Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,438 --> 00:00:07,473
Mom, what are you
still doing here?
2
00:00:07,540 --> 00:00:10,342
Jackie's helping me
finish my new puzzle.
3
00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:11,877
Look, Roseanne, marbles.
4
00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:13,445
All marbles.
And get this:
5
00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:17,016
Each marble is just
slightly different.
6
00:00:18,818 --> 00:00:21,286
Well, why don't you guys
take all your marbles there
7
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:22,554
And move them
off the table,
8
00:00:22,622 --> 00:00:23,822
'cause we're going
to eat dinner.
9
00:00:23,890 --> 00:00:26,291
Oh, don't be
a party pooper, Roseanne.
10
00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,127
We can just eat
around the puzzle.
11
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:30,562
It'll make dinner more fun.
12
00:00:34,834 --> 00:00:37,102
Don't make me do this.
13
00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:38,170
[garbage disposal]
14
00:00:38,238 --> 00:00:39,171
Roseanne, you wouldn't!
15
00:00:39,239 --> 00:00:40,472
It's getting heavy.
16
00:00:42,142 --> 00:00:44,810
So you had a bad day.
17
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,980
That is no excuse
to take it out on me.
18
00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:51,650
When life gives me lemons,
I make lemonade.
19
00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:55,554
But when life
gives you lemons...
20
00:00:55,622 --> 00:01:00,025
Sourpuss, sourpuss, sourpuss!
21
00:01:00,093 --> 00:01:01,827
What's her problem lately?
22
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:03,128
You think you've
got it bad?
23
00:01:03,196 --> 00:01:04,863
Try living with the woman.
24
00:01:04,931 --> 00:01:06,732
I came over here
to get away from her.
25
00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:07,733
She followed me.
26
00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:13,972
I swear to god, she's sucking
the very life right out of me.
27
00:01:15,041 --> 00:01:16,208
Just a matter of time.
28
00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:18,143
Everybody in
the retirement village got to know her.
29
00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:19,912
Now they're sending
her back to us.
30
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:23,849
Well, can't she make
any friends over there?
31
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,518
I mean, don't they have,
like, one deaf person
32
00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:28,721
Strapped down
to something there?
33
00:01:30,423 --> 00:01:32,024
We have got
to do something soon.
34
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:35,627
She is undoing a lot
of expensive therapy.
35
00:01:37,864 --> 00:01:40,399
Dinner!
Let's go.
36
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:43,235
About time.
I'm wasting away here.
37
00:01:43,303 --> 00:01:45,337
Okay, well, c'mon,
let's go eat.
38
00:01:45,405 --> 00:01:47,373
We'll see you later, mom.
See you tomorrow.
39
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,174
Oh, no, no,
i'm not going.
40
00:01:49,242 --> 00:01:50,442
I'll be fine out here.
41
00:01:50,510 --> 00:01:52,911
Just have some tea
and work on my puzzle.
42
00:01:59,552 --> 00:02:00,886
While you're driving home?
43
00:02:01,921 --> 00:02:03,188
Nonsense.
44
00:02:03,256 --> 00:02:06,125
If it gets dark before
I finish the puzzle,
45
00:02:06,192 --> 00:02:07,793
I'll just sleep over.
46
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:09,461
Let's go here.
We're looking for corners.
47
00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:11,230
[snaps]
48
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:57,009
[laughing]
49
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:03,515
Wow.
50
00:03:03,583 --> 00:03:04,950
Wow.
51
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,719
Come here.
Come here, look.
52
00:03:06,786 --> 00:03:07,720
What?
53
00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:09,488
This is so creepy.
54
00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:12,057
Doesn't that look like elvis?
55
00:03:14,661 --> 00:03:16,495
How about a
cup of coffee, jake?
56
00:03:16,563 --> 00:03:17,796
It's on the house.
57
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:19,498
I'll take a cream soda.
58
00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:22,334
One cup of coffee
and i'm up all afternoon.
59
00:03:24,004 --> 00:03:26,105
Hello, girls.
60
00:03:26,172 --> 00:03:27,906
Hi.
61
00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:31,176
So, is he going
to be our new dad
62
00:03:31,244 --> 00:03:35,080
Or is he just another
one of your nooners?
63
00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:37,416
Don't.
64
00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:40,652
Don't start with me, Roseanne.
65
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:43,389
That's jake from
the retirement complex.
66
00:03:43,456 --> 00:03:45,591
My battery was dead,
so he drove me in.
67
00:03:45,658 --> 00:03:46,925
That's all.
68
00:03:46,993 --> 00:03:48,594
Well, she is 63.
69
00:03:48,661 --> 00:03:50,529
I guess it's perfectly
natural that she starts
70
00:03:50,597 --> 00:03:53,132
Getting interested in boys.
71
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,166
Roseanne,
72
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,201
You don't think
the two of them are...
73
00:03:56,269 --> 00:03:58,370
Oh, gross.
74
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:02,307
No grosser than her
doing it with dad.
75
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:04,877
[in unison]
ewww!
76
00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:07,279
Maybe they're not.
77
00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:09,448
Maybe they should.
78
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:13,419
Jackie, I think she needs
a new little puzzle pal.
79
00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:18,924
I'll give the bride away
if you kick her down the aisle.
80
00:04:22,028 --> 00:04:23,962
So, ma...
81
00:04:24,030 --> 00:04:25,197
Is it getting serious?
82
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,800
Has he introduced you
to his parents yet?
83
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:31,503
Please, girls, i'm
not in the market.
84
00:04:31,571 --> 00:04:34,340
I spent 40 years
taking care of your father
85
00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:36,241
And i'm not going
to do that again.
86
00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:37,476
Well, relax.
87
00:04:37,544 --> 00:04:39,411
In 40 years, all
that guy's going to need
88
00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:42,214
Is just an occasional mowing.
89
00:04:44,317 --> 00:04:46,785
C'mon, mom.
90
00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:47,986
He's kind of cute.
91
00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:50,756
He's like a big leprechaun.
92
00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:54,193
He's got a cute butt.
93
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,028
Oh, please.
94
00:04:56,096 --> 00:04:58,630
She's right, mom.
Fine set of cakes.
95
00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:04,036
Well, he is a speed walker.
96
00:05:05,505 --> 00:05:06,905
Hi, Jake.
97
00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:09,708
I'm Roseanne and this
is my sister Jackie.
98
00:05:09,776 --> 00:05:11,410
We're Bev's daughters.
99
00:05:12,579 --> 00:05:15,414
Well, I see where
she gets her looks.
100
00:05:19,419 --> 00:05:23,255
Gee, Jake, could you
get that fork for me?
101
00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:41,940
Get a nice look
at the caboose?
102
00:05:43,309 --> 00:05:45,110
I beg your pardon?
103
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,680
I love to shock your mom.
104
00:05:47,747 --> 00:05:51,050
I had quite enough shocking
on the drive over.
105
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:55,387
Oh, Beverly, don't stop me
if you've heard this one before.
106
00:05:55,455 --> 00:05:58,390
Did you read about
the lady who was so in love with a priest
107
00:05:58,458 --> 00:06:02,194
She followed him around
a church and grabbed him by the organ?
108
00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:09,535
You put your teeth
in that mouth?
109
00:06:09,602 --> 00:06:11,737
Hey, ma, I forgot to tell ya.
110
00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:16,075
Dan wanted you to come
bowling with us tonight.
111
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:17,676
I'd love to.
112
00:06:17,744 --> 00:06:19,978
I'm sure i've still got
one of your father's balls
113
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:21,880
Around somewhere.
114
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:27,019
Alimony wasn't enough?
115
00:06:32,258 --> 00:06:35,160
Hey, ma, how about we bring
Jake bowling with us?
116
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:36,662
I'd love to go bowling.
117
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,365
And, Bev, if you want me to,
i'll give you a ride.
118
00:06:39,432 --> 00:06:40,833
I've got reclining seats.
119
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:43,202
I know what
you mean by that.
120
00:06:43,269 --> 00:06:45,871
Aw, come on.
You love it.
121
00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:48,273
I could tell you the story
about the milkmaids again.
122
00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:49,441
I'm not listening.
123
00:06:49,509 --> 00:06:50,876
This midget walks
into a farm,
124
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,312
I didn't hear a word--
[jake] who strips completely--
125
00:06:53,380 --> 00:06:57,716
God, it's like they're
feeding off each other.
126
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:04,990
[knocking at door]
127
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,395
Hi.
Oh, hey.
128
00:07:09,462 --> 00:07:11,764
Is Darlene around?
I need to get an assignment from her.
129
00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:13,699
No, she's at the library.
130
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,134
What is D.J. doing up?
131
00:07:15,201 --> 00:07:16,769
When I baby-sit,
he's not allowed
132
00:07:16,836 --> 00:07:18,103
To watch American Gladiators.
133
00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:20,706
It makes him want to wrestle.
134
00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:23,609
Geez, one time.
135
00:07:25,211 --> 00:07:28,013
I'll just hang out
until Darlene gets back.
136
00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:30,916
It might be a while.
137
00:07:30,984 --> 00:07:32,651
Oh, you're working
on your comic book?
138
00:07:32,719 --> 00:07:34,620
Yeah, kinda.
139
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:38,123
God, the women you draw
are so beautiful.
140
00:07:38,191 --> 00:07:39,892
I wish I had a body like that.
141
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:41,260
Yours is fine.
142
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:44,596
I mean, you know.
You're all...
143
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:45,898
You're in proportion.
144
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:49,134
Really?
You're just saying that.
145
00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:50,269
No, no.
I mean it.
146
00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:55,140
Everything ends
where it ends.
147
00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,875
Thanks.
148
00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:03,148
What are you doing?
149
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:04,616
I thought you wanted me to.
150
00:08:04,684 --> 00:08:06,352
I mean, the way
you looked at me.
151
00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:08,987
I didn't look
at you any way.
152
00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,056
I looked at you like this.
153
00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:14,393
There was no way
in how I looked at you.
154
00:08:14,461 --> 00:08:16,962
David, everybody is out.
155
00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:19,431
We can go to
your room if you want.
156
00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:22,334
Molly, what are
you talking about?
157
00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:24,136
You know i'm going
out with Darlene.
158
00:08:24,204 --> 00:08:26,972
David, you're cute
and you're smart.
159
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:29,274
And you deserve someone
who doesn't sleep
160
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,543
Hanging upside-down.
161
00:08:33,980 --> 00:08:36,415
Hey, you don't know anything
about Darlene and me.
162
00:08:36,483 --> 00:08:38,183
I know she treats
you like crap.
163
00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:39,351
C'mon, that's not fair.
164
00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:42,254
Darlene treats
everyone like crap.
165
00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:43,422
Come on, David.
166
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:44,823
She doesn't act like
you're her boyfriend.
167
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:46,959
It's hard to tell you guys
are even a couple.
168
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,294
That's not true.
We have big plans.
169
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,397
We're going to this art school
in new york together.
170
00:08:51,464 --> 00:08:53,032
Like you'll still
be together in two years.
171
00:08:53,099 --> 00:08:54,033
No, we're doing it now.
172
00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:55,234
We're dropping out
of high school
173
00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:56,702
As soon as we're accepted.
174
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:57,703
You're kidding.
175
00:08:57,771 --> 00:08:59,405
You guys are really
going to drop out--
176
00:08:59,472 --> 00:09:01,006
[Roseanne]
hi, David. Hi, Molly.
177
00:09:01,074 --> 00:09:02,975
D.J., what are you doing up?
178
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:05,010
Nothing.
179
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:06,745
I think I gotta
go to bed now.
180
00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:08,213
I better get going.
181
00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:10,816
I can get the homework
assignment from Darlene later.
182
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:14,453
Dan, did you hear that?
Darlene went to school today!
183
00:09:15,622 --> 00:09:19,291
Well, I must say,
I had a great time tonight.
184
00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:20,993
Yeah, great time, great game.
185
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:23,929
But tiring.
Really, really tiring.
186
00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:27,466
That couch looks like
it's got my name on it.
187
00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:29,468
[yawn]
188
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:31,603
I just can't stop myself.
189
00:09:33,773 --> 00:09:36,875
Oh, Dan, it's early, now.
190
00:09:36,943 --> 00:09:39,645
And, mom, I think I see
your name on the couch
191
00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,347
Right here next to jake.
192
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,548
Come on, mom, sit.
193
00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:43,649
Sit, mom.
194
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:46,318
I'm fine standing.
195
00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,120
Well, how about a drink?
196
00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:50,723
I'll get her all
liquored up for ya.
197
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:55,461
Don't be ridiculous.
198
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:59,331
I only have the slightest nip
on special occasions.
199
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:02,301
Yeah, like every time
we celebrate dinner.
200
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:06,872
You could talk me into
a cup of coffee, though.
201
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,375
We're out of coffee, bev.
I think we're out of coffee.
202
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:11,543
Yeah, we're out of coffee.
And tea, there's no tea.
203
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:14,847
Come to think of it, we don't
have anything to eat or drink in the house.
204
00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:16,749
And we're out of toiler paper.
205
00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:20,019
Hey...
206
00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:24,623
Look, look, look,
207
00:10:24,691 --> 00:10:27,259
A glass of water
will be just fine.
208
00:10:27,327 --> 00:10:29,595
And then, maybe,
put a cherry in it.
209
00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:33,666
Oh, that sounds good!
I'll get some for everyone.
210
00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:37,002
Dan, go show mom
where we keep the cherries.
211
00:10:42,375 --> 00:10:45,044
So, Jake,
212
00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:47,713
I think my mother
really likes ya.
213
00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:49,581
Yeah, every time she
really likes somebody,
214
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:53,252
She acts real rude and dull.
215
00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:59,591
Well, then, I guess
your husband is crazy about me, too.
216
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,104
Darlene?
Out.
217
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,205
Can I ask you something?
218
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:15,240
I told you, Deej.
219
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:16,508
You were placed
with this family
220
00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:19,812
As part of a
scientific experiment.
221
00:11:19,879 --> 00:11:21,613
Eventually you'll be
returned to the trees
222
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,717
Where you can teach the others
what you've learned.
223
00:11:24,784 --> 00:11:26,652
Are you really gonna leave?
224
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:28,020
What are you talking about?
225
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:30,856
I heard David tell Molly
that you're running away.
226
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,827
He told her that?
227
00:11:34,894 --> 00:11:37,496
He's dead.
Man, is he dead.
228
00:11:37,564 --> 00:11:39,431
So are you running away?
229
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:42,768
No, Deej,
i'm not running away.
230
00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:46,438
But I want you to promise me
you won't tell mom and dad what David said.
231
00:11:46,506 --> 00:11:49,008
Well, if it's not true,
then why shouldn't I tell them?
232
00:11:49,075 --> 00:11:54,113
There's a couple ways
we can deal with this.
233
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:55,614
I could grab you
by the ears
234
00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:57,349
And bang your head
against the wall,
235
00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:59,284
Which is getting
a little old.
236
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:02,321
Or, for the first time
in your life, you can act like an adult,
237
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:05,557
Which is not going
to be easy with that haircut.
238
00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:11,363
I won't tell.
239
00:12:11,431 --> 00:12:13,732
Thanks.
240
00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:15,401
Darlene?
What?
241
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:17,102
Another thing happened.
242
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:18,103
Like?
243
00:12:18,171 --> 00:12:19,605
They kissed.
244
00:12:23,209 --> 00:12:24,576
They kissed?
245
00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:26,578
Uh-huh.
246
00:12:26,646 --> 00:12:27,646
On the lips?
247
00:12:27,714 --> 00:12:29,948
Uh-huh.
248
00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:31,350
Did they do anything else?
249
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:32,618
What else is there?
250
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:45,431
David.
251
00:12:45,498 --> 00:12:46,665
Oh, hey.
252
00:12:46,733 --> 00:12:48,801
How was the library?
253
00:12:48,868 --> 00:12:50,069
It was okay.
254
00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:52,638
I was reading this really
stupid thing about this guy
255
00:12:52,706 --> 00:12:55,774
Who cheated on
his girlfriend and...
256
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:00,946
Well, he told
a really big secret.
257
00:13:01,014 --> 00:13:05,517
So one night, his girlfriend
snuck up behind him
258
00:13:05,585 --> 00:13:09,822
And stabbed him, like,
500 or 600 times.
259
00:13:09,889 --> 00:13:14,727
You know, until
her hand cramped up.
260
00:13:19,699 --> 00:13:21,266
I didn't do anything, Darlene.
261
00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:22,334
She kissed me.
262
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:24,503
Oh, please, i've seen
you guys together.
263
00:13:24,571 --> 00:13:27,039
You've been trying to get
into each other's pants for months now.
264
00:13:27,107 --> 00:13:29,241
I can't believe I trusted you
to keep a secret.
265
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,043
I only told her
about our plans
266
00:13:31,111 --> 00:13:33,045
Because she said we weren't
serious about each other.
267
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:34,279
I was defending us.
268
00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:36,715
Oh, so while you were telling
her how serious we were,
269
00:13:36,783 --> 00:13:39,318
You were chewing
the buttons off her blouse?
270
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:42,788
This is insane.
271
00:13:42,856 --> 00:13:45,624
You expect me to feel
guilty, I didn't even do anything wrong.
272
00:13:45,692 --> 00:13:47,726
Oh, well, I wouldn't
want you to feel guilty,
273
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:48,727
So here's good news:
274
00:13:48,795 --> 00:13:50,362
I'm breaking up with you.
275
00:13:51,931 --> 00:13:53,232
So, what, that's it?
276
00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:54,967
We're not going to work
on the comic book?
277
00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:56,669
We're not even going
to hang out anymore together?
278
00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:58,837
We're breaking up, David.
It's over.
279
00:13:58,905 --> 00:14:01,707
Gee, can we still
not have sex?
280
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:08,847
That i'll give ya.
281
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,205
Hey, what do you
think you're doing?
282
00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:35,874
Forks go on the left.
283
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:41,980
Trouble in teen town?
284
00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:45,818
It's nothing.
285
00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:47,119
David?
286
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:48,854
You better tell us
what you're fighting about.
287
00:14:48,922 --> 00:14:52,591
Yeah, 'cause it's no fun
till we can take sides.
288
00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,994
It's kind of a long story.
289
00:14:56,062 --> 00:14:59,631
Basically, before I could
stop her, Molly kissed me.
290
00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:03,502
[descending whistle]
291
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:06,271
Oh, David, i'm so sorry
that your last meal
292
00:15:06,339 --> 00:15:08,540
Is going to be meatloaf.
293
00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:12,077
I didn't kiss her back,
294
00:15:12,145 --> 00:15:14,213
But Darlene broke up
with me anyway.
295
00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:17,349
I was completely right
and she was completely wrong.
296
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,651
Well, David, it really
doesn't matter
297
00:15:19,719 --> 00:15:22,588
Who's completely right
and who's completely wrong.
298
00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:27,960
See, it's your job as
the man to apologize to her.
299
00:15:28,028 --> 00:15:29,194
But it's not my fault.
300
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,263
Doesn't matter.
301
00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:41,573
So what does she do?
302
00:15:41,641 --> 00:15:43,942
Well, she gets to forgive you.
303
00:15:44,010 --> 00:15:45,678
She's the one who's wrong.
304
00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:47,646
Doesn't matter.
305
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:54,119
All right, fine,
i'll just go up there
306
00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,055
And apologize my guts out.
307
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:58,023
Take all the blame
and pretend that i'm wrong.
308
00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,858
At least i'll know i'm right.
309
00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:01,460
[cups clanging]
310
00:16:11,371 --> 00:16:13,472
Don't stop me, folks,
if you've heard this one.
311
00:16:13,540 --> 00:16:15,507
Knock, knock.
312
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:17,242
Jake, what do you
want to drink?
313
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,677
Knock, knock.
314
00:16:18,745 --> 00:16:20,846
We got cola or juice.
315
00:16:20,914 --> 00:16:22,715
Roseanne, knock, knock.
316
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:25,951
Dan, someone's at
the door for you.
317
00:16:27,020 --> 00:16:28,320
A little busy here, honey.
318
00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:30,422
D.J., would you go
see who's at the door?
319
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,157
Got it.
320
00:16:35,128 --> 00:16:38,330
And he's the one
we're most proud of.
321
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:39,932
Hey, I said I was sorry.
322
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,801
Apologies don't count
when mom made you do it.
323
00:16:42,869 --> 00:16:44,470
All right, fine.
Then i'm not sorry.
324
00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,171
You can go to hell.
325
00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:48,407
Look, Dan, my advice worked!
326
00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:50,275
They're talking again.
327
00:16:50,343 --> 00:16:52,211
There's no one at the door.
328
00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:54,580
What are you--
329
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,248
What are you guys mad about?
330
00:16:56,316 --> 00:16:57,416
I don't want to talk about it.
331
00:16:57,484 --> 00:16:58,650
No, i'd like
to talk about it.
332
00:16:58,718 --> 00:17:00,419
Boy, this brings back
great memories.
333
00:17:00,487 --> 00:17:03,188
My sister and I used to fight
like this all the time.
334
00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:06,492
So, come on.
What's your problem?
335
00:17:06,559 --> 00:17:08,994
I apologized,
I thought we had made up,
336
00:17:09,062 --> 00:17:11,296
And she wouldn't even kiss me.
337
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:12,898
Well, none of this
would have happened
338
00:17:12,966 --> 00:17:14,400
If he hadn't cheated on me.
339
00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:19,171
My sister and I
were never that close.
340
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:20,539
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
341
00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:22,174
Jake, David's not
one of our kids.
342
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:23,575
He's Darlene's
boyfriend. Oh.
343
00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:25,444
Not boyfriend.
Ex-boyfriend.
344
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,279
I'm trapped in this house
with my ex-boyfriend.
345
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:28,781
Well, you should
have thought of that
346
00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:30,516
Before you asked him
to move in here.
347
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:31,517
I'm only 16.
348
00:17:31,584 --> 00:17:33,619
Why were you
listening to me?
349
00:17:33,687 --> 00:17:34,953
Don't get mad at him.
350
00:17:35,021 --> 00:17:36,922
This is all your
fault, Darlene.
351
00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:39,725
You're right, it is my fault,
and i'm going to fix it.
352
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:41,460
I want him outta here, now.
353
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:42,461
David, get out.
354
00:17:42,529 --> 00:17:43,929
Sit down, David.
355
00:17:43,997 --> 00:17:47,166
If anybody gets to move out
of this house, it'll be me.
356
00:17:49,869 --> 00:17:52,037
[knocking on door]
357
00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:53,272
Can I come in?
358
00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:55,741
No, but you will.
359
00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:14,660
Well, David told me about
what happened with Molly
360
00:18:14,728 --> 00:18:15,928
And everything.
361
00:18:15,995 --> 00:18:19,665
And Molly is really different
than you, Darlene.
362
00:18:19,733 --> 00:18:25,437
She's very forward, but
I do believe what David said.
363
00:18:25,505 --> 00:18:28,807
I also know why you're upset.
364
00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:31,243
I'm not upset.
I'm not mad.
365
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:33,645
I'm not anything.
366
00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:35,914
Yeah, well, I think you are.
367
00:18:35,982 --> 00:18:38,250
But, you know, you always
cover up all your feelings
368
00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:42,855
With some really lame jokes
and some big, tough attitude.
369
00:18:42,922 --> 00:18:45,924
I wonder where the hell
you got that.
370
00:18:47,060 --> 00:18:48,627
Please don't tell me
i'm like you.
371
00:18:48,695 --> 00:18:51,430
I'm depressed enough.
372
00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:53,766
I mean, you know, if you're
thinking of shutting down
373
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:57,169
To keep all the bad stuff out,
you gotta remember, Darlene,
374
00:18:57,237 --> 00:18:59,972
You're not letting
any good stuff in, either.
375
00:19:01,541 --> 00:19:04,610
Okay, fine, you want me
to feel something?
376
00:19:04,678 --> 00:19:07,613
All right, i'm really
mad at myself.
377
00:19:07,681 --> 00:19:10,449
I mean, I told him I loved him.
What was I thinking?
378
00:19:12,919 --> 00:19:14,853
Well, I think you were
just being honest
379
00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:16,155
About your feelings, you know?
380
00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:19,425
And I know how tough that
is for you, Darlene, but
381
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,727
You know, you really
do love David.
382
00:19:21,795 --> 00:19:25,597
And you know that he's
totally crazy about you.
383
00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:29,535
Well, big fat gold star.
384
00:19:29,602 --> 00:19:32,071
Well, there's just no way
to avoid it, Darlene.
385
00:19:32,138 --> 00:19:34,039
Sometimes, you're going
to have to go against
386
00:19:34,107 --> 00:19:36,942
Everything I ever taught you
and learn to trust someone.
387
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:39,912
Even men.
388
00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:42,681
And David trusts you, Darlene.
389
00:19:42,749 --> 00:19:45,551
And I think you ought to give
him the benefit of the doubt.
390
00:19:45,618 --> 00:19:49,888
I just don't think one person
is worth this much.
391
00:19:51,758 --> 00:19:54,626
Well, I do.
I think you're worth this much.
392
00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:56,929
And I think david's
worth this much, too.
393
00:19:56,996 --> 00:19:58,430
You know, I really,
really like David.
394
00:19:58,498 --> 00:20:01,400
I think he's really
good for you.
395
00:20:01,468 --> 00:20:05,237
You know, he brings out the...
396
00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:07,740
Human in you.
397
00:20:09,943 --> 00:20:12,678
You say that like
it's a good thing.
398
00:20:16,783 --> 00:20:19,651
This sucks.
399
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,292
I love you, Darlene.
400
00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:33,332
And I love you best when you
let me be your mom.
401
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:37,870
Hey.
402
00:20:39,205 --> 00:20:40,205
Can he come in?
403
00:20:40,273 --> 00:20:42,508
I don't care.
404
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:47,546
Come on in.
405
00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:51,150
Well, I would love to stay
and help you some more,
406
00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:55,721
But I feel I should share
by wisdom with others.
407
00:20:59,225 --> 00:21:02,027
I want to take my
stuff back to my room.
408
00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:05,631
Fine.
Take whatever you want.
409
00:21:22,115 --> 00:21:23,515
What are you doing?
410
00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:26,952
Nothing.
You can go now.
411
00:21:27,020 --> 00:21:29,655
Are you crying?
412
00:21:29,723 --> 00:21:33,092
I didn't know
you could do that.
413
00:21:35,161 --> 00:21:37,696
What do you think I am,
some sort of freak or something?
414
00:21:37,764 --> 00:21:39,798
I mean, we're
breaking up here, David.
415
00:21:39,866 --> 00:21:42,001
Yeah, but you
broke up with me.
416
00:21:42,068 --> 00:21:45,070
You should be happy.
I should be upset.
417
00:21:45,138 --> 00:21:48,273
Well, sorry, i'll try
and get it right next time.
418
00:21:51,578 --> 00:21:54,613
David, I don't want
to break up with you.
419
00:21:54,681 --> 00:21:57,649
What?
420
00:21:57,717 --> 00:22:00,252
You don't?
421
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:01,854
It's just so weird.
422
00:22:01,921 --> 00:22:06,025
I'm not used to caring
this much about one person.
423
00:22:07,727 --> 00:22:13,265
Darlene, i've never
seen you like this before.
424
00:22:13,333 --> 00:22:17,102
I like it.
425
00:22:17,170 --> 00:22:19,571
Yeah, well, it's the new me.
426
00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:21,740
I'm going to start
painting sad clowns
427
00:22:21,808 --> 00:22:25,644
And writing little
poems to my cat.
428
00:22:56,276 --> 00:22:59,878
Okay, kids, enough making up.
429
00:22:59,946 --> 00:23:02,748
[screams]
430
00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:07,348
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
30714
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.