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1
00:00:05,003 --> 00:00:07,438
What you thinking about, T?
2
00:00:07,506 --> 00:00:09,974
- The future, actually...
- Mm.
3
00:00:10,042 --> 00:00:11,876
You know, where I see
myself in ten years time.
4
00:00:11,944 --> 00:00:14,745
You know what? I think I'm
gonna be high-level FBI by then.
5
00:00:15,507 --> 00:00:17,775
I know where I'm gonna be in ten years.
6
00:00:17,843 --> 00:00:20,444
Wow. Really? You have a plan?
7
00:00:20,512 --> 00:00:22,446
- Yeah.
- I'm impressed.
8
00:00:22,514 --> 00:00:24,215
Yeah, I put a lot of thought into it too.
9
00:00:24,283 --> 00:00:25,316
Planned it out.
10
00:00:25,384 --> 00:00:27,418
- Get this.
- Yeah?
11
00:00:27,486 --> 00:00:29,220
Miami.
12
00:00:33,225 --> 00:00:36,861
And you're what... gonna be a detective?
13
00:00:36,929 --> 00:00:38,329
Yeah.
14
00:00:38,397 --> 00:00:40,698
Yeah! I'm gonna be a detective.
15
00:00:40,766 --> 00:00:42,433
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
16
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:45,169
Yes, I'm gonna be a detective in Miami!
17
00:00:45,237 --> 00:00:47,471
Man, that would be, like, so cool.
18
00:00:47,539 --> 00:00:49,373
If I was a detective in Miami, I could do
19
00:00:49,441 --> 00:00:51,108
- so many detective things.
- Yeah, you could.
20
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:52,877
And you can be pretty
damn sure of one thing.
21
00:00:52,945 --> 00:00:56,447
- What is that?
- It'll be sunny
22
00:00:56,515 --> 00:00:57,615
Yep.
23
00:00:57,683 --> 00:00:59,717
All units, armed robbery in progress.
24
00:00:59,785 --> 00:01:01,686
Northwest corner of 18th and Morgan.
25
00:01:01,753 --> 00:01:03,354
That's us.
26
00:01:03,422 --> 00:01:05,523
Car 48, ready to annihilate.
27
00:01:05,591 --> 00:01:08,659
[Siren wailing]
28
00:01:10,429 --> 00:01:11,562
[Tires screech]
29
00:01:11,630 --> 00:01:13,531
Don't move, asshole!
30
00:01:13,599 --> 00:01:14,966
Oh, why do they always move?
31
00:01:15,034 --> 00:01:16,734
Hey, drop your weapon!
32
00:01:16,802 --> 00:01:18,636
- [Gunshots]
- [Groans]
33
00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:19,637
Got him!
34
00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:21,606
Aah! Aah!
35
00:01:21,674 --> 00:01:23,908
Suspect down, corner of Morgan and 18th.
36
00:01:23,976 --> 00:01:25,743
Officer down... medical
assistance required.
37
00:01:25,811 --> 00:01:27,278
- Yo, nice shot, T.
- No.
38
00:01:27,346 --> 00:01:29,647
- He got me in the arm.
- No, no, no, you got him.
39
00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:31,816
No, he got me right in the arm.
40
00:01:31,884 --> 00:01:33,751
No, T, I'm looking at it. It looks fine.
41
00:01:33,819 --> 00:01:35,253
The arm with all the blood on it?
42
00:01:35,321 --> 00:01:37,789
I'm serious, your uniform... oh, my God!
43
00:01:37,856 --> 00:01:39,624
Oh, my God!
44
00:01:39,692 --> 00:01:41,059
Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God!
45
00:01:41,126 --> 00:01:42,660
- Okay, okay.
- Dude, it's okay. Hey.
46
00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:44,595
Papi, papi, papi. Santo Dios, hallelujah.
47
00:01:44,663 --> 00:01:46,764
Oh, my...
48
00:01:46,832 --> 00:01:48,766
[Thud]
49
00:01:48,834 --> 00:01:50,735
[Sighs]
50
00:01:50,803 --> 00:01:53,938
One officer down, one officer...
51
00:01:54,006 --> 00:01:55,940
Kind of a pussy.
52
00:02:01,180 --> 00:02:02,714
How's she doing, guys? How you doing, hon?
53
00:02:02,781 --> 00:02:04,115
Quick clot's working great.
54
00:02:04,183 --> 00:02:05,883
She won't be losing any more blood.
55
00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:07,385
Took a couple of pellets of buckshot, T.
56
00:02:07,453 --> 00:02:09,087
Don't worry... the docs
should patch you up in no time.
57
00:02:09,154 --> 00:02:10,755
Any shortness of breath, blurred vision,
58
00:02:10,823 --> 00:02:12,090
- dizziness, clammy hands?
- Um...
59
00:02:12,157 --> 00:02:13,358
Yes, yes, all of them.
60
00:02:13,425 --> 00:02:14,892
Oh, my God. Billy, I'm okay.
61
00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:16,327
I'm so sorry, T.
62
00:02:16,395 --> 00:02:18,296
It's all my fault. Madre de Dios.
63
00:02:18,364 --> 00:02:20,264
- It's not your fault, Billy.
- Just blame your parents.
64
00:02:20,332 --> 00:02:21,899
That's probably what
the shooter's gonna do.
65
00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:23,234
Are you okay, babe?
66
00:02:23,302 --> 00:02:25,069
Oh, shit, call my parents
before the precinct does
67
00:02:25,137 --> 00:02:26,771
and let them know that I'm absolutely fine.
68
00:02:26,839 --> 00:02:28,639
No, it's not fine, T.
69
00:02:28,707 --> 00:02:31,042
[Crying] You're my partner,
and I'm supposed to protect you.
70
00:02:31,110 --> 00:02:32,443
Yo soy un idiota!
71
00:02:32,511 --> 00:02:34,679
Your mouth's probably dry.
Do you want some water?
72
00:02:34,747 --> 00:02:35,913
Oh, my God, yes. Thank you.
73
00:02:35,981 --> 00:02:38,750
My mouth is so dry, I can't even breathe.
74
00:02:41,587 --> 00:02:43,888
[Mutters]
75
00:02:43,956 --> 00:02:45,890
It should be me lying there, T.
76
00:02:45,958 --> 00:02:48,426
Not you, it should be me.
77
00:02:48,494 --> 00:02:50,795
Billy should be in that bed.
78
00:02:50,863 --> 00:02:53,464
[Siren wailing]
79
00:02:56,335 --> 00:02:58,970
I hate to sedate a patient
who's not seriously injured,
80
00:02:59,038 --> 00:03:02,006
but I just couldn't take
all the goddamn whining.
81
00:03:02,074 --> 00:03:03,609
[Hip-hop music]
82
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,348
Were you scared? I know I was.
83
00:03:10,416 --> 00:03:12,183
You know what the really scary part was?
84
00:03:12,251 --> 00:03:14,819
Dealing with my parents... and Maeve.
85
00:03:14,887 --> 00:03:16,821
Did you see her hitting on that doctor?
86
00:03:16,889 --> 00:03:18,056
Yeah, I thought she was gonna blow him
87
00:03:18,123 --> 00:03:19,390
- right there in the waiting room.
- Yeah, I know.
88
00:03:19,458 --> 00:03:20,591
I know Hank wanted to.
89
00:03:20,659 --> 00:03:21,759
- Oh, he gave Hank his number.
- No!
90
00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:23,227
Mm-hmm. Classic.
91
00:03:23,295 --> 00:03:24,395
- [Laughs]
- Wow.
92
00:03:24,463 --> 00:03:26,130
- Are the Percocets working?
- Oh, yeah.
93
00:03:26,198 --> 00:03:27,231
Good.
94
00:03:27,299 --> 00:03:29,934
- How's your wound?
- What wound?
95
00:03:30,002 --> 00:03:32,270
- You all right?
- I am high as shit.
96
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,739
Okay, well, whatever you
want, I am at your service.
97
00:03:34,807 --> 00:03:35,840
You name it, you got it.
98
00:03:35,908 --> 00:03:37,308
You want ice cream,
99
00:03:37,376 --> 00:03:39,243
you want a Dwayne Johnson
film fest, whatever you want.
100
00:03:39,311 --> 00:03:41,045
Will you stay over?
101
00:03:41,113 --> 00:03:42,914
Yeah, of course.
102
00:03:42,981 --> 00:03:44,916
Cool.
103
00:03:44,983 --> 00:03:46,651
Just, you know, I don't
want to be alone tonight.
104
00:03:46,718 --> 00:03:50,221
Yeah, I totally get it.
105
00:03:50,289 --> 00:03:53,758
You know, it's okay to be, um...
106
00:03:53,826 --> 00:03:55,593
If you're afraid.
107
00:03:55,661 --> 00:03:57,328
- No, I wasn't.
- No, not at the time. No.
108
00:03:57,396 --> 00:03:58,763
I pulled one of the doctors aside,
109
00:03:58,831 --> 00:04:00,398
and he said sometimes in cases like this,
110
00:04:00,466 --> 00:04:01,966
there can be a delayed reaction.
111
00:04:02,034 --> 00:04:03,868
Sometimes people feel
more afraid afterwards.
112
00:04:03,936 --> 00:04:06,137
No... I mean, what... afraid of what?
113
00:04:06,205 --> 00:04:07,839
- Of dying.
- But I didn't die.
114
00:04:07,906 --> 00:04:09,240
- No, but you could have.
- No, but I didn't.
115
00:04:09,308 --> 00:04:10,441
I know, honey, but just...
116
00:04:10,509 --> 00:04:13,010
Hey, I am not afraid of anything, baby.
117
00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:14,712
I am...
118
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:15,880
Horny.
119
00:04:15,948 --> 00:04:17,381
I'm thirsty.
120
00:04:17,449 --> 00:04:21,752
I just want to go home and drink
a ton of really great Tequila
121
00:04:21,820 --> 00:04:25,123
and then have really insane sex.
122
00:04:25,190 --> 00:04:26,657
Ha.
123
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:29,026
- Seriously?
- Seriously.
124
00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:31,229
How was that for delayed reaction?
125
00:04:31,296 --> 00:04:33,397
[Both chuckle]
126
00:04:33,465 --> 00:04:37,068
I hate to say it, but you
should get wounded more often.
127
00:04:42,174 --> 00:04:44,108
Good morning, my love.
128
00:04:44,176 --> 00:04:47,745
I whipped you up your favorite
breakfast and a rose...
129
00:04:47,813 --> 00:04:53,050
A fresh and healing flower,
your favorite kind of...
130
00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:54,685
Okay, what... I know that look.
131
00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:56,287
- No, you don't.
- Yeah, I do.
132
00:04:56,355 --> 00:04:58,055
You have never seen this look before.
133
00:04:58,123 --> 00:04:59,557
I'm pretty sure it's the "we need to talk
134
00:04:59,625 --> 00:05:01,025
about our relationship" look.
135
00:05:01,093 --> 00:05:02,560
No?
136
00:05:02,628 --> 00:05:03,661
It's "the bullet holes in my arm
137
00:05:03,729 --> 00:05:05,196
are really starting to hurt" look?
138
00:05:05,264 --> 00:05:06,430
You don't want eggs.
139
00:05:06,498 --> 00:05:08,065
Okay, it's official. I'm scared here.
140
00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:10,334
What happened to the happy,
sexy, fun girl from last night?
141
00:05:10,402 --> 00:05:12,703
I got shot. I survived.
I wanted to celebrate.
142
00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,205
Oh, right. I'll get the Percocets.
143
00:05:14,273 --> 00:05:16,040
No, no Percocets!
144
00:05:16,108 --> 00:05:19,143
Happy, fun, sexy time,
babe, three feet away.
145
00:05:19,211 --> 00:05:21,546
Listen, I've been thinking
a lot lately about...
146
00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:23,314
Where I see myself in
ten years' time and...
147
00:05:23,382 --> 00:05:24,615
Oh, boy, I'm taking the Percocets.
148
00:05:24,683 --> 00:05:27,385
- No, wait. Hey.
- Huh?
149
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,153
- Don't you have a plan?
- What?
150
00:05:29,221 --> 00:05:30,888
Uh, yeah, I do.
151
00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:32,790
In ten years, I plan to be sitting
152
00:05:32,858 --> 00:05:35,459
in primo season-ticket-owner box seats
153
00:05:35,527 --> 00:05:37,562
right behind the Cubs Dugout
at Wrigley Field,
154
00:05:37,629 --> 00:05:39,363
thank you very much...
155
00:05:39,431 --> 00:05:40,565
With you.
156
00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:42,366
That is your ten-year plan?
157
00:05:42,434 --> 00:05:43,868
No, of course not. It's my 20-year plan.
158
00:05:43,936 --> 00:05:45,937
It took me ten years just to get
on the list for these tickets.
159
00:05:46,004 --> 00:05:47,772
- Holy crap.
- What?
160
00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:49,840
I'm a cop, John.
161
00:05:49,908 --> 00:05:51,776
I might not have ten years' time.
162
00:05:51,843 --> 00:05:54,178
I could take a bullet in
the face tomorrow morning
163
00:05:54,246 --> 00:05:56,013
from some meth-head freak
164
00:05:56,081 --> 00:05:57,815
outside of a chicken and liquor store.
165
00:05:57,883 --> 00:05:59,150
Or I could take a bullet
166
00:05:59,218 --> 00:06:01,485
in the line of duty for my country in D.C.
167
00:06:01,553 --> 00:06:03,154
- Hmm?
- I want to go to Washington
168
00:06:03,222 --> 00:06:04,922
- and work for the FBI.
- What? When?
169
00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,290
Today, now.
170
00:06:06,358 --> 00:06:07,725
I'm ready to fill out the application form.
171
00:06:07,793 --> 00:06:09,193
Okay, wait. Wait.
172
00:06:09,261 --> 00:06:11,395
Listen, I think that you
lost a lot of blood yesterday,
173
00:06:11,463 --> 00:06:13,464
and I think that you got
a shock to your system.
174
00:06:13,532 --> 00:06:14,966
What am I waiting for, huh?
175
00:06:15,033 --> 00:06:17,268
- There's nothing keeping me here.
- Easy, easy.
176
00:06:17,336 --> 00:06:19,470
That's for sure.
177
00:06:19,538 --> 00:06:20,972
Well, what about a little thing called us?
178
00:06:21,039 --> 00:06:22,540
Oh, right, us.
179
00:06:22,608 --> 00:06:25,309
Yes, there's my place,
and there's your place.
180
00:06:25,377 --> 00:06:27,178
And you know what, John?
181
00:06:27,246 --> 00:06:28,446
It's not enough anymore.
182
00:06:28,513 --> 00:06:30,081
Okay, um, I think this is the part
183
00:06:30,148 --> 00:06:31,182
the doctor was talking about.
184
00:06:31,250 --> 00:06:32,717
This is, like, a delayed reaction.
185
00:06:32,784 --> 00:06:34,919
Yes. I was 16 when I decided
I wanted to work for the FBI.
186
00:06:34,987 --> 00:06:38,556
It's only taken me a decade
to finally make the move.
187
00:06:38,624 --> 00:06:39,590
You're serious?
188
00:06:39,658 --> 00:06:40,925
Wow.
189
00:06:40,993 --> 00:06:43,894
You are so observant.
190
00:06:43,962 --> 00:06:47,732
Yes, I've only been up half
the night thinking about it.
191
00:06:47,799 --> 00:06:49,233
Marry me.
192
00:06:49,301 --> 00:06:51,135
[Laughs] Yeah, right.
193
00:06:51,203 --> 00:06:52,670
- I'm serious.
- I'm serious!
194
00:06:52,738 --> 00:06:55,039
Let's get married. Ha ha! Whoo!
195
00:06:55,107 --> 00:06:57,642
[Chuckles sarcastically] Great idea.
196
00:06:57,709 --> 00:06:59,610
Theresa Kelly...
197
00:06:59,678 --> 00:07:03,748
Theresa Kelly, will you marry me?
198
00:07:03,815 --> 00:07:05,182
You're kneeling on my pants.
199
00:07:05,250 --> 00:07:07,818
Hey, listen to me.
200
00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:12,690
I am 100% balls-out dead certain
goddamn serious right now.
201
00:07:12,758 --> 00:07:14,925
- Can you pass me my top?
- Not until you answer me.
202
00:07:14,993 --> 00:07:15,926
- Get up.
- No.
203
00:07:15,994 --> 00:07:17,795
John Farrell, get up.
204
00:07:17,863 --> 00:07:19,430
I'm not getting up.
205
00:07:19,498 --> 00:07:21,399
Okay, fine.
206
00:07:21,466 --> 00:07:24,168
So I say yes, and then we're
engaged forever and ever
207
00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:26,170
because you won't commit to a wedding date
208
00:07:26,238 --> 00:07:28,773
and then I waste a whole
another chunk of my life
209
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,908
drinking overpriced box-seat beers
210
00:07:30,976 --> 00:07:34,245
watching a team who is
cursed by a Billy Goat?
211
00:07:34,313 --> 00:07:35,680
I don't think so!
212
00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:37,181
- Let's do it right now.
- What?
213
00:07:37,249 --> 00:07:38,649
Let's get married. Right now.
214
00:07:38,717 --> 00:07:40,284
We'll go down to the
courthouse. We'll get a license.
215
00:07:40,352 --> 00:07:41,919
We'll get a justice of the peace.
216
00:07:41,987 --> 00:07:43,454
We'll get two witnesses,
and we'll make it legal...
217
00:07:43,522 --> 00:07:45,222
Right now, today,
218
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:47,525
as in this morning, as in at 8:37 A.M.
219
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,894
Are you okay?
220
00:07:49,961 --> 00:07:51,796
I've never been better.
221
00:07:51,863 --> 00:07:53,097
Are you okay? You're
the one that's been shot.
222
00:07:53,165 --> 00:07:55,066
Yeah.
223
00:07:56,802 --> 00:08:00,404
- What are you thinking about?
- Bacon.
224
00:08:05,744 --> 00:08:08,679
[Crunching]
225
00:08:11,850 --> 00:08:13,250
Let's do it.
226
00:08:20,610 --> 00:08:22,610
Maeve's in.
227
00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:23,970
She's meeting us there. Perfect.
228
00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:25,510
- Oh, my goodness.
- [Laughs]
229
00:08:25,570 --> 00:08:28,640
[Cell phone rings]
230
00:08:28,710 --> 00:08:30,440
- Yeah?
- Hey, you alone?
231
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:31,910
No, whole gang's here. Why?
232
00:08:31,980 --> 00:08:32,980
Put your poker face on.
233
00:08:33,050 --> 00:08:34,650
Oh.
234
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:40,120
I am Lady Gaga, baby. What's up?
235
00:08:40,190 --> 00:08:41,860
Theresa and I are getting married.
236
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,820
- What?
- Poker face, asshole!
237
00:08:43,890 --> 00:08:45,730
Okay, yes.
238
00:08:45,790 --> 00:08:46,990
No, I-I knew that already.
239
00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:48,960
She had told me when we got back to...
240
00:08:49,030 --> 00:08:51,600
I'm Lady Gaga again. What the hell?
241
00:08:51,670 --> 00:08:53,230
Okay, I need you to meet us
242
00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:54,940
at the courthouse on West Washington.
243
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,870
Don't tell anybody. Don't rush
out the door like a maniac.
244
00:08:56,940 --> 00:08:58,140
Just be cool.
245
00:08:58,210 --> 00:08:59,670
Is this payback for the skin-cream prank?
246
00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:01,780
- Tell Hank it's not payback.
- It's not payback.
247
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:02,910
God damn.
248
00:09:02,980 --> 00:09:04,880
Lady Gaga, please, not a peep.
249
00:09:04,950 --> 00:09:06,450
And when you leave, take Brian with you,
250
00:09:06,510 --> 00:09:07,510
so nobody gets suspicious.
251
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:10,680
- 10-4.
- Not a word to anyone... no one.
252
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,190
Oh, you ain't got to worry, brother.
253
00:09:12,250 --> 00:09:15,890
I am CIA on this bitch.
254
00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:18,060
What's up?
255
00:09:18,130 --> 00:09:20,230
So we can't get married
for at least 24 hours?
256
00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:21,500
No. Maybe it's a sign.
257
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:22,660
- That we shouldn't do it?
- No!
258
00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:23,800
That we should go to Vegas and do it.
259
00:09:23,870 --> 00:09:24,870
- Sorry we're late, bro.
- Hey.
260
00:09:24,930 --> 00:09:26,400
Look, they figured out something was up
261
00:09:26,470 --> 00:09:27,470
while I was talking to you.
262
00:09:27,540 --> 00:09:28,770
I thought you had your poker face on.
263
00:09:28,840 --> 00:09:30,170
If that was his poker face,
264
00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:31,710
we got to start playing some goddamn cards
265
00:09:31,770 --> 00:09:32,770
around the depot, man.
266
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,540
- Did we miss everything?
- No...
267
00:09:34,610 --> 00:09:36,180
Jesus, Maeve, you called Billy?
268
00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:38,180
I couldn't go to a wedding without a date.
269
00:09:38,250 --> 00:09:40,710
Wait. This is a date? Hell, yeah.
270
00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:42,080
Hey, I'm all better now, Theresa.
271
00:09:42,150 --> 00:09:44,020
We got seven witnesses
and no way to get married.
272
00:09:44,090 --> 00:09:45,720
Yeah, the law says we
have to wait 24 hours.
273
00:09:45,790 --> 00:09:47,860
Wait, I got a way. My Uncle
runs a church across town.
274
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:48,890
It's pentecostal.
275
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:50,220
- You think he'd do it?
- Really?
276
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:51,730
He'll do almost anything
if you got the cash.
277
00:09:51,790 --> 00:09:53,990
- I'll call him real quick.
- What's this witness bullshit?
278
00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:56,130
- We need two witnesses.
- I know that, asshole.
279
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:57,360
You got a shitload of witnesses.
280
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,970
I need a title, bro, like Best Man.
281
00:09:59,030 --> 00:10:00,130
No, we're not doing all of that.
282
00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:01,540
- No.
- Hey, when you said
283
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:02,940
two years ago you was
thinking about getting married,
284
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,810
that hands down, I was the
only choice for Best Man.
285
00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:05,940
- You still are.
- You were thinking
286
00:10:06,010 --> 00:10:07,210
about marriage two years ago,
287
00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:08,680
and you didn't think to say anything to me?
288
00:10:08,740 --> 00:10:10,310
If he gets to be best
man, I'm Maid of Honor.
289
00:10:10,380 --> 00:10:11,810
No, we're not doing that shit, Maeve.
290
00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:12,880
That was just idle chat.
291
00:10:12,950 --> 00:10:14,650
We were just bullshitting
in the rig one day, you know?
292
00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:17,080
- Can I be a groomsman?
- Idle chat about marrying me?
293
00:10:17,150 --> 00:10:18,390
Babe, not right now.
294
00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:19,990
- Can we be bridesmaids?
- I love that movie.
295
00:10:20,060 --> 00:10:21,160
Hey, you said "bullshitting."
296
00:10:21,220 --> 00:10:22,490
So were you bullshitting about marrying me?
297
00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:23,860
Hey, how about ushers?
298
00:10:23,930 --> 00:10:25,590
You got groomsmen.
How about a couple ushers?
299
00:10:25,660 --> 00:10:26,930
Does this look like I'm bullshitting you?
300
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:28,030
I don't know. You tell me.
301
00:10:28,100 --> 00:10:29,600
But there won't be anyone to ush.
302
00:10:29,660 --> 00:10:31,330
It's not about who I
ush or who I don't ush.
303
00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:32,730
It's about the position.
304
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:34,640
Two seconds ago, you wanted
to throw in the towel.
305
00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:35,740
Bullshit, when?
306
00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:36,770
I am the Best Man.
307
00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:38,070
Brian, you're the groomsman.
308
00:10:38,140 --> 00:10:39,440
Yes!
309
00:10:39,510 --> 00:10:40,710
I thought waiting 24
hours was a positive sign.
310
00:10:40,780 --> 00:10:42,110
You thought it was a negative sign.
311
00:10:42,180 --> 00:10:43,710
- No.
- What's Billy gonna be?
312
00:10:43,780 --> 00:10:44,780
Billy should be an usher.
313
00:10:44,850 --> 00:10:45,910
Step off, bitch.
314
00:10:45,980 --> 00:10:47,280
I am the Best Man.
315
00:10:47,350 --> 00:10:49,080
I'm the boss of all the
men in the wedding party,
316
00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:50,450
not the groomsman.
317
00:10:50,520 --> 00:10:52,590
- Billy is an usher.
- We should get dresses.
318
00:10:52,650 --> 00:10:54,720
- All: No!
- We're not getting dresses, Maeve!
319
00:10:54,790 --> 00:10:56,660
- Then I'm the head usher.
- There are only two of you!
320
00:10:56,730 --> 00:10:57,830
I'm not having equal billing
321
00:10:57,890 --> 00:10:59,760
with some dim-witted
Special Ed reject.
322
00:10:59,830 --> 00:11:00,830
Now, either I'm the head usher,
323
00:11:00,900 --> 00:11:02,530
or I ain't no goddamn usher at all.
324
00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:03,900
[Speaking spanish]
325
00:11:03,970 --> 00:11:05,330
Yo, he said he's gonna do it, y'all.
326
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:06,600
- [All cheering]
- Really?
327
00:11:06,670 --> 00:11:07,600
So he's got an opening in an hour,
328
00:11:07,670 --> 00:11:08,870
but we got to be on time,
329
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:10,370
because he has an
exorcism right after that.
330
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:11,610
And it's gonna be 200 bucks cash.
331
00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:13,710
- 200 bucks?
- What kind of church is this?
332
00:11:13,780 --> 00:11:16,210
It's called Iglesia Pentecostal
Espiritu Santo de Kostner.
333
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,210
Costner... as in Kevin Costner?
334
00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:19,780
Holy shit, I never thought about that.
335
00:11:19,850 --> 00:11:21,420
Nah, that's just the street that it's on.
336
00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:22,720
Okay.
337
00:11:22,780 --> 00:11:23,880
But my Uncle really did like Tin Cup.
338
00:11:23,950 --> 00:11:26,790
Cheech Marin, yo... that man is ridiculous.
339
00:11:30,790 --> 00:11:32,460
Billy, don't start crying again.
340
00:11:32,530 --> 00:11:34,800
Okay Kostner Street,
everybody, lock and load.
341
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,000
T and I are gonna stop at the cash machine.
342
00:11:36,060 --> 00:11:38,330
This... honey, this is
a positive sign, right?
343
00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,770
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, let's go.
344
00:11:39,830 --> 00:11:41,340
- Okay.
- Let's go.
345
00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:42,800
- Come on, what do you think?
- Now it's gonna be a wedding.
346
00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:43,900
We gonna have a good time.
What kind of church is this?
347
00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:44,910
This is gonna be a good wedding!
348
00:11:44,970 --> 00:11:46,840
What kind of church is this?
349
00:11:46,910 --> 00:11:48,240
They got some kind of exorcism.
350
00:11:48,310 --> 00:11:49,710
Don't nobody know. Look,
we gonna do this right.
351
00:11:49,780 --> 00:11:51,080
They could have chickens for ushers, man.
352
00:11:51,150 --> 00:11:52,780
- Chickens?
- I don't know about no chicken.
353
00:11:57,450 --> 00:11:59,450
What?
354
00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:02,580
Hey, did Maeve blab this to you guys?
355
00:12:02,650 --> 00:12:03,820
Yes, baby. Oh, my God.
356
00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:05,680
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
357
00:12:05,750 --> 00:12:08,450
Yes, yes, congratulations my ass, okay?
358
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:10,520
If you think that my
daughter is marrying this kid
359
00:12:10,590 --> 00:12:12,630
in this fleabag fake friggin' church,
360
00:12:12,680 --> 00:12:13,610
you're all out of your goddamn minds.
361
00:12:13,680 --> 00:12:14,720
Language, Jerry.
362
00:12:14,780 --> 00:12:15,720
I didn't say sh... hole, Bridget.
363
00:12:15,780 --> 00:12:16,950
- Dad!
- Excuse me, sir.
364
00:12:17,020 --> 00:12:18,590
My church is fully licensed.
365
00:12:18,650 --> 00:12:19,750
Yeah, by who...
366
00:12:19,820 --> 00:12:21,490
The Puerto Rican cockfighting association?
367
00:12:21,560 --> 00:12:24,290
- The joint's a dump, padre.
- Hey, stay out of this, Mike.
368
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:25,560
You stayed out of our lives for 15 years.
369
00:12:25,630 --> 00:12:27,260
- We managed just fine.
- Ma!
370
00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,700
Hey, me and Johnny made
up. You know, I apologized.
371
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:31,370
Now we talk, and we hang out. We do stuff.
372
00:12:31,430 --> 00:12:33,570
We're like, um, uh... Father and son?
373
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:36,340
Very funny, I was thinking
more like Starsky and Hutch.
374
00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:37,810
Listen, kid, we got to think this over.
375
00:12:37,870 --> 00:12:39,410
Let me take a picture.
376
00:12:39,470 --> 00:12:40,710
I've got one of those new smartphones.
377
00:12:40,780 --> 00:12:42,040
It's not up to you, Hutch.
378
00:12:42,110 --> 00:12:43,710
It sure as hell ain't up to you, pal.
379
00:12:43,780 --> 00:12:44,780
Get closer together.
380
00:12:44,850 --> 00:12:46,080
What the hell do you mean by that?
381
00:12:46,150 --> 00:12:47,310
Closer, scrunch in.
382
00:12:47,380 --> 00:12:48,750
It means that my daughter's a ten, bigface.
383
00:12:48,820 --> 00:12:50,520
- Bigface?
- Your face is huge.
384
00:12:50,590 --> 00:12:52,820
This is news to you, secretariat?
385
00:12:52,890 --> 00:12:54,150
- Let me get in, father.
- Sure.
386
00:12:54,220 --> 00:12:56,160
Scrunch in, scrunch in. Say "cheeseburger."
387
00:12:56,220 --> 00:12:57,460
You add to that the fact
that she's a hero cop...
388
00:12:57,530 --> 00:12:59,630
- Cheeseburger.
- That's a 13.
389
00:12:59,690 --> 00:13:00,990
And she's marrying what?
390
00:13:01,060 --> 00:13:04,000
This guy who's what? Maybe...
Not for nothing... a four?
391
00:13:04,070 --> 00:13:05,770
You asshole. My son ain't no four.
392
00:13:05,830 --> 00:13:06,770
- Yeah, you tell him.
- That's right.
393
00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:08,370
- He's at least a five.
- What?
394
00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,340
Well, add three points
'cause he's an E.M.T.,
395
00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:11,810
and that makes him an eight.
396
00:13:11,870 --> 00:13:13,770
Your daughter's a ten, minus
two points for being a cop.
397
00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:15,010
- What?
- That makes her an eight too.
398
00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:17,080
- So it all evens out here.
- I'm confused.
399
00:13:17,150 --> 00:13:19,110
Why is she losing two points?
400
00:13:19,180 --> 00:13:20,410
'Cause you know what
every firefighter and cop
401
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:22,450
have in common?
402
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:23,950
They both want to be firefighters.
403
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:25,390
- [Laughter]
- Okay, that's...
404
00:13:25,450 --> 00:13:27,450
- That's funny.
- Let's... let's not...
405
00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:28,590
- One more.
- Mom, come on.
406
00:13:28,660 --> 00:13:29,960
Come on, everybody, come on.
407
00:13:30,020 --> 00:13:31,690
Quick, quick, quick, quick,
let's just get it done.
408
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:33,630
- Scrunch in.
- One more, everyone in.
409
00:13:33,690 --> 00:13:35,260
How do you know when a
firefighter has passed away?
410
00:13:35,330 --> 00:13:37,560
He drops the remote control.
411
00:13:37,630 --> 00:13:39,970
- Oh, that's enough!
- Hey, hey, hey!
412
00:13:40,030 --> 00:13:42,700
- Please stop!
- Hey, guys, listen up, hey!
413
00:13:42,770 --> 00:13:43,770
- The wedding...
- Hey, listen!
414
00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:45,070
This is our day... right.
415
00:13:45,140 --> 00:13:46,270
- Not yours.
- Right.
416
00:13:46,340 --> 00:13:47,740
And I am marrying the love of my life,
417
00:13:47,810 --> 00:13:49,740
who is not a 4 or a 5.
418
00:13:49,810 --> 00:13:51,180
He is a frickin' 15.
419
00:13:51,250 --> 00:13:52,410
- Oh!
- That's what I'm talking about.
420
00:13:52,780 --> 00:13:54,180
Well, you were never
too good at math, honey.
421
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:56,450
My chin is so weird in this.
422
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,520
We need one more. Father, just one more.
423
00:13:58,590 --> 00:14:00,720
- One more, thank you.
- Hey, where's Cash and them at?
424
00:14:00,790 --> 00:14:02,120
They're seating all the guests.
425
00:14:02,190 --> 00:14:03,460
Both: Guests?
426
00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:04,830
Yeah, there's, like, 35
Puerto Ricans in there.
427
00:14:04,890 --> 00:14:06,460
- What?
- What?
428
00:14:06,530 --> 00:14:07,790
Here at the Iglesia Del
Espiritu Santo de Kostner...
429
00:14:07,860 --> 00:14:09,530
- Come on, let's go.
- Fine!
430
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:10,860
One more!
431
00:14:10,930 --> 00:14:12,700
My neck looked funny.
We have to get in there.
432
00:14:12,770 --> 00:14:13,900
We like to fill the pews.
433
00:14:13,970 --> 00:14:16,940
It makes the occasion much more joyous.
434
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,070
[Camera shutter clicks]
435
00:14:18,140 --> 00:14:20,340
Speaking of which, you have the $400?
436
00:14:20,410 --> 00:14:22,040
Both: What?
- I thought it was $200.
437
00:14:22,110 --> 00:14:23,980
200 for the service, 200 for the joy.
438
00:14:24,050 --> 00:14:25,910
Can we get an itemized receipt for this?
439
00:14:25,980 --> 00:14:27,850
I only... I only have $200.
440
00:14:27,920 --> 00:14:29,250
- Does anybody have any money?
- Um...
441
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:31,620
Don't look at me. I ain't
the father of the bride.
442
00:14:31,690 --> 00:14:32,620
What? What are you looking at me for?
443
00:14:32,690 --> 00:14:34,120
Get in there!
444
00:14:34,190 --> 00:14:35,360
Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Kelly.
445
00:14:35,420 --> 00:14:36,820
He's a cop. He ain't used to this.
446
00:14:36,890 --> 00:14:39,690
Usually when cash changes
hands, he's on the receiving end.
447
00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:41,500
- Hey, I earned that, pal!
- [Overlapping shouting]
448
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:42,760
You want to start with me?
449
00:14:42,830 --> 00:14:44,400
- No, dad!
- You'll be locked up, pal!
450
00:14:44,470 --> 00:14:46,670
Yo, are you sure you want to do this?
451
00:14:46,730 --> 00:14:47,700
Absolutely.
452
00:14:47,770 --> 00:14:48,770
Look, I just need you to know...
453
00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:50,140
I got the rig gassed up and ready to go.
454
00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,400
We can Thelma & Louise
this shit right now.
455
00:14:51,470 --> 00:14:52,770
Not necessary, bro.
456
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:54,170
I'm good. Okay.
457
00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:55,940
You realize they die at the
end of that movie, right?
458
00:14:56,010 --> 00:14:58,350
Who gives a shit? Brad Pitt lived.
459
00:14:58,410 --> 00:14:59,380
What the hell is this?
460
00:14:59,450 --> 00:15:00,880
This is your Best Man saving...
461
00:15:00,950 --> 00:15:02,350
- Oh!
- Your sorry white ass.
462
00:15:02,420 --> 00:15:04,350
- Is this real?
- $8,000 real.
463
00:15:04,420 --> 00:15:06,620
Aah! Holy shit!
464
00:15:06,690 --> 00:15:09,020
- Jesus, Hank...
- I advise against it.
465
00:15:09,090 --> 00:15:10,660
Look, three months' salary
is a normal amount of money
466
00:15:10,730 --> 00:15:11,660
to spend on a wedding ring, numbnuts,
467
00:15:11,730 --> 00:15:13,030
for someone you truly love.
468
00:15:13,090 --> 00:15:15,200
Theresa's not really an
$8,000-ring kind of girl.
469
00:15:15,260 --> 00:15:16,530
That's why I love her.
470
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:19,170
- Does she have tits?
- She's got fabulous tits.
471
00:15:19,230 --> 00:15:20,730
Then watch and learn, asshole.
472
00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:21,800
Holy shit!
473
00:15:21,870 --> 00:15:23,200
[Gasps] Is that real?
474
00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:25,440
- Yes, it is.
- Oh, my God!
475
00:15:25,510 --> 00:15:27,040
- I love you!
- Oh, God.
476
00:15:27,110 --> 00:15:29,410
- Mom, look at this ring!
- Oh, my... Oh, my God!
477
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:32,410
Aw. It's amazing.
478
00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:35,250
I know more about pussy than
you two dipshits put together,
479
00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,380
and I ain't even seen one
since the day I was born.
480
00:15:37,450 --> 00:15:40,490
Who's in the limo?
481
00:15:44,460 --> 00:15:45,690
Oh, shit wait. Who is that?
482
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:48,130
Is that the driver?
483
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:49,800
Oh, my God, Maeve!
484
00:15:49,860 --> 00:15:52,370
- You look gorgeous.
- Thanks. Hi.
485
00:15:52,430 --> 00:15:53,970
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
486
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,240
Let me get a picture.
487
00:15:55,300 --> 00:15:56,840
- Say "cheeseburger."
- Cheeseburger.
488
00:15:56,900 --> 00:15:59,040
Cheeseburger.
489
00:15:59,110 --> 00:16:01,270
- Who's the driver?
- My son Ramon.
490
00:16:01,340 --> 00:16:03,780
We run a wedding store,
as well as the church.
491
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:05,550
You got 'em coming and going, huh?
492
00:16:05,610 --> 00:16:08,620
I got my eye on you, Father Damien.
493
00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:11,050
- Ramon got us a great deal.
- It's the least I can do.
494
00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:12,320
Besides, when I saw this tux,
495
00:16:12,390 --> 00:16:14,420
I thought, "Billy! Billy, Billy!"
496
00:16:14,490 --> 00:16:17,420
[Laughter]
497
00:16:19,060 --> 00:16:20,760
We're catholic, and I'm so glad
498
00:16:20,830 --> 00:16:22,660
to see a church that accepts the gays.
499
00:16:22,730 --> 00:16:26,100
Ramon is not gay. He's creative.
500
00:16:26,170 --> 00:16:28,440
You called Mom and Dad?
501
00:16:28,500 --> 00:16:31,640
I wanted 'em to see me in this dress.
502
00:16:31,710 --> 00:16:32,870
I said no dresses, Maeve.
503
00:16:32,940 --> 00:16:36,580
Oh, my God, Theresa, you're jealous.
504
00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:38,950
- Ha!
- That is so small...
505
00:16:39,010 --> 00:16:42,280
Just like my ass in this hot little dress.
506
00:16:42,350 --> 00:16:45,520
[Chuckles] Who's going to fat camp now?
507
00:16:47,290 --> 00:16:50,220
Hey, I'm sorry, T.
508
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:57,480
He is gathered here among you
509
00:16:57,500 --> 00:17:00,910
At the calling of your hearts
510
00:17:00,970 --> 00:17:03,780
rest assured this troubadour
511
00:17:03,930 --> 00:17:06,430
is acting on His part
512
00:17:06,810 --> 00:17:09,780
the union of your spirits here
513
00:17:09,850 --> 00:17:12,910
has caused Him to remain
514
00:17:12,980 --> 00:17:16,150
for whenever two or more of you
515
00:17:16,220 --> 00:17:18,520
are gathered in His name
516
00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:21,960
there is love
517
00:17:22,020 --> 00:17:23,290
[Trembling]
518
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:25,460
El hombre deja su madre
519
00:17:25,530 --> 00:17:29,460
y la mujer deja su casa
520
00:17:29,530 --> 00:17:34,970
Los dos juntos van a
ir hacerse una persona
521
00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:36,870
That means you guys are gonna be one.
522
00:17:36,940 --> 00:17:38,040
[Crying]
523
00:17:38,110 --> 00:17:40,980
[Rooster crows]
524
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,680
[Sniffling]
525
00:17:43,750 --> 00:17:45,780
You look beautiful.
526
00:17:45,850 --> 00:17:49,620
Johnny, man, I just love you, man.
527
00:17:49,690 --> 00:17:52,150
- I love you too, Billy.
- Thanks, Billy.
528
00:17:52,220 --> 00:17:55,220
In the interest of time, I
will keep my remarks brief.
529
00:17:55,290 --> 00:17:57,430
We gather today to witness the joining
530
00:17:57,490 --> 00:17:59,490
of two loving people
531
00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:03,330
as they embark on the journey of marriage.
532
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:08,070
It has been said by one greater than me,
533
00:18:08,140 --> 00:18:10,300
"When a defining moment comes along,
534
00:18:10,370 --> 00:18:12,570
you must define the moment,
535
00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:16,210
or the moment will define you."
536
00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:18,680
Isn't that from the movie Bull Durham?
537
00:18:18,750 --> 00:18:21,320
No, Tin Cup, when Costner's
talking to Cheech Marin.
538
00:18:21,380 --> 00:18:23,280
- No, that's Bull Durham.
- Tin Cup.
539
00:18:23,350 --> 00:18:24,350
Shh!
540
00:18:24,420 --> 00:18:27,250
"I believe in the heart.
541
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,060
I believe in the soul.
542
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:34,130
I believe in long, slow,
deep, soft, wet kisses
543
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,060
that last forever and ever."
544
00:18:37,130 --> 00:18:39,200
That's Bull Durham, horseface.
545
00:18:39,270 --> 00:18:41,740
[Grunting like a horse]
546
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:42,870
Quiet.
547
00:18:42,940 --> 00:18:44,340
- Do you, Jimmy Farrell...
- Johnny.
548
00:18:44,410 --> 00:18:47,040
Take this woman, Theresa, to
be your lawfully wedded wife,
549
00:18:47,110 --> 00:18:49,640
to have and to hold and so on and so forth?
550
00:18:49,710 --> 00:18:52,180
- I do.
- And do you, Theresa Kelly,
551
00:18:52,250 --> 00:18:56,050
take this man, Tommy, to be
your lawfully wedded husband,
552
00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:58,350
blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah?
553
00:18:58,420 --> 00:19:01,520
Yes, Johnny, I do.
554
00:19:01,590 --> 00:19:05,290
If there is anyone amongst
you who knows of any reason
555
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,660
why Theresa and Donny
556
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:09,900
- should not be joined together...
- [rooster crows]
557
00:19:09,970 --> 00:19:12,930
Speak now or forever hold your peace.
558
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,370
Oh, I do.
559
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:17,510
There's an entire barn's
worth of fighting birds
560
00:19:17,570 --> 00:19:19,710
locked up down in the basement
561
00:19:19,780 --> 00:19:22,140
and a fully equipped cockfighting ring,
562
00:19:22,210 --> 00:19:24,080
and you, Father Julio, are under arrest.
563
00:19:24,150 --> 00:19:27,850
- Ay, Dios!
- What?
564
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:29,820
Ramon!
565
00:19:29,890 --> 00:19:32,490
Maricon!
566
00:19:32,550 --> 00:19:35,520
[Gasping in pain] Oh, no, no!
567
00:19:35,590 --> 00:19:38,760
- [Concerned chatter]
- Brian, get the A.E.D.
568
00:19:38,830 --> 00:19:40,830
- [Woman gasps]
- There's no time for that!
569
00:19:40,900 --> 00:19:42,830
Everyone out of the goddamn way!
570
00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:44,100
[Rooster crows]
571
00:19:44,170 --> 00:19:47,570
[Sirens wailing]
572
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:51,240
Vital signs stabilizing fast.
573
00:19:51,310 --> 00:19:52,710
He's conscious.
574
00:19:52,770 --> 00:19:54,680
I'm glad you're still with us, Padre,
575
00:19:54,740 --> 00:19:55,910
'cause you're under arrest
576
00:19:55,980 --> 00:19:58,450
for running an illegal gambling operation.
577
00:19:58,510 --> 00:19:59,950
You have the right to remain silent,
578
00:20:00,020 --> 00:20:01,180
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
579
00:20:01,250 --> 00:20:02,820
There's something wrong with this phone.
580
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:05,220
I don't have bags under my eyes.
581
00:20:05,290 --> 00:20:07,820
So what exactly do we
call ourselves now, hmm?
582
00:20:07,890 --> 00:20:08,920
Engaged?
583
00:20:08,990 --> 00:20:11,990
Still on a break from each other? What?
584
00:20:12,060 --> 00:20:13,390
How about roommates?
585
00:20:13,460 --> 00:20:15,260
- You're gonna move in with me?
- Mm-hmm.
586
00:20:15,330 --> 00:20:17,600
You can commit to that?
587
00:20:17,670 --> 00:20:20,400
Yeah, 'cause I love you.
588
00:20:20,470 --> 00:20:21,770
And based on the price of that ring,
589
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:23,570
I can't really afford to
live by myself anymore, so...
590
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,770
- Look, so shiny.
- [Laughs]
591
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:28,980
I'd say visit me in prison...
592
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:33,150
But I'll probably be
juggling a few guys by then.
593
00:20:33,220 --> 00:20:35,280
[Siren wailing]
594
00:20:35,350 --> 00:20:37,850
I don't see what the
hoopla is about a ring.
595
00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,550
Anybody can go to a mall
and walk out with a ring.
596
00:20:40,620 --> 00:20:42,590
But it takes a special kind of man
597
00:20:42,660 --> 00:20:45,460
to find the severed digit
of a real, live person,
598
00:20:45,530 --> 00:20:47,290
carefully package it up,
carry it across the city,
599
00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:50,100
and present it as a gift to
another real, live person,
600
00:20:50,170 --> 00:20:52,570
like you did for me.
601
00:20:52,630 --> 00:20:54,640
That was very, very deep.
602
00:20:54,700 --> 00:20:58,640
It creates a unique and lasting bond.
603
00:21:02,410 --> 00:21:05,980
You know I can't procure you
any more body parts, right?
604
00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:09,080
North Cicero's gonna be jammed,
605
00:21:09,150 --> 00:21:11,020
so maybe cut down West Kinzie
to South Central.
606
00:21:11,090 --> 00:21:13,720
Babe, I drive for a living. I
think I know where I'm going.
607
00:21:13,790 --> 00:21:15,420
And I don't?
608
00:21:15,490 --> 00:21:17,060
Cut down Kinzie. I'm
not cutting down Kinzie.
609
00:21:17,130 --> 00:21:18,760
Oh, I am going to throw this
goddamn ring out the window.
610
00:21:18,830 --> 00:21:20,830
- Okay, all right, all right.
- Cut down Kinzie!
611
00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:22,530
I'll cut down Kinzie.
612
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:23,960
There. Happy now?
613
00:21:24,030 --> 00:21:26,730
- Yep.
- Oh, shit.
614
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,400
- It's wide open.
- Sucker.
615
00:21:28,470 --> 00:21:30,600
- You were right.
- Take a left on Laramie.
616
00:21:30,670 --> 00:21:32,210
- I will. I was gonna.
- No, you weren't.
617
00:21:32,270 --> 00:21:33,670
I always take a left on Laramie.
618
00:21:33,740 --> 00:21:35,210
- You never take Laramie.
- Laramie is my street.
619
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:36,710
- I showed you Laramie!
- Oh, really?
620
00:21:36,780 --> 00:21:39,280
I've known Laramie for
years. You know that.
621
00:21:39,350 --> 00:21:41,280
We're gonna have to move all your stuff.
622
00:21:41,350 --> 00:21:43,180
When do you want to move?
623
00:21:43,250 --> 00:21:44,750
I don't know if I want to anymore.
624
00:21:44,820 --> 00:21:46,320
- I'm just kidding.
- You're an idiot.
625
00:21:46,370 --> 00:21:50,920
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