Original subtitles

Grr!

(Music playing)

(Grunts)

Wow! That was great! At least I assume it was.

It's all just noise to me.

And now, we reached out to the good people at StuffMart

to give away free big-screen TVs to our studio audience!

(Cheering)

Unfortunately, they declined.

But we did spring for a prize for one of ya.

So check under your seats to see if you're the lucky winner!

- Aw, man. Nothing. - Bupkis.

I found this crummy lamp. We can use it to look for the prize.

I think the lamp is the prize, Knuckles.

I won! Hey, everybody, check out my sweet lamp!

A lamp? Really? I guess the rest of the prize budget

- went to my ex-wife's lawyer. - (Laughter)

That wasn't a joke.

So, where you guys wanna take this lamp party next?

(Yawns) Actually, Knuckles, I'm a little tired.

- I'm gonna head home. - Yeah.

- Me too. - I haven't slept in 28 days.

Home, huh? A home would be the perfect place

to plug in my new floor lamp.

But where could I find one of those?

I couldn't help but overhear your predicament.

I just happen to be an unlicensed real-estate agent.

I could find your dream house... for a nominal fee, of course.

What do you think, I was born yesterday?

Because, if so, this is a great belated birthday gift!

Breathtaking, isn't it?

- There's a hole in the ceiling. - We call that a sunroof!

- But what if it rains? - Instant waterfall!

You like nature, right?

It's what is says in my character description.

We'll take it! Do you accept bottle caps

- and seashells as payment? - Ew...

I mean, good news!

You've just been pre-qualified for a line of credit!

Just need you to initial here, here, and here.

And sign on the line here, and again here.

And in triplicate here. And we're done!

As soon as you sign over here, and initial here and here.

Congratulations! Let me give you your keys.

You just need to jimmy the lock a bit.

Home sweet home. Now, time to get my light on!

Hmm. Maybe it takes a while to warm up.

- We got your distress signal! - My lamp isn't working.

Once you pay the electric bill, this lamp will work just fine.

Though this place probably looks better with the lights off.

Bills, eh? How am I supposed to pay those?

(Crash)

I'm here to apply for a job.

I have a real passion for li-berries.

All berries, for that matter!

Actually, it's pronounced library.

No, I'm pretty sure you're wrong.

Shall we consult the dictionary?

Oh, I can't read.

People buy things. I need someone to box those things.

Can you handle putting stuff in boxes?

Sounds pretty complicated.

Just have to... crush... these... eggs!

(Sighs)

- Who did this? - It was me. I'll clean it up.

Don't you dare! Such verisimilitude!

It's so... "outside the box."

We could use a creative type like you at my ad agency.

- Come work for me. - I'm in!

I could never work at a place like this.

Your store is a mess, sir!

Hello, I'm here for the business?

- Who let the vagrant in? - Gunther, Pierre!

Meet Knuckles, our new creative executive.

Grr!

Creative executive?

But Diane, his briefcase is filled with chicken fingers.

He's exploring new ways to package, carry, and consume

breaded chicken product.

I don't see you revolutionising the chicken-finger industry.

Knuckles, you just missed the most epic Eggman battle!

It was the perfect blend of new minions

and classic favourites from years past!

Easily the most action-packed battle we've ever had!

And you missed it.

That's what you get for following Knuckles around.

Oh, man...

No, I'm a working echidna now.

I've got a nine-to-five desk job.

And anyone who would rather watch that than an epic battle

can come with me!

Knuckles, excellent job on the Meat Pellet account.

You'll notice a bonus on your paycheck.

But I did all the work on the Meat Pellet account!

Great job delegating, Knuckles.

Knuckles!

- (Growling) - So, where's my money?

- You seem to be a little short. - That's not what the fans say.

I'd hate to have to foreclose on this house

and any lamps therein.

No! I'll pay! I promise!

- Just don't hurt the lamp! - Next week,

there better be a lot more. Or else...

But how am I gonna get more money?

Welcome, New Employee's Name Here, to Meh Burger,

where the customer's always...

Well, that's gotta be a misprint.

Let's get something straight right now, greenhorn.

I'm junior shift manager around here,

and that means you do my bidding!

Now, mop up what I hope is just a chunky milkshake! Ew!

Aw...

Knuckles, you look awful.

Like you were run over by the ugly truck.

I think what Sticks is trying to say

is you can't keep working two full-time jobs.

- You gotta quit one of 'em. - No. I was trying to say

the ugly-truck driver should to lose his licence.

I guess I could leave Meh Burger.

I knew you could quit if you put your mind to it!

- (Growling) - (Gulps)

The work we did today is going to really make a difference

in convincing people to buy stuff they don't need.

How about we all go out and celebrate?

Actually, I have other plans.

Real ones, not fake ones that I'm making up.

See ya guys tomorrow.

(Evil laugh) Just try and stop me,

you spiny blue squirrel!

Knuckles! Good! You're off work!

Oh, right. Off work. Sure.

(Gasps)

Oh, no! It knocked me over this way!

One minute late. That's coming out of your pay.

Welcome to Meh Burger. Gah!

Knuckles, you decided to join us after all.

Uh... yeah!

Here, I saved you a seat.

Wow, look at that sunrise.

I'm ready to take your order now!

Ah!

Aaah!

Thanks, Knuckles. I thought I was a goner.

You know, in times like these,

you start to gain perspective -

Yeah, yeah, sounds life-changing. Gotta go!

Why are you mopping?

Are you focus-testing a new mop product

on the most disgusting floor imaginable?

Uh... Yes?

Brilliance! Report your findings to me tomorrow.

But for now, join us. And where are our French fries?

(Sighs)

Huh?

Aaah!

Aaah!

Here you go, sir. Now, excuse me,

I have to go help out in that battle.

What the... ? Can I at least have some ketchup?

Aaah!

Take that, you egg-shaped fiend!

(Gasps) Did you just attack Gunther?

(Gasps) Did you just knock over a display of cups?

Oh, yeah, and assault a customer, I guess.

Oops. Sorry.

- You're fired! - You're fired!

I thought you were gonna quit one of your jobs.

And I thought you said I was gonna quit one of my jobs.

The ol' Knuckles switcheroo right back at ya.

Why didn't you tell us you were being strong-armed by Barker?

Because of the non-disclosure clause

in the contract he signed, of which he is now in violation.

Let me see that.

These terms are ridiculous.

"Bananaganza, Wofflecufter, Dinkleflax?"

Also the details of this contract

are quite unfavourable to Knuckles.

Hey, a deal's a deal.

Oh, yeah? Well, let me make you a deal, bozo.

I'm gonna be watching you.

People think I'm the cute one, the girly one.

"Oh, sweet, little, adorable Amy Rose.

Wonder what kind of cake she's baking today?"

I blend in, buddy. But I carry a big hammer

and I never forget!

Whoa, Amy. Take it easy.

Do you know what I do to my enemies?

I crush them and I eat them for breakfast,

even when I already ate breakfast and brunch!

So do not push me and don't mess with my friends!

Grr!

Fine! You're out of your contract.

Just keep that pink nutjob away from me!

(Growling)

(Whimpering)

You're free and clear. Sorry you can't keep the house.

That's OK. I like being a nomad.

I just needed somewhere to keep my lamp.

If that's all you want, why not keep it in my workshop?

You can come visit it any time you like.

(Sighs) Good night, lamp.

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