All language subtitles for The.West.Wing.S04E08.WEBRip.x264-FGT

SAM:
I did something last week.

I went to see a guy
named Will Bailey.

He ran Horton Wilde's
campaign in Orange County.

His widow
wanted to know

what Democrat was
going to stand in

for her husband,
should he win

and I said...
You're kidding.

Something weird's going on.
We're winning.

C.J.:
We've got some news.

What?
You're going to win
New Hampshire.

REPORTER:
CBS is ready
to declare Delaware...

( staff cheering and
whistling )

JOSH:
Horton Wilde, who's dead

is losing
by 88 votes.

TOBY:
Plus, there was
an actual storm.

Anyway, we're going to be
up all night with these.

It's going to be fun!

God bless you all!

God bless the United

States of America!

( supporters cheering wildly)

( lively indistinct
conversation, music playing )

WOMAN ( on TV ):
...and we still have--
I want to remind our viewers--

we still have
three House races undecided

as we've been reporting.

Those would be Tennessee second,
the New York 22nd

and the race that's been dubbed
Lazarus 47 in some circles

the race for California's
47th Congressional District

between the six-term incumbent

Republican Chuck Webb
and Democrat Horton Wilde

who passed away
some three weeks ago

but whose name remains
on the ballot.

George, which is stranger?

That a Democrat
is competitive in Orange County

or that the Democrat
in question is...?

I don't mean to make light
of this, of course

but the candidate passed away.

They're both
pretty strange, Julie

but for a Democrat
to win in the 47th

he's going to have to have
something going for him

and this was it.

JULIE:
Martin, how important

were the candidates'
performances in the debate?

I'll tell you how important.

On the day before the debate

the President held
a three-point lead in most polls

and that's within
the margin of error--

a statistical tie.

Among those who said
they were undecided

73% said they made up their mind
based on the debates

and 69% of that population
went for the President.

And that's how...

That's how
the President won.

Absolutely.
( chuckling )

JULIE:
What is Governor Ritchie
thinking...?

SAM:
He said...
what he said was this--

he said,
"A probable impossibility

is preferable
to an improbable possibility."

The impossible is preferable
to the improbable.

What did he mean?

He meant it's okay to have
a broomstick sing and dance

but you shouldn't
turn on the radio

and hear the news report
you need to hear.

You want some cake?

No.

You sure?

What kind?

Cake.

They have flavors.

I don't know.

It was a confluence of events
that I'm saying

if you pitched it
to a Hollywood movie producer

they'd tell you
that Aristotle says

a probable impossibility

is preferable
to an improbable possibility.

It doesn't quite
sound like them

but I understand
your point.

The Midwest, the RNC exits,
a dead candidate

a rainstorm...?

It's Aristotle
all over the place.

I'm going to turn these off.

Why don't you head out
into the party?

Everyone's asking for you.

You really don't know
what kind...?

It's cake.

It's cake.

I talked to the woman.

She had tears in her voice.

Her husband loved the President

admired his integrity.

Yes, we're big
on integrity.

By the way, when I said
I'd run in his place

it's not like I meant it.

Let's go to the party.

There are
televisions everywhere.

You'll know as soon
as they're ready

to report something
from the 47th.

You're right.

You're right!

JULIE:
And we're ready
to report some news

from the House race
in the California 47th

where the impossible
seems to be happening

and we send it to Gail Mackee

who's standing by
in Newport Beach.

Gail?

GAIL ( speaking loudly):
Julie, I'm at the Hyatt
in Newport Beach

with the Horton Wilde campaign

and the place is going
absolutely berserk.

Kay Wilde, the widow...
Bonnie, Ginger

get me Will Bailey.

Get me Kay Wilde
very quickly, please.

...of the Democratic challenger
just received a phone call

from Congressman Chuck Webb.

He's conceding the election,
thanking Mrs. Wilde

for a well-fought
campaign...
Get me Will
Bailey, please.

Got to get him!

...and looking forward,
he says he looks forward

to running
in a special election.

Gail, is there any word
on who the Democrats might run

in the special election?

Get him.
Got to get him.

GAIL:
No, there isn't.
Not yet.

But I can report
a rumor

that's been making
its way around...

Of course you can.
Why not?

...that former
Orange County resident

and current White House
Senior Advisor Sam Seaborn

will seek the seat.

BERNIE:
And the plot thickens.

JULIE:
Sam Seaborn, of course

an architect
of the President's first victory

as well as his--

I think we have to start calling
it a landslide-- tonight.

They're talking
about someone else.

I'm told that
we've got a picture

we're going to throw up
on the screen.

BERNIE:
Julie, I have to interrupt.

I just have to say
that if this rumor is true...
Yeah, okay.

They're over
in the thing.

...view the California 47th
the same way

the Democrats view
the New York 16th.

They see it as unlosable.

Hi.

I mean, the Democrats
have not only

never won the 47th, they've
never even been a factor.

JULIE:
So, who is this Sam Seaborn?

He has been an integral part
of the President's

inner circle since joining
the Bartlet campaign

after several years
at a New York law firm

Gage Whitney Pace.

He is a graduate...

Josh, Sam Donaldson

from the ABC Nightly
Newsprogram's

on the phone.

He'd like to know
if the President
is endorsing Sam.

Toby, is the President
endorsing Sam? Hmm?

Is the President
endorsing Sam?

I don't know.

He's asleep,
but let's go ask him.

All right.

All right, look, this is
extremely easy to explain.

First of all... okay...

How familiar are the three
of you with Aristotle?

You agreed to run?!
Sam, what the hell...?

I said it
for the widow.

She wanted a name
for election night

and I said, "Use my name"

not thinking for a second
it was ever going to be

a practical option.

Can I ask, is your office now
the House of the Rising Sun?

Yes.

You did it for the widow.

Yes. And for a guy
I met named Will Bailey

who was running
the campaign

and worked his ass off

and never backed off

and by the way,
navigated a dead liberal

Democrat to a win
against Chuck Webb.

500 races tonight.

That was pretty impressive

though it was an Aristotelian
confluence of events

that could only happen to me.

( Sam sighing )

I have to talk
to the widow.

I would actually talk
to the President first.

Really?

He's going to get
it first thing
in the morning

There's a seat in play.

He's going to be
asked about it

and he can't say, you know

"My God, I have
no earthly idea

what you're
talking about."

Okay. Yeah, all right.

* Love me, my love

* And say you're mine *

* Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh *

* Kiss me and hold me tight...

PRESIDENT:
I don't want to intimidate you

but it turns out
I'm the first Democrat

in 20 years to make a clean
sweep of the Plains states

and I'm not just talking
about Iowa and Nebraska.

ABBEY:
Are you trying to
turn me on now?

Yeah.

All right.

I won the Dakotas.

The Badlands.

The Black Hills.

But let's go down, way down,
to the deep South

and the humid bayou
of Louisiana

and its nine electoral votes.

What manner of man
it must take to win the state

which, by the way,
is the only one operating

under the Napoleonic Code
of France

and I still don't know
what that's all about.

But back to me...

Hon, this is, like,
nerd hot talk?

Who's your
Commander in Chief?

You are.

Yes.

And do the ladies like him?

Oh, yes.

To the tune of 58%.

( knocking )

Yeah?

I'm sorry, sir.

I thought we had

an understanding with regard

to tonight and interruptions,
Charlie.

I thought we were men.

Yes. I'm sorry,
but Sam said...

Sam needs to see me?
Yes, sir.

It's, like, what

1:00 in the morning?

Yes, sir.

Well, let's
send him in.

Good evening,
Mr. President.

Good to see you.

I hope I'm not here
at a bad time.

No. What would
make you say that?

Actually, it looks as if
I couldn't have picked

a worse time.

No, no, you could have,
and I'm not going to
take any chances

so let's do it now.

Horton Wilde
won in the 47th.

I know.

There's going to be
a special election.

Yeah.
And, uh, to make

a long story short

you might be asked
first thing tomorrow

if you're endorsing me.

Am I?

Well, I'm not really running.

Then I'm behind you 100%.

Look...

Man, is everything
all right?

Yeah. I made a promise
to a widow in a moment of...

Hello, Mr. President.

Hey, Mrs. Bartlet.

Oh, my God.

PRESIDENT:
Yeah, look, honey

Sam stopped by.

Hi, Sam.

Hi.

Eyes front, mister.

You know, sir,
I'll have this taken care of

in the next few hours
anyway.

You don't even need
to worry about it.

You sure
you're okay?
Yes, sir.

Okay.

This Dean Martin?

Yeah.
Good.

Thank you.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Could you keep trying
Will Bailey, please?

Yeah.

* It's a shame... *

TOM:
Congratulations!

TOBY:
Hey, you, too, Tom.

And congratulations on the
other thing there, Papa.

Yeah. Any idea
where Mama is?

Uh, right over there.

ANDY:
The Great State
of Maryland!

ALL ( shouting ):
Maryland!

( crowd cheering )

Andy! Andy, don't
drink that...

Mmm! It's ginger ale,
crazy boy.

Yeah, okay.
Ginger ale can be bad

according
to the latest studies.

It can be very...

My man got the President
reelected tonight!

( all cheering )

That was very pleasant.

( Andy chuckles )

Can I talk to
you a second?

Yeah.

You won by 85%
of the vote.

I don't really understand
the 15%, but what the hell.

Yeah, well, as long as
you scraped by with a win.

( chuckles )

Look, a-a statement.

We've already been
through this.

Roll Call has it.

That's what we
have to deal with.

I don't.

Congresswoman Wyatt,
are you pregnant?

None of your business.

You can't withhold that
from your constituents.

there was a congressional
investigation, and it

almost detonated his presidency?

You're worried about me?

I just won by 85%.

I'm not worried about you.

I know.

You're worried about
a senior counselor

fathering kids
out of wedlock.

Yeah. You know what?

Single moms are
a lot more sympathetic

than deadbeat dads,
so I wouldn't gallivant.

You're not a deadbeat dad.

I know that,
and you know that

but if I can't protect
my kids

their mom and the President
all at the same time

then I've got to quit my job,
so can you help me out?

Yes.

You'll make a statement?

No, but when they ask me

who the father is

I won't tell them
that either.

I'm the father!

And of course you're at
leisure to tell them that.

85% of what kind of backward
population votes for this woman?

The good people
of Maryland.

Maryland!

ALL:
Maryland!

( chuckling )

* There's a somebody
I'm longing to see... *

LEO:
Women? Yes, indeed, ma'am. 58%.

But let's take a trip
down Louisiana way, huh?

Where we find it's
nine electoral votes go to...

Leo?

Yeah?

If you walk me
through every demographic

I think the night's
not going to have

the kind of happy ending
you're hoping for.

Got it.

( chuckles )

Good tip.

Keep 'em coming.

( giggling )

Colonel.

Yes, ma'am.

( chuckling ):
No.

WHITCOMB:
Hey.

How you doing?

Pretty good.
You got a second?

Yeah.

* Someone to watch...

There's gunfire in Caracas
and Merida and Valencia.

There's movement
in the Acuellar

Coroico, Ciudad Alto
and Parador Negro bases.

What about GV?

They stopped broadcasting.

Are you ready to brief?

15 minutes?

Yeah.

Can you hang around
for a minute?

There's about to be
a coup in Venezuela.

Yeah.

Thanks.

* Won't you tell her please
to put on some speed... *

* And, God, I know I'm one *

* There is...
Shh!

Hey, hey, hey,
with the singing
of the song!

JULIE ( on TV ):
Walk us through,
if you can, the tea leaves.

What were the indicators
for you?

High gas prices,
and instability
in the Gulf region

and so, we recommended
to the President

that he make energy
a hot topic for the campaign.

JULIE:
And obviously,
a winning strategy.

A lot of people say
this is a President

who, more than anyone
since Truman maybe,
ran his own campaign.

Is that true?

Yeah.
We all give advice

but, uh, this President
calls his own shots.

Does anyone know
who this is?

I don't... I think he won
the election.

( laughter )
It sounds like
he did very well.

I think that's Chris Whitaker.

It is.
He's a pollster.

He's a pollster that Bruno
contracted out of Illinois.

JULIE:
...enjoy that Jed Bartlet
packs a strong...

Excuse me.

Don't break things.

Do you realize, you won all the
Plains states but the Dakotas?

BRUNO:
Hmm. We won the Dakotas.

I didn't even realize that.

Yep, we won the Dakotas tonight,
the Badlands.

Bruno?
Sitting Bull is buried
up there.

Hello.
( clears throat ):
Excuse me.

Th... uh, this is, uh,
Ashley

assistant to, uh,
Jane Zalaznick

at the Women's Leadership
Coalition.

C.J.
Nice to meet you.

You got a second?

Yeah.

( mid-tempo jazz plays )

Carloads of partygoers

from the Women's
Leadership Coalition

and the Women's
Action Network

are unloading
at the Northwest
Executive Entrance.

It is time
for watermelon.

You know a guy named
Chris Whitaker?

Widdle?

Whitaker.

Whitkenstein?

Are you drunk?

A little bit.

Chris Whitaker.

Is a pollster

I contracted
for Cook County.

He was just on TV
claiming credit

for your energy strategy.

Huh?

He's claiming credit
for the energy strategy

and who knows what else.

Witkenstein?
Bruno...

What do I care?

I think you should
talk to some reporters.

Nah.
You are entitled
to the status you've earned.

The only thing
I need status for...

I'm doing right now.

I'm going to be watching
this guy.

No, you don't have
to watch him...
We owe you, Bruno.

No, I got paid.
But thanks.

( whispering ):
I'm going to talk
to Ashley now.

I'm going to be watching
this guy.

I'm going to be
talking to Ashley.

Okay.

Donna.
Yeah.

You might want to tell Josh
that a few carloads of women...

Yeah, he knows.
Okay.

WOMAN:
Josh...

Hang on. A couple people
from the Women's Leadership

Coalition just...

Yes. Hello.

Hello.

It's a target-rich
environment

and I don't want to cramp
your style.

I just wanted to stash
my coat in your office.

Sure.

Come here.

Congratulations.

Thanks.

You owe me ten dollars
on the Delaware 1st

ten dollars on Iowa 5th.

We pushed across
the Mountain states

and I lost Arkansas and
the Georgia Legislature

but you went 20 on the
Michigan gubernatorial.

How you doing
on the night?

Right now,
I'm only up 90

but there's
a waste disposal

bond issue in
Jasper, Alabama

that's going to put me
in a new pair of Manolo's

if it breaks my way.

So the guys at Lexington
and Concord

they didn't die in vain.

Yeah, no way.

Want to hear
the funniest thing?

A week ago, Sam told
Horton Wilde's widow

that he'd run
in his place.
I know.

You heard?
Yeah.

All these events
conspired to...

like the DNC gave up
on the race

so the RNC left town,
leaving no one

to read the exits...

You want me
to open your door?

I can do it.

The President
won the Midwest

and there was depressed
Republican turnout
in the district

'cause it was never a race...

Will Bailey also.

I keep hearing that name.

I've helped him raise money.

For a dead candidate,
of course you did.

Anyway, Sam's desperately trying
to get ahold of the widow

so he can have the worst
conversation of his life.

He's... just going
to have to say...

He should do it; that's actually
what I came here to tell you.

What do you mean?
He should run.

He'll get killed.

Yeah, but tomorrow morning,
you're going to face

a very angry minority who
don't feel the President

did enough to make
them the majority.

Angry House Democrats.
I'm shivering, hold my hand.

I'm saying...
You know what,
the President's coattails

were long enough to elect
a Democrat out of Orange County

with literally no pulse.

Any congressman
complaining...

Will be smoothed over...
Who has to...

Will be smoothed over
if the President sends
a top lieutenant

still shining from victory
on a suicide mission

to Disney's
California Adventure.

You're ahead 90 bucks?

And it's still very early.

All right,
give me your coat.

What?

I didn't say anything.

Okay, your coat
will be here.

I'm going to go
collect money.

Enjoy.

( muttering )

( muttering )

Donna!

How'd you know I was out there?

I felt you lurking.

I want to try to find a guy
named Will Bailey

with the Wilde campaign
in Newport Beach.

Yeah.

Congratulations.
Way to go, Will.

Thanks. Thanks
for your hard work.

Don't know who you are.

Will!

I'm going to sleep.

Come back to the party!

I'm going to sleep.

Now?
Any second?

It's the greatest
night of your life

and you're
going to sleep?

Special reward.

It's the shank
of the evening

and there are all kinds
of volunteers

that want
to dance with you

and you know
what that means.

Dance? I think I do.

Are you ever going
to enjoy yourself?

I just beat Chuck Webb,
that was a pretty good time.

Yes, you did.

I'm so proud
that you're my brother.

Me, too.
I mean, me too.

You know what I mean.

You sure you don't
want to come back
for a little bit?

I can't stand up anymore.

Okay.

Sleep well.

Thanks.

Don't be wearing that dress
all in front of...

Ah, never mind.

( phone ringing )

( ringing )

( ringing )

Congratulations.

You too, Mr. Lyman.

Yeah.

It's a great night for you.

I want to talk to you
for a minute about Sam.

Uh, sure.

I wonder, though,
is there any chance

we could talk
first thing in the morning?

It's been a pretty long
few months.

I-I understand completely, Will.

Thanks.

Let me just ask you this:

What are the President's
unfavorables in the 47th?

I'm sorry?

I'm trying to get a sense
of what happens

when Sam gets tagged
with Bartlet fatigue.

No, I understand.

I just don't have the facts
and figures.

Sure.

I can call you in the morning
from the office...

I just assumed 'cause
most operatives can recite

that kind of thing, you know,
at the upper levels.

The President has a 48/42
favorable/unfavorable

"Handling of Economy," 41/51.

"Strong Leader"?

37/44.

Thank you.

Can you find Leo for me?

Yeah.

It's Donna.
I have Josh looking for him.

Thanks.

You lost?

Hey, I know you.

Yeah.

You work here?

Yeah.

You didn't
tell me that.

Let me see your slip.

I'm sure you're over
in Dr. McNally's wing.

Navigation was never my
strong area in school.

You had to study it?

Yeah, a lot.

Where'd you
go to school?

Annapolis, Maryland.

Of course, I'm sorry.

It's this way.
I'll take you.

Thanks.

Why don't you
give me a carton?

No, no.

So you guys having
a party or something?

Uh-huh, yeah.
We won an election.

I heard.
Congratulations.

Isn't this a strange time

to be moving
into your office?

I'm the 2 a.m. Watch Commander
in the Situation Room tonight.

Why didn't you tell me
you worked for the White House?

I didn't want you
to feel awkward
about voting for Ritchie.

I didn't vote for Ritchie.

'Cause you traded with me

but your intent was to vote
for Ritchie.

Yes.

And I didn't want you
to feel awkward about it.

I appreciate that.

So why the hell were you
going to vote for Ritchie?

My role here
isn't political.

Is that what they told you
to say if somebody asked?

Well, people
usually don't ask.

That's true.

So why were you going
to vote for Ritchie?

I think this is
my door, right here.

It is.

( sighs )

( sighs )

Uh, would you mind?

Oh.

Okay.

It's freezing in here.

I appreciate your help.

Thanks a lot.

You bet.

So, why were you vo...

Pentagon procurement.

What about it?

The President campaigned
saying he'd roll it back.

He wasn't talking
about your job, or weapons.

He was talking about...

$500 screwdrivers.
( phone ringing )

Excuse me.

Lieutenant Commander Reese.

I'm just asking
out of curiosity.

I mean, you're not
in favor of...

Thank you.

They're calling me
to work early.

What's going on?

I don't know.
Sounds like there's

about to be a coup
d'etat in Venezuela.

Well, you should go
do that then.

Yeah.

Yeah, be careful.

Uh, thanks, but I'm
just going downstairs.

Still.

Okay.

There's a cable intercept

out of Punto Fijo
to Miraflores.

A request to
speak to Ignacio?

Yeah, and there's
a cellular intercept

has General Martinez
at the palace

calling General Reyes
at the refinery.
And?

The request was denied.

Yeah, that wasn't really

a high percentage
phone call, was it?

No.

Leo, this is Lieutenant
Commander Jack Reese.

He's Nancy McNally's
new man in uniform.

Welcome, Commander.

When did you start?

He started about
ten seconds ago, Leo.

This is his first night.

All right,
let me say first

this is not a drill.

Yes, sir.

Major Carson
from SOUTHCOM

Adam Hallridge,
CIA Venezuela Desk

Troop, Assistant Secretary
for Latin American Affairs

and some other people.

Ignacio's two top generals--
Martinez and Rojas--

threw their support behind Luna
and Martinez placed Ignacio

and his vice president
under arrest.

Does their control
extend beyond Caracas?

No.

Ignacio's got the PDVSA refinery
at Punto Fijo.

LEO:
There's 63 Americans
in the refinery.

WHITCOMB:
Mr. McGarry
needs you to cull

the pertinent
intelligence data

and put together
a two-page briefing

he can give
the President.

So, how much time do you need?

Um...

three hours?

( laughing )

20 minutes, son.

( sighs )

TOBY:
"My ex-husband,
Toby Ziegler, and I

"are expecting twins in May.

"We thank you for your
good wishes

and ask for privacy
while we consider...
reconciliation."

Two sentences.

Actually, that's good.

Yeah.
It is.

Harmless.

Yes.

I'll tell you what.

I'll issue that statement
and that'll be that.

Thank you.

Okay.

Toby, wake up.

Wake up, time
to go to school.

Oh,
what is the problem?

You raise your voice
to a pregnant woman?

I didn't raise my voice.

It was in your inflection.

Was it?

It is not a matter

of national security
that the public know.

I do not waive
my Fourteenth
Amendment rights.

Fourteenth Amendment

protects you from State action,
not the media

who, by the way,
have their own amendment.

There are two dozen
members of Congress
over the age of 80.

They work on Tuesdays,
and no one tonight

is questioning
their job performance.

First of all,
three of those guys

are outstanding Congressmen.

Second of all, their
constituents knew they were 80

when they voted for them.

You think I wouldn't
have been elected

if the Maryland Fifth
knew I was pregnant?

The people who elected you
aren't the ones

who are going to throw
the picnic.

I know.
Then what's the problem?

I can't stand
the ones who are.

You know I'm
going to get sued.

I mean, you know it.

The... Citizens League for a
Rooty-Tooty Freedom Liberty.

They'll work out of a
strip mall in Sarasota

but they'll
be curiously
well-funded.

( chuckles lightly )

You're not trying
to avoid a fight.
Nope.

You're
for
Yeah.
one.looking

You're sniffing around

for a fight.

Yes.
Not sniffing around
for one

as much as...
trying to create one.

Trying to create trouble

where none existed.

Yes.

Well... I can admire that.

Honey, have you told
the Bartlets?

No.

Why not?

( inhales )

( sighs ):
I came up with a plan
to tell them apart

in the initial
months.

I think I'll probably
dress them differently.

Oh, okay.

I was going to hang little signs
around their necks.

( chuckling )

Why haven't you told them?

I don't know.

WOMAN:
There's a thing,
"The biggest lies

are told after sex,
before..." something.

Well, I think it's helpful
if lies come before sex.

But... "The biggest lies

"come after the hunt,
before marriage

and during elections."

Mark Twain?

Nice to meet you

Bruno Gianelli.

( laughing ):
You're funny.

Yeah.

Does winning
make you funny?

Losing makes you funny.

Winning makes you handsome.

Well, you must
win an awful lot.

Bruno?

Excuse me.

I am, uh...

I'm just going to kill you.

She seems nice.

That's "The Brunette
Named Annette."

Wouldn't you just

give anything if
she was from Tibet?

I'm actually fine
with her being

from Philadelphia,
so please state your business.

Witkenstein.

I don't believe this.
It's going to be

the start of a press tour.

Don't you want to enjoy

the party?
I'm going to leak

some internal
campaign memos.

Listen, I think it's good
this guy is talking.

He doesn't know anything.
The process story

won't last as long.
I don't care.
We can...

C.J.
I know how to do this.

I can end a process story

and correct the record
at the same time.

Look at me.
What?

We won. It's over.

In a poll taken three days
after the MS announcement

the President lost to
Ritchie by nine points.

He won by 11.

You did it.

It helps when you cook
with the right food.

But at midnight

my contract with
"Bartlet for America" expired.

I'm a taxpayer now,
and I'm telling you

I've got bigger problems
than who gets credit for a win.

And I'd rather the White House
not spend time on it.

( sighs )

Okay.

Hey... if you want to
come back to my office

there's an
actual still.
I heard.

I'll be there.

Okay.

Hey, speaking of credit:

Yeah.

Nice win.

C.J., can I talk to you
for a minute?

Yeah.

When the dust settles

what's the story
going to be?

That we didn't take back
the House.

Yeah, like that
was our fault.

These people
make me crazy.

"He-he didn't do enough
down-ticket campaigning."

You have any idea
how much gumbo

that man ate?

This is what you do,
you bounce

off the subject.

Oh, shrimp.

I don't think running
for Congress is the thing you do

to change the story.

I know, but there
are real reasons.

We give Democrats in the 47th
something to get excited about.

You think he should run?

I do.

This shrimp is
incredibly good.

What are you doing here?

I'm your wingman.

Okay.

Hello.
Hey.

AMY:
Toby, I'm afraid
you didn't have

a very good night.

I bet against a Puerto Rican
for Bronx Borough President.

I deserve to lose.

And you took a
hit, ironically

on a Wisconsin referendum
to legalize gambling.

But you did win

four Omaha steaks
on the over-under

in the Texas Farm
Commissioner race.

Does the U.S. Attorney's
office know about you?

Yeah, they
have me on file.

Can we talk to
you for a minute?

Actually, I'm going to, uh

talk to the President
and First Lady.
Can it wait?

You going
to tell them?

Yeah.

Can we come?
No.

They're still up, right?

Yeah.

Jimmy Fitzsimmons won
the Boston Mayor's race

by 51 points

and believe it or not,
did not beat the spread.

I think he should do it.

( grunting )

( metal clattering )

Hey.

Hi.

Uh, do you work on
the maintenance staff?

No, I'm senior assistant

to Josh Lyman,
he's the Deputy Chief of Staff.

I noticed that the room
was cold before

so I loosened up
the radiator, but...

then, well, I guess
you could say I broke it.

But it's fine now.

It should be fine.

Well, I doubt it.

The building has maintenance,
though, doesn't it?

They're having fun at the party.

Oh.

So...

everyone's safe in Venezuela?

( sighs )

Yeah.

$500 screwdrivers
is why you didn't vote

for the President?

I work for the President.
That's a lot.

It's wasteful spending.

No, it's not.

A $400 ashtray?

( sighs )

What was that?

A $400 ashtray.

It's off the USS Greenville

a nuclear attack submarine and
a likely target for a torpedo.

When you get hit with one,
you've got enough problems

without glass flying into
the eyes of the navigator

and the Officer of the Deck.

This one's built to break
into three dull pieces.

We lead a slightly different
life out there

and it costs a little
more money.

I can't believe you broke
a $400 ashtray.

Yeah, I wish I hadn't done that.

It's... 'cause you're blonde.

How'd it go in the Sit Room?

Not my finest hour.

You want to go to the party?

I still got the watch.

Okay.

Can you glue that thing
back together?

No.

They'll page me up
at the party, right?

Yeah.

( tosses item on shelf )

Okay.

( soft music plays )

As you can see, we've moved on
to the caviar course.

I love caviar.

I know
how you do.

Stoli Cristall, the most
elegant of vodkas.

( clinking )

The caviar itself

is a product
of my advice

at the convention

on International Trade
in Endangered Species.

We passed a much more stringent
bill against the poaching

of Caspian Sea
sturgeons.

This is Oklahoma caviar?

California white sturgeon

from the Stillman Sea Farm
in Elverta.

Only the best.

Stop, it's getting hot in here.

Oh, I think
you're going to find...

( knocking )

Excuse me.

Good evening,
Mr. President.

How you doing?

I'm fine,
thank you, sir.

I'm sorry, but Leo
needs to see you.

Okay. Anyone else?

Yes, sir.
Then Toby.

Yeah.

You're young, Charlie.

Don't you want to be
having fun right now?

Yes, sir,
but I work for you.

I get that a lot. Leo.

Good evening, sir.

Yes?

You look sharp.
Thank you.

Hey, Abbey.

Hi, Leo.

What happened?

It sounds like Commando
Especial units under Luna

broke into the refinery
and took control.

The Americans?

They're safe.

It's over.

Yeah.

Well, we kind of knew
it was going to be like this.

Yes, sir.

Jordan
still here?
Yeah.

All right,
have a good night.

You know Toby's lurking
out here, right?

Yeah. Toby.

Thank you, Mr. President.

TOBY:
Good evening, sir.

Hi.

Good evening, Mrs. Bartlet.

That's a lovely housecoat
you're wearing.

Thank you.

Listen, I'm kind of in
the middle of something.

Is this anything that could
possibly wait until tomorrow?

Of course it is,
Mr. President. I'm sorry.

Really, I stopped by
'cause I hadn't told you

that Andy's pregnant.

It's twins and, of course,
I'm the father.

Well, that's great.

Well done. See you tomorrow.

Yeah.

Jed.

( grunts )

Toby!

Get in here.

I was this close.

Andy's pregnant?

Yeah. It's, uh, twins.

A boy and a, um

uh, a girl.

That is the most
wonderful news.

I'm going to cry.

You should marry
that girl, Toby.

I'm doing
my best, sir.

How far along
is she?

End of May.

I have a picture.
Wait a second.

End of May?
Oh, boy.

This is
going to... oh...

Hang on, I'm doing
math in my head.

Yeah, end of May?

Why didn't you tell us
until now?

Jed, he doesn't need a reason.

Yeah, but he's got one.

The truth is, I don't, sir.

At least not a good one.

I was intimidated
by your Catholicism.

Really?

Yeah.

It's my Catholicism, Toby.

It works for me.

And me.
And her.

Did you break
any laws?

No, sir.

Then a blessing
on your house, young man.

Mazel Tov.

Thank you, sir.

Thank you, ma'am.

Okay.

Is that caviar there?

Not really, no.

Let's go.

WHITAKER:
I told Leo McGarry that.

I said education
is the silver bullet.

That's what
this election's about.

We went in the field,
we came up with

the middle class tax cut
that made sense

plus the 100% tax
deductible tuition...

Excuse me.

Chris Whitaker, right?

Yeah, yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you, thank you,
thank you.

Well, thank you.

No, please.

We're all impressed with
how influential you were

particularly
when you consider

that most of us
have never met you.

( laughing )

But what I'm
most grateful for

is the process story

which takes attention
from the debate

and focuses it
where it belongs

which is the contest.

This is the story everyone
will be clamoring for

and I like that you're
filling that need.

And to show my gratitude

I'm calling all the major
news outlets

and letting them know
that I'll be forwarding

all your confidential
memos to the President

logs of all
your calls with him

Secret Service logs of your
meetings inside the White House.

I really
pissed you off, huh?

Don't disrespect Leo McGarry
and Bruno Gianelli.

Sam.

I was just on my way.

What do you guys need?

We need to talk to you.

Talk to me
about what?

We think you should run.

Why? Why would you think
something like that?

Well, it was Josh's idea.

Actually

it was Amy's.

Why?

Well, I picked a trifecta
with the California 47th

the sheriff's race

in Arizona and
the Tulsa Family Court.

Well, can I

just give you
the money and not...

I also think you'd be
a home run choice.

You're going to raise
a lot of money.

I'm going to help you
and I have a hunch the President

who just won a landslide

will be making
some visits as well.

You'll be the best funded
Democrat ever to run in 47.

You're not going to win,
so you can't lose.

I think you'd energize
the state party.

We're not going to let you
look like a fool.

We won't allow it.

What do you think?

I don't think
you should do it.

Energizing the state
party's good.

A well-funded airing
of the issues is good.

So is mollifying
House Democrats

but you have
to ask yourself,
is it worth it?

You're going to lose.

A Democrat's always
going to lose in the 47th.

Can't just pick up
and try someplace else.

They have a name for that.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I worked in a State Assembly
race in Manhattan

in a district where
Democrats

outnumbered Republicans
16 to one.

But everywhere we went

there'd be one lone poster
of a right-wing nutbar

who wanted to eliminate
the income tax.

And he was
holding up signs

and canvassing
everywhere

and bugging
the local reporters

until we had
to comment on it.

So I introduced myself
to his campaign manager

and I said,
"What are you doing?

"Your candidate doesn't
have a chance

and neither do your issues."

He said, "This
is what I believe.

"And no candidate

"gets to run in my district

without speaking to my issues."

I came this close
to voting for him.

So...

I don't know
about what you just said.

Then I think you should win.

( knocking )

I'm sorry.

I finally got
Mrs. Wilde on the phone.

All right.

"All right," what?

All right.

And get me Will Bailey
on the phone, too.

You think he's
still up?

Oh, yeah.
No problem.

I'm going to take
this call.

We'll go with you.

Boy, you're
in the Air Force

the private sector,
the Labor Department

two presidential
campaigns

and rehab and you think
you've seen it all

but it turns out you haven't

'cause Sam Seaborn
is going to be

the Democratic Candidate
for Congress

in Orange County.

I know.
I think it's terrific.

But I would've thought
you'd be unhappy.

Why?

He's going
to get crushed

and I wouldn't think

it would reflect well
on your boss.

Well, let me tell you something
about process, Dr. Kendall

and I'll do so while
tuning this radio to WNKW

"The Music of Your Life..."

( soft music plays )

...and begging the sun
for one more

moment of moonlight.

Speaking of the moon.

Luna took power tonight.

About three dozen people
are dead

and Ignacio's under arrest.

He'll be dead soon.

Well...

Luna's who you wanted.

The process matters
more than the outcome

and that's what we wanted.

And therein endeth the lesson.

Will you dance with me?

Yes.