All language subtitles for Forgetting Sarah Marshall 2008.Unrated.1040p.BluRay.5.1.x264 . NVEE_English
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____________ . NVEE ____________
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Good for you, Pete. Good for you.
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BlLLY BUSH ON T.V.:
Access Hollywood spotlight
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00:01:22,374 --> 00:01:25,126
on sexy crime fighter Sarah Marshall.
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00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:27,879
Hi, everybody, welcome
to Access Hollywood. l'm Billy Bush.
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00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:30,298
Each week, millions of
viewers love to watch
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00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:33,551
Ms. Marshall's brainy sexpot character,
Maddy Stark,
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00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:36,596
alongside Billy Baldwin's
dark and brooding,
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hard-to-love lead detective, Hunter Rush.
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- And this isn't yourjurisdiction.
- l just made it my jurisdiction.
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00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,855
Can you say "catfight"?
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00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:49,233
BUSH: Off-screen, Sarah cozies up
12
00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:52,028
to her successful composer boyfriend,
Peter Bretter.
13
00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,321
He's no household name,
14
00:01:53,405 --> 00:01:56,031
yet Bretter's dark and
ominous score has
15
00:01:56,032 --> 00:01:58,785
set the tone for this
gruesome juggernaut.
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00:01:58,869 --> 00:02:00,286
Take a look.
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00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:04,957
What do you think?
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00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:10,254
l think it's gonna be hard
for her to re-enter the pageant
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00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,715
without a face.
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00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:20,765
BUSH: Looks like the sky's the limit
for this adorable couple.
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00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,975
Anything could happen.
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00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:32,026
We got to do something
We got to do something
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00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:34,821
Before Mother Earth gets anymore hurt
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00:02:34,905 --> 00:02:36,823
We got to do something
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BUSH: We leave you tonight with the newest
smash single from lnfant Sorrow.
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00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:45,289
Lead singer and notorious lothario,
Aldous Snow, begs us to change
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00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:48,459
in his environmental anthem,
We've Got to Do Something.
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00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:52,296
l hope, for once, we all hear the message.
Good night.
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00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:57,885
Mr. Prime Minister and Mr. President
You better see that it's not only me
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00:02:57,970 --> 00:03:01,472
No, a mob is rising in size
And they've been dying to scream
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00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:05,685
Hey, baby.
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00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:09,146
Just working.
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00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:12,024
Salad.
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00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:16,279
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally.
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00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:18,906
I didn't realize that
you were gonna be back so early.
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00:03:18,991 --> 00:03:21,534
Great. I'll see you in a bit.
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00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:24,620
Okay, bye.
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00:03:25,289 --> 00:03:28,124
lt's time to do something
39
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:34,213
Someone should do something
We got to do something
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00:03:34,298 --> 00:03:38,134
And that someone is you and you
And you and you
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00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:42,054
l pray it ain't all lost and gone
42
00:03:44,850 --> 00:03:48,060
l pray we might learn right from wrong
43
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And l pray this broken day
will not last too long
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00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:09,832
Hey, you got here fast.
I got a surprise for you.
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00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:15,379
Peter, as you know,
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I love you very much.
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00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:26,015
Are you breaking up with me?
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- Pete, are you...
- I just need a minute.
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Okay.
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00:04:58,382 --> 00:04:59,423
Please don't go.
51
00:04:59,449 --> 00:05:02,526
Why don't you just put on some clothes,
and we can sit down and discuss this.
52
00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:03,944
No. I can't do anything right now.
53
00:05:04,029 --> 00:05:05,721
I'm so sorry, Pete.
54
00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:07,482
I'm in love with you.
55
00:05:07,566 --> 00:05:09,433
Why don't you just
put some clothes on, okay?
56
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:11,268
I'm not going to go put clothes on.
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00:05:11,395 --> 00:05:15,106
I know what that means,
if I put clothes on, it's over. Okay?
58
00:05:17,609 --> 00:05:18,776
Excuse me.
59
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:28,619
Let's talk. Let's talk about him.
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00:05:30,789 --> 00:05:32,081
I feel...
61
00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:35,960
I've been feeling
62
00:05:37,129 --> 00:05:40,131
for a long time
that we've been growing apart.
63
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,592
We're leading different lives.
64
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,304
Who's the dude?
65
00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:49,765
- Who's the dude?
- What?
66
00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:54,186
No, that's not what this is about.
There's no one else.
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00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:56,480
I know what's happening here. I really do.
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00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,355
You've been working so
much lately, that we
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00:05:58,356 --> 00:05:59,984
haven't got to spend
much time together,
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00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,835
and you're forgetting
what it's like to be with me.
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00:06:01,836 --> 00:06:03,745
But maybe, if we just held each other
or something,
72
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:05,581
you would remember
what it's like to be with me.
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00:06:05,607 --> 00:06:06,991
- No.
- Just hold me.
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00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:14,415
Please. Here we go.
75
00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,340
There's someone else.
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00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:27,136
I'm sorry.
77
00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:47,990
We don't hang out in places like this,
Liz and I.
78
00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:52,828
Why did you take me here?
This place smells like stripper's perfume.
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00:06:52,954 --> 00:06:56,332
I'm gonna get herpes
just from sitting on this couch.
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00:06:56,833 --> 00:06:59,335
- Sure you okay, bro? Yeah?
- Yeah.
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00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:02,129
Yeah. You don't have to keep asking me.
I'm good.
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00:07:02,214 --> 00:07:04,715
- You're out!
- Thank you so much for this opportunity.
83
00:07:04,741 --> 00:07:06,475
- Auf Wiedersehen!
- Auf Wiedersehen!
84
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:10,137
MAN ON T.V.:
Thank you. Thank you all.
85
00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:11,347
Auf Wiedersehen!
86
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:15,226
I feel really good. I feel happy.
87
00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:18,229
Maybe you should work
on the Dracula musical.
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00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:21,507
Look, you've been working on it for a while.
It'll help your mind. Be creative.
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00:07:21,508 --> 00:07:23,726
- Think about you.
- I think I need to fuck somebody.
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00:07:23,793 --> 00:07:24,902
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
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00:07:25,028 --> 00:07:28,072
You're not my stepbrother anymore.
You're a step-stranger.
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00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,698
- Why you talking like that?
- Brian!
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00:07:29,825 --> 00:07:31,784
You don't need to put
your P in a V right now.
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00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:36,330
No, I don't.
I need to B my L on somebody's T's.
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00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,916
That's disgusting.
You don't need to be doing that.
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00:07:39,042 --> 00:07:41,627
And if anything,
you should leave your P in the V
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00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:45,339
and blow it inside the V,
so you can have a B-A-B-Y
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and be a normal person.
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00:07:46,758 --> 00:07:48,592
I'm leaving, man. I'm out of here.
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00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:52,555
She's fucking somebody.
Okay, Bri? It's all I can think about,
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00:07:52,681 --> 00:07:53,973
is that she's out there,
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00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:56,809
and until I do the same thing,
I'm gonna feel like I wanna die.
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00:07:56,893 --> 00:08:00,896
So just talk to girls with me tonight,
all right?
104
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:04,942
All right. All right, I'll help you out.
I'll talk to girls with you.
105
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:08,320
So, Peter, what do you do?
106
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:09,864
Musician.
107
00:08:09,948 --> 00:08:13,659
He's being modest.
He works on a show called Crime Scene.
108
00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:16,704
Oh, my God!
109
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:19,623
- It is what it is, you know?
- No, I love that show.
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00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:22,835
Wait, Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime
or Crime Scene: Phoenix?
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00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:26,755
- Scene of the Crime.
- Oh, my God! I love that show.
112
00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,885
I find you both very sexually attractive.
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00:08:32,596 --> 00:08:35,264
Let's pump the brakes. Okay?
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00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:37,683
I think that having sex with either of you
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00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:40,436
would be a great treat for me.
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00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:42,271
You are so funny.
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00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,275
I just got out of
a five-and-a-half-year relationship,
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00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:49,111
so I'm not looking for anything serious.
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00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:53,490
- Just sexual activity.
- Let's wrap it up, buddy.
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00:08:54,117 --> 00:08:55,910
You wanna come home?
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00:08:57,621 --> 00:09:00,122
I'm sorry, you're cracking me up.
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00:09:00,415 --> 00:09:01,957
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
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00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,959
Do you wanna come home?
124
00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,420
Stop it, seriously.
125
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:15,638
- That was fun.
- Yeah, yeah.
126
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:19,141
Overall, I think that
went really well. Yeah.
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00:09:28,385 --> 00:09:30,853
I want to have sex with you!
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00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:42,164
- Are you crying?
- What? No.
129
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:46,835
I'm sorry that I'm being so weird now.
130
00:09:47,128 --> 00:09:48,837
No, that's okay.
131
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,173
You've been weird
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00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:57,346
pretty much the whole time,
so it's not unusual. Okay.
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00:09:57,806 --> 00:10:00,382
Last night, like some
sort of idiot, I had
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00:10:00,383 --> 00:10:03,018
sex with this woman who
I barely even know.
135
00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,688
I used a condom, but
136
00:10:06,815 --> 00:10:09,692
I'm really scared that I have an STD, Doc.
137
00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:14,029
Peter, I'm a pediatrician. Have you noticed
you're sitting on a fire truck?
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00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:16,031
- Right.
- Little kids running?
139
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:19,702
- Yeah, this is new. I like it.
- I'm kind of backed up...
140
00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:22,288
Could you take a look at my penis?
141
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,208
Go ahead. Let me see it.
142
00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,877
- Sorry.
- That's all right. Take it out.
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00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:31,630
Good.
144
00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:34,183
- You barely looked at it.
- It's a good-looking dick, Peter.
145
00:10:34,209 --> 00:10:36,335
- Beautiful dick.
- Do you think maybe while I'm here,
146
00:10:36,419 --> 00:10:38,320
- I could get some blood work?
- Peter!
147
00:10:38,555 --> 00:10:42,308
Your girlfriend dumped you, right?
Are you hurting? Are you hurt?
148
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:46,812
Stop it. Stop crying. Use your dick.
Keep fucking. Fuck everything that moves.
149
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:47,980
Just wear a condom.
150
00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:51,650
Listen, I'm backed up,
I got a lot of kids. I gotta go, okay?
151
00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:55,321
You want something?
You want a balloon? You want a lolly?
152
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:06,665
I just came!
153
00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:27,936
Hi.
154
00:11:28,271 --> 00:11:30,606
- Hi.
- Hi.
155
00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:32,066
Hi.
156
00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,946
- Hi.
- Hi.
157
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:43,869
Okay, do you mind not saying that
over and over again?
158
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:46,455
You can gag me.
159
00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:53,128
- You brought a gag?
- And handcuffs.
160
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,423
Do you wanna gag me?
161
00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:58,634
Kind of, now.
162
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,308
What've we got today?
163
00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:08,769
Just a walk and talk at the lab.
164
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:13,816
That's what 20 years on
Vice will do to you.
165
00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:16,485
What've we got here?
166
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:19,655
The victim's penis was found
behind the AC unit.
167
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,490
Ouch!
168
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:24,118
Can you say "dicksicle"?
169
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,163
Let's do this.
170
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:30,707
Okay, I'm ready.
171
00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:35,796
The victim's penis
was found behind the AC unit.
172
00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:42,511
Just go with the usual stuff, maybe.
Something dark and ominous.
173
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:45,180
Like losing your penis is a bad thing.
174
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,185
Oh, you want dark and ominous.
175
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:54,606
Come on, I got Allman Brother tickets,
I gotta get out of here!
176
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:58,444
That's what 20 years on
Vice will do to you.
177
00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:01,613
What've we got here?
178
00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:03,949
Peter! Peter, Jesus Christ!
179
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:06,869
You're fucking Billy Baldwin, aren't you?
180
00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:09,455
- Aren't you?
- Pete, Pete, Pete.
181
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:11,540
- Stop staring at me.
- Pete!
182
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,795
You know you're not getting paid
for today's session, right?
183
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:19,214
- I'm aware of that.
- Fucking asshole.
184
00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:22,551
Peter, it's Brian.
185
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:25,053
Go away.
186
00:13:25,889 --> 00:13:28,107
Listen, your landlord called me.
187
00:13:28,191 --> 00:13:30,058
Said there's smoke
coming out of your place.
188
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,020
Who, Mr. Lopez? 'Cause he's a liar!
189
00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:34,730
He doesn't...
190
00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:36,899
We worry about you, Petey.
191
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,318
Yeah, come on, Peter. Open up the door.
192
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:42,696
The fire marshal's gonna come in
and bust it down.
193
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,646
You haven't been
out of the house in two weeks.
194
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:52,114
PETER: Why are you so damn strong?
195
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:54,383
I feel so strong!
196
00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:58,378
Hey, don't walk away from me.
You come close.
197
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:02,299
Your place is disgusting, Peter.
198
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,092
Hey, don't walk away from me.
199
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:05,427
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey!
200
00:14:05,637 --> 00:14:07,846
What are you burning, man? Come on.
201
00:14:07,931 --> 00:14:09,014
It's everything.
202
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:11,808
It's everything that reminds me of her
and I need it gone!
203
00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:16,104
Okay, I thought I was fine, Brian,
and I'm not. I'm not fine at all.
204
00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:19,107
Okay, let's just put the picture down.
205
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:22,152
Put that down. Let's discuss this.
206
00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:24,321
- I love her, man.
- I know.
207
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:30,327
Look, Liz and I, we think
the world of Sarah.
208
00:14:30,411 --> 00:14:32,287
We think she's great.
209
00:14:32,789 --> 00:14:34,748
Okay, but everything...
210
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:36,959
I'm just being honest here.
211
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:40,295
Every time she would come over
to our house,
212
00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:43,215
she always acted,
213
00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:47,678
you know, like a little bitch!
214
00:14:48,846 --> 00:14:50,722
Okay, okay, pump the brakes.
215
00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:54,101
Dating Sarah is not like dating Liz. Okay?
216
00:14:54,185 --> 00:14:56,144
Sarah is better than Liz.
217
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,981
You really wanna have this conversation?
218
00:14:59,816 --> 00:15:02,651
Do you really
wanna have this conversation?
219
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:04,887
Yes.
220
00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:06,947
- She is the mother of my unborn child.
- Sorry.
221
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:08,949
You're my stepbrother.
We're not even blood.
222
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:12,244
I have no qualms with sticking you.
I will equalize you.
223
00:15:12,704 --> 00:15:14,329
- Sorry.
- You dick!
224
00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:16,164
I'm just worked up.
225
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:19,585
You gotta get your shit together, man.
226
00:15:19,836 --> 00:15:22,588
I'm trying to. It's so hard here.
227
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:25,173
Brian, everywhere I look,
I'm reminded of her, okay?
228
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:28,093
Like, she got me this,
229
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:31,847
okay, because I would always leave
my cereal boxes open,
230
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,307
and the cereal would get stale,
231
00:15:33,391 --> 00:15:36,184
and so one day I came home,
and she had this waiting for me,
232
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:40,522
because it keeps my cereal fresh.
And now I have the freshest cereal.
233
00:15:43,518 --> 00:15:45,569
Why don't you,
you know what, go on a vacation?
234
00:15:45,653 --> 00:15:47,362
Go to the Alps.
235
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,324
- Alps?
- Go to Gstaad. It's the best.
236
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:51,642
I could go to Hawaii.
237
00:15:51,726 --> 00:15:55,020
Sarah was always talking about this place
in Hawaii that was supposed to be nice.
238
00:15:55,030 --> 00:15:56,439
No, don't. I wouldn't go there.
239
00:15:56,497 --> 00:16:00,125
What, I can't go to Hawaii now, because
Sarah Marshall has heard of Hawaii?
240
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:02,586
Then go to Hawaii. Go to Hawaii.
241
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:04,254
Do it.
242
00:16:10,053 --> 00:16:12,012
No, no, no, don't destroy the computer.
243
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:13,430
I'm just deleting these pictures.
244
00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:16,058
Okay, I need them off my computer.
245
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,812
You know what? You're not even doing
a proper permanent delete.
246
00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:22,147
Well...
247
00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:25,067
If we end up getting back together,
I wanna have a few of them left.
248
00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:26,193
You're crazy.
249
00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:29,196
- No, no, please don't delete them.
- They have to go. Done, done.
250
00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:46,254
SARAH: That was hilarious. Aloha!
251
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:49,408
l'm Sarah Marshall from Crime Scene:
Scene of the crime.
252
00:16:49,492 --> 00:16:52,460
And when l'm not scrubbing for evidence,
l'm flying Hawaiian Airlines...
253
00:16:52,545 --> 00:16:53,387
Excuse me! Hi.
254
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,246
...to my favorite destinations. Mahalo.
255
00:16:55,247 --> 00:16:57,056
Hi, can I have another bloody mary, please?
256
00:16:58,101 --> 00:17:00,227
You're still working on that one.
257
00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:02,854
It's just an anticipatory order.
258
00:17:02,939 --> 00:17:04,640
Okay, I'll be right back!
259
00:17:16,386 --> 00:17:18,954
SARAH: What do you think caused
such excessive bleeding?
260
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:23,208
RUSH: He was either stabbed in the aorta
or it was his time of the month.
261
00:17:34,929 --> 00:17:36,096
Aloha!
262
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:39,141
Check in this way.
263
00:17:49,944 --> 00:17:52,654
- Just married?
- Yes, how did you guess?
264
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:56,491
Oh, you've got that magic newlywed dust
all over you.
265
00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:00,078
- Oh, my wife.
- Oh, my husband.
266
00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:01,913
- Oh, my wife.
- My husband.
267
00:18:01,998 --> 00:18:03,957
My old ball and chain.
268
00:18:08,171 --> 00:18:10,630
You quit squirming and come here.
269
00:18:11,466 --> 00:18:13,592
What is into you?
270
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,886
Not me, yet.
271
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:20,015
Here is your room key.
So you're all set. Room 222.
272
00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:22,267
Room key's inside,
and the elevators are to the right.
273
00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:23,435
Mahalo.
274
00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:25,145
Congratulations.
275
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:29,858
Here you go, sir. Have some POG juice.
276
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,943
Welcome to Turtle Bay.
What can I do for you?
277
00:18:32,028 --> 00:18:34,237
I'm checking in.
My name's Bretter, Peter Bretter,
278
00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:36,490
but actually, I don't have a reservation.
279
00:18:36,574 --> 00:18:39,075
I just thought I'd take my chances.
280
00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,204
Bold!
281
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:46,875
We are all booked up,
but we do have the Kapua suite available.
282
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:49,795
- Okay. How much is that?
- $6,000 a night.
283
00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,739
- Wow.
- Beautiful views.
284
00:18:52,824 --> 00:18:55,066
I can imagine.
That's a little bit out of my price range.
285
00:18:55,151 --> 00:18:56,843
Sorry.
286
00:18:56,928 --> 00:18:59,346
That's a shame. This is a beautiful
287
00:19:01,224 --> 00:19:02,390
hotel.
288
00:19:03,226 --> 00:19:06,228
Oh, yeah, it's Sarah Marshall
from Crime Scene.
289
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,647
People are excited that she's here.
290
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:13,485
She's my ex-girlfriend.
We broke up three weeks ago.
291
00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:15,821
- I'm sorry, sir.
- Right. This is fine, right?
292
00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,824
- Sir?
- It's totally fine. Okay, there she is.
293
00:19:21,202 --> 00:19:24,062
- Did she see me? Is she coming over here?
- Uh-huh. Yup.
294
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:25,972
I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt.
295
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:29,042
Fair enough.
Why don't you try to unbutton it?
296
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,337
Button it back up.
297
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:35,215
- Peter!
- Hey.
298
00:19:35,883 --> 00:19:38,093
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
299
00:19:38,553 --> 00:19:40,512
Came here to murder you.
300
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:43,473
Really, what are you doing here?
301
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:47,561
I have been having a tough time,
you know, back in LA.
302
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:50,689
But then I came here, and here you are.
303
00:19:51,148 --> 00:19:53,441
I just think that's too crazy to be...
304
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,069
Hello there, you little sex object.
305
00:19:56,153 --> 00:19:58,864
I've lost a shoe.
Have you seen it anywhere?
306
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:03,076
It's like this one, but, you know,
obviously it's the opposite one.
307
00:20:04,453 --> 00:20:09,708
Excuse me, missus, I've lost a shoe.
Like this one. It's like this one's fellow.
308
00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:12,919
- Sort of the exact opposite, in fact, of that.
- RACHEL: Uh-huh.
309
00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:15,422
Not an evil version, but just, you know,
310
00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:19,759
a shoe like this, but for the other foot.
Otherwise, I'd have two right...
311
00:20:19,844 --> 00:20:21,303
Aldous, this is Peter.
312
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:25,265
Hey, all right, Peter.
Nice to meet you, mate. Aldous.
313
00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:28,685
- Good to meet you, man.
- My ex-boyfriend.
314
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:30,937
Right. Hey, I'm Aldous Snow.
315
00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:33,440
I know who you are.
Yeah, you're very, very famous.
316
00:20:33,524 --> 00:20:35,525
Yeah, I am. I am for my sins.
317
00:20:35,610 --> 00:20:37,669
So are you staying here, as well?
318
00:20:37,754 --> 00:20:39,629
- I'm not, as a matter of fact...
- I'm sorry.
319
00:20:39,714 --> 00:20:42,157
Excuse me, Mr. Bretter, Ms. Marshall,
320
00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:46,453
but we were able to book the
Kapua suite for you, sir, for four nights.
321
00:20:49,206 --> 00:20:50,999
- You were?
- Yes, sir.
322
00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:55,211
- Marvelous.
- Perfect. Perfect amount of time.
323
00:20:55,296 --> 00:20:57,797
Listen, if you wanna have dinner with us
one of those nights...
324
00:20:57,882 --> 00:20:59,299
- Aldous.
- ...feel very...
325
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:00,225
No.
326
00:21:00,309 --> 00:21:02,802
That's very gentlemanly of you,
but you two enjoy your trip.
327
00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:04,971
I'll be just fine on my own.
328
00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:07,682
- All right, Peter.
- The Kapua suite...
329
00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:11,519
- Have a good trip, Pete.
- I like your shirt. It's colorful.
330
00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:13,104
- Bye.
- Bye now.
331
00:21:13,397 --> 00:21:15,899
Ta-ta. I was wearing two shoes
this morning, right?
332
00:21:21,364 --> 00:21:25,200
Thank you. Thank you for bailing me out.
I still can't afford that room.
333
00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:28,203
Nobody can. It's for, like,
Oprah or, like, CĂ©line Dion.
334
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:29,479
Really, it's not a big deal.
335
00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:32,423
So you can stay in the suite,
but since you're not technically a guest,
336
00:21:32,491 --> 00:21:34,501
you have to clean up after yourself.
337
00:21:34,585 --> 00:21:37,170
Otherwise, here is your room key
338
00:21:38,214 --> 00:21:40,006
and enjoy your stay.
339
00:21:41,092 --> 00:21:43,301
Why are you doing this for me?
340
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:48,348
She's here with some guy already?
Kind of messed up.
341
00:21:48,766 --> 00:21:50,183
- Right?
- Yeah.
342
00:21:51,644 --> 00:21:53,395
- Thank you.
- Really, it's not a big deal.
343
00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:54,854
Go enjoy yourself.
344
00:21:54,939 --> 00:21:57,857
Rachel Jansen.
A thousand times, thank you,
345
00:21:57,942 --> 00:22:00,318
- you know what I mean...
- Go enjoy yourself.
346
00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:02,762
- This is a disaster!
- BRlAN ON PHONE: Calm down, man.
347
00:22:02,814 --> 00:22:04,506
Are there other hotels on the island?
348
00:22:04,591 --> 00:22:06,466
Of course there are other hotels,
349
00:22:06,470 --> 00:22:08,871
but I'm not leaving here,
it'll look like I'm running away.
350
00:22:08,936 --> 00:22:11,871
Wait. Why are you whispering?
You're not following them, are you?
351
00:22:11,956 --> 00:22:13,123
I had a girlfriend, right?
352
00:22:13,207 --> 00:22:17,335
And Liam and Noel Gallagher both had
it off with her right in front of me,
353
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:18,795
so that's similar.
354
00:22:18,879 --> 00:22:20,380
And that was a bit awkward, actually.
355
00:22:20,464 --> 00:22:23,425
So if you do wanna change hotels,
I quite understand.
356
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:26,052
No, no, I'm not changing hotels.
357
00:22:26,137 --> 00:22:28,388
Stop following
and just go back to your room, Peter.
358
00:22:28,472 --> 00:22:30,557
- They're gone!
- Why are you looking for them?
359
00:22:30,641 --> 00:22:32,517
- I don't know.
- You're acting like an idiot.
360
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:34,561
Run! Get out of there! Go to your room!
361
00:22:34,645 --> 00:22:36,730
- What do you think they're doing?
- Peter, go.
362
00:22:36,814 --> 00:22:38,332
Oh, God! Okay, there they are.
363
00:22:38,416 --> 00:22:40,625
- There they are, I see them.
- Go back to your room, Peter.
364
00:22:40,626 --> 00:22:42,552
Peter, go back to your room.
Go back to your room, Peter.
365
00:22:42,553 --> 00:22:43,437
I'm going in.
366
00:22:43,487 --> 00:22:45,696
Go back to your room, Peter.
Are you listening to me?
367
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:47,708
Peter, go back to your room.
Peter, Peter, Peter...
368
00:22:47,783 --> 00:22:48,825
Hey!
369
00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:52,037
Hey, nice room.
370
00:22:52,204 --> 00:22:53,788
BRlAN ON PHONE: Go!
371
00:22:54,331 --> 00:22:56,291
I am in the Kapua suite.
372
00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:59,294
What are you doing? Sucker!
373
00:22:59,378 --> 00:23:00,628
Have fun.
374
00:23:02,131 --> 00:23:04,174
Listen, you piece of shit!
375
00:23:04,675 --> 00:23:08,970
You're an idiot. Back to your room, Peter.
Peter, back to your room.
376
00:23:10,973 --> 00:23:12,307
Did you enjoy that?
377
00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:14,976
- Did you like what you saw?
- That hurt a lot.
378
00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:18,146
But I know Sarah,
and I'm pretty sure I just ruined her day.
379
00:23:33,829 --> 00:23:35,747
You know
how we thought the killer masturbated
380
00:23:35,831 --> 00:23:37,999
before he committed each homicide?
381
00:23:38,084 --> 00:23:39,834
That's the theory.
382
00:23:39,919 --> 00:23:42,170
Take a look at the microscope.
383
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:47,342
Oh, yeah, looks like where he's going,
384
00:23:48,552 --> 00:23:51,179
he'll need to know how to masturbate.
385
00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:04,526
Oh, God!
386
00:24:09,115 --> 00:24:11,116
- Hello.
- RACHEL ON PHONE: Hey, Peter?
387
00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:14,369
- Sarah?
- No.
388
00:24:14,453 --> 00:24:17,789
It's Rachel Jansen, from the front desk.
389
00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:22,710
- Hey!
- Hey, what's going on up there?
390
00:24:22,795 --> 00:24:26,047
I'm getting complaints
about a woman crying hysterically.
391
00:24:26,132 --> 00:24:29,092
Yeah, you know what, I hear her, too,
392
00:24:29,218 --> 00:24:32,470
and it sounds like
she's having such a hard time.
393
00:24:32,555 --> 00:24:35,306
I think it's coming from
the floor above me.
394
00:24:35,391 --> 00:24:37,392
You're on the top floor.
395
00:24:39,311 --> 00:24:41,312
I'll try to keep it down.
396
00:24:41,897 --> 00:24:44,357
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, you have a nice night.
397
00:24:44,441 --> 00:24:45,567
Okay.
398
00:25:00,249 --> 00:25:04,502
I would love to sell you some weed, Jeremy,
but I'm at my fucking job right now.
399
00:25:04,587 --> 00:25:08,840
Obviously, because you called me at work,
you know that I'm at my place of work.
400
00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,884
So I can't just leave here
and sell you some weed.
401
00:25:10,968 --> 00:25:13,344
I can sell you some weed when I'm done.
402
00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:17,015
Hold on, I gotta call you back.
Mahalo, all right.
403
00:25:17,099 --> 00:25:19,392
- Hey, how's it going?
- Hey.
404
00:25:19,476 --> 00:25:21,186
I'd just like to grab some dinner, please.
405
00:25:21,270 --> 00:25:24,272
- Okay, great. Is your wife gonna meet you?
- No.
406
00:25:25,191 --> 00:25:26,774
Your girlfriend?
407
00:25:28,027 --> 00:25:30,320
No, I don't have a girlfriend.
408
00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:34,866
- You're just by yourself?
- Yeah.
409
00:25:35,367 --> 00:25:36,701
Sucks.
410
00:25:36,785 --> 00:25:39,805
Okay, so just one. Here's your wine list
and your menu. Come on.
411
00:25:39,889 --> 00:25:41,748
Do you want, like, a magazine
or something?
412
00:25:41,832 --> 00:25:44,042
It's gonna be boring
if you're just sitting by yourself.
413
00:25:44,126 --> 00:25:45,335
I'll be all right. Thank you.
414
00:25:45,461 --> 00:25:47,712
I just would be so depressed.
415
00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:49,172
- Yeah.
- Here you go.
416
00:25:49,298 --> 00:25:50,298
Thank you.
417
00:25:51,300 --> 00:25:54,844
The best thing is,
you have the greatest table in the house.
418
00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:57,096
- Oh, yeah?
- That's Aldous Snow right there.
419
00:25:57,181 --> 00:25:58,907
I know. I know, dude. I know.
420
00:25:58,942 --> 00:26:01,759
- I'm gonna ask him. I'll ask him politely.
- No, please don't, please.
421
00:26:02,853 --> 00:26:03,978
Mate!
422
00:26:04,664 --> 00:26:07,398
Why don't you come over and sit with us?
You'll be very welcome.
423
00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:10,735
No, thank you. I need a drink.
424
00:26:11,904 --> 00:26:14,072
Would you guys like a drink?
425
00:26:14,156 --> 00:26:16,491
Well, no, actually, because...
426
00:26:16,742 --> 00:26:20,370
Seven years clean.
That's what this tattoo denotes.
427
00:26:20,496 --> 00:26:22,830
Seven years free from drugs and alcohol.
428
00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:25,166
If I have just one sip of wine,
429
00:26:25,251 --> 00:26:28,870
by the end of the evening, I'll be,
like, rimming waiters for their tips
430
00:26:28,955 --> 00:26:30,663
just to get me hands on a rock.
431
00:26:30,747 --> 00:26:32,615
You know what I mean? Nasty.
432
00:26:33,759 --> 00:26:36,511
- MATTHEW: I heard that.
- Hey, what's up, man?
433
00:26:36,929 --> 00:26:38,721
How are you enjoying
your vegetable medley?
434
00:26:38,847 --> 00:26:40,265
It's mundane.
435
00:26:40,891 --> 00:26:43,351
It is mundane. It's great, I know.
436
00:26:43,435 --> 00:26:45,103
Will you marry me?
437
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,438
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yes!
438
00:26:47,564 --> 00:26:49,190
- She said yes!
- Beautiful.
439
00:26:50,025 --> 00:26:51,317
Congratulations!
440
00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:57,532
I'm so excited! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
441
00:26:58,367 --> 00:26:59,575
Peter!
442
00:27:02,204 --> 00:27:03,538
What's up?
443
00:27:04,248 --> 00:27:06,291
- Are you doing okay?
- Yeah.
444
00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:08,042
Yeah, I'm good.
445
00:27:09,169 --> 00:27:13,006
Look, did you follow me here?
Did my assistant tell you I was coming?
446
00:27:13,090 --> 00:27:14,507
- No.
- Did you talk to her?
447
00:27:14,591 --> 00:27:18,803
No, I didn't talk to your assistant.
It's not all about you, you know.
448
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:23,558
Hawaii is a beautiful place. People
come here, usually not to follow you.
449
00:27:23,892 --> 00:27:26,644
So you're really staying?
You're gonna stay?
450
00:27:26,729 --> 00:27:30,565
Yeah, I think so. I really like it here.
I feel at home here.
451
00:27:30,858 --> 00:27:32,400
I just love it.
452
00:27:33,569 --> 00:27:35,111
Yeah, you should stay.
453
00:27:35,237 --> 00:27:37,572
I appreciate your consideration.
454
00:27:37,865 --> 00:27:40,450
Sounds like Aldous probably
shared a lot of needles,
455
00:27:40,576 --> 00:27:42,994
so thank you for dating him after me.
456
00:27:43,078 --> 00:27:44,746
- I appreciate that.
- Hmm.
457
00:27:46,081 --> 00:27:50,001
- Hope you have a really good time here.
- Have a great dinner.
458
00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:51,419
Thank you.
459
00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:54,088
Groupie whore.
460
00:27:54,590 --> 00:27:56,132
Psycho stalker.
461
00:27:56,592 --> 00:28:01,262
You know what? It's vacation. I think
I'll just take a piña colada, please.
462
00:28:09,313 --> 00:28:13,816
Look at this guy.
463
00:28:15,736 --> 00:28:18,654
Not us, buddy. Right? Not us.
464
00:28:18,781 --> 00:28:22,617
I'm on Sex and the City.
What's up, Miranda?
465
00:28:23,619 --> 00:28:27,663
I'm Samantha. I have sex with everyone.
466
00:28:27,790 --> 00:28:29,749
Maybe it's a good thing that they're here.
467
00:28:29,833 --> 00:28:32,752
You know what I mean?
Maybe this is a challenge from God
468
00:28:32,836 --> 00:28:34,921
for me to forget her. You know?
469
00:28:35,005 --> 00:28:39,300
Or maybe it's a sign from God
that you should be with her.
470
00:28:40,177 --> 00:28:41,844
I love her show.
471
00:28:42,346 --> 00:28:45,681
When they mix the sexuality
and the violence, I like it.
472
00:28:45,808 --> 00:28:48,101
What the hell is wrong with you two?
You gotta move on.
473
00:28:48,185 --> 00:28:50,395
I hear you say that, but
it's not that easy.
474
00:28:50,479 --> 00:28:52,688
It's that easy. Promise you it is.
475
00:28:52,815 --> 00:28:54,524
I lived in South Central.
476
00:28:54,650 --> 00:28:57,402
South Central. And I hated it.
477
00:28:57,486 --> 00:28:58,778
That's why I moved to Oahu.
478
00:28:58,862 --> 00:29:01,114
Now I can name you
over 200 different kinds of fish.
479
00:29:01,198 --> 00:29:02,865
- No, you can't.
- Oh, yes, I can.
480
00:29:02,991 --> 00:29:04,367
- Do it.
- Yeah, you cannot.
481
00:29:04,493 --> 00:29:09,539
G. Ghost pipefish, grill fish, goaler fish
grouper fish, greenback...
482
00:29:09,665 --> 00:29:11,374
What's the state fish of Hawaii?
483
00:29:11,500 --> 00:29:13,084
Humuhumunukunukuapua'a.
484
00:29:13,168 --> 00:29:14,877
- Yeah, bitch.
- Hey.
485
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:18,297
- You ready?
- Yeah, just gonna close up.
486
00:29:21,176 --> 00:29:25,054
Hello, Mr. Bretter, Mr. Brayden.
Where's your wife, sir?
487
00:29:25,514 --> 00:29:27,849
She is in bed.
488
00:29:27,975 --> 00:29:29,892
How are things going with the lady?
489
00:29:30,018 --> 00:29:34,188
Not awesome.
She's complicated, like The Da Vinci Code,
490
00:29:35,023 --> 00:29:37,900
you know, but harder to crack.
491
00:29:39,194 --> 00:29:43,072
But life is full of lessons.
You learn something new every day.
492
00:29:44,741 --> 00:29:47,493
Wonder what I'm going to learn tomorrow.
493
00:29:48,912 --> 00:29:50,037
Well.
494
00:29:50,664 --> 00:29:52,081
- Good night, sir.
- Good night.
495
00:29:52,207 --> 00:29:53,291
Good night, sir.
496
00:29:53,375 --> 00:29:56,085
Off to find the mythical clitoris.
497
00:29:57,379 --> 00:30:02,675
So, Peter, were you able to get
that crying lady out of your room?
498
00:30:03,286 --> 00:30:05,344
'Cause I could send someone up,
if you want.
499
00:30:05,429 --> 00:30:07,263
- Oh, you could?
- Yeah.
500
00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:10,850
That's very funny. It is.
501
00:30:11,935 --> 00:30:16,105
Well, listen, Sarah Marshall Show sucks.
Who cares?
502
00:30:16,231 --> 00:30:18,900
I do the music for that program.
503
00:30:20,068 --> 00:30:22,570
Did I mention that the music rocks?
504
00:30:24,114 --> 00:30:27,783
That's very sweet of you.
That's very sweet of you to say.
505
00:30:27,910 --> 00:30:29,952
You don't have to say that, though.
It's not music.
506
00:30:30,078 --> 00:30:32,705
There's no melody, it's just tones.
507
00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,916
Just dark, ominous tones.
508
00:30:36,585 --> 00:30:39,795
"The masturbating dog killer
is on the loose again.
509
00:30:39,922 --> 00:30:42,590
"He'll kill the owner,
but at least the dogs are happy."
510
00:30:49,556 --> 00:30:52,225
I'm no Aldous Snow, I guess, you know.
511
00:30:57,105 --> 00:30:59,899
Time to start the music
512
00:31:00,150 --> 00:31:02,151
All gonna light the light
513
00:31:02,736 --> 00:31:08,574
Yeah, yeah, gonna get things started
on The Muppet Show tonight
514
00:31:14,331 --> 00:31:17,083
- Whipped cream or berry?
- Whipped cream.
515
00:31:18,794 --> 00:31:22,088
Here we are, sir. Have
a wonderful breakfast.
516
00:31:22,422 --> 00:31:24,799
What a lovely table, so
close to the buffet.
517
00:31:24,925 --> 00:31:27,426
I'm glad you like it. Mahalo.
518
00:31:30,806 --> 00:31:33,099
Good morning, sir.
Can I start you with anything?
519
00:31:33,183 --> 00:31:34,392
Orange juice, coffee?
520
00:31:34,476 --> 00:31:37,979
What about, like, some pineapple juice
with a little bit of rum on the side.
521
00:31:38,105 --> 00:31:41,983
Of course. I like your style. Cocktail guy.
522
00:31:42,067 --> 00:31:44,068
- Thank you.
- You are welcome.
523
00:31:44,152 --> 00:31:46,112
We've already reserved
the sea kayak for noon.
524
00:31:46,196 --> 00:31:49,115
Honey, I know that,
but you know that I wanted to see...
525
00:31:49,199 --> 00:31:52,743
- Hey. Hello there, friend.
- Hey.
526
00:31:52,828 --> 00:31:55,288
How are you guys? How was your evening?
527
00:31:55,372 --> 00:31:56,747
- Great.
- Awesome.
528
00:31:56,999 --> 00:31:59,584
- I can't feel anything.
- All right.
529
00:32:00,085 --> 00:32:02,461
- Does that feel good?
- I still can't feel anything.
530
00:32:02,546 --> 00:32:04,755
Okay, 'cause it hurts me.
531
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,675
- Would you do that for me?
- Yeah.
532
00:32:08,594 --> 00:32:12,388
- Yeah.
- No, no, no. No.
533
00:32:12,889 --> 00:32:15,850
God put our mouths on our head
for a reason. No!
534
00:32:18,270 --> 00:32:20,730
- I'm going to the bathroom.
- Okay.
535
00:32:21,690 --> 00:32:26,694
- Is everything okay with...
- Waffles.
536
00:32:30,198 --> 00:32:33,534
- Here you go, sir. Breakfast of champions.
- Oh, thank you.
537
00:32:33,619 --> 00:32:38,289
And don't tell anybody, but...
A little extra love for you.
538
00:32:40,042 --> 00:32:41,125
Thank you.
539
00:32:41,209 --> 00:32:43,628
- Take it easy.
- You, too.
540
00:32:56,308 --> 00:32:58,142
- Hi.
- Hi.
541
00:32:58,226 --> 00:32:59,685
This is the yoga place, yeah?
542
00:32:59,770 --> 00:33:03,064
Yes. But there's no alcohol allowed
in the studio.
543
00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:07,985
Oh, no, I mean, obviously.
This is just pineapple juice.
544
00:33:09,237 --> 00:33:12,657
Well, there's no outside drinks
allowed in the studio.
545
00:33:13,617 --> 00:33:15,034
- Can I set it down?
- Sure.
546
00:33:15,118 --> 00:33:17,411
- Cool, thank you.
- I like your hat.
547
00:33:17,496 --> 00:33:20,623
- Thank you.
- Please remove it before class.
548
00:33:23,335 --> 00:33:26,504
Hey, everyone,
why don't you all grab your mats?
549
00:33:28,423 --> 00:33:32,802
Sorry, I recognize you from the cover
of Namaste Magazine. I'm a huge fan.
550
00:33:32,928 --> 00:33:35,179
Thank you. That's so sweet of you to say.
551
00:33:35,263 --> 00:33:39,016
I appreciate that.
Obviously, I don't do yoga for recognition.
552
00:33:39,101 --> 00:33:43,020
Right, of course you wouldn't.
Then stop being so good at it.
553
00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:47,441
That's very flexible. That's nice.
554
00:33:49,611 --> 00:33:52,863
- And, you, I recognize you from your show.
- Thank you.
555
00:33:52,948 --> 00:33:55,449
You seem much taller on your show.
556
00:33:56,201 --> 00:33:58,536
- I'm not.
- No, I know.
557
00:34:00,622 --> 00:34:04,041
Okay, if you just wanna start
by bringing your palms into your chest.
558
00:34:04,126 --> 00:34:07,962
Today we're gonna start with
the Surya Namaskar, or Sun Salutation.
559
00:34:08,046 --> 00:34:10,214
Let's take a deep inhale in.
560
00:34:10,799 --> 00:34:12,883
Exhale and release the hands.
561
00:34:12,968 --> 00:34:15,803
Inhale, arms up to the sky. Continue.
562
00:34:16,805 --> 00:34:19,807
Good, exhale and folding forward.
563
00:34:20,475 --> 00:34:24,603
Strong, strong backs. Good, excellent.
564
00:34:24,688 --> 00:34:26,564
Remember this is not a competition,
565
00:34:26,648 --> 00:34:29,066
although you two seem
to be the best in the class.
566
00:34:29,151 --> 00:34:31,610
Excellent. Perfect form, you two, perfect.
567
00:34:31,695 --> 00:34:34,405
Coming up into downward-facing dog.
568
00:34:35,031 --> 00:34:37,324
Good. It's really important in this pose,
569
00:34:37,409 --> 00:34:40,703
that you arch your back
and keep it flat at the same time.
570
00:34:40,829 --> 00:34:43,372
I feel like those are opposing ideas.
571
00:34:43,498 --> 00:34:47,710
No, they're not, 'cause you're arching
your back up while it's flat.
572
00:34:47,836 --> 00:34:48,919
Okay.
573
00:34:51,381 --> 00:34:55,676
Good, yeah, sweat it out.
Sweat out all the toxins from this morning.
574
00:34:55,927 --> 00:34:58,095
- Come on, lady.
- My name is Prana,
575
00:34:58,180 --> 00:35:00,556
and I know that wasn't just juice.
576
00:35:00,682 --> 00:35:05,227
You don't really need any adjusting,
so I'm just gonna do this for myself.
577
00:35:05,771 --> 00:35:08,022
Just to learn from your body,
578
00:35:08,190 --> 00:35:09,940
memorize your body.
579
00:35:10,692 --> 00:35:13,360
- Good. Strong legs.
- Come on.
580
00:35:14,237 --> 00:35:16,238
Perfect skin and form.
581
00:35:17,199 --> 00:35:20,284
Okay, class, I'd like to now
move into a tripod headstand.
582
00:35:20,368 --> 00:35:22,161
This is more of an advanced pose,
583
00:35:22,245 --> 00:35:25,039
so if you don't feel comfortable
or strong enough,
584
00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:28,876
please feel free to just lay on your mat
in child's pose.
585
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:30,294
I got it.
586
00:35:30,378 --> 00:35:33,506
All right, so let's all
come down to our mats.
587
00:35:33,590 --> 00:35:36,501
Get in a prep position
for the tripod headstand.
588
00:35:36,585 --> 00:35:38,010
If you don't feel comfortable,
589
00:35:38,094 --> 00:35:41,263
there's no shame
in just laying on your mat in child's pose.
590
00:35:41,389 --> 00:35:42,848
PETER: Lady, I got it.
591
00:35:42,933 --> 00:35:45,893
Good, so let's prep to come up. Good.
592
00:35:47,270 --> 00:35:50,356
Sir, if you just want to lay down
in child's pose.
593
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:51,482
Now, you all heard me say,
594
00:35:51,566 --> 00:35:54,652
"If you want to be in child's pose,
that's okay."
595
00:35:54,736 --> 00:35:56,821
- Just in case he gets hurt.
- Bring it, bring it.
596
00:35:56,905 --> 00:35:59,156
I don't want you to break your neck.
597
00:35:59,241 --> 00:36:00,825
- What's up?
- Just relax.
598
00:36:00,909 --> 00:36:02,868
My legs, that's what.
599
00:36:02,953 --> 00:36:05,120
We're doing quiet headstands today.
600
00:36:05,247 --> 00:36:07,965
I'm doing a handstand, motherfucker!
I'm doing a handstand.
601
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:09,967
Okay, you know, why don't we just release.
602
00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:11,377
Thank God.
603
00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:14,255
Good, everybody. Good.
604
00:36:18,510 --> 00:36:19,635
Hey.
605
00:36:19,886 --> 00:36:21,387
Are you Chuck?
606
00:36:21,471 --> 00:36:24,890
Oh, man, you know,
they won't change that flyer.
607
00:36:25,183 --> 00:36:28,519
That's my mainland name.
My Hawaiian name is Koonu.
608
00:36:28,854 --> 00:36:30,229
Cool, sorry.
609
00:36:30,313 --> 00:36:31,564
No, it's all good.
610
00:36:31,648 --> 00:36:34,692
Does Koonu have some, like,
cool Hawaiian meaning?
611
00:36:34,776 --> 00:36:36,652
It means Chuck.
612
00:36:36,736 --> 00:36:38,279
I plugged it into a database.
613
00:36:38,363 --> 00:36:41,615
There's a thing you can go on, on the
Internet, you just type in your name,
614
00:36:41,783 --> 00:36:43,617
and it just says it.
615
00:36:44,411 --> 00:36:45,870
What's your name?
616
00:36:45,954 --> 00:36:47,146
- I'm Peter.
- Peter.
617
00:36:47,230 --> 00:36:49,114
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna give you a Hawaiian name.
618
00:36:49,199 --> 00:36:50,432
Oh, great.
619
00:36:53,837 --> 00:36:55,254
Pepiopi.
620
00:36:57,424 --> 00:36:59,758
- Great.
- Pepiopi, looks like you've got a little pain
621
00:36:59,843 --> 00:37:01,719
behind those eyes.
622
00:37:03,179 --> 00:37:05,055
Yeah, maybe a little.
623
00:37:05,849 --> 00:37:07,933
There's really only one cure for that.
624
00:37:08,018 --> 00:37:09,101
What's that?
625
00:37:09,185 --> 00:37:10,895
Weed. You got any?
626
00:37:13,148 --> 00:37:15,566
- No.
- Well, then let's go surfing.
627
00:37:18,653 --> 00:37:21,864
Okay, when we're out there,
I want you to ignore your instincts.
628
00:37:21,948 --> 00:37:25,075
I'm gonna be your instincts.
Koonu will be your instincts.
629
00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:26,619
Don't do anything.
630
00:37:26,703 --> 00:37:29,079
Don't try to surf, don't do it.
631
00:37:29,956 --> 00:37:32,291
The less you do, the more you do.
632
00:37:32,375 --> 00:37:34,752
Let's see you pop up. Pop it up!
633
00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:39,924
That's not it at all.
634
00:37:40,008 --> 00:37:42,968
Do less. Get down. Try less. Do it again.
635
00:37:43,762 --> 00:37:44,970
Pop up.
636
00:37:45,639 --> 00:37:47,306
No, too slow. Do less.
637
00:37:47,390 --> 00:37:50,267
Pop up.
638
00:37:50,352 --> 00:37:52,645
You're doing too much. Do less. Pop down.
639
00:37:52,729 --> 00:37:53,979
Pop up now.
640
00:37:54,064 --> 00:37:55,439
Stop! Get down. Get down there.
641
00:37:55,523 --> 00:37:57,650
Remember, don't do anything.
642
00:37:58,318 --> 00:37:59,985
Nothing. Pop up.
643
00:38:02,114 --> 00:38:04,039
Well, you... No, you
gotta do more than that,
644
00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:05,507
'cause you're just laying right out.
645
00:38:05,508 --> 00:38:07,050
It looks like you're boogie-boarding.
646
00:38:07,060 --> 00:38:08,928
Just do it. Feel it. Pop up.
647
00:38:10,413 --> 00:38:13,415
Yeah. That wasn't quite it,
but we're gonna figure it out, out there.
648
00:38:13,500 --> 00:38:14,583
Let's go surfing, come on.
649
00:38:14,668 --> 00:38:16,669
Everybody's learning how, come on and...
650
00:38:16,753 --> 00:38:19,088
The weather outside is weather
651
00:38:20,674 --> 00:38:22,800
How long you lived out here?
652
00:38:22,884 --> 00:38:25,803
Man, I don't know. I quit wearing a watch
when I moved out here.
653
00:38:25,887 --> 00:38:28,305
- Wow, that's so cool.
- Yeah.
654
00:38:28,390 --> 00:38:32,518
No, like my cell phone has a clock on it,
so I don't really need it.
655
00:38:32,602 --> 00:38:35,354
Right, so it's basically the same thing.
656
00:38:35,855 --> 00:38:39,149
- How old are you?
- I don't really believe in age or numbers,
657
00:38:39,234 --> 00:38:42,069
you know, I don't...
I mean, if you had to put a number on it,
658
00:38:42,153 --> 00:38:44,613
I guess I'd be 44.
659
00:38:46,908 --> 00:38:48,117
Fuck!
660
00:38:48,868 --> 00:38:51,161
Thanks for taking me out here.
661
00:38:52,288 --> 00:38:55,290
This is the first time I've felt good
in three weeks or so.
662
00:38:55,375 --> 00:38:58,043
You need to get back on that board
is what you need to do.
663
00:38:58,128 --> 00:39:00,004
- Yeah?
- Hey, here's the deal.
664
00:39:00,088 --> 00:39:01,547
When life gives you lemons,
665
00:39:01,631 --> 00:39:03,882
just say, "Fuck the lemons," and bail.
666
00:39:03,967 --> 00:39:06,677
Yeah. No. You said it, totally.
667
00:39:06,761 --> 00:39:08,846
You gotta just pull yourself up
by your wetsuit,
668
00:39:08,930 --> 00:39:09,972
get back on that board...
669
00:39:09,973 --> 00:39:11,857
Hey, look, man,
if you're attacked by a shark,
670
00:39:11,858 --> 00:39:13,258
are you gonna give up surfing?
671
00:39:13,309 --> 00:39:15,019
Probably, yeah.
672
00:39:15,103 --> 00:39:17,855
Let's go in, all right. Tacos are on me.
673
00:39:18,565 --> 00:39:20,941
Can you try to listen
to what I'm saying to you, Brian?
674
00:39:21,026 --> 00:39:23,569
I'm confused and I don't know what to do.
675
00:39:23,653 --> 00:39:24,987
What's up with that hat?
676
00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:27,740
What are you
in the Buena Vista Social Club?
677
00:39:27,824 --> 00:39:29,033
This is a nice hat.
678
00:39:29,117 --> 00:39:31,869
What member of the Brat Pack are you?
679
00:39:31,953 --> 00:39:34,955
You look like one of those guys
suspected of killing JFK.
680
00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:37,332
That's very funny. That's great.
681
00:39:37,417 --> 00:39:39,418
LlZ: Tell him to make friends.
682
00:39:39,711 --> 00:39:42,087
You need to get out there
and make some friends, man.
683
00:39:42,172 --> 00:39:43,756
Is Liz there right now?
684
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,008
No, no, she's not in here, buddy.
685
00:39:46,092 --> 00:39:47,217
I just heard her.
686
00:39:47,302 --> 00:39:48,719
She's gone.
687
00:39:49,262 --> 00:39:51,221
Who are you looking at?
688
00:39:51,431 --> 00:39:52,473
What?
689
00:39:52,557 --> 00:39:54,266
Is she still... Hi, Liz.
690
00:39:54,350 --> 00:39:58,187
No. l swear on my mother's grave, it...
Okay, it was Liz.
691
00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:00,522
She wasn't here the entire time.
692
00:40:00,607 --> 00:40:02,775
Go out and meet people.
We meet people all the time...
693
00:40:02,776 --> 00:40:04,576
- All the time on vacation.
- Constantly.
694
00:40:04,580 --> 00:40:07,482
I've tried, all right,
there's a couple of dudes here,
695
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:09,698
but they're kind of weird.
696
00:40:09,991 --> 00:40:11,867
Just be friendly.
697
00:40:11,951 --> 00:40:13,118
lron your shirt.
698
00:40:13,203 --> 00:40:14,620
lron your shirt, look sharp.
699
00:40:14,704 --> 00:40:16,413
Even your T-shirts.
700
00:40:16,873 --> 00:40:19,500
There is this girl at the front desk
who's pretty cute.
701
00:40:20,126 --> 00:40:23,045
Oh, yeah. You know what?
Go have another dirty one night stand.
702
00:40:23,129 --> 00:40:24,922
That worked out so well before.
703
00:40:25,006 --> 00:40:27,925
What do you want from me?
You just told me I need to meet people.
704
00:40:28,009 --> 00:40:30,352
Ask her out.
Maybe that's what he needs, is a rebound.
705
00:40:30,353 --> 00:40:32,770
BRlAN: He's had plenty of chances
for rebounds. This isn't...
706
00:40:32,771 --> 00:40:34,338
LlZ: Can we get on the same team here?
707
00:40:34,339 --> 00:40:37,724
Okay, l'm sorry.
We're on the same team. Sorry.
708
00:40:38,228 --> 00:40:39,978
LlZ: You should go on a
date with this girl.
709
00:40:40,063 --> 00:40:41,438
Well, maybe I'll ask her out then.
710
00:40:41,523 --> 00:40:43,440
- Yes.
- My wife says so.
711
00:40:43,817 --> 00:40:46,693
- Hey, l'm in Hawaii, too!
- LlZ: Oh, that's neat.
712
00:40:47,028 --> 00:40:48,904
Aloha, bitches!
713
00:40:49,864 --> 00:40:51,448
That's very cool.
714
00:40:54,702 --> 00:40:57,204
They're not Native Americans, Brian.
715
00:40:59,582 --> 00:41:00,833
- Bri...
- What are you doing?
716
00:41:00,917 --> 00:41:02,960
- The luha. ls that right?
- Oh, yeah.
717
00:41:03,253 --> 00:41:04,461
It's called the hula.
718
00:41:04,546 --> 00:41:06,338
- Luau?
- No, hula.
719
00:41:06,422 --> 00:41:07,464
You're doing a luau?
720
00:41:22,021 --> 00:41:23,063
- Hey.
- Hey.
721
00:41:23,148 --> 00:41:24,398
- Peter.
- Wow.
722
00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:28,986
You look beautiful.
I mean, that's a beautiful dress.
723
00:41:29,070 --> 00:41:30,112
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
724
00:41:30,196 --> 00:41:31,572
This'll be fun.
725
00:41:31,656 --> 00:41:32,906
Lei?
726
00:41:37,495 --> 00:41:40,330
May I help you with something else, Peter?
727
00:41:40,382 --> 00:41:42,583
No, I'll just grab a drink.
I'm just gonna head inside.
728
00:41:42,667 --> 00:41:45,085
- Happy 4th of July!
- Thank you.
729
00:41:47,422 --> 00:41:48,463
Aloha!
730
00:42:02,228 --> 00:42:04,229
- You done here?
- No, actually, I just sat down,
731
00:42:04,230 --> 00:42:06,606
I'm just getting started.
It's delicious, though, thank you.
732
00:42:06,607 --> 00:42:08,350
I'll just go fuck myself.
733
00:42:08,401 --> 00:42:10,277
- Sorry, what?
- Mahalo.
734
00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:14,531
Hi, Peter.
735
00:42:16,284 --> 00:42:17,951
Hey. Hey, bro.
736
00:42:19,913 --> 00:42:21,413
- Hi.
- Hey, all right.
737
00:42:21,497 --> 00:42:23,373
Excuse me. Excuse me.
738
00:42:23,458 --> 00:42:26,585
Everybody, can I have your attention
for one second, please.
739
00:42:26,669 --> 00:42:29,588
We have a very special guest
with us here, today.
740
00:42:29,672 --> 00:42:33,967
He is the lead singer
of the band, Infant Sorrow,
741
00:42:34,636 --> 00:42:38,305
one of my favorite musicians of all time.
He's so awesome.
742
00:42:39,265 --> 00:42:41,475
Please, please, let's take...
743
00:42:41,976 --> 00:42:46,230
Let's see if we can get him up here,
Mr. Aldous Snow. Please, come on.
744
00:42:47,148 --> 00:42:48,273
Share your gift.
745
00:42:48,358 --> 00:42:49,650
Duty calls and all that.
746
00:42:49,734 --> 00:42:53,528
I'm trying to be incognito, it's weird.
It's like work to me, this is no fun.
747
00:42:53,613 --> 00:42:55,322
Hey! Thank you!
748
00:43:03,957 --> 00:43:06,458
ALDOUS: Thank you.
What a lovely introduction.
749
00:43:06,542 --> 00:43:09,002
What an eccentric and confident young man.
750
00:43:09,087 --> 00:43:12,631
I'd like to dedicate this song to a
very beautiful woman that's here today.
751
00:43:12,715 --> 00:43:15,467
It's Miss Sarah Marshall, there she is.
752
00:43:16,386 --> 00:43:17,594
Look at her, blimey!
753
00:43:26,020 --> 00:43:28,438
Old as ancient skies
754
00:43:28,690 --> 00:43:31,400
l've had these wandering eyes
755
00:43:32,193 --> 00:43:34,528
but you took me by surprise
756
00:43:34,612 --> 00:43:37,030
when you let me inside you
757
00:43:38,950 --> 00:43:43,495
lnside you
758
00:43:43,705 --> 00:43:45,205
This went from 6:00 to midnight.
759
00:43:45,290 --> 00:43:49,751
Teach me how to grow
while l'm moving inside of you
760
00:43:51,421 --> 00:43:53,297
lnside of you
761
00:43:54,173 --> 00:43:56,550
- lnside you
- lnside you
762
00:43:57,719 --> 00:44:00,554
l long to be, is it wrong to be
763
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:02,931
inside of you
764
00:44:03,850 --> 00:44:08,061
lnside of you the restless
find their dreams
765
00:44:10,148 --> 00:44:14,067
lnside of you this king has found his queen
766
00:44:20,700 --> 00:44:21,742
Hey.
767
00:44:21,826 --> 00:44:23,493
You're from the breakfast buffet, right?
768
00:44:23,578 --> 00:44:25,203
- Yeah.
- Whipped cream or berries?
769
00:44:25,288 --> 00:44:26,997
Yeah. Yeah, I'm Peter.
770
00:44:27,165 --> 00:44:28,248
- Kemo.
- Kemo.
771
00:44:28,333 --> 00:44:30,584
- Good to meet you, man.
- Good to meet, you, man.
772
00:44:30,668 --> 00:44:33,045
- Have a beer.
- Thanks. Thank you.
773
00:44:35,506 --> 00:44:36,965
Sarah Marshall.
774
00:44:37,050 --> 00:44:38,175
Yes.
775
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:41,803
How do you know
I was dating Sarah Marshall?
776
00:44:41,888 --> 00:44:44,389
Dwayne told me. Chuck told me.
777
00:44:45,141 --> 00:44:46,433
Even Rachel told me.
778
00:44:46,517 --> 00:44:50,562
I heard about it from everybody.
You gotta stop talking about it.
779
00:44:50,938 --> 00:44:53,106
It's like The Sopranos.
780
00:44:53,191 --> 00:44:54,524
It's over.
781
00:44:55,068 --> 00:44:56,777
Find a new show.
782
00:44:58,363 --> 00:44:59,905
You need a hug.
783
00:45:00,156 --> 00:45:01,698
Come here.
784
00:45:03,409 --> 00:45:04,951
Oh, thank you.
785
00:45:05,036 --> 00:45:06,787
You're awfully nice.
786
00:45:08,039 --> 00:45:10,707
I gotta go.
I'm prepping the pig for tomorrow's luau.
787
00:45:10,792 --> 00:45:13,627
You should come and help me.
It'll take your mind off of things.
788
00:45:13,711 --> 00:45:15,629
- Yeah? You don't mind?
- No.
789
00:45:16,130 --> 00:45:18,965
I mean, I must say I'm a pretty good cook.
790
00:45:19,300 --> 00:45:20,550
All right!
791
00:45:23,805 --> 00:45:26,473
I can't! Please don't make me do this!
792
00:45:26,641 --> 00:45:27,724
Do it!
793
00:45:27,809 --> 00:45:30,310
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
794
00:45:35,149 --> 00:45:36,733
KEMO: You can stop crying now.
795
00:45:36,818 --> 00:45:38,485
He's dead already.
796
00:45:38,986 --> 00:45:40,487
PETER: I'm not crying.
797
00:45:40,571 --> 00:45:41,905
You should stop crying.
798
00:45:41,989 --> 00:45:43,573
KEMO: I don't cry. I'm not a baby.
799
00:45:43,658 --> 00:45:46,618
PETER: Really?
'Cause you look like a gigantic baby.
800
00:45:46,828 --> 00:45:49,496
I'm sorry. I didn't mean that at all.
801
00:45:59,257 --> 00:46:00,507
Hey.
802
00:46:00,633 --> 00:46:02,986
Listen, would you like
to hang out tonight,
803
00:46:02,987 --> 00:46:05,178
like, not in an official
hotel function?
804
00:46:05,263 --> 00:46:06,496
Yeah. Totally.
805
00:46:06,497 --> 00:46:09,482
A bunch of us are going to go to this,
like, little beach thing afterwards.
806
00:46:09,483 --> 00:46:11,518
You're totally welcome to come.
807
00:46:12,186 --> 00:46:13,854
Maybe we could go together?
808
00:46:13,980 --> 00:46:15,522
Yeah, whatever.
809
00:46:15,540 --> 00:46:17,390
I mean we don't have to,
if you don't want to,
810
00:46:17,391 --> 00:46:18,533
I just thought that maybe...
811
00:46:18,534 --> 00:46:20,351
No, listen,
you don't have to make this weird.
812
00:46:20,386 --> 00:46:22,178
You either want to go or you don't.
813
00:46:23,322 --> 00:46:24,990
- I would love to.
- Okay.
814
00:46:25,533 --> 00:46:28,285
Awesome. Why don't you go upstairs,
change that shirt,
815
00:46:28,369 --> 00:46:31,204
and I'll meet you out front in, like, five?
816
00:46:41,215 --> 00:46:44,384
- This is so cool.
- You like it?
817
00:46:57,231 --> 00:46:59,649
So what brought you to Hawaii?
818
00:47:00,985 --> 00:47:03,236
- A dude.
- Of course.
819
00:47:03,362 --> 00:47:06,573
A surfer dude. You know, WCT, top 44.
820
00:47:09,869 --> 00:47:11,161
Totally.
821
00:47:12,872 --> 00:47:15,248
We were together for two years.
822
00:47:15,583 --> 00:47:18,251
Dropped out of school,
moved out here with him.
823
00:47:18,377 --> 00:47:20,504
Three weeks later,
I caught him cheating on me,
824
00:47:20,588 --> 00:47:22,923
so I moved out, and that's that.
825
00:47:23,925 --> 00:47:25,592
What an asshole.
826
00:47:26,427 --> 00:47:28,094
No, he's just a boy.
827
00:47:30,598 --> 00:47:34,518
You ever think about going back home,
finishing school, or...
828
00:47:35,728 --> 00:47:36,770
No.
829
00:47:37,522 --> 00:47:39,564
No. I work at the hotel,
830
00:47:40,525 --> 00:47:43,360
doesn't really have to
be a future in there.
831
00:47:44,612 --> 00:47:46,112
Okay, my turn.
832
00:47:46,531 --> 00:47:47,739
Okay.
833
00:47:48,449 --> 00:47:52,786
So, how do you like
writing music for a TV show?
834
00:47:55,623 --> 00:47:58,041
It's great, you know. People are great.
835
00:47:58,125 --> 00:48:01,127
It's great to have a steady paycheck.
It's... I'm very lucky.
836
00:48:01,254 --> 00:48:02,295
Oh, my God, you hate it.
837
00:48:02,421 --> 00:48:04,631
I fucking hate it so much.
838
00:48:04,966 --> 00:48:07,300
So then, do something about it.
839
00:48:10,972 --> 00:48:12,055
Excuse me.
840
00:48:12,139 --> 00:48:15,308
I'm just saying, if you hate something,
change it.
841
00:48:15,434 --> 00:48:17,102
- Don't dwell.
- Well, I'm trying.
842
00:48:19,146 --> 00:48:21,815
I'm actually working on a rock opera.
843
00:48:22,817 --> 00:48:24,317
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
844
00:48:25,611 --> 00:48:27,821
What's your rock opera about?
845
00:48:30,324 --> 00:48:31,658
Dracula.
846
00:48:32,994 --> 00:48:35,829
Yeah, and eternal love, you know.
That's the theme.
847
00:48:35,955 --> 00:48:39,416
But I think the two sort of
go hand in hand, you know?
848
00:48:39,834 --> 00:48:41,167
And I...
849
00:48:43,170 --> 00:48:46,256
I have this vision of
doing it with puppets.
850
00:48:49,010 --> 00:48:50,844
I mean, humans also, you know.
851
00:48:53,347 --> 00:48:54,681
Why Dracula?
852
00:48:54,807 --> 00:48:58,602
Because he's a man like anyone else.
He just wants to be loved.
853
00:48:58,686 --> 00:49:00,520
And every time he gets close
to a human woman,
854
00:49:00,605 --> 00:49:02,188
he ends up smothering and killing her,
855
00:49:02,315 --> 00:49:04,941
which is a feeling I am familiar with.
856
00:49:05,026 --> 00:49:06,943
What? That's just a joke.
857
00:49:07,028 --> 00:49:08,945
- Oh, shit.
- What?
858
00:49:09,697 --> 00:49:12,282
My ex. If I run, you run.
859
00:49:13,785 --> 00:49:16,119
- Do you understand?
- No, I don't understand at all.
860
00:49:16,203 --> 00:49:17,938
Fucking motherfucker! Dipshit!
861
00:49:17,964 --> 00:49:19,205
Rachel, what are you doing?
862
00:49:19,206 --> 00:49:21,073
I thought I told you
to stay back on your island.
863
00:49:21,074 --> 00:49:22,157
Take it easy, just take it easy.
864
00:49:22,158 --> 00:49:23,825
Yeah, you know what?
The deal was over April 9.
865
00:49:23,826 --> 00:49:25,436
Well, the deal's back on, motherfucker.
866
00:49:25,496 --> 00:49:27,814
You ain't the chief in this village.
I'm the chief.
867
00:49:27,840 --> 00:49:28,882
Of the idiots?
868
00:49:28,908 --> 00:49:31,776
Rachel, let me handle this. I know his friend.
Let me handle this, okay?
869
00:49:31,861 --> 00:49:33,345
Go ahead.
870
00:49:34,055 --> 00:49:36,139
Hey, man, you remember me from breakfast?
871
00:49:36,223 --> 00:49:38,933
- Oh, yeah, the cocktail guy, that's right.
- Yeah.
872
00:49:39,060 --> 00:49:42,145
This ain't the breakfast buffet.
What, you with my girl?
873
00:49:42,229 --> 00:49:44,397
Keeping her warm for me at night, huh?
874
00:49:44,523 --> 00:49:46,524
Hey, what are you doing here?
875
00:49:50,571 --> 00:49:52,030
RACHEL: That's right. Just hit him!
876
00:49:52,040 --> 00:49:53,732
Rachel, we gotta get out of here. Rachel?
877
00:49:53,733 --> 00:49:55,476
You get what you deserve.
878
00:50:07,588 --> 00:50:11,174
Just a boy?
No, that dude was a fucking man.
879
00:50:11,258 --> 00:50:15,220
No, no, no. He's an asshole.
I can't believe I ever dated him.
880
00:50:16,097 --> 00:50:17,931
- You went nuts.
- Yeah.
881
00:50:18,432 --> 00:50:20,975
You guys are dysfunctional.
882
00:50:21,477 --> 00:50:23,937
You were like one of those girls
from Flavor of Love.
883
00:50:24,063 --> 00:50:25,438
- From what?
- You were.
884
00:50:25,564 --> 00:50:27,440
"I'll kill you. I'll kill you."
885
00:50:28,776 --> 00:50:30,652
Okay, I'm gonna go get us another round.
886
00:50:30,778 --> 00:50:32,737
I'll grab it. It's no big deal.
887
00:50:32,822 --> 00:50:36,449
You don't have to dote on me.
I'm not that type of girl.
888
00:50:49,296 --> 00:50:50,880
You look so hot.
889
00:50:50,965 --> 00:50:53,299
Give me Crime Scene.
Give me dirty Crime Scene girl.
890
00:50:53,426 --> 00:50:55,552
André the Giant, out of the shot, please.
891
00:50:55,636 --> 00:50:57,679
Mutombo, out of the shot, come on.
892
00:51:26,125 --> 00:51:29,419
Did you know that there's a picture
of you flashing,
893
00:51:29,503 --> 00:51:31,045
hanging in the men's room?
894
00:51:31,172 --> 00:51:34,132
Yeah. I hate it so much.
895
00:51:34,216 --> 00:51:36,843
My jackass boyfriend made me do it.
896
00:51:37,386 --> 00:51:39,345
Keoki took it, right there.
897
00:51:39,472 --> 00:51:41,556
And I asked him to take it down,
898
00:51:41,682 --> 00:51:45,059
but he said that it would ruin
the balance of the collage.
899
00:51:45,661 --> 00:51:47,829
Do you want me to try
to get it down for you?
900
00:51:47,855 --> 00:51:51,224
No. No, no, no, he'll kill you.
Like, really kill you.
901
00:51:53,486 --> 00:51:55,862
But I have a surprise for you.
902
00:51:56,363 --> 00:51:57,414
Really, what?
903
00:51:57,498 --> 00:51:58,990
MAN: We're gonna take a quick break.
904
00:51:59,074 --> 00:52:01,117
Tonight we have a special guest
from the mainland,
905
00:52:01,202 --> 00:52:04,078
singing a song from his Dracula musical,
906
00:52:04,371 --> 00:52:07,373
please welcome to the stage,
Mr. Peter Bretter.
907
00:52:09,251 --> 00:52:10,418
Peter!
908
00:52:10,544 --> 00:52:12,170
Yeah! Go get them, tiger!
909
00:52:12,254 --> 00:52:13,296
Please don't.
910
00:52:14,548 --> 00:52:15,882
Peter!
911
00:52:16,091 --> 00:52:18,593
- Rachel...
- Dracula! Peter!
912
00:52:23,933 --> 00:52:25,266
Get them!
913
00:52:25,392 --> 00:52:26,434
What's up?
914
00:52:33,067 --> 00:52:34,442
Thank you.
915
00:52:36,938 --> 00:52:38,496
You know, I could play something else.
916
00:52:38,581 --> 00:52:40,381
I just think out of
context this might be...
917
00:52:40,407 --> 00:52:42,075
RACHEL: Dracula musical!
918
00:52:43,953 --> 00:52:45,411
Thank you.
919
00:53:05,558 --> 00:53:10,103
lt's getting kind ofhard to
believe
things are going to get better
920
00:53:12,314 --> 00:53:18,152
l've been drowning too long to believe
that the tide's going to turn
921
00:53:19,822 --> 00:53:24,993
And l've been living too hard to believe
things are going to get easier now
922
00:53:27,162 --> 00:53:31,791
l'm still trying to shake off the pain
from the lessons l've learned
923
00:53:34,336 --> 00:53:39,132
And if l see Van Helsing, l swear
to the lord l will slay him
924
00:53:41,510 --> 00:53:45,763
Take it from me, but l swear
l won't let it be so
925
00:53:48,142 --> 00:53:53,146
Blood will run down his face
when he is decapitated
926
00:53:54,523 --> 00:53:58,484
His head on my mantle
is how l will let this one know
927
00:53:59,904 --> 00:54:01,696
How much l love you
928
00:54:09,371 --> 00:54:14,709
Die
929
00:54:19,214 --> 00:54:20,423
l can't
930
00:54:32,019 --> 00:54:33,353
RACHEL: Awesome!
931
00:54:33,896 --> 00:54:35,355
PETER: Thank you.
932
00:54:39,234 --> 00:54:40,360
Thank you.
933
00:54:40,611 --> 00:54:43,655
So, I had a really, really
great time tonight.
934
00:54:43,739 --> 00:54:45,949
- Yeah?
- Yeah. I mean, it got a little wild.
935
00:54:46,033 --> 00:54:47,951
- "A little"? You can say that.
- Yeah.
936
00:54:48,035 --> 00:54:50,787
But it was really fun,
and you're so cool, and it was...
937
00:54:50,871 --> 00:54:52,580
Thank you for taking me out.
938
00:54:52,706 --> 00:54:54,916
No, I had a great time. Thank you.
939
00:54:55,125 --> 00:54:56,793
- You did?
- Yeah.
940
00:55:01,799 --> 00:55:03,925
I'm sorry.
941
00:55:04,051 --> 00:55:08,179
I'm sorry, I just... I don't...
I just don't wanna complicate things.
942
00:55:08,263 --> 00:55:09,681
- No, of course!
- Yeah?
943
00:55:09,765 --> 00:55:12,934
No, no, no. Totally. I totally get that.
944
00:55:13,060 --> 00:55:15,186
- I had a great time.
- A handshake?
945
00:55:15,270 --> 00:55:18,481
- Well, I don't know. Okay.
- All right, all right.
946
00:55:18,565 --> 00:55:21,234
- All right. Get home safe.
- You, too.
947
00:55:24,321 --> 00:55:26,322
- Thanks again.
- Bye.
948
00:55:33,580 --> 00:55:37,250
l'm on a hammock with me lady
949
00:55:37,334 --> 00:55:40,753
Watching the sea roll by
950
00:55:42,965 --> 00:55:45,633
Things have been great now
951
00:55:45,759 --> 00:55:49,012
'Cause we're in Hawaii
952
00:55:50,848 --> 00:55:52,348
Hey, guys.
953
00:55:53,434 --> 00:55:55,685
Hey, man. I'm Koonu.
954
00:55:56,437 --> 00:55:59,689
Yeah. No, I remember. I'm Peter.
We took a surf lesson together.
955
00:55:59,773 --> 00:56:03,276
Yeah, you're that guy
that works with Kaiser Permanente.
956
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:06,904
No, I'm Peter.
We had a nice talk out on the water.
957
00:56:06,989 --> 00:56:08,489
That's cool.
958
00:56:10,659 --> 00:56:12,618
Okay, can I just say something?
959
00:56:12,703 --> 00:56:16,205
- I went on a date tonight with Rachel, right?
- That wasn't a date.
960
00:56:16,290 --> 00:56:18,249
She's in customer service, dude.
961
00:56:18,333 --> 00:56:20,418
She took you out for charity.
962
00:56:20,502 --> 00:56:24,797
It was a date, okay? Trust me.
I know a date, and that was a date.
963
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:27,258
I bet you think strippers like you, too.
964
00:56:27,393 --> 00:56:29,152
- That's really not necessary.
- It's true.
965
00:56:29,153 --> 00:56:32,238
Don't waste your time, man.
Believe me, it is a nowhere road. I know.
966
00:56:32,306 --> 00:56:35,266
Did you see her ex-boyfriend?
He is ridiculous.
967
00:56:35,350 --> 00:56:37,602
Who, Greg? I love Greg, man.
968
00:56:37,686 --> 00:56:40,438
I saw him beat up a guy with a starfish.
969
00:56:40,522 --> 00:56:43,566
- Okay, that's just ridiculous.
- That guy was me.
970
00:56:43,650 --> 00:56:46,569
Dude, my homie over here,
on his honeymoon?
971
00:56:46,653 --> 00:56:49,238
Getting as much sex
as he possibly can ever have.
972
00:56:49,323 --> 00:56:51,074
Are you giving to her
hard and rough, dude?
973
00:56:51,158 --> 00:56:52,700
Come on.
974
00:56:53,994 --> 00:56:59,916
The wife wants me to do certain things
that I find inappropriate.
975
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,877
Let me just say
that if God was a city planner,
976
00:57:03,003 --> 00:57:06,839
he would not put a playground
next to a sewage system.
977
00:57:09,051 --> 00:57:13,096
We're trying to fuck,
but we're not having fun fucking.
978
00:57:13,180 --> 00:57:17,141
We're just, like...
I'm stabbing her private parts,
979
00:57:17,226 --> 00:57:21,187
and it's not fun, and it causes anxiety.
Fucking is...
980
00:57:23,398 --> 00:57:24,982
And then when you're not fucking...
981
00:57:25,067 --> 00:57:27,777
- Hey, someone's gotta stop him.
- You're the butt of a joke.
982
00:57:27,861 --> 00:57:30,363
Fucking this ring is...
983
00:57:30,447 --> 00:57:32,073
Fuck!
984
00:57:32,199 --> 00:57:34,283
It's gonna be all right.
985
00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:37,286
Hi.
986
00:57:38,789 --> 00:57:41,249
Hi, do you wanna come back to bed?
987
00:57:41,375 --> 00:57:42,583
Sure.
988
00:57:45,546 --> 00:57:46,879
Have fun.
989
00:57:48,382 --> 00:57:52,718
I like her hair.
I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.
990
00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:02,311
Julian, what's up?
991
00:58:04,648 --> 00:58:05,731
Oh.
992
00:58:06,733 --> 00:58:07,984
God.
993
00:58:18,162 --> 00:58:19,996
The show's been canceled.
994
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:21,956
That's good, 'cause that's what you wanted.
995
00:58:22,082 --> 00:58:24,542
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
996
00:58:25,836 --> 00:58:31,007
It's just... I guess
I thought we had another year left.
997
00:58:31,091 --> 00:58:33,259
It seems like we did, and...
This'll be good,
998
00:58:33,343 --> 00:58:36,512
'cause it's been a long-awaited transition
into film for me.
999
00:58:36,597 --> 00:58:39,891
Don't get me wrong, but it's just...
It's a surprise.
1000
00:58:39,975 --> 00:58:41,642
Come on tour with me.
1001
00:58:41,727 --> 00:58:46,522
I'll serenade you every night
in front of thousands of women.
1002
00:58:46,607 --> 00:58:48,357
I didn't know you were going on tour.
1003
00:58:48,442 --> 00:58:49,692
Yeah, I'm going in two weeks.
1004
00:58:49,776 --> 00:58:53,821
It's like an 1 8-month tour,
43 countries, Infant Sorrow,
1005
00:58:53,906 --> 00:58:56,032
and it's gonna be a massive tour.
1006
00:58:56,116 --> 00:59:01,245
Yeah. I can't come 'cause I have a job.
I'm a working actress.
1007
00:59:01,330 --> 00:59:03,080
Not anymore.
1008
00:59:03,165 --> 00:59:05,666
You're an unemployed actress, perfect.
1009
00:59:05,751 --> 00:59:09,462
You could be the queen of the groupies,
queen of the Sorrow Suckers.
1010
00:59:10,255 --> 00:59:11,964
The Sorrow Suckers.
1011
00:59:13,008 --> 00:59:16,510
Sorrow Suckers.
I don't know why they call them that.
1012
00:59:16,595 --> 00:59:19,805
Mr. and Mrs. Snow, sorry.
Sorry to bother you.
1013
00:59:19,973 --> 00:59:23,017
The hotel wanted to offer you
some complimentary coconut cake.
1014
00:59:23,352 --> 00:59:27,396
It's from the hotel. It's definitely
not from me personally, so...
1015
00:59:28,607 --> 00:59:30,775
- Yeah, thanks.
- Okay, great.
1016
00:59:30,859 --> 00:59:34,195
When were you planning on telling me this?
1017
00:59:34,279 --> 00:59:37,907
- I just told you, then.
- Yeah. No, I know.
1018
00:59:37,991 --> 00:59:42,787
But telling me now
isn't really the same as telling me.
1019
00:59:42,871 --> 00:59:45,623
Well, look, you know,
I've not told you I've got genital herpes,
1020
00:59:45,707 --> 00:59:48,084
because it's not inflamed at the moment.
1021
00:59:48,168 --> 00:59:50,069
Do you guys want some champagne
with your cake,
1022
00:59:50,154 --> 00:59:51,629
or do you want it without your cake?
1023
00:59:51,713 --> 00:59:53,297
I don't drink.
1024
01:00:00,764 --> 01:00:05,142
All right, so I came here
to give you my demo. I just...
1025
01:00:05,227 --> 01:00:07,603
I worship you,
and I just wanted to give you my demo.
1026
01:00:07,688 --> 01:00:09,814
Just take a listen and...
1027
01:00:10,983 --> 01:00:12,441
Okay.
1028
01:00:13,151 --> 01:00:15,695
'Cause you know what?
You don't wanna be the guy sitting there,
1029
01:00:15,779 --> 01:00:18,489
watching BBC, and saying,
1030
01:00:18,573 --> 01:00:22,201
"Oh, I saw that guy! He was my waiter,
1031
01:00:22,286 --> 01:00:26,247
"and I totally dismissed him
like everyone else does in his life.
1032
01:00:26,331 --> 01:00:28,165
"And I totally was wrong,
1033
01:00:28,250 --> 01:00:31,752
"because he's a major, major,
major influence on me now,
1034
01:00:31,837 --> 01:00:33,838
"and I feel terrible!"
1035
01:00:37,175 --> 01:00:39,969
That stupid English voice, was that me?
1036
01:00:41,513 --> 01:00:43,264
Unfortunately, yes.
1037
01:00:44,516 --> 01:00:47,351
You're really gonna like it.
1038
01:00:47,436 --> 01:00:50,313
I'll listen to it when you've gone.
1039
01:00:56,361 --> 01:00:59,238
Hey, look, just don't
tell anyone at the hotel.
1040
01:01:08,373 --> 01:01:10,541
- What's up, dude?
- What's up?
1041
01:01:10,625 --> 01:01:15,212
Peter, I got some really interesting news
this morning.
1042
01:01:15,422 --> 01:01:17,340
Aldous gave you gonorrhea?
1043
01:01:17,424 --> 01:01:20,468
No. Why would I tell you that?
1044
01:01:20,552 --> 01:01:23,054
Crime Scene was canceled.
1045
01:01:23,138 --> 01:01:24,180
Whoa.
1046
01:01:25,223 --> 01:01:26,307
Wow.
1047
01:01:29,227 --> 01:01:32,063
- You all right?
- Yeah. Yeah.
1048
01:01:33,482 --> 01:01:35,816
I mean, I've been waiting
to take the next step,
1049
01:01:35,901 --> 01:01:38,736
you know, into features for a long time,
so it's a really good thing.
1050
01:01:38,820 --> 01:01:43,741
This isn't The View. I mean, we can have
an honest talk about this if we want.
1051
01:01:45,410 --> 01:01:48,371
I don't wanna step out of the spotlight
and then be forgotten.
1052
01:01:48,455 --> 01:01:51,040
I don't wanna disappear. I'm freaked out.
1053
01:01:51,124 --> 01:01:53,709
I wanna be honest.
I'm really freaked out right now, okay?
1054
01:01:53,794 --> 01:01:57,797
Because, seemingly, the only actresses
that actually can survive
1055
01:01:57,881 --> 01:02:00,925
are the ones that show their cooter,
and, excuse me, but I refuse to do that.
1056
01:02:01,009 --> 01:02:02,218
I have a little dignity.
1057
01:02:02,302 --> 01:02:05,346
And I don't have the frame to support
plastic surgery. I would tip over.
1058
01:02:05,430 --> 01:02:07,765
And I'm not gonna do that.
I'm not gonna exploit myself.
1059
01:02:07,849 --> 01:02:12,269
Listen, you're gonna be fine.
You have a long career ahead of you.
1060
01:02:12,354 --> 01:02:15,940
You've got, like, four
years until you're 30.
1061
01:02:16,024 --> 01:02:17,817
It's gonna be fine.
1062
01:02:21,738 --> 01:02:24,198
- How are you?
- I'm screwed.
1063
01:02:24,282 --> 01:02:29,745
Frankly, I don't stand a chance.
No, I'll be fine.
1064
01:02:29,830 --> 01:02:33,457
I've been quietly stealing money
from you for a long time.
1065
01:02:34,793 --> 01:02:38,379
You're always good at cheering me up,
Pete, thank you.
1066
01:02:41,633 --> 01:02:43,300
Die
1067
01:02:43,802 --> 01:02:47,388
Die
1068
01:02:50,183 --> 01:02:51,934
l can't
1069
01:02:55,647 --> 01:02:58,899
It's really good, Peter.
I just don't understand it. I don't.
1070
01:02:58,984 --> 01:03:02,236
I mean, just chalk it up to that. Please
don't play it again, 'cause I don't...
1071
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:04,488
Just listen to it one more time and see...
1072
01:03:07,159 --> 01:03:08,868
Where's Aldous?
1073
01:03:09,286 --> 01:03:12,121
- Mr. Snow, may I ask you a question?
- Okay.
1074
01:03:12,205 --> 01:03:14,907
I want to please my wife here,
on our honeymoon,
1075
01:03:14,908 --> 01:03:16,516
but I don't know what I'm doing.
1076
01:03:16,585 --> 01:03:18,127
You having difficulty sex-wise?
1077
01:03:18,211 --> 01:03:20,463
- Do you not know how to use this?
- I know how.
1078
01:03:20,547 --> 01:03:23,257
- Have you had sex before?
- We can't.
1079
01:03:23,341 --> 01:03:24,800
- Why?
- Our religion.
1080
01:03:24,885 --> 01:03:26,385
Right, 'cause of God and everything?
1081
01:03:26,470 --> 01:03:27,936
Hey, that's not gonna be a problem,
1082
01:03:28,021 --> 01:03:29,972
because God should be present
in the bedroom.
1083
01:03:30,056 --> 01:03:32,558
Just tell me specifically
what I need to do.
1084
01:03:32,642 --> 01:03:35,519
You need to penetrate deeply
and stimulate the clitoris simultaneously.
1085
01:03:35,520 --> 01:03:37,512
That's what you gotta do.
That's what it's about.
1086
01:03:37,513 --> 01:03:40,941
If you can involve the anus in that,
then that's absolute perfection. - Got it.
1087
01:03:41,026 --> 01:03:43,277
Explore her ears.
1088
01:03:43,361 --> 01:03:46,739
Find it in you to be a little more circly.
1089
01:03:46,823 --> 01:03:47,907
You are a man.
1090
01:03:47,991 --> 01:03:49,200
God's within you.
1091
01:03:49,284 --> 01:03:50,659
I actually feel okay about it.
1092
01:03:50,744 --> 01:03:53,762
You know, I'm a little scared,
but I'll be all right. I'll get anotherjob.
1093
01:03:53,847 --> 01:03:56,290
That's interesting, man.
You know what else is interesting?
1094
01:03:56,374 --> 01:03:59,210
- What?
- Me on the moon.
1095
01:03:59,294 --> 01:04:01,545
I just wanna talk to you about something.
Can you stop?
1096
01:04:01,630 --> 01:04:03,714
- All right, I'm just gonna talk, and then...
- Air!
1097
01:04:03,798 --> 01:04:06,258
There was this interesting moment
with Sarah.
1098
01:04:06,343 --> 01:04:09,720
Whoa, what? l don't wanna hear about
your interesting moment with Sarah, Pete.
1099
01:04:09,804 --> 01:04:11,630
Then who am I supposed to talk to
about this?
1100
01:04:11,631 --> 01:04:15,200
Well, not me, because have l ever had an
interesting moment with an ex-girlfriend?
1101
01:04:15,268 --> 01:04:17,770
- Do you have an ex-girlfriend? No!
- No.
1102
01:04:17,854 --> 01:04:19,146
LlZ: No.
1103
01:04:20,190 --> 01:04:23,400
I would really love to get
the woman's perspective on the matter.
1104
01:04:23,485 --> 01:04:24,985
- Really?
- No.
1105
01:04:25,070 --> 01:04:26,779
But come on in and just sit down.
1106
01:04:26,863 --> 01:04:29,490
- Stay. You have to...
- Honey, no, no, the camera's right there.
1107
01:04:29,500 --> 01:04:31,325
No, l know,
but l just wanna tell him, though.
1108
01:04:31,326 --> 01:04:33,678
- No, the camera...
- Think about how much she's hurt you.
1109
01:04:33,720 --> 01:04:34,662
- Hey, Liz?
- Yeah?
1110
01:04:34,746 --> 01:04:37,422
I think you need to move just a tiny bit
further away from the microphone.
1111
01:04:37,423 --> 01:04:38,265
- Just...
- No, closer.
1112
01:04:38,333 --> 01:04:39,416
- Now a little further.
- Okay.
1113
01:04:39,501 --> 01:04:40,543
- Closer.
- And then...
1114
01:04:40,544 --> 01:04:42,453
- And then a little further, and then closer.
- l don't know.
1115
01:04:42,453 --> 01:04:44,145
- Keep your head down, though.
- l'm bad at this thing.
1116
01:04:44,146 --> 01:04:46,364
- Can you hear me?
- Yeah, closer. Further away.
1117
01:04:46,424 --> 01:04:49,301
l know what you're doing.
That's not funny at all.
1118
01:04:49,386 --> 01:04:51,512
- You stop that.
- What?
1119
01:04:51,638 --> 01:04:53,889
- What's he doing?
- Come on. Yeah, yeah, real funny.
1120
01:04:54,057 --> 01:04:55,516
Hey, that's a great necklace, Liz.
1121
01:04:55,642 --> 01:04:57,643
- Did you have that a second ago?
- Thank you!
1122
01:04:58,895 --> 01:05:00,854
That's gross!
1123
01:05:00,939 --> 01:05:02,273
- LlZ: l don't get it.
- Stop it.
1124
01:05:02,357 --> 01:05:06,026
- He's saying if l were to sperm on you...
- What?
1125
01:05:06,111 --> 01:05:09,113
- ...it would be a pearl necklace.
- Why?
1126
01:05:09,197 --> 01:05:11,115
- Real funny.
- Sorry.
1127
01:05:13,034 --> 01:05:14,577
Hey, Dracula!
1128
01:05:14,661 --> 01:05:18,914
"And when I see Van Helsing,
I swear to the Lord, I'll slay him."
1129
01:05:21,042 --> 01:05:23,419
That shit is funny, dude!
1130
01:05:23,503 --> 01:05:25,004
Hey, Pete.
1131
01:05:25,088 --> 01:05:28,082
So I was gonna go over
to Lazy Joe's later tonight,
1132
01:05:28,166 --> 01:05:30,726
and I wanted to see
if you wanted to come and join.
1133
01:05:31,386 --> 01:05:34,096
I think I'm confused,
because I thought last night...
1134
01:05:34,180 --> 01:05:37,975
Oh, my God. Dude, get out of your head.
It's really nice out here.
1135
01:05:38,059 --> 01:05:40,469
Yeah, I bet it is.
1136
01:05:40,554 --> 01:05:41,837
All right, yeah. You know what?
1137
01:05:41,838 --> 01:05:43,555
I could totally use a
friendly hangout, so...
1138
01:05:43,556 --> 01:05:44,598
All right.
1139
01:05:44,600 --> 01:05:46,459
I don't know if you want,
instead of Lazy Joe's,
1140
01:05:46,560 --> 01:05:48,320
I was thinking of going
to Laie Point right now.
1141
01:05:48,321 --> 01:05:49,571
- Really?
- Yeah.
1142
01:05:49,571 --> 01:05:51,989
I heard that place was a pain in the ass.
1143
01:05:53,074 --> 01:05:54,283
RACHEL: Okay.
1144
01:05:55,135 --> 01:05:56,644
- Hey!
- DWAYNE: Yo, what's up, guys?
1145
01:05:56,645 --> 01:05:58,070
PETER: We're just going for a hike.
1146
01:05:58,071 --> 01:06:00,739
No, you're not, you're going snorkeling.
1147
01:06:00,740 --> 01:06:02,416
PETER: I think we're gonna go on a hike.
1148
01:06:02,450 --> 01:06:05,419
It is sea turtle fucking season, dude.
Let's go.
1149
01:06:05,503 --> 01:06:08,039
They fuck for three hours, dude.
I mean, that's magical.
1150
01:06:08,040 --> 01:06:10,775
- No, we're going on a hike.
- I think we'll go on a hike, yeah.
1151
01:06:10,842 --> 01:06:12,676
What? Your loss.
1152
01:06:13,928 --> 01:06:15,888
Why won't anybody
go snorkeling with me?
1153
01:06:22,020 --> 01:06:24,229
How you doing back there?
1154
01:06:25,231 --> 01:06:26,607
Awesome.
1155
01:06:26,691 --> 01:06:29,985
I don't think I've ever been
this covered in sweat before.
1156
01:06:30,070 --> 01:06:32,112
It's like I have some sort of fever.
1157
01:06:32,197 --> 01:06:36,450
I told you this was a pain in the ass.
Could've been at Lazy Joe's.
1158
01:06:36,534 --> 01:06:38,118
- Oh, yeah.
- Uh-huh.
1159
01:06:38,203 --> 01:06:39,912
Oh, shit.
1160
01:06:39,996 --> 01:06:41,705
- You good?
- No.
1161
01:06:44,834 --> 01:06:47,419
PETER: Wow, we're really going
up to the edge of this, huh?
1162
01:06:47,504 --> 01:06:48,837
Look!
1163
01:06:52,967 --> 01:06:55,969
Wow, this is really beautiful.
1164
01:06:58,515 --> 01:07:03,102
All right, so now that your show's done,
are you gonna finish the Dracula musical?
1165
01:07:03,186 --> 01:07:05,354
It's not that easy, you know.
1166
01:07:06,439 --> 01:07:09,066
Sarah always thought it was crazy, and...
1167
01:07:09,150 --> 01:07:13,904
Well, you're definitely crazy.
But so is everyone, right? So who cares?
1168
01:07:13,988 --> 01:07:17,408
- I just don't feel like doing anything.
- Why?
1169
01:07:17,492 --> 01:07:18,701
'Cause my heart is broken,
1170
01:07:18,785 --> 01:07:21,578
and I can't imagine
doing anything right now.
1171
01:07:21,663 --> 01:07:25,624
It's probably the same reason
you don't go back to school, you know?
1172
01:07:29,129 --> 01:07:31,922
Maybe it's good we got hurt like that,
you know?
1173
01:07:32,006 --> 01:07:37,261
I don't know about you,
but it makes me feel impervious to pain.
1174
01:07:37,345 --> 01:07:40,931
Yeah. Kind of like
there's nothing left to be afraid of.
1175
01:07:41,015 --> 01:07:43,642
- Yeah. No, exactly.
- Right.
1176
01:07:43,727 --> 01:07:47,980
We could leap off this rock,
and it won't hurt us as bad as they did.
1177
01:07:50,150 --> 01:07:52,025
So jump, then.
1178
01:07:52,110 --> 01:07:54,445
No, I meant that,
like, as a metaphor, you know?
1179
01:07:54,529 --> 01:07:56,572
No. Just do it.
1180
01:07:59,534 --> 01:08:02,327
You'll be fine. Jump.
1181
01:08:08,168 --> 01:08:10,085
What the hell?
1182
01:08:12,088 --> 01:08:15,132
Oh, God! Oh, God. I made her kill herself!
1183
01:08:20,597 --> 01:08:22,306
You must be crazy!
1184
01:08:22,390 --> 01:08:25,309
- So are you gonna jump or what?
- No!
1185
01:08:25,393 --> 01:08:28,854
Come on, Peter!
I can see your vagina from here!
1186
01:08:28,938 --> 01:08:31,648
I can see your hoo-ha.
1187
01:08:31,733 --> 01:08:34,067
I mean, I'll jump!
1188
01:08:34,152 --> 01:08:36,195
Chicken! Come on!
1189
01:08:52,545 --> 01:08:56,006
Please, God, don't let me die today.
1190
01:08:57,634 --> 01:08:59,510
- I'm okay!
- Okay!
1191
01:08:59,594 --> 01:09:02,471
- I'll just let go, right?
- No, no, no!
1192
01:09:02,555 --> 01:09:06,892
If you fall straight down, you'd
probably hit a rock and kill yourself!
1193
01:09:07,977 --> 01:09:09,895
- Totally.
- Yeah.
1194
01:09:09,979 --> 01:09:11,146
So what do I do?
1195
01:09:11,231 --> 01:09:13,982
Why don't you press your feet
up against the rock,
1196
01:09:14,067 --> 01:09:15,868
and, like, shoot yourself off!
1197
01:09:15,870 --> 01:09:18,138
- What, like a frog?
- I don't know, Peter!
1198
01:09:18,204 --> 01:09:20,431
Just get off the fucking rock!
1199
01:09:20,615 --> 01:09:22,950
- Here I go!
- Okay!
1200
01:09:23,034 --> 01:09:24,326
One!
1201
01:09:26,120 --> 01:09:29,206
Two!
1202
01:09:31,918 --> 01:09:34,127
- Two and a half!
- Jump!
1203
01:09:34,212 --> 01:09:35,629
Three!
1204
01:09:49,060 --> 01:09:52,029
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1205
01:09:52,114 --> 01:09:54,606
- You saw that, right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw it!
1206
01:09:54,691 --> 01:09:57,109
I was there. I witnessed it.
1207
01:09:57,193 --> 01:09:58,610
Thanks.
1208
01:10:05,243 --> 01:10:06,743
Come on.
1209
01:10:14,460 --> 01:10:17,462
You've got Christ between your thighs,
1210
01:10:18,715 --> 01:10:20,799
but with a shorter beard.
1211
01:10:21,259 --> 01:10:23,969
- Mahalo.
- Aloha.
1212
01:10:24,345 --> 01:10:26,763
- Sex!
- I'm cramping, I'm cramping.
1213
01:10:26,848 --> 01:10:28,557
- Okay.
- Okay, okay.
1214
01:10:30,685 --> 01:10:33,145
Petey? Petey?
1215
01:10:36,941 --> 01:10:39,693
Sorry. I knocked a bunch.
1216
01:10:39,777 --> 01:10:42,654
You were really out.
Ken sent me.
1217
01:10:42,780 --> 01:10:45,949
Dakota Fanning and her people,
they need this room.
1218
01:10:46,034 --> 01:10:47,743
She loves it here.
1219
01:10:48,620 --> 01:10:49,661
Oh.
1220
01:10:50,455 --> 01:10:52,789
So does that mean I have
to leave the hotel?
1221
01:10:52,874 --> 01:10:54,666
Ken found you a room.
1222
01:10:54,751 --> 01:10:58,670
I'll take it, yeah.
I wanna hang out with Rachel a little more.
1223
01:10:59,672 --> 01:11:03,091
Are those sad tissues or happy tissues?
1224
01:11:06,763 --> 01:11:09,181
Maybe you should just give me a minute.
1225
01:11:12,685 --> 01:11:15,687
It was the only room available!
1226
01:11:15,772 --> 01:11:17,522
I'm sure it was!
1227
01:11:21,235 --> 01:11:23,695
- Hey, how's it going?
- It's all right.
1228
01:11:23,780 --> 01:11:25,197
Really?
1229
01:11:25,281 --> 01:11:28,342
I think you got some pain behind
those eyes. A kind of pain that only...
1230
01:11:28,426 --> 01:11:30,494
Okay, you know what?
Let's cut the bullshit.
1231
01:11:30,578 --> 01:11:32,704
I wanna stand up on a wave before I leave.
1232
01:11:32,789 --> 01:11:34,623
I don't think you're ready yet, man.
1233
01:11:34,707 --> 01:11:38,293
- I'm ready to ride giants, Koonu.
- I think you're ready.
1234
01:12:00,817 --> 01:12:02,192
Petey!
1235
01:12:07,281 --> 01:12:08,323
- Hi.
- Hi.
1236
01:12:08,408 --> 01:12:11,076
Miss Marshall, what can I do for you?
1237
01:12:11,160 --> 01:12:13,745
Is there a place
to get good sushi around here?
1238
01:12:13,830 --> 01:12:15,987
Yeah. Yeah, there's a
really great place
1239
01:12:15,988 --> 01:12:18,250
about five minutes from
here called Asuki.
1240
01:12:18,334 --> 01:12:19,393
Perfect.
1241
01:12:19,477 --> 01:12:21,420
- Do you want me to get you a map?
- Please.
1242
01:12:21,504 --> 01:12:22,754
Okay.
1243
01:12:23,423 --> 01:12:26,800
So, this is where we are.
1244
01:12:26,884 --> 01:12:30,929
Head down Kamehameha,
and then pass Funaho Loko Marsh.
1245
01:12:31,014 --> 01:12:32,931
And it should be right to the left.
1246
01:12:33,016 --> 01:12:35,183
It might take, like, five minutes.
1247
01:12:35,309 --> 01:12:37,728
- Great. Thank you.
- Any time.
1248
01:12:41,441 --> 01:12:42,858
Um...
1249
01:12:42,942 --> 01:12:46,445
- I saw you with Peter Bretter...
- Yeah.
1250
01:12:46,529 --> 01:12:49,156
...who's my ex-boyfriend.
1251
01:12:49,240 --> 01:12:52,492
Oh, my God. I'm really sorry.
1252
01:12:52,577 --> 01:12:53,994
- No.
- It's not like that at all.
1253
01:12:53,999 --> 01:12:55,800
- It's not what you're...
- No, it's fine.
1254
01:12:55,810 --> 01:12:58,169
I'm just really glad
you're keeping him company, 'cause...
1255
01:12:58,170 --> 01:13:00,522
- Gosh, no.
- ...you seem like a really nice person,
1256
01:13:00,543 --> 01:13:03,253
- and you're very pretty.
- Thank you.
1257
01:13:03,337 --> 01:13:05,756
Gosh, you're, like, way prettier.
1258
01:13:05,840 --> 01:13:08,175
No, you're, like, so pretty.
1259
01:13:10,261 --> 01:13:11,595
Really?
1260
01:13:12,472 --> 01:13:15,974
- Yeah.
- Wow, thank you. Thank you.
1261
01:13:16,059 --> 01:13:18,143
And one more thing about Peter.
1262
01:13:18,227 --> 01:13:24,149
He's a really good guy. Really good.
Like, great, actually.
1263
01:13:24,567 --> 01:13:25,942
Yeah.
1264
01:13:26,527 --> 01:13:27,611
Um...
1265
01:13:31,365 --> 01:13:33,867
Please don't cry, Miss Marshall.
1266
01:13:33,951 --> 01:13:36,703
God. Do you need me to get you a tissue?
1267
01:13:36,788 --> 01:13:39,706
Oh, no, I'm good, I'm good.
I'm okay, I'm okay.
1268
01:13:40,541 --> 01:13:41,833
Okay.
1269
01:13:43,836 --> 01:13:47,672
- Thank you, Rachel.
- Any time, Miss Marshall.
1270
01:13:57,558 --> 01:13:59,684
Hey, ahoy, there!
1271
01:13:59,769 --> 01:14:01,394
You surf, too?
1272
01:14:01,479 --> 01:14:04,397
Good Lord, no.
I'm just drifting around, you know?
1273
01:14:04,482 --> 01:14:08,819
Getting in touch with the ocean and stuff.
It's really pleasant.
1274
01:14:08,903 --> 01:14:10,487
It was, yeah.
1275
01:14:12,115 --> 01:14:13,323
I'm gonna head in.
1276
01:14:13,407 --> 01:14:15,700
Before you go, actually, Peter,
I just wanted to tell you,
1277
01:14:15,785 --> 01:14:18,120
I was listening to Sarah's iPod
the other day,
1278
01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:22,082
and amidst the interminable dross
that's on that thing,
1279
01:14:22,166 --> 01:14:24,292
I found one track that I quite liked.
1280
01:14:24,377 --> 01:14:27,420
So I checked what it was,
and it was actually one of yours.
1281
01:14:27,505 --> 01:14:32,592
And it kind of reminded me of a dark,
gothic Neil Diamond. It's great.
1282
01:14:33,636 --> 01:14:35,887
That's, like, exactly what I'm going for.
1283
01:14:35,972 --> 01:14:37,514
Right, yeah.
1284
01:14:41,269 --> 01:14:42,686
Fuck.
1285
01:14:44,438 --> 01:14:46,106
Fuck, you're cool.
1286
01:14:47,567 --> 01:14:52,404
It's so hard to say,
because, like, I hate you in so many ways,
1287
01:14:54,407 --> 01:14:56,366
but whatever.
I can see why Sarah likes you.
1288
01:14:56,450 --> 01:14:59,953
No accounting for taste, I suppose.
In her case, anyway.
1289
01:15:00,037 --> 01:15:03,081
She was with me for five years,
so there you go.
1290
01:15:03,166 --> 01:15:06,126
Yeah, you got four on me there, mate.
1291
01:15:09,046 --> 01:15:11,298
You slept with Sarah a year ago?
1292
01:15:11,382 --> 01:15:15,635
I thought you knew!
Peter, please, don't take it seriously.
1293
01:15:15,720 --> 01:15:18,805
- What the fuck, man! You've...
- Don't get offended by that.
1294
01:15:18,890 --> 01:15:21,308
You can't be so casual about this!
1295
01:15:21,392 --> 01:15:23,977
This isn't Europe, okay?
There are rules here.
1296
01:15:24,103 --> 01:15:27,981
I'm really sorry.
I apologize for offending you, Peter.
1297
01:15:28,065 --> 01:15:31,193
I just hope this doesn't
ruin our friendship.
1298
01:15:31,277 --> 01:15:32,694
Well, what's that about?
1299
01:15:32,778 --> 01:15:34,754
What do you think it's about?
This is a big deal!
1300
01:15:34,839 --> 01:15:36,715
What about a code of the ocean?
That's not on.
1301
01:15:36,799 --> 01:15:37,908
What about codes among men?
1302
01:15:37,992 --> 01:15:39,851
You don't sleep
with another man's girlfriend!
1303
01:15:39,852 --> 01:15:41,119
- Think of...
- Get out of here!
1304
01:15:41,128 --> 01:15:43,755
- All right, okay! All right!
- Get out of here!
1305
01:16:08,314 --> 01:16:09,356
Oh, God!
1306
01:16:30,670 --> 01:16:34,089
PETER: Koonu! This guy needs help! Koonu!
1307
01:16:37,218 --> 01:16:40,262
- Should I call the front desk?
- It hurts. It hurts.
1308
01:16:40,346 --> 01:16:42,239
Wow, you got coral right there in your leg!
1309
01:16:42,240 --> 01:16:44,141
Can you get it out of my leg, please,
hotel man?
1310
01:16:44,142 --> 01:16:45,426
Can you do something about that?
1311
01:16:45,427 --> 01:16:47,562
I'd love to, you know,
but hotel policy...
1312
01:16:47,563 --> 01:16:49,597
They don't let me do
that kind of thing.
1313
01:16:49,730 --> 01:16:51,548
They get all weirded out. Insurance...
1314
01:16:51,549 --> 01:16:53,683
Koonu, can you call
the front desk for me, please?
1315
01:16:53,751 --> 01:16:55,277
- Yeah.
- It really hurts.
1316
01:16:55,361 --> 01:16:58,321
Koonu, call the front desk now!
1317
01:16:58,406 --> 01:17:00,407
Okay, monster man.
1318
01:17:00,491 --> 01:17:02,242
Pete, he's not gonna do nothing.
1319
01:17:02,326 --> 01:17:04,244
I kind of have this thing
about blood, okay?
1320
01:17:04,328 --> 01:17:08,081
Look at it. It's raping my leg. Peter,
get it out of my fucking leg, please!
1321
01:17:08,165 --> 01:17:10,333
One, two.
1322
01:17:10,418 --> 01:17:12,544
- You can't get it out.
- It's really in there.
1323
01:17:12,628 --> 01:17:15,046
- Get it out of me!
- Three!
1324
01:17:15,131 --> 01:17:17,340
Fuck my arse!
1325
01:17:17,425 --> 01:17:20,302
Okay, I got it. It's all done.
It's all over.
1326
01:17:20,386 --> 01:17:21,928
Everything looks fine.
1327
01:17:25,057 --> 01:17:27,934
It's all good! They're coming wiki wiki.
1328
01:17:28,019 --> 01:17:32,272
Can you get some towels for me, please?
I'm really losing a lot of blood.
1329
01:17:32,356 --> 01:17:34,357
You sound like you're from London.
1330
01:17:34,442 --> 01:17:36,609
Yeah, I'm from London.
1331
01:17:41,949 --> 01:17:43,783
What's going on?
1332
01:17:43,868 --> 01:17:47,954
SARAH: You fainted.
I didn't want you to wake up by yourself.
1333
01:17:48,039 --> 01:17:51,499
- How's your friend? Is he all right?
- Yeah.
1334
01:17:51,584 --> 01:17:53,960
They gave him stitches,
and he's sleeping it off.
1335
01:17:54,045 --> 01:17:56,129
- Hey, you wanna hear something funny?
- What?
1336
01:17:56,213 --> 01:17:58,465
Are you ready to laugh?
'Cause this is a gas.
1337
01:17:58,549 --> 01:17:59,799
Okay.
1338
01:17:59,884 --> 01:18:03,303
Edward Scissorhands over there told me
that you two were fucking each other
1339
01:18:03,387 --> 01:18:06,014
for a whole God damn year
while we were together.
1340
01:18:06,098 --> 01:18:07,182
Shit.
1341
01:18:07,266 --> 01:18:08,975
How about that, Sarah?
1342
01:18:09,060 --> 01:18:10,810
I'm sorry, Peter.
1343
01:18:11,937 --> 01:18:14,856
Pete, you shouldn't be up
and walking around. Can you please...
1344
01:18:14,940 --> 01:18:17,525
Please don't touch me.
Just don't touch me, okay?
1345
01:18:17,610 --> 01:18:19,277
I'm not touching you.
1346
01:18:19,362 --> 01:18:21,780
Will you just please sit? Please?
1347
01:18:22,740 --> 01:18:25,492
All right, I'll sit down,
but I'm sitting down 'cause I want to,
1348
01:18:25,576 --> 01:18:29,704
not because you've asked me to sit, okay?
1349
01:18:29,789 --> 01:18:31,122
Great.
1350
01:18:37,004 --> 01:18:38,296
A year?
1351
01:18:39,090 --> 01:18:41,674
Listen, I get it, okay? I just...
1352
01:18:41,842 --> 01:18:44,761
I need to understand what I did
to make you cheat. I just...
1353
01:18:44,845 --> 01:18:51,267
Pete, it's not anything you did.
1354
01:18:51,352 --> 01:18:55,146
You didn't do anything.
I mean, you were great.
1355
01:18:55,231 --> 01:18:57,941
Will you please cut the bullshit
and have a talk with me?
1356
01:18:58,025 --> 01:19:00,902
Fine. Cutting the bullshit.
1357
01:19:01,028 --> 01:19:03,120
It got really hard to
keep taking care of you
1358
01:19:03,121 --> 01:19:05,031
when you stopped taking
care of yourself.
1359
01:19:05,032 --> 01:19:06,482
I tried to get you out of the house.
1360
01:19:06,550 --> 01:19:11,246
I tried to get you off your little island
you loved so much, the couch.
1361
01:19:11,330 --> 01:19:12,997
You didn't wanna see the light of day!
1362
01:19:13,082 --> 01:19:17,377
God, there was one week
when you wore sweatpants! Every day.
1363
01:19:22,299 --> 01:19:25,885
You shall not pass!
1364
01:19:27,054 --> 01:19:30,223
You know what? If they were Sean John
sweatpants, it would have been fine.
1365
01:19:30,307 --> 01:19:33,393
But because they're Costco brand,
it's like the worst thing I could do.
1366
01:19:33,477 --> 01:19:37,021
That has nothing to do with it.
That's what you don't get.
1367
01:19:37,106 --> 01:19:40,817
I'm sorry that I didn't end up being
who we thought I was gonna be, you know?
1368
01:19:40,901 --> 01:19:45,738
I tried really hard. I promise you that.
I just didn't have it in me.
1369
01:19:45,823 --> 01:19:48,241
I think if you had just,
maybe tried harder.
1370
01:19:48,325 --> 01:19:50,660
I tried!
1371
01:19:50,744 --> 01:19:53,246
You have no idea how hard I tried, Peter.
1372
01:19:53,330 --> 01:19:54,914
I talked to a therapist.
1373
01:19:54,999 --> 01:19:57,292
I talked to my mother.
I read every book possible.
1374
01:19:57,376 --> 01:19:59,502
I took love seminars. I took sex seminars.
1375
01:19:59,587 --> 01:20:02,088
None of it worked.
None of it made a difference to you.
1376
01:20:02,173 --> 01:20:05,592
And I couldn't drown with you anymore.
1377
01:20:05,676 --> 01:20:10,263
Don't you dare sit there
and tell me that I didn't try.
1378
01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:12,390
I did.
1379
01:20:12,475 --> 01:20:15,018
You were just too stupid to notice.
1380
01:20:47,885 --> 01:20:50,970
Whoa. I thought you were gonna wear
the shirt I got you.
1381
01:20:51,055 --> 01:20:52,764
What? No.
1382
01:20:52,848 --> 01:20:55,558
I mean, I do love that shirt you got me.
1383
01:20:55,643 --> 01:20:58,269
I admire Sir Tommy Bahama an awful lot.
1384
01:20:58,354 --> 01:21:02,357
He's a talented man, but tonight,
I feel that this is appropriate.
1385
01:21:07,446 --> 01:21:10,907
Wow, thank you. Yeah, Sarah got it for me.
1386
01:21:12,284 --> 01:21:15,578
This is, like, way more convenient
than my backpack.
1387
01:21:18,874 --> 01:21:19,958
Awesome hat!
1388
01:21:20,042 --> 01:21:22,085
Thank you.
Yeah, my girlfriend got it for me!
1389
01:21:22,169 --> 01:21:24,796
- I'm fucking with you!
- Cool!
1390
01:21:29,260 --> 01:21:31,970
Sarah, can I use this lipstick, please?
1391
01:21:36,892 --> 01:21:39,852
Sure. I don't care.
1392
01:21:41,689 --> 01:21:44,165
I think it looks great.
But if you're not, let's go change.
1393
01:21:44,249 --> 01:21:47,569
No, I like it. I didn't like it at first.
Now I really think it's...
1394
01:21:47,653 --> 01:21:49,320
Oh, bloody hell. This is a small resort.
1395
01:21:49,405 --> 01:21:50,905
Hi, Peter.
1396
01:21:53,242 --> 01:21:54,867
Hey. Wow.
1397
01:21:56,078 --> 01:21:58,371
Aldous, Sarah, this is Rachel.
1398
01:21:58,455 --> 01:22:00,915
Sarah bought me this shirt.
1399
01:22:01,000 --> 01:22:02,333
I could've guessed that. Yeah.
1400
01:22:02,334 --> 01:22:03,701
- Looks great.
- You look great.
1401
01:22:03,769 --> 01:22:05,503
Looks awesome.
1402
01:22:05,588 --> 01:22:07,755
- See.
- Thanks.
1403
01:22:07,840 --> 01:22:11,610
Mr. Snow, I'm so sorry.
I did not know you guys were coming.
1404
01:22:11,694 --> 01:22:13,336
You're gonna have to wait five minutes.
1405
01:22:13,337 --> 01:22:14,821
I did not know you guys were coming.
1406
01:22:14,822 --> 01:22:16,131
It's okay. It's not a problem.
1407
01:22:16,181 --> 01:22:17,890
I didn't see you guys, so...
1408
01:22:17,975 --> 01:22:20,560
There's really no need to weep.
1409
01:22:21,270 --> 01:22:22,854
I'm not crying.
1410
01:22:24,273 --> 01:22:27,066
It's no problem, honestly.
It's not a problem.
1411
01:22:27,151 --> 01:22:30,236
- So, your table is ready, guys.
- Oh, great.
1412
01:22:30,321 --> 01:22:31,763
Hey, have a lovely evening, you two.
1413
01:22:31,764 --> 01:22:33,957
- Thank you. Have a great dinner, you guys.
- Thank you.
1414
01:22:33,958 --> 01:22:35,633
You're welcome to join us, obviously,
if you want.
1415
01:22:35,634 --> 01:22:37,168
- Okay.
- Wouldn't dream of it. What?
1416
01:22:37,202 --> 01:22:38,411
What?
1417
01:22:39,413 --> 01:22:41,205
- Oh, okay.
- Okay.
1418
01:22:41,290 --> 01:22:42,857
- RACHEL: That's great. Awesome.
- Sure.
1419
01:22:42,942 --> 01:22:44,492
Great. I'll just set two more places.
1420
01:22:44,576 --> 01:22:45,618
- Okay.
- Not a big deal.
1421
01:22:45,619 --> 01:22:46,936
Awesome.
1422
01:22:47,004 --> 01:22:51,215
So this is actually happening.
We're gonna let this happen.
1423
01:22:51,759 --> 01:22:52,800
I am so sorry.
1424
01:22:52,885 --> 01:22:55,720
I never thought in a million years
she would say yes.
1425
01:22:55,804 --> 01:22:56,929
I did.
1426
01:22:57,014 --> 01:22:59,974
What? I just accepted an invitation.
I didn't wanna be rude.
1427
01:23:00,059 --> 01:23:01,568
It's got us in a terrible situation.
1428
01:23:01,569 --> 01:23:04,128
Now I'm gonna have to sit with him
wearing this shirt all night.
1429
01:23:04,129 --> 01:23:05,680
You're wearing the shirt regardless.
1430
01:23:05,731 --> 01:23:07,482
Australia is amazing.
1431
01:23:07,566 --> 01:23:10,985
- I'm telling you. It is a great place to shoot.
- Yeah?
1432
01:23:11,111 --> 01:23:14,364
Rachel, you would love it.
You would love it.
1433
01:23:14,448 --> 01:23:17,158
I wanna go. I really,
really wanna go there.
1434
01:23:17,242 --> 01:23:19,327
- Wait, so when's the movie coming out?
- Mmm.
1435
01:23:20,496 --> 01:23:22,330
It came out.
1436
01:23:22,414 --> 01:23:24,332
- It was already released.
- Oh.
1437
01:23:27,044 --> 01:23:28,920
Well, you know, it's an island.
1438
01:23:29,004 --> 01:23:29,988
It's isolated.
1439
01:23:30,072 --> 01:23:31,889
- Yeah.
- Movies don't really come out here.
1440
01:23:31,890 --> 01:23:34,233
- Obviously.
- Did you like it?
1441
01:23:34,301 --> 01:23:36,010
- The movie?
- Yeah.
1442
01:23:36,970 --> 01:23:39,138
- It was...
- Awful bloody film.
1443
01:23:39,223 --> 01:23:41,391
I say, it's just a ridiculous premise.
1444
01:23:41,475 --> 01:23:45,144
What would happen
if your mobile phone killed you?
1445
01:23:45,229 --> 01:23:47,522
Why would a mobile phone kill anyone?
Doesn't make sense.
1446
01:23:47,606 --> 01:23:50,158
How can a mobile phone have an agenda
and kill people...
1447
01:23:50,159 --> 01:23:51,943
I told her that when she read the script.
1448
01:23:51,944 --> 01:23:53,728
Yeah. You were the voice of reason, mate.
1449
01:23:53,779 --> 01:23:55,405
I tried to be, but she didn't listen.
1450
01:23:55,406 --> 01:23:58,016
Going around killing people.
A mobile phone, like, doing murders.
1451
01:23:58,083 --> 01:24:00,343
Why couldn't you just take the battery
out of the phone?
1452
01:24:00,344 --> 01:24:02,320
ALDOUS: Right. That's it.
The battle's over.
1453
01:24:02,387 --> 01:24:04,238
- Yeah, we've won.
- ALDOUS: I hated it.
1454
01:24:04,323 --> 01:24:06,107
Well, it's not for everyone, but it...
1455
01:24:06,291 --> 01:24:08,292
No, it's ridiculous.
Here's my favorite scene.
1456
01:24:08,377 --> 01:24:10,044
Ring-ring. Hello?
1457
01:24:10,579 --> 01:24:12,630
- ALDOUS: Right. It would never happen.
- Yeah.
1458
01:24:12,715 --> 01:24:14,048
No, it could never happen.
1459
01:24:14,133 --> 01:24:18,219
It's a metaphor for
addiction to technology.
1460
01:24:18,303 --> 01:24:22,390
For society,
for how we're reliant on technology.
1461
01:24:22,474 --> 01:24:23,558
I get it. I'm with you.
1462
01:24:23,642 --> 01:24:25,101
It's a metaphor for a crap movie.
1463
01:24:25,310 --> 01:24:27,437
Well, it was the right choice
for me at the time.
1464
01:24:27,521 --> 01:24:29,188
- RACHEL: Sure.
- You know?
1465
01:24:42,327 --> 01:24:44,328
Well, this is awkward.
1466
01:24:47,249 --> 01:24:48,374
Yeah?
1467
01:24:49,042 --> 01:24:51,461
- It's a bit more awkward now.
- RACHEL: A little.
1468
01:24:51,545 --> 01:24:54,422
Hey, excuse me.
Can we get another bottle of wine, please?
1469
01:24:54,506 --> 01:24:55,715
- Sure.
- Thank you.
1470
01:24:55,799 --> 01:24:56,841
Mr. Snow?
1471
01:24:56,925 --> 01:24:59,318
Can I get cranberry juice
with a bit of lime in it, please.
1472
01:24:59,403 --> 01:25:01,428
Do you want cranberry juice
or cranberry cocktail?
1473
01:25:01,513 --> 01:25:03,973
Because I can probably rustle up either one.
Throw some OJ...
1474
01:25:04,057 --> 01:25:05,641
I don't care.
1475
01:25:05,726 --> 01:25:07,143
Okay, great.
1476
01:25:16,612 --> 01:25:18,988
Hey, can we get another bottle of wine?
1477
01:25:28,457 --> 01:25:30,458
If I've learned anything from addiction,
it's that,
1478
01:25:30,542 --> 01:25:34,646
you know, life is as brief as the
twinkling of a star over all too soon.
1479
01:25:34,730 --> 01:25:37,089
So if you're in a situation
where you're with a woman,
1480
01:25:37,174 --> 01:25:40,593
why not do the most interesting thing
that you can do in that situation?
1481
01:25:40,677 --> 01:25:43,137
And by which, I don't mean
have a conversation,
1482
01:25:43,222 --> 01:25:44,639
have a chin-wag, a bit of a chat.
1483
01:25:44,723 --> 01:25:48,100
Lose yourself in something
that's both ancient and perennial.
1484
01:25:48,185 --> 01:25:52,605
Find something eternal, perpetual.
Lose yourself in fuck.
1485
01:25:54,483 --> 01:25:56,651
I'm going to disagree.
1486
01:25:56,735 --> 01:25:58,152
Respectfully, of course, sir.
1487
01:25:58,237 --> 01:26:00,321
Maybe for you, that works.
1488
01:26:00,405 --> 01:26:03,374
For me, it's much more enjoyable
to get to know somebody.
1489
01:26:03,459 --> 01:26:05,459
If you end up sleeping with them,
that's great.
1490
01:26:05,544 --> 01:26:07,411
But I like getting to know somebody.
1491
01:26:07,496 --> 01:26:08,538
But he...
1492
01:26:08,997 --> 01:26:13,000
What he's saying is that
he's gonna stick it wherever he wants,
1493
01:26:13,085 --> 01:26:15,670
but he's joking.
1494
01:26:15,754 --> 01:26:17,380
I ain't. No, I'm not joking.
1495
01:26:17,464 --> 01:26:19,966
It's just what I believe, really.
1496
01:26:21,260 --> 01:26:22,677
So...
1497
01:26:22,845 --> 01:26:28,474
Just so we're clear and so I can hone in
on your central thesis of the night,
1498
01:26:28,559 --> 01:26:30,059
wade through all the bullshit,
1499
01:26:30,143 --> 01:26:32,812
you're telling me
that you think you have the right
1500
01:26:32,896 --> 01:26:35,265
to just fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime?
1501
01:26:35,349 --> 01:26:37,867
- Yes. There it is. That's right.
- That's what you're saying?
1502
01:26:37,951 --> 01:26:40,695
Not so eloquently
as you just put it, sweetheart.
1503
01:26:40,779 --> 01:26:42,113
But ultimately, yes, that is...
1504
01:26:42,197 --> 01:26:44,198
Oh, no! Not the shirt!
1505
01:26:44,283 --> 01:26:47,368
Take my eyes, but not the shirt. Mmm.
1506
01:26:47,828 --> 01:26:50,746
Yeah, that's pretty much
what I believe, Sarah.
1507
01:26:50,831 --> 01:26:53,332
When you're done making jokes,
are you gonna get a napkin?
1508
01:26:53,333 --> 01:26:56,151
Do you know what? I think I've improved it,
actually, against all odds.
1509
01:26:56,219 --> 01:26:57,611
I think I deserve a design award.
1510
01:26:57,696 --> 01:26:59,297
Please get some seltzer water.
1511
01:26:59,381 --> 01:27:03,634
- Garçon, could we get some...
- I saw it from farther away.
1512
01:27:03,719 --> 01:27:05,536
- Okay.
- Just lean back for a second.
1513
01:27:05,621 --> 01:27:07,430
No, it's all right. It's not there.
Let me...
1514
01:27:07,514 --> 01:27:09,131
You're very diligent. I appreciate it.
1515
01:27:09,216 --> 01:27:11,450
Let go of the glass now.
You're gonna have to walk away.
1516
01:27:11,534 --> 01:27:12,885
Bless you. There you are.
1517
01:27:12,978 --> 01:27:14,770
Oh, me, oh, my.
1518
01:27:15,689 --> 01:27:17,857
- Call the doctor.
- Oh, good.
1519
01:27:26,909 --> 01:27:29,076
- I love Hawaii.
- Is it good?
1520
01:27:29,161 --> 01:27:33,247
Yeah, it's nice,
but I think for like a week tops.
1521
01:27:33,332 --> 01:27:35,041
Anymore than that, I know I'd go crazy,
1522
01:27:35,125 --> 01:27:38,920
because I think that
Hawaii is a place to escape
1523
01:27:39,004 --> 01:27:42,006
for people who can't deal
with the real world.
1524
01:27:44,217 --> 01:27:49,305
Yeah, you know, there's so few
personal shoppers and pet therapists.
1525
01:27:49,389 --> 01:27:51,557
Gosh, it's such a hard life.
1526
01:28:01,818 --> 01:28:03,611
I like living here.
1527
01:28:05,989 --> 01:28:08,991
- Anyone need anymore vino?
- I think we're good.
1528
01:28:11,078 --> 01:28:12,870
I've a question for you real quick, Mr. S.
1529
01:28:12,955 --> 01:28:16,207
I was actually meaning to ask you,
what did you exactly think of my demo?
1530
01:28:16,291 --> 01:28:18,626
Did you get it? Did you get it?
1531
01:28:18,710 --> 01:28:21,504
Oh, no. I was gonna listen to that,
1532
01:28:21,588 --> 01:28:24,757
but then I just carried on living my life.
1533
01:28:27,636 --> 01:28:28,844
Not at all?
1534
01:28:28,929 --> 01:28:32,807
No, I didn't, because, you know,
I go on my instincts,
1535
01:28:32,891 --> 01:28:34,600
and they weren't good.
1536
01:28:36,311 --> 01:28:40,106
You know what, dude?
Fuck you, okay? You can go fuck yourself.
1537
01:28:40,190 --> 01:28:42,108
I can't yell right now
because I'll get fired.
1538
01:28:42,192 --> 01:28:43,134
My boss will hear me,
1539
01:28:43,135 --> 01:28:45,294
and then I won't be able
to pay off my student loans.
1540
01:28:45,362 --> 01:28:48,155
But you know what? You're an asshole.
I fucking hate you.
1541
01:28:48,240 --> 01:28:49,365
I bought all your records.
1542
01:28:49,366 --> 01:28:52,476
This whole fucking time, I've been trying
to get you to come hang out with me.
1543
01:28:52,477 --> 01:28:56,572
I'm gonna have people fuck with your food
the rest of your trip, you fucking dick!
1544
01:28:56,623 --> 01:28:59,041
I like him. That was quite moving.
1545
01:29:14,391 --> 01:29:15,725
Wait, wait, wait.
1546
01:29:15,809 --> 01:29:17,643
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
1547
01:29:18,603 --> 01:29:20,855
Are you sure that you're not,
like, too drunk?
1548
01:29:20,939 --> 01:29:23,649
Jesus, would you stop being so sensitive.
1549
01:29:49,926 --> 01:29:50,968
Aldous.
1550
01:29:52,471 --> 01:29:53,763
Wake up.
1551
01:29:53,930 --> 01:29:56,557
- Aldous. Wake up.
- Hmm...
1552
01:29:56,641 --> 01:29:58,267
Make love to me.
1553
01:30:00,245 --> 01:30:03,005
All right. You go on top, though,
'cause I'm knackered.
1554
01:30:18,747 --> 01:30:19,955
Listen.
1555
01:30:22,334 --> 01:30:24,126
Yes! Yes!
1556
01:30:26,963 --> 01:30:28,964
- Yeah.
- SARAH: Yes!
1557
01:30:29,049 --> 01:30:30,591
- Oh, yes!
- Yeah!
1558
01:30:33,553 --> 01:30:35,679
- Yeah! Oh, God!
- Yeah!
1559
01:30:39,893 --> 01:30:41,310
- Right there!
- Yes!
1560
01:30:41,394 --> 01:30:43,854
- Yes!
- Yes! She's having an orgasm!
1561
01:30:43,939 --> 01:30:45,815
This is the best sex ever!
1562
01:30:45,899 --> 01:30:47,775
Yeah, all right, that'll do.
1563
01:30:48,443 --> 01:30:49,652
What?
1564
01:30:50,821 --> 01:30:52,696
I made a mistake coming here with you.
1565
01:30:56,409 --> 01:30:58,577
And I'm not done either!
1566
01:30:59,621 --> 01:31:01,705
- Please shut up! Okay.
- Okay!
1567
01:31:01,790 --> 01:31:03,999
You're still involved with him next door,
ain't you?
1568
01:31:04,084 --> 01:31:05,126
Excuse me?
1569
01:31:05,210 --> 01:31:07,002
You should've seen yourself
at dinner, Sarah.
1570
01:31:07,087 --> 01:31:11,465
Then we come back here,
and you put on that ghastly performance.
1571
01:31:11,550 --> 01:31:14,510
I mean, I've heard that
women do fake orgasms,
1572
01:31:14,594 --> 01:31:16,095
but I've never seen one.
1573
01:31:16,179 --> 01:31:18,305
It really deeply upset me.
1574
01:31:18,390 --> 01:31:21,016
You should have seen yourself at dinner.
1575
01:31:21,101 --> 01:31:25,312
"Oh, I'm Aldous Snow.
Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
1576
01:31:25,397 --> 01:31:27,398
"No, no drinks for me, thanks.
1577
01:31:27,482 --> 01:31:29,066
"Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit."
1578
01:31:29,151 --> 01:31:31,735
That's a really reductive impression.
1579
01:31:31,820 --> 01:31:34,380
If I wanted to see you act badly,
I'd just watch your TV show,
1580
01:31:34,381 --> 01:31:36,807
which, obviously, I can't now,
because it's been canceled.
1581
01:31:36,808 --> 01:31:38,750
Oh, my God, you're such a prick.
1582
01:31:38,802 --> 01:31:39,785
And you know what?
1583
01:31:39,870 --> 01:31:42,913
Let me tell you something
about these tattoos, okay?
1584
01:31:42,998 --> 01:31:47,168
That is Buddhist. That is Nordic.
That is Hindu. That's just gibberish.
1585
01:31:47,252 --> 01:31:49,378
They are completely conflicting ideologies.
1586
01:31:49,462 --> 01:31:51,714
And that does not make you
a citizen of the world.
1587
01:31:51,798 --> 01:31:53,799
It makes you full of shit.
1588
01:31:57,262 --> 01:31:59,930
Was that genuine or did you fake that?
1589
01:32:01,850 --> 01:32:05,461
Right. I'm gonna probably clear off now.
1590
01:32:05,546 --> 01:32:07,646
I'll have a little sleep for a few hours,
1591
01:32:07,731 --> 01:32:11,650
then I'm gonna probably go
in the morning, okay?
1592
01:32:16,364 --> 01:32:18,490
I hate your music.
1593
01:32:18,575 --> 01:32:21,869
Yeah, well,
I fucked the housekeeper the other day.
1594
01:32:28,251 --> 01:32:29,919
Are you sleeping?
1595
01:32:30,754 --> 01:32:32,213
Not anymore.
1596
01:32:37,761 --> 01:32:41,931
I know that I'm leaving in a couple
of days, so I don't even know
1597
01:32:43,892 --> 01:32:45,935
what the hell this means,
1598
01:32:49,439 --> 01:32:52,316
but I really like spending
time with you a lot.
1599
01:32:55,779 --> 01:32:57,446
I know. Me too.
1600
01:33:06,289 --> 01:33:07,331
Hey.
1601
01:33:13,463 --> 01:33:14,964
Good morning.
1602
01:33:17,801 --> 01:33:19,093
Where are you going?
1603
01:33:19,177 --> 01:33:22,554
The Korean Textile Manufacturer's Luau.
1604
01:33:22,639 --> 01:33:24,932
- Just kill me.
- Fun.
1605
01:33:25,016 --> 01:33:26,141
Joy.
1606
01:33:27,978 --> 01:33:31,689
I want you to know
that I meant what I said last night.
1607
01:33:32,941 --> 01:33:34,483
I know you did.
1608
01:33:35,735 --> 01:33:37,319
I did, too.
1609
01:33:39,739 --> 01:33:42,491
- Can I see you again tonight?
- Yeah.
1610
01:33:43,576 --> 01:33:45,536
- I get off at 7:00.
- Yay.
1611
01:33:46,371 --> 01:33:47,538
Bye.
1612
01:33:50,500 --> 01:33:51,834
Sir, morning mai tai.
1613
01:33:51,918 --> 01:33:53,711
You know what?
1614
01:33:53,837 --> 01:33:57,840
I actually will not be having
an alcoholic beverage this morning.
1615
01:34:25,368 --> 01:34:27,369
- KIDS: Jump! Jump! Jump!
- Don't make me do it.
1616
01:34:46,973 --> 01:34:48,974
Hey. Morning, mate.
1617
01:34:49,726 --> 01:34:53,437
- How are you today?
- Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. You okay?
1618
01:34:53,521 --> 01:34:55,647
Am I okay? I'm better than okay, my friend.
1619
01:34:55,732 --> 01:34:57,232
You seem sprightly.
1620
01:34:57,317 --> 01:34:58,692
I...
1621
01:34:59,235 --> 01:35:00,861
I had a great time last night.
1622
01:35:00,945 --> 01:35:04,239
- Congratulations. Well done. Well done.
- Thank you.
1623
01:35:04,324 --> 01:35:06,116
What about you? What's with the bag?
1624
01:35:06,201 --> 01:35:09,020
Right, yeah. I'm off back to England, mate.
1625
01:35:09,104 --> 01:35:11,038
Oh, you and Sarah are going to England.
1626
01:35:11,122 --> 01:35:13,582
No, no, no. I'm just going alone.
1627
01:35:13,976 --> 01:35:16,210
- Yeah.
- Did you guys have a fight or something?
1628
01:35:16,294 --> 01:35:19,880
Yeah, it was really... How you served
five years under her, I don't know.
1629
01:35:19,964 --> 01:35:24,593
You deserve a medal or a holiday
or at least a cuddle from somebody.
1630
01:35:24,677 --> 01:35:26,345
You were only here for a week.
1631
01:35:26,429 --> 01:35:28,555
Well, I don't know.
For me, that one week of it
1632
01:35:28,640 --> 01:35:33,227
was like going on holiday with,
I don't know, I wouldn't say Hitler,
1633
01:35:33,311 --> 01:35:36,730
but certainly Goebbels.
It was like a little holiday with Hitler.
1634
01:35:36,815 --> 01:35:38,148
Jesus.
1635
01:35:38,233 --> 01:35:41,735
Hey, listen, at least it's clear now
for you two to reconnect.
1636
01:35:41,820 --> 01:35:43,070
Oh...
1637
01:35:44,322 --> 01:35:46,490
No, no. No.
1638
01:35:46,574 --> 01:35:48,909
You know what?
I have a good thing going on with Rachel,
1639
01:35:48,993 --> 01:35:50,702
and I want to see that through.
1640
01:35:50,787 --> 01:35:54,206
Well, maybe you could have both of them.
Rachel and Sarah.
1641
01:35:54,290 --> 01:35:57,167
They got on all right, didn't
they, at dinner? So maybe...
1642
01:35:57,252 --> 01:35:59,586
You know what?
First of all, I'm not that kind of guy.
1643
01:35:59,671 --> 01:36:01,976
And even if I was, I
don't think that I have
1644
01:36:01,977 --> 01:36:04,383
the sexual competency to
really pull that off.
1645
01:36:04,509 --> 01:36:06,051
Yeah. It's a gift.
1646
01:36:06,177 --> 01:36:09,346
I will say,
if you do get back with Miss Marshall,
1647
01:36:09,431 --> 01:36:11,723
handle with care, because, you know...
1648
01:36:13,935 --> 01:36:15,602
Okay. Well, I think my ride's here.
1649
01:36:15,687 --> 01:36:18,355
So I'm gonna skedaddle then
before anything else happens to me.
1650
01:36:18,440 --> 01:36:20,107
Before life gets anymore daft.
1651
01:36:20,191 --> 01:36:21,733
Is someone gonna take that?
1652
01:36:21,860 --> 01:36:24,528
Listen, don't let them grind you down.
1653
01:36:25,697 --> 01:36:26,947
Take it easy.
1654
01:36:27,031 --> 01:36:29,700
Hey, look at my driver.
I'm gonna have sex with her.
1655
01:36:34,205 --> 01:36:36,915
He said it was clear I wasn't over you.
1656
01:36:39,419 --> 01:36:41,211
And then he left.
1657
01:36:41,296 --> 01:36:42,880
Fucking prick.
1658
01:36:44,757 --> 01:36:48,051
And then I started thinking,
what if he's right?
1659
01:36:48,136 --> 01:36:51,054
What if I'm not over you?
1660
01:36:52,932 --> 01:36:55,893
- Sarah...
- Please just let me finish, Pete.
1661
01:37:02,901 --> 01:37:06,069
What if I made
a really, really horrible mistake?
1662
01:37:08,948 --> 01:37:13,160
- Sarah.
- Yeah?
1663
01:37:13,244 --> 01:37:15,704
Stop pulling my face towards your face.
1664
01:37:15,788 --> 01:37:17,539
Why?
1665
01:37:17,624 --> 01:37:19,208
You don't like it?
1666
01:37:19,292 --> 01:37:23,879
Listen, pulling my shirt towards you
is the same concept as pulling my face.
1667
01:37:23,963 --> 01:37:28,217
Let's spend one more night here together,
and then let's go home and then...
1668
01:37:28,301 --> 01:37:30,177
And we'll just pretend
like it never happened.
1669
01:37:30,261 --> 01:37:32,304
- ...face reality. No.
- That's the big plan?
1670
01:37:32,430 --> 01:37:34,139
No. I love you.
1671
01:37:34,265 --> 01:37:37,434
That's not fair.
That's not fair of you to say that to me.
1672
01:37:39,312 --> 01:37:40,854
Please, Peter.
1673
01:37:43,775 --> 01:37:46,276
- Tell me you're sorry.
- I'm so sorry.
1674
01:37:49,614 --> 01:37:51,156
I missed you.
1675
01:37:56,371 --> 01:37:57,538
I'm sorry.
1676
01:38:00,500 --> 01:38:02,543
God, I missed you, Peter.
1677
01:38:09,717 --> 01:38:10,801
All right.
1678
01:38:11,386 --> 01:38:14,763
Get hard for me, Pete. Get hard for me.
1679
01:38:14,847 --> 01:38:17,558
- I know what I'm supposed to do.
- Okay.
1680
01:38:17,642 --> 01:38:19,601
Just do it. Come on. Get hard.
1681
01:38:19,686 --> 01:38:21,153
- I'm trying.
- Okay.
1682
01:38:21,179 --> 01:38:23,413
- Here. Just let me do it for a second.
- Okay.
1683
01:38:25,483 --> 01:38:28,694
I really want you, Peter. I missed you.
1684
01:38:28,820 --> 01:38:30,153
You don't want help?
1685
01:38:30,238 --> 01:38:33,574
- You don't want help? Uh-huh.
- Can you be quiet just for a minute?
1686
01:38:33,658 --> 01:38:34,700
Do you want my hands?
1687
01:38:34,826 --> 01:38:38,078
Maybe just don't talk for a second
is what I mean.
1688
01:38:39,163 --> 01:38:40,622
Do you want my mouth?
1689
01:38:40,707 --> 01:38:43,250
- Yeah, maybe your mouth.
- Yeah. Okay.
1690
01:38:51,759 --> 01:38:54,344
What's the problem, Peter?
1691
01:38:54,429 --> 01:38:56,513
- I don't know...
- More?
1692
01:38:56,598 --> 01:38:59,016
You can keep trying if you want.
1693
01:39:03,396 --> 01:39:05,355
What's wrong with you?
1694
01:39:05,523 --> 01:39:07,366
- Nothing is wrong with me, okay?
- Okay.
1695
01:39:07,392 --> 01:39:09,951
- No, I didn't...
- Just, something doesn't feel right anymore.
1696
01:39:10,036 --> 01:39:11,670
Okay. Well, did you... You know what?
1697
01:39:11,696 --> 01:39:13,922
Did you drink today?
Because sometimes when you drink...
1698
01:39:14,006 --> 01:39:15,324
Excuse me.
1699
01:39:15,408 --> 01:39:18,368
No, I haven't had anything to drink today.
1700
01:39:20,705 --> 01:39:25,292
Maybe the problem is that
you broke my heart into a million pieces,
1701
01:39:25,376 --> 01:39:29,004
and so my cock doesn't want
to be around you anymore, okay?
1702
01:39:29,088 --> 01:39:30,213
Ever!
1703
01:39:32,258 --> 01:39:34,801
Because you know what I just realized?
Huh?
1704
01:39:34,886 --> 01:39:37,721
You're the God damn devil. Okay?
1705
01:39:42,393 --> 01:39:45,270
Wedding in Hawaii! Real original!
1706
01:39:56,240 --> 01:39:58,533
- Hey.
- Hey, Rachel.
1707
01:39:59,869 --> 01:40:02,871
- Sarah and Aldous broke up this morning.
- What a surprise.
1708
01:40:02,955 --> 01:40:05,749
So I went to check on Sarah, and...
1709
01:40:08,586 --> 01:40:10,921
Listen, I'm here
because I don't want to lie to you, okay?
1710
01:40:11,047 --> 01:40:12,881
Some stuff happened.
1711
01:40:12,965 --> 01:40:14,883
I'm really, really sorry that it did,
1712
01:40:14,967 --> 01:40:17,886
but I'm also really glad
that it did, because
1713
01:40:17,970 --> 01:40:22,641
I'm able to see so clearly now that Sarah
and I are not right for each other.
1714
01:40:23,935 --> 01:40:25,310
What stuff?
1715
01:40:27,480 --> 01:40:33,110
I went up to make sure that she was okay,
and it got weird.
1716
01:40:33,236 --> 01:40:35,028
But now everything is fine.
1717
01:40:35,113 --> 01:40:36,555
And I need you to understand
1718
01:40:36,581 --> 01:40:38,949
that I meant everything that I said
to you this morning.
1719
01:40:39,075 --> 01:40:40,283
What exactly happened, Peter?
1720
01:40:40,410 --> 01:40:41,910
We fooled around a little bit.
1721
01:40:41,994 --> 01:40:45,288
Shut the fuck up,
and tell me exactly what you did.
1722
01:40:46,958 --> 01:40:52,796
All right. I went to her room,
and she was crying and crying and crying.
1723
01:40:52,964 --> 01:40:55,090
And I felt like I should comfort her.
1724
01:40:55,174 --> 01:40:58,468
And then she started kissing me
because I was comforting her.
1725
01:40:58,636 --> 01:41:00,637
And then the next thing I knew,
I was kissing her
1726
01:41:00,663 --> 01:41:02,948
because she had been kissing me
because of the comforting.
1727
01:41:02,974 --> 01:41:06,810
Then she started taking my clothes off,
and then her clothes were off.
1728
01:41:09,981 --> 01:41:13,734
Then she performed
1 0 to 1 5 seconds of oral sex on me.
1729
01:41:13,818 --> 01:41:15,235
Okay. Peter, you can leave now.
1730
01:41:15,319 --> 01:41:17,888
- At the most. Maximum.
- Thank you for staying at Turtle Bay.
1731
01:41:17,914 --> 01:41:19,197
Rachel, please don't do this.
1732
01:41:19,198 --> 01:41:21,975
The only reason I'm telling you this
is because I really care about...
1733
01:41:21,976 --> 01:41:23,877
Listen to me, Peter.
1734
01:41:23,953 --> 01:41:26,955
I was a mess, too. I understand. Okay?
1735
01:41:27,039 --> 01:41:30,292
But it does not excuse
you acting like a complete asshole.
1736
01:41:30,376 --> 01:41:33,128
Listen, I know that
I fucked things up for a minute,
1737
01:41:33,212 --> 01:41:34,796
but I'm not like every other asshole.
1738
01:41:34,881 --> 01:41:38,467
You should not be with anybody right now.
1739
01:41:38,551 --> 01:41:39,843
Anybody.
1740
01:41:41,679 --> 01:41:43,555
I know...
1741
01:41:43,681 --> 01:41:45,223
I know that there is something here.
1742
01:41:45,349 --> 01:41:47,142
I know that I was not wrong about that.
1743
01:41:47,226 --> 01:41:51,188
And, yes, it's only been four days,
but I know you feel it, too.
1744
01:41:55,860 --> 01:41:57,694
I need you to leave.
1745
01:41:59,697 --> 01:42:03,658
Do not write me. Do not call me.
Do not e-mail me.
1746
01:42:09,373 --> 01:42:11,500
Peter, I need you to go.
1747
01:42:15,963 --> 01:42:18,048
I won't bother you anymore.
1748
01:42:19,050 --> 01:42:20,383
I'm sorry.
1749
01:42:27,850 --> 01:42:29,810
I don't know what to do.
1750
01:42:37,335 --> 01:42:39,736
Hey, brother, what you doing, huh?
You stealing my art?
1751
01:42:39,821 --> 01:42:42,322
I want you to put it back right now.
Put it back, bro!
1752
01:42:42,406 --> 01:42:44,825
Listen, give me the picture.
1753
01:42:44,909 --> 01:42:47,244
Doo-doo paper.
You're throwing doo-doo paper?
1754
01:42:47,411 --> 01:42:49,079
Give me the picture.
1755
01:42:51,833 --> 01:42:55,085
Don't be stupid, brother.
Just give me the picture.
1756
01:42:55,211 --> 01:42:58,797
You can hit me as many times as you want.
I'm not giving you the photo back.
1757
01:42:59,131 --> 01:43:00,257
Oh, yeah.
1758
01:43:05,930 --> 01:43:09,558
No, no, no. Peter, I told you
I did not want to see you.
1759
01:43:28,870 --> 01:43:32,422
Aloha, l'm Sarah Marshall
from Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime.
1760
01:43:32,448 --> 01:43:34,291
And when l'm not scrubbing for evidence,
1761
01:43:34,375 --> 01:43:37,878
l'm flying Hawaiian Airlines
to my favorite destinations.
1762
01:43:37,962 --> 01:43:40,463
Now sit back
and enjoy your in-flight entertainment.
1763
01:43:40,548 --> 01:43:42,465
l know l will. Mahalo.
1764
01:43:42,967 --> 01:43:46,303
Everybody hates you
1765
01:43:46,429 --> 01:43:49,806
Everybody wishes that you were dead
1766
01:43:49,891 --> 01:43:51,474
Because, Peter, you suck
1767
01:43:51,601 --> 01:43:53,476
Peter, you suck
1768
01:43:53,561 --> 01:43:56,813
Peter, your music is fucking terrible
1769
01:43:56,939 --> 01:44:00,150
Peter, you suck
1770
01:44:00,234 --> 01:44:03,486
Peter, you don't do anything of value
1771
01:44:03,571 --> 01:44:05,071
Peter, you suck
1772
01:44:05,156 --> 01:44:09,492
Write some music but instead
you sit and write these bullshit songs
1773
01:44:09,660 --> 01:44:11,328
lt's so self-loathing
1774
01:44:11,412 --> 01:44:14,664
Go see a psychiatrist
l hate the psychiatrist
1775
01:44:14,749 --> 01:44:16,166
Well, go see one anyway
1776
01:44:16,292 --> 01:44:17,667
l don't like the psychiatrist
1777
01:44:17,752 --> 01:44:19,336
You need to go and see one
1778
01:44:19,462 --> 01:44:20,921
See a psychiatrist
1779
01:44:21,005 --> 01:44:22,464
l'm not going
1780
01:44:58,209 --> 01:45:03,713
lt's getting kind of hard to believe
things are going to get better
1781
01:45:50,178 --> 01:45:52,303
I don't understand
what there is to think about.
1782
01:45:52,388 --> 01:45:53,513
Because, D, he...
1783
01:45:53,597 --> 01:45:56,057
She licked the tip. That doesn't count.
1784
01:45:56,183 --> 01:45:58,935
- Of course it counts. He...
- He what?
1785
01:45:59,020 --> 01:46:02,564
He refused a blowjob
from his ex-girlfriend mid-blowjob.
1786
01:46:02,648 --> 01:46:05,567
Do you know what that's like for a man?
It's called blue balls, Rachel.
1787
01:46:05,651 --> 01:46:07,777
This guy is like Gandhi, but better.
1788
01:46:07,862 --> 01:46:08,903
He likes puppets.
1789
01:46:08,988 --> 01:46:10,530
I love puppets.
1790
01:46:10,781 --> 01:46:14,576
I love Fraggle Rock. I love Lamb Chop.
I love Elmo.
1791
01:46:14,660 --> 01:46:18,121
Sesame Street, Bert and Ernie,
Snuffelupagus. Fucks my shit up.
1792
01:46:22,334 --> 01:46:25,920
This is a song that
l never thought l would write
1793
01:46:26,005 --> 01:46:28,131
On the night l'm dying
1794
01:46:28,215 --> 01:46:31,301
Sorry for all the wrong l've done
1795
01:46:31,385 --> 01:46:33,178
l'm finished trying
1796
01:46:33,262 --> 01:46:38,349
lt was a wonderful dream
Now let him come and slay me
1797
01:46:38,434 --> 01:46:39,976
There he is
1798
01:46:40,061 --> 01:46:42,771
The demon
who haunted the streets of London
1799
01:46:42,855 --> 01:46:44,397
l've come to slay you
1800
01:46:44,482 --> 01:46:46,024
Here l am!
1801
01:46:46,108 --> 01:46:48,610
l'll leave you bleeding in my dungeon
1802
01:46:48,694 --> 01:46:52,405
l'll never obey you
l'll rip out your esophagus
1803
01:46:52,490 --> 01:46:57,327
Please, Mr. Van Helsing
Listen to me
1804
01:46:57,411 --> 01:47:02,832
He is just a man who wishes to be free
1805
01:47:02,917 --> 01:47:06,086
Lay him in a hearse
You must end this curse
1806
01:47:06,170 --> 01:47:07,921
He is the worst!
1807
01:47:20,518 --> 01:47:23,853
Don't go my love
1808
01:47:23,938 --> 01:47:27,899
l can't say goodbye
1809
01:47:27,983 --> 01:47:31,694
My reign is done
1810
01:47:31,779 --> 01:47:37,075
lt's time to die
1811
01:47:37,952 --> 01:47:39,619
l'm pregnant
1812
01:47:39,703 --> 01:47:41,412
Dracula
1813
01:47:41,497 --> 01:47:42,705
VAN HELSlNG: What have l done?
1814
01:47:42,790 --> 01:47:44,999
Has flown above
1815
01:47:45,084 --> 01:47:46,376
Who killed Dracula?
1816
01:47:46,460 --> 01:47:49,879
But he found a taste
1817
01:47:49,964 --> 01:47:52,924
A taste for love
1818
01:47:53,008 --> 01:47:55,593
My life is a lie
1819
01:47:55,678 --> 01:48:01,349
Sweet Dracula
l miss my young dead prince
1820
01:48:01,433 --> 01:48:05,603
l'll never see him again
1821
01:48:05,688 --> 01:48:08,148
Until my death
1822
01:48:08,232 --> 01:48:11,484
What a wonderful dream
1823
01:48:11,569 --> 01:48:17,073
To find a taste for love
1824
01:48:17,158 --> 01:48:23,538
A taste for love
1825
01:48:52,443 --> 01:48:56,446
Wow. You came.
I can't believe that you came.
1826
01:48:57,489 --> 01:48:59,407
Peter, this is great.
1827
01:48:59,491 --> 01:49:02,119
- It was really funny. Yeah.
- Thank you.
1828
01:49:02,203 --> 01:49:04,929
You know what?
I didn't realize that it was a comedy,
1829
01:49:05,013 --> 01:49:09,400
and then someone told me that, and it
just, like, opened the whole thing up.
1830
01:49:11,128 --> 01:49:14,422
- How long are you in town for?
- Open-ended.
1831
01:49:14,506 --> 01:49:15,548
- Bold.
- Yeah.
1832
01:49:15,633 --> 01:49:17,759
Yeah, you know, I'm kind of
checking out some schools.
1833
01:49:19,762 --> 01:49:22,430
- Congratulations.
- Yeah, maybe.
1834
01:49:25,601 --> 01:49:27,310
You never called.
1835
01:49:28,520 --> 01:49:31,898
You told me not to. And I listened.
1836
01:49:33,025 --> 01:49:35,193
- Right.
- Wasn't easy.
1837
01:49:35,277 --> 01:49:37,737
I might have called once and hung up.
1838
01:49:37,821 --> 01:49:40,365
- No. No.
- From a private number.
1839
01:49:41,158 --> 01:49:42,200
No.
1840
01:49:43,035 --> 01:49:44,077
Maybe.
1841
01:49:44,161 --> 01:49:46,212
MAN 1: Peter!
MAN 2: Nice job, Bretter.
1842
01:49:46,297 --> 01:49:47,864
Well, you should probably go back.
1843
01:49:47,948 --> 01:49:49,916
Would you like to hang out
while you're here?
1844
01:49:50,000 --> 01:49:52,418
- Maybe we could go to dinner or...
- Yeah.
1845
01:49:52,503 --> 01:49:54,754
- Still have my number?
- Yeah. Yeah, I'll call you.
1846
01:49:54,838 --> 01:49:57,507
- Go.
- Yeah, I should do that.
1847
01:49:57,591 --> 01:49:59,509
Yeah, yeah. Go mingle.
1848
01:50:03,497 --> 01:50:05,047
MAN 1: Hey, Peter!
MAN 2: Hey, Bretter!
1849
01:50:05,132 --> 01:50:06,557
Come over here and meet my mom!
1850
01:50:06,642 --> 01:50:09,310
- Go, go.
- Off I go.
1851
01:50:09,395 --> 01:50:11,020
- Hey, Peter.
- Nice job, Bretter.
1852
01:50:11,105 --> 01:50:13,064
The play was sick, man. Good work.
1853
01:50:13,148 --> 01:50:15,316
- Nice job.
- Good job, man. That was awesome.
1854
01:50:15,401 --> 01:50:16,526
So cool!
1855
01:50:16,610 --> 01:50:18,569
Peter, congratulations.
1856
01:50:18,654 --> 01:50:21,715
I just wanted to say thank you.
I had such a great time tonight.
1857
01:50:21,799 --> 01:50:24,575
Oh, good. You know what?
I'm gonna change out of this unitard,
1858
01:50:24,660 --> 01:50:26,894
- 'cause I'm getting a chafe. Okay.
- Enough said.
1859
01:50:26,978 --> 01:50:28,805
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
1860
01:50:54,648 --> 01:50:55,815
Hey, Peter?
1861
01:50:59,153 --> 01:51:02,572
I was just calling you.
1862
01:51:07,911 --> 01:51:10,079
- Wow.
- Oh, Peter.
1863
01:51:10,914 --> 01:51:13,875
- I'm sorry.
- Stop laughing.
1864
01:51:14,918 --> 01:51:17,170
Can you please stop laughing?
1865
01:51:19,298 --> 01:51:20,840
I missed you.
1866
01:51:21,842 --> 01:51:22,925
I just...
1867
01:51:23,010 --> 01:51:27,638
You know, I actually wanted to tell you
that I've been thinking so much about...
1868
01:52:18,148 --> 01:52:22,151
NARRATOR: This fall, Sarah Marshall is back
in a brand-new role.
1869
01:52:22,236 --> 01:52:26,030
Your wife had no enemies
that you're aware of.
1870
01:52:26,156 --> 01:52:28,741
Get ready for the most daring show
on television.
1871
01:52:28,826 --> 01:52:32,161
- Just came home, and she was lying there.
- Right.
1872
01:52:32,246 --> 01:52:35,540
ln a world
where you don't know who to trust.
1873
01:52:39,002 --> 01:52:41,879
Charlie, who's Franco Marconi?
1874
01:52:42,005 --> 01:52:45,049
- No. No.
- Gun, gun, gun, gun. Drop it, drop it.
1875
01:52:45,175 --> 01:52:47,301
Go with your animal instincts.
1876
01:52:51,557 --> 01:52:54,892
- How did you know?
- She's an animal psychic.
1877
01:52:55,894 --> 01:52:59,230
Sarah Marshall returns on Animal Instincts.
1878
01:53:00,023 --> 01:53:01,190
Life's a bitch.
1879
01:53:01,275 --> 01:53:04,152
And where you're going,
that's exactly what you'll be.
1880
01:53:04,177 --> 01:57:08,177
____________ . NVEE ____________
148014