Original subtitles

♪ Yeah, feel me ♪

♪ Yo, come on ♪

♪ It's your homeboy Preach

in the building ♪

♪ And we vibing ♪

♪ And we having

a real good time ♪

♪ Sing for me, girl ♪

(Woman):

♪ Gonna have a good time ♪

♪ Ain't gonna worry today ♪

♪ Let the sun shine

on my smile ♪

♪ Hope you can come my way ♪

♪ Gonna have a good time ♪

♪ Ain't gonna worry today ♪

♪ Let the sun shine

on my smile ♪

♪ Hope you can come my way ♪

(Man): ♪ OK, yeah ♪

♪ You and I, we could

rule the world ♪

♪ Spend the most paper

Kiss all of the pretty girls ♪

♪ It takes belief

in your one self ♪

♪ That's more powerful

than anything ♪

♪ You pull out

your one belt ♪

- Hi! Bye!

Super late.

- Wait! I forgot

to make you lunch.

- No, I have history!

I gotta get a good seat.

- You want history,

check this out!

- ...Ontario, where

General Vladekh Komenkho

was caught hiding in what

appears to be pig's manure.

- Oh, that's gross!

- World's most feared tyrant,

in his day,

as was his father.

- General Komenkho

vanished a decade ago

during a global initiative

to end his reign of terror.

- OK, gotta go!

- No, no! Lunch!

- Mom, you gotta

stop doing this, OK?

I'm not a kid.

You're smothering me!

- Ta-ta-ta, ta-ta!

Don't forget

to wear your helmet!

- Yeah, yeah!

Don't worry!

♪ Let the sun shine

on my smile ♪

♪ Hope you can come my way ♪

♪ Gonna have a good time ♪

♪ Ain't gonna worry today ♪

♪ Let the sun shine

on my smile ♪

♪ Hope you can come my way ♪

- The 3rd Canadian Division had

penetrated deeper into France

than the British

or American troops

and overcome greater resistance

than any other beachhead,

except Omaha Beach.

Now turn to page 69.

- (Whispering): This is crossing

into creepy territory, Jake.

(Sighing)

- Oh, that's good!

I gotta get that.

- Let me know when you start

collecting her fingernails

and used tissues.

(Speaking German)

- So, instead of learning,

Mr. Bouchard would rather draw

pretty pictures of fair damsels.

(Students laughing)

Mr. Bouchard, me thinks

you would be better served

taking notes

than sketching portraits.

- (Whispering):

Me thinks old people

should be seen

and not heard.

(Laughing)

- Mr. Bernstein?

- Sir, yes, sir!

(Whistle blowing)

I asked my mom to give me

a note to skip this class,

but: "No! Exercise

is good for you!

"It'll help build

your muscles."

What muscles?

I have the muscles of a guy

who spent too much time...

- Whoa! 63.8 miles per hour!

New high school record!

- Hello! Earth to Jake!

Why don't you just put

us both out of our misery

and ask Angie out?

- Ask her out?

What are you, nuts?

I grew up with her.

I've known her since I was 4.

- Even better!

It'd be like dating

your own sister,

in not a creepy-dating-your-

own-sister kind of way.

- What? No! Forget it. I...

(Sighing)

I haven't talked

to her in years.

She won't even...

notice me.

- You can start by

developing a personality.

- I have a personality.

- "Moody loner" is a red flag,

not a personality.

- Shut up!

- Craig's throwing this

huge party tonight!

Ask her to go with you.

(Sighing)

- No, I can't.

- Why not?

(Breathing heavily)

- That is why not:

Todd Tomzak.

- You guys ready?

- You ever see

that guy play football?

He's like a human

killer machine.

- "Human Killer Machine"?

That's a good name

for a band.

♪♪ You've been blackmailed ♪

You see that?

She cold-shouldered Todd!

♪ You tried to be a superstar ♪

♪ Didn't work

You went way too far ♪

♪ Next time, listen to me ♪♪

- Jake?

- Hey, Angie!

Oh, no, no, no!

Please, keep it!

- I'm not really

hungry, so...

Um, so, earlier,

in Sterning's class,

that was me, right,

in the...that picture?

- Uh...

You know what?

It's funny that you act--ask me

that, actually, because, um...

Yeah.

(Chuckling)

- Um, can I see it?

- Yeah, yeah!

Uh, sorry. Um...

Um, here.

(Chuckling)

Wow! This is, um...

This is really good.

- You think so?

- Yeah. Can I keep this?

- Yeah, sure. Totally!

Uh... You really

like that?

- Well, I mean, it's--

it's no Picasso, but...

- Well, that's because

all of your body parts

are in the right place,

or so I assume.

Uh...

- Um...

- Yeah.

Uh, speaking of body parts

being in their right place,

you probably shouldn't tell

Todd where you got that.

- Todd? Oh, we broke up,

like, 2 weeks ago.

- Does he know that?

Just because on the field

earlier, he seemed really...

- Oh, um, yeah, you know,

he's been trying to get me back,

but I'm not interested.

- Really? Really...

(Clears throat)

Angie, you know, uh, Craig is

having this big party tonight.

And I know this is

really late notice,

and I'm sure you have

plans with your peeps,

'cause you probably

have peeps,

but I was wondering if...

- Are you asking me

out on a date?

- You're right.

That was a stupid idea.

Shouldn't have done it.

Why ruin our friendship, right?

- I mean, we haven't

really been friends

since we were 4 years old.

- You're right.

But something like

this could ruin it

for, like, another

13 years, so, I...

- Um, how about you,

uh, pick me up? 8:00?

- Wha... Really?

- Yeah, 8:00. Does that

work for you?

- Yeah. 8:00 is good.

8:00 works.

- OK. I will

see you at 8:00.

- Yeah.

- Um, Picasso, you are

cute when you're confident.

- Uh... Confident. Got it!

- OK!

- So, how did it go?

Did she reject you?

- What? I...

She said yes, man.

I mean...

- You're kidding!

♪♪ I'm headed up ♪

♪ Hit it up

Hit it up ♪

♪ Hit it up

Hit it up ♪

♪ Hit it up

Hit it up, up ♪

♪ I'm headed up ♪

♪ Live it up

Live it ♪

♪ Live it up

Live it up ♪♪

- (Man on TV): I have

brought peace to a nation

that was racked by civil war.

- What can you about the

thousands of civilians

that you had executed?

- It is a lie. That is a lie!

All of that is a lie!

All of you, that is a lie!

Your accusations... Ah! Uh...

- Mr. Komenkho,

are you all right?

- It's a heart attack!

- Jakey, is that you?

- Yeah, it's me!

- It looks like Ge--

- I've been home for an hour!

Where have you been?

- Sorry, I was getting ready.

What do you think?

- Very handsome.

Thank you for remembering.

- Remembering what?

- About tonight.

(Scoffing)

- What are you

talking about?

- Second and last Friday

of every month:

dinner with Grandpa.

- No. No, no, no.

Not tonight.

- Why not tonight?

- I have a date tonight.

- You can see Wendell

another time.

- It's not with Wendell.

It's with a girl!

Please don't laugh.

- Sorry.

Seriously,

who's it with?

- You know her.

Angie Wagner.

- Little Angie Wagner?

How is she?

- She's a hard 10.

That's how she is.

And I'm like a soft 6.

- Seven.

- If I blow her off,

she'll never talk to me.

- Grandpa only gets out of

that awful old-folks home

twice a month

for dinner with us.

- We can do it tomorrow night.

Any other night. Please!

- No, no, no! Twice

a month, no cancelling.

Old people need consistency,

otherwise they get confused.

- He's already confused.

He thinks he's being watched.

- Being in the armed forces

has made Grandpa a little...

- Crazy?

- Jake Bouchard!

You can see little

Angie Wagner afterwards.

Your dad's here

with Grandpa.

- Yay!

- Be nice.

- So, what tall tales is Grandpa

gonna tell us tonight, huh?

Nazi zombies?

Communist garden gnomes?

- They were suspicious-looking

garden gnomes.

- Yeah, 'cause in this house,

that's totally normal.

Hey, Dad, what's

Grandpa doing?

- Oh, you know, there is

a van parked by the Grossbergs,

and he won't

get out of the car

because he thinks

it's a surveillance van.

- Are the Grossbergs

having a circumcision?

- Jake, cover the TV, oh,

and the--the--the blinds.

- Blinds.

- Blinds.

- (Whispering): I can't

believe we still do this.

- The televisions are covered?

- They sure are!

- The one in the kitchen too?

- Yep!

- Well...

That, uh, surveillance

truck finally moved.

- Yeah, of course, Dad.

- Hi, son!

- Hi!

- Let's eat.

- Let's do it!

- OK...

(Slowly): Are you enjoying

your chicken, Dad?

- Yes.

- OK.

- Did I ever tell you

that Sanders, right,

he was the worst cook

our unit had.

- You knew Colonel

Sanders, Grandpa?

- Are you kidding?

You know, during the

Second Occupation of Cuba,

Private Sanders, he used to

shovel mule poop, right?

So, there was no, "Finger

lickin' good," you know?

Trust me!

And, um, basically,

I kind of invented the style

of Kentucky Fried Chicken.

- Hmm! Here we go...

- Me and my men...

Not my men,

a special unit I had.

We called them

Devil's Scum, right?

We decided we were gonna

ambush this supply truck.

It was right off

the coast of, uh, Cuba.

It was right off

the shores there.

So, we go hit it.

Right? Nothing in it.

But the cab was

full of chickens.

We're starving

to death, right?

So, I tell Sanders:

"Hey, get that spice rack!"

I said: "Throw them

in there," right?

So 13 spices

and, uh, herbs later,

history was

being cooked!

- (Jake): Hmm...

You know, on the box here,

it says 11 secret

herbs and spices.

- Jake...

- No, he is correct.

Sanders took out one herb

and one spice, so that's 11.

And that's why I don't get one

royalty out of the whole deal.

- You know what?

Can we spend a little

more time eating

and a little less time

in fantasy land?

- Jake Michael Bouchard! Shhh!

(Sighing)

I'm sorry, Dad.

Jake's anxious because

he has a date tonight.

- Oh.

- Really?

Like, with a girl, or...

- Why is that so...

- Hatch yourself

a little hot chick?

- Yes, actually.

- Anxious to get out...

- Mom!

- Dad...

- OK. All right.

Listen. You have

some protection?

- Mom!

- Dad!

- What the heck!

What's the matter?

What? Are you ashamed?

Is there something

to be ashamed about that?

(Groaning)

- (Jake's mom):

Well, that was awful.

- Mom, he's nuts!

He lives in a fantasy

world, and you guys...

He's doing it again!

He thinks the house

is full of microphones.

He's putting Xs all over

the wall. It looks awful!

- I expect you to

offer him a full apology

when you drive him

to the nursing home.

- Drive him? No,

I'm not doing that.

I gotta take Angie!

- Your dad and I

are going to the airport.

I still have a

million things to pack.

- He's gonna ruin my date

before it even starts!

- You're the only one

who can do it,

and you know your

grandpa won't take a taxi.

(Sighing)

- Could we FedEx him?

Look, Angie,

I am so sorry.

I had no idea this

was happening tonight.

- It's fine.

It's nice that you

and your grandpa are close.

- Are you sure you're OK

to get to the party?

- Yes, totally! It's fine.

I'll meet you there.

- OK, great! Hey, try not to

have too much fun without me.

- OK, well,

no promises, Picasso.

- OK, bye.

♪ ♪ ♪

- Hey, Grandpa, I just

wanted to, um, apologize

for what happened

at dinner.

Tonight means a lot

to me, and I, uh...

I didn't mean to dis you--

disrespect you.

(♪ Cell ringing ♪)

- We getting hit

or something?

- Hello?

- Hey, Picasso!

Guess what? My ride died on me.

It's leaking oil or something.

- Yeah? Are you, uh, you OK?

- Uh, yeah. I took a shortcut

and ended up on Rambler Street,

right in front of the old

abandoned sock factory, so...

Not the best neighbourhood

to be stuck in.

Can you, uh, pick me up?

- Um... You know what?

I actually still have to

drop my grandfather off.

Could you give me,

like, uh, 30 minutes?

- I can call Todd.

He's got a full set of tools.

- No! No, no, no!

No, no, no!

I'll, uh...

I'll be there.

Just, um...

Just don't move.

(Sirens wailing in distance)

- Ah, that's my boy!

Battle of the Bulge, huh?

- Mmm... OK,

you know what, Grandpa?

When Angie gets in the car,

I need you to

just not talk. OK?

I just need you to be

my normal grandfather,

like everybody else's

normal grandfather.

Just for, like,

a few minutes. Please.

(Siren wailing)

Grandpa, do you hear me?

- Uh, yeah, normal, uh...

normal grandfather.

- International reaction

to Krakhovian warlord

Vladekh Komenkho's

sudden death is mixed.

French president

Jacques Dum...

- Komenkho, man.

I knew his father.

He was a terrible dresser, man,

but he had some

nice teeth, but, you know...

- This is where

she said she was.

- You sure about that?

- Yeah.

Yeah, there's

the old sock factory.

OK, let me call her.

(Line ringing)

(Cell ringing in distance)

What are you...

(Whispering): Oh God!

(Insects chirring)

(Ringing)

- This her phone?

- Yeah, it is.

Hmm... She must have

called the Auto Club,

and then dropped it somehow

when they picked her up.

(Sniffing)

- Yeah, here.

Hmm. Perfume...

(Sniffing)

...gasoline...

(Sniffing)

...and manure.

- What does manure

have to do with finding...

What are you doing?

- Looking for

footprints.

Ah, there's more

than one of them too.

That's not good.

- What is that stuff?

- It's called luminol, kid.

Hey! Hey, where are you going?

Grand--

Grandpa!

- Over here!

- Crazy old man.

Hey! What are

you doing?

You can't just wander off

like that, all right?

- What are these

tire tracks doing here?

- Who cares?

- These are

Goodyear EV330s.

Issued to government

vehicles only!

The same ones were

on the ambulance

and the SUV that

passed us earlier.

- OK. So, they're EV 30...

whatevers. Can we go now?

- I think your girlfriend

got herself mixed up

in something really bad.

- For the last time, Grandpa...

- Really bad.

- ...she's not

my girlfriend,

and if I don't

get to that party,

she never will be, OK?

OK...

- What are you doing?

- Calling Wendell.

He's at the party. He's gonna

tell me that Angie is there.

- Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Wait a minute.

I'll tell you what:

If she is at the party,

you take me to the home,

feed me a tuna-fish sandwich,

pat me on the head,

and we're done!

If she's not there,

we do things my way.

Deal?

- Fine.

- Not fine, "deal."

- Deal.

(Line ringing)

- Yellow!

- Wendell! Are you at

the party? Is Angie there?

- No, she isn't.

Craig's folks didn't leave town.

Party's cancelled.

- What, are you

serious? Wha...

Do you--do you know

where she could be?

- I've got more

important things to do

than survey the whereabouts

of your girlfriend.

- She's not my

girlfriend, man, OK?

I'll talk

to you later.

(Whistling)

- Let's go!

- Where are we? And what

are we doing here?

- It's an underground

arms dealer.

These guys may

help us figure out

where they took your girlfriend.

- Yep, whatever

you say, Grandpa.

- You know what this is?

This is a spent shell from

a Tokarev automatic handgun.

- Where'd you get that?

- The ambulance tire tracks.

We're right there. Let's go.

(Sighing)

(Clanging sound,

cat meowing)

- What's the

password?

- The moon landing

was a fake.

(Man shouting, indistinct)

- (Man): Automatics

on this side.

Pack 'em up over there!

OK, close this one up.

- Don't touch

that, kid.

Those are MID 69

super-EX mines.

Unless you'd like to be

barbecued to a crisp.

Boom!

(Laughing)

- Come in!

(Engine revving in distance)

Have a seat.

- Thank you.

(Lou grunting)

- So, what can I

do for you?

- Um...

You ever seen

any of these before?

- You a cop?

- Uh, military intelligence.

- Your kid?

- Grandson.

- Hello!

- Let me see that.

Tokarev, 7.6 mm.

Hmm. Nothing new.

- Did you unload

any of those lately?

- What's it to you?

- Well, you see,

my grandson here,

his, uh, girlfriend

got kidnapped

and, uh, I found that

right at the place

where we believe

she got taken.

- And why

should I care?

- Well, because in

about 10 seconds,

I'm gonna take down

this big gorilla of yours,

put the other goon away

and put this one in a coma.

Then when I ask you

the question again,

you'll be in

a world of hurt.

(Snorting, laughing)

(All laughing)

- You know what I think?

- No.

- I think you

should play nice

and go home

with your grandson.

- Grandpa?

- OK.

See, I'll bet that

you're thinking:

"Who is this old man

standing in front of me

"who's not afraid?"

Am I right?

(Snorting)

And you're

also thinking,

"What does this guy know

that makes him so fearless?

"He's crazy," right?

That's what most people

think: "He's crazy!"

But then again,

maybe he's

not so crazy.

Maybe he knows exactly...

what he's doing.

- All right, enough.

- Ah!

- Holy!

(Grunting)

(Chuckling nervously)

- (Man 1): Help the boss!

- (Man 2): Come on!

- Tell 'em to put them down.

- Put your guns down.

- Get up.

On the ground, boys.

Don't move anywhere.

Come here.

Now I'm gonna

ask you that question:

Did you move any

of those shells lately?

- Um, just last week, buyers

from out of town wanted some.

- And?

- And they took full crates of

automatics and weapons and ammo.

- You wouldn't happen to know,

uh, anybody's name, would you?

- No, uh, some mercenary

from "Krishkrash." I don't know.

- Krakhovians?

- Yeah.

- Komenkho.

- Mm-hmm.

- The guy from the news?

- Son, you stay right behind me.

Boys, face the

other way and walk.

Don't look back.

Just keep walking.

Come on.

- Police! Everybody,

hands where we can see them!

- (Man): Hands in the air!

Hands in the air! Don't move!

- Sir, please

put your weapon down.

- Leave those two alone!

These...are "friendlies."

Good evening,

Major Crawford.

- How you been?

- Meh.

- Hey! You're the rabbi that...

- Mr. Bouchard...

I'm Captain Steinberg

with ASPIC.

Well, one might wonder

why we should find you here.

This is very unexpected.

- I want to talk

to Maddy Harcourt.

- Who's Harcourt?

- She's waiting for you.

Please, follow me.

- Come on, let's

follow protocol.

(Tires screeching)

♪ ♪ ♪

- Take off the cuffs.

Please leave us.

Mr. Bouchard...

- Oh, please, call me

Jake, or Jakey.

My grandpa

calls me Jakey.

Um, where is

my grandfather?

- Don't worry,

Mr. Bouchard. He's close.

I'm an old friend of his.

Madeleine Harcourt.

Your grandfather and I

served together.

- Oh. Uh, were you

one of the Devil's Scum?

- Excuse me?

- The Devil's Scum,

uh, Grandpa's old

special forces unit.

- He told you he was

in a special forces unit?

- Oh, I--I won't,

like, say anything.

I'll--I'll keep it

to myself, I promise. Shhh!

- Uh, Mr. Bouchard, what else

did your grandfather tell you?

(Scoffing)

- Uh, where

do I start? Uh...

Let's see... He told me

about North Korea.

He told me about Mao

and how that Argo movie

was all wrong or something.

Uh, what are you guys

doing about Angie?

- Angie?

- Yeah, she's my--

Uh, we were supposed

to pick up a girl.

Her car broke down.

And then we got there.

She wasn't.

Grandpa thinks she's

mixed up in something,

she was kidnapped.

(Inhaling deeply)

- Mr. Bouchard, did your

grandfather ever mention to you

that he received a Section 8

from the military?

- Uh, I don't understand.

- Your grandfather hasn't been

on the active-duty

roster since 2005.

He was found

mentally incompetent.

- But he's not ment--

- Perhaps it was stress.

Maybe shell shock.

We had him on desk duty

for a few years,

but sometimes an idea pops into

his head and he runs with it

without realizing

how insane the idea is.

It's actually quite impressive

how detailed the fantasy world

is he can create.

- OK. But what about Angie?

She's still missing.

- You don't know where she is.

Doesn't mean she's missing.

We'll look into it.

I'm sure she's fine.

-I... The--the--

the shell casings!

He found 2 shell casings

at the place

she was supposed to be.

- Did you happen to see him

pick up those shell casings?

- Well, no.

- Part of your

grandfather's dementia

is that he collects all sorts

of odd bits of military junk:

spent shells, old scraps

of enemy uniforms...

He's probably been carrying

those shell casings around

for the last 20 years.

- So, he didn't lead

a raid on Mao's villa?

The French Foreign Legion,

the--the affair

with the double agent...

- All fantasies.

- Ah! I mean...

Wait. No, no, no!

He took down that big guy

at the garage where

the rabbi picked us up.

That guy was huge.

He used his bare hands.

You should have seen it!

It was amazing!

- Even old people,

when they have to,

when they need to, they can

turn it on for one last mission.

(Sighing)

I know this is

hard for you.

Your grandfather

loves you very much,

but he can no longer

function by himself,

well, not until we get him

back on his medication.

(Sighing)

- So, what happens to him?

- We're going to move him

to a veterans hospital.

In a few months, you'll

be able to see him again.

We've left word

for your parents.

I'm sure once they get it,

they'll come straight back.

Everything's going to be fine.

- Yeah, sure.

(Sighing)

Take good care of him.

Mr. Bouchard...

- Hey! Hey, you guys, in there!

Hey! Look at me!

Look at me!

I am not moving. OK?

You get Madeleine Harcourt

to come in here.

I am not moving!

Take a look right here.

I'm gonna stand here like

a rock, OK, until I see her.

You got me?

Hey! Maddy.

I, uh...

- What? No salute for

a superior officer?

I'm a commander now.

- Oh! Then, um,

there you go, Commander.

Uh... You always did like

being on top anyway, huh?

- My, oh my!

(Chuckling)

- Where, um...

Where is my grandson?

- We're taking

good care of him.

- Well, I'm sure you are.

And the Angie Wagner situation?

- Uh, yes,

Jake's girlfriend.

We found her car in a garage

where she had it towed.

She's probably having

a great time with her friends.

Sorry she stood up

your grandson.

He looks like

a nice kid.

- He is.

♪ ♪ ♪

(Breathing heavily)

(Grunting)

(Lock clicking)

(Man laughing)

(Breathing heavily)

(Door opening)

(Man talking, indistinct)

(Speaking foreign language)

(Speaking

foreign language)

(Whistling)

(Grunting)

(Breathing heavily)

- (Whispering): Come on!

No, no, no, no!

(Grunting)

(Line ringing)

- 911. What is the nature

of your emergency?

- Hello. My name

is Angie Wagner,

and I've been kidnapped.

Um... My car broke down.

And there was an ambulance

and these SUVs.

And they shot 2 people!

He did! That man from the TV.

- OK, Angie, calm down.

Tell me where you are.

- He--he--he saw me.

And he took me to, um...

I don't know. It's-it's--

it's somewhere by the water.

Look, I got out of the room

they were holding me in

and I got this phone,

but I don't know when

they're gonna be back--

(Speaking

foreign language)

(Shrieking)

- Tell me, Lou,

what were you thinking

blowing your cover like that?

- I wasn't

thinking very much.

- That's the cover story

you chose, Lou.

We were ready to retire you

to a beach somewhere.

- Well, I never really

expected this night to happen.

- Didn't you?

Coming up with that story

about Jake's girlfriend being

mixed up with the Krakhovians...

- That is what where

all the evidence points at.

- And on top of that,

he tells me you divulged

classified information.

And you told him about us.

- I--I told him about,

uh, a double agent.

I didn't use your

name or anything.

But what's the difference?

He's used to his grandpa

telling him these wacky stories.

He never believed

a word of it.

- He thinks you're

the greatest thing

since the personal computer.

- Really, huh?

Hmm...

- Tomorrow, we'll relocate

you to a safe house.

- Um, would it be all right if

I said goodbye to my grandson?

- What for? It'll just make

things harder for everyone.

(Cell chiming)

Excuse me.

Yes?

- Officer, you're

needed in the control room.

I'll be right there.

I've got to go.

- Ah...

- Here. You've

got clearance.

- Oh...

- Get yourself

a cup of coffee,

catch a nap

in the officer's mess.

We'll move you out

in a few hours.

- OK, thanks.

- I'm sorry it has to

be this way, Lou.

- Yeah, well...

OK, sweetie.

Thanks. That Angie Wagner thing,

you're sure about that, huh?

- She's fine! Quit

torturing yourself.

Get some rest.

- I've been doing that

for years, you know.

- Oh, and, Lou...

don't do

anything stupid.

- I'm getting too old

for the game now.

(Grunting)

- Come on, come on, come on.

- Ah!

- Whoa, whoa!

- Yeah! Ah...

(Grunting)

- Oh!

- It's OK.

- Oh, you reek!

- In my country,

we have saying:

"If you hide in vat

of manure for 3 days,

"you don't come out

smelling like the roses."

(Speaking

foreign language)

- OK!

- This does...

This does nothing.

Good night,

budgie rabbit.

- We think it could be

from Komenkho's hideout.

- This just came in

through 911.

- Play it.

- Hello! My name

is Angie Wagner,

and I've been kidnapped.

Um... My car broke down.

And there was an ambulance

and these SUVs.

And they shot 2 people!

He did! That man from the TV.

- OK, Angie, calm down.

Tell me where you are.

- He--he--he saw me.

And he took me to, um...

I don't know. It's--it's--

it's somewhere by the water.

Look, I got out of the room

they were holding me in

and I got this phone,

but I don't know

when they're gonna be back.

(Man speaking foreign language

on recording)

(Angie shrieking

on recording)

- Call 911.

Give them our

clearance information.

Tell them it was

a training call.

- Yes, ma'am.

- Hey.

- Sir?

- I'm here to, um, bring the kid

back to Madeleine Harcourt.

Here you go.

OK, uh,

let's go, Jake.

- What? No.

(Chuckling)

- Excuse me.

Come here, son.

Look, we don't

have any time.

I'll tell you about

everything later, all right?

- I know all

about you.

- Yeah?

- The Section 8 and everything.

- It's not true.

- Madeleine told me.

- Look, quite a few

people in this world

would like to

see my ass dead.

So they built

this cover story.

Come on.

- No, man!

I'm not going

anywhere with you!

Look, I'm tired of everyone

telling me what to do! OK?

- Listen, Angie is

in a lot of trouble.

- No, she's not.

Just because we can't find her

does not mean she is missing.

She must be fine.

- She is not fine.

And if we don't move,

and I'm talking about right now,

she's gonna be a lot

worse than not fine, OK?

Look at me.

I am not crazy.

- How do I know?

- You don't.

You don't. But you do know

that I'm your grandfather.

You know I'm

kind of capable.

Look, as you get older,

you're gonna have a lot

of these moments.

And when they happen,

the best advice I can give you

is you listen to your

heart and your guts,

and you won't go wrong.

So...

(Sighing)

What do you say?

(Sighing)

- OK.

- OK.

- OK.

- Put up the

interrogation room.

Zoom in.

(Sighing)

Dammit, Lou!

Call security

at the entrance.

I'm sure they can

stop Major Crawford.

- Yes, ma'am.

- (Man): Security.

- Aren't they

looking for us?

- They are now.

How you doing?

- One moment, sir.

Are you Major Crawford?

- Uh, yes.

Yes, I am.

Are you, um, shocked

and unconscious?

(Screaming)

That's the trouble

with this generation.

They have no stamina.

- Ma'am...

- Hey, so what are we

supposed to do?

They have

our car keys.

- We don't

need car keys.

I, uh...

I got my, uh...

- Bobby pin?

- No, it's the

original bobby pin.

It's my money clip,

my nose plug,

uh, temporary zipper repair

and my lock pick.

- Oh.

- Come on!

- Grandpa, there's a gate!

- Screw it! Hit it.

- Should we send

men after them?

Ma'am?

- Angie got kidnapped

by Komenkho.

- Komenkho? No.

He's dead, remember?

- Here's what I think happened:

Angie's on the way

to the party.

The car goes on the fritz.

She makes that phone call.

After the phone call, she hears

something from the alley.

She runs out.

She sees this ambulance,

but the patient, he's not dead.

No. He's very much alive.

(Gun firing)

- I see movement!

- This way!

(Man shouting

in foreign language)

(Screaming)

- Run, run, run!

- In the trees!

- (Lou): So, they kidnap Angie

and they get her car towed.

- So, Komenkho faked

his heart attack.

- Well, I mean, he's

indicted on war crimes.

He's got to get out of here.

Angie's his insurance policy.

If we can hack

into the 911 system,

we can get her location.

That's it.

- We have to

talk to Wendell.

- Who?

- Wendell. Trust me,

he's the guy.

(Muffled screaming)

- Hey, stop! Hey, hey!

It's Jake. It's Jake.

Look, we need you to hack

into the 911 phone system.

- Now?

- Yeah.

- It's impossible.

- Not for you.

- It's a government system,

heavily encrypted.

Maybe if I had

my own terminal, I could--

- If we got a government

terminal, would you do it?

Get up!

- Let's go!

- Now?

- Yeah.

- What's going on?

♪ ♪ ♪

- What?

(Chuckling)

Major Lou Crawford,

on my doorstep!

- How you been, Harry?

- You come to finally

pay up on that card game?

- I will. But I need

your help, all right?

- Well, come on in.

- Hi.

- Harry, we brought Wendell here

to hack into the 911 system

because we're tracing

a phone call.

- Meet the last

of the UNIVAC 2000s.

Built it myself, like

everything else in here.

- Jake, the calculator

on my phone

is more sophisticated

than this thing.

- Well, maybe the Japs have

got you fooled into thinking

that phone of yours

is the cat's teats,

but I ain't never met

a communications system

that could keep out

Old Reliable here.

- My phone's

from Korea.

- Koreans make phones?

Well, what's next?

We make pals with the Cubans?

- Actually...

- Listen, if you want

to break into

a government system,

my UNIVAC is the

only game in town.

(Buzzer sounding)

Let me show you

something else here.

Wait till you see this!

(Laughing)

The 7th cup,

all from the same bag.

(Laughing)

- Tea?

- Oh, uh...

- Tea? What about

my 911 call?

- Right, right.

Um... All right, boys.

You, go over there

and wait until I tell you

to throw that switch.

You, sit down here

and wait till I tell you

to push the button.

- OK.

- OK. Get ready.

- This is safe, right?

- Well, we'll

soon find out.

(Laughing)

All right,

flip the switch.

Press the button.

Everybody, cover your eyes!

Yahoo!

Whoo-hoo!

(Laughing)

What's with all

the car alarms?

- Electromagnetic surge!

It's to be expected!

- (Man in distance):

Come on, Harry! Not again!

- I'll hear about

this in the morning.

(Laughing)

- OK. Where's your

Wi-Fi code?

- Wi-what?

- Never mind.

I'll just improvise.

- Hey, Harry,

what's that?

- Batteries.

Elon Musk's

team design.

It can feed this entire

building for a month.

- If I can link your

computer to mine,

I should be able to establish a

connection to the 911 database.

(Beeping)

I'm in!

OK, locating our time frame...

Let's see what we have.

- (Woman): My cat's stuck up

the tree! Now it's down again!

- My name is

Angie Wagner and...

- Stop! That's it!

- Um... My car broke down.

And there was an ambulance

and these SUVs.

And they shot 2 people!

He did! That man from the TV.

- Komenkho?

- He saw me.

And he took me to, um...

I don't know. It's--it's

somewhere by the water.

I got out of the room

they were holding me in

and I got this phone,

but I don't know

when they're gonna be back.

(Man speaking foreign language

on recording)

- No! Come on, you

got to find them, buddy.

Come on, please.

- I've retraced where

the signal came from.

- What do we do now, Grandpa?

- Let's get the rest

of the Scum.

- Boys, I want you to meet our

paratrooper and climbing fool.

This is Mother.

- Is he dead?

(Gasping, coughing)

Ah!

- Is that you, Major?

Harry!

- Just please

let me go, Mr. Mother.

- Give us a little

love, brother.

- Help me up!

(Doorbell buzzing)

- What does it take--

- Hey, Wolf!

- Lou!

Harry!

- Wolf!

- Hey!

- Mother, you, uh...

(Chuckling)

This a surprise!

I mean...

- Oh, hey, boys,

this is, uh, Wolf.

He's our

explosives expert.

- Hi!

- A man of the cloth...

Some things do change.

- Honey! Don't leave me hanging.

I've got a spec...

- Some things don't!

- (Whispering):

I'm sorry.

- Shhh, shhh! Shhh!

- Grandpa, are you sure

we're supposed to--

- Shhh, shhh, shhh!

- So, you've come to play games

with ol' Giovanni, huh?

I gotta tell you:

I play to win.

- Good evening, Giovanni.

- Major?

(Chuckling)

- I thought

you were dead!

I don't think so, no.

No, but I'm a little older.

But, look, maybe you

can help me.

I'm looking for some

gun-crazed weapons engineer

and a--and a camo expert.

- Let me thing about it

for about a week.

- Do that.

- I'll get back to you.

- Uh-huh.

- Louis! Louis! Louis!

(All laughing)

- I thought you were dead.

- No, no.

- Scum! It's the Scum!

You're all a bunch of scum!

That's what you are!

(All laughing)

- Oh, man!

- And you're still alive!

And you're

still alive!

- Yeah!

- You're all old people!

What did you do,

empty out the rest home?

- You got anything

you want to confess?

- You can stick that

where the sun don't shine.

Who are the kids?

Gentlemen! Behold!

A veritable Geppetto's workhouse

of military wonders,

where the warrior in you

can find everything he needs

to achieve his

greatest dreams.

- Hmm!

- Oh yeah!

- Oh!

- Hey! Get away from that gun!

- I'm sorry!

- You ruined my coffee pot!

- I said I was sorry, OK?

It just looked cool.

- You ruined

my coffee pot.

- That's too bad.

That was really good coffee.

- OK!

At 7:45 this afternoon,

my grandson's girlfriend

was kidnapped by Krakhovians.

- Krakhovians?

- Komenkho.

- Oh boy!

- All right, so,

this is the warehouse

where they're holding her.

We got 4 entrances here.

What we have to do

is coordinate a strike

at each one of those entrances.

What we need to do first

is get 2 cameras

from these opposite corners here

to cover the whole place.

Now, along this west wall here,

there's a bunch

of these transformers.

And we'll need you

to, uh, sneak in there

and throw that switch off

for a diversion.

Pop it off.

- OK?

- Just pop it off?

- Yeah, pop it off.

This...

- Mm-hmm?

- ...is you.

You will zip line

from the tower to the roof,

and then rappel down

onto the south entrance.

- I'm not going up there!

- You were the best

wire man we had.

Please go there, alright?

Harry...

- Hmm?

(Inhaling deeply)

- The north,

which is the channel

you'll be coming through,

the north,

that's water

- In the water?

- That reminds me. I saw

one of them deep-diving suits.

- Yeah, I have that.

That's vintage, 1944.

- Nice!

- Uh, still works, I think.

- You think? What do

you mean, you think?

- Ah, 50-50.

I'm kidding you!

- Oh, OK.

- All right, Wolf,

right outside the east side,

about 100, 200 yards

down the road,

there's this trolley.

I want you to load it up

with explosives

and run it into that door,

splintering it

to smithereens, OK,

just like we did

in Saigon in '71.

-Oh. Whoa, whoa!

You're kidding, right?

- Do I look

like I'm kidding?

- Yeah.

(Laughing)

- Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa!

- Take it easy, guys.

(Chuckling)

- I want to talk to you about,

um, our assault vehicle.

What happened

to the Scummobile?

(Chuckles)

- I sold it.

- Seriously?

- I'm sorry.

I needed the money.

- It's not your fault, OK?

Now, is there any chance

that maybe you got,

uh, something else?

You got another

kind of vehicle or...

That means yes,

when you're smiling.

- Yes!

- Good.

I made it myself. Come here!

- Come on, boys! Let's go.

♪ ♪ ♪

- Gentlemen!

- Wow!

An original 1979

Volkswagen Transporter 2.

This is awesome!

- Lou, what in Heaven's name are

we supposed to do with that?

- It could make

a great base camp.

- Are you serious?

- I kind of like it.

It looks pretty cool.

- But we gonna die!

- Are we out of our

fricking minds here?

- Hey, Wolf...

- Wolf, nothing!

In case you haven't

noticed, Major,

we're no youngsters anymore.

And I got myself a woman.

And I'm a priest,

and a damned good one!

- Maybe we want to think

this thing through.

Let's sleep

on it, all right?

- I don't sleep good anymore.

I pee 8 times a night.

Six in the toilet.

- I--I don't think this

is a good time for this.

- Enough of that! OK?

Forget this crazy talk!

We should all go home.

Forget this night ever happened.

Look, I love you guys.

You're gonna do

what you're gonna do.

May God go with you.

I'm out of here.

- I think Wolf

has a point, Lou.

- It's... I...

I... Uh...

(Sighing)

- No.

- Another time,

another place, fellas.

Drop in to my church.

It might do you some good.

- Bye.

- What, that's it?

This is the Devil's Scum

I've heard so much about?

The men who assassinated Hitler,

who fronted the Tet Offensive?

That's it?

You know what? Just go.

Leave. But I will never

forget this night.

You want to know why?

'Cause this is the night

that I learned about bravery.

And I learned it from

hearing stories about you men,

the Devil's Scum!

Look, my generation,

we have no idea

how good we have it.

OK, we--we--we text

on our smartphones,

we update our statuses

on Facebook,

we--we listen to our music

in the Cloud,

all without realizing

that this world is a safer place

because of men like you,

men who fought so that kids

like me could be free

to--to text and tweet

and "like" and "poke."

OK, you know

what I said today?

I said that old people

should be seen and not heard.

- It's true. I heard it.

I thought it was

very disrespectful.

- Well, I was wrong.

Old people have a lot

to teach my generation.

One thing they don't have to

teach us is how to quit.

'Cause we already

know how to do that.

You know, the

Devil's Scum,

you guys took on the world when

the world was a dangerous place.

Well, you know what? The world

is still a dangerous place.

And now more than ever,

we need heroes.

There's a girl

in trouble tonight...

big trouble.

And she needs you.

She needs

the Devil's Scum.

So go on.

Leave. Quit.

Do what you

want to do.

But I know 2 people

who aren't gonna quit.

Right, Grandpa?

- That's right, son.

- Wrong.

There's 3 of us.

- What do you say, boys?

A chance to go out

on our shields.

- (Whispering):

Come on.

Wendell?

- As long as I'm home

before breakfast.

Mom's making

chocolate-chip pancakes.

(Chuckling)

- Nobody pulls us apart.

- (Devil's Scum):

Not before we break them apart!

- All right,

the sun's coming up.

- Mm-hmm.

- Up jump the Devil, boys.

- Thank you, sir.

(Insects chirring)

- (Lou): You sure you boys

want to be here?

- Well, I'm so scared,

I might pee in my pants.

- Yeah, I'm all in.

(Groaning)

I'm too old for this.

(Laughing)

- Mother, you all

clear up there?

- Eagle eye. Two birds

on the roof.

- Cage them all.

All of them.

- Copy that.

Sleep well, soldiers!

(Men grunting)

- (Lou): Harry,

there's 2 coming towards you.

Don't blow any bubbles, OK?

- Roger that!

Where am I going again?

- The eyes are on.

(Beeping)

- Roger.

- It's exposed here.

Watch for me.

- East/south eyes...

are hot.

- Copy that.

Gio. Don't move!

You got a guy coming.

- Hey, zoom out.

(Exhaling)

- Am I clear?

- Yeah, you're all clear.

Now turn off that switch.

- All right. Here I go.

- Eagle Eye! You

ready to fly, brother?

- Oh yeah!

- Hey, it's working.

(Exhaling sharply)

- It's time...

- Yeah? OK.

What do I do if you need help?

- Um, it'll come to you.

- Hey, Grandpa...

- Yeah?

- Be careful.

- Thanks.

- Whoa! No.

Oh, please!

Don't look down!

Don't look down.

Oh, I looked down.

(Screaming)

No! Ah! Oh!

There goes my last kidney.

(Grunting)

All right. Got you!

Oh, I gotta get up!

Oh my goodness.

Ah!

(Talking indistinctly)

(Grunting)

- Ah!

(Grunting)

It's easier with cartilage.

- OK! Here we go.

Real simple...

(Bones cracking)

Oh, my back!

- Why isn't he

flicking the switch?

- Lord, please protect Lou

so I can kill him myself!

(Grunting)

♪ ♪ ♪

- Gio! Come on,

what the heck's going on?

- Lou, hold on a minute.

A slipped disc.

Ah, two inches.

(Harry laughing

on CB radio)

- Harry?

- Oh!

- Which one of those

tanks did you take?

- The one with the...

The one with the smiley face!

(Laughing)

- That's happy gas, you idiot!

- I want you out

of the water right now!

- Come on, come on!

General, there is

some activity in the water.

Something going on down there.

(Speaking

foreign language)

(Komenkho continues

talking on CB)

- We might got some troubles.

- Troubles?

- Troubles!

(Speaking

foreign language)

You don't know

that word, "troubles"?

Idiot! You know

that word?

- Idiot. Copy.

- You know that word?

(Speaking

foreign language)

Yeah...

- Hey, hey!

S-s-something's going on.

Looks like the--

the guards have been alerted.

- All right. We'll use that

as a distraction.

Now go!

- Roger that.

OK, they're gone! Ah!

(Laughing)

- You! Hands up!

- Hmm?

- Turn around!

- Ah!

- Whoo!

(Grunting)

- Hmm... Uh...

- How you doing?

(Grunting)

(Speaking

foreign language)

- Can one of you guys

help me out of this thing?

Gio! How are you?

- Not so good. You?

(Laughing)

- Oh, pretty good.

Not bad.

(Komenkho speaking

foreign language on CB)

- Grandpa, they're all busted.

- Are you sure?

- Yeah. Well, I'm not sure about

Mother, but the others are.

What do we do?

- Just stay in that truck, OK?

I want you to stay

in that truck.

Do that for me please, OK?

I'll take care of it.

Grandpa? Grandpa?

We gotta

do something.

- We can't fight

the Krakhovians.

We got midterms next week.

What are you doing?

- What does it

look like I'm doing?

Come on...

- No, I...

- Hey, no!

I'm staying,

you're staying.

(Guards talking, indistinct)

(Grunting)

(Guards speaking

foreign language)

(Grunting)

- Oh!

Hey, you don't even

know my name, man.

- This?

- Batteries for

my pacemaker.

- "Pissmaker"?

- "Pacemaker".

(Chuckling)

- Pissmaker!

(Guards laughing)

Pissmaker!

I didn't know.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever,

you Krakhovian cabbage.

- Shut!

- You shut!

- You shut!

- Shut you!

- Leave him alone!

(Grunting)

- Welcome!

Welcome.

Welcome.

Who are you

old men?

- Nobody you'd

care to know.

- Nobody! Oh!

"Nobody," says the man

in the green bush.

Hello!

Hey!

And you are here

to do what, huh?

Arrest me? Oh!

What are you

old fools thinking, huh?

Come on, guys,

is this a joke? Huh?

Is this a joke?

I love jokes. What?

This is

a joke. Come on!

- We're soldiers.

- Oh, oh!

Is that so? Hmm.

And from what century?

(Laughing)

(All laughing)

(Speaking foreign language)

(Inhaling deeply)

And your commander?

Oh! OK, I see.

All for one and one

for all the old farts, huh?

(Grunting)

Oh come on, bunny rabbit!

You don't like that? Ah!

(Speaking

foreign language)

I really hope you guys

wear your old-man diapers.

(Clanging sound)

- (Lou): Hold your fire!

Hold on! Take it easy.

Easy, big guy.

(Grunting,

bones cracking)

- Ah, thanks, Lou!

Ah!

- Angie, are you

all right?

- Who are you?

- Uh, Lou Crawford.

- Wait. What, what,

what, what, what?

What, what, what?

Major Lou Crawford?

The Major Lou Crawford?

- The... Will you stop that?

I'm trying to have

a conversation here.

- Oh. Sorry, Lou.

- Come on!

- Sorry.

- Yeah.

The Major Lou Crawford?

The same Major Lou Crawford

the KGB called...

(Speaking foreign language)

...Canuckian?

- Crazy Canuck. Yeah!

So you know

about me, huh?

- I received my military

education in Stalingrad.

Your exploits were

required reading.

- I'm honoured.

- Don't be.

I was sent

to Stalingrad to study

after my father was

killed in action,

by you.

- It's official. We're hosed.

- You probably don't even

know who my father was.

- I pretty much remember

almost everybody I killed.

He wasn't a

very nice guy.

- He had a family!

- He had a brother? Sister?

- Younger sister! She teaches,

uh, children how to swim.

- Mother?

- Of course!

- Well, your father,

he should have thought

of you poor people

before he tried to buy

that enriched uranium

from one of my spies.

- Mmm... I killed

that spy a few years ago.

- (Mother):

E-e-excuse me!

You mind if we

go and sit down

while you have

your pissing contest?

- Yeah, no,

that's all right.

Yeah, it's OK. Yeah.

- Thank you.

- Yeah, I'm good

with that. You?

- Yeah, yes.

- OK. Sure.

- Look, we all know

that you faked your death

and that you're trying to

get out of the country.

So, in the nicest way,

I'm asking you:

Why don't you let

this poor girl go?

- I would hope that

your superiors know.

They helped me

plan my escape.

- Maddy...

- Maddy! Maddy...

Yeah, call it

a little payback

for all the help I gave ASPIC

in the early '90s.

I helped you take down

the Berlin Wall,

now you help me

get away

from all those, um,

unpleasant war-crimes trials.

I don't like them!

I don't like those,

you know? You know?

But they just don't know that

I'm going to kill all their men

and leave the country on my own.

But I'm crazy like that!

♪ Crazy like that

Crazy like that ♪

(Guard speaking

foreign language)

Uh-huh!

Our ride is here.

- (Harry): What does

he mean, "our ride"?

- Don't worry.

They can't shoot us here.

It'd leave

too much evidence.

They'll get caught

before they leave.

- Very good, Major.

Man, you still got it.

Or I just shoot you now

and take my chances with ASPIC.

- Oh, aisle seat, please.

- Don't you have

a backup plan?

- I--I--I think so, yeah.

(Shouting in foreign language)

- It's the lighter!

- Angie!

- Jake? Jake!

- Ah!

- Take cover!

(Breathing heavily)

(Both grunting)

(Laughing)

- Mother!

- (in foreign language)

IT'S A DUD!! IT'S A BLUFF!!

(All screaming)

- Cheap commie crap!

Whose side are You on?

- Hey! Hey!

- I'm sorry, Lou!

- Kill them.

(Speaking foreign language)

- Angie!

- Jake!

(Guards shouting, indistinct)

(Angie): Jake!

- Hold on! I'm coming!

- Let me go!

Jake!

- (Komenkho):

We'll be back!

- Wish me luck.

- Huh?

(Screaming)

- Mr. Wolf!

- How about me?

- Giovanni!

- Meet your maker!

- Jake!

(Speaking foreign language)

(Laughing)

- No, no, no!

Ah! Ah!

(Speaking

foreign language)

(Screaming)

(Laughing)

♪ Crazy

like that ♪

(Speaking foreign language)

(Screaming)

Uh...

(Speaking foreign language)

...Canuckian.

I'll take you upstairs

for insurance. Yeah.

Come on,

bunny rabbit.

Up! Up!

Move.

What are you waiting for?

Go get him!

- (Angie): Let me go!

Come on! Let's get

some carrots.

- Stay here!

- Yeah, I can do that!

(Guard shouting, indistinct)

- Where is

the old man?

(Sniffling)

- How you doing, Harry?

- They're gonna get

a big charge out of this.

- Well, hurry up!

- Whoa, that was close!

(Breathing heavily)

- Grandpa?

(Both talking, indistinct)

(Komenkho and Angie

talking in distance)

- That's right.

That's right.

- Let me go!

- Oh!

- Let me go,

you stinking pig!

- You little witch!

If you cannot break the spirit,

break the body. Come on!

(Komenkho talking

in distance, indistinct)

(Komenkho): Come on!

Come on! Don't be scared.

It's OK. Come on!

- Komenkho!

(Speaking

foreign language)

(Screaming)

Hey, you OK?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

(Lou and Angie

talking, indistinct)

(Talking indistinctly)

(Breathing heavily)

- Angie? Angie!

- Jake? Jake!

What are you doing here?

- I came with my

grandpa to get you.

- That old man

is your grandpa?

- Isn't he awesome?

- We have to go!

He's on the 2nd floor.

- Do you know where?

- Yes!

(Both grunting)

- Hello, kittens!

- Back, back, back!

- Hello, kittens!

(Meowing)

(Laughing)

- Angie?

- Yeah?

- Batter up.

- Yeah.

- I know what you're

thinking right now.

You're thinking to yourself:

"Why isn't this kid

scared of me?"

Am I right?

Of course I'm right.

You're thinking: "What does

this kid know that I don't know

"that's making him

so fearless?

"Maybe he's insane.

"But maybe, just maybe, this kid

can take care of himself."

(Speaking foreign language)

(Laughing)

(Laughing mockingly)

- Oh!

(Grunting)

(Groaning)

- Hey! Are you OK?

- Are you OK?

- I'm fine.

- How--how did you find me?

- Grandpa.

- What--what about your grandpa?

- I'll tell you

about it later.

- Oh!

How's that

for confidence?

- That was good.

- Not bad, huh?

- I liked it.

That was good.

- Grandpa?

- Let's go.

- Ah!

- I'm empty!

- Don't ask me. I'm out!

- Time to put her on!

Ah! Switches...

Ah! I think I'm ready.

(Speaking

foreign language)

It's getting hot!

- Harry, do your magic!

- Wait! What?

(Talking indistinctly)

(Laughing)

(Screaming)

(Laughing)

(Screaming)

(Screaming)

(Screaming)

(Guard): Pissmaker...

- Harry! I love you, Harry!

- God works in

wondrous ways

with a little help

from you, Harry!

- I knew you

could do it!

(Both grunting)

- This way!

This way!

- No, no, no!

Wait, wait, wait!

- What?

(Grunting)

- Follow me. Come on.

- Oh!

(Grunting)

Ah!

(Komenkho groaning)

- Hey! Grandpa, you OK?

- I think so.

- Watch out!

- I kill you all.

(Speaking foreign language)

(Beeping)

Bluff!

- A backup plan.

They're 2 MID 69

super-EX mines,

and they'll barbecue

your ass to a crisp.

- What are you? Some kind of

big soldier now, huh?

- Nope.

- Huh?

- Major Lou Crawford's grandson.

(Screaming)

- They're only smoke bombs?

- Yeah. I lied!

- That's my boy!

(Coughing)

You guys stay there.

Do not move.

- (Both): OK.

(Moaning)

- Excuse me.

- Ah!

Ah!

(Screaming)

(Screaming)

(Komenkho thudding)

- Come on.

Hey! You OK?

- Oh!

- Oof!

- Yeah.

- Well, that

probably hurt.

- Ah! Good job, son.

I'm proud of you.

- Well, I've learned

from the best.

- What did you say to me?

No, I got it.

I got it.

No, I'm not that old.

I get it. OK.

- Who was

that, Lou?

- Uh, Harcourt. She's, uh,

right outside here somewhere.

So, uh, again,

boys, good job.

- Ah! It was fun, Lou!

A walk in the park.

- Only next time, Lou, make the

mission a little bit difficult.

(All laughing)

- That was awesome!

Hey, do I get

a cigar too?

- When you start

shaving, Einstein.

(Siren wailing)

(Men and women

chatting, indistinct)

- (Woman on CB):

The scene is secure.

- Copy that.

- Hey, Jakey! Introduce us

to your girlfriend.

(Laughing)

Uh, yeah. Angie,

this is Scum.

Scum, this is Angie.

And she is not my girlfriend.

- Like hell I'm not!

(Scoffing)

Come here.

- Whoo!

- Whoo!

- Nice!

- Little boy's growing up!

- Nice!

- Angie, if I were

60 years younger...

- Hey!

- Is that Madeleine Harcourt?

- No fatalities.

- My, she's a hot one!

- I wish I was 70 again.

- Yeah!

(Chuckling)

(Siren wailing in distance)

- My, oh my, Lou!

What have you done?

- Exactly what you

wanted me to do, dear.

- Figured it out, did you?

- Yeah, I was a little,

uh, little late on that,

but I started thinking

and I was wondering,

and then it came to me.

How the heck did I get

out of that agency

with the kid,

so fast, so easy?

How did that happen?

- Just because some

politician tells me

I have to help the bastard

get out of the country,

it doesn't mean I

have to get in the way

of someone trying

to stop him.

- Yeah, well, you could

have got us all killed.

- It was a risk I was

willing to take.

He had the girl, and there was

nothing I could do to help her.

- You almost got

my grandson killed!

- Who told you

to bring him along?

Lou, darling,

we've seen so much

action together.

Let's put this behind us.

Everyone's fine:

your grandson, your men...

It's been a good mission.

Just like the old days.

- Like the

old days. Exactly!

(Grunting)

- Medic!

- What's going on over there?

- What the heck?

- Grandpa!

- Are you OK, sir?

- What's wrong with him?

He's going into cardiac arrest.

Bring a stretcher!

- Get him to an

ambulance now!

(Chatter on CB radio,

indistinct)

- Grandpa, you're

gonna be OK.

- You got him?

- Wait, wait, wait!

- Don't be scared, son.

- I'm sorry. We have to go.

- Move! Move!

- Dock him in.

Go straight in.

- No, no, no.

Jake, you stay here.

It's better. Better.

- Go, ma'am.

All clear.

Close them up.

(Sirens wailing)

(Sighing)

- We'll see you back

at the house, OK, Jake?

- Take your time.

- (Woman):

Such a great guy.

- How are you doing?

- I'm fine.

- Really?

(Sniffling)

- No.

- Jakey, you got

a moment?

- I'll see you back

at the house, OK?

- Yeah.

(Sniffling)

- She's a great

gal, Jakey.

- Only one at school

worth fighting for.

- Yeah, me and the boys,

uh, we were talking.

There's something

about your grandfather

we think you

should know.

- You see...

When your grandpa was

released from active duty...

they wanted

to relocate him

to a place like

the Bahamas or Switzerland

so he'd be safe.

You know, all those villains

were after him, like Komenkho.

But he wouldn't go.

(Exhales sharply)

- Grandpa never could

run from a fight.

(Chuckling)

- We--we ran from

lots of fights, him and us.

That's why we all

made it as long as we did.

- Your grandfather wouldn't

leave because of you.

- (Sobbing): Me?

- He wanted to be

close to you.

- It was his idea to...

(Laughing)

...to fake being senile,

end up in a nursing home.

Perfect cover!

So the bad boys

would feel sorry for him

and, uh, leave him alone.

And it...

Hell, it worked.

(Laughing)

- He kept up the act...

all those years,

just to see you grow up.

(Sobbing)

- We only took him out of

that home twice a month.

- Yeah, well, that was

good enough for him.

He, uh, wanted you

to have these.

(Sobbing)

- And these...

You're family now, kiddo.

Nothing pulls us apart.

- We thought

you should know.

- Thank you.

(Sniffling)

Up jumps the Devil.

- Yeah!

- Yeah.

(Sobbing)

(Sniffling)

- So, what's the

plan tonight, Picasso?

- Oh, let's see...

- Mm-hmm.

- I come to your game...

- OK.

- ...watch you beat the snot

out of Westmore Academy,

and then take you

out to celebrate?

- Done!

- And my parents

aren't home.

- Oh, well, maybe

we could, um...

- Hey! What an

adorable couple!

- Grandpa?

(Scoffing)

- Nice!

(Chuckling)

- Grandpa!

(Both laughing)

- Hey, kid!

- Hey!

- Hi, Angie!

- What is this? I mean,

you're supposed to be...

- Dead!

- Yeah!

- Yeah, officially, I am,

but I got to tell you,

it's very liberating.

- I--I don't understand.

Uh, how?

- Well, uh, the lunatic asylum

I was in over there...

I hated it at

the nursing home,

so Maddy was gracious

enough to get me out.

So, "dead," now,

is my, uh, cover.

- You pulled a Komenkho

and faked your own death?

- Yeah, but see,

that guy,

he got a beautiful nice

funeral out of it.

You know what I mean?

(Laughing)

- I, uh... Mom!

Grandpa, we gotta tell Mom!

- Oh, no,

no, no. No.

Uh, let me get settled

for a little while,

and we'll bring

her up to speed,

you know, once

I get settled, OK?

- Well, where

are you going?

- Well, I'm, uh...

- Coming, darling?

Hi, Mr. Bouchard!

- Hi, Ms. Harcourt!

- Yeah, she's, uh, she's got

a little farm down in Mexico.

No televisions,

no TVs, no minivans.

Pigs, ducks, you know, sun,

a few of the blue pills...

(All laughing)

Perfect, right?

- You are something else.

You know that?

- Yeah, man!

(♪ Dream by

Christian Marc Gendron ♪)

- Oh, by the way...

- No, no, no!

Keep those, you know,

in case I feel, like, bored,

and I want to come

out of retirement.

- OK.

- I gotta go, you guys.

- OK, yeah.

- Bye, gorgeous!

- Bye!

- And, um, I will, uh, text

you guys in a little while.

- Oh! Hey, Grandpa,

by the way...

What are you gonna

do on a farm?

What do you know about

chickens, pigs or goats?

- Let me tell

you something.

If I can destroy Death Star

and save the galaxy...

- Star Wars? Really?

- Yeah.

- Yeah?

- Lucas, that bum, he took

2 planets, changed the names...

- So, legally, it became

a different story.

- Exactly. That's why I

don't get one cent of royalties.

- That guy...

- That guy!

I got to feed

some of the...

(Oinking)

♪♪ When life is about to give

you what you want ♪

♪ You really need to

give it all you have ♪

♪ You know you got to try

Believe in you and I ♪

♪ Just take that chance

and we'll reach the sky ♪

♪ I think of you

every second of the day ♪

♪ I want to give you my hand ♪

♪ You know you got to try

Believe in you and I ♪

♪ Just take that chance

and we'll reach the sky ♪

♪ We're meant to be together ♪

♪ We're meant to be together ♪

♪ We're meant to be together ♪

♪ We're meant to be together ♪

♪ You're my dream ♪

♪ I was waiting for you

for all this time ♪

♪ I dream that we can

make it through time ♪

♪ And make each other dream ♪

♪ Of a better life ♪

♪ And be a part

of each other's life ♪

♪ Of each other's life ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪

♪ You rock the world ♪

♪ Yeah, you rock

the world, girl ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪

♪ Let's do it together ♪♪