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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:47,536 --> 00:00:49,970 Trust me, I know what I'm doing. 2 00:00:59,376 --> 00:01:02,686 'Hammer, ever thought about taking up meditation? 3 00:01:02,776 --> 00:01:05,449 'It might controI your aggressive tendencies. ' 4 00:01:05,536 --> 00:01:09,324 What, are you brain dead?! 5 00:01:09,416 --> 00:01:12,772 - What was that, Doreau? - Sledge, look, trouble. 6 00:01:12,856 --> 00:01:15,848 Why don't these deadbeats get jobs? 7 00:01:15,936 --> 00:01:20,327 How long's he been up there? 8 00:01:20,416 --> 00:01:24,728 - Police officer. What's going on? - That man says he's going to jump. 9 00:01:26,576 --> 00:01:29,613 - I'll get a bullhorn, talk him down. - I can handle this. 10 00:01:30,376 --> 00:01:31,934 Hammer! 11 00:01:46,736 --> 00:01:50,934 Another life saved. And I still have one bullet left. 12 00:01:51,616 --> 00:01:57,532 Can we stop at my bank? I'll get some cash, then you can buy me breakfast. 13 00:02:17,416 --> 00:02:19,566 'Have a nice day. ' 14 00:02:22,656 --> 00:02:24,612 This'll just take a second. 15 00:02:30,296 --> 00:02:35,211 'Transaction cannot be processed at this time due to insufficient funds. ' 16 00:02:35,296 --> 00:02:39,289 Listen, sucker, you need some reprogramming. 17 00:02:40,896 --> 00:02:45,253 Hammer, please! Blowing away this machine won't solve anything. 18 00:02:45,336 --> 00:02:49,295 Let's go inside and straighten this out like civiI human beings. 19 00:02:52,936 --> 00:02:54,494 Thank you. 20 00:02:58,096 --> 00:02:59,449 'Ouch!' 21 00:02:59,536 --> 00:03:03,324 I'm saying this for the third and last time. 22 00:03:03,416 --> 00:03:05,725 We are foreclosing on your home. 23 00:03:05,816 --> 00:03:09,695 You have three days to pack up and vacate said premises. 24 00:03:11,896 --> 00:03:13,852 What are you? Deaf? 25 00:03:17,856 --> 00:03:21,690 Oh, and don't forget your free banking bunny. 26 00:03:21,776 --> 00:03:24,210 Now, remember, three days. 27 00:03:30,056 --> 00:03:32,365 How may I help you? 28 00:03:32,456 --> 00:03:37,371 Well, HaI 9000 out there tells me I have insufficient funds in my account. 29 00:03:37,736 --> 00:03:39,886 - It's screwed up. - I'm sorry, sir. 30 00:03:39,976 --> 00:03:45,369 - Those machines never make mistakes. - Look, I made a deposit two days ago. 31 00:03:45,456 --> 00:03:47,572 I want my money! 32 00:03:47,656 --> 00:03:50,568 All right, sir, I'll check it out. 33 00:03:52,296 --> 00:03:55,129 Your friend's high strung, isn't he? 34 00:03:55,216 --> 00:03:57,525 Your name, please. 35 00:03:57,616 --> 00:04:01,655 - Sledge Hammer. - Sledge... Hammer. 36 00:04:01,736 --> 00:04:04,250 Where were you born? A tooI shed? 37 00:04:05,736 --> 00:04:08,694 You think that's funny? You can do better than that. 38 00:04:08,776 --> 00:04:11,529 I'm not as easy an audience as the old lady 39 00:04:11,616 --> 00:04:14,005 so go ahead, make me laugh 40 00:04:14,096 --> 00:04:16,007 or I'll have you in stitches! 41 00:04:16,096 --> 00:04:20,533 Hammer, let him go. Remember what I said - civiI human being. 42 00:04:24,416 --> 00:04:28,011 All right, I do want one of those bank bunnies. 43 00:04:28,096 --> 00:04:30,564 Freeze! This is a hold-up! 44 00:04:30,656 --> 00:04:33,409 Put your hands on your head or I'll blow 'em away, 45 00:04:33,496 --> 00:04:37,250 then you'll have no place to put your hands! 46 00:04:44,416 --> 00:04:46,372 Back up! Back up! 47 00:04:49,016 --> 00:04:50,574 Come on! 48 00:04:51,496 --> 00:04:55,808 Hey, kid, I thought I told you to put your hands on top of your head. 49 00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:58,854 I can't, mister, I'm holding my piggy bank. 50 00:05:01,056 --> 00:05:04,890 - Mom! - Now you're not holding nothin'! 51 00:05:05,896 --> 00:05:08,933 That yoghurt-sucking mutant! 52 00:05:09,016 --> 00:05:11,450 I'm gonna close his account. 53 00:05:11,536 --> 00:05:14,209 - Get outta my way! - I'll have that. 54 00:05:17,176 --> 00:05:18,928 My gun was in that purse. 55 00:05:20,416 --> 00:05:22,976 - Move over! - Come on, Cliff, hurry up! 56 00:05:23,056 --> 00:05:26,844 I thought I told you not to use first names, Lou! 57 00:05:26,936 --> 00:05:28,892 Er... sorry. 58 00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:33,454 Hammer, hold off! There are two of them. 59 00:05:34,296 --> 00:05:37,572 You're right. And I only have one bullet left. 60 00:05:37,656 --> 00:05:41,649 But don't ever touch my hand when I'm going for my gun! 61 00:05:42,736 --> 00:05:46,172 Only a very disturbed person would say something like that. 62 00:05:46,256 --> 00:05:49,931 Hey, look, paI, huh? Spending money for Rio! 63 00:05:54,416 --> 00:05:58,375 - We gotta do something. - I know. My arms are cramping up. 64 00:05:59,856 --> 00:06:02,893 Must be a silent alarm around here somewhere. 65 00:06:19,776 --> 00:06:21,732 Hit the silent alarm. 66 00:06:22,296 --> 00:06:24,252 Hit the silent alarm! 67 00:06:47,096 --> 00:06:49,656 Why don't you hit the silent alarm? 68 00:06:53,696 --> 00:06:56,768 Because we don't have a silent alarm, sir. 69 00:06:59,616 --> 00:07:01,368 Get outta the way! 70 00:07:04,416 --> 00:07:07,294 Cops. And they're multiplying. 71 00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:18,494 Wow! How'd they get here so fast? 72 00:07:18,576 --> 00:07:22,285 There's a doughnut shop around the corner. 73 00:07:30,256 --> 00:07:32,645 All right, brief me on the situation. 74 00:07:32,736 --> 00:07:35,489 Two gunmen are holding about a dozen hostages 75 00:07:35,576 --> 00:07:38,534 and I think Inspector Sledge Hammer's inside. 76 00:07:38,616 --> 00:07:41,813 - Why do you say that? - Isn't that his car? 77 00:07:42,976 --> 00:07:46,127 That's it, all right. Oh, those poor people! 78 00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:49,174 - The hostages, sir? - No, the robbers. 79 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:55,608 Here, folks, is the man who set off the alarm. 80 00:07:57,096 --> 00:07:59,849 - A regular hero. - Oh, I wouldn't call myself a hero. 81 00:07:59,936 --> 00:08:02,655 - That's a word that's bandied about... - Shut up. 82 00:08:02,736 --> 00:08:07,730 - You might just say concerned citizen. - Look, I'm just itching to blow you away. 83 00:08:07,816 --> 00:08:11,809 - I know the feeling. - So don't push me! 84 00:08:11,896 --> 00:08:16,208 Or you'll pay, understand? Now, say yes. No! Say, "Yes, sir. " 85 00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:20,412 Yes... 86 00:08:25,656 --> 00:08:26,611 sir. 87 00:08:35,376 --> 00:08:39,335 Dori Doreau, it didn't count. I had my fingers crossed! 88 00:08:40,176 --> 00:08:42,849 How's it coming with that phone line? 89 00:08:43,776 --> 00:08:45,732 We're hooked up, sir. 90 00:08:51,576 --> 00:08:57,492 No! I want golden boy to answer it. He's gonna be my new secretary. 91 00:08:57,576 --> 00:09:02,650 - My shorthand isn't really up to snuff... - Just answer the phone! Pick it up. 92 00:09:05,136 --> 00:09:07,411 2nd NationaI Bank. Hostage speaking. 93 00:09:07,496 --> 00:09:11,694 Hammer, this is Trunk. Have they hurt anyone? 94 00:09:12,456 --> 00:09:14,890 - No. - Have YOU hurt anyone? 95 00:09:16,296 --> 00:09:17,729 Not yet. 96 00:09:17,816 --> 00:09:22,253 I don't want you to endanger any people's lives, you understand me? 97 00:09:22,336 --> 00:09:25,009 Put one of the slimy thugs on. 98 00:09:25,096 --> 00:09:28,406 Slimy thug, it's the police. For you. 99 00:09:29,816 --> 00:09:34,048 - And don't tie it up too long cos... - Get over there, wise guy! 100 00:09:34,136 --> 00:09:36,331 Yep? What? 101 00:09:36,416 --> 00:09:39,374 Listen, this is Captain Trunk. 102 00:09:39,456 --> 00:09:42,971 Come out and give yourselves up. Let's end this peacefully. 103 00:09:43,056 --> 00:09:46,765 You think we're fools? We step outside, you blow us away! 104 00:09:46,856 --> 00:09:51,088 - I saw Dog Day Afternoon. - 'Listen, that's not gonna happen. ' 105 00:09:51,176 --> 00:09:55,374 As a show of good faith, send some of the hostages out. 106 00:09:55,456 --> 00:09:57,208 Great idea 107 00:09:57,296 --> 00:10:01,130 I'll send 'em out. In body bags... pig! 108 00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:16,369 Here's your coffee... sir. 109 00:10:16,456 --> 00:10:18,412 Thanks, sweetheart. 110 00:10:21,336 --> 00:10:23,292 This guy is dead meat! 111 00:10:24,216 --> 00:10:28,129 One bullet, two scum-suckers. Decisions, decisions, huh? 112 00:10:28,216 --> 00:10:30,776 Just have to figure out how to do it. 113 00:10:30,856 --> 00:10:33,689 - Do what? - Get 'em to stand in single file. 114 00:10:39,536 --> 00:10:42,255 - Hey, mister, I'm hungry. - I'm hungry, too. 115 00:10:42,336 --> 00:10:47,330 - Yeah, we're hungry, too! - OK, OK, we'll get some food. 116 00:10:47,416 --> 00:10:50,214 - Everybody like pizza? - Yeah! 117 00:10:50,296 --> 00:10:53,732 I am actually on a rather strict macrobiotic diet. 118 00:10:56,376 --> 00:11:01,052 Well, unless it's pepperoni cos in that case... I love any kind of... 119 00:11:01,136 --> 00:11:04,412 Or.. er... fish. Pizza would be great. 120 00:11:11,416 --> 00:11:13,566 OK, Greg, you know what to do. 121 00:11:17,496 --> 00:11:19,771 - He's clean. - All right. 122 00:11:19,856 --> 00:11:22,575 Take those pizzas and put 'em on that desk. 123 00:11:24,016 --> 00:11:26,610 Nice and slow. 124 00:11:57,856 --> 00:12:01,565 We ask for pizza, they send you a guy with a gun! He's a cop! 125 00:12:01,656 --> 00:12:05,410 Not necessarily. Competition between pizza joints is fierce. 126 00:12:05,496 --> 00:12:07,452 Shut the heck up. 127 00:12:08,576 --> 00:12:13,047 Get up! Listen, pig, you tell Trunk we want a plane outta here. 128 00:12:13,136 --> 00:12:16,890 If he doesn't agree in two minutes, I'm killing somebody. 129 00:12:16,976 --> 00:12:18,887 Now, out! 130 00:12:28,776 --> 00:12:31,336 Now, I need a volunteer. 131 00:12:32,336 --> 00:12:36,534 We all know who the volunteer is. Is there any question? I don't think so. 132 00:12:36,616 --> 00:12:39,972 Figures our hero would volunteer to be the first to go! 133 00:12:40,056 --> 00:12:43,128 - What did I tell you? - I've been waiting to do this all day. 134 00:12:43,216 --> 00:12:45,411 Come on down! 135 00:12:46,296 --> 00:12:51,165 Stop! I'm a police officer. I should be in that chair, not him. 136 00:12:51,256 --> 00:12:54,931 - Shoot me first. - Wait a minute, lady, I volunteered. 137 00:12:58,176 --> 00:13:01,134 Huh! Turn around! 138 00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,892 - Get in the chair! - Here's your chance. 139 00:13:05,976 --> 00:13:07,534 Move! 140 00:13:09,216 --> 00:13:15,325 Well, sissy, it looks like this foxy cop just saved your life. 141 00:13:15,416 --> 00:13:18,772 She's more of a man than you are. Move! 142 00:13:18,856 --> 00:13:21,211 Cover him, cover him. Relax. 143 00:13:53,936 --> 00:13:57,406 Attention in there. We will meet your demands. 144 00:13:57,496 --> 00:13:59,248 All right! 145 00:13:59,336 --> 00:14:04,456 We're all free! We're on our way to Rio! You thought I was a fooI! 146 00:14:08,696 --> 00:14:12,450 Boy, if this keeps up, I'm gonna have to take a cold shower! 147 00:14:14,416 --> 00:14:17,374 Hey, where do you think you're going, sweet-lips? 148 00:14:17,456 --> 00:14:21,608 If there's anything I hate worse than a cop, it's a chick who's a cop. 149 00:14:21,696 --> 00:14:25,689 - What have you got against cops? - My old lady was a cop. 150 00:14:25,776 --> 00:14:28,131 My mother the cop! 151 00:14:28,216 --> 00:14:32,528 Know what it feels like to be breast fed by a person in a shoulder holster? 152 00:14:32,616 --> 00:14:37,895 So robbing banks is your sad, demented way of getting back at your mother. 153 00:14:38,736 --> 00:14:41,296 Yeah... maybe you're right. 154 00:14:42,616 --> 00:14:48,248 I never opened up to anyone before. Rather ironic that I must shoot you now. 155 00:14:48,336 --> 00:14:53,569 Listen, creep, take my advice. You got what you want, you're almost outta here. 156 00:14:53,656 --> 00:14:56,773 Don't blow it by doing something stupid. 157 00:14:56,856 --> 00:14:59,131 Yeah... maybe you're right. 158 00:15:00,296 --> 00:15:04,687 But don't ever touch my hand when I'm going for my gun. 159 00:15:21,176 --> 00:15:23,326 Secure the bus. Hurry up. 160 00:15:26,816 --> 00:15:30,889 All right, listen up in there, toads. 161 00:15:30,976 --> 00:15:35,849 Your transportation has arrived. 162 00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:40,885 - I ain't holding hands with another guy. - Just do it, jerk! 163 00:15:44,656 --> 00:15:47,568 All right, come on. Move out, come on. Move. 164 00:15:47,656 --> 00:15:49,965 Come on, come on! Move it. 165 00:15:50,056 --> 00:15:52,775 Keep going, keep going. That's good. 166 00:15:52,856 --> 00:15:56,690 Come on! Out, out! Come on! Come on, move it! 167 00:15:56,776 --> 00:15:59,131 Come on. Don't crowd me. 168 00:15:59,216 --> 00:16:04,336 That's right, move. Come on, let's go. Come on. Wait, wait a minute. 169 00:16:04,416 --> 00:16:06,725 - I can't believe it, Captain. - What? 170 00:16:06,816 --> 00:16:10,809 - Hammer's holding hands with a man. - Very interesting. 171 00:16:11,496 --> 00:16:13,532 Run, kid, run! 172 00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:18,567 Get in the bus, get in the bus! 173 00:16:29,056 --> 00:16:34,005 See, we're almost home free, Lou, huh? Your sister can have that operation now. 174 00:16:35,976 --> 00:16:38,968 Drive like your life depended on it, baby, 175 00:16:39,056 --> 00:16:41,012 because it does. 176 00:16:42,416 --> 00:16:45,408 Do you mind? You're blocking the rear-view. 177 00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:50,215 Get that plane as far away from the terminaI as you possibly can. 178 00:16:50,296 --> 00:16:54,653 Sir, I don't wanna second guess you, but to just give in to them like this. 179 00:16:54,736 --> 00:16:58,285 Mayjoy, they've got a plane, a tank full of fueI, 180 00:16:58,376 --> 00:17:01,368 but no one ever said anything about a pilot. 181 00:17:16,216 --> 00:17:20,494 Your buddy mentioned something about your sister needing an operation. 182 00:17:20,576 --> 00:17:23,613 - That's too bad. - Yeah, it's tough. 183 00:17:23,696 --> 00:17:28,053 She's only 16. I never really thought her nose was that big. 184 00:17:30,096 --> 00:17:32,894 98 bottles of beer on the wall 185 00:17:32,976 --> 00:17:35,171 98 bottles of beer 186 00:17:35,256 --> 00:17:40,808 You take one down, pass it around 97 bottles of beer on the wall 187 00:17:40,896 --> 00:17:44,684 - 97 bottles of beer... - All of you, shut up already! 188 00:17:44,776 --> 00:17:46,528 We're here. 189 00:17:51,976 --> 00:17:55,935 Have you noticed there's something important missing from this plane? 190 00:17:56,016 --> 00:17:59,167 Those teeny little liquor bottles, the little... 191 00:18:00,136 --> 00:18:02,092 There's no pilot! 192 00:18:07,656 --> 00:18:12,172 Everything's under controI, Chief. They're not going anywhere. 193 00:18:21,856 --> 00:18:23,812 No pilot, huh? 194 00:18:26,336 --> 00:18:28,770 I didn't see a pilot. Who's flying this plane? 195 00:18:28,856 --> 00:18:32,610 'Good afternoon. This is your pilot Cliff speaking. ' 196 00:18:32,696 --> 00:18:36,848 - That answer your question? - Please, please, help me! I'm scared! 197 00:18:36,936 --> 00:18:39,086 Get off! 198 00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:45,812 Hit him! 199 00:18:49,096 --> 00:18:53,055 - You enjoyed that, didn't you, Doreau? - Get to the cockpit, Hammer! 200 00:18:59,576 --> 00:19:01,248 Hi, honey, I'm home. 201 00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:06,808 - Flight's cancelled, maggot. - Who do you think you are? 202 00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:10,525 - Inspector Sledge Hammer. - YOU'RE with the police department? 203 00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:13,813 No, no, no, no! I AM the police department. 204 00:19:13,896 --> 00:19:16,615 - Now, let's take the plane down. - Down? 205 00:19:16,696 --> 00:19:19,369 - Yeah, that's right. - No problem! 206 00:19:27,656 --> 00:19:31,171 Ow! PainfuI, right? Ooh, wow! 207 00:19:44,576 --> 00:19:46,726 This is for that little kid's piggy bank! 208 00:19:47,736 --> 00:19:50,409 And this is for hitting me! 209 00:19:50,496 --> 00:19:52,487 And this is for calling me names! 210 00:19:53,816 --> 00:19:56,614 And this is for ordering pizza! 211 00:19:56,696 --> 00:20:00,291 And this is for making me hold hands with another guy! 212 00:20:04,216 --> 00:20:07,765 - What was that for? - That was gratuitous. 213 00:20:13,936 --> 00:20:16,894 All right, all right, hold your applause till the end. 214 00:20:16,976 --> 00:20:21,128 Sit back and relax. We should be crashing in about three minutes. 215 00:20:21,216 --> 00:20:24,765 Crashing? Oh, no! What do you mean? 216 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:33,650 Doreau, get outta here. The cockpit is for men only. 217 00:20:33,736 --> 00:20:35,886 What do you want me to do, serve coffee 218 00:20:35,976 --> 00:20:40,686 I'll take mine black. No sugar. That makes me jumpy. Just black. Ah! 219 00:20:45,896 --> 00:20:48,854 Whoa! 220 00:21:02,456 --> 00:21:07,291 I'm trying to explain to you. I've had 1,800 hours of solo flight experience. 221 00:21:08,856 --> 00:21:11,290 Hey, that's not that much! 222 00:21:18,176 --> 00:21:22,010 - All our fueI's been dumped! - I hate when that happens. 223 00:21:22,936 --> 00:21:27,054 Our only choice now is to make a crash landing. Tell the others. 224 00:21:27,136 --> 00:21:30,287 - Try and sound positive. - So what's positive? 225 00:21:30,376 --> 00:21:33,573 That not all of us are going to hell? 226 00:21:38,336 --> 00:21:44,445 Listen up, people. I got good news for everybody who bought flight insurance. 227 00:22:04,856 --> 00:22:07,211 Oh... oh! 228 00:22:07,296 --> 00:22:09,446 Ohhh! 229 00:22:16,776 --> 00:22:20,132 Whoooo! 230 00:22:20,216 --> 00:22:24,971 Boy, I don't know about your flying but your crashing is great! 231 00:22:25,056 --> 00:22:27,729 Pow! That was terrific. 232 00:22:27,816 --> 00:22:30,933 - Let's see if we have any casualties. - Right. 233 00:22:32,096 --> 00:22:34,246 Stay back or I'll cut you! 234 00:22:40,056 --> 00:22:41,614 Ahh! 235 00:22:50,416 --> 00:22:51,974 Where are we? 236 00:23:02,296 --> 00:23:06,448 You know, it's true. You are safer in a plane than on a highway. 237 00:23:14,376 --> 00:23:16,526 This freak better be fixed by now. 238 00:23:19,056 --> 00:23:23,413 'Your personaI ID number has been discontinued. 239 00:23:23,496 --> 00:23:26,056 'This card is no longer valid. ' 240 00:23:32,496 --> 00:23:35,454 Remember that last bullet? Use it. 241 00:23:35,504 --> 00:23:40,054 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 19656

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