All language subtitles for The.West.Wing.S04E20.WEBRip.x264-FGT

Previously, on The West Wing...
PRESIDENT:
Zoey is here.

She's starting
Georgetown in
the spring.

( cheering )

I was wondering
how you would feel

about my going out
on a date with Zoey.

I'm sorry?

Stop pursuing me.

Respectfully... no.

She likes having
her picture taken.

She doesn't like having
her picture taken.

She doesn't mind
having it taken with me.

He may be good-looking and rich

and well schooled
and French royalty,

you know, and live basically
in a castle, but...

Oh, God.

C.J.:
At the exact moment
of the equinox.

At the exact moment
of the equinox.

Doesn't work.
It does work.

It has to be the exact
moment of the equinox.

Doesn't work.
I've seen it.

I tried it.
And?

Doesn't work.
I don't think you did
it at the exact moment.

I did.

When?
Last September.

That was
the Autumnal Equinox.

It only works
for the Vernal Equinox?

Yeah.
You know what's
more likely?

That it doesn't work at all?

That's right.
It does--
I've seen it.

We've got pastrami
from Krupin's.

It's tissue paper thin.

Roast beef, corned beef,
turkey, Russian dressing,

coleslaw and seedless rye,

and winning the hard-earned
money of your coworkers.

This is what I call a night off.

Squeeze this piece of rye bread.

Now what do I do?

Excuse me, Leo?

Yeah?

JOSH:
Something's that true
at the Vernal Equinox

would have to also be true
at the Autumnal Equinox.
Why?

"Equinox" means
"equal night."

Night and day are both
12 hours long.

What does that have
to do with it?

It doesn't work-- I tried it.

TOBY:
Listen, there's...
Hang on.

C.J. believes that at the exact
moment of the Vernal Equinox...

And only at that moment.
You can stand an egg vertically.

Huh?
At the equinox,

you can stand an egg on its end.

TOBY:
Yeah, that doesn't work.
You tried it?

I don't have to try it;
you can't stand an egg

on its end--
the elements involved

with creating an equinox have...

have no connection to the center
of gravity of an egg.

I've seen it.

I've seen guys make
the ace of spades

jump out of their shoes.

I don't think it
was the equinox.

Josh?
Yeah?

Counsel's office wants to know
if you can meet with a candidate

for the associate's
position tonight.

Tonight?
I explained it was
your night off,

but they said he's in town
just the one night, and...

Yeah.

So can I take your seat
when you're not playing?

I miss Ainsley.

That's who the Counsel's
office should get

to fill that position--
another Ainsley.

A sexy conservative
with first-rate law credentials

and a strange name.

So can I take your seat?

Who else is playing
in this game?

Anyone with currency.

Let me in the game, sir,
I beg of you.

Why are you so eager
to get in this game?

I enjoy poker, Mr. President,

and your card skills are
well known around the building,

and... frankly,
I wanted to learn.

Seriously.

I enjoy poker.

This is a cash game, Debbie.

These are hardworking people
blowing off some steam

and taking each other
off their coin.

We don't play
for matchsticks,
and we don't play...

Okay, can I ask
you something?

I forgot to have Charlie
draw cash for me.

Could you float me...

( knocking on door )
I can play?

Sir.
Leo, C.J. swears

that on the equinox,
which is today,

you can stand an egg on end.

Debbie?

Thank you, Mr. President.

Yeah, you can play.

Thank you, sir.

( door closes )

We just lost an
unmanned spy plane.

Where?
It was a Predator B-UAV

12 miles off Kaliningrad.

It's controlled
by satellite,

which can't always adjust
to sudden weather changes,

and this one veered off
course and crashed inland.

Well, that's why these
are unmanned, right?

All we lost was money?

Aren't they saying
detonate the plane?

The plane was
taking pictures

of illegal nuclear
transfers in the region,

call Chigorin
and ask if we can go in

and get our spy plane back?

Yes, sir. Except you
can't say spy plane.

Wait, you're serious.
They want me to call Chigorin?

Yes.
And ask him for the plane back

without telling him
we were spying?

State and the Pentagon
have some ideas on how
you might try that.

Do they?

In the meantime, sir,

do you want to
play some cards?

Hang on.

Yeah, this isn't going
to work.

Three.

I'm fine.

You're fine?

I am.

Check.
Check.

Check.
Check.

Check.

Fifty dollars.

PRESIDENT:
Fold.
Fold.

I'm out.
Out.

Take it.

Nothing like
the mounting tension

of a well-contested hand.

You were full of crap.

You had jack-high or something?

I'll tell you, but it's going
to cost you 50 bucks.

WILL:
Hi.

Good evening, Mr. President.

Did you get the eggs?

Yeah.

Hang on.

Will, why are
you dressed

like an officer
in the Air Force?

I'm an officer
in the Air Force.

You're a reservist?
Yes, sir.

I didn't know that.
Did you know that?

He's First Lieutenant Will.

I had no idea. What do you do?

I work with the JAG Corps.

And this is your weekend up?

Yes, sir.
Well, good for you.

Where are you stationed?
Since I moved here,

I'm stationed at the Air Force

Legal Services Agency
at Bolling Air Force Base,

but tonight
I'm going to Cheyenne.
Mr. President?

They ready?
No, sir.

Leo wanted you a moment.

Play my seat.

Are we getting somewhere?

Oh, yeah.

You know, there was a thought
that since Kaliningrad's

the only noncontiguous
Russian state,

you could make like you were
just informing Chigorin

of a rescue mission
that barely concerned him.

And what do I do
when Chigorin tells me

that Hawaii's not really
a part of America,

and he wants to change
the alphabet to Cyrillic?

Seymour! What does he do?

What the hell.

Would you, please?

I'm not going to have you
tell Chigorin

that Kaliningrad's
not part of Russia.

What area are we trolling in?

What area?
Yes.

We weren't spying on Russia.

We were spying for Russia.

We were spying for him?
Yes, sir.

Okay. This phone call
that you're going to
set up with Chigorin--

it's, like, for a
White House bloopers
reel or something?

Just give us
a couple of minutes.

All right.

Two things I want
to put on your radar.
Yeah.

There was a bombing at
a nightclub in Kuala Lumpur,

and they've got
a suspect in Berlin

who was trying
to explode a device
at the Brandenburg gate.

Are the two related?

I don't know,
but there were two,

so I wanted
to tell you about it.

All right.

Check.
Check.
Check.

Fifty dollars.

I fold.

Out.
Fold.
I'm out.

Make her prove it, Toby.

Show her there are
no free lunches in
a Friday night game.

Call.

Straight to the king.

( others chuckling )

All right,
sorry about that.

I'll get her for you.

Here's an extra card.

That's the joker.

ALL:
Oh!
Oh, my God, did you see that?

Did you guys see that?

OTHERS:
Oh!

We're not going to need
that three of clubs?

Standing at the podium
in the press room,

I could hit a seat
in the fifth row.

No, I don't believe that's true.

Really?
I believe it's a myth.

Well, there are 52 cards
in this deck...

51. The three of clubs...

Dollar a card?
Yes.

Sit down and play poker.
I'm dealing.

DONNA:
Excuse me, Josh?

Yeah.
The guy's in the Roosevelt Room.

Which guy is this?

For the Associate Counsel job.

( sighs )

Deal me out
for three hands.

Can I say something?
Yeah.

This guy...
Yeah?

There are some who'd
consider him handsome.

I don't personally,
'cause you're the only one

I think is handsome.
Uh-huh.

But for the sake
of appearances,

here around the office

so that people
wouldn't suspect,

I'd pretend I thought
this guy was handsome
if you hired him.

Of course, all along,
it'd be a lie

'cause of how
handsome you are...
and powerful.

Your sense of humor is a bit
of a high-wire act, isn't it?

You're really trying
to thread the needle.

And half of it,
you don't even get.

Give me that.

Hector?

Excuse me?

Are you Hector?

No, I'm Joe Quincy.

Hang on.

( quietly ):
Sorry.

Can I just ask?
Yeah.

Are you saying it's Hector
who's good-looking or...?

This guy, this guy.
Okay.

But not really,
'cause it's only
you that I...
Yeah, yeah.

Excuse me. Joseph.

Yes. Joseph Quincy.
Josh Lyman.

Joe?
Yes.

No, I was asking, do you
like to be called Joe?

Yes.

Were you saying yes
to that the first time?

Yes, Joe is fine.
It's what people call me.

It's funny, it's what I was just
saying-- the person who created

the job opening, her name was
Ainsley Hayes, and she was,

uh, she was a very
attractive woman

and I was saying that

we needed to find
another attractive woman

with an unusual name,
and here you're a man,

and your name is Joe.

Got to be asking yourself
why I told you that story.

Uh, you have a joint JD-MBA?

Yeah.
What does
a staff attorney do

at the New York City Department
of Transportation?

Defend the City against people
with civil claims.

Slipping in the subway?
Slipping in the subway.

Banging your head
on a turnstile.
Yes.

After a JD-MBA from Cal?

I wanted to get trial experience
right away, so...

Then Associate Counsel
at Treasury,

then the Solicitor General's
Office.

Why did you leave
the Solicitor General's Office?

You appointed
a new Solicitor General.

You weren't
a political appointee?

No. I just answered a call
from a headhunter.

I'm surprised we haven't met.

( knock at door )

Excuse me.

I'll be back in a second.

You forgot to sign the bottom
of the questionnaire, the SF-86.

You got to sign your name.

If the President says yes,

we're going to set up the call
in about ten minutes.

PRESIDENT:
What do we have?

LEO:
All right,
best-case scenario is that

he lets our guys go in

and get it untouched
by Russian hands.

But President Bartlet,

we have a terrific
search-and-recovery team.

We'll just go get that plane
for you.

and only our folks know
how to make it de-operational.

"Our folks"?
You really think

I'd use those words
with the Russian President?

You say, "Sir, this UAV has
proprietary American technology

"on it made by one of our
leading aerospace companies,

and we have to protect that."

Much as I have to protect
Kaliningrad, sir,

which brings us to the question

of what the hell were you doing
flying over it?!

It had
a multiple mission.
Did it?

Exactly for this purpose.

What was the other mission?

Taking satellite pictures

of coastal erosion
in the Baltic Sea.

I tell him it was
an environmental mission.

It was an environmental mission.

Okay, and he's not going to want
to take pictures

of coastal erosion
at Coney Island?

No. The Baltic Sea's shared
by Sweden, Finland and Germany.

We were on an environmental
mission for Finland.

Yes, sir.

And that's what
we've come up with?

It's what we're starting with.

We'll see how it goes.

Set up the call.

( door opens )

Sorry about that.

That's Teddy Roosevelt's
Nobel Prize.

Yeah.

Don't forget to
sign this thing.

Th-They just
had a whole...

Yeah.

I'm sorry, tell me
again why you left
the Solicitor's Office.

Lawrence Harmon brought in...

He brought in new staff.

Um, you've already
talked with Judy Wells?
Yes.

And Oliver Babish?

We met for a few hours
the day before yesterday

and again for 45 minutes
this morning.

They made you fill out
the psychological part
of the questionnaire.

Yes.

Question 1:
A) I do not feel sad,

B) I feel sad,

C) I am sad all the time,
and I can't snap out of it,

D) I am so sad or unhappy
that I want to kill myself.

You chose A) I do not feel sad.

Yes.
Good.

Ever?

No.

No, you don't ever
feel sad or no...?

No, there are times
when I feel sad.

Yet you checked the
first box. Why's that?

It said "I do not feel sad,"

and I didn't at the time
I checked it.

Okay.

This'll just take
another minute or so.

WILL:
Dollar for every card
that hits the fifth row?

C.J.:
I'm locking the door.
there's still some press around.

Five dollars if
you hit the sixth.

There's a spot
on the Earth where
the temperature

is exactly the same
as it would be

if you drilled
through the Earth

to the other side.
No, there isn't.

How about six dollars if
you do it with a face card?

Yes, there is,
and it's called the antipode.

And if that's true,
then why can't it be

that you could stand an egg
on end at the equinox?

'Cause you can't ever.

And I say that neither of you
can hit the fifth row.

At the same time?

On three.

( loud bang )

Get down!

Get down.
Somebody's shooting!

Stay down.

Stay still.

( door slams open )

Is everybody all right in here?

We're all right.
Miss Cregg?

We're all right.
Three shots, one hit.

Straight from the sidewalk,
straight shot.

Is the President
in the Oval Office?

You need to wait outside.

PRESIDENT:
He's on?

Yes, sir.

Let's go.

Mr. President,
this is President Bartlet.

Mr. President.
What the hell?

Step away from the windows,
please.

Okay, you know what, I'm
going to have to call you back.

Oval's secure.

Bamboo shoot's ready.

Bamboo-- they want me
to get into the motorcade.

RON:
Mr. President.
What's going on?

You all right, sir?
I'm all right.

These people are all
code word and higher.

I was on the phone
with Chigorin.
The translator.

He's got code
word clearance.

Three shots were fired
from the street,

at least one of them hitting
the Press Briefing Room.

We've got the suspect
in custody as well as
a high-powered rifle.

Was anyone in the room?

C.J., Toby and Will Bailey.

Where are they?

They're fine.
Sir, you've got to stay here.

Nobody was hurt?

RON:
They're fine.
Sir.

You all right?
Yeah.

What about you?
We're fine.

Will, how many fingers
am I holding up?
Who's Will, sir?

I don't know if you've
met Ron Butterfield,

the head of my detail.

Sure.

Lieutenant Bailey,
we're glad to
see you alive,

but it's code clearance
in here,

and I need you out
of earshot, okay?
Yes sir.

Where's Charlie?
He's somewhere
in the building.

We're holding people
where they are right now.

But if he's heard
what happened,

he's going to be trying
to get here.

AGENT:
We've got to hold everybody
for a moment so that we can...

No, I'm telling you,
if Charlie heard

there were bullets, he's going
to overpower who's ever...

Sorry, Mr. President.

Come here.

It's bulletproof glass
in the windows, okay?

You want to kill me,
you're going to have to do it

from inside the building.

Thank you, Mr. President.

You guys all right?

BOTH:
Yeah.
I'm surprised
your guys managed

to keep Fiderer in her chair.

I would have thought she'd be
the first one through the...

No, here we are.

Are you all right,
Mr. President?

No one was hurt.

Someone shot at the Press Room
from the sidewalk.

C.J. went there
with Toby and Will.

Will's sitting outside,

and Toby and C.J.
are standing right there.

Ron, someone's going to
report this, I hope.

Yes, ma'am.

Thank you, Mr. President.

I'm going to need to take
your blood pressure

in a few minutes.
Yeah.

Thank you.

LEO:
Ron, there were two incidents

of terrorist activity
earlier today.

A bomb in Malaysia
and another in Berlin.

This is just a crazy guy, Leo.

That was just a third

on the phone.
In Guam.

The Head of the Office
of Insular Affairs

was picked off.
Come on.

By a sniper, Mr. President.

Shut it down. Crash it.

Crash the building. Over.

We're crashed.

This is the Oval Office.
Crash the West Wing.

by Secret Service agents
and Park Police.

Witnesses say the shooter
never entered the grounds,

but at least one bullet appears

to have struck the window
of a White House Office...

All right,
then here it is.

"An indeterminate number
of shots were fired

at the White House at...

I said I thought
it was three shots,

but I want for the agents to...

Okay, "At 9:23 p.m.,
striking the Press Briefing..."

The police have confirmed that
the weapon was a modified M-16.

We haven't confirmed
any ballistics.

Tell your friends
to stop saying it was an M-16.

All right, the President
was in the Oval Office.

We've initiated
a standard lockdown procedure

and are back to conducting
the business of the nation.

Again, there are no
confirmed reports

of the shooter's identity
or background...
I'll ask him.

He wants to know

if the President wants
to say something funny.

"That's twice in four years.

Some of you guys must
really be mad at me"?

Something funnier than that,
but yeah.

I'll see you later.

Yeah.

You're getting to
see a show tonight.

Everything all right?
Yeah.

What happened?

A guy shot at the
building a couple
times with a rifle.

Somebody shot
at the White House?

Yeah.
From where?

The street--
Pennsylvania Avenue.

Was anyone hurt?
Hm?

Was anyone hurt?

No, but we're in
a crash. A lockdown.

They're not going
to let you leave
the West Wing.
I heard.

You know, I thought I heard
what sounded like gunshots

while we were talking before,
but I didn't...

Did you hear the shots?

No, but I heard

a brass quintet playing
"The First Noel,"

so I just assumed
somebody somewhere
was locked and loaded.

You know, not for nothing,
but the people that I talk to

don't believe that story,

and the people that
you'd like, don't care.

Uh, they told me you
were just here tonight.

Do you have to
catch a plane?

The shuttle.
I'll get the next one.

Does this happen often?

Well, we don't know
what "this" is yet.

We know that somebody shot
at the building, though, right?

Yeah. Yeah.

No, that's the first time
it's happened to us anyway.

They have a suspect?

Yeah.

Is he white?

I don't know.

They suspect terrorism?

Well, he was shooting
a modified M-16.

It was terrorism.

I meant terrorism
directed at...

I think you know
what I mean.

I have no earthly idea
why he shot at us,

nor for that matter
do I have any reason
to believe it was a he.

That's my assistant, Donna.

Yeah, we met before.

Excuse me a second.

So what's been going on?

You were in the mess?

They kept me down there
till just now.

C.J.'s all right?

Yeah.
Where were you?

I was in here.

You want anything?
No.

You know, I'm going to get you
some water or something.

I'm all right.

All right.

So, what do you
think of this guy?

I don't know. I haven't been
talking to him that long.

Okay.

I'm going to...

I'll be around here.

He's-He's well-qualified,
that's for sure.

He's personable,
and he's confident...

But?

It's the strangest feeling.

It's like a...
really good baseball player

is standing in the other team's
locker room for the first time.

You're the baseball player?

He's the baseball player.

In the other guy's
locker room?

Yeah.

I don't understand.

Are you writing poetry
about this now?

You asked me what
I thought of him so far.

I know.

Can I say something?

Can I call
Stanley Keyworth

and tell him
maybe you're going to
be calling him later?

I'm fine.

I was in here.
I didn't even see it.

All right.

I'm not going anywhere.

I'm sorry.
What were we talking about?

You don't have any information
about the suspect.

Right.

( sighs )

( chuckles softly )

I got a letter today
that said, uh...

"You're a lying liar.

You lie almost as well
as Barflet."

You know, black-white,

rich-poor, north-south,
odd-even.

There may not be anything
anymore that outpaces

the hatred the right
feels for the left

or the tonnage of disrespect
the left feels for the right.

Donna got a letter
yesterday that said,

"I'm collecting all the guns
you've banned,

and there's a bullet with your
name on it in each one." Donna.

The guy's decided to focus
his wrath on Donna.

He's never met Donna
or spoken to her,

and he's never met anyone
who's met Donna

or spoken to her.

How's it possible?

How's it possible
that he hates her so much?

How can you not
like Donna?

She's from Wisconsin.

Anyway,

20,000 specific threats are made
against U.S. targets every year,

and with all that,
it's still the ones

who don't give you
advance notice

that you're worried about.

I asked about terrorism
before because of the lockdown.

Procedurally, it'd be the kind
of thing they'd be likely to do

if there'd been other incidents
in the last few hours.

A bomb in Malaysia.

Another one in Berlin
a few hours ago.

We might as well
use this time

for the interview.

REPORTER:
...saying in a statement

from White House Press Secretary
C.J. Craig

that an indeterminate
number of shots

were fired
at the White House at 9:23 p.m.

You can stand the
egg on the equinox

because that's when
the sun's gravity

is lined up directly
with the Earth's.

Draw a line from the center
of the Earth to the Sun,

and at anytime
someplace

on Earth is on that line.
Then maybe for us...

C.J., try it.
Take an egg. It doesn't work.

That's 'cause it's not...

BOTH:
the exact moment...
Yes.

What is the exact moment
of the equinox?
I don't know. Midnight?

Midnight where?
All right, maybe it isn't
the exact moment of the equinox.

Maybe it's at some point
during the equinox

and you just have
to keep trying,

but I've seen it.

Are we playing again?

I'll get Ed and Larry.

Donna, would you tell Josh
we're back on?

Yes, sir.

( chips clacking )

Did you know

that a day on the moon
and a year on the moon

are the same thing?

I did.

I thought my reflexes,

before in the Press Room
were cat-like.

The Sit Room Watch
Officer has the Kremlin.

PRESIDENT:
You guys playing again?

Yeah, the game started up.

President Chigorin,
it's Jed Bartlett again.

I'm sorry about
being abrupt before,

but I'll bet you if turn on
CNN International right now

you'll see...

CHIGORIN ( translated ):
My goodness.

There was a shooting
at the White House.

Yeah, there you so.
It's not a big deal,

but they've shut us down
for a little bit.

Well, I'm glad
no one was hurt.

By the way,
you know

when they crashed the building,
they don't crash all of it.

The Situation Room still works.

Yes, sir, I'm sure.

Mr. President,
a little while ago

an unmanned B-UAV drone crashed,

we think somewhere
inside Kaliningrad,

as a matter of fact.

Apparently, they don't respond
you know,

quite the way you'd like

when there's a sudden shift
in the weather.

Mr. President,
I wasn't told

of a military mission
over Kaliningrad.

Well, like I say,

it was a UAV.

It was taking satellite pictures
of coastal erosion

in the Baltic Sea.

The Finns know about this.

We'd like to send

a special operations team

ten kilometers west
of Borsakova to retrieve it.

Well, Mr. President,

like yourself,
I campaigned on the environment.

I'm sorry, sir?

I campaigned
on the environment, sir.

Are you getting
that translation right?

Yes, sir.

You campaigned on
the environment, Mr. President.

Coastal erosion
in the Baltic Sea.

I'll take a look
at those pictures

and send them to you
with your UAV.

Well, the problem is,

our UAVs have
a self-detonating capability,

and our people know how
to disarm it,

and I wouldn't want
to put your guys at risk.

Well, given
the circumstances,

I'm sure
your experts wouldn't mind

talking through the steps

with our experts.

It's proprietary technology,
Peter.

To view
coastal erosion?

I know. It seems...

Sir, I'm going to interrupt
this call at this time

to speak with my
counterintelligence attaché.

Yes, Mr. President.

Thank you, sir.

This isn't working anymore.

ED:
Anything wild?

C.J.:
Just the dealer.

Four, no help.

Six, possible straight.

Heart, possible flush.

Jack, no help.

And the Dave of Love
for a pair of tens.

Tens bet.

You know, you're
particularly upbeat

for someone who's been
shot at twice in four years.

Am I?
Yes.

That's 'cause I've got
faith there, mi compadre.

Faith?

The substance
of things

hoped for and the evidence
of things not seen.

Yeah, but I think
what he's asking...

Bump ten.

I think what he's asking is

why on most other nights
do you think

the world's going to hell
in a hula hoop, but tonight...?

We dip twice and
eat gefilte fish?

Suzy Creamcheese,
do not attempt the hagaddah.

I know how to bless
the soup, too.

I'll raise your raise.

Out.

It's just the
two of us.

Faith in what?

In us.

The people in this room?

And many, many, many others.

LARRY:
Will, are you

missing your plane?

Not yet.
It's a military flight.

Doesn't leave
till about 12:30.

What's in Cheyenne?

A number of us

are being sent out there
to investigate

something that happened
a few days ago.

What happened?

You know, it's one
of those things

that sounds worse
when you say it out loud

'cause it makes people
kind of nervous.

What happened?

Uh, two guys
failed to follow
through on an order

to fire their rockets
at what was thought to be

an incoming ballistic missile
from North Korea.

Turns out it was
a good thing they didn't,

Outer space.
Yeah.

What the hell happened?

Two launch crew officers
in Minuteman III silos

picked up a signal
of an incoming projectile.

The speed, arc and trajectory
of which suggested

that it was headed
to New London, Connecticut.

From North Korea.

Yes.

Why do we think

at this point
that North Korea's

attacking the East coast
of the United States?

There are transcripts
from the silo

to show that surprise
was expressed at that.

I would think.

The base was already

at DEFCON Delta, so
the launch crew initiated

Response Code Orion
which calls for

the first in a series of steps
to arm their 50 Minutemen.

What's in New London?

Trident.

The gum?

The nuclear submarines.

50 Minutemen they're arming,

and is anyone saying
this doesn't make sense?

The two guys
in the silo.

The launch sequence went on
for two minutes

before they had confirmation
it was a meteor.

But the two guys
were debating

with Airborne Launch Control,
and the Cheyenne Mountain

Operations Center,

and that gets sticky.

This is missile defense.

This stuff has to work.

And they're sending in

a team of lawyers
to look into it?

Yeah, but we're scrappy.

( laughs )

A meteor fell
from the sky,

the result being that two guys

are going to get
court-martialed.

The only two guys who apparently
thought it was strange

that North Korea would attack
submarines in Connecticut

instead of say,
San Diego or Hawaii.

And if it had been
a real attack,

would they still have been doing

point/counterpoint
with NORAD?

( chuckles )

We failed both on a mechanical
and human level.

So tell me again
what you have faith in.

Us.

Why?

Because, with what

little time he has,
Will is going to Wyoming

to defend one of these guys,

and I don't think it is
failing on a human level.

( snickers )

I got ace-high flush.
Give me your money.

I've got tens full
of queens. Give me yours.

CHARLIE:
Hey.

WILL:
Who's out there?

Zoey.

Oh, hey.
Hi.

This is a coincidence.

I was just stepping
outside for some air.

They just let me in
a few minutes ago.

Everything's fine.
Yeah, I just
wanted to check.

I was just going
to call you.

Were you?
Yeah.

To say you wanted to get
back together?

To make sure
you were alive.

Well, that's a step
in my direction.

You want to come inside
for a minute?

I have to get back
and study.

One of my finals
is tomorrow.

Can you believe you're
graduating in two weeks?

I can't.

That went fast.
It really did.

Is Chef Boyardee around?

Now, why do you have
to do that?

I was asking after him.

We were having
a perfectly nice...
Sorry.

And on tonight of all nights,

when we should be
thinking about...

Why is tonight
different than others?
You were shot at.

Well, not me personally, but I
say all the more reason to...

I'm going to France
for three months.

When?

After graduation.

For three months?

Yeah.

For three months?

It's 12 weeks.

When did you come up
with this plan?

He asked me
a couple days ago.

His family has a farmhouse

in the middle of a vineyard
near Avignon.

No press,
no politics.

It's what I want to do.

I think it's a great thing
to do.

I just don't know why
you're doing it with him.

Well, I don't know why
you have to...

You've been out
with plenty of women

since we broke up,
and each time...

I have not.

You don't think I know
when you go out?

Every college student
in this city

wants to tell me
something I don't know.

And every time you've gone out,
I've been supportive.

Supportive how?
I didn't even know you knew.

That's how.

Hey, you just
told me.

I'm not the one using
the student bodies

of GW, Georgetown, AU
and Catholic University

as intelligence
gathering sources.

And UVA and Johns Hopkins, pal.
You're easy to spot.

Look...

People like giving me
information.

What do you want me to do?

I want you to not go to France
with Jean Paul.

Why don't you like him?

Because...

It's been four years

in the White House,

and another being
the daughter of
a candidate.

Eight years as Governor.

My grades get printed
in the paper.

My boyfriends
are in the paper.

I live and die with my parents'
successes and failures.

And so do you.

Sometimes even more
than me.

And Jean Paul doesn't.

He's happy.

He's... just... happy.

That's 'cause
he's got $500 million

and no conscience.

No, it isn't.

He cares about things.

And one of them is me.

And none of them are this,

and that's appealing to me
right now.

Yeah, I can understand that.

I got to go study.

Sorry you got shot at again.

Thanks.

TRANSLATOR:
Mr. President...

Peter...
Unless there
was a typhoon...

I understand.
I meant...

He's yelling at me
pretty loud now.

I wasn't referring
to the change in weather, sir.

the National Radar
Center

does not find any UAVs
in the area you discussed.

It's Leo again.

The UAVs are designed to fly
below military radar

simply because the closer we
get, the better the pictures.

I understand.

Now, what were you
taking pictures of?

Coastal erosion
in the Baltic...

There is simply no way
an American UAV

could have been
near the Finnish part...

He's yelling pretty loud
at Leo now.

Sir...
...of the Baltic Sea

and end up crashing
in Kaliningrad

unless there was a typhoon.

Now, are you
telling me...?

Sir...

We have experts, too.

And an S&R team

is looking
for the UAV.

Don't do that, Peter.

You shouldn't
do that, sir.

We weren't flying
in your airspace.

Kaliningrad is
in my airspace, Leo,

and an S&R team
has been sent

ten kilometers west to see
if they can help you find it.

Well, they're going
to see it

'cause in five minutes

I'm telling the President
to blow it up.

Feel free.

We were taking pictures
of Kaliningrad.

Say that again, please.

We were taking pictures
of Kaliningrad.

We take pictures of black market
nuclear materials

being moved out the backdoors
of depositories and into trucks.

The materials are being sold
to nongovernmental elements,

and, well,
that's what we were doing.

Rogue engineers,
unemployed military scientists,

ex-KGB-- it's just as big
a problem for you

as it is for us,

but you're not dealing with it,

so we were taking pictures
of Kaliningrad.

We're going to have to trust
each other a little, Peter.

So we're going to share
the pictures we got.

Not the technology
we used to get them.

Otherwise I'm detonating it,

and neither of us
see the pictures.

We're going to have
to trust each other.

Our two countries have
stopped the world

from annihilating itself
for 60 years

because of conversations
like this one.

Why don't you talk it over.

I will.

Good.

I'd have said we
weren't spying on you--

we were spying
for you, but...

If he calls back,
we'll have a deal.

In the meantime, one hand.

Bring your wallet.

Excuse me.

Hi.

Did you just come by
to look at him?

I just wanted
to let you know

that Stanley's
on his cell phone

if you want
to talk to him.

You called him?

Just to tell him
what happened

and that you might
want to call him later.

I told you I wasn't
going to call him.

I thought you might
change your mind.
I didn't.

I'm telling you,
there's something--

a guy this qualified,
I'd know who he was.

Something's wrong.

I just figured
out what.

Come in and say hi.

You've already met Donna.

How are you?
How are you

enjoying your lockdown?

It's been a very
thorough interview.

JOSH:
It has.
We talked about his name

and New York City Department
of Transportation.

Then we talked
about inner cities and jobs

and minimum wage

and public schools
and foreign aid,

hitting all
the Democrat G-spots.

And it wasn't until now
that I realized

that there was something
I forgot to ask you.

Are you a registered Democrat?

No.

Are you a registered
Independent?

No.

Are you registered?

Yes.

You're a Republican.

Yes!
Whoa.

Joe, it's fine.

Ainsley Hayes
was a Republican.

It is not fine.

Why not?
'Cause if

you're a Republican,
then you damn well

better look like Ainsley Hayes.

He does.

He will to others.

You don't want to get a job
with your own party?

I do, I just can't.

Why?
I'm in the doghouse

with a number of people
at the National Committee.

Why?

A memo that I wrote for
the Solicitor General

arguing that the
Supreme Court should
uphold regulations

that limit soft money
donations to political
campaigns.

Oh, no, that's
the kind of thing
that's got to wind you up

in GOP jail for
the same amount of time as...

As a Democrat who speaks
out against abortion.

Right.

Why do you want to work here?
Why not the private sector?

I'm on my way
to New York.

You have something lined up?

A final interview at
Debevoise and Plimpton.

That's my father's firm.
He was a partner there.

I know.

They're going to offer you
$225,000 a year.

Is this your fallback?

They're my fallback.

Why do you want
to work here?

I like public service.
And I want to serve.

And you guys are
the only ones left.

Why haven't you signed
the questionnaire?

Because I can't.

You lied on it?

Yeah.

Which question?

75.

"Have you ever
done anything

that would reflect poorly
on the President?"

What'd you do?

I didn't vote for him.

That's really very sweet.

Not to me.

You really want
to work with us?

Yes.

You know we got shot at tonight,
on a Friday.

Yeah.

All right.

I'm recommending you to Leo.

Last card for the players.

Hurry it up, they're going to
call us back in a second.

Debbie, do something.

$50.

I'm out.
Fold.
Thank you.

Is the pastrami
from Krupin's?

Yes.

Tissue paper thin?

Yes.

Mr. President?

Damn it.
Chigorin?

Yes, sir.
They're ready for you.

Nice job.

Okay, I've searched
"equinox" and "egg,"

and the news isn't good
for the believers.

What sites did they
send you to?

ThingsThatAreWrong.com.

There's no such site.
Read it.

"This has to be
one of the silliest
misconceptions around

and it never seems to die."

They also send you
to The Apocryphal Zone

and Project Astro Utah.

There's no Web site
supporting it?
No.

And you got to ask yourself
if no one on the Internet

wants a piece of this,
just how far

from the pack have you strayed?

I could've sworn I saw it.

Ah...
Oh, now you think
you saw it.

I could've sworn.

We're back up,
everybody.

Thank you.

What's the deal
with the guy?

He was by himself.

He's not connected to anything?

No.

Just a very troubled guy

Anyway, thank you

for your cooperation.

I'm heading to Andrews.

Have a safe flight.

I'm cashed out.

Anyone need a ride?
I'm going home.

You headed home?

In just a minute.