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1
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Sue, no, no, no!
2
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Kill yourself on your own time.
3
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:21,810
According to the Art of War by Sun Tzu,
4
00:03:22,060 --> 00:03:25,063
every battle is won and lost before it is fought.
5
00:03:25,230 --> 00:03:27,148
Well, then I guess you've already lost.
6
00:03:30,568 --> 00:03:33,821
Oh, that's not very sportsmanlike.
Let's fucking go!
7
00:04:00,053 --> 00:04:02,848
Ladies.
Hi again.
8
00:04:02,889 --> 00:04:04,724
Ok, this is the third time we've been out here.
9
00:04:04,641 --> 00:04:05,433
I know.
10
00:04:05,141 --> 00:04:06,351
We're shutting this party down.
11
00:04:06,351 --> 00:04:09,062
You don't wanna shut the party down.
You wanna join us.
12
00:04:08,978 --> 00:04:09,604
Alright?
13
00:04:09,562 --> 00:04:11,189
So why don't you put the guns back in the car
14
00:04:11,189 --> 00:04:12,857
and you come on in, and having good times?
15
00:04:13,024 --> 00:04:14,108
Hey, Bill.
16
00:04:14,108 --> 00:04:15,234
Sorry I'm late, buddy.
17
00:04:15,401 --> 00:04:16,318
Fucking Map Quest.
18
00:04:16,318 --> 00:04:17,277
I know it, bro.
19
00:04:17,444 --> 00:04:20,155
I'm right with you with that shit.
Hey look, guys.
20
00:04:20,322 --> 00:04:23,783
Is this about earlier? When you first came on,
and I thought you were strippers?
21
00:04:23,950 --> 00:04:25,577
Because that was an accident.
22
00:04:25,577 --> 00:04:27,245
Alright? You're just very attractive.
23
00:04:27,412 --> 00:04:28,705
Those uniforms are banging.
24
00:04:28,871 --> 00:04:32,166
Seriously, if we have to come out here again,
it's a $1000 fine.
25
00:04:32,333 --> 00:04:33,334
Close it down.
26
00:04:33,334 --> 00:04:34,335
Okay.
27
00:04:34,502 --> 00:04:35,711
Message received.
28
00:04:35,878 --> 00:04:37,212
It's done.
You have my word.
29
00:04:37,379 --> 00:04:39,882
I'm gonna go inside,
get on the mike, shut it down.
30
00:04:56,855 --> 00:04:59,358
I don't understand why you won't just put it on.
31
00:04:59,483 --> 00:05:01,610
Because I don't find the notion of mocking
32
00:05:01,818 --> 00:05:04,529
the American underclass as amusing as your friends do,
33
00:05:04,696 --> 00:05:07,365
and partly because I don't share your desperate need to fit in.
34
00:05:07,532 --> 00:05:10,451
By not putting the wig on,
you are deliberately setting yourself
35
00:05:10,618 --> 00:05:11,994
and me apart from my friends,
36
00:05:12,161 --> 00:05:14,955
which is a controlling and hostile gesture.
37
00:05:15,122 --> 00:05:16,540
Fine.
38
00:05:20,544 --> 00:05:21,169
Happy now?
39
00:05:21,044 --> 00:05:21,670
Yes!
40
00:05:21,628 --> 00:05:22,796
Now I'm Mr. Fun Times.
41
00:05:22,421 --> 00:05:24,214
I'm very happy about that. Thank you.
42
00:05:24,256 --> 00:05:25,382
I'm going for a smoke.
43
00:05:24,965 --> 00:05:27,884
Good, because it's.. it's a fucking costume party.
44
00:05:30,928 --> 00:05:33,472
Do we need to talk quietly around her?
45
00:05:33,556 --> 00:05:36,058
Oh, no, no, no.
She sleeps through anything.
46
00:05:36,141 --> 00:05:37,643
Yes, you do.
47
00:05:37,768 --> 00:05:42,064
When the babysitter bailed, Glenn and I were like,
'Fuck it.' We have missed every party.
48
00:05:42,147 --> 00:05:44,232
No way we're missing the White Trash Bash.
49
00:05:44,316 --> 00:05:47,944
Give it up for Glenn.
Glenn's getting married soon.
50
00:05:48,027 --> 00:05:50,363
I really did it.
51
00:05:51,989 --> 00:05:54,158
What's the deal with your bachelorette weekend?
52
00:05:53,949 --> 00:05:54,658
Yeah!
53
00:05:54,950 --> 00:05:55,701
Ok, I think it's gonna be
54
00:05:55,784 --> 00:05:57,745
more of a bachelorette night.
55
00:05:58,037 --> 00:06:01,748
And it's gonna be at my folks' place in Jersey.
56
00:06:02,207 --> 00:06:03,458
Oh.
57
00:06:03,959 --> 00:06:04,459
Sorry.
58
00:06:04,709 --> 00:06:07,170
No! That's gonna be fine.
That's totally fine.
59
00:06:07,378 --> 00:06:08,713
Has anyone seen Glenn?
60
00:06:08,796 --> 00:06:11,466
Human torpedo!
61
00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:25,770
It's okay.
He's a doctor.
62
00:06:30,149 --> 00:06:32,068
Hey, buttheads,
you guys seen Duquez?
63
00:06:32,151 --> 00:06:34,111
Will you relax with the doughnuts?
64
00:06:34,195 --> 00:06:38,365
Oh, sweetie, I want to. Look, I'm trying to push
the savory on this people and all they want is the sweet.
65
00:06:38,449 --> 00:06:39,783
I promise you no one cares.
66
00:06:39,867 --> 00:06:42,202
Hey.
Where the fuck are the doughnuts?
67
00:06:42,536 --> 00:06:43,703
Except him.
68
00:06:43,954 --> 00:06:46,122
Guess what. D.Duquez is AWOL.
69
00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:46,915
That is unacceptable.
70
00:06:46,915 --> 00:06:49,375
This fucking behaviour is unacceptable.
I got have it out with that guy.
71
00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:51,544
Like the doughnut police.
72
00:06:51,627 --> 00:06:54,213
Hey, get off of that thing.
It's Saturday night.
73
00:06:54,296 --> 00:06:57,883
Well, it's Sunday in Korea,
and those motherfuckers don't stop working.
74
00:06:57,966 --> 00:07:00,302
Honestly, they make the Japanese look like Jamaicans.
75
00:07:00,385 --> 00:07:01,970
Is that the new Blackberry?
76
00:07:01,970 --> 00:07:03,597
Yes, it is new Blackberry. Got it at the office.
77
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:06,891
You know what? As punishment for not dressing up,
I'm putting this down my pants.
78
00:07:06,975 --> 00:07:08,977
No, no, no!
Just don't do that!
79
00:07:09,060 --> 00:07:10,603
My dick's checking your e-mail.
80
00:07:10,686 --> 00:07:11,187
I'm sending a text.
81
00:07:11,187 --> 00:07:11,896
No, just don't do that!
82
00:07:12,521 --> 00:07:15,399
You have my life in your pants.
You cocksucker.
83
00:07:23,406 --> 00:07:26,493
Hey, you two,
get a room or get a video camera.
84
00:07:28,745 --> 00:07:30,455
Hello.
Excuse me, miss.
85
00:07:30,538 --> 00:07:33,207
My name is Eric. This is my house.
My party, sort of.
86
00:07:33,291 --> 00:07:36,585
See, you're looking at a bunch different of options.
But, this is the one you want go for it..
87
00:07:36,669 --> 00:07:39,213
This is the finest box of wine in the county.
88
00:07:39,296 --> 00:07:39,922
Really?
89
00:07:39,922 --> 00:07:40,547
Yes, delicious
90
00:07:40,631 --> 00:07:44,676
It has absolutely no body and an
amazing cough-syrupy aftertaste.
91
00:07:44,759 --> 00:07:45,260
Go ahead.
92
00:07:45,427 --> 00:07:45,927
Cheers.
93
00:07:46,094 --> 00:07:48,888
Knock it up! Don't get it on your skin.
All right?
94
00:07:51,015 --> 00:07:52,141
Not bad, right?
95
00:07:52,141 --> 00:07:52,850
Mmm. Really good wine.
96
00:07:54,643 --> 00:07:55,478
Even better bean dip.
97
00:07:55,478 --> 00:07:56,228
That's not bean dip!
98
00:07:56,228 --> 00:07:57,521
What?!
99
00:07:57,604 --> 00:07:58,397
I'm kidding.
100
00:07:58,439 --> 00:08:00,357
You knew that.
That's awesome.
101
00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:01,566
You're only the first person to actually eat out of that.
102
00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:04,778
Yeah, not many people are thrilled about eating out of a shitter.
103
00:08:04,778 --> 00:08:05,654
---
104
00:08:05,654 --> 00:08:05,945
Really?
105
00:08:06,946 --> 00:08:08,656
Couse in prison, we used our crapper as a punchbowl.
106
00:08:09,073 --> 00:08:10,533
Really?
No kidding?
107
00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:13,202
I have never seen you at one of these things.
I'm i wrong?
108
00:08:13,285 --> 00:08:13,994
First time.
109
00:08:14,245 --> 00:08:15,287
Really? We'll have to change that.
110
00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:17,206
We do these kind of things all the time. You know..
111
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:20,334
Labor Day. We're gonna have a big Winter Wonderland party.
112
00:08:20,292 --> 00:08:21,043
It's gonna be nice.
113
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:22,627
It's gonna be.. Snow machine..
114
00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:24,879
Gonna be sledding.
Should be interesting.
115
00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,881
You should give me your information.
116
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:27,549
What?
117
00:08:27,549 --> 00:08:28,174
"Information"?
118
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:28,883
Are you kidding me?
119
00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:29,550
No.
120
00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:30,176
Really?
121
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:30,760
Yes.
122
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:32,053
Yes, like what?
123
00:08:32,136 --> 00:08:34,555
Like my social security number,
my college GPA?
124
00:08:34,638 --> 00:08:37,975
Why don't we shirt with your
phone number and your shoe size?
125
00:08:40,769 --> 00:08:42,187
I happen to have a pen.
126
00:08:42,687 --> 00:08:44,105
Of course you have a pen.
127
00:08:43,688 --> 00:08:46,399
You gotta be ready.
Always be prepared.
128
00:08:46,483 --> 00:08:47,692
What?
129
00:08:47,775 --> 00:08:48,818
On my baby.
130
00:08:48,818 --> 00:08:49,861
Look at that.
131
00:08:49,944 --> 00:08:53,114
Oh, I'm so jealous of this baby.
I'm so jealous.
132
00:08:53,197 --> 00:08:56,784
Oh, you wanna get out,
I wanna get in there. I'm kidding.
133
00:08:56,867 --> 00:08:58,619
Kelly, local number?
134
00:08:58,702 --> 00:08:59,828
Local girl.
135
00:08:59,912 --> 00:09:01,079
You kidding me?
136
00:09:01,163 --> 00:09:02,706
Size 9 shoe.
137
00:09:02,789 --> 00:09:05,333
You know what they say.
'Big shoe, big uterus.'
138
00:09:06,668 --> 00:09:08,711
I'll bring friends.
Real sorry.
139
00:09:08,795 --> 00:09:11,422
If you excuse me,
I see an old friend just showed up.
140
00:09:11,506 --> 00:09:12,673
I'll talk to you liner
141
00:09:12,757 --> 00:09:14,341
Okay.
It's very nice meeting you.
142
00:09:14,425 --> 00:09:15,968
Nice to meet you too.
Hey, fucko.
143
00:09:16,051 --> 00:09:17,594
Excuse me.
144
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,722
I'm really mad, actually.
145
00:09:19,805 --> 00:09:20,806
What's wrong with this guy?
146
00:09:20,806 --> 00:09:21,848
Bye, guys.
147
00:09:21,932 --> 00:09:23,350
Daddy's gotta go home.
148
00:09:23,433 --> 00:09:25,727
One more for the road.
Shotgun!
149
00:09:27,312 --> 00:09:27,896
Michael!
150
00:09:28,396 --> 00:09:29,605
I wasn't ready. Throw me another.
151
00:09:29,105 --> 00:09:29,814
Nice, asshole!
152
00:09:30,148 --> 00:09:31,190
You're supposed to catch that.
153
00:09:31,274 --> 00:09:32,733
Come on, baby, we're going.
154
00:09:32,817 --> 00:09:33,401
Bye, guys.
155
00:09:33,401 --> 00:09:33,984
Bye, Katie.
156
00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:35,861
I'm sorry if I got beer on your baby.
157
00:09:36,153 --> 00:09:37,738
You, you.
Where have you been?
158
00:09:37,821 --> 00:09:39,990
I'm sorry, man.
There was a fucking mess in the studio.
159
00:09:40,115 --> 00:09:42,117
There was this buzzing undertone
160
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,703
that was bending me over and fucking me in the ass.
161
00:09:45,286 --> 00:09:47,372
I'm not seeing any doughnuts.
162
00:09:46,955 --> 00:09:48,998
You specifically said get the glazed.
163
00:09:49,123 --> 00:09:51,501
They didn't have glazed.
I tried. There was jelly.
164
00:09:51,626 --> 00:09:55,004
There was Boston cream.
Jelly, Boston cream.
165
00:09:55,087 --> 00:09:58,006
Eric, I have a whole package of ginger candies in my bag.
166
00:09:58,799 --> 00:10:00,384
Hi, Willow.
167
00:10:00,425 --> 00:10:02,511
Mmm, thank you.
But we're gonna be okay.
168
00:10:02,594 --> 00:10:04,512
I found you a big brown naked!
169
00:10:04,596 --> 00:10:06,598
I can't get it off!
I can't shake it off!
170
00:10:06,681 --> 00:10:09,392
Hey, everybody naked in the pool.
171
00:10:14,146 --> 00:10:16,148
Well, that's a half hour ahead of schedule.
172
00:10:17,941 --> 00:10:20,652
Yeah!
Anybody?
173
00:10:20,777 --> 00:10:22,279
Anybody?
174
00:10:22,362 --> 00:10:24,781
Oh, you all suck.
Chicken shit!
175
00:10:24,864 --> 00:10:27,242
Want me to go to Brent's?
Pick up Entenmann's?
176
00:10:27,242 --> 00:10:29,035
No, no, don't worry about it. It's allright.
177
00:10:29,035 --> 00:10:30,536
Right now, I'm gonna go jump in that pool
178
00:10:30,578 --> 00:10:32,622
because McCrudden is dying in there alone.
179
00:10:32,705 --> 00:10:35,875
That's what friends do.
See, they don't leave each other hanging.
180
00:10:35,958 --> 00:10:38,377
Where's your patriotism?
181
00:10:38,460 --> 00:10:39,545
My man.
182
00:10:39,670 --> 00:10:41,254
I got you.
183
00:10:43,632 --> 00:10:45,300
My fucking blackberry.
184
00:11:10,782 --> 00:11:12,325
Hey dad, what are you doing here?
185
00:11:12,450 --> 00:11:14,285
Uh, hmm.
186
00:11:14,368 --> 00:11:17,538
Oh, yeah, I own the place.
Cherie, this is my son, Eric.
187
00:11:17,621 --> 00:11:19,915
Hi.
He's told me all about you.
188
00:11:21,958 --> 00:11:23,084
Ah, yeah.
189
00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:25,462
Great party.
Thanks for letting us sleep it off.
190
00:11:25,587 --> 00:11:26,421
No problem.
191
00:11:27,422 --> 00:11:30,133
Hm. It must have been quite a fiesta.
192
00:11:30,258 --> 00:11:31,467
Oh, yeah,
I guess so.
193
00:11:31,592 --> 00:11:33,344
Did the best I could with the turds.
194
00:11:33,427 --> 00:11:35,221
I know you did, Bill.
195
00:11:35,221 --> 00:11:36,972
I wish you would have let me know you were coming out.
196
00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:39,224
Maybe we can throw someone down on a couch.
Or something like that.
197
00:11:39,308 --> 00:11:40,851
Ah, we're not staying.
198
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:45,355
I just came out for the day to do a
meet-and-greet with the brokers.
199
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:46,606
Brokers?
200
00:11:46,731 --> 00:11:48,608
You got the message, right?
201
00:11:48,691 --> 00:11:50,693
I saw that you called.
202
00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:52,862
I'm putting the house on the market.
203
00:11:53,779 --> 00:11:55,948
What?
Wait, you're selling our house?
204
00:11:57,032 --> 00:12:00,369
Ah, I'm hardly ever out here any more.
205
00:12:00,494 --> 00:12:02,996
It's time to unload.
206
00:12:03,121 --> 00:12:04,456
But hey,
what about me?
207
00:12:04,539 --> 00:12:08,626
I'm always out here.
My friends are always out here.
208
00:12:09,210 --> 00:12:11,045
So make me an offer.
209
00:12:14,090 --> 00:12:16,383
Dad, come on.
I don't ask you for anything.
210
00:12:16,467 --> 00:12:18,427
How about this?
We go get breakfast.
211
00:12:18,510 --> 00:12:20,178
We talk over the house situation.
212
00:12:19,803 --> 00:12:21,930
Maybe we all can chip in for utilities?
213
00:12:22,264 --> 00:12:24,224
Ah, I'm a little pressed for time, kiddo.
214
00:12:25,100 --> 00:12:29,103
We're gonna go play a quick nine and then got get back.
215
00:12:28,811 --> 00:12:30,563
Cherie's never played before.
216
00:12:30,688 --> 00:12:32,023
I'm so excited.
217
00:12:32,148 --> 00:12:33,733
Dad, this is fucking bullshit.
218
00:12:33,816 --> 00:12:36,902
I'll call you next week.
We'll do yoga.
219
00:12:48,162 --> 00:12:50,873
I've said it before and I'll say it again.
220
00:12:50,957 --> 00:12:53,626
Your dad is a selfish prick.
221
00:12:54,210 --> 00:12:56,253
Smoothie?
222
00:12:55,836 --> 00:12:57,963
It's gonna be sad not coming out here anymore.
223
00:12:58,047 --> 00:13:00,549
Me and Willy might not even be around next summer.
224
00:13:00,632 --> 00:13:03,051
The L.A. thing again?
Are you serious?
225
00:13:03,135 --> 00:13:05,220
You just moved into that place in Brooklyn.
226
00:13:05,303 --> 00:13:07,639
But Willow's doing really good with her acting career.
227
00:13:07,722 --> 00:13:10,516
She did that Pizza Hut Latin America commercial now.
228
00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:12,727
Ooh, deliciosa!
229
00:13:14,145 --> 00:13:16,897
Her dad is gonna hook me up with a job at a big law firm.
230
00:13:16,981 --> 00:13:18,273
Dude, what about the fucking album?
231
00:13:18,357 --> 00:13:20,442
I'll work on the album while I'm doing law things.
232
00:13:20,525 --> 00:13:21,735
Oh, yeah? Will you?
233
00:13:21,735 --> 00:13:22,944
You know what I'm excited about?
234
00:13:23,528 --> 00:13:26,489
Throwing one of these parties
in my one-bedroom apartment in New York city.
235
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:27,782
That'll be fun, right?
236
00:13:27,574 --> 00:13:30,076
Maybe I can put, like, the food out on the fire escape.
237
00:13:30,660 --> 00:13:31,285
Eric.
238
00:13:30,785 --> 00:13:32,036
The band in the bathroom.
239
00:13:32,119 --> 00:13:33,537
I have to get more outlets though.
240
00:13:33,621 --> 00:13:35,998
I'll get a power strip.
Why not? I'll splurge.
241
00:13:36,915 --> 00:13:37,624
What?
242
00:13:37,374 --> 00:13:39,501
This is a major moment.
243
00:13:39,501 --> 00:13:41,503
It's okay to let the hurt in.
244
00:13:41,503 --> 00:13:45,507
To allow yourself to actually be present in a moment.
245
00:13:45,090 --> 00:13:48,218
Okay, thanks, doc.
You really make the moment more real
246
00:13:48,218 --> 00:13:50,720
by talking about how real the moment is in the middle.
247
00:13:50,803 --> 00:13:53,889
No, I understand.
You're probably feeling
248
00:13:53,973 --> 00:13:56,267
some anger and some misdirected frustra...
249
00:13:57,976 --> 00:13:59,019
Feel better now?
250
00:13:59,019 --> 00:14:00,062
A little bit, yeah.
251
00:14:00,270 --> 00:14:01,271
Dude, that was awesome.
252
00:14:01,772 --> 00:14:02,439
Oh, fuck!
253
00:14:03,773 --> 00:14:05,150
What about now?
254
00:14:04,983 --> 00:14:06,151
Oh, much better.
255
00:14:06,443 --> 00:14:08,152
Now I'm in the moment.
256
00:14:10,113 --> 00:14:12,281
I don't understand all the summer school things.
257
00:14:11,489 --> 00:14:14,200
Isn't the point of being a teacher
that you get summers off?
258
00:14:14,283 --> 00:14:17,536
Yeah, well, they pay us poop, so,
what am I gonna do, waitress?
259
00:14:17,619 --> 00:14:20,205
Oh, my God,
the big news.
260
00:14:20,747 --> 00:14:24,042
So the principal told me today
261
00:14:23,625 --> 00:14:29,130
that the friendship bracelets that the girls
are wearing are actually sex bracelets.
262
00:14:30,673 --> 00:14:32,717
I saw something about that on Oprah.
263
00:14:33,134 --> 00:14:35,386
Girls wear these different color bracelets
264
00:14:35,469 --> 00:14:38,388
and every color represents, like,
a sex thing.
265
00:14:38,472 --> 00:14:41,058
So if you tear off a girl's blue bracelet,
266
00:14:41,141 --> 00:14:43,059
that means she has to give you oral.
267
00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:45,520
What's a yellow bracelet?
268
00:14:45,020 --> 00:14:46,146
Uh, a hug.
269
00:14:46,312 --> 00:14:46,938
Aww. Oh, sweet.
270
00:14:46,938 --> 00:14:47,605
I know.
271
00:14:47,605 --> 00:14:50,024
What about purple?
272
00:14:50,024 --> 00:14:51,025
Teabagging?
273
00:14:52,944 --> 00:14:54,028
Really?
274
00:14:54,195 --> 00:14:56,155
Well, what is teabagging?
275
00:14:56,322 --> 00:14:57,364
Balls in mouth.
276
00:14:57,531 --> 00:14:59,158
Oh, no!
277
00:14:59,324 --> 00:15:02,035
Teabagging? What is with the kids today?
278
00:15:02,035 --> 00:15:05,038
Well, the blowjob is the new French kiss.
279
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:06,998
Wow, we really missed the boat on that one.
280
00:15:07,165 --> 00:15:09,834
I feel like if we had had sex bracelets back then,
281
00:15:10,001 --> 00:15:11,586
no one would have torn mine off.
282
00:15:11,752 --> 00:15:13,963
No, no, no, sweetie.
283
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:16,340
I would have torn off your BJ bracelet.
284
00:15:16,507 --> 00:15:19,134
You're just saying that,
but thanks, Eric.
285
00:15:19,301 --> 00:15:20,927
Thanks for letting me blow you.
286
00:15:21,094 --> 00:15:22,220
You're welcome.
287
00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:23,346
You're such a good friend.
288
00:15:27,684 --> 00:15:30,186
Hey, Dody.
289
00:15:33,356 --> 00:15:35,691
Hi. Can I help you?
290
00:15:35,858 --> 00:15:36,650
Are you Eric?
291
00:15:36,650 --> 00:15:37,484
Yes.
292
00:15:37,651 --> 00:15:39,653
Hi. We spoke on the phone.
293
00:15:39,820 --> 00:15:42,489
I'm Dody Henderson from the Henderson Realty Group.
294
00:15:42,656 --> 00:15:44,574
And this is my associate Kelly Tanner.
295
00:15:44,741 --> 00:15:47,160
Hi. How are you?
296
00:15:48,828 --> 00:15:49,912
No, thank you.
297
00:15:49,746 --> 00:15:50,830
Lame.
298
00:15:50,997 --> 00:15:51,998
Oh, I shouldn't.
299
00:15:53,332 --> 00:15:56,085
We can't wait to get your house sold.
300
00:15:56,252 --> 00:15:58,504
We need this place clean, clean, clean every day.
301
00:15:58,629 --> 00:16:00,172
Water the lawns,
skim the pool.
302
00:16:00,255 --> 00:16:04,593
You never know when buyers are
gonna stop by to say hi and buy, buy.
303
00:16:04,759 --> 00:16:06,553
Oh, B-U-Y!
Ha, ha!
304
00:16:06,719 --> 00:16:08,763
Whatever.
305
00:16:08,888 --> 00:16:12,850
Oh, and make sure the toilets
are clean enough to eat out of it.
306
00:16:13,017 --> 00:16:14,518
Yeah, whatever.
307
00:16:15,019 --> 00:16:17,813
Maybe I should sprinkle some
rose petals on the driveway every morning too.
308
00:16:17,980 --> 00:16:19,523
Just do what you can.
309
00:16:19,648 --> 00:16:20,357
Will do.
310
00:16:22,401 --> 00:16:25,695
What are the chances of maybe
selling this sometime after Labor Day?
311
00:16:26,488 --> 00:16:28,990
You wanna sell a summer home during the summer.
312
00:16:29,157 --> 00:16:30,366
That's kind of the point.
313
00:16:31,242 --> 00:16:33,285
So glad we're in business together.
314
00:16:33,411 --> 00:16:34,703
Om shanti.
315
00:16:35,496 --> 00:16:37,206
Om shanti it is.
316
00:16:40,626 --> 00:16:41,626
Vultures.
317
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:42,294
Yeesh.
318
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:47,048
It's light.
It's light.
319
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:49,342
We should put it up more closer.
Like there?
320
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:52,887
Oh, yeah.
That'll bring in all the right clientele.
321
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:05,231
Listen. Have you given any more
thought to the final Labor Day blowout?
322
00:17:05,398 --> 00:17:06,566
I really don't know.
323
00:17:06,691 --> 00:17:09,110
I mean, obviously,
we got do something huge.
324
00:17:09,277 --> 00:17:11,571
But what do you do for a final blowout?
325
00:17:11,696 --> 00:17:14,323
Go out in a fucking blaze of glory.
Heads held high. You know what i'm sayin?
326
00:17:14,448 --> 00:17:15,115
I get it.
327
00:17:15,115 --> 00:17:15,908
Deserved it.
328
00:17:16,075 --> 00:17:17,826
Holy shit. Oh, shit.
Here we go. Bingo.
329
00:17:17,951 --> 00:17:18,660
What?
330
00:17:18,660 --> 00:17:19,828
I got the concept right here.
331
00:17:19,953 --> 00:17:21,413
Brown party...
332
00:17:21,955 --> 00:17:23,081
Brown party.- Brown party...
333
00:17:23,206 --> 00:17:25,375
Brown clothes,
brown food, brown drink,
334
00:17:25,542 --> 00:17:27,418
brown clown,
brown balloons,
335
00:17:27,418 --> 00:17:29,629
live music supplied by Jackson Browne.
336
00:17:31,339 --> 00:17:32,840
I don't know what you're thinking right now.
Is that good?
337
00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:34,300
It's fucking awful.
338
00:17:34,759 --> 00:17:37,428
Alright, take it easy.
I'm just spit balling headchief.
339
00:17:37,428 --> 00:17:39,346
It's not like you're throwing ideas my way.
340
00:17:39,471 --> 00:17:40,555
He spells with an E at the end.
341
00:17:40,555 --> 00:17:41,640
Doesn't matter.
342
00:17:41,807 --> 00:17:43,308
Holy shit.
We got a situation here.
343
00:17:44,601 --> 00:17:46,311
Oh, my fucking God.
344
00:17:46,978 --> 00:17:49,230
Dude, she's wearing a sex bracelet.
345
00:17:48,855 --> 00:17:50,231
Holy fuck,
she is.
346
00:17:50,356 --> 00:17:52,275
Oh, boy,
that's trouble.
347
00:17:52,275 --> 00:17:53,359
It's blue. It's blue.
348
00:17:53,984 --> 00:17:55,986
Sword swallower.
349
00:17:55,319 --> 00:17:57,321
Holy fuck man, when she reaches out for my cone
350
00:17:57,321 --> 00:17:58,197
I'm gonna snag that thing
351
00:17:58,363 --> 00:18:00,490
and it's deep-throat city all night long.
352
00:18:00,616 --> 00:18:01,950
No, no, no.
353
00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:04,286
Please don't do that. Don't. No, stop.
354
00:18:05,203 --> 00:18:06,913
Stop! Stop it
355
00:18:08,581 --> 00:18:11,584
I bet she unhinges her jaw like a
fucking python swallowing a rat.
356
00:18:11,417 --> 00:18:14,211
Um, do you guys know what you want?
357
00:18:14,628 --> 00:18:15,254
Yes, we do.
358
00:18:15,254 --> 00:18:16,755
Yeah. We got a pretty good idea.
359
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:18,507
No, ice cream is what we're into.
360
00:18:21,510 --> 00:18:25,221
Do you think a girl like that looks at
us like we're a couple of old dudes?
361
00:18:25,388 --> 00:18:26,473
You know like the way we used to look at
362
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:28,641
30-year-old guys back in high school and say,
363
00:18:28,766 --> 00:18:32,311
'Oh, man, look at that lame old guy hitting on Sue.'
364
00:18:32,311 --> 00:18:35,231
Ha, ha. Yeah, probably.
365
00:18:35,231 --> 00:18:36,106
Shit, I don't know though.
366
00:18:36,106 --> 00:18:37,941
Weren't 30-year-old guys a lot older back then
367
00:18:37,941 --> 00:18:39,651
with, like,
mustaches and jobs?
368
00:18:39,776 --> 00:18:41,987
Yeah It certainly seemed like it
369
00:18:43,363 --> 00:18:44,406
What?
370
00:18:44,531 --> 00:18:45,865
Fuck, dude, we're getting old.
371
00:18:45,865 --> 00:18:46,699
Bullshit. Come on.
372
00:18:46,866 --> 00:18:49,202
Seriously, I got a foot cramp the other day masturbating.
373
00:18:49,369 --> 00:18:50,828
What? Doesn't make sense.
374
00:18:50,828 --> 00:18:52,330
I swear to God. It happened.
375
00:18:52,496 --> 00:18:53,289
What about this,
376
00:18:53,289 --> 00:18:55,666
Do you think that girl and her
friends really have BJ orgy parties?
377
00:18:55,791 --> 00:18:56,625
Indubitably
378
00:18:56,625 --> 00:18:57,001
Really?
379
00:18:57,167 --> 00:18:59,169
Fucking 'A' man, Duquez is right.
We got fucking hosed.
380
00:18:59,294 --> 00:19:01,296
God dang.
381
00:19:02,297 --> 00:19:04,174
Hey, what about that?
382
00:19:04,299 --> 00:19:05,300
What about what?
383
00:19:05,425 --> 00:19:07,177
What about that for the final party?
384
00:19:07,510 --> 00:19:08,511
What?
385
00:19:08,511 --> 00:19:09,512
An orgy.
386
00:19:09,512 --> 00:19:10,596
An orgy?
387
00:19:10,596 --> 00:19:11,347
An orgy...
388
00:19:11,305 --> 00:19:12,306
You wanna have an fucking orgy?
389
00:19:12,306 --> 00:19:12,807
Yeah, why not?
390
00:19:12,932 --> 00:19:14,642
Get the fuck out of town.
It'll never happen.
391
00:19:14,809 --> 00:19:16,060
Why not?
392
00:19:16,185 --> 00:19:18,312
Because people don't have orgies,
you know?
393
00:19:18,437 --> 00:19:19,897
Oh, come on.
They used to.
394
00:19:20,063 --> 00:19:20,647
True.
395
00:19:20,647 --> 00:19:21,857
Yeah, think about it, dude.
396
00:19:22,023 --> 00:19:24,901
An orgy.
A good old-fashioned orgy.
397
00:19:25,402 --> 00:19:26,194
Wowie.
398
00:19:26,194 --> 00:19:27,737
That is a blaze of glory.
399
00:19:27,904 --> 00:19:30,865
Okay.
Now you know I hate naysayers, right?
400
00:19:31,032 --> 00:19:32,491
But I'm gonna have to say nay.
401
00:19:32,658 --> 00:19:33,326
Really?
402
00:19:33,326 --> 00:19:33,993
Really.
403
00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:35,744
Are you throwing down the gauntlet?
404
00:19:35,911 --> 00:19:37,830
Oops, what's that?
405
00:19:37,955 --> 00:19:40,290
It's on the ground as we speak.
406
00:19:42,167 --> 00:19:43,502
We're gonna have an orgy.
407
00:19:44,794 --> 00:19:46,379
We're gonna have an orgy.
408
00:19:46,546 --> 00:19:48,381
Oh, boy.
Here we go.
409
00:19:49,924 --> 00:19:51,968
Okay, guys,
I've been mulling it over and
410
00:19:52,093 --> 00:19:54,053
I have a concept for the final fiesta.
411
00:19:54,178 --> 00:19:55,095
All right.
412
00:19:55,095 --> 00:19:55,971
What is it?
413
00:19:56,096 --> 00:19:56,805
Whoo!
414
00:19:56,805 --> 00:19:57,473
Fiesta
415
00:19:57,598 --> 00:19:59,641
Allright, while this will be the most spectacular
416
00:19:59,808 --> 00:20:03,979
and insane party any of us have taken part of,
it's not gonna be a big thing.
417
00:20:04,104 --> 00:20:05,397
It's just gonna be us.
418
00:20:05,563 --> 00:20:06,564
It's gonna be small,
419
00:20:08,024 --> 00:20:08,608
intimate,
420
00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:10,735
special.
421
00:20:11,027 --> 00:20:12,612
Oh, I'll make lasagna.
422
00:20:13,029 --> 00:20:14,405
Yummy.
423
00:20:14,029 --> 00:20:15,406
Oh, yeah.
424
00:20:15,197 --> 00:20:16,490
We're gonna have an orgy.
425
00:20:20,369 --> 00:20:21,370
Who?
426
00:20:21,370 --> 00:20:22,370
Us.
427
00:20:23,622 --> 00:20:24,789
Where?
428
00:20:24,789 --> 00:20:26,374
Here, right here. Labor Day weekend.
429
00:20:26,499 --> 00:20:30,378
Us?
A naked sex orgy?
430
00:20:30,503 --> 00:20:31,796
You're kidding, right?
431
00:20:31,796 --> 00:20:33,047
No, I'm not. Why not us?
432
00:20:33,172 --> 00:20:35,007
People used to have them all the time.
433
00:20:35,132 --> 00:20:36,342
All the time.
434
00:20:36,508 --> 00:20:38,010
Yeah! What happened to our generation?
435
00:20:38,135 --> 00:20:39,052
What happened?
436
00:20:39,052 --> 00:20:40,387
I'll tell you exactly what happened.
437
00:20:40,512 --> 00:20:43,265
AIDS.
438
00:20:43,390 --> 00:20:45,016
AIDS hit right when we hit puberty.
439
00:20:45,016 --> 00:20:47,393
And it scared the shit out of all of us.
440
00:20:47,393 --> 00:20:51,355
It turned sex into this big,
frightening thing.
441
00:20:51,522 --> 00:20:52,857
He's right.
442
00:20:53,024 --> 00:20:56,694
Kids today are freaks,
our parents were freaks,
443
00:20:56,819 --> 00:20:58,445
we're a bunch of fucking pussies.
444
00:20:58,570 --> 00:20:59,905
We're the lamest generation.
445
00:20:59,905 --> 00:21:01,198
This is our chance.
446
00:21:01,323 --> 00:21:02,574
Our chance to do it right.
447
00:21:02,699 --> 00:21:04,743
Take back what's been taken from us.
448
00:21:04,743 --> 00:21:06,077
Isn't that from Goonies?
449
00:21:06,077 --> 00:21:07,412
Yeah, I'm paraphrasing Goonies, yes.
450
00:21:07,412 --> 00:21:08,705
Orgy.
451
00:21:08,705 --> 00:21:10,039
Orgy...
452
00:21:10,164 --> 00:21:14,001
Orgy.
453
00:21:14,168 --> 00:21:16,462
Duquez, come on my men.
You're into this, right?
454
00:21:16,587 --> 00:21:19,923
What?
No.
455
00:21:20,048 --> 00:21:23,051
We're all friends.
It would just be too weird.
456
00:21:23,176 --> 00:21:24,886
How do you know unless you try?
457
00:21:25,512 --> 00:21:26,721
Ew!
458
00:21:26,221 --> 00:21:28,723
Look, if we all went into this with an open mind,
459
00:21:29,557 --> 00:21:31,434
it could be amazing.
460
00:21:30,975 --> 00:21:34,186
In theory,
a noble call to arms.
461
00:21:34,311 --> 00:21:39,024
In practice,
I cannot imagine a more awkward
462
00:21:39,191 --> 00:21:41,193
and uncomfortably terrible evening.
463
00:21:41,318 --> 00:21:44,112
Oh, laugh, laugh,
laugh all you want.
464
00:21:44,279 --> 00:21:46,489
Seriously, don't you get it?
This is it,
465
00:21:46,656 --> 00:21:49,701
the final blowout,
and then the house is gone.
466
00:21:49,867 --> 00:21:51,494
People move away.
467
00:21:51,494 --> 00:21:53,162
Things change.
468
00:21:53,329 --> 00:21:55,748
We need to think outside of the box.
469
00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:58,834
And inside the box.
470
00:21:59,001 --> 00:22:00,210
Eww.
471
00:22:00,377 --> 00:22:02,421
Mike, come on man, that's not what I'm going for.
472
00:22:02,587 --> 00:22:03,880
I'm in.
473
00:22:04,339 --> 00:22:05,465
What?
474
00:22:05,632 --> 00:22:06,674
Are you serious?
475
00:22:06,841 --> 00:22:08,926
Yes, it worked.
476
00:22:09,093 --> 00:22:10,845
Come on.
An orgy?
477
00:22:11,012 --> 00:22:12,346
It's madness.
478
00:22:12,513 --> 00:22:13,180
Ugh.
479
00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:15,558
It's gonna be a fucking blast.
480
00:22:15,724 --> 00:22:17,226
Success!
Success!
481
00:22:17,393 --> 00:22:19,520
Sue's in.
Thank you, yes.
482
00:22:19,686 --> 00:22:20,687
Here we go.
Come on.
483
00:22:20,854 --> 00:22:22,189
I'm gonna go meet Marcus.
484
00:22:22,189 --> 00:22:23,523
Oh, my God.
485
00:22:23,690 --> 00:22:26,234
All right, think it over.
Think it... Everybody, okay.
486
00:22:26,401 --> 00:22:27,694
All right,
I get it.
487
00:22:27,861 --> 00:22:30,696
It's gonna take a while to come
around on this whole orgy idea.
488
00:22:30,863 --> 00:22:32,865
Right? Here?
No, okay. Ha, ha!
489
00:22:33,032 --> 00:22:36,744
Very good, but go ahead, type it in your BlackBerrys,
pencil it in your notebooks.
490
00:22:36,910 --> 00:22:39,204
Orgy.
Orgy.
491
00:22:39,371 --> 00:22:41,498
Orgy.
Orgy.
492
00:22:41,665 --> 00:22:44,668
Orgy.
Orgy. Orgy.
493
00:22:51,257 --> 00:22:54,760
So, Sue, you think this is how you're gonna
finally sleep with Eric?
494
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:58,013
What? We dated in high school.
495
00:22:58,013 --> 00:22:59,556
Come on,
that was ages ago.
496
00:22:59,723 --> 00:23:01,475
You guys never,
you know, did it,
497
00:23:01,641 --> 00:23:03,435
so it's kind of unfinished business.
498
00:23:03,602 --> 00:23:06,938
Yeah, but I've slept with like a ton of guys since then,
499
00:23:07,105 --> 00:23:09,607
so this doesn't have anything to do with it.
500
00:23:09,774 --> 00:23:12,526
Ok fine, but other than social awkwardness,
501
00:23:12,526 --> 00:23:14,028
give me one reason.
502
00:23:14,028 --> 00:23:17,114
Oh, very well.
How about I give you several reasons?
503
00:23:17,281 --> 00:23:18,824
Like, oh,
I don't know,
504
00:23:18,991 --> 00:23:20,659
chlamydia, the herp,
505
00:23:20,826 --> 00:23:24,663
gonorrhea, syphilis, papilloma.
506
00:23:24,829 --> 00:23:26,164
The Steve McQueen movie?
507
00:23:26,331 --> 00:23:27,332
No, that's Papillon.
508
00:23:27,332 --> 00:23:30,001
I'm talking about the virus that causes genital warts.
509
00:23:30,168 --> 00:23:32,336
Ugh.
Why do you think of this stuff?
510
00:23:32,503 --> 00:23:35,506
Don't you guys remember the article my
mom clipped from The New Yorker?
511
00:23:38,258 --> 00:23:39,510
No.
512
00:23:39,676 --> 00:23:42,054
Condoms can't stop it and it causes cervical cancer.
513
00:23:42,220 --> 00:23:44,097
You don't have a cervix.
514
00:23:44,681 --> 00:23:48,393
I don't know how you could have
sex in front of a room full of people.
515
00:23:48,559 --> 00:23:51,687
I mean,
I don't even like to get naked at the spa.
516
00:23:51,854 --> 00:23:54,690
I'm not saying that this is gonna be easy for me,
517
00:23:54,857 --> 00:23:57,818
but isn't that what kind of makes it exciting?
518
00:23:57,985 --> 00:24:00,529
I'm not saying that it wouldn't be fun,
519
00:24:00,696 --> 00:24:02,656
but it's an orgy.
520
00:24:02,823 --> 00:24:04,866
What's the point of losing all this weight
521
00:24:05,033 --> 00:24:06,993
if you're not gonna show off your new bod?
522
00:24:06,993 --> 00:24:09,078
I mean, You haven't even worn your bikini yet.
523
00:24:09,078 --> 00:24:10,496
I still have 5 more pounds.
524
00:24:10,663 --> 00:24:13,499
I just think this really could help build your self-esteem.
525
00:24:13,666 --> 00:24:19,087
There's the miracle cure. I'm gonna start turning
my clients onto group sex instead of Zoloft.
526
00:24:19,254 --> 00:24:21,465
We're going to the beach.
At least do that.
527
00:24:21,631 --> 00:24:22,632
C'mon. It's our last summer.
528
00:24:22,632 --> 00:24:23,675
Let's go to the beach.
529
00:24:23,341 --> 00:24:24,009
You know what?
530
00:24:24,009 --> 00:24:27,345
Shockingly, I'm gonna pass on the
stroll through the tick-infested dunes.
531
00:24:28,012 --> 00:24:29,514
Dude, I've had Lyme disease.
532
00:24:29,681 --> 00:24:32,183
It's not a big deal.
It's antibiotics, boom, done.
533
00:24:32,350 --> 00:24:35,561
You know I have a needle phobia.
Okay? I can't go to the doctor.
534
00:24:35,728 --> 00:24:38,355
The puncturing the veins and the... Ugh.
535
00:24:38,522 --> 00:24:40,983
Okay, whatever.
Enjoy the great indoors.
536
00:24:41,149 --> 00:24:43,318
Yeah. Bye.
537
00:24:43,485 --> 00:24:46,821
Ooh, hey, Eric.
Uh, could you grab some sand for my ass crack?
538
00:24:46,988 --> 00:24:48,531
I'll grab some for your cervix.
539
00:24:50,658 --> 00:24:52,994
Okay.
Let's say you dated four guys in one year,
540
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:55,162
right, and you slept with them.
541
00:24:55,329 --> 00:24:56,413
You'd be cool with that?
542
00:24:56,413 --> 00:24:57,498
Totally.
543
00:24:57,664 --> 00:25:00,709
And how many guys have you slept with this year?
544
00:25:01,501 --> 00:25:03,503
None.
545
00:25:03,670 --> 00:25:05,046
Or the year before.
546
00:25:05,213 --> 00:25:08,549
So really all you're doing is sleeping with four guys
547
00:25:08,716 --> 00:25:11,093
in, like,
a shorter time frame.
548
00:25:12,219 --> 00:25:14,388
I never really thought of it that way.
549
00:25:15,556 --> 00:25:16,599
What do you think?
550
00:25:16,765 --> 00:25:19,893
Insane, idiotic and self-destructive.
551
00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:26,024
Okay, hypothetically.
552
00:25:24,022 --> 00:25:28,151
If I did decide to do it, but at the last minute,
553
00:25:28,151 --> 00:25:30,278
I totally freaked out,
554
00:25:30,445 --> 00:25:33,406
they would let me out, right?
555
00:25:33,572 --> 00:25:35,824
Laura, it's an orgy,
not The Accused.
556
00:25:35,991 --> 00:25:39,077
It's not fun unless everybody's into it.
557
00:25:41,455 --> 00:25:43,081
I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna do it.
558
00:25:43,248 --> 00:25:44,374
I'm gonna do it.
559
00:25:44,374 --> 00:25:45,500
Yeah? Yeah?
560
00:25:45,667 --> 00:25:46,668
I'm gonna do it.
561
00:25:46,668 --> 00:25:47,710
All right. Yeah, girl.
562
00:25:47,877 --> 00:25:50,046
Hey, guys,
what's the celebration?
563
00:25:52,006 --> 00:25:54,675
Just talking about how to get Laura back in the saddle.
564
00:25:54,842 --> 00:25:57,428
Whoo, yay!
I'm gonna find you a guy.
565
00:25:57,970 --> 00:26:00,347
Glenn's cousin Frank is coming to the wedding.
566
00:26:04,309 --> 00:26:06,311
Okay, Game on.
Let's go.
567
00:26:06,478 --> 00:26:07,645
All right,
John Kruk.
568
00:26:07,812 --> 00:26:11,274
I'll tell you what I'm gonna throw,
and you're still gonna whiff at it.
569
00:26:11,482 --> 00:26:14,151
Slow breaking curveball.
570
00:26:15,152 --> 00:26:16,195
Oh!
571
00:26:16,362 --> 00:26:18,363
Goddamn it!
I dare you to throw that shit again.
572
00:26:18,530 --> 00:26:21,491
Swish full,
the nerd's revenge.
573
00:26:21,658 --> 00:26:23,577
Ooh, I got my bunt face on.
574
00:26:23,577 --> 00:26:26,204
Drills, ladies. Drills. Let's go. Look alive.
575
00:26:26,204 --> 00:26:27,539
Album cover,
hat or no hat?
576
00:26:27,705 --> 00:26:29,665
Oh, Doug,
come on, man.
577
00:26:29,832 --> 00:26:31,709
You've been doing this for two years.
578
00:26:31,876 --> 00:26:34,336
Mixing, remixing.
Hatting, no hatting.
579
00:26:34,503 --> 00:26:36,630
Your music's awesome.
You just get it out there.
580
00:26:36,797 --> 00:26:40,592
No one will give it a shot if they don't dig my look.
It's an image-based industry.
581
00:26:40,759 --> 00:26:44,137
What the fuck?
This is exactly why you're headed for a shitty job.
582
00:26:44,304 --> 00:26:47,807
You need to stop trying to look like
a rock star and start fucking living like one.
583
00:26:47,974 --> 00:26:48,683
Yeah, do the orgy.
584
00:26:48,683 --> 00:26:49,392
Do the orgy.
585
00:26:49,559 --> 00:26:51,018
You think Mick Jagger would have said,
586
00:26:51,185 --> 00:26:53,229
'No thanks, mate. No orgy for me.
587
00:26:53,229 --> 00:26:55,231
I've got an on-again-off-again girlfriend.'
588
00:26:55,231 --> 00:26:57,358
'I don't wanna cheat on David Bowie.'
589
00:26:57,524 --> 00:26:58,567
'No cheating on Bowie.'
590
00:26:58,567 --> 00:26:59,651
Hey, Willow.
591
00:27:01,069 --> 00:27:02,737
I know what Tom Hanks feels like now.
592
00:27:02,904 --> 00:27:04,823
See, my only concern, Duque,
593
00:27:04,990 --> 00:27:07,325
is that the hat maybe doesn't make you look gay enough.
594
00:27:07,492 --> 00:27:08,660
Oh, yeah.
595
00:27:08,826 --> 00:27:11,412
You could Photoshop in three guys jizzing on your face?
596
00:27:11,579 --> 00:27:13,998
Or on the hat?
Ooh, ooh.
597
00:27:14,165 --> 00:27:15,374
That's good.
598
00:27:15,541 --> 00:27:16,542
You know, you could do,
599
00:27:16,542 --> 00:27:18,627
You could take that five-song demo,
maybe, make it a double album.
600
00:27:18,627 --> 00:27:20,003
One with the hat, one without it?
601
00:27:20,003 --> 00:27:21,129
Yeah, that's good idea.
602
00:27:21,129 --> 00:27:22,506
You could call it Exile on Hat Street.
603
00:27:22,506 --> 00:27:24,215
Yeah, or Jagged Little Hat?
604
00:27:24,215 --> 00:27:25,842
Oh, Meat Loaf. Hat Outta Hell.
605
00:27:25,842 --> 00:27:28,928
What about Sgt. Pepper's
Lonely Hats Club Hat?
606
00:27:29,220 --> 00:27:30,221
What about just called it,
607
00:27:30,721 --> 00:27:32,431
"My shitty friends don't respect me?"
608
00:27:33,641 --> 00:27:34,725
Pretty Indie.
609
00:27:34,725 --> 00:27:35,809
I think, you won't be able to sell at Walmart.
610
00:27:35,976 --> 00:27:37,478
Alright, who's next up to hat?
611
00:27:37,478 --> 00:27:39,021
Two and two to Harvey Key.
612
00:27:39,188 --> 00:27:41,815
Sandy winds up and delivers.
613
00:27:44,234 --> 00:27:46,319
Fuck me!
614
00:27:45,026 --> 00:27:46,027
Hey, Ali Cat.
615
00:27:46,027 --> 00:27:46,486
Hi.
616
00:27:46,653 --> 00:27:47,862
Like what you see?
617
00:27:48,029 --> 00:27:50,073
This could be all yours Labor Day weekend.
618
00:27:50,239 --> 00:27:51,991
Oh, Eric.
619
00:27:52,158 --> 00:27:53,909
Do you mind if I make an observation?
620
00:27:54,076 --> 00:27:57,037
Oh, boy.
Sure, go ahead.
621
00:27:57,204 --> 00:27:59,164
You have intimacy issues.
622
00:27:59,289 --> 00:27:59,873
Really?
623
00:27:59,873 --> 00:28:00,499
Yeah.
624
00:28:00,666 --> 00:28:03,001
I figured an orgy is as intimate as it can get.
625
00:28:03,168 --> 00:28:06,004
No, no, no,
but intimacy isn't about intercourse, Eric.
626
00:28:06,171 --> 00:28:06,963
It's about emotion.
627
00:28:06,963 --> 00:28:07,422
Mm-hm.
628
00:28:07,589 --> 00:28:10,383
You don't need to get laid.
You need to be in a relationship.
629
00:28:12,426 --> 00:28:15,846
Look, just because you're in an unhappy
relationship,
630
00:28:15,971 --> 00:28:18,390
doesn't mean the rest of us need to be.
631
00:28:17,181 --> 00:28:19,600
I'm not in an unhappy relationship.
632
00:28:19,308 --> 00:28:22,185
I'm in an adult relationship.
633
00:28:22,352 --> 00:28:23,311
It's lot a fun, whatever it is.
634
00:28:23,812 --> 00:28:24,813
Hold on one sec?
635
00:28:24,479 --> 00:28:27,524
Say, hey, Marcus.
You want to take a few cracks with the bat?
636
00:28:27,690 --> 00:28:28,691
No, thank you.
637
00:28:29,067 --> 00:28:32,361
Football is my game, European football.
638
00:28:32,361 --> 00:28:33,612
Gotcha.
639
00:28:33,779 --> 00:28:36,031
Did he date Siegfried or Roy?
I can't remember.
640
00:28:38,659 --> 00:28:41,411
God, it's embarrassing watching you play this sport.
641
00:28:41,578 --> 00:28:44,372
Aww, it's cow shit.
642
00:28:44,497 --> 00:28:47,375
Look, doc,
it's your life.
643
00:28:47,500 --> 00:28:48,918
You can do whatever you want.
644
00:28:49,043 --> 00:28:51,337
All I'm saying is that maybe Labor Day weekend
645
00:28:51,504 --> 00:28:53,798
might be the last chopper out of Saigon for you.
646
00:29:02,139 --> 00:29:04,432
Knock, knock.
Guess who.
647
00:29:04,599 --> 00:29:05,892
Dody!
648
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:08,686
These are the Webers.
649
00:29:08,686 --> 00:29:09,854
How you doing?
650
00:29:09,771 --> 00:29:11,272
We brought some extra signs
651
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,190
because someone is stealing ours.
652
00:29:13,232 --> 00:29:14,900
Oh. That's too bad.
653
00:29:15,776 --> 00:29:17,569
Oh, good. Okay.
654
00:29:17,569 --> 00:29:19,279
Hey, guys. Would you do me a favor?
655
00:29:19,446 --> 00:29:20,239
When you go in the house,
656
00:29:20,239 --> 00:29:21,531
don't go to the basement or anything.
657
00:29:21,865 --> 00:29:26,035
Not that there's anything or anyone
down there in a cage or otherwise.
658
00:29:26,202 --> 00:29:29,205
Thanks, Eric.
That's so helpful.
659
00:29:29,372 --> 00:29:30,540
What is he talking about?
660
00:29:30,665 --> 00:29:33,542
Oh, gosh. Don't worry.
Don't worry.
661
00:29:33,709 --> 00:29:37,004
He's a little off.
662
00:29:37,171 --> 00:29:38,422
It's a head injury.
663
00:29:38,589 --> 00:29:40,674
That's why he wears the helmet.
664
00:29:40,841 --> 00:29:43,343
Are they all challenged?
665
00:29:44,010 --> 00:29:46,513
Yes.
But at least they have each other.
666
00:29:46,638 --> 00:29:49,849
Oh, that's so great.
667
00:29:50,016 --> 00:29:52,560
Have fun with your game, sweetie.
668
00:29:52,727 --> 00:29:54,186
Thanks, Mrs. Weber.
669
00:29:55,479 --> 00:29:58,732
We are five minutes from Indian Wells Beach.
670
00:29:58,899 --> 00:30:01,109
And wait till you see your bedroom.
671
00:30:39,353 --> 00:30:41,855
What if someone comes in?
These people never knock.
672
00:30:42,022 --> 00:30:44,441
I just locked the door.
673
00:30:44,608 --> 00:30:48,444
Fine, but you really must be quiet.
674
00:30:48,611 --> 00:30:49,946
None of your usual screeches.
675
00:30:50,113 --> 00:30:50,905
Okay, okay, okay.
676
00:30:50,905 --> 00:30:51,697
Yes?
677
00:30:51,864 --> 00:30:53,908
Yeah.
678
00:30:56,285 --> 00:30:58,829
Oh, Marcus.
Oh...
679
00:30:58,996 --> 00:31:01,498
Let's get you out of these dirty little panties.
680
00:31:01,665 --> 00:31:03,667
Do it.
What?
681
00:31:03,792 --> 00:31:07,170
What's going on? Why are you stopping?
What's going on? Hey.
682
00:31:07,337 --> 00:31:08,838
What?
683
00:31:09,505 --> 00:31:11,048
What have you done to your vagina?
684
00:31:12,675 --> 00:31:13,843
I shaved it.
685
00:31:19,848 --> 00:31:21,266
Why?
686
00:31:21,266 --> 00:31:22,726
I don't know.
687
00:31:22,893 --> 00:31:27,397
Because I thought it would be something different, sexy.
688
00:31:27,564 --> 00:31:31,150
Women are supposed to have pubic hair.
Why would I find it sexy?
689
00:31:31,317 --> 00:31:33,402
You look like a prepubescent girl.
690
00:31:33,569 --> 00:31:34,945
I'm not a child molester.
691
00:31:35,112 --> 00:31:38,157
Okay, you know what, it's hair, Marcus,
and it's gonna grow back.
692
00:31:39,491 --> 00:31:41,743
Well, I wished you would have told me
693
00:31:41,910 --> 00:31:44,412
about your little secret before I unwrapped this.
694
00:31:44,579 --> 00:31:46,998
This lambskin condoms cost 2 Euros.
695
00:31:47,165 --> 00:31:48,833
It's wasteful.
696
00:31:49,876 --> 00:31:51,043
I did it for you!
697
00:31:51,210 --> 00:31:53,170
You could have consulted with me.
698
00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:59,843
Alison, you're being like a child.
699
00:31:59,968 --> 00:32:02,429
Fuck you,
go away!
700
00:32:02,596 --> 00:32:04,514
You go away.
701
00:32:04,681 --> 00:32:06,015
I think this is chemical.
702
00:32:06,182 --> 00:32:08,017
Darling, what dosage are you taking?
703
00:32:08,184 --> 00:32:10,353
You... Fuck you!
704
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:11,854
This is your problem.
705
00:32:12,021 --> 00:32:15,441
I was just expressing my sexuality in a healthy manner.
706
00:32:15,608 --> 00:32:19,486
God forbid, Marcus,
that we experiment a little bit.
707
00:32:19,653 --> 00:32:20,904
Fine.
708
00:32:21,071 --> 00:32:24,991
I'm going back to the city and I'm taking the iPod.
709
00:32:24,991 --> 00:32:27,577
Fine. Leave!
710
00:32:27,577 --> 00:32:29,871
And your breath is terrible!
711
00:32:30,037 --> 00:32:33,040
My breath is natural.
Unlike your vagina.
712
00:32:33,999 --> 00:32:35,543
Fuck you!
713
00:32:41,673 --> 00:32:44,092
Oh. Jesus.
714
00:32:45,010 --> 00:32:46,010
Sorry.
715
00:32:47,762 --> 00:32:48,972
It's all right.
716
00:32:52,183 --> 00:32:54,602
The worst part is I'm just peeing right now.
717
00:33:11,242 --> 00:33:12,952
I've been kicking around a few ideas.
718
00:33:13,119 --> 00:33:14,203
Themes for the party.
719
00:33:14,203 --> 00:33:15,204
Let me know what you think.
720
00:33:15,204 --> 00:33:16,914
First one, Roman, right?
721
00:33:16,914 --> 00:33:18,624
You're talking togas, wine,
722
00:33:18,624 --> 00:33:20,834
bushels of grapes,
the whole deal.
723
00:33:21,001 --> 00:33:22,878
Then I also have '70s, right?
724
00:33:23,044 --> 00:33:26,506
We got the swinger vibe, polyester,
big hair,
725
00:33:26,673 --> 00:33:29,509
upstairs and down,
you know? Um, I don't know.
726
00:33:29,675 --> 00:33:32,094
What about the Kama Sutra?
727
00:33:32,261 --> 00:33:32,970
That's actually not bad.
728
00:33:32,970 --> 00:33:33,679
Yeah?
729
00:33:33,846 --> 00:33:36,557
Yeah, yeah,
like the sex secrets of the East, right?
730
00:33:36,724 --> 00:33:37,683
Mm-hm.
731
00:33:37,683 --> 00:33:38,684
Oh, that's... Yeah.
732
00:33:38,851 --> 00:33:42,604
You know you have like, uh, incense, tapestries.
733
00:33:42,771 --> 00:33:44,939
Veils, diaphanous fabrics.
734
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:48,192
I have no idea what the hell that is,
but I like it.
735
00:33:48,359 --> 00:33:50,528
You and me,
we're on the same page with this think.
736
00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:51,862
Right? I think so.
737
00:33:51,862 --> 00:33:53,030
Absolutely.
738
00:33:53,197 --> 00:33:55,366
How do you spell 'Kama'?
739
00:33:55,533 --> 00:33:56,992
Dude, babe alert at 3 o'clock.
740
00:33:57,159 --> 00:33:58,994
Three o'clock.
My 3, my 3.
741
00:34:04,165 --> 00:34:04,749
Wait a minute.
742
00:34:04,749 --> 00:34:05,333
That hurls my dink.
743
00:34:05,500 --> 00:34:06,835
Wait a minute. That's Kelly.
744
00:34:06,835 --> 00:34:08,211
Who?
745
00:34:08,211 --> 00:34:09,629
My Realtor.
746
00:34:09,629 --> 00:34:11,214
Oh, shit,
the enemy.
747
00:34:11,881 --> 00:34:13,591
Listen to me.
Listen.
748
00:34:13,758 --> 00:34:16,677
We cannot afford to lose the casa
de sex before Labor Day, okay?
749
00:34:16,844 --> 00:34:19,763
You go over there,
you get in tight with her, lay on the charm,
750
00:34:19,930 --> 00:34:21,848
and get her to drag ass selling the house.
751
00:34:22,015 --> 00:34:23,308
No, no,
that is... Yes, yes.
752
00:34:23,475 --> 00:34:25,769
She is a tough cookie.
She'll see through that.
753
00:34:25,935 --> 00:34:27,896
Her? Please, dude,
you're the king.
754
00:34:28,062 --> 00:34:31,357
A little winey-diney,
she'll be your humble wench servant.
755
00:34:32,316 --> 00:34:34,318
Keep friends close,
but enemies closer.
756
00:34:34,485 --> 00:34:37,780
Yeah. That doesn't make any sense.
Just go fucking charm her, okay?
757
00:34:38,113 --> 00:34:39,489
Okay.
Go, go, go.
758
00:34:39,656 --> 00:34:40,907
All right.
Do the thing.
759
00:34:41,074 --> 00:34:44,327
What? The smile thing.
Ahem.
760
00:34:45,328 --> 00:34:46,913
Kelly. Kelly.
761
00:34:46,913 --> 00:34:48,498
Hi. Oh, Eric.
762
00:34:50,208 --> 00:34:51,918
Oh, my God,
look at this. Watch.
763
00:34:52,084 --> 00:34:55,129
I hope anything I said didn't
screw anything up with the client.
764
00:34:55,296 --> 00:34:57,423
I was joking around.
I didn't freak them out?
765
00:34:57,589 --> 00:34:58,423
Oh, no. Not at all.
766
00:34:58,423 --> 00:34:59,258
Oh, good.
767
00:34:59,424 --> 00:35:02,135
You were wearing that helmet
so I was able to convince them
768
00:35:02,302 --> 00:35:05,138
that, you know,
you ride the short bus.
769
00:35:06,097 --> 00:35:07,765
Well, that's good.
770
00:35:07,932 --> 00:35:09,350
Well played.
771
00:35:08,683 --> 00:35:11,018
Hey, do you mind if...?
Maybe I can make up to you.
772
00:35:11,185 --> 00:35:12,979
Take you out to dinner or something?
773
00:35:13,145 --> 00:35:14,063
Could be fun, yeah?
774
00:35:14,063 --> 00:35:15,022
Oh, gosh, thanks.
775
00:35:15,189 --> 00:35:19,318
Um, technically,
I'm not supposed to go out with clients so..
776
00:35:19,484 --> 00:35:22,404
Well, technically my dad's the client.
777
00:35:22,571 --> 00:35:25,407
Right now I'm just some random dude on the beach.
778
00:35:25,573 --> 00:35:28,076
She's smiling. Look, she's smiling.
She's buying it.
779
00:35:28,076 --> 00:35:30,745
Okay. I'll go to dinner with you.
780
00:35:30,745 --> 00:35:31,829
All right.
781
00:35:31,996 --> 00:35:34,165
But, tell me which party we met at.
782
00:35:34,331 --> 00:35:35,416
Was it one of my parties?
783
00:35:35,416 --> 00:35:36,500
Mm-hm.
784
00:35:36,667 --> 00:35:38,293
Okay.
What, um...
785
00:35:38,460 --> 00:35:40,837
Oh, was it the Cuba Libre party because
786
00:35:41,004 --> 00:35:43,215
I was in mojito haze that whole day and I just...
787
00:35:43,381 --> 00:35:44,758
Nope.
788
00:35:44,924 --> 00:35:46,259
Oktoberfest in July?
789
00:35:46,384 --> 00:35:47,343
Nope.
790
00:35:47,343 --> 00:35:48,303
Oh, oh, no, no, I know.
791
00:35:48,469 --> 00:35:49,554
I know.
792
00:35:49,721 --> 00:35:52,974
Uh, it was the Shir Trek versus Shir
Wars Battle for the Universe Party
793
00:35:53,140 --> 00:35:55,976
and you were dressed as Obi-Wan Kenobi.
794
00:35:56,143 --> 00:35:58,479
How drunk do you get at these parties?
795
00:35:58,645 --> 00:36:01,481
Uh, pretty drunk.
It's kind of a social obligation.
796
00:36:01,648 --> 00:36:04,234
Okay.
I'm gonna give you a hint.
797
00:36:04,401 --> 00:36:05,985
I wear a size 9 shoe.
798
00:36:07,737 --> 00:36:09,447
Oh, my God.
799
00:36:09,614 --> 00:36:11,657
Oh, my God,
you're bean dip girl.
800
00:36:11,824 --> 00:36:12,825
You're bean dip girl?
801
00:36:13,242 --> 00:36:14,243
I am.
802
00:36:13,951 --> 00:36:16,078
Have you been bean dip girl the whole time?
803
00:36:16,245 --> 00:36:18,413
Oh, he's so good.
804
00:36:18,580 --> 00:36:20,666
I can't believe that.
I was gonna call you.
805
00:36:20,832 --> 00:36:22,167
I had your number on my hand
806
00:36:22,334 --> 00:36:24,210
and I jumped in the pool and it was gone.
807
00:36:24,377 --> 00:36:26,880
I thought I lost you.
I thought you were gone forever.
808
00:36:27,046 --> 00:36:28,214
And you...
809
00:36:28,381 --> 00:36:30,550
You look so much better without the fake baby.
810
00:36:30,716 --> 00:36:32,301
I actually prefer the mullet.
811
00:36:32,468 --> 00:36:33,803
Oh, I just cut it yesterday.
812
00:36:33,969 --> 00:36:35,179
Oh.
For work.
813
00:36:35,346 --> 00:36:38,348
Don't think this whole funny,
charming thing right now
814
00:36:38,515 --> 00:36:40,309
gets you off for stealing my signs.
815
00:36:40,475 --> 00:36:42,602
I don't know what you're talking about.
816
00:36:42,769 --> 00:36:44,688
I'm furious those signs are gone.
817
00:36:44,854 --> 00:36:46,314
You're lying.
I'm not lying.
818
00:36:46,481 --> 00:36:48,149
Your voice just went up.
What?
819
00:36:48,858 --> 00:36:50,151
I'm a ...
820
00:36:50,151 --> 00:36:52,820
I'm not lying. I am not lying.
821
00:36:52,820 --> 00:36:53,529
You're so lying.
822
00:36:53,529 --> 00:36:54,238
No, I'm not.
823
00:36:54,405 --> 00:36:56,282
Fucking James Bond.
Fuck.
824
00:36:57,658 --> 00:37:00,702
Wow, look at that, huh?
825
00:37:00,869 --> 00:37:03,997
Holy smokes.
Another gorgeous shot.
826
00:37:04,164 --> 00:37:05,373
Yeah, thanks.
827
00:37:06,916 --> 00:37:09,502
What should I use,
pitching wedge or nine?
828
00:37:09,627 --> 00:37:11,796
I used the nine.
829
00:37:12,129 --> 00:37:14,423
I think maybe I should use the wedge.
830
00:37:14,590 --> 00:37:16,008
Or use the wedge.
831
00:37:19,261 --> 00:37:21,304
Ugh!
Why am I like this?
832
00:37:21,471 --> 00:37:24,683
Oh, just pick a club and hit it.
What is the big deal?
833
00:37:25,809 --> 00:37:27,560
Will you do the orgy with me?
834
00:37:29,103 --> 00:37:30,605
Hey, can we play through?
835
00:37:30,771 --> 00:37:31,856
Hold on a second, man.
836
00:37:35,359 --> 00:37:36,568
The orgy
837
00:37:36,735 --> 00:37:38,862
You think that would be a good idea?
838
00:37:40,489 --> 00:37:43,283
I'm stuck.
And I think the reason is
839
00:37:43,283 --> 00:37:45,618
is because I feel like a fucking fraud.
840
00:37:45,744 --> 00:37:49,205
I'm not cool.
I have a law degree.
841
00:37:49,330 --> 00:37:52,750
I ride a motorcycle and it scares the fucking shit out of me.
842
00:37:52,875 --> 00:37:55,336
And I play golf at my mom's fucking country club
843
00:37:56,045 --> 00:37:57,671
with assholes like this.
844
00:37:57,796 --> 00:38:00,507
What's the holdup?
Play the wedge!
845
00:38:00,966 --> 00:38:03,134
This is not rock'n'roll.
846
00:38:04,469 --> 00:38:06,930
This could be really good for me.
847
00:38:07,055 --> 00:38:09,098
For me and for us.
848
00:38:09,724 --> 00:38:11,976
Will you do the orgy with me?
849
00:38:14,770 --> 00:38:16,939
Sure, yeah, yeah, whatever. Yeah.
850
00:38:17,940 --> 00:38:19,274
Really?
851
00:38:20,150 --> 00:38:22,527
Holy shit.
Yeah.
852
00:38:24,195 --> 00:38:27,282
If you're sure this is what you want.
853
00:38:27,407 --> 00:38:30,118
Yeah, absolutely.
854
00:38:30,243 --> 00:38:31,369
Good.
855
00:38:31,369 --> 00:38:32,453
I think.
856
00:38:32,578 --> 00:38:34,705
Fore!
857
00:38:42,295 --> 00:38:44,756
So you wanna know why guys don't get as excited
858
00:38:44,881 --> 00:38:47,425
about their wedding as women do?
859
00:38:47,550 --> 00:38:51,095
See, it used to be like a guy would get
rewarded for his commitment with sex.
860
00:38:51,220 --> 00:38:53,931
But you and Glenn have had sex like a billion times.
861
00:38:54,056 --> 00:38:56,433
For God's sake,
you guys have a kid together.
862
00:38:56,558 --> 00:39:02,147
So for Glenn,
it's just kind of like all commitment, no reward.
863
00:39:02,272 --> 00:39:03,773
You know?
864
00:39:04,357 --> 00:39:06,985
I'm the fucking reward.
865
00:39:07,110 --> 00:39:08,778
Of course you are.
Of course.
866
00:39:11,155 --> 00:39:13,324
Something's wrong.
He's never late.
867
00:39:13,449 --> 00:39:15,492
Try him again.
I have been trying him.
868
00:39:15,618 --> 00:39:17,077
He's not answering his phone.
869
00:39:17,202 --> 00:39:19,830
At least he won't wear a white tuxedo like you dickheads.
870
00:39:20,539 --> 00:39:22,624
Oh, God,
that's good.
871
00:39:26,169 --> 00:39:27,587
Oh, sweet Lord in heaven.
872
00:39:27,712 --> 00:39:29,380
What the fuck,
are you stoned?
873
00:39:29,505 --> 00:39:31,757
No.
No, no, no, better.
874
00:39:31,882 --> 00:39:34,552
I'm wearing a thing called The Yank.
From Adam & Eve catalogues.
875
00:39:34,677 --> 00:39:37,596
One end straps around your leg,
the other end around your Wang.
876
00:39:37,721 --> 00:39:41,725
The brochure says, 'With every stride,
it gives your member a gentle tug.'
877
00:39:43,059 --> 00:39:45,937
What are you doing with a rope
on your cock at my wedding?
878
00:39:46,062 --> 00:39:48,022
Endurance training,
Labor Day.
879
00:39:48,940 --> 00:39:49,357
For what?
880
00:39:49,357 --> 00:39:50,650
A jack-off marathon?
881
00:39:51,776 --> 00:39:54,028
What?
Uh, yeah.
882
00:39:54,153 --> 00:39:56,822
That's exactly it.
You nailed it. Heh, heh.
883
00:39:56,947 --> 00:39:58,657
Hey, check it out.
Look who's here.
884
00:39:58,782 --> 00:40:01,618
Oh, fantastic.
Another asshole in white tails.
885
00:40:01,743 --> 00:40:04,079
Keep the change, man.
886
00:40:05,163 --> 00:40:06,915
Ha-ha-ha.
Oh, my God.
887
00:40:08,249 --> 00:40:09,751
Well, well, well.
Look at you.
888
00:40:09,876 --> 00:40:13,462
You're late, you're in costume,
and you appear to be hammered.
889
00:40:13,587 --> 00:40:14,797
Who the hell are you?
890
00:40:14,922 --> 00:40:17,091
Long story.
I got fired.
891
00:40:17,216 --> 00:40:18,425
What?
892
00:40:18,550 --> 00:40:22,095
It had more to do with the fact that I
almost blew a $2 billion merger deal
893
00:40:22,220 --> 00:40:25,640
because some bozo jumped into the pool
with my blackberry.
894
00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:27,517
Oh, shit. Dude.
895
00:40:27,517 --> 00:40:29,602
I spent most of last night crying and drinking
896
00:40:29,727 --> 00:40:33,606
and then I drunk-dialed my mom.
She kind of talked me down.
897
00:40:33,731 --> 00:40:35,441
Then I woke up this morning,
898
00:40:35,566 --> 00:40:38,735
had a little more to drink and I realized,
you know what?
899
00:40:38,861 --> 00:40:40,946
This is good.
I'm free.
900
00:40:41,071 --> 00:40:42,405
Adam, I'm so sorry.
901
00:40:42,531 --> 00:40:44,491
Shh, shh, shush.
You're my friend.
902
00:40:44,616 --> 00:40:46,576
No, they took my twenties from me.
903
00:40:46,701 --> 00:40:49,787
And I plan to make my thirties making up for it.
904
00:40:49,912 --> 00:40:51,581
And you know what else?
905
00:40:51,581 --> 00:40:54,834
I'm doing the orgy. Fuck it.
906
00:40:54,834 --> 00:40:55,918
Orgy?
907
00:40:56,043 --> 00:40:57,669
What orgy?
908
00:40:57,795 --> 00:40:59,463
The fuck are you talking about?
909
00:40:59,463 --> 00:41:02,466
See, this is exactly why we should have told him, Eric.
910
00:41:02,466 --> 00:41:03,800
Told me what?
911
00:41:03,925 --> 00:41:06,094
That's what we're doing for Labor Day.
An orgy.
912
00:41:06,219 --> 00:41:08,846
Bullshit.
Who's having an orgy?
913
00:41:08,971 --> 00:41:11,307
It's me, Willow,
these two fellas,
914
00:41:11,432 --> 00:41:13,809
Laura, Sue,
now drunkie.
915
00:41:13,934 --> 00:41:15,102
Waiting on Alison.
916
00:41:15,227 --> 00:41:17,271
Jesus H.
Fucking Christ.
917
00:41:17,354 --> 00:41:20,274
How come you cocksuckers didn't
think of this fucking orgy idea
918
00:41:20,399 --> 00:41:22,734
five fucking years ago?
God damn it!
919
00:41:22,859 --> 00:41:24,944
Ahem.
Uh, Glenn.
920
00:41:25,070 --> 00:41:27,780
I'm afraid we're gonna have to start without your friend.
921
00:41:27,906 --> 00:41:29,198
Oh, he's here.
He's, uh...
922
00:41:29,490 --> 00:41:30,408
Hi, Rabbi.
923
00:41:31,867 --> 00:41:33,285
Pardon my French.
924
00:41:37,498 --> 00:41:38,707
All right, everybody.
925
00:41:38,707 --> 00:41:41,501
Introducing for the very first time,
926
00:41:41,501 --> 00:41:43,962
Mr. and Mrs. Glenn Pasillio.
927
00:41:45,422 --> 00:41:46,965
Paciello!
928
00:41:46,965 --> 00:41:48,508
Paciellio.
929
00:41:54,889 --> 00:41:56,056
Here we go.
930
00:41:57,891 --> 00:41:59,101
I am married.
931
00:42:04,731 --> 00:42:09,527
I can't believe that you guys broke up because you shaved.
932
00:42:07,525 --> 00:42:09,485
He's the weirdest,
creepiest guy ever.
933
00:42:09,610 --> 00:42:11,320
Here you are, ladies.
934
00:42:11,445 --> 00:42:13,906
You guys are definitely broken up this time, right?
935
00:42:17,201 --> 00:42:18,619
Fuck relationships.
936
00:42:18,744 --> 00:42:22,581
Right now,
all I wanna do is have some fun.
937
00:42:48,646 --> 00:42:50,523
Labor Day.
938
00:42:51,816 --> 00:42:52,900
I'm in.
939
00:42:52,525 --> 00:42:54,401
Yes.
Yes.
940
00:42:54,527 --> 00:42:56,236
Oh, and I'm fully shaved.
941
00:42:58,030 --> 00:42:58,989
Alison!
942
00:42:58,989 --> 00:42:59,907
Oh, no, no, no.
943
00:43:00,032 --> 00:43:02,075
I'm not making a speech.
944
00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:05,412
Sorry about that. It's, uh,
private conversation.
945
00:43:08,581 --> 00:43:12,084
You know what they're doing over Labor Day?
Do you know what the party is?
946
00:43:12,209 --> 00:43:13,335
What?
947
00:43:13,461 --> 00:43:15,921
They're having a fucking orgy.
948
00:43:17,047 --> 00:43:19,299
What are you talking about?
949
00:43:18,423 --> 00:43:21,009
They are having an orgy.
950
00:43:21,802 --> 00:43:22,969
Like a sex orgy?
951
00:43:23,094 --> 00:43:25,221
Like a sex orgy and we're not invited.
952
00:43:29,017 --> 00:43:30,434
Hey.
Hi.
953
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:31,978
So is it true?
954
00:43:32,103 --> 00:43:34,355
That all of you are having this orgy
955
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,398
and you didn't think to invite us?
956
00:43:38,525 --> 00:43:41,445
What are you all looking at me for?
I...
957
00:43:41,570 --> 00:43:44,155
Guys, you just got married, okay?
958
00:43:44,281 --> 00:43:46,282
L... You have a kid.
You don't...
959
00:43:46,407 --> 00:43:48,743
Don't you think it's a little inappropriate?
960
00:43:48,868 --> 00:43:50,578
Well, of course we wouldn't come.
961
00:43:50,703 --> 00:43:53,581
It's that you didn't ask us.
You didn't even think of us.
962
00:43:53,706 --> 00:43:56,166
In fact,
you specifically hid this from us.
963
00:43:56,292 --> 00:43:58,293
We invited all you to be here today,
964
00:43:58,418 --> 00:44:00,796
just the most special day of our lives,
965
00:44:00,921 --> 00:44:04,841
and you,
who are supposed to be our closest friends...
966
00:44:04,966 --> 00:44:08,052
There were family members who
didn't get invited so you could come.
967
00:44:08,177 --> 00:44:08,803
Family members.
968
00:44:08,803 --> 00:44:09,387
Right.
969
00:44:10,179 --> 00:44:13,974
Now, we're just totally out of your pervy little social club.
Huh?
970
00:44:15,059 --> 00:44:16,226
I don't believe this.
971
00:44:22,691 --> 00:44:24,901
Sorry.
Are you happy?
972
00:44:26,486 --> 00:44:29,906
Because you and your stupid orgy
just ruined our goddamn wedding.
973
00:44:30,031 --> 00:44:31,073
Oh, come on, Glenn.
974
00:44:31,073 --> 00:44:32,116
Kate!
975
00:44:32,366 --> 00:44:34,076
Is it too late to invite them?
976
00:44:34,076 --> 00:44:34,910
I'll go talk to her.
977
00:44:35,035 --> 00:44:36,120
No!
978
00:44:36,245 --> 00:44:37,204
Are you kidding me?
979
00:44:37,204 --> 00:44:38,205
Guys, it's Katie.
980
00:44:38,330 --> 00:44:39,998
She's gonna be fine in like an hour.
981
00:44:40,832 --> 00:44:42,626
I just realized I'm really hammered
982
00:44:42,042 --> 00:44:44,169
and I would really like to dance.
983
00:44:44,294 --> 00:44:45,670
I'm dancing too.
984
00:44:45,795 --> 00:44:48,589
This reminds me of our senior prom.
985
00:44:48,715 --> 00:44:50,758
You still won't give me a hand job, right?
986
00:45:11,694 --> 00:45:15,823
It's amazing that you're still so
tight with all your high school friends.
987
00:45:15,823 --> 00:45:17,408
None of mine moved back after college.
988
00:45:17,533 --> 00:45:20,410
Yeah, it's a, uh... I don't know,
it's maybe corny to say,
989
00:45:20,535 --> 00:45:22,454
but these guys and gals are kind of like
990
00:45:22,579 --> 00:45:25,123
the closest thing I've got to a family these days.
991
00:45:25,248 --> 00:45:28,459
That's why the house, the summer house,
it's like our rec center.
992
00:45:28,918 --> 00:45:31,212
I think we're getting an offer on the rec center.
993
00:45:32,588 --> 00:45:34,006
My dad will be thrilled.
994
00:45:34,006 --> 00:45:34,715
I knew it.
995
00:45:34,715 --> 00:45:35,424
What?
996
00:45:35,549 --> 00:45:38,010
I knew it wasn't a family decision to sell the house.
997
00:45:38,135 --> 00:45:41,471
No.
We're not big into family decisions any more.
998
00:45:41,596 --> 00:45:43,890
My mom,
she lives in Portland, Oregon,
999
00:45:44,015 --> 00:45:47,185
with this, uh,
Reiki healer asshole.
1000
00:45:47,310 --> 00:45:48,645
Tell me exactly how you feel.
1001
00:45:48,645 --> 00:45:49,979
Oh, he's good. He's good.
1002
00:45:50,104 --> 00:45:52,732
Uh, no,
she's kind of out of the picture.
1003
00:45:52,857 --> 00:45:55,484
Her doing. Um, yeah,
it's just me and my dad.
1004
00:45:55,609 --> 00:45:58,821
Hm, well,
your dad seems like a fun guy.
1005
00:45:59,446 --> 00:46:01,782
Yeah, yeah, he's very fun. He's a hoot.
1006
00:46:01,782 --> 00:46:04,617
Kind of like being raised by an older fraternity brother.
1007
00:46:04,743 --> 00:46:06,035
He hit on me a little bit.
1008
00:46:06,035 --> 00:46:07,328
No.
1009
00:46:07,453 --> 00:46:08,538
He ask you to play golf?
1010
00:46:08,538 --> 00:46:09,622
Yes.
1011
00:46:09,747 --> 00:46:12,083
That's his move.
He's very good at golf. Very good.
1012
00:46:12,208 --> 00:46:15,419
But he did it right in front of Cherie and she had no idea.
1013
00:46:15,544 --> 00:46:17,129
Neither did my mom for a while.
1014
00:46:17,463 --> 00:46:19,423
Now if you will excuse me, Oh.
1015
00:46:19,548 --> 00:46:21,508
I have to win this game if you don't mind.
1016
00:46:21,633 --> 00:46:23,009
Does this make you...?
1017
00:46:23,009 --> 00:46:24,386
It's a little distracting.
1018
00:46:24,511 --> 00:46:25,512
That's not distracting at all.
1019
00:46:25,512 --> 00:46:26,513
Oh! Jesus.
1020
00:46:26,638 --> 00:46:29,015
I lied.
It was a little distracting.
1021
00:46:29,140 --> 00:46:30,349
Help.
1022
00:46:33,227 --> 00:46:36,397
Fred's Beds?
Are you sure this is the right place?
1023
00:46:36,730 --> 00:46:40,484
Yeah. What do you they gonna do,
putting sign on underground sex club?
1024
00:46:41,109 --> 00:46:42,777
He said come in through the warehouse entrance.
1025
00:46:43,612 --> 00:46:44,821
Hey, you got rubbers on you?
1026
00:46:44,946 --> 00:46:45,488
No!
1027
00:46:45,488 --> 00:46:46,030
What?
1028
00:46:46,030 --> 00:46:46,614
No, no, no.
1029
00:46:46,614 --> 00:46:48,157
We are here strictly to observe.
That is all.
1030
00:46:48,283 --> 00:46:50,201
Dude, it's a sex club. Semper fi.
1031
00:46:50,201 --> 00:46:51,953
Always prepared.
You know what I mean?
1032
00:46:51,953 --> 00:46:53,329
Doesn't that mean 'always faithful'?
1033
00:46:53,454 --> 00:46:55,581
Hey, who took Latin in seventh grade?
1034
00:46:55,706 --> 00:46:56,707
Moi, okay?
1035
00:46:57,791 --> 00:47:00,085
I brought a pack with me if you need one.
1036
00:46:59,126 --> 00:47:00,043
Give me the signal.
1037
00:47:00,043 --> 00:47:01,003
I won't need one.
1038
00:47:01,003 --> 00:47:01,586
Altoid?
1039
00:47:01,586 --> 00:47:02,295
Yeah.
1040
00:47:07,300 --> 00:47:08,384
What do you want?
1041
00:47:08,384 --> 00:47:09,802
The password is chandelier.
1042
00:47:13,431 --> 00:47:14,265
Who's your connection?
1043
00:47:14,265 --> 00:47:15,432
Vic George, friend of my uncle's.
1044
00:47:15,432 --> 00:47:17,559
Oh yeah. He told me to expect you.
1045
00:47:17,559 --> 00:47:18,560
Come on in.
1046
00:47:22,522 --> 00:47:25,400
So welcome to the Paradiso.
1047
00:47:29,612 --> 00:47:30,530
What the fuck?
1048
00:47:30,530 --> 00:47:31,948
I, I don't know.
1049
00:47:32,615 --> 00:47:33,616
Can I take your clothes?
1050
00:47:33,616 --> 00:47:34,200
No.
1051
00:47:34,200 --> 00:47:34,825
You sure?
1052
00:47:34,825 --> 00:47:35,451
Good, we're good.
1053
00:47:35,576 --> 00:47:36,285
Okay, follow me.
1054
00:47:36,285 --> 00:47:36,869
Yeah.
1055
00:47:37,870 --> 00:47:38,787
This is Bill.
1056
00:47:40,205 --> 00:47:41,415
That was a panda.
1057
00:47:41,415 --> 00:47:42,791
Go easy on that thing.
1058
00:47:42,791 --> 00:47:44,626
Didi, Ginger.
1059
00:47:46,336 --> 00:47:48,296
Clambake.
1060
00:47:47,795 --> 00:47:49,297
This group right here.
1061
00:47:49,797 --> 00:47:52,842
Get in the swing, rock your world.
1062
00:47:53,009 --> 00:47:53,926
My grandma has that thing.
1063
00:47:54,426 --> 00:47:56,804
You need anything,
just ask for Fred.
1064
00:47:56,804 --> 00:47:57,721
Oh, Fred's Beds?
1065
00:47:57,721 --> 00:47:58,931
Oh no, that's a different Fred.
1066
00:47:58,931 --> 00:48:00,098
I'm a dentist.
1067
00:48:00,307 --> 00:48:03,476
Vic, he is over there in the futon section.
All right?
1068
00:48:02,893 --> 00:48:03,518
Okay.
1069
00:48:03,518 --> 00:48:04,102
Have a good time.
1070
00:48:04,227 --> 00:48:04,769
Thank you.
1071
00:48:04,769 --> 00:48:05,311
Thanks, Dr. Fred.
1072
00:48:06,729 --> 00:48:08,356
Should've had this guy at the wedding.
1073
00:48:10,691 --> 00:48:12,068
Love the new Price is Right.
1074
00:48:13,069 --> 00:48:14,320
There he is, there he is.
1075
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:15,529
Oh my god.
1076
00:48:15,529 --> 00:48:17,364
Hey, Mikey!
1077
00:48:17,448 --> 00:48:18,699
Little McCrudden.
1078
00:48:18,866 --> 00:48:21,451
Holy shit,
you've grown.
1079
00:48:21,451 --> 00:48:22,035
How you doing, baby?
1080
00:48:22,035 --> 00:48:22,577
Good, good.
1081
00:48:24,871 --> 00:48:26,080
How's your folks?
1082
00:48:26,080 --> 00:48:27,290
Good, they're on a cruise
1083
00:48:27,540 --> 00:48:29,167
Mom got her pound cake recipe published.
1084
00:48:29,167 --> 00:48:30,626
This is my buddy Eric.
1085
00:48:30,626 --> 00:48:31,711
Eric, Vic.
1086
00:48:31,669 --> 00:48:33,087
First time at the Paradise, ha? Eh, boys?
1087
00:48:33,879 --> 00:48:36,298
Come on, guys,
take off the clothes and get fucking.
1088
00:48:36,548 --> 00:48:40,218
No. No fucking. No. Actually, no,
no. We're here more doing research
1089
00:48:40,260 --> 00:48:42,512
than anything else.
We're gonna throw an orgy.
1090
00:48:42,554 --> 00:48:44,097
We were hoping we can get a little advice from you.
1091
00:48:44,889 --> 00:48:46,099
Just let me finish up here.
1092
00:48:46,099 --> 00:48:46,891
No rush. Take your time.
1093
00:48:46,891 --> 00:48:47,809
No, you can rush if you want.
1094
00:48:47,809 --> 00:48:48,810
You rush a little.
1095
00:48:49,394 --> 00:48:51,395
Not much longer guys,
Hang in will you.
1096
00:48:53,773 --> 00:48:54,690
Look at me, not her.
1097
00:48:55,191 --> 00:48:55,899
Look at me!
1098
00:48:55,899 --> 00:48:56,900
I'm not gonna look at him.
1099
00:48:57,401 --> 00:48:59,111
Do me a favor,
count me down.
1100
00:49:00,404 --> 00:49:02,405
Five, four, three...
1101
00:49:02,697 --> 00:49:03,281
Go back to 10!
1102
00:49:03,782 --> 00:49:04,783
Ten, nine, eight...
1103
00:49:04,783 --> 00:49:07,493
Oh! Your mom's a good woman.
1104
00:49:08,494 --> 00:49:10,496
You're little early on that one.
1105
00:49:15,417 --> 00:49:17,044
Holy shit,
I got a second one.
1106
00:49:17,503 --> 00:49:20,130
So Vic, we could really use your expertise.
1107
00:49:21,089 --> 00:49:23,133
How do we make sure that the women are into it?
1108
00:49:23,717 --> 00:49:26,845
Don't worry about the women,
worry about you guys.
1109
00:49:27,220 --> 00:49:29,138
Okay, so how do we make it happen, Vic?
1110
00:49:29,597 --> 00:49:31,140
Just because you have a bunch
of naked people in the room
1111
00:49:31,224 --> 00:49:33,350
doesn't mean you're all going to get it on.
1112
00:49:33,726 --> 00:49:35,644
Sometimes a girl just wants to have a heart-to-heart,
1113
00:49:36,312 --> 00:49:37,771
and she ends up pulling a train.
1114
00:49:38,939 --> 00:49:39,940
Pulling a train?
1115
00:49:40,107 --> 00:49:42,442
Mm, yeah, you know.
1116
00:49:49,032 --> 00:49:50,449
Choo-choo train.
1117
00:49:51,117 --> 00:49:52,285
Here's another thing.
1118
00:49:52,326 --> 00:49:54,870
Every wolf pack has a leader.
I take it you're the lead wolf?
1119
00:49:54,870 --> 00:49:55,537
Fucking A.
1120
00:49:55,537 --> 00:49:58,457
Uh, yes. I guess so. Yes.
1121
00:49:59,541 --> 00:50:02,586
Well, then it's all on your shoulders.
1122
00:50:02,627 --> 00:50:05,880
If you don't run,
nobody behind you can run.
1123
00:50:06,339 --> 00:50:07,423
Oh, that's good.
1124
00:50:07,423 --> 00:50:08,466
What does that mean? What do I do?
1125
00:50:08,966 --> 00:50:10,676
You have to get naked.
1126
00:50:12,136 --> 00:50:16,598
You've got get naked in your mind,
in your heart, in your soul.
1127
00:50:17,349 --> 00:50:19,685
You've got be honest with yourself
and everybody else
1128
00:50:19,768 --> 00:50:23,480
about what you want.
If you're a pegger, be honest about that.
1129
00:50:23,980 --> 00:50:25,315
What is a pegger?
1130
00:50:25,857 --> 00:50:27,692
Chick fucks a dude up the ass with a strap-on.
1131
00:50:29,777 --> 00:50:31,988
Not really my bag,
but like I always say,
1132
00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:33,989
I'm willing to try anything twice.
1133
00:50:38,785 --> 00:50:39,536
Hello, senator.
1134
00:50:39,536 --> 00:50:40,329
Hello.
1135
00:50:42,289 --> 00:50:44,207
This is a lot to process.
1136
00:50:45,291 --> 00:50:46,626
You listen to me.
1137
00:50:47,293 --> 00:50:49,837
You can't force it and you can't fake it.
1138
00:50:51,088 --> 00:50:56,218
So you better cut the bullshit,
nut up, and be a man.
1139
00:50:58,887 --> 00:51:00,138
Now if you'll excuse me,
1140
00:51:00,180 --> 00:51:02,724
I feel the blood rushing back to my sword.
1141
00:51:03,516 --> 00:51:04,851
I noticed that.
1142
00:51:06,895 --> 00:51:09,147
Well, hey, Vic, thank you.
This is all good stuff.
1143
00:51:09,397 --> 00:51:10,106
Good advice.
1144
00:51:10,106 --> 00:51:10,857
Yeah. Good.
Thank you.
1145
00:51:11,315 --> 00:51:12,733
My pleasure, guys.
1146
00:51:13,317 --> 00:51:15,027
Oh there, watch that thing.
1147
00:51:15,819 --> 00:51:16,945
Good luck.
1148
00:51:17,905 --> 00:51:20,365
Okay. We should probably leave now.
1149
00:51:21,408 --> 00:51:22,701
Don't eat anything here.
1150
00:51:23,034 --> 00:51:23,577
You son of a bitch.
1151
00:51:23,577 --> 00:51:24,160
Don't!
1152
00:51:30,416 --> 00:51:31,417
Holy shit, is that...?
1153
00:51:31,417 --> 00:51:32,043
Yeah, yeah, keep going.
1154
00:51:32,043 --> 00:51:33,169
Don't let her see you.
1155
00:51:35,212 --> 00:51:37,506
Oh. Man, oh, man. All right.
1156
00:51:37,506 --> 00:51:38,090
That was good?
1157
00:51:38,090 --> 00:51:39,550
That was good.
That was pretty good.
1158
00:51:39,675 --> 00:51:40,842
Yeah, okay,
here we go.
1159
00:51:40,842 --> 00:51:41,426
You ready?
1160
00:51:41,426 --> 00:51:42,427
Showtime.
1161
00:51:45,305 --> 00:51:46,055
Shit!
1162
00:51:46,556 --> 00:51:47,348
I'm gonna count that.
1163
00:51:47,348 --> 00:51:47,932
Okay.
1164
00:51:47,932 --> 00:51:48,808
I'm gonna count that there.
1165
00:51:48,808 --> 00:51:49,475
Okay.
1166
00:51:50,101 --> 00:51:52,645
.. yeah, it's juvenile.
I've been meaning to ask you something.
1167
00:51:52,645 --> 00:51:53,229
What?
1168
00:51:53,229 --> 00:51:55,522
What's Dody like as a boss?
1169
00:51:55,648 --> 00:51:59,318
She just seems like she could be a little,
you know, domineering.
1170
00:51:59,443 --> 00:52:03,238
Oh, my gosh, no. I mean,
she's not what you think, you know.
1171
00:52:03,363 --> 00:52:05,698
I mean, of course,
at work she's all business,
1172
00:52:05,824 --> 00:52:08,159
but, Eric,
she has traveled the world.
1173
00:52:08,284 --> 00:52:10,578
She speaks all these languages.
1174
00:52:10,703 --> 00:52:13,205
She's just full of surprises.
1175
00:52:13,330 --> 00:52:14,915
Oh, I bet she is.
1176
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,167
I bet she's been places I can only imagine.
1177
00:52:17,459 --> 00:52:20,337
So, like,
now that you're super into me...
1178
00:52:21,963 --> 00:52:24,758
No, there's something I actually have to tell you.
1179
00:52:24,883 --> 00:52:25,633
Sincerely I, um...
1180
00:52:25,633 --> 00:52:26,384
Really?
1181
00:52:26,509 --> 00:52:28,511
Yeah, I kind of misled you. Uh...
1182
00:52:28,636 --> 00:52:33,557
What you saw today was not an actual
representation of my Frisbee golf skills.
1183
00:52:33,682 --> 00:52:35,851
Yeah.
I let you win.
1184
00:52:35,976 --> 00:52:36,810
Really?
1185
00:52:36,810 --> 00:52:37,686
Yeah.
1186
00:52:37,811 --> 00:52:39,855
So I want a rematch.
Like, big time.
1187
00:52:40,689 --> 00:52:43,191
Or you could just stick to sucking at pool.
1188
00:52:43,817 --> 00:52:45,360
Ooh.
1189
00:52:45,485 --> 00:52:46,277
Sss!
1190
00:52:46,277 --> 00:52:47,695
Oh.
1191
00:52:52,867 --> 00:52:54,160
One more.
1192
00:52:54,285 --> 00:52:54,827
That's it, though.
1193
00:52:54,827 --> 00:52:55,452
No.
1194
00:52:55,661 --> 00:52:57,788
That was the last one.
That's for the road.
1195
00:52:57,871 --> 00:52:58,997
I will call you.
1196
00:52:59,331 --> 00:53:00,040
Okay.
1197
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:00,874
All right.
1198
00:53:01,291 --> 00:53:02,125
See you!
1199
00:53:02,626 --> 00:53:04,336
Hey! Umm..
1200
00:53:04,627 --> 00:53:07,005
What are you doing for Labor Day?
1201
00:53:08,006 --> 00:53:10,466
Oh, yeah. Is that...?
Yeah, Labor Day.
1202
00:53:10,591 --> 00:53:12,426
Um, you know what?
1203
00:53:12,551 --> 00:53:15,304
The guys and the crew,
we're all gonna, um...
1204
00:53:15,429 --> 00:53:17,347
We're doing this small little thing,
1205
00:53:17,473 --> 00:53:20,017
this intimate little thing.
Nothing... Nothing special.
1206
00:53:20,142 --> 00:53:22,686
Well, I was thinking that maybe,
you know,
1207
00:53:22,811 --> 00:53:25,522
your friends and my friends could get together.
1208
00:53:25,647 --> 00:53:26,940
Yeah.
1209
00:53:27,065 --> 00:53:27,982
Oh, that sounds great.
1210
00:53:27,982 --> 00:53:28,524
Yeah?
1211
00:53:28,650 --> 00:53:30,610
Yeah, we should definitely look into that,
maybe.
1212
00:53:30,735 --> 00:53:32,194
Yeah.
It'd be fun.
1213
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:35,114
But, so, wait, Eric, is that...?
Is that a maybe?
1214
00:53:35,239 --> 00:53:38,367
Yeah, it's a maybe. It's a definite maybe.
It's a hard, hard maybe.
1215
00:53:38,492 --> 00:53:40,577
We should definitely think about doing that.
1216
00:53:40,702 --> 00:53:42,996
Let's lock it in as a possibility.
1217
00:53:43,121 --> 00:53:44,372
Okay.
1218
00:53:44,497 --> 00:53:46,791
I'll call you about it.
1219
00:53:46,791 --> 00:53:48,209
Or write you.
1220
00:53:48,209 --> 00:53:50,086
Heh, okay.
1221
00:53:50,211 --> 00:53:52,213
Carrier pigeon. Something.
I'll get a hold of you.
1222
00:53:52,213 --> 00:53:53,547
Okay, Good night, Eric.
1223
00:53:53,547 --> 00:53:54,423
Good night, Kelly.
1224
00:54:13,399 --> 00:54:14,525
What are you doing up?
1225
00:54:14,525 --> 00:54:15,651
Oh, I never went down.
1226
00:54:15,776 --> 00:54:19,279
Stayed up drinking with a dude from
Blues Traveler in the Talkhouse parking lot.
1227
00:54:19,404 --> 00:54:23,617
Like an hour ago,
fucking dude says the bubonic plague is back.
1228
00:54:23,742 --> 00:54:26,035
Great.
Another thing to worry about.
1229
00:54:27,579 --> 00:54:29,205
What are you doing up?
1230
00:54:29,539 --> 00:54:32,083
I got a bit of a situation.
1231
00:54:32,208 --> 00:54:34,043
Hit me.
1232
00:54:34,168 --> 00:54:37,880
Okay, but first off,
you can't tell anyone.
1233
00:54:38,005 --> 00:54:39,840
Dude, look who you're talking to.
1234
00:54:39,965 --> 00:54:40,841
It's the vault.
1235
00:54:40,841 --> 00:54:41,758
Seriously.
1236
00:54:41,883 --> 00:54:44,302
A lot of people tell people you can't tell someone,
1237
00:54:44,427 --> 00:54:47,388
and those people go and tell someone.
That cannot happen this time.
1238
00:54:47,513 --> 00:54:49,891
Hey!
You tell no one.
1239
00:54:50,016 --> 00:54:51,726
Not even Rodrigo?
1240
00:54:51,851 --> 00:54:55,229
Why would you tell a 50-year-old
Guatemalan landscaper about my life?
1241
00:54:55,354 --> 00:54:57,940
Because he's a good sounding board, okay?
1242
00:54:58,065 --> 00:55:01,276
But if you're gonna get all weird about it,
I won't tell Rodrigo.
1243
00:55:01,401 --> 00:55:03,445
I appreciate it.
1244
00:55:04,321 --> 00:55:06,281
I went on a date last night.
1245
00:55:06,406 --> 00:55:07,699
So far,
so good.
1246
00:55:07,824 --> 00:55:08,908
With the Realtor chick.
1247
00:55:09,867 --> 00:55:11,410
Dody Henderson?
Did she peg you?
1248
00:55:11,535 --> 00:55:14,371
No, not Dody.
I went out with Kelly.
1249
00:55:14,497 --> 00:55:15,706
Oh, thank the Lord.
1250
00:55:15,831 --> 00:55:17,875
I felt bad for your butt hole for a minute.
1251
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:18,542
Heh, heh.
1252
00:55:18,542 --> 00:55:19,084
Yeah.
1253
00:55:19,209 --> 00:55:23,463
Yeah, and I think we've got a problem because
1254
00:55:24,339 --> 00:55:26,049
I really kind of dig her now.
1255
00:55:27,675 --> 00:55:30,052
I don't know what to do about the orgy situation.
1256
00:55:30,178 --> 00:55:31,596
Are you fucking with me right now?
1257
00:55:31,721 --> 00:55:33,889
I know.
What are the odds?
1258
00:55:34,014 --> 00:55:35,808
I mean, seriously,
I'm smack dab
1259
00:55:35,933 --> 00:55:37,643
in the middle of organizing an orgy.
1260
00:55:37,768 --> 00:55:38,435
Orgy, yeah.
1261
00:55:38,435 --> 00:55:39,144
Yes. Yeah.
1262
00:55:39,269 --> 00:55:42,189
And I meet the first girl in a long time that
1263
00:55:42,189 --> 00:55:44,441
I can see myself having a relationship with.
1264
00:55:45,442 --> 00:55:48,069
I got tell her about the orgy right?
1265
00:55:47,402 --> 00:55:49,362
What?
Ha-ha-ha!
1266
00:55:49,487 --> 00:55:51,864
No. No.
It's so stupid.
1267
00:55:51,989 --> 00:55:54,283
No. Listen to me.
No, no.
1268
00:55:54,408 --> 00:55:57,953
You don't ever, ever,
ever tell her about our little soiree here.
1269
00:55:58,078 --> 00:55:59,538
Ever.
1270
00:55:59,663 --> 00:56:01,206
Have you perked her yet?
1271
00:56:01,331 --> 00:56:03,708
Oh, goddamn it, Mike.
I hate when you say stuff.
1272
00:56:03,833 --> 00:56:05,919
No.
No, we've kissed.
1273
00:56:06,044 --> 00:56:07,795
Kissed, good.
Okay, good.
1274
00:56:07,921 --> 00:56:10,381
Keep it PG until after Labor Day, okay?
1275
00:56:10,506 --> 00:56:13,926
As long as you haven't had the exclusivity talk,
and you're not currently boning...
1276
00:56:14,051 --> 00:56:14,635
Yeah, I know.
1277
00:56:14,635 --> 00:56:15,886
Then you, my friend,
1278
00:56:16,011 --> 00:56:17,221
are a free agent.
1279
00:56:17,346 --> 00:56:19,348
Mm, I don't know, dude.
1280
00:56:19,473 --> 00:56:23,560
Listen to me.
You do not know what or who
1281
00:56:23,685 --> 00:56:25,603
she's been doing in her free time, ace.
1282
00:56:25,728 --> 00:56:28,940
So just keep it in your pants until après Labor Day
1283
00:56:29,065 --> 00:56:30,733
and then it'll just be this crazy,
1284
00:56:30,858 --> 00:56:34,028
wet, vivid, erotic
1285
00:56:34,153 --> 00:56:37,531
sexual misadventure in your past
1286
00:56:37,656 --> 00:56:40,534
that you never have to tell her about.
1287
00:56:44,829 --> 00:56:45,914
Okay...
1288
00:56:46,039 --> 00:56:46,956
Okay?
1289
00:56:46,956 --> 00:56:48,124
All right, that's the plan.
1290
00:56:48,124 --> 00:56:51,419
Thank you. That was oddly helpful.
1291
00:56:51,419 --> 00:56:54,380
I am not just a pretty face.
1292
00:56:55,714 --> 00:56:57,132
Oof, ma goof.
1293
00:56:57,257 --> 00:56:59,343
Daddy really needs to get in shape.
1294
00:56:59,468 --> 00:57:01,553
Oh, I'm with you.
I may even cut out curbs,
1295
00:57:01,678 --> 00:57:04,139
except for pizza and sandwiches, obviously.
1296
00:57:04,806 --> 00:57:08,685
Are you guys worried at all about
performing in front of everyone else?
1297
00:57:09,352 --> 00:57:11,395
Look, it's not a race.
1298
00:57:11,520 --> 00:57:13,606
Well, assuming that we can all get wood,
1299
00:57:13,731 --> 00:57:15,524
one of us will have the smallest dick.
1300
00:57:15,649 --> 00:57:18,569
And I, for one,
do not wanna have the smallest dick.
1301
00:57:18,694 --> 00:57:19,778
Okay.
Two things.
1302
00:57:19,903 --> 00:57:23,531
First off, the ladies are gonna be too concerned
about their bodies to think about yours.
1303
00:57:23,657 --> 00:57:26,034
And secondly,
that's all myth.
1304
00:57:26,910 --> 00:57:28,703
Women do not care about penis size.
1305
00:57:28,828 --> 00:57:31,289
Who do you think has the biggest dick?
1306
00:57:31,414 --> 00:57:32,540
I think I know.
1307
00:57:33,290 --> 00:57:36,377
Boom. Ah! You're next, Uncle Addie.
1308
00:57:36,377 --> 00:57:38,462
Whoa. Whoa, whoa.
1309
00:57:38,462 --> 00:57:41,256
No one fucking said anything
about giving any fucking blood.
1310
00:57:41,381 --> 00:57:41,840
Oops.
1311
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:42,716
And can someone explain to me
1312
00:57:42,841 --> 00:57:46,886
why they need to puncture your vein to find
out if there's a problem with your shvantz?
1313
00:57:47,011 --> 00:57:49,305
Summer after freshman year,
1314
00:57:49,430 --> 00:57:49,931
Yeah?
1315
00:57:49,931 --> 00:57:53,392
I walked in on one of the guys
1316
00:57:53,517 --> 00:57:55,477
whacking off.
1317
00:57:55,603 --> 00:57:56,687
Shut up. Who?
1318
00:57:56,687 --> 00:57:57,771
I won't say.
1319
00:57:57,896 --> 00:57:59,314
No, no, no, who?
Who? Who?
1320
00:57:59,439 --> 00:58:05,070
I'm not gonna tell you,
but I will say that it was a monster.
1321
00:58:05,195 --> 00:58:07,905
Hey.
That is my blood.
1322
00:58:08,031 --> 00:58:09,532
That used to be inside you.
1323
00:58:09,657 --> 00:58:10,783
I'm gonna lie down.
1324
00:58:10,908 --> 00:58:12,576
What?
Duquez, Duquez!
1325
00:58:12,702 --> 00:58:14,703
You got give us ballpark... Right, right.
1326
00:58:14,828 --> 00:58:15,871
Like is that...?
1327
00:58:15,996 --> 00:58:18,248
It's more like...
It was like that.
1328
00:58:18,373 --> 00:58:19,791
What?
But the head.
1329
00:58:19,916 --> 00:58:21,501
What?
It's even bigger.
1330
00:58:21,626 --> 00:58:22,878
Mama likes.
1331
00:58:23,003 --> 00:58:24,879
I don't know if you're gonna like it.
1332
00:58:26,965 --> 00:58:29,342
Oh, hi.
1333
00:58:29,467 --> 00:58:30,718
Eric?
1334
00:58:30,843 --> 00:58:33,137
Kelly.
Uh, we're just heading back to the city.
1335
00:58:33,262 --> 00:58:34,472
Yeah, we'll be in touch this week.
1336
00:58:34,472 --> 00:58:35,097
Good.
1337
00:58:35,222 --> 00:58:36,307
Regarding the house.
1338
00:58:36,432 --> 00:58:39,351
Of course, the house, yes.
Yeah, I'll page you.
1339
00:58:41,812 --> 00:58:43,021
Dody.
1340
00:58:43,021 --> 00:58:44,230
Eric.
1341
00:58:44,356 --> 00:58:46,274
The password this week is unicorn.
1342
00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:49,485
Well, I don't know if that'll be nece...
1343
00:59:05,458 --> 00:59:07,961
We're here to share our experiences
1344
00:59:08,086 --> 00:59:11,881
in creating the perfect orgy of your personal fantasies.
1345
00:59:17,302 --> 00:59:20,055
See that?
Everybody's always touching two people.
1346
00:59:19,554 --> 00:59:21,348
A little teamwork over there.
1347
00:59:21,473 --> 00:59:23,058
They're playing good team ball.
1348
00:59:23,183 --> 00:59:25,518
Okay, I think we get the picture.
1349
00:59:32,566 --> 00:59:34,318
McCrudds, you want some pizza?
1350
00:59:34,443 --> 00:59:36,111
No, I'm not hungry.
Thank you.
1351
00:59:36,236 --> 00:59:38,363
Got an all-I-can-eat buffet going right here.
1352
00:59:41,992 --> 00:59:43,368
What is that?
1353
00:59:46,246 --> 00:59:47,121
Oh!
1354
00:59:47,121 --> 00:59:48,039
Shit!
1355
00:59:48,164 --> 00:59:50,541
Oh, he's doing my move.
Look at that.
1356
00:59:50,666 --> 00:59:52,710
He knows the Thoosh.
1357
00:59:55,588 --> 00:59:56,880
Hey, you guys?
Guys.
1358
00:59:57,005 --> 01:00:01,343
Back to the music. Are we...?
Are we really gonna listen to Indian the whole night?
1359
01:00:01,468 --> 01:00:02,844
I think it might get a little...
1360
01:00:02,844 --> 01:00:04,220
Cab ride-y? Agreed. Yeah.
1361
01:00:04,346 --> 01:00:06,681
I'm working on a killer playlist right now.
1362
01:00:06,806 --> 01:00:08,516
Got some obscure Radiohead.
1363
01:00:08,641 --> 01:00:10,726
Who has sex to Radiohead?
1364
01:00:10,852 --> 01:00:12,728
Thom Yorke.
1365
01:00:12,853 --> 01:00:14,271
No Radiohead.
No Radiohead.
1366
01:00:14,396 --> 01:00:17,566
I think we need something sensual,
like Sting.
1367
01:00:17,691 --> 01:00:18,400
I love Sting.
1368
01:00:18,400 --> 01:00:19,109
No. No. No.
1369
01:00:19,234 --> 01:00:21,528
Unacceptable.
Absolutely not fucking Sting.
1370
01:00:21,653 --> 01:00:24,364
That's bullshit, man.
If Sting comes on the fucking stereo,
1371
01:00:24,489 --> 01:00:25,990
guess who's walking.
This guy.
1372
01:00:26,116 --> 01:00:28,201
Sting, it is then.
1373
01:00:33,789 --> 01:00:35,124
got you a little present.
1374
01:00:35,249 --> 01:00:35,791
Really?
1375
01:00:35,791 --> 01:00:36,333
Mm-hm.
1376
01:00:36,667 --> 01:00:39,336
It's filled with some great things for next weekend.
1377
01:00:39,461 --> 01:00:41,588
It's not my birthday.
Oh.
1378
01:00:43,048 --> 01:00:46,634
Look, oh, boy. Oh, wow. Look at that guy.
He's like a Swiss Army dude.
1379
01:00:46,759 --> 01:00:49,053
Wow, that's great.
People are gonna love that.
1380
01:00:49,178 --> 01:00:50,179
Just so you know...
1381
01:00:50,179 --> 01:00:50,763
Mm-hm?
1382
01:00:51,806 --> 01:00:53,766
I'm not wearing any underwear right now.
1383
01:00:53,891 --> 01:00:55,309
Ew, on these stools?
1384
01:00:55,309 --> 01:00:57,352
Well, well, well, the gang's all here.
1385
01:00:57,352 --> 01:00:59,104
Paciellio!
1386
01:00:59,229 --> 01:01:00,772
Hi.
Paciellio.
1387
01:01:02,149 --> 01:01:03,066
Hi, guys.
1388
01:01:03,066 --> 01:01:03,984
What's up?
1389
01:01:04,109 --> 01:01:05,944
We have some business to discuss.
1390
01:01:06,069 --> 01:01:11,741
Right.
So Glenn and I have talked it over and...
1391
01:01:12,867 --> 01:01:15,327
we would like to be included in the orgy.
1392
01:01:16,870 --> 01:01:18,872
We're in.
1393
01:01:18,997 --> 01:01:20,123
We wanna do it.
1394
01:01:23,168 --> 01:01:25,128
Um...
1395
01:01:26,838 --> 01:01:27,922
No.
1396
01:01:28,047 --> 01:01:29,215
Why not?
What... What?
1397
01:01:29,340 --> 01:01:31,217
We already lined up my folks to babysit.
1398
01:01:31,676 --> 01:01:35,179
Guys, guys,
as a friend and a mental-health professional,
1399
01:01:35,304 --> 01:01:37,139
I think it is a horrible, horrible idea.
1400
01:01:37,264 --> 01:01:39,391
If you feel disconnected from the group,
I can understand...
1401
01:01:39,516 --> 01:01:42,227
Alison, with all due respect,
1402
01:01:42,352 --> 01:01:44,729
you're an MA,
I'm an MD.
1403
01:01:45,063 --> 01:01:46,606
You're a podiatrist.
1404
01:01:46,731 --> 01:01:48,441
Okay, let's take a vote.
1405
01:01:48,566 --> 01:01:49,942
How many people want us in?
1406
01:01:49,942 --> 01:01:50,860
Right.
1407
01:01:50,985 --> 01:01:54,155
I would just like to say that I think
they maybe have a point here.
1408
01:01:54,280 --> 01:01:57,616
Just because they have a baby
doesn't mean we should discriminate them.
1409
01:01:57,741 --> 01:02:00,952
Plus, Kate's rack is killer right now.
1410
01:02:01,078 --> 01:02:02,704
Thank you, Michael. Yeah.
1411
01:02:02,829 --> 01:02:06,374
Jesus, Mike,
are you insane? No. No, no.
1412
01:02:06,499 --> 01:02:09,460
Dude, dude, dude, 10 o'clock.
Ten o'clock. My 10, my 10.
1413
01:02:10,711 --> 01:02:12,088
Shit.
1414
01:02:12,213 --> 01:02:14,924
Hey!
Look who it is.
1415
01:02:15,049 --> 01:02:16,592
Hi, there it is.
1416
01:02:16,717 --> 01:02:18,635
Hey, uh,
this is my Realtor, Kelly.
1417
01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:20,512
This is the group,
the gang.
1418
01:02:20,637 --> 01:02:22,305
Hi, Kelly.
1419
01:02:22,430 --> 01:02:24,849
Gosh, I've heard so much about all of you guys.
1420
01:02:24,974 --> 01:02:26,518
How?
When?
1421
01:02:26,643 --> 01:02:27,936
What? Why? What's she hiking about?
1422
01:02:27,936 --> 01:02:29,270
Let's get a drink shall we?
1423
01:02:29,395 --> 01:02:31,063
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1424
01:02:32,148 --> 01:02:34,984
You think we couldn't handle this because we're parents?
1425
01:02:35,109 --> 01:02:38,153
Well, we can handle shit that you can't even imagine.
1426
01:02:38,278 --> 01:02:40,906
You know,
you motherfuckers have no idea.
1427
01:02:41,031 --> 01:02:41,698
That's right.
1428
01:02:41,698 --> 01:02:42,407
No idea.
1429
01:02:42,532 --> 01:02:43,617
Come on.
1430
01:02:43,617 --> 01:02:44,743
You... You...
1431
01:02:44,868 --> 01:02:46,911
You're all lightweights
1432
01:02:47,036 --> 01:02:49,872
You are all playing JV ball.
1433
01:02:49,997 --> 01:02:50,540
Lightweights!
1434
01:02:50,540 --> 01:02:51,082
Whoa!
1435
01:02:51,207 --> 01:02:52,166
All right, Glenn.
1436
01:02:52,166 --> 01:02:53,125
Come on, honey.
1437
01:02:54,126 --> 01:02:57,463
On a lighter note,
I have this present.
1438
01:02:59,881 --> 01:03:01,091
Dildos!
1439
01:03:01,216 --> 01:03:04,177
You know, in a pinch,
this would be great for a toothbrush.
1440
01:03:07,055 --> 01:03:08,639
And I have no idea what this is.
1441
01:03:08,765 --> 01:03:11,100
Hey, Eric,
what's up with all the dildos?
1442
01:03:11,225 --> 01:03:14,270
Hey, those are my friends, lady.
Hey, what's going on with the house?
1443
01:03:14,395 --> 01:03:19,191
Um, I've been able to slow things down
to buy you till the end of the summer.
1444
01:03:19,733 --> 01:03:20,525
Really?
1445
01:03:20,525 --> 01:03:21,318
Yeah.
1446
01:03:22,027 --> 01:03:24,070
Oh, you're the best.
1447
01:03:26,364 --> 01:03:27,740
Thank you so much.
1448
01:03:27,865 --> 01:03:28,658
What is that?
1449
01:03:28,658 --> 01:03:29,450
What? What?
1450
01:03:29,575 --> 01:03:30,368
What's going on?
1451
01:03:30,368 --> 01:03:31,160
Nothing.
1452
01:03:31,285 --> 01:03:33,079
No, he told me not to tell anybody so...
1453
01:03:33,204 --> 01:03:33,871
Yeah, okay.
1454
01:03:33,871 --> 01:03:34,580
You know.
1455
01:03:35,706 --> 01:03:36,498
Keep it on the down-low.
1456
01:03:36,498 --> 01:03:37,332
Yeah.
1457
01:03:37,458 --> 01:03:39,293
He asked her out to get them to shill.
1458
01:03:39,418 --> 01:03:41,044
Went on a couple dates,
he start likes her,
1459
01:03:41,169 --> 01:03:44,714
decide doesn't want to sleep with her before
the orgy because it's wrong to do both.
1460
01:03:44,839 --> 01:03:46,758
Oh.
He doesn't wanna sleep with her.
1461
01:03:46,883 --> 01:03:49,093
That actually means he likes her.
1462
01:03:49,218 --> 01:03:49,719
Oh.
1463
01:03:49,719 --> 01:03:50,261
Awesome.
1464
01:03:50,386 --> 01:03:52,096
Hey.
Dildo wave.
1465
01:03:52,221 --> 01:03:54,265
Hi.
1466
01:04:12,365 --> 01:04:13,949
Phew!
1467
01:04:14,074 --> 01:04:16,702
Yo, maharajah,
wanna get my back for me?
1468
01:04:16,827 --> 01:04:18,996
What is this shit?
Self tanner, man.
1469
01:04:19,121 --> 01:04:20,997
I wanna look like a porn star.
1470
01:04:21,123 --> 01:04:23,500
Fuck me,
I just stroked out my third batch du jour.
1471
01:04:23,625 --> 01:04:27,420
You boys might wanna do the same.
Don't wanna come quick like a bunch of amateurs.
1472
01:04:27,545 --> 01:04:30,423
Oh, God.
I am not touching you.
1473
01:04:31,340 --> 01:04:33,426
Ah, fuck it.
I'm gonna whack it again.
1474
01:04:33,551 --> 01:04:36,345
You look so pretty.
So do you.
1475
01:04:36,470 --> 01:04:37,554
Thank you.
1476
01:04:37,679 --> 01:04:39,097
I love it.
1477
01:04:39,223 --> 01:04:40,849
Consider yourself warned.
1478
01:04:40,974 --> 01:04:44,394
This absinthe is the real deal.
I had it flown in from Amsterdam.
1479
01:04:44,519 --> 01:04:48,731
The guy that sold it to me said it's the same stuff
Van Gogh was on when he cut his ear off.
1480
01:04:48,856 --> 01:04:49,440
Oh, no.
1481
01:04:49,440 --> 01:04:50,066
Uh-oh.
1482
01:04:50,191 --> 01:04:51,984
It's gonna be a starry night, huh?
1483
01:04:52,109 --> 01:04:53,277
It smells like licorice.
1484
01:04:53,402 --> 01:04:55,779
A toast.
A toast.
1485
01:04:55,904 --> 01:04:57,448
To friends.
1486
01:04:57,573 --> 01:04:58,991
To friends.
1487
01:04:59,116 --> 01:05:03,245
And to making sweet love with, to, near...
1488
01:05:03,370 --> 01:05:03,995
On.
1489
01:05:03,995 --> 01:05:04,663
In.
1490
01:05:04,788 --> 01:05:06,915
Under.
And behind.
1491
01:05:09,208 --> 01:05:11,002
All right, salud.
1492
01:05:14,296 --> 01:05:15,923
Hagalaka.
1493
01:05:16,048 --> 01:05:18,091
Whoo! Sober.
Never more
1494
01:05:26,391 --> 01:05:28,101
The pillows look really nice.
1495
01:05:28,226 --> 01:05:29,560
Yeah.
1496
01:05:29,685 --> 01:05:31,646
These Crate and Barrel or...?
1497
01:05:40,195 --> 01:05:41,279
You guys look great.
1498
01:05:41,405 --> 01:05:42,572
Oh, thanks.
1499
01:05:42,697 --> 01:05:44,074
You look so fucking hot.
1500
01:05:44,199 --> 01:05:47,076
I'm just being honest.
I wanna lick your belly button.
1501
01:05:47,201 --> 01:05:50,288
And yours, your belly button's nice too.
You got a good one too.
1502
01:05:50,413 --> 01:05:53,582
I haven't seen yours,
but I'm gonna lick the shit out of that thing.
1503
01:05:53,707 --> 01:05:55,084
Wow.
1504
01:05:55,209 --> 01:05:58,086
As the de facto lead wolf, right?
1505
01:05:58,212 --> 01:06:01,006
I, uh...
I should kick this mofo off,
1506
01:06:01,131 --> 01:06:04,301
but I got be honest with you.
I have no idea what to do, so...
1507
01:06:04,426 --> 01:06:05,176
Lead wolf?
1508
01:06:05,176 --> 01:06:05,927
Oh, yeah.
1509
01:06:06,052 --> 01:06:07,637
You had to be there kind of...
1510
01:06:07,637 --> 01:06:09,263
Tut-tut-tut. Okay.
1511
01:06:09,389 --> 01:06:11,891
Listen up, everybody.
As per usual,
1512
01:06:12,016 --> 01:06:14,935
it is up to me to get this party started.
1513
01:06:15,060 --> 01:06:18,397
Hang on. I got something for you.
Hang on a second, ladies.
1514
01:06:23,526 --> 01:06:24,778
Yeah, rock 'n' roll.
1515
01:06:24,778 --> 01:06:26,029
Holy moly.
1516
01:06:26,154 --> 01:06:27,238
We're on safari now.
1517
01:06:27,363 --> 01:06:28,489
Yeah.
1518
01:06:28,614 --> 01:06:30,116
How many leopards had to die?
1519
01:06:30,241 --> 01:06:32,410
Just one big old kinky leopard.
1520
01:06:33,744 --> 01:06:34,912
They won't kick us out.
1521
01:06:34,912 --> 01:06:37,164
If we're here,
they won't kick us out.
1522
01:06:37,289 --> 01:06:38,081
Okay.
1523
01:06:38,081 --> 01:06:39,708
They won't do it.
1524
01:06:39,833 --> 01:06:42,878
And we're totally sure we wanna do this?
1525
01:06:46,422 --> 01:06:49,675
Somebody do something.
Huh?
1526
01:06:49,801 --> 01:06:52,553
All right?
Anybody?
1527
01:06:53,345 --> 01:06:57,724
All right, fuck it. I'm gonna call it.
Sue, kiss Alison. I'm gonna shirt touching myself.
1528
01:06:57,850 --> 01:07:01,561
Oh.
We could shirt with a back-rub circle like in college.
1529
01:07:04,272 --> 01:07:06,483
I'll get things started.
1530
01:07:06,608 --> 01:07:08,067
Yes.
Yeah!
1531
01:07:08,192 --> 01:07:10,278
Here we go.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1532
01:07:11,070 --> 01:07:14,114
I'm sorry, I can't.
I can't do this any more.
1533
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:15,908
I can't. I can't do this.
I'm sorry.
1534
01:07:18,368 --> 01:07:19,411
I knew it.
1535
01:07:19,536 --> 01:07:21,746
I knew you'd fucking puss out, man.
1536
01:07:21,872 --> 01:07:24,165
I'm not pussing out.
I'm happen in a relationship
1537
01:07:24,290 --> 01:07:27,168
that I really appreciate.
And I don't wanna fuck this up.
1538
01:07:27,293 --> 01:07:30,087
Classic Duquez. You know,
it's like doughnuts, no doughnuts,
1539
01:07:30,213 --> 01:07:32,089
hat, no hat, orgy,
no orgy.
1540
01:07:32,214 --> 01:07:34,049
We take a look-see through the window
1541
01:07:34,175 --> 01:07:36,719
and if it looks, like,
too freaky or lame,
1542
01:07:36,844 --> 01:07:38,428
Yeah.
We take off.
1543
01:07:38,554 --> 01:07:42,682
And if it looks,
you know, cool, we go in.
1544
01:07:42,807 --> 01:07:43,642
Okay?
1545
01:07:43,642 --> 01:07:44,476
okay...
1546
01:07:44,601 --> 01:07:46,060
I'm not mad at you.
1547
01:07:46,186 --> 01:07:48,563
Eric, Eric.
I love what's going on here,
1548
01:07:48,688 --> 01:07:50,815
but I don't think you need to insult each other.
1549
01:07:50,940 --> 01:07:52,233
You should actually communicate.
1550
01:07:52,233 --> 01:07:53,567
My God, Alison, please for all of us?
1551
01:07:53,692 --> 01:07:55,444
Would you give it a rest? Just one night?
1552
01:07:55,444 --> 01:07:57,237
You're totally uncomfortable with real emotion.
1553
01:07:57,362 --> 01:07:59,906
Oh, yeah, I can't.
I'm the only one here with issues.
1554
01:08:00,032 --> 01:08:02,742
It's just me?
What about you and your disfunctional relationship?
1555
01:08:02,868 --> 01:08:03,451
We broke up.
1556
01:08:03,451 --> 01:08:04,077
You broke up?
1557
01:08:04,202 --> 01:08:04,703
Yes.
1558
01:08:04,703 --> 01:08:05,245
Oh, you broke up?
1559
01:08:05,370 --> 01:08:08,748
Like the same you guys broke up a couple years
ago at the Oktoberfest in July party?
1560
01:08:08,873 --> 01:08:09,916
Like that kind of broke up?
1561
01:08:09,916 --> 01:08:11,000
Wait, what happened on Oktoberfest?
1562
01:08:11,125 --> 01:08:14,420
This one tells me that her and Marcus are broken up.
The're over. Done. Fenito. Right?
1563
01:08:14,545 --> 01:08:17,589
So, we're joking around, we having some drinks,
she tells me about it, then we hook up.
1564
01:08:17,714 --> 01:08:20,300
Very next morning,
she's having brunch with the guy.
1565
01:08:20,425 --> 01:08:22,761
Whoa, whoa, wait? What?
1566
01:08:22,886 --> 01:08:24,220
You never told me this.
1567
01:08:24,346 --> 01:08:28,141
Sue, I don't need to tell you because nothing happened.
We didn't sleep together.
1568
01:08:28,266 --> 01:08:30,643
You told me it was a blowjob,
she wouldn't swallow.
1569
01:08:30,768 --> 01:08:32,937
No, I did not, Mike.
I did not say that.
1570
01:08:33,062 --> 01:08:34,313
It was a fucking hand job.
1571
01:08:34,313 --> 01:08:35,564
Oh, that's hand job. That's right.
1572
01:08:35,689 --> 01:08:37,816
It was a hand job.
I'm sorry. My bad.
1573
01:08:37,941 --> 01:08:39,026
Please don't go there.
1574
01:08:39,026 --> 01:08:40,152
No, no, no.
1575
01:08:40,277 --> 01:08:43,655
Alison, shut up.
You're a hypocrite.
1576
01:08:43,780 --> 01:08:45,073
What's going on?
1577
01:08:45,198 --> 01:08:49,577
First of all,
they're dressed like Indians from India.
1578
01:08:49,702 --> 01:08:50,661
That makes much more sense.
1579
01:08:50,661 --> 01:08:51,662
Yeah.
1580
01:08:51,787 --> 01:08:53,164
This is why I don't tell you.
1581
01:08:53,164 --> 01:08:54,582
You could've given him a blowjob.
1582
01:08:54,707 --> 01:08:55,874
Why didn't you fuck him?
1583
01:08:55,874 --> 01:08:57,084
Why don't you get over it?
1584
01:08:57,209 --> 01:09:00,045
How long are you gonna be obsessed with Eric?
1585
01:09:01,004 --> 01:09:02,088
Oh, shit.
1586
01:09:03,089 --> 01:09:04,632
Wait, what?
1587
01:09:06,050 --> 01:09:08,052
Okay. Ookay...
1588
01:09:08,177 --> 01:09:10,388
Urch' your brakes on, people.
1589
01:09:10,513 --> 01:09:13,099
We are rapidly losing the erotic vibe.
1590
01:09:13,682 --> 01:09:17,227
I'm gonna get this party rocking right here in a major way.
1591
01:09:17,352 --> 01:09:18,937
What you got, man?
1592
01:09:19,062 --> 01:09:21,481
Ready, set,
here we go.
1593
01:09:21,606 --> 01:09:23,900
Oh!
Let loose the Kraken.
1594
01:09:24,025 --> 01:09:25,944
Yeah!
1595
01:09:26,069 --> 01:09:29,072
Will you give it a break, Mike?
This shit's pathetic.
1596
01:09:29,197 --> 01:09:31,824
Oh, fuck you.
You fucking pussy. You're lame.
1597
01:09:31,949 --> 01:09:33,409
You're the lame one, man.
1598
01:09:33,534 --> 01:09:36,912
You don't have a job. You don't have a girlfriend.
You just follow Eric around
1599
01:09:37,037 --> 01:09:40,374
and do everything he tells you to do.
You're like his little fucking pet.
1600
01:09:43,084 --> 01:09:44,711
Dougie.
1601
01:09:44,836 --> 01:09:45,920
Fuck you, Doug.
1602
01:09:50,633 --> 01:09:54,595
Is that what all of you think of me?
You think that I'm his...? You think I'm his fucking pet?
1603
01:09:54,720 --> 01:09:56,430
No.
1604
01:09:57,139 --> 01:10:00,642
He meant pet in a nice way.
1605
01:10:03,353 --> 01:10:05,397
Is he fucking with me right now?
1606
01:10:05,980 --> 01:10:09,484
This is the worst orgy ever.
1607
01:10:08,900 --> 01:10:10,943
Should we just go home or...?
1608
01:10:11,068 --> 01:10:12,570
No.
1609
01:10:12,695 --> 01:10:14,947
We already got a sitter.
1610
01:10:15,072 --> 01:10:17,616
You wanna go see a movie or you wanna...?
1611
01:10:21,328 --> 01:10:22,954
Okay, okay.
All right, time out.
1612
01:10:23,079 --> 01:10:25,248
Time out.
Time out, T.O., okay?
1613
01:10:25,373 --> 01:10:28,668
Look, I think everyone just needs to take a deep breath.
1614
01:10:28,793 --> 01:10:30,086
All right?
1615
01:10:31,087 --> 01:10:34,548
We need to relax and chill out for a second,
all right?
1616
01:10:34,673 --> 01:10:36,216
Whoa!
1617
01:10:36,342 --> 01:10:37,676
Where are you going?
1618
01:10:37,801 --> 01:10:39,928
I'm just going outside to get some fresh air.
1619
01:10:40,053 --> 01:10:41,596
Clear my head.
1620
01:10:44,724 --> 01:10:47,268
I swear to God, guys,
I thought this was gonna be fun.
1621
01:11:10,873 --> 01:11:13,417
Oh, yeah.
Oh!
1622
01:11:13,542 --> 01:11:16,253
Why won't God just let me have an orgy?
1623
01:11:23,802 --> 01:11:27,096
Okay. All right,
here we go.
1624
01:11:30,183 --> 01:11:31,350
Eric.
1625
01:11:31,350 --> 01:11:32,560
Kelly, heh, heh.
1626
01:11:32,685 --> 01:11:35,271
What are you doing here?
I thought you were doing something with your friends.
1627
01:11:35,396 --> 01:11:36,605
I know.
I know. Uh...
1628
01:11:36,730 --> 01:11:38,315
Did you fly here on a carpet?
1629
01:11:38,440 --> 01:11:40,692
No, heh.
No, no. I, uh...
1630
01:11:40,817 --> 01:11:43,778
It's a last-second costume concept for, uh...
1631
01:11:43,862 --> 01:11:48,074
Look, I, uh... I've been thinking about
things and I realized something.
1632
01:11:48,825 --> 01:11:49,951
Oh, shit.
1633
01:11:50,076 --> 01:11:52,703
I thought we ordered pizza.
What'd you get, Indian food?
1634
01:11:55,331 --> 01:11:56,415
I'm sorry.
1635
01:11:56,540 --> 01:11:59,459
I, uh...
Sorry to interrupt. Sorry.
1636
01:11:59,585 --> 01:12:02,379
Uh, Pete, give us a second?
Hey, hey, hey, Eric.
1637
01:12:02,504 --> 01:12:04,089
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
1638
01:12:04,214 --> 01:12:04,756
You didn't call.
1639
01:12:04,756 --> 01:12:05,340
I know.
1640
01:12:05,465 --> 01:12:08,176
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
1641
01:12:08,301 --> 01:12:11,053
Oh, pizza?
Really?
1642
01:12:11,178 --> 01:12:12,138
I'm sorry.
1643
01:12:12,138 --> 01:12:13,139
No, that's all right.
1644
01:12:13,264 --> 01:12:14,181
Hey, what's up, man?
1645
01:12:14,181 --> 01:12:15,099
Eighteen bucks.
1646
01:12:15,224 --> 01:12:16,767
Go, have fun.
Hone...
1647
01:12:16,892 --> 01:12:19,102
Honestly.
No biggie.
1648
01:12:19,228 --> 01:12:20,604
I'll call you tomorrow.
1649
01:12:22,355 --> 01:12:23,815
Bye.
1650
01:12:25,650 --> 01:12:29,612
Like I don't know that I don't have a girlfriend.
1651
01:12:29,737 --> 01:12:35,159
Like I'm not trying to remember
that every fucking night of my life.
1652
01:12:35,284 --> 01:12:37,536
It's hard.
1653
01:12:44,501 --> 01:12:46,002
So where were we?
1654
01:12:46,503 --> 01:12:48,046
Where'd you go?
1655
01:12:47,670 --> 01:12:49,797
I know, I know,
I know, I, uh... Heh.
1656
01:12:49,922 --> 01:12:52,717
I'm sorry I left. You know, I...
1657
01:12:53,217 --> 01:13:00,682
I'm gonna be honest
with you, guys. Um, I'm freaking out a little.
1658
01:13:00,182 --> 01:13:02,893
I have had the best times of my life
1659
01:13:03,018 --> 01:13:05,228
with you guys in this house
1660
01:13:05,353 --> 01:13:10,024
and I'm gonna miss it.
1661
01:13:10,358 --> 01:13:13,027
I'm gonna miss it so much.
1662
01:13:13,152 --> 01:13:15,571
I love you GUYS...
1663
01:13:15,863 --> 01:13:19,408
I love every single one of you.
1664
01:13:19,116 --> 01:13:20,534
She wasn't home, huh?
1665
01:13:21,159 --> 01:13:24,037
No.
No, She was home.
1666
01:13:24,162 --> 01:13:25,371
She was on a date.
1667
01:13:27,081 --> 01:13:30,501
Yeah.
And I showed up dressed like fucking Aladdin.
1668
01:13:32,461 --> 01:13:34,880
Well, I think that you look adorable.
1669
01:13:35,005 --> 01:13:39,384
And I am so happy that you're back.
1670
01:13:39,509 --> 01:13:43,138
It's been a pretty emotional night for all of us.
1671
01:13:43,263 --> 01:13:46,641
How about a big super-gay group hug?
1672
01:13:46,766 --> 01:13:47,809
Oh, yeah.
1673
01:13:47,809 --> 01:13:48,851
Group hug.
1674
01:13:48,976 --> 01:13:50,019
Yeah.
1675
01:13:50,144 --> 01:13:52,521
Oh!
I love you guys.
1676
01:13:57,359 --> 01:13:58,610
Oh, my God.
1677
01:14:00,862 --> 01:14:03,573
Oh, my... I would not have called that.
1678
01:14:08,453 --> 01:14:10,079
Hey, what was that about earlier?
1679
01:14:10,204 --> 01:14:11,580
Yeah, nothing.
Later. What?
1680
01:14:14,124 --> 01:14:15,417
Wha...?
1681
01:14:16,502 --> 01:14:18,295
Oh, gosh!
1682
01:14:18,420 --> 01:14:20,714
It's happening.
It's really happening.
1683
01:14:20,839 --> 01:14:23,592
We can do this.
I don't know if I can.
1684
01:14:23,717 --> 01:14:25,468
We'll do it together.
Okay?
1685
01:14:27,804 --> 01:14:30,056
One.
1686
01:14:31,474 --> 01:14:33,476
Two.
1687
01:14:35,811 --> 01:14:36,895
Three.
1688
01:14:39,690 --> 01:14:41,691
Hello, boobs.
1689
01:14:44,361 --> 01:14:45,528
Are they okay?
1690
01:14:46,738 --> 01:14:49,115
They're fucking fabulous.
1691
01:14:48,990 --> 01:14:51,200
Thank you.
1692
01:14:53,536 --> 01:14:56,663
Oh.
And just so you know, um,
1693
01:14:56,789 --> 01:15:01,126
I've never been able to orgasm,
so no pressure.
1694
01:15:01,251 --> 01:15:03,211
I'm all about giving pleasure.
1695
01:15:03,336 --> 01:15:05,463
This is so much better than porn.
1696
01:15:16,015 --> 01:15:17,516
Oh, my God!
1697
01:15:17,641 --> 01:15:18,684
I told you so.
1698
01:15:18,809 --> 01:15:19,935
You weren't kidding.
1699
01:15:20,560 --> 01:15:23,521
That is remarkable that he is insecure.
1700
01:15:26,399 --> 01:15:28,443
Tequila!
1701
01:15:52,923 --> 01:15:55,551
Everybody, drink from the ceiling.
1702
01:16:05,560 --> 01:16:06,603
Hey, Mike.
1703
01:16:06,603 --> 01:16:07,687
Hi there.
1704
01:16:07,812 --> 01:16:11,899
You guys have got try these chocolate-covered
strawberries. They're so decadent.
1705
01:16:12,024 --> 01:16:14,360
Oh, no, no. I'm good.
I just had some Bagel Bites.
1706
01:16:15,194 --> 01:16:16,862
Where'd you get Bagel Bites?
1707
01:16:16,153 --> 01:16:17,863
Shh. Forget it.
1708
01:16:17,988 --> 01:16:19,615
Mahalo, freaky people.
1709
01:16:19,740 --> 01:16:23,535
We were thinking it might be fun if we
all went out and made love in the pool.
1710
01:16:23,660 --> 01:16:24,828
Yes, yes.
1711
01:16:25,328 --> 01:16:26,538
Yeah, you wanna go in the pool?
1712
01:16:26,162 --> 01:16:28,581
No. No, no. We're good right here.
We're good.
1713
01:16:28,706 --> 01:16:29,457
Oh, we're okay.
1714
01:16:29,457 --> 01:16:30,208
Yeah.
1715
01:16:30,333 --> 01:16:33,544
Thanks though.
It's chlorinated. Have fun.
1716
01:16:35,921 --> 01:16:38,006
Sue, I'm so happy for you.
1717
01:16:38,131 --> 01:16:41,259
All right, Hey, guys,
could we just get a minute? Just a minute?
1718
01:16:41,384 --> 01:16:43,261
Yeah, just give us a sec,
will you?
1719
01:16:43,386 --> 01:16:46,347
Oh, so sorry.
1720
01:16:46,472 --> 01:16:49,058
We're not giving you enough privacy at an orgy?
1721
01:16:51,769 --> 01:16:52,770
Kind of a fair hit.
1722
01:16:52,687 --> 01:16:53,646
Yeah, now, shh.
1723
01:16:53,771 --> 01:16:55,689
Are you okay?
You wanna talk or something?
1724
01:16:55,814 --> 01:16:58,692
No, no.
Just be in the moment.
1725
01:16:58,817 --> 01:17:01,903
Okay. Yeah, no, can do.
Can do. Okay. Okay.
1726
01:17:04,447 --> 01:17:05,490
Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.
1727
01:17:05,490 --> 01:17:06,574
Oh, yeah?
1728
01:17:06,699 --> 01:17:08,201
You like to dirty talk?
Yeah?
1729
01:17:08,326 --> 01:17:09,202
Ooh, fuck.
1730
01:17:09,202 --> 01:17:10,077
Okay, you wanna fuck me?
1731
01:17:10,203 --> 01:17:11,621
You wanna fuck me hard?
1732
01:17:11,621 --> 01:17:13,080
No, Sue. Hop off. My foot, my foot.
1733
01:17:13,205 --> 01:17:14,290
Oh, oh, okay.
1734
01:17:14,415 --> 01:17:15,541
Oh, foot cramp.
Oh!
1735
01:17:15,666 --> 01:17:17,000
Okay.
Ooh, that's a doozie.
1736
01:17:17,126 --> 01:17:18,335
Shh. Okay.
All right
1737
01:17:18,460 --> 01:17:21,296
Oh, God,
my big toe's so far away from my other toes.
1738
01:17:21,421 --> 01:17:23,340
Okay, hey.
Hey, flex it out.
1739
01:17:23,465 --> 01:17:25,175
Flex it out.
Flex it, okay.
1740
01:17:25,300 --> 01:17:27,594
Oh, we should have done this 15 years ago.
1741
01:17:28,052 --> 01:17:30,012
Hey, guys.
1742
01:17:30,012 --> 01:17:32,306
I broke my diet.
1743
01:17:35,643 --> 01:17:36,560
Okay. You're good?
1744
01:17:36,560 --> 01:17:37,519
Oh, yeah.
1745
01:17:37,144 --> 01:17:39,062
Yeah? You're good?
Okay. There it goes.
1746
01:17:39,187 --> 01:17:41,565
There it goes.
Oh, wow. Okay.
1747
01:17:41,690 --> 01:17:43,483
Shh! Okay.
Okay. Okay.
1748
01:17:43,608 --> 01:17:46,945
Oh, no, it's back.
It's back worse!
1749
01:17:47,070 --> 01:17:49,197
Ooh, it's...
The little guy is in on it now.
1750
01:17:49,322 --> 01:17:51,991
Hey, gang.
Sake bombs.
1751
01:18:01,374 --> 01:18:02,667
Oh, my God!
1752
01:18:02,792 --> 01:18:05,503
Oh, my God, my dick is having the best night of its life.
1753
01:18:05,503 --> 01:18:08,673
Oh, we're all fucking. Oh, we're all finally fucking.
1754
01:18:08,673 --> 01:18:10,758
Oh, and I can be as loud as I fucking want!
1755
01:18:10,883 --> 01:18:11,968
Oh, no.
Shh, shh.
1756
01:18:14,470 --> 01:18:15,929
Owl Ow,
my contact.
1757
01:18:16,055 --> 01:18:17,514
Alison, my contact.
1758
01:18:17,639 --> 01:18:19,182
I'm good. I'm good. Play through.
1759
01:18:19,182 --> 01:18:20,726
Bro, count me down.
1760
01:18:20,851 --> 01:18:22,102
What?
1761
01:18:22,102 --> 01:18:23,353
Count me down from five.
1762
01:18:23,353 --> 01:18:25,021
What does that even mean?
1763
01:18:25,021 --> 01:18:26,689
Oh, fuck! Count me down from 10.
1764
01:18:26,689 --> 01:18:28,941
Count him down, Adam.
Trust me, just count him down.
1765
01:18:30,401 --> 01:18:32,862
Guys, this whole sex in the pool thing is not working.
1766
01:18:33,487 --> 01:18:36,031
Water is not a lubricant.
1767
01:18:35,656 --> 01:18:38,992
Okay, brothers and sisters.
Let's take this party indoors.
1768
01:18:39,117 --> 01:18:41,787
I'm running with a boner!
1769
01:18:42,120 --> 01:18:43,663
Pineapple mojitos.
1770
01:18:44,998 --> 01:18:46,499
Yeah, mulched with fresh mint.
1771
01:18:48,251 --> 01:18:49,377
Fuck!
1772
01:18:49,502 --> 01:18:50,670
Are you ready?
1773
01:18:50,795 --> 01:18:52,922
As I'll ever be.
1774
01:18:57,342 --> 01:18:59,720
Ooh! I'm next,
I'm next, I'm next.
1775
01:19:00,929 --> 01:19:02,013
Vodka tonic.
1776
01:19:07,560 --> 01:19:10,521
Yo, can I tag in?
1777
01:19:10,646 --> 01:19:14,108
Oh! You're like the sweet,
tender lion.
1778
01:19:14,233 --> 01:19:15,901
Mike, go away.
1779
01:19:16,026 --> 01:19:19,529
You guys haven't slept with anybody else yet.
You're hogging Willow.
1780
01:19:19,655 --> 01:19:21,364
Go away.
1781
01:19:21,490 --> 01:19:23,241
Go away, Mike.
1782
01:19:23,950 --> 01:19:25,034
Vodka.
1783
01:19:26,369 --> 01:19:27,453
Come on.
1784
01:19:27,578 --> 01:19:31,666
Sue, I just wanna say I'm so
sorry about the whole Eric thing.
1785
01:19:31,791 --> 01:19:35,127
No. Totally don't.
It's so over. I don't care.
1786
01:19:35,252 --> 01:19:39,965
No, but you know,
you're a really good friend and I love you.
1787
01:19:40,090 --> 01:19:44,427
No, I love you.
You are so smart and you're so beautiful.
1788
01:19:44,552 --> 01:19:48,306
And I totally get why he would wanna be with you.
1789
01:19:48,431 --> 01:19:49,849
You're the beautiful one.
1790
01:19:49,974 --> 01:19:52,852
Oh, my God,
your body is ridiculous.
1791
01:19:52,977 --> 01:19:55,145
Your body is ridiculous, okay?
1792
01:19:55,271 --> 01:19:58,440
And I would give anything to have your breasts
1793
01:19:58,565 --> 01:20:00,233
just for, like,
one day.
1794
01:20:00,359 --> 01:20:04,821
Yeah, but your ass is off the charts, seriously.
1795
01:20:04,988 --> 01:20:07,365
Okay. I would kill to have your eyes.
1796
01:20:07,365 --> 01:20:11,410
You know that you have the most beautiful green eyes
1797
01:20:11,410 --> 01:20:14,580
that I have ever seen.
1798
01:20:20,085 --> 01:20:21,545
Oh, yeah.
1799
01:20:26,674 --> 01:20:27,467
Oh, yeah
1800
01:20:27,467 --> 01:20:28,217
Oh!
1801
01:20:28,843 --> 01:20:30,136
Wow!
1802
01:20:30,261 --> 01:20:31,470
I saw that.
You see that?
1803
01:20:31,596 --> 01:20:33,472
It looked like a little flash of light.
1804
01:20:33,472 --> 01:20:35,349
I know. I think I just... God.
1805
01:20:36,016 --> 01:20:37,976
I never thought I'd hear myself say this,
1806
01:20:38,101 --> 01:20:40,354
but I'm gonna take a break
1807
01:20:40,479 --> 01:20:43,398
from this girl-on-girl-on-girl action
1808
01:20:43,523 --> 01:20:47,026
and check the score of the Yankee game.
1809
01:20:47,151 --> 01:20:49,195
This feels fucking fabulous.
1810
01:20:53,407 --> 01:20:54,450
Ah, Michael!
1811
01:20:55,075 --> 01:20:55,951
Let's go.
1812
01:20:55,951 --> 01:20:56,827
Are you sure?
1813
01:20:56,952 --> 01:20:58,954
Yes, 100,000 percent sure.
1814
01:20:59,079 --> 01:21:00,330
Let's go. Right now.
1815
01:21:00,330 --> 01:21:01,540
Okay, okay. Let's go.
1816
01:21:01,665 --> 01:21:05,293
You fucking did it. Look at this.
You are awe-inspiring.
1817
01:21:05,418 --> 01:21:06,544
Oh.
1818
01:21:06,669 --> 01:21:07,587
Thank you, Mike.
1819
01:21:07,587 --> 01:21:07,879
No.
1820
01:21:08,004 --> 01:21:12,299
I'm gonna tell you something right now and I
want you to listen because I fucking mean it.
1821
01:21:12,425 --> 01:21:14,009
Okay...
1822
01:21:14,134 --> 01:21:17,096
You could be the president of the United States.
1823
01:21:18,972 --> 01:21:20,849
Well I don't know, not after something like this.
1824
01:21:20,974 --> 01:21:24,269
Hey, shh, no.
I'm fucking serious.
1825
01:21:24,394 --> 01:21:27,480
You could do it if you wanted to.
1826
01:21:27,605 --> 01:21:29,482
Yeah.
1827
01:21:29,607 --> 01:21:31,525
You're getting kind of close, Mike.
1828
01:21:31,651 --> 01:21:32,401
Am I?
1829
01:21:32,401 --> 01:21:33,110
Yeah.
1830
01:21:33,235 --> 01:21:34,528
Oh.
1831
01:21:34,653 --> 01:21:36,989
You're not trying to kiss me,
are you?
1832
01:21:37,114 --> 01:21:38,782
Would it scare you if I was?
1833
01:21:39,658 --> 01:21:41,493
I guess so.
1834
01:21:41,618 --> 01:21:43,995
Fucking kiss chicken, dude.
1835
01:21:44,120 --> 01:21:45,288
It's on.
1836
01:21:45,288 --> 01:21:46,456
All right.
1837
01:21:46,581 --> 01:21:48,291
Let me just set this right here.
1838
01:21:48,416 --> 01:21:50,042
Whatever.
1839
01:21:56,965 --> 01:21:58,383
You scared yet?
1840
01:22:00,677 --> 01:22:01,511
No.
1841
01:22:01,511 --> 01:22:02,679
No?
1842
01:22:02,679 --> 01:22:03,805
Mm-mm.
1843
01:22:03,930 --> 01:22:07,475
How about now?
Touching your nose with my nose.
1844
01:22:07,600 --> 01:22:09,811
It's okay,
I'm part Eskimo.
1845
01:22:09,977 --> 01:22:11,937
We're nose-kissing, buddy.
1846
01:22:12,063 --> 01:22:14,481
It's more than our noses touching right now.
1847
01:22:14,607 --> 01:22:16,984
It's our souls.
1848
01:22:21,947 --> 01:22:23,823
Yeah, that's been brewing for years.
1849
01:22:23,948 --> 01:22:25,283
Well, I think we both won.
1850
01:22:27,368 --> 01:22:29,162
I'm pretty sure we both just lost.
1851
01:22:33,332 --> 01:22:34,291
Tonic.
1852
01:22:34,291 --> 01:22:35,209
Boo!
1853
01:22:38,128 --> 01:22:41,214
Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop.
Almost there. Almost there.
1854
01:22:41,339 --> 01:22:43,633
No, don't stop. Don't stop.
Ah! Don't stop.
1855
01:22:43,967 --> 01:22:47,053
It feels so good.
It feels so good, don't stop.
1856
01:22:51,057 --> 01:22:52,099
How about that?
1857
01:22:52,224 --> 01:22:54,685
So how long has this been going on?
1858
01:22:54,810 --> 01:22:56,103
About a half an hour.
1859
01:22:56,228 --> 01:22:58,272
I'm good. I'm gonna...
I'm getting it. Ah!
1860
01:22:58,397 --> 01:22:59,523
Poor bastard.
1861
01:22:59,648 --> 01:23:01,650
Fucking so good.
Aah!
1862
01:23:02,275 --> 01:23:03,610
Hang in there, buddy.
1863
01:23:03,109 --> 01:23:04,569
Almost there.
1864
01:23:04,569 --> 01:23:07,905
Yeah.
Yes. Yes!
1865
01:23:08,031 --> 01:23:09,866
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I'm coming.
1866
01:23:09,991 --> 01:23:12,535
Yes!
Oh, yes!
1867
01:23:12,660 --> 01:23:14,286
Yes, yes, yes!
1868
01:23:14,411 --> 01:23:17,289
Oh, yes!
Yes!
1869
01:23:17,414 --> 01:23:20,292
Yes!
Aah!
1870
01:23:39,768 --> 01:23:42,646
Hey!
Good morning, everybody.
1871
01:23:42,729 --> 01:23:44,856
So, uh,
look what I got.
1872
01:23:44,939 --> 01:23:47,483
Commemorative Labor Day orgy T-shirts right here.
1873
01:23:47,567 --> 01:23:48,985
Pink and blue.
1874
01:23:49,068 --> 01:23:51,279
Unisex, 100 percent cotton.
1875
01:23:51,362 --> 01:23:52,488
You made T-shirts?
1876
01:23:52,571 --> 01:23:54,073
Yup.
Laura.
1877
01:23:54,323 --> 01:23:56,075
Huh?
1878
01:23:56,784 --> 01:23:58,243
Where are we gonna wear these?
1879
01:23:58,327 --> 01:24:00,871
Anywhere.
What do you mean?
1880
01:24:01,371 --> 01:24:04,833
Jesus Christ,
I am hungover like a madman.
1881
01:24:06,084 --> 01:24:08,378
All right, ladies.
Ladies, I got one...
1882
01:24:08,461 --> 01:24:10,087
One easy question for all of you.
1883
01:24:10,546 --> 01:24:13,841
Overall, where would you rank me?
1884
01:24:13,924 --> 01:24:15,384
Just have a bagel and relax.
1885
01:24:15,467 --> 01:24:18,011
Listen, I need to know.
I just... I need to know.
1886
01:24:18,095 --> 01:24:21,973
Well, for me,
there was one clear winner.
1887
01:24:22,057 --> 01:24:25,727
Okay, I know, good. Eric. Blah, blah.
Big surprise. What about this guy?
1888
01:24:25,810 --> 01:24:27,812
I was gonna say Adam.
1889
01:24:27,812 --> 01:24:28,980
Adam.
1890
01:24:29,063 --> 01:24:30,398
What?
1891
01:24:30,481 --> 01:24:33,067
For a neurotic hypochondriac with panic attacks,
1892
01:24:33,150 --> 01:24:35,694
he was really uninhibited.
1893
01:24:35,778 --> 01:24:38,155
So what? Out of the four dudes in the house,
1894
01:24:38,155 --> 01:24:41,658
I didn't even rank in the top two?
That's what you're telling me?
1895
01:24:41,658 --> 01:24:42,867
Didn't I do my move?
1896
01:24:42,951 --> 01:24:45,745
The move with the fingers and the tongue?
The Thoosh?
1897
01:24:46,871 --> 01:24:47,705
Laura.
1898
01:24:47,789 --> 01:24:49,290
Come on, I thooshed you. I know I did.
1899
01:24:49,290 --> 01:24:50,833
You don't need to do it now.
1900
01:24:50,917 --> 01:24:52,668
You did it last night.
We don't need to see it again.
1901
01:24:52,752 --> 01:24:54,545
Yeah.
Can we just eat breakfast?
1902
01:24:57,214 --> 01:24:58,298
It's Marcus.
1903
01:25:01,676 --> 01:25:03,136
Hello?
1904
01:25:04,054 --> 01:25:05,972
Oh, tell him how much we missed him last night.
1905
01:25:07,724 --> 01:25:09,308
Hey.
Everybody's up.
1906
01:25:09,392 --> 01:25:10,518
Hey.
1907
01:25:10,601 --> 01:25:11,894
Morning.
1908
01:25:11,978 --> 01:25:14,480
Hey, man,
about the shit that went down last night...
1909
01:25:14,563 --> 01:25:19,026
Dude. Oh, shit, I'm sorry if I did anything
weird to you or Willow, like, any thooshing.
1910
01:25:19,109 --> 01:25:23,321
Anything like that. I'm sorry.
I was so fucking hammered, I don't remember anything.
1911
01:25:23,405 --> 01:25:24,531
Seriously, nothing?
1912
01:25:24,614 --> 01:25:25,865
You don't remember anything?
1913
01:25:25,865 --> 01:25:26,699
No.
1914
01:25:26,783 --> 01:25:30,411
Nothing.
I remember the fucking absinthe shots and then that's it.
1915
01:25:30,494 --> 01:25:34,999
I'm so bummed, that was gonna be spank
fodder for the next 20 years of my life.
1916
01:25:35,082 --> 01:25:36,291
Total fucking blackout.
1917
01:25:36,291 --> 01:25:37,501
Thank God
1918
01:25:37,584 --> 01:25:38,877
Amen.
1919
01:25:38,961 --> 01:25:40,128
I got something for you.
1920
01:25:40,212 --> 01:25:41,296
Holy shit!
1921
01:25:41,296 --> 01:25:42,380
Dougie.
1922
01:25:42,464 --> 01:25:44,215
I did it.
I got more coming for everybody else.
1923
01:25:44,299 --> 01:25:46,176
Oh, my God, dude,
this is major.
1924
01:25:46,259 --> 01:25:51,013
I wanted hat,
but he was so passionate about no hat.
1925
01:25:51,097 --> 01:25:52,139
No fucking hat.
1926
01:25:52,139 --> 01:25:53,182
Good shit, man.
1927
01:25:53,265 --> 01:25:55,476
Altough, I still would've Photoshopped in the dudes
1928
01:25:55,559 --> 01:25:57,811
schnizzing on your face.
But it's just me.
1929
01:25:57,895 --> 01:25:59,396
You made fucking shirts.
Fuck.
1930
01:25:59,479 --> 01:26:01,982
Yeah. Hey, Willow,
grab one of those.
1931
01:26:02,065 --> 01:26:03,984
It's blue and pink,
my favorite.
1932
01:26:04,067 --> 01:26:05,568
A medium. Awesome.
1933
01:26:05,568 --> 01:26:07,070
Well, well, well,
It's the Breakfast Club.
1934
01:26:07,153 --> 01:26:09,947
Oh, there he is.
Sam Rockwell.
1935
01:26:10,031 --> 01:26:12,324
Ha, yeah,
there you go.
1936
01:26:14,076 --> 01:26:16,412
Thank you, I'm sorry, and you're welcome.
1937
01:26:19,164 --> 01:26:20,415
Still a little sore.
1938
01:26:23,835 --> 01:26:24,961
Hi.
1939
01:26:26,254 --> 01:26:28,881
Yeah, I think we're headed down shortly.
1940
01:26:29,715 --> 01:26:31,592
Yeah, I'll see you there.
1941
01:26:32,635 --> 01:26:33,886
That was Kelly.
1942
01:26:33,886 --> 01:26:35,137
Slut.
1943
01:26:36,138 --> 01:26:38,432
Uh, she's, uh,
1944
01:26:38,432 --> 01:26:40,767
headed to the beach. I'm gonna meet her.
1945
01:26:39,766 --> 01:26:42,852
That's gonna be some awkward shit.
I wanna be front-row center.
1946
01:26:42,936 --> 01:26:44,646
Let's do it.
I'm there.
1947
01:26:46,022 --> 01:26:48,149
Give the ticks a goodbye hug for me, please?
1948
01:26:48,232 --> 01:26:49,275
I will do so.
1949
01:26:49,275 --> 01:26:50,318
Okay.
1950
01:26:55,739 --> 01:26:59,242
I can stay here and hang out with you if...
1951
01:26:59,326 --> 01:27:01,161
Yeah, yes.
1952
01:27:01,286 --> 01:27:02,454
Okay, heh.
1953
01:27:02,537 --> 01:27:05,999
We could, uh,
take a dip in the pool or something.
1954
01:27:06,082 --> 01:27:08,209
Oh, the... Yeah.
I don't know about the pool
1955
01:27:08,251 --> 01:27:10,503
after what happened in there last night.
1956
01:27:12,129 --> 01:27:15,007
But you wanna do the crossword with me?
1957
01:27:15,758 --> 01:27:17,176
I'd love that.
1958
01:27:19,303 --> 01:27:21,138
Uh, 16 Across.
1959
01:27:22,889 --> 01:27:25,975
So, what happened with, uh, you-know-who?
1960
01:27:26,059 --> 01:27:27,769
Marcus apologized for everything.
1961
01:27:27,769 --> 01:27:29,270
He wants to go to couples therapy.
1962
01:27:29,270 --> 01:27:30,563
You're getting back together?
1963
01:27:30,646 --> 01:27:33,858
We're gonna go to city hall,
get married, see if we can make it work.
1964
01:27:33,941 --> 01:27:34,942
What the fuck?
1965
01:27:34,942 --> 01:27:35,943
Just kidding.
1966
01:27:37,361 --> 01:27:41,406
Okay. Yeah, no,
it's totally over.
1967
01:27:41,490 --> 01:27:43,491
Nice.
I'm proud of you.
1968
01:27:43,575 --> 01:27:44,909
Thanks, Sue.
1969
01:27:44,993 --> 01:27:47,412
That's too bad.
I always liked that guy.
1970
01:27:48,037 --> 01:27:50,206
God, I hope Kate has some guys for us.
1971
01:27:50,289 --> 01:27:52,416
Hell, I'd even go to Hoboken.
1972
01:27:52,500 --> 01:27:55,711
I mean, if he's really amazing,
I'd consider going to Jersey City.
1973
01:27:55,794 --> 01:27:56,920
Oh, you would not.
1974
01:27:57,004 --> 01:27:59,089
I'm just making a point.
1975
01:27:59,172 --> 01:28:01,925
Uh, so Eric, um,
last night,
1976
01:28:02,008 --> 01:28:03,635
Some things came up.
1977
01:28:03,718 --> 01:28:06,262
Yeah, I swear.
I had no idea.
1978
01:28:05,762 --> 01:28:08,056
No, it's fine, really.
It was just something
1979
01:28:08,139 --> 01:28:10,183
that I needed to get out of my system.
1980
01:28:17,481 --> 01:28:19,358
I hope she likes my sloppy seconds.
1981
01:28:19,441 --> 01:28:21,401
Oh, come on.
1982
01:28:22,360 --> 01:28:23,862
Morning, Kelly.
1983
01:28:23,862 --> 01:28:25,405
Hey. Morning, Eric.
1984
01:28:25,488 --> 01:28:27,323
Hey.
1985
01:28:27,407 --> 01:28:29,367
Hi Kelly, I'm Mike.
We haven't officially met.
1986
01:28:29,450 --> 01:28:30,535
Nice to meet you.
1987
01:28:30,535 --> 01:28:31,661
Oh, wait, Mike.
1988
01:28:31,744 --> 01:28:34,872
Right.
You're the guy that Dody was asking about.
1989
01:28:34,955 --> 01:28:38,500
She wanted your number for some
kind of business thing or something?
1990
01:28:40,502 --> 01:28:43,004
Ah, what the fuck.
Give her my digits, all right?
1991
01:28:43,088 --> 01:28:45,215
Nice to meet you.
1992
01:28:45,298 --> 01:28:49,010
Let loose the Kraken.
Yeah.
1993
01:28:49,093 --> 01:28:51,929
So wow. Okay.
1994
01:28:51,929 --> 01:28:52,930
About last night.
1995
01:28:52,930 --> 01:28:53,806
How about this?
1996
01:28:53,806 --> 01:28:54,515
What?
1997
01:28:54,515 --> 01:28:56,308
How about this about last night?
1998
01:28:57,017 --> 01:29:00,145
We never talk about it ever, ever again.
1999
01:29:00,145 --> 01:29:01,771
It never happened.
All right?
2000
01:29:02,355 --> 01:29:04,149
You and I have just met.
2001
01:29:04,274 --> 01:29:06,734
We're starting fresh right here,
right now.
2002
01:29:08,277 --> 01:29:09,821
Done.
2003
01:29:11,280 --> 01:29:12,281
Hi, I'm Kelly.
2004
01:29:12,281 --> 01:29:13,365
Hi, Kelly. I'm Eric.
2005
01:29:13,365 --> 01:29:13,991
It's nice to meet you.
2006
01:29:13,991 --> 01:29:14,825
Nice to meet you.
2007
01:29:26,294 --> 01:29:27,503
Hey!
2008
01:29:33,676 --> 01:29:35,886
Your blackberry!
2009
01:29:35,678 --> 01:29:38,430
Ah!
Just an empty symbolic gesture.
2010
01:29:38,555 --> 01:29:40,098
I'm getting a new one on Tuesday.
2011
01:29:40,432 --> 01:29:43,184
But that did
feel really, really good.
2012
01:29:43,393 --> 01:29:46,187
So this is the beach, huh?
2013
01:29:45,687 --> 01:29:47,230
Pretty beautiful.
Who knew?
2014
01:29:47,355 --> 01:29:48,356
This is it.
2015
01:29:48,356 --> 01:29:49,315
Let's go on.
2016
01:29:55,070 --> 01:29:56,864
Okay, listen. I've got some bad news.
2017
01:29:56,864 --> 01:29:57,948
You're al Qaeda.
2018
01:29:57,948 --> 01:29:58,699
No.
2019
01:29:58,699 --> 01:30:01,076
You know the delay I pulled with closing the house?
2020
01:30:01,201 --> 01:30:03,161
It spooked the buyers and they pulled out.
2021
01:30:04,746 --> 01:30:05,538
The house isn't sold, yet?
2022
01:30:05,538 --> 01:30:06,039
No.
2023
01:30:08,374 --> 01:30:09,375
Are you mad?
2024
01:30:09,375 --> 01:30:10,334
No. No, no, no.
2025
01:30:10,459 --> 01:30:12,003
Will you hold on a sec though?
2026
01:30:12,128 --> 01:30:12,712
Hey, guys!
2027
01:30:12,712 --> 01:30:13,295
Yeah?
2028
01:30:13,420 --> 01:30:16,048
Quick announcement.
I have a really shitty Realtor.
2029
01:30:16,173 --> 01:30:17,174
Fire her!
2030
01:30:17,174 --> 01:30:18,175
And she blew the deal.
2031
01:30:18,300 --> 01:30:20,177
And the house still isn't sold.
2032
01:30:24,639 --> 01:30:25,306
They're pissed.
2033
01:30:25,306 --> 01:30:25,932
They're really mad.
2034
01:30:26,057 --> 01:30:27,183
Great, now they're pissed.
2035
01:30:27,183 --> 01:30:28,267
They're mad.
2036
01:30:28,393 --> 01:30:32,021
Now I got shirt thinking of
something to do for Memorial Day.
2037
01:30:32,146 --> 01:30:34,648
We've been kicking around this idea for a brown party.
2038
01:30:34,773 --> 01:30:36,817
You know brown clothes,
brown food.
2039
01:30:38,777 --> 01:30:40,904
Hey, you guys remember Kelly, right?
2040
01:31:20,565 --> 01:31:21,733
What do you want?
2041
01:31:21,858 --> 01:31:23,568
Password's roundelay.
2042
01:31:23,693 --> 01:31:24,819
Who's your connection?
2043
01:31:24,944 --> 01:31:26,571
Dody Henderson. She's our Realtor.
2044
01:31:26,571 --> 01:31:28,781
Oh, Dody. Yeah, she's in the swing.
2045
01:31:28,781 --> 01:31:31,367
Come on in.
Come on, you too.
2046
01:31:34,995 --> 01:31:36,288
Yeah. Okay.
2047
01:32:21,037 --> 01:32:22,998
You say he's just a friend
2048
01:32:23,123 --> 01:32:26,125
Oh, baby, you
2049
01:32:26,251 --> 01:32:29,045
You got what I need
2050
01:32:29,170 --> 01:32:30,254
What?!
2051
01:32:30,379 --> 01:32:32,214
But you say He's just a friend
2052
01:32:32,339 --> 01:32:35,050
What, what But you say he's just a friend
2053
01:32:35,175 --> 01:32:37,636
Oh, baby you
144789
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