Original subtitles

- YOU'RE FRUSTRATED, AREN'T YOU,

THAT WE HAVEN'T... DONE THE DEED.

- NOBODY'S LOOKING AT THE CALENDAR HERE.

WE ARE A MONTH IN.

SO IF THAT'S ANY SORT OF MILESTONE FOR YOU--

- YOU KNOW IT'S JUST LOGISTICS, RIGHT?

- WE COULD ALWAYS--

- I'M NOT GONNA HAVE SEX IN YOUR PLANE.

- OKAY. PLEASE?

- IT'S NOT SAFE.

- I HAVE AUTOPILOT, PARACHUTES, AND CONDOMS.

IT'S SAFE.

- IT'S GONNA HAPPEN... ON THE GROUND.

AND IT'S GONNA BE MIND-BLOWING.

- MIND-BLOWING, HUH? WAY TO UNDERSELL.

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - WORKING LATE.

UNDER THE HOUSE. GOING THE EXTRA MILE.

- YOU DROPPED YOUR PHONE THROUGH THE HOLE

IN THE KITCHEN FLOOR AGAIN, HUH?

- MAYBE.

HEY, I FOUND THIS OLD-SCHOOL COMB UNDER THERE.

DIBS IF THAT'S COOL.

- ANYTHING YOU FIND UNDER THE HOUSE

YOU CAN KEEP, OKAY?

I TRUST YOU'LL BE DISCRETE ABOUT--

- THE WEIRD NO-SEX THING?

YEAH, I WON'T SAY A WORD.

CLEM, ON THE OTHER HAND, IS A HUGE GOSSIP.

- WHO YOU CALLING A GOSSIP?

- YOU TOLD SHEILA ENZER I GOT WITH HER SISTER.

- SHEILA ASKED ME A DIRECT QUESTION, ALL RIGHT?

I'M NOT GONNA LIE.

THAT WOULD BE A THREAT TO MY SOBRIETY.

- IT'S ALWAYS A THREAT TO YOUR SOBRIETY WHEN IT'S JUICY.

- I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THAT DOUBLES THREE-WAY YOU HAD

WITH THOSE FOLKS DOWN AT THE SURF SHOP, DID I?

- UNBELIEVABLE. - UNBELIEVABLE IS RIGHT!

THOSE FOLKS WERE 45 YEARS OLD.

- WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MOVIE?

- JOFFREY GOT SCARED AND TOSSED HIS SNACK.

- AW, REFLUX, BUDDY? - DIAGNOSED AT TWO.

BUT SYMPTOMS PRESENTED EARLIER.

- IT WASN'T PRETTY. I CAUGHT SOME SNO-CAP SHRAPNEL.

- I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN PLAY IN THE GAME SATURDAY.

MY HEART'S BEATING LIKE A RABBIT.

- YOU CAN'T SKIP ANOTHER BASEBALL GAME.

MAN UP! THE OTHER KIDS ARE TALKING.

- COACH?

- I'LL PUT YOU OUT IN RIGHT FIELD.

I COACH THE VENICE GONDOLIERS.

GOOO GONDOS!

YOU KNOW, I--

- IT USED TO BE MY DAD, BUT HE'S INCARCERATED.

- WELL, I'M SURE HE'S GONNA GET OUT REAL SOON.

- WHY? DID YOU HEAR HE WAS COMING HOME EARLY?

- NO, NO.

WELL, I'M NOT FAMILIAR WITH PARTICULARS OF THIS CASE.

- SHE'S MESSING WITH YOU. - OKAY.

HAZING THE NEW GUY. FAIR ENOUGH.

- CAN WE GO PLAY Wii?

- SURE. - WELL--

- IF MOM'S GOOD WITH THAT. - YEAH.

- BENJAMIN!

APOLOGIES FOR BEING DEBAJO THE HOUSE.

- NO CONOZCO QUE TU HABLAS ESPANOL.

- WHA--WHAT?

HEY, UH, BETWEEN JUST US DUDES...

- COME AGAIN?

- I WANNA TELL YOU SOMETHING BETWEEN JUST US DUDES.

- OH, SURE. YEAH.

- YOU'VE GOT CHARLIE ISSUES.

- SHE'LL WARM UP TO ME.

- SHE DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A FAN.

AND ALEX NEEDS HER TO SIGN OFF

BEFORE THE DEED HAPPENS, YOU KNOW?

30 DAYS.

- HUH.

UM, BETWEEN JUST US DUDES,

YOU GOT KINDA DUSTY ON YOUR LITTLE COMB HUNT.

- SORRY THE WHOLE PLANE SEX THING GOT NEGGED.

- IT'S ALL GOOD.

I STILL GOT A PLANE.

- THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

- BEER?

AND THE COKE? - WHOOPS.

- CLUB SODA.

- OH, UH, SON, NOT TO BE A NUDGE,

BUT REMEMBER I NEED A RIDE TO MY ACTING CLASS TOMORROW NIGHT.

I'M TEACHING AGAIN.

- GARY'LL TAKE YOU.

- YES, OF COURSE I'LL CHAUFFER YOUR DAD.

I'M A CARPENTER'S APPRENTICE.

- EXCELLENT ATTITUDE, GARY.

- THANK YOU, GARY.

- GENTLEMEN, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I'VE BEEN CALLED INTO THE GAME.

- HE'S A 6'4" SHOOTING GUARD.

THE PRIDE OF VENICE OUT OF ITT TECH.

PETE RIGGINS!

- OH, GOD, I WISH THESE JEANS WERE TEAR-AWAY.

HEY.

BUY A GUY A DRINK? - EXCUSE ME?

- FINE, I'LL BUY YOU ONE.

- THOSE ARE KILLER EARRINGS. - THANK YOU.

THOSE ARE KILLER EARRINGS.

- NATALIE.

- HAS HE INVITED YOU TO CHECK OUT THE SUNSET

ON THE ROOF YET?

- THE VIEW, LIKE YOUR EARRINGS, IS KILLER.

CARE TO JOIN ME?

- I'M THE EX.

HE GAMBLED AWAY MY ENGAGEMENT RING.

- IN MY DEFENSE, I HAD NO INTENTION OF MARRYING HER.

SHE'S HOT, BUT BIPOLAR-Y.

YOU, ON THE OTHER HAND, SEEM LIKE A REALLY--

- LATER.

- OH, I FEEL BAD. DO I OWE YOU A SKANK NOW?

- ARE YOU EVER GONNA RETURN MY GREEN SHIRT?

I LOVE THAT SHIRT. - MOLLY SLEEPS ON IT.

- HOW IS MY DOG?

- LOOKS MORE AND MORE LIKE YOU EVERY DAY.

- I HEARD YOU WERE DATING A GUY IN PASADENA.

I DIDN'T EVEN THINK THAT WAS A REAL PLACE.

- YEAH. IT'S FULL OF CHEATING BASTARDS.

JUST LIKE HERE.

- JUST SO YOU KNOW, I NEVER CHEATED ON YOU.

EMOTIONALLY. - MM.

- BUY A GUY A DRINK? - REALLY?

- FINE, I'LL BUY.

- HEARD YOU TURNED DOWN AIRPLANE SEX.

CLEM MENTIONED IT.

- THE WORST PART IS... COMING UP ON A YEAR.

- OH, I'VE GONE A YEAR WITHOUT AIRPLANE SEX.

- NO, NO. NO SEX.

THIS SATURDAY, A YEAR. - WHAT?

IS THAT EVEN SAFE? - IT'S ACTUALLY EXTREMELY SAFE.

- OKAY. YOU NEED TO TAKE SOME ACTION.

- I KEEP TRYING TO, BUT JOFFREY'S KILLING ME.

IT'S LIKE THE THIRD TIME THAT KID'S PUKED ON MY MOJO.

- YOU GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE.

BOOK A HOTEL ROOM. - AN AWAY GAME.

I LIKE IT. I LIKE IT.

- VICEROY'S GOOD. - OR A CUTE BED AND BREAKFAST.

- OH, GOD, NO. ALEX, NOBODY WANTS BANANA--

- PANCAKES! HOW GOOD WOULD THAT BE?

AFTER A NIGHT OF LOVIN'.

- PANCAKES? ALEX, REALLY? THAT'S WHAT YOUR BODY'S CRAVING?

- MOLLY.

- HEY!

WHY ARE YOU IN YOUR CRYING CORNER?

- I CAN'T BELIEVE WE SLEPT TOGETHER.

I'M SO SELF-DESTRUCTIVE.

- WAIT, ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THE SAME LAST NIGHT?

I MEAN, THAT THING YOU DID WHERE YOU LIFTED ME UP,

THAT WAS...INSANE.

I'M FINE.

DON'T FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE TO STAY OR ANYTHING.

- LET'S HAVE DINNER TONIGHT. - YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.

- IT'LL BE GREAT TO CATCH UP.

SWEET.

- HA! HA, HA! MOLLY! MWAH!

DAMN IT! YOU HAD SEX WITH NATALIE.

- WE MAY REKINDLED LAST NIGHT AND ONCE AGAIN THIS MORNING.

COME ON, NOW! - WHOO.

YOU KNOW YOU SWIMMING INTO A RIP CURRENT OF TEARS, RIGHT?

YOU ONLY GO BACK TO HER WHEN YOU'RE IN A BAD PLACE.

- I'M IN A GOOD PLACE.

- IS IT BECAUSE ALEX HAS A BOYFRIEND?

IS IT BECAUSE YOU'RE SMITTEN?

- WHO IS SMITTEN?

- OH, NOBODY. I WAS JUST TRYING OUT A WHITE-PERSON WORD.

SMITTEN.

HA. IT'S NOT FOR ME.

- DOG A NEW HIRE?

- YEAH, THAT'S GARY'S REPLACEMENT.

- ARE YOU GOING TO LOCK HER IN THE PORTA-POTTY

LIKE YOU DID ME ON MY FIRST DAY?

- MOLLY LIVES WITH MY EX-GIRLFRIEND.

- OH, DID WE HAVE DEGRADING SEX WITH THE EX LAST NIGHT?

- DEFINE DEGRADING. MY BAR IS PRETTY HIGH.

- YOU'RE NOT IN A GOOD PLACE. FEELING FAT IN YOUR WET SUIT.

- I HEAR YOU AND THE RED BARON ARE GOING TO A HOTEL ROOM.

- CLEM! - IF I HOLD IT IN, IT FESTERS.

- ACTUALLY, WE'RE GOING TO A BED AND BREAKFAST.

- BAD CALL. - OLD PEOPLE.

- TOO QUAINT.

- WHAT'S THE LATEST ON YOU FIXING MY SINK?

- THE PART IS COMING IN FROM TEMPE...ARIZONA.

- WELL, LET ME KNOW WHEN IT'S IN VENICE...CALIFORNIA.

- SMITTEN.

- I'VE GOT A SURPRISE FOR OUR FRIDAY DATE.

- ME TOO.

- I SHOT AN EMAIL TO CHARLIE,

AND I HOPE I DIDN'T CROSS A LINE HERE,

BUT, UH...I INVITED HER TO HANG OUT WITH US THAT NIGHT.

- THAT'S GONNA BE A LITTLE WEIRD,

'CAUSE I BOOKED US A B&B.

- I LIKE YOUR SURPRISE BETTER.

- WHY WOULD YOU MAKE PLANS WITH CHARLIE?

- WELL, I JUST--I THOUGHT

YOU WANTED ME TO GET TO KNOW HER BETTER BEFORE WE--

- HAVE SEX? THAT'S A LITTLE CREEPY, BEN.

- HA, YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT. I'LL CANCEL ON HER.

I NEVER DO THAT.

- HELLO. WELCOME.

I DON'T MEAN TO BE A DICK. I APPRECIATE THE RIDE.

BUT CLASSES ARE 25 BUCKS A POP.

- 25 BUCKS?

- WELCOME, EVERYONE.

WELCOME TO FORGED BY FIRE, SCENE STUDY WITH WALT RIGGINS.

WHY ARE YOU HERE? - PETE MADE ME.

- SHUT THE DOOR!

MY DRIVER.

YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA BE ACTORS.

AND YOU ARE GOING ON A JOURNEY. A JOURNEY OF A LIFETIME.

AND IT MAY INDEED TAKE A LIFETIME

FOR YOU TO REACH YOUR FULL POTENTIAL...

AS AN ACTOR.

I'M DOING MY BEST WORK NOW AT 53.

WHAT--

WHAT CAN I GIVE YOU?

HERE'S WHAT I CAN GIVE YOU. I CAN GIVE YOU A SAFE SPACE.

A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN GET IN TOUCH...

WITH YOUR ORIGINAL PREMISE.

BECAUSE HERE, PEOPLE--

HERE, IT'S ABOUT YOU.

I'VE GOT A BIG COMMERCIAL AUDITION.

WHO'D LIKE TO RUN LINES WITH ME?

I PREFER A FEMALE.

- OKAY, SO IT'S MY SECOND YEAR OF MEDICAL SCHOOL.

AND, CHARLIE, YOU LIKE GROSS STUFF, RIGHT?

- MM-HMM, I LOVE IT.

- OKAY, GREAT. YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS.

SO, UM, WE'RE STUDDING THE THORACIC WALL.

PERICARDIUM. BLAH, BLAH--BORING STUFF.

BUT I'M PSYCHED BECAUSE WE TOTALLY GET

TO CUT INTO THE HEART. ALL RIGHT?

SO WE CUT AND CUT, AND THEN I HOLD UP, IN MY HAND,

THE HEART OF A FETAL PIG.

HOW COOL IS THAT?

- YOU KILLED A PIG?

- NO, NO, IT WAS ALREADY DEAD. - IS THAT WHAT "FETAL" MEANS?

- NO, NO, "FETAL" IS LIKE A BABY, ONLY YOUNGER...

THAT'S BEEN TAKEN FROM IT'S MOM'S--

I KNEW I SHOULD'VE GONE WITH THE STORY ABOUT THE FLIP PHONE

THAT I FOUND IN THAT GUY'S... ANUS.

NO, NOT RIGHT EITHER.

- SOMEWHERE BETWEEN DEAD PIG AND THIS FELLOW'S ANUS.

THAT'S WHERE YOU WANNA BE. BUT YOU'LL GET IT.

AAH! OH, MY GOD!

CAN YOU SEE IF MY--

- WELL, I'M LEAVING RIGHT NOW. OKAY.

OH, MY-- AH, NO.

I WAS JUST ABOUT TO CALL YOU.

I GOT A CRISIS ON THE JOB.

- WE DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS.

- NO. NO, NO, NO. DON'T...GO TO THE CORNER.

- IF YOU'RE SEEING SOMEONE ELSE, JUST SAY IT.

'CAUSE I WILL FIND OUT.

- I AM NOT SEEING ANYONE ELSE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING SATURDAY? YOU WANNA DO BEACH DAY?

I WOULD'VE BEEN HERE SOONER,

BUT IT'S HARD TO RIDE YOUR BIKE

WHEN YOU'RE DRINKING A MILKSHAKE.

TOSS THAT FOR ME?

- CRACKERJACK JOB ON THE SINK, THERE, BUDDY.

WHAT TIME'S THE STOVE SET TO DETONATE?

- THIS BABY JUST CAME IN FROM TEMPE.

- LIAR. YOU FORGOT TO ORDER IT.

- CLEM TOLD YOU? - NO, YOU JUST DID.

- DAMN IT. - REALLY? A MOTORCYCLE.

- TOO TOP GUN FOR YOU? - I LOVE MOTORCYCLES.

- NO, YOU DON'T. - MOST WOMEN DO.

- NO, THEY DON'T.

- HAD A GUY COME INTO THE E.R. MOTORCYCLE CRASH.

LOST ALL HIS SKIN. YOU COULD SEE HIS FEMUR.

- BEN.

OKAY, EXCELLENT ASSISTING, CHUCK.

THANK YOU.

- NICE WING.

- I WAS ALL CITY, VENICE HIGH.

CLASS OF '96. ASTERISK GED.

- HOW WE DOING IN HERE? - WE NEED A PITCHER.

THE COACH IS SUPPOSED TO DO IT, BUT MOM KEEP BEANING THE KIDS.

- YEAH, THEY KEEP CROWDING THE PLATE.

- SO HOW ABOUT COMING TO MY GAME TOMORROW?

- SURE.

I KEEP PULLING A LOT OF BALLS FOUL.

- WELL, YOU'RE PROBABLY STEPPING INTO THE BUCKET.

- I MIGHT BE ABLE TO HELP.

LED THE IVIES IN RBIs.

POWER FROM BOTH SIDES OF THE PLATE.

- SWITCH HITTER. NO COMMENT, TOO EASY.

- YOU PLAYED BASEBALL AT DARTMOUTH?

- WELL, WHEN I WASN'T CHUGGING NATTY LIGHTS

IN THE BASEMENT OF CHI GAM.

- CHI GAM?

I FEEL LIKE I WENT THERE FOR A WINTER CARNIVAL

AND THEY HAD FLOODED THE BASEMENT.

- AND TURNED IT INTO AN ICE RINK.

- YES! THAT'S SO CRAZY!

- I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WERE THERE.

- I WAS.

I MEAN, I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING.

- A WORD, PLEASE. - I'M KINDA BUSY RIGHT NOW.

- IT'LL JUST TAKE A MINUTE.

- YOU'RE WELCOME.

THE WHOLE FAKE GEYSER THING TO SAVE YOU FROM THE HORRIBLE DATE.

- HEY, YOU'RE DELUSIONAL.

AND YOU'RE NOT PULLING OFF THAT JACKET.

- I THINK WE BOTH KNOW THAT'S A LIE.

- OH, AND BY THE BY, HE'S NOT A CLOSER.

YEAH, NO, I'M NOT FEELING HIM

- OH, IT'S GONNA HAPPEN.

- I CAN'T HEAR YOU. - SEX WITH BEN WILL HAPPEN.

AND IT'LL PROBABLY BE AMAZING.

- DAMN, I FLOODED IT.

- PROBABLY BE AMAZING?

WHEN DID WE DOWNGRADE TO "PROBABLY"?

- A LITTLE RESPECT.

A CLIENT IS TALKING TO HER CONTRACTOR.

WHAT'S UP, BABE? - STAY OUT OF MY SEX LIFE.

- WHAT SEX LIFE?

- OH!

- UGH!

ARE YOU AIMING AT THIS?

- WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M DOING WRONG?

- PITCHING. - BEN HAD A TOUGH NIGHT.

- ARE YOU OFF BEN? - NO.

HE TRIED TO WOW CHARLIE WITH THIS MED SCHOOL STORY

THAT ENDS UP IN THIS WEIRD PIG ABORTION AREA.

- HMM.

YOU KNOW WHO'S GREAT WITH CHARLIE?

- WHY ARE YOU OBSESSED WITH PETE?

- LOOK AT HIM, HE'S INCREDIBLE.

WHAT A SPECIMEN.

OKAY, HE'S NOT DOING HIMSELF ANY FAVORS RIGHT NOW.

- HEY, RIGGINS!

THAT'S A HOSE, NOT AN OUTDOOR SHOWER.

JUST...RIDICULOUS!

- I'LL SHOOT YOU AN ESTIMATE.

- THANK YOU.

WENT VERY WELL, GARY.

VERY WELL.

- OH, LAWRENCE.

IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE WEARING? NO, I'M JUST KIDDING.

YOU CARRY IT OFF.

TO THE XTERRA.

- HEY, ARE YOU UP?

ARE YOU AUDITIONING?

- OH, NO, NO, HE'S MY DRIVER. - I'M A CARPENTER.

- APPRENTICE.

- A GENUINE CARPENTER. - APPRENTICE.

- HMM, HE'S YOUNG, BUT A DIFFERENT WAY TO GO.

DO YOU HAVE A SECOND TO COME TALK WITH US?

- SURE.

- UM...UM...

COME TO THINK OF IT,

I CAN DO IT WITHOUT THE, UH, SOUTHERN TWANG.

I DON'T--UM, YOU KNOW, WE HAVE TO GET GOING.

- GOT YOUR TEXT. WHAT'S GOING ON?

- HE WAS CRYING, SO I FELT WEIRD JUST LEAVING HIM.

- HA, 45 YEARS...

I HAVE HONED MY CRAFT, AND THEY GIVE IT TO THAT KID?

I MEAN, WHAT'S HE DONE? - NOTHING.

- NO-THING!

BUT THE CHORUS. CHORUS.

- DAD, YOU WANNA SWITCH TO BEER?

YOU KNOW, IT'S 1:00 p.m.

- GET THAT... GINGER JUDAS OUT OF HERE PLEASE.

- I FEEL LIKE MAYBE I MESSED UP A LITTLE BIT.

- NO, YOU NAILED IT.

- WELL, THIS IS TECHNICALLY OVERTIME.

BUT THAT'S A MONDAY DISCUSSION.

IT'S WHAT YOU DO, YOU KNOW.

- THIEF.

- REMEMBER THAT TIME I VISITED YOU

ON THE SET OF CHINA BEACH?

- I PLAYED A BLIND MECHANIC.

- THEY ASKED YOU BACK FOR SIX EPISODES.

- THERE WOULD'VE BEEN MORE BUT DANA DELANY AND I

HAD A THING.

IT NEVER CONSUMMATED, BUT IT DISTRACTED HER.

- MM.

I HAVE A TON OF MEMORIES LIKE THAT.

- AH, THANKS FOR TRYING TO BUCK ME UP, SON,

BUT, YOU KNOW, I DON'T NEED TO BE LED DOWN MEMORY LANE.

- REMEMBER HERMAN'S HEAD?

- THANK YOU. I DO.

- CRAP, DAD. I GOTTA GO TO CHARLIE'S GAME.

BUT WE'RE GONNA HANG WHEN I GET BACK, OKAY?

- OKAY, BUT, HEY, DON'T GET THROWN OUT.

REMEMBER, YOU USED TO ALWAYS GET THROWN OUT.

- I DO.

- YEAH, YOU'D COME HOME. YOU WERE ALL...

JUST FRUSTRATED.

YOUR EYES WERE ALL RED.

- WELL, I WAS HIGH, DAD, YOU KNOW.

I WAS ALWAYS HIGH.

- REMEMBER THAT TIME I PLAYED

THAT DRUG ADDICT ON PICKET FENCES?

- YEAH. YEAH, NO, I DO.

- THAT'S IT, GUYS.

THAT'S THE WAY WE DO IT, ALL RIGHT.

ALL THE WAY LEFT, BUDDY. LET'S GO!

- LET'S GO, LOOK SHARP!

- ALL RIGHT, GONDOLIERS, WE GOT TWO DOWN, TWO DOWN!

NICE SNAG ON THAT ONE-HOPPER, CHARLIE, ALL RIGHT?

HEY, JOFFREY.

IT'S JUST A GNAT, OKAY? HANG IN THERE, ALL RIGHT?

- THAT'LL BE ALL, BEN.

HERE COMES THE HEAT. - I GOT THIS.

WHY DON'T YOU GO LOOK FOR A HAIRBRUSH

UNDERNEATH THE BLEACHERS, HUH?

- IT'S THE FIFTH INNING.

- HEY, I HAD A CRISIS WITH MY DAD.

DID YOU GET MY TEXT? - LIAR.

- I SWEAR TO-- I TEXTED YOU.

EVER SINCE MY PHONE DROPPED UNDER THE HOUSE,

IT'S BEEN ACTING SKETCHY. JUST GIVE ME THE ROCK.

- HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING? - NOPE.

- SERIOUSLY. - ONE BEER.

AND ANOTHER ONE AFTER THAT. BUT I'M GOOD.

- OH, HE'S MUSCLE MEMORIZED THE DUI TEST.

YEAH, LET'S PUT HIM AROUND KIDS.

- IF ANYTHING, I'M LOOSER.

LOOK, GUYS, I DIDN'T EVEN DO--

UH-OH. - FORGET ABOUT OUR DATE?

HMM?

YOUR DAD TOLD ME YOU WERE HERE.

- MOM, WHAT'S GOING ON? - I GOT THIS, CHARLIE.

WHAT IS GOING ON?

- DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. - DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT?

WHO'S DAISY DUKE? - WHAT'D YOU SAY TO ME?

- THAT SOUNDED MOSTLY LIKE A COMPLIMENT TO ME.

I WAS--

- IS THIS THE EMERGENCY YOU HAD LAST NIGHT?

- I HAD TO FIX A PIPE.

- NOW YOU'RE PITCHING AT HER KID'S GAME.

YOU BASTARD! - HEY, HEY, HEY!

- LOOKED WORSE THAN IT WAS. WEARING FLIP-FLOPS!

- COULD YOU GUYS PLEASE TAKE YOUR DOMESTIC DISPUTE

OFF THE FIELD.

- I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE BANGING ANOTHER CLIENT.

- WHAT? GOD, NO!

- I'M NOT HAVING SEX WITH HER. AND JUST "NO" IS FINE.

- WHO'S BANGING WHO?

- NOTHING BUT EAR, NOTHING BUT EAR.

- COME ON, MOLLY. LET'S GO.

- SHE SEEMS GREAT.

- CAN SOMEBODY JUST PITCH, PLEASE?

- GIVE HIM THE ROCK. NOW.

- HIT THE SHOWERS, MATE.

TWO DOWN, GONDOLIERS! TWO DOWN!

LET'S GO, LET'S LOOK SHARP!

- YOU THREW A NO-HITTER.

EVEN AGAINST KIDS, THAT'S STILL PRETTY HOT.

YEAH, WELL, I JUST WANNA THANK GOD,

MY TEAMMATES.

ESPECIALLY JOFFREY.

- DID IT FOR THE SEX, DIDN'T YOU?

- WE ARE 36 DAYS IN. I WOULD'VE BOUGHT CHARLIE A CAR.

- SHE'S AT SCREWSIE'S.

HOLD THAT THOUGHT.

- EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?

- YEAH, IT'S JUST A TEXT FROM PETE.

- ON A SATURDAY NIGHT?

- ACTUALLY IT'S FROM THIS AFTERNOON.

HIS PHONE'S SKETCHY.

- IS THERE SOMETHING GOING ON WITH YOU GUYS?

- WHAT?

- WELL, HIS EX SEEMS TO THINK SO.

- WHO CARES WHAT SHE THINKS?

DID YOU SEE THAT BODY BY THE WAY?

IT'S, LIKE, SO LEAN. WHAT DO YOU EVEN HOLD ONTO...

OTHER THEN THE BIG BOOBS?

- YOU DIDN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION.

- I'M NOT INTO PETE.

ARE WE GONNA DO THIS, OR WHAT?

- CALL ME TOMORROW.

- SERIOUSLY?

- AND THEN SHE SLAPPED ME.

I DON'T KNOW, NATALIE AND I TOGETHER ARE JUST CHAOS.

AND...THAT'S NOT A GOOD RIDE FOR ME ANYMORE.

SO I THOUGHT I SHOULD COME TO A MEETING.

UH-OH.

PIPE WRENCH, PLEASE.

IT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE. PINOT, PLEASE.

- IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT. I WENT A YEAR WITHOUT SEX.

- OH, THAT CAN'T BE SAFE.

- IT'S ACTUALLY EXTREMELY SAFE.

IT SUCKS.

- YOU KNOW, MOST OF THE TIME

I'M A PRETTY GOOD INFLUENCE ON CHUCK.

- YEAH, YOU SHOULD OPEN A CHARTER SCHOOL.

- SHE'S MORE RESILIENT THAN YOU THINK.

- YOU'RE TELLING ME ABOUT MY KID?

- JUST ONE CONTRACTOR'S OPINION.

- HOW COME YOU CAN'T GO TEN SECONDS

WITHOUT SAYING SOMETHING ANNOYING?

- YOU INSPIRE ME.

PIPE'S DONE.

- DID YOU FIX IT RIGHT THIS TIME?

WASN'T EVEN BROKEN.

- WHAT? REALLY?

- REALLY.

IT'S ALMOST AS IF SOMEONE CALLED ME AT MIDNIGHT

WITH...ULTERIOR MOTIVES.

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT BEN?

- WHAT?

- I WORKED HERE FOR, LIKE, A WEEK.

YOU NEVER TALKED ABOUT HIM. - NEVER CAME UP.

- WHO'S THE LIAR NOW?

- NO! GOD, NO.

- JUST "NO" IS FINE.

- I JUST CAN'T-- - YOU WANT TO, BUT CAN'T.

NO, I GET IT.

- NO, GET OVER YOURSELF. THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID.

I WAS CHEATED ON, AND I'M NOT GONNA CHEAT ON BEN.

- SO IF BEN WASN'T IN THE PICTURE?

- JUST TAKE THE NO.

- SOUNDS LIKE A NO WITH AN ASTERISK.

- IT'S NOT. - LIKE A DIPLOMA.

- NO, I'M NOT INTERESTED.

- TEXT ME LATER WHEN YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND.

- NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

- MY PHONE'S STILL SKETCHY.

SO DON'T FREAK IF I TAKE A WHILE TO HIT YOU BACK.

- WOW.

- DAMN IT! I FLOODED IT.

- HA, LOOK AT THEM.

- AND THE DIRECTOR SAID I MIGHT EVEN GET A TRAILER.

- WOW.

- THOSE TWO ARE SMITTEN.

SMITTEN.

I LIKE IT NOW.

- YOU'RE SO FUNNY.

- WHAT--WHAT THE HELL?

- THAT'S FOR GOLDEN STATE HARDWARE, BITCH!

- REALLY?