Original subtitles

Previously on The West Wing:

It's over.

You'll be back.

Let's go-- ten bucks. Ten bucks for you...

JOSH: It was the President's idea.

He bet us you couldn't stay quiet

if he gave a bad answer.

Horton Wilde in Orange County

is in the hospital with his fourth heart attack.

Who knows when he's going to resume a campaign schedule.

He's dead.

The President wins the debate

tomorrow night, and you marry me again.

Will Bailey. You want to come inside?

The campaign's embarrassing to us.

And I'm not embarrassed by it.

If you can't find a Democrat

tell Kay that I'll do it.

Andy's pregnant, with twins.

( sighs )

Man...

Thank you.

You're Josh Lyman, aren't you?

Yeah.

Yeah. I've seen your picture a lot.

Can I ask you something?

Sure.

Bartlet's on the ballot for the Democratic Party

and for the Statehood Party.

It's okay that I voted for him in both columns, right?

No, you can't vote for him in two columns.

I already did.

Your ballot's going to be invalidated.

What the hell for?

You're only allowed to vote once.

He's on the ballot twice.

He's on the ballot more than that.

He's on the ballot as the Liberal Party nominee...

I'm saying I'm for Statehood.

Me, too, and yours is a vote we didn't get.

I'm so sorry to interrupt.

Did I hear you say

that you're supposed to vote for the President

in both columns?

No.

No, uh, you can vote for the President

in whatever column you want, but you can only vote once.

He's right.

Yes, I'm... Yes.

And I'll tell you a secret for a shortcut:

If you just, say, vote for one Democrat

and leave all the rest of the boxes blank

then you voted for all the Democrats.

Yes. No.

It doesn't...

You can't vote for a party.

You have to vote for a person.

No, I think you're wrong.

I'm not.

I left all but one box blank.

Well, then, you voted for none but one candidate.

Nuts.

Did you vote for the President?

Was the President the one box?

Ah, who remembers?

It was a minute and a half ago.

Don't be rude.

I'm sorry.

Thank you for voting.

Excuse me.

Yes, what?

Yes?

Yes, hello.

You're who I think you are, right?

I can be anybody you want.

( chuckles ): That's funny.

Thank you.

Um, I saw you getting run over by those people.

Just part of the job, ma'am.

Mmm. I guess you hear some pretty silly questions.

Well, I'm just worried

'cause they all tried to vote for Bartlet

and if this keeps up, we're headed toward

the biggest electoral upset in history

and nobody's going to be able to figure out why.

Right, well, it's the same thing with my parents.

I tell them to just rank the candidates in order of preference.

Right. No!

I voted for your boy in all three boxes.

No. Listen to me.

Your ballot is invalid.

So is yours.

Punch the box next to the candidate you prefer

once-- nothing else.

I'm sorry, one more thing.

I have a message from Toby Ziegler.

What?

I have a message from Toby Ziegler.

You know Toby?

He says... ten dollars.

I see.

You guys are a little troupe.

A little acting troupe with a "U."

Yes, sir, we are.

Can I give you a card?

No.

Mr. Ziegler said you were

a little edgy on election days

so, just to show there are no hard feelings

how about if I go down there and vote for the President right now?

As a matter of fact, that would be nice.

No problem.

Do you happen to know if I need to be...

I don't know, pre-registered or something?

Yes!

We've got 500 red and blue Bartlet-Hoynes banners.

That, plus 600 from Building Trades.

SAM: No.

I'm sorry?

No.

Why?

The partisanship's over.

We elected a President.

This is for everybody.

No banners tonight; the American flag.

Okay, but we're using the Seal

and I'll put Senate and House leadership up there.

No balloons, no confetti.

Why?

It's not a party.

It is a party. Yeah, but we won.

We don't have to pander.

Please don't say that.

On your birthday, don't we pander to you?

Not as much as I'd like.

I'm not kidding.

What are you babbling about?

We haven't won anything yet. The speech is done.

Two speeches are done.

What's the second?

I've got a speech if he wins

and one if he doesn't.

You wrote a concession?

Of course I wrote a concession.

You want to tempt the wrath of the whatever

from high atop the thing?

No.

Then go outside, turn around three times and spit.

What the hell's the matter with you?

( chuckling ): It's like 25 degrees outside.

Go. Hello.

( with foreign accent ): Oh, Mr. Lyman.

I see your picture in the magazine.

Tell me

if I swallow my ballot, does it still...?

A little election day humor-- that's great.

He wrote a concession speech.

Of course he wrote a concession speech. Why wouldn't he?

What possible reason

would he have for not writing a concession speech?

The wrath from high atop the thing.

He upped and said we were gonna...

JOSH: No, you got to go outside

turn around three times and curse.

Spit.

Spit and curse.

Do everything. Go.

Go! Go! Go! Go!

Go!

These things have a half-life.

You can't just...

All right, we're meeting again when?

First round of exits at 11:00.

11:00, unless there's a reason earlier.

Can I have you two seconds?

Yeah. What do you need?

Hang on.

There's trouble?

A little bit.

For the President?

For you.

Listen, I know better

than to stick my face in your personal life

except, you know, for sport.

What happened?

Roll Call's got it from the Office

of Congress's Attending Physician

that Andy's pregnant.

When did they start doing more than flu vaccinations?

They need updated medical records.

Roll Call doesn't need

updated medical records, do they?

They're going to connect the dots.

It's going to be bad for her and bad for you.

You mean bad for us.

I can handle the "us."

What's her plan?

I don't know. Toby...

I don't know. We haven't talked about it.

She's got to be proactive.

Yeah.

It would be nice

if we could announce a wedding.

I'm working on that, thanks.

You'll talk to her, hmm?

Yeah. Thanks.

Did you...?

Yes, I turned, I cursed, I spat, it froze.

C.J.: You can't be too careful.

I think you can.

Sam, you got Will Bailey calling from California.

* Won't you come home, Will Bailey...? *

* Won't you come home...? *

Sancho, how you doing?

I'm Sancho?

Yeah.

Okay.

Can I ask you something?

Yes, Grasshopper.

How much do you know about exit polls?

What's there to know?

You stand 100 yards away and say "Who'd you vote for?"

You can't afford exit polls.

Yeah, I've got volunteers out there with clipboards.

And? Something weird's going on.

What? We're winning.

What do you mean?

We're down one in Spyglass Hill

even in Emerald Bay

and up three in El Toro Station.

Okay, can I give you a nickel's worth of free advice?

Yeah.

It's not advice so much as I'm saying this:

Democrats vote early, okay?

And diehards vote early.

Okay, you want me to call in every couple of hours?

Every hour.

Okay.

Bonnie, Democrats vote early, right?

Yeah.

Ginger, Democrats and diehards vote early, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

( applause )

Mrs. Bartlet

can you tell us who you voted for.

Nobody. I was just fixing my makeup.

How are you spending the rest of the day?

Filling out Chicago ballots; just pitching in.

He's going to be flying around thanking supporters.

Is there any suspense at all today?

Well, there are

about 14 competitive Senate races

about 46 House races

and right here in New Hampshire

there's a $600 million bond issue

plus, no one's

elected my husband President yet.

( applause )

( clearing throat )

Mr. President

polls show a dogfight here in New Hampshire.

How would you feel if you won the election

but lost your home state?

Better than if I won my home state

but lost my home country.

The only poll that matters closes in 17 hours.

Did you vote for the bond issue?

Title 63, Chapter 659, Section 43

of New Hampshire Election Code says

electioneering is prohibited within a corridor ten feet wide

and extending a distance

from the entrance door of the building

as determined by the moderator

where the election is being held.

If anyone knows what that means...

Yeah, I voted for the bond issue.

It's going to improve public education

without a tax abatement.

REPORTER: Mr. President!

( reporters calling out )

Mr. President, do you have anything to say to Governor Ritchie today?

Well, one way or another

I imagine we'll be talking tonight.

I got to get back.

You can hockle Abbey for awhile.

She's taking the next plane.

Thank you, Mr. President.

( reporters thanking President)

These are for your signature.

Yeah. Listen, do you think

you could score me a couple of aspirin?

Yes, sir. You got a headache?

I'm fine.

Should I ask the doctor...?

No, it's just a headache.

Just me and you today, okay? I'm fine.

Yes, sir.

I'll sign these in the car.

Yes, sir.

( sighing )

Come on.

Okay, this can wait.

Let's go.

( televisions muted )

( Josh sighing )

JOSH: Nothing's happening right now.

By the end of the night, 100 million votes will be cast.

Polls have been open in the East for six and a half hours.

You know how many votes have been cast?

One percent.

( sighs ): Everybody votes after work.

Not me, I vote first thing.

The VNS exit polls

are down in Michigan for a little while.

And it's raining in Oregon.

This is like the ionization blackout period.

Pumpkin Patch, is there anything I can do

to get you to go to the movies for eight hours?

Senior Staff.

Yeah.

But can you do me a favor?

What do you need?

This is a photocopy of my absentee ballot.

I was hoping the President could sign it

and I'd have it framed.

( chuckles ): Yeah.

You know, the President's

the first winner I've voted for.

Is this a joke?

It's not hard to believe that...

No, I mean this.

What are you talking about?

Toby already did the thing this morning

with the invalid ballots.

My ballot's invalid?

This isn't a joke?

It's invalid?

You voted for Ritchie.

Where? Here.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, your "picking the winner" streak is probably over.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

It's, it's an optical scan ballot.

I drew a line through the Democratic ticket.

Almost. That's almost what you did.

What you did was draw a line through the Republican ticket.

You didn't ticket split

you voted for every Republican in Wisconsin.

I would check, you may have voted for McCarthy.

Okay, I'm going to rectify this. How?

I don't know, but my vote's going to be counted.

It will be counted. I don't want it counted.

You still want me to have him... Give me that.

Hey, I'm going in, okay?

Hey, Josh. No.

I'm sorry?

It's the Senior Staff meeting.

I'm Senior Staff.

You don't have your briefing memo.

How do you know I don't have it?

I'm sorry, do you have it?

No.

I memorized it.

Did you happen to get my e-mail

on the three new rules for the week?

I got it. I read it. It was good stuff.

It's possible the salient details escape me.

Rule Number Two-- you don't attend daily Senior Staff

without the briefing memo.

The agenda's outlined

and there are up-to-the-minute details

on priority items and still

half the meeting is spent regurgitating the memo

for those staff members who have difficulty

holding on to salient details.

That's a fair point

and next time I'm going to remember the memo.

I'm confident you will

'cause you're going to remember it this time, too.

You want me to go back to my office and get it?

I do.

Okay.

All right.

I'm going to humor the new girl.

Appreciate it.

Going to get your briefing memo?

Yes.

Charlie

security just called for you.

They'd like to see you out front.

Security?

Yeah.

What the hell?

Anthony.

Michelle, he's with me.

Which one?

The regular-sized one. Who are you?

Orlando Kettles, boss. How you doing?

Fine, thanks.

Anthony.

Yeah, yeah, you know, I brought him today.

Yeah. First of all, they're a little prickly

about security around here.

You're not down as Anthony-plus-one.

You see the guns standing around now?

Boy's going to Columbus.

Starting right tackle for the Buckeyes-- true freshman.

I hand you the ball, you can run behind him, have a cup of coffee.

He's going to play on Sundays.

What are you, his agent?

We don't have nothing in writing.

What is he doing here, Anthony? Yeah.

He got pulled over with an open can of Pabst in his hand.

He was dri...

You were driving drunk?

No way, boss.

He passed the breathalyzer.

It was the open can of Pabst.

Saturday's St. Erasmus Academy

that's a big game for a senior.

You want to put a hurt on some blue blazers...

Anthony.

Coach is going to sit him down

because of the Pabst Blue Ribbon unless...

Unless what?

You know, you do your thing. My thing?

Write him a note.

Saying what?

He's a good guy, Charlie.

He does his business.

I'm not Officer Krupke. I have a job.

Hey, could you try to think back to the days

before you were Secretary of State or something?

There are good guys and there are bad guys

and when good guys stop letting you play with them

the bad guys have a recruiting field day.

When did you start talking like Mickey Spillane?

I don't know. Who's Officer Cupcake?

Okay, you're seeing a musical.

Man, look at the size of him, Charlie.

And he's not done growing yet, either.

Who do you want him playing for?

What else has he got?

What else? Priors.

Nothing, man. I swear.

He stole a goat.

A goat? Yeah.

Why did he...? No. I don't care.

You got a Social Security number?

Yeah.

Orlando, you got practice this afternoon?

Oh, yeah. You're not going.

It's Election Day.

You're going to spend it with me.

Yo, man, I done wind sprints

I'll take the swap.

Follow me.

This is the White House.

Frederick Douglass came here.

Mondays through Fridays, we wear coats and ties.

That goes for you, too, Mugsy.

Hey, Charlie, not for nothing

but just so you know

some of your higher end places provide a jacket for you.

Right, and again you're confusing the White House

with the Friar's Club.

Now these people I work with are serious people

so don't embarrass me in front of them.

You got it, boss.

All right, we're going to have to wait until...

Whoa, sorry, man. That wasn't cool.

How you doing?

You all right?

Uh...

He should, uh... ( clears throat )

You should play football.

Hey, man, I'm trying, you know?

But I had an open Pabst

and that's the way that goes.

Yeah.

Let's go.

JOSH: Rule Number Two-- daily Senior Staff

will... something the briefing memo.

I have the briefing memo, I'm going in.

Yeah, no. No?

No, 'cause have you read Rule Number One?

The salient details...

The meeting starts on time

and if you're not there when it starts, you don't go in.

That's insanity.

Well, I'm quite mad.

There has to be a natural fluidity to these things.

It's how we work best.

You can't say that every meeting has to...

I didn't.

The e-mail, which is exactly

this long, by the way--

in case as a boy you had some sort of frightening experience

with Balzac and that's why you didn't read it--

says, at the top, "This applies only

to the daily Senior Staff meeting."

One meeting it's going to be important to be on time.

Well, I think that's a random cracking of the whip.

According to the last 300 daily diaries

the President is typically 70 to 90 minutes

over-scheduled by the end of the day.

The median time a day ends

the over-under is 10:20 p.m.

As many days have ended after that time

as have ended before it.

The result being the Commander in Chief

of the U.S. Armed Forces

hasn't had a night's sleep in four years.

That's both bad and easy to fix.

Okay.

Well, yes, that's hard to argue against

and I'll remember this talk next time.

I have all the confidence in the world that you will.

Okay, well, I'm going in now, all right?

Sweet of you to tell me a joke, Josh.

You're the funny one, I can tell.

All right.

This is your little part of the store and I respect that.

See what I did there?

Respect.

No one's bigger than the game.

You're an example for the kids.

Yeah.

DONNA: I'm going out for about 20 minutes.

Where you going? I'm going to find someone who will swap votes.

I'm sorry? I'm going to find a Ritchie supporter

who'll vote for the President to offset my absentee ballot.

Really? It's Election Day.

I'm doing this.

And you think it's going to take about 20 minutes?

Yeah, I'll be right back. You bet.

Toby... He can't talk.

Okay.

We're late for the first sonogram.

Ooh, big needle. 18 inches.

Right in the stomach, Toby. Don't look directly at it.

Yeah, that's amniocentesis.

Hurts like heartbreak.

You've had the procedure?

Not me personally.

Toby, when you get there

it's a good idea to slip the nurse something.

Tell her you're hoping for a smooth second trimester.

You grease the nurse?

He's kidding.

Give me one second, would you?

I'll catch right up.

Hey, sports fans, this is getting exciting.

Yes.

So what do you think, like, 50 bucks?

I don't know. It's your first, it's twins...

I don't know. I think I'd give her $100.

Yeah, okay.

In your life

you have never been on time to this meeting.

Yeah, I wasn't, actually.

I was just incredibly late to the meeting right before it.

Well, that's the trick, then. Yeah.

Sam, you've got Will Bailey on the phone again

if you want him.

That name sounds familiar.

He's a guy in California.

He's on the phone

and I'm going to talk to him now.

Yeah? Yeah.

Everything all right?

Yeah.

California 47th.

He was the guy running Horton Wilde.

Yeah. Yeah, they're going to lose that by 20 points.

Really? Yeah.

You're getting that from the exits?

Yeah. Great.

Great?

No, I mean, it's

a tough beat, what with dying and all.

Yeah.

I'm going to talk to him now, okay?

Okay.

Hey.

I think we're still up.

Josh says the exits have you down 20.

No, he means the tracking.

The last one was a week ago and then the DNC left town.

He said the exits.

Hey, when I said "exits" before, I meant "tracking."

And I'm pretty sure they did the last one

about a week ago and then left town.

Yeah, yeah, they may have

called that putt a little early.

Anyway, Sam, it would be helpful

if we could get added to the President's afternoon satellite.

We could really use some radio at drive time.

Yeah, but listen, Will, no kidding

drive time's also when the plants get out

and the real Orange County votes

and that's when you turn into a pumpkin.

I'm just saying, don't get your hopes up.

No, just a good showing. Cover the spread.

All right.

What'd he say? Don't get your hopes up.

Are they? No.

Everybody on the street!

But we're going to make history.

( Andy whistling quietly )

Roll Call has the pregnancy.

What?

Roll Call has the pregnancy.

C.J. just told me. When?

A little while ago.

( sighs )

Why are you telling me now?

I didn't want to ruin the day for you.

Well, okay, but then why are you telling me now?

I couldn't help it.

Roll Call has it from where?

BOTH: The Office of the Congressional...

Thanks.

What are you saying that to me for?

I was... saying it to them.

I was asking it...

Just out of curiosity

how long did you think this was going to be covert?

These are twins, Andy.

You think you're going to go on Meet the Press

and Russert's not going to notice you're the size of a school?

Why not just come out and say

"I'm expecting twins.

"I couldn't be happier.

"The father's my ex-husband, Toby Ziegler

"to whom I'll be remarried on a date to be decided upon.

I'm thinking Christmas."

I'm not marrying you again.

Then say the first part at least.

I hadn't announced it because you don't in the first 12 weeks

because... that's when most of the things go wrong.

These bodies of yours, I don't know how you live with them.

You don't seem to mind.

I like the outsides.

Hello, Andrea. Toby.

Hi.

Honey, if you're going to get grossed-out

and faint, you should sit.

She's kidding.

How have you been feeling?

I feel great. Mm-hmm.

You feel like you're getting enough calcium?

I don't know. What does that feel like?

I don't know either.

It's just something we ask.

We don't even care about the answer.

You should draft a release.

In fact, let that be my first act of fatherhood--

drafting your release.

Go back to my roots

as we all must go.

And now you're on offense and not defense.

I'm not going to be on offense or defense.

The things we do in our lives, many of them are not voluntary.

You don't say.

I think you performed

your first act of fatherhood already.

Yes, indeed.

So let my second act be throwing you a little press conference.

That sounds fine.

I, myself, can't make it, but you have a nice time, honey.

Do I need to tell you the first rule of damage control?

No, but the next time

you refer to this pregnancy as damage...

Get the information out early

get it out yourself, do it on your own terms.

That's three rules.

Andy, look, I'm not kidding.

You've got...

( rhythmic beating )

TOBY: What was that?

It was...

Did you hear that? Yeah, that was...

Shh.

( rhythmic beating continues)

Andy, you-you can see their...

Uh-huh.

heads.

I can see heads.

( laughing )

DONNA: Let me make this argument to you.

My vote in Wisconsin is more valuable

than your vote in the District.

You're getting big value.

How do you figure?

The President's going to win the District

it's a forgone conclusion.

But Wisconsin's actually in play and I voted for your guy.

How do I know that?

I've shown you the ballot-- look.

Well, that's a photocopy.

Of course it's a photocopy.

The real one's in Wisconsin.

Well, how do I know that?

You don't.

This is an honor thing.

It's about honor and democracy.

Well, I'm going to go vote now

so please stop talking to me.

Fine.

You think I'm going to scam you?

I've been out here two and a half hours

trying to get one vote.

You think this is how I make money?

( sighs )

Hey, you know what?

No problem shouting in public, but I think...

Take off the Bartlet button? Yeah.

Josh told me you were still out here.

I was over at the place. Thanks.

You want to get a muffin?

Yeah, I'll walk you.

So, what's going on?

It's raining in Oregon.

Yeah, yeah, Josh was talking about that before.

Apparently, all his other problems are solved.

If your guy's going to win big

you don't want it to rain.

There's less motivation anyway

'cause of the blowout and...

you have no idea how fast

these things can become a race.

What do you need?

A banana muffin, please?

I did something last week.

I went to see a guy named Will Bailey.

He ran Horton Wilde's campaign in Orange County

and Wilde died a couple of weeks ago

and his widow wanted to know

what Democrat was going to stand in

for her husband should he win

and I said...

You're kidding.

You have to understand.

This wasn't something that cost me anything.

They weren't going to announce unless Wilde won

and that was never going to happen in Orange County.

It's like the Secretary of Agriculture saying

"Sure, I'm ready to assume the Presidency

should the 18 who come before me die. Why not?"

So, why not?

Because it's a two-point race right now.

This is very exciting.

No. It's not.

The prospect of going back on my word

to a recent widow...

So why go back on it?

Because the alternative is taking 90 days off

to go home, lose by 20 points

to a Republican committee chair I hate

and never be able to run for public office for real

which is something I maybe wouldn't mind doing one day.

Once 5:00 and 6:00 roll around...

That's exactly what I'm thinking.

Except...

What?

There's an El Niño thing going on

in Southern California today and...

No.

it's supposed to start raining in a few hours.

Okay.

Okay, I'm going to go back to the office.

Okay.

Why don't you give me the button.

Yeah.

( sighs )

You're cleared.

You can come upstairs.

There are chairs up there that are over 200 years old.

Before you sit in one, I want to see written confirmation

from the Army Corps of Engineers that it can support your girth.

You stole a goat?

I'm assuming this was a mascot?

Yeah, that was sweet.

I was just the leg man.

You know, Anthony's the brains.

Yeah, it had that international jewel thief feel to it.

Hey, so what do you think we're doing

for the rest of the day?

CHARLIE: Video games, hanging out.

Really?

I'm voting at 8:30, you guys will come with me

watch me vote, and then go home.

Oh, man, what good is...?

I mean, they're not going to let me vote.

It's like my face is pressed up against the window.

That's right. And yet somehow, I don't care.

I'm old enough to vote.

You're 18?

I'm 19.

They came to the school to sign up people.

You're registered to vote?

I think I might be, yeah.

Where?

He doesn't know where.

I don't know where.

Well, let's find out.

Good afternoon, Mr. President.

Good afternoon, sir.

Hello. Hi.

What's going on?

Uh, line one now is a DSS line.

It means Direct Station Select.

Pick it up, you get me.

What was wrong with the old way?

You done?

Yes, ma'am.

Thanks a lot.

I'm sorry, sir.

What was wrong with the old way?

Oh, this is better.

How?

You don't care, sir. It just is.

I hear you've got rules for meetings.

Yes, some.

Yes, I do, sir.

You don't think that's apt to create

a resentment among the people

who were here before with...?

It's not like the thing wasn't working with...

Whatever you may assume

that wasn't a rube sitting out there, Debbie.

She ran the Oval Office

for two years and a state house before that.

Yes, sir.

At any rate, line one gets you me.

What if, instead of you, I want a dial tone?

Well, that's line two, but you're not going to want one.

Why? I'm going to place your outgoing calls.

You're going to place a lot of my outgoing calls...

No, sir, I need to place them all.

I can make my own phone call. Don't be...

Sir... I can make my own phone call.

Yes, but soon you might not necessarily

remember that you did.

When I place the call, there's a record

and that's how you'll know

and then you won't be worried about it.

That's good.

That's a good idea.

Is there anything else?

No.

Thank you, Mr. President.

You and I haven't met.

In my life, I never would've thought she was a rube.

I'm sorry about that.

Debbie...

I have to ask you.

Are we talking about...?

Did you bring it up

'cause you... notice...?

Is there some particular thing today you noticed?

No, sir. Do you feel all right?

Should I call...?

No, please.

I was talking about something else.

Line one is you.

Yes, sir.

Thanks.

Will, you have Sheryl Cryman.

That's the county clerk's legal counsel. It's blinking.

Sheryl, it's Will Bailey.

How you doing?

Fine, thank you.

There are scattered power outages

in the Casa Verde precinct in Santa Ana

and the street lights are going on and off

in the only legitimately Democratic precinct I've got

so if I lose by a hundred

'cause people couldn't cross the street

who in your office would I talk to about election tampering?

Thanks a lot, Sheryl.

I appreciate it.

Pull the sound trucks from Laguna Hills.

There isn't enough foot traffic.

Will. Put 'em in Anaheim.

Will. When the hell's it going to rain?!

Willy!

Don't call me that.

The die has been cast, big brother.

You're making everyone crazy.

There's a moment after you cast the die

but before it hits the table.

Breathe wrong and you'll change the way it lands.

Can I get a new weather report?!

There's value here. There's value.

You've got to appreciate the value.

A Ritchie vote in Wisconsin.

Well, let me ask you this.

Bartlet's supposed to be smart, right?

He's the smart one, we're the dumb ones.

He knows best.

So what does it say to you

when his people don't know how to fill out a ballot?

Maybe he's a little out of touch.

Is that what it says?

Or maybe it says that even

with the President's supporters accidentally

voting for the wrong candidate

you're still going to get creamed, you little fascist!

This is an honor thing!

Excuse me.

Yes. Hi.

Did somebody steal your purse?

Me? No.

Okay.

I'm on a mission and I said

I'd be 20 minutes and it's been six hours

and it's starting

to get kind of cold.

Okay. You were shouting at no one.

Little guy. Bow tie.

Long as you're okay.

Wait. Hang on.

Do you mind if I ask you who you're voting for?

I guess I kind of do, yeah.

That's fair, that's perfectly fair.

So let me ask you this instead.

Are you voting for Ritchie or the President?

I'm going to go inside now, okay?

Lieutenant, I'm not a crazy person

and I'm not asking you

for the bomb sequence on the USS Essex.

Now, be a man and tell me who you're voting for.

Ritchie, and you demoted me a rank.

I'm so sorry.

I'm seeing your shoulders now.

Lieutenant Commander.

Reese.

Reese is a nice name.

Reese what?

Lieutenant Commander Reese-- Jack Reese.

Can I talk to you about something?

You know, this is the first election

in my life I haven't had to vote by absentee ballot

and I was really looking forward

to pulling that lever.

Absentee ballot. I know how you feel.

I'm from Wisconsin.

It's my home, but here I am in Washington on Election Day.

I've usually been on a Los Angeles Class submarine

in the South China Sea.

Don't try to trump me here. It's not a battle.

We're in this together.

No, we're not.

I voted absentee in Wisconsin

and I voted for Ritchie

and I meant to vote for the President.

Now, I think you should go in there

and vote the other way to make it a wash.

Yeah, okay.

Look...

Really?

Yeah, sounds about right.

I'm Donna.

Jack.

Commander...

Jack's fine.

So... why aren't you on a sub right now?

I haven't been for a little while.

What's your billet?

Well, it used to be Regional Director for the Office

of the Joint Chiefs for Southeast Asia

but I got transferred.

Where?

Nancy McNally's office.

She's the National Security Advisor.

You're working at the White House?

Yeah.

Listen, I got to go vote, okay?

Yeah, sure.

Oh, listen, I've got a photocopy

of my absentee ballot

if you want to verify that I really...

No, no. It's an honor thing, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

See, now there are late exits showing even

with white male suburbans in New York

and Chicago and Philadelphia.

There's huge labor turnout.

We're only losing Florida by seven-- Seven!

Toby, I think this is going to be bigger than we thought.

I stare at this and I stare at this

and I don't know which is the boy and which is the girl.

I suppose that problem will take care of itself.

You know, if you stare at them for a while

well, it's pretty gross, but still...

Okay, I'm concerned

that you've turned completely

into another person.

Hey! I see one victory balloon

before this thing is called and...!

Yeah, you better run!

Huh?

Nothing.

CHARLIE: You read the stuff?

ORLANDO: Yeah.

It wasn't long.

Yeah.

And I was impartial, right?

I gave you the best of each and the worst of each.

Hey, Mr. Young-- I'm not being

disrespectful or nothing

but I'm just trying to concentrate.

Listen, this is easy.

You can do it, no problem, but if you need to

you can ask for help. You're allowed.

Okay.

Hey, listen-- Why does a guy who's heading off

to the Big Ten care about playing

St. Erasmus Academy on Saturday?

You're going to be playing Michigan and Penn State.

I don't know.

It's what I do on Saturdays.

Hey, you know what?

I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the box or nothing

but try rushing the quarterback.

Know what I'm saying?

You're not going to get there.

You're not going to touch him.

You're up.

He's a good guy, you know.

He does his business.

He just doesn't like looking like a fool.

How long did you hang on to the goat?

Three days.

Three days?

Yeah.

What did you feed him?

Cheetos.

Okay.

Hey.

Hey, Anthony.

I voted.

All right.

I'm going again.

No, no, no, no.

ELSIE: Will!

Come on.

Come inside and have something to eat with us!

Will.

( thunderclap )

Jesus!

Wow!

What else can you do?

I didn't know I could do that.

It's on. You can see it.

Hey. I'm not spitting

I'm not turning around.

Union households are beating nonunion

in some of these districts.

C.J.? Yeah.

Can you pick up three?

This is C.J.

Thanks.

What was that?

You'll see in a minute.

9:00!

( cheering )

Good evening, Mr. President.

I feel like I should be self-deprecating.

I mean, it's not inauguration.

I could be funny, right?

I don't think so.

I think it's the wrong note.

If I'm thanking campaign staff, maybe.

What are you doing?

We've got some news.

What?

What?

You're going to win New Hampshire.

TV REPORTER: With seven percent of the precincts reporting

CBS is ready to declare Delaware

with its three electoral votes...

REPORTER 2: ...closing only an hour ago, NBC is putting Maryland

in the President's column.

REPORTER 3: ...no surprises there.

REPORTER 4: And with 22% of the vote tallied in Maine...

REPORTER 5: Polls are closed in West Virginia.

REPORTER 6: ...with the polls closing in Massachusetts and Pennsylvania.

( crowd cheering )

( cheering continues )

Halfway around the world

in Bosnia and Chechnya and Rwanda

they dream of the promise we fulfilled today

of a future we choose, for ourselves, together.

Sam? What's going on?

They're not calling it.

...and with eight percent of the precincts reporting

remains too close to call.

My goodness, if you lived to be a hundred

did you think you'd ever see anything like this?

I did not.

Four years ago, we were joined

by our highest ideals, by our best hopes

and tonight we're joined by that same commitment

to open new doors of opportunity

and justice.

( cheering )

To ensure that the promise of this country

is the birthright of all the people.

( cheering )

We've achieved so much together

always believing, always knowing

that America could be made new again

and so it was, and so it will be again.

God bless you all.

God bless the United States of America.

( "The Times They Are ( A-Changing" playing )

* Come gather round people, wherever you roam *

* And admit that the waters around you have grown *

* And accept it that soon you'll be drenched to the bone... *

We're going skip the parties for a while

and head back to the office.

There are nine House races too close to call.

Tell him about California.

In the California 47th...

In the 47th-- you don't tell it well.

In the 47th, Horton Wilde

who's dead, is losing by 88 votes.

It was a perfect storm.

It was.

Low Republican turnout, 'cause the President won the Midwest.

Low supporter turnout 'cause Webb didn't have an opponent

and the DNC gave up on it a week ago

so the RNC left town and they never saw the exits

your guy Will Bailey was seeing.

Plus there was an actual storm.

I tell it fine.

Anyway, we're going to be up all night with these.

It's going to be fun.

We should go.

* And the times, they are a-changin' *

* Come senators, congressmen, please heed the call *

* Don't you stand in the doorway *

* Don't you block up the hall *

* For he who gets hurt will be he who has stalled *

* There's a battle outside ragin' *

* It will soon shake your windows... *

That was wonderful.

That was fun.

How you feeling?

I feel great.

You want a glass of water?

No, I'm fine.

You seem a little dry.

Sure you don't want a glass of water?

Yeah.

Maybe I should get you a glass of water, just in case.

You can hold it in your hand.

How'd you know?

You were off the prompter.

Just for a minute at the end.

I couldn't see it.

It's all right.

There are going to be more days like this.

It starts now.

It's going to be harder this time.

Yeah, I know.

We can still have tonight, though, right?

* For the times they are a-changin'... *

You got lots of nights.

Smart people who love you

are going to have your back.

All right.

* The times, they are a-changin' *

Excuse me.

You want to take another curtain call?

Sure.

* For the times, they are a-changin'... *