all the cities

in the United States.

You do understand that, hm?

Oh, yeah, we understand the lack of money real good.

Well, that's good.

Perhaps you could understand this.

I have thousands of students in this school,

and a graduating class of over 600.

Now, if I don't graduate

a large percentage of that group,

I wind up looking like I'm not doing too good a job.

You, uh...you dig?

Better than that. We understand.

Well, now, if I don't graduate a high percentage,

our budget is cut,

and if our budget is cut, our teaching staff suffers,

and if our teachers suffer, the students' education suffers.

Mr. Kirkman,

that's exactly what we came here to talk to you about.

You certainly did.

I see we're in total agreement.

Total agreement, my foot, man.

We're in total confusion.

Sir, you have to understand the system.

One hand washes the other.

You have to help us move the pupils along,

and I'll help you by giving your son a diploma,

and with that diploma, help him get a job.

A job? What the hell good is a job, man?

I've got a job. I've got two jobs.

Hell, I had jobs all my life,

but I want something more for my son.

I want him to have an opportunity,

and you and I both know

that opportunities only come through an education.

Either James Evans Jr. gets a good education,

or we're going to know why.

That's right.

But, folks, the system...

Hey, Mr. Kirkman, please don't make me tell you

what you can do with your system.

You really want me to keep your son in the 11th grade?

You got it.

You realize

that he'll be falling behind his classmates.

Do you think he'll agree to that?

I assure you he'll agree to it.

James, it has to be his own decision.

Come in, Junior.

Now, JJ, you've got a big decision to make.

James,

it's up to you now.

If you want to move along in the senior year

with your classmates,

our school is right behind you.

We found out they're just pushing you through here.

Them grades you got, you didn't deserve them.

They just gave them to you to get rid of you.

But we told Mr. Kirkman our son came to school to learn,

not to just get pushed around.

'Cause he's got pride.

Just like his daddy,

and nobody's going to push him through school

without putting something into his head.

'Cause he's got pride.

So Mr. Kirkman is giving you a choice.

Now, either you do the smart thing

and stay in the 11th grade

or let them push you through the 12th grade

like a big jackass.

Now, make up your mind, son.

And remember, Junior, you got pride.

Well, what do you say, Junior?

Well, Mr. Kirkman...

I'm proud to go along with your quota system

and take my place in the senior class.

JJ, I don't know what's going to become of you,

sliding through school like this.

Oh, Mama, don't worry about me.

I can always make a living as a painter.

That's right, Mama. He's an artist,

and artists don't need intelligence.

JJ, I've got to tell you

that your daddy and me was real disappointed in you today.

Aw, Mama!

You're going to need that education

when the school turns you out into the streets.

Mama, what's going to happen?

Somebody is going to pull me into an alley and say,

"Tell me what happened in 1066,

otherwise I'll blow your brains out?"

He could blow your brains out with a soda straw.

Look who's talking about smarts.

The same girl

who talks to pictures of Billy Dee Williams

and cries when they don't answer back.

You two get along like Sonny and Cher.

Ma, don't be mad.

I'm not mad.

I may do real good in the 12th grade.

I may surprise you.

They may even pick me to make the graduation speech.

That'll be the day.

Thelma...

Classmates, parents,

faculty, and juvenile authorities.

As we leave these ivory-colored walls,

let us be inspired by our principal,

who once said,

"Show me a man who can laugh when he's down,

and I'll show you a happy wino."

I would now like to leave you

with these two Latin words--

Cesar Romero.

You know, that's the closest you've been to a book all year.

How did you do with the interview, honey?

Daddy, are you going to be the new foreman?

No, baby.

Oh, Daddy, I'm sorry.

You want to tell me about it, James?

There's not much to tell, baby.

Went down there,

and the man said I was qualified and had the experience,

but when I got to the application,

that's where I blew it. How?

You know on the bottom of the application

where they ask you to put down

why you think you're the right man for the job?

Well, baby, I just couldn't put my words together.

The words I could think of,

I wasn't sure if I was spelling them right,

and the words I was sure could spell

didn't have nothing to do with what they wanted.

And, Florida, it was a chance,

and you don't get too many chances

when all you got going for you is a sixth-grade education.

Well, there's another way of looking at it, honey.

At least you're getting turned down

on better jobs.

Daddy, I've been thinking.

Yeah, Junior?

You know, it ain't that I don't want to learn.

It's just that I was too proud to be left behind my classmates,

so...

JJ, does that mean

you're going to stay in the 11th grade?

I said I'm proud, Mama, not crazy.

But what I was thinking

was that next term in my senior year

I'm going to study hard,

I'm going to pay attention in class,

and I'm going to do my homework,

and if I get stuck, I'll ask somebody to help me.

I'm always available, Junior.

Son, now you're talking sense, 'cause you know, Junior,

I don't want you to ever blow an opportunity

because you don't know how to hang the right words together.

You hear me? All right.

Baby, think Junior can make it through his senior year?

He already has.

You should have heard his graduation speech.

It was beautiful.

He left us with two Latin words--

Cesar Romero.

[TELEVISION BLARING]

Children, turn that sound down.

Your brother is studying.

If he's studying so hard,

let's see if he knows the answer

to that algebra problem.

Hey, JJ, if it takes two men three days

to dig a ditch 20 feet by 30 feet,

how long would it take four men

to dig the same ditch?

That's easy.

Eight weeks.

JJ, keep studying.

How come it takes so long, son?

'Cause one of those men is Ned the Wino,

and it takes a long time to shovel dirt,

pick up Ned,

shovel dirt,

pick up Ned,

shovel dirt,

pick up Ned...

* Mmm *

* Just looking out of the window *

* Watching the asphalt grow *

* Thinking how it all looks hand-me-down *

* Good Times Good Times *

* Keeping your head above water *

* Making a wave when you can *

* Temporary layoffs *

* Good Times *

NARRATOR: Good Times is recorded on tape

before a live audience.

* Ain't we lucky we got 'em *

* Good Times **