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I met the most amazing man I'll
ever meet in my life when I was
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4 1/2 minutes old.
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Not that guy.
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That guy.
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My dad was blind.
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But no one treated him differently
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because he was blind.
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I find that very interesting, Mr. Boyd.
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Primarily because they didn't know.
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He didn't want to be looked at differently,
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so he used little tricks
to keep his secret.
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00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,472
Did you not say at your
previous deposition, and I quote,
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line 21,
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"thanks to Mr. Tyler's buyback,
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00:00:32,461 --> 00:00:35,113
the stock prices were artificially low"?
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00:00:35,147 --> 00:00:36,197
Well...
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- Yes, but...
- Your witness.
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00:00:38,417 --> 00:00:40,918
Well, some people knew, like my Uncle Glen.
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He and my dad had all sorts of maneuvers.
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00:00:43,005 --> 00:00:45,056
Like, Glen's book on
tape version of a menu.
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00:00:45,074 --> 00:00:46,724
Double cheeseburger. Hmm.
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00:00:46,759 --> 00:00:48,159
Too many calories for me.
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I'll just get the shrimp salad.
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00:00:50,129 --> 00:00:52,030
Well, I'm getting that double cheeseburger.
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People knew he couldn't see perfectly.
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They just didn't know
he couldn't see at all.
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00:00:55,734 --> 00:00:57,952
But when my parents
split and dad moved out,
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he made the decision to get Elvis
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00:00:59,621 --> 00:01:00,738
and come out to the world.
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And when Mel Fisher came out...
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- Forward.
- He came out hard.
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Now you might wonder why he had a guide dog
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and a cane.
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Car!
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Blind guy in a crosswalk, you idiot!
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Because you can't hit a
car with your guide dog.
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- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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When mom and dad got divorced,
Katie was unwillingly appointed
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mom's best friend/therapist/
everything else.
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00:01:47,686 --> 00:01:49,537
What you listening to?
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You probably wouldn't know 'em.
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00:01:51,890 --> 00:01:54,475
Hey, how mad are we at Madelyn
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for liking all of Amy's
boyfriend's status updates?
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You can drop me off here.
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00:02:00,282 --> 00:02:02,567
I see Caitlyn.
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Wait, not yet.
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00:02:04,953 --> 00:02:07,105
I feel like we haven't
had any K and J time.
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00:02:07,139 --> 00:02:08,939
You know what we should do?
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Behave like a normal mother and daughter?
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Have a hooky day.
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00:02:12,144 --> 00:02:14,662
I'll blow off my psych
class. We can go to the mall.
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Shop for sparkly flip-flops.
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00:02:17,065 --> 00:02:18,516
What do you say?
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It sounds nice.
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But I know since you're my parent,
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00:02:21,047 --> 00:02:22,013
what you really want from me
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is to stay in school and do well
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so that I can get into a good college...
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00:02:26,135 --> 00:02:28,570
Hopefully out of state.
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00:02:30,673 --> 00:02:33,642
Keep it gaga, girl.
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00:02:33,676 --> 00:02:35,277
That's not a thing.
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00:02:35,311 --> 00:02:37,178
And Tom Hawkins is in town Thursday.
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You and Glen are taking him to dinner.
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00:02:39,182 --> 00:02:41,099
Remember to get the
retainer check from him.
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00:02:41,134 --> 00:02:42,818
I wanted to talk to you about that.
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00:02:42,852 --> 00:02:46,004
Wow. Janice, your Glen
impression is spot-on.
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Glen impression.
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00:02:49,092 --> 00:02:51,759
So what do you plan on telling Tom Hawkins
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00:02:51,778 --> 00:02:53,194
about the old eye situation?
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00:02:53,212 --> 00:02:54,496
Well, the truth, you know?
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00:02:54,530 --> 00:02:55,914
I've got a couple of 'em
sitting here on my face.
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00:02:55,948 --> 00:02:57,699
They're blue. The ladies seem to love 'em.
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You know what I mean.
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00:02:58,801 --> 00:03:02,204
We haven't told our biggest
client that you are blind.
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00:03:02,238 --> 00:03:04,372
We've been lying to him
since the day we met.
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00:03:04,407 --> 00:03:05,824
We have never lied to Tom.
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00:03:05,858 --> 00:03:07,142
We may have led him
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00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,311
to form some incorrect conclusions.
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00:03:09,345 --> 00:03:11,780
Glenny-boy, you better take these.
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00:03:11,814 --> 00:03:14,566
I'm in no condition to drive. All right.
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00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:16,051
What, a blind guy can't get
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00:03:16,085 --> 00:03:18,586
the "don't drink and
drive" message out there?
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00:03:18,604 --> 00:03:19,888
You're crazy.
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00:03:19,906 --> 00:03:21,990
How is Cars scarier
than Paranormal Activity?
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00:03:22,024 --> 00:03:23,024
It's a kids' movie!
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That's what's so disturbing.
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00:03:24,393 --> 00:03:26,728
It's a world with just
cars. There's no people.
88
00:03:26,762 --> 00:03:28,146
Where are the people?
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00:03:28,197 --> 00:03:30,031
Who pumps the gas? Who built the roads?
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00:03:30,049 --> 00:03:31,833
It's this menacing secret.
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00:03:31,868 --> 00:03:33,668
The cars killed the people!
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00:03:33,703 --> 00:03:35,854
Hey.
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00:03:35,905 --> 00:03:36,855
Hey, Jenny.
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00:03:36,889 --> 00:03:39,858
Hi, we were just...
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00:03:39,892 --> 00:03:41,476
What's the deal with Cars, huh?
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00:03:41,511 --> 00:03:43,395
Why do they have seats?
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00:03:43,429 --> 00:03:46,314
If you sat in them, you'd
be inside their face.
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00:03:46,349 --> 00:03:48,350
Okay.
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00:03:50,019 --> 00:03:52,587
So when's the wedding?
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00:03:52,605 --> 00:03:55,073
Come on, man.
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00:03:55,107 --> 00:03:56,508
I'm telling him at dinner, Glen.
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00:03:56,542 --> 00:03:57,943
Just like I told all our other clients.
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00:03:57,977 --> 00:03:59,578
And we lost two of them.
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00:03:59,612 --> 00:04:02,564
I'm just saying, Tom
is 30% of our business.
105
00:04:02,598 --> 00:04:04,549
We've had a rough year.
106
00:04:04,584 --> 00:04:06,051
You with the divorce,
107
00:04:06,102 --> 00:04:08,787
me going cold throwing craps at Pechanga.
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00:04:08,821 --> 00:04:09,888
I'm telling him.
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00:04:09,922 --> 00:04:12,023
I'm here, I'm blind, get used to it.
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00:04:12,058 --> 00:04:13,441
Or...
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00:04:13,459 --> 00:04:15,660
you pretend to be sighted one more time,
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00:04:15,695 --> 00:04:19,047
and we cash the check with
all the nice commas and zeros.
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00:04:19,081 --> 00:04:20,915
- Glen.
- Mel.
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00:04:20,933 --> 00:04:22,634
We've done it this long.
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00:04:22,668 --> 00:04:24,653
Just do it one more time.
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00:04:24,687 --> 00:04:26,454
I'm asking as your business partner,
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00:04:26,489 --> 00:04:28,823
as your brother, and as a new boat owner
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00:04:28,858 --> 00:04:32,761
who did not fully research marina fees.
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00:04:32,795 --> 00:04:34,930
Are you sure this is necessary?
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00:04:34,964 --> 00:04:37,398
Essential! As your best friend,
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00:04:37,416 --> 00:04:38,833
I cannot, in good conscience,
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00:04:38,867 --> 00:04:40,301
watch you go down in flames anymore.
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00:04:40,319 --> 00:04:42,704
- Must be a drag.
- It's a real bummer.
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00:04:42,738 --> 00:04:44,706
What you need is confidence,
so I'm gonna give you
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00:04:44,724 --> 00:04:46,241
the Runyen premium package make-over.
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00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:47,909
You do this every day?
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00:04:47,943 --> 00:04:50,178
You think all this just happens?
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00:04:50,212 --> 00:04:51,813
I'm up at 5:00 A.M...
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00:04:51,831 --> 00:04:54,349
hair, exfoliator, body spray.
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00:04:54,383 --> 00:04:56,451
Then I watch the sun rise.
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Close your eyes.
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00:04:58,137 --> 00:05:00,822
Hurry. I gotta walk Elvis.
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00:05:00,856 --> 00:05:03,324
While I was learning the
benefits of hair spray,
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00:05:03,342 --> 00:05:06,044
mom was learning the benefits
of her new study partner.
135
00:05:06,078 --> 00:05:08,330
All right, "what is an effective means
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00:05:08,364 --> 00:05:11,066
of engaging a shy personality?"
137
00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:13,401
I'm gonna go with...
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00:05:13,436 --> 00:05:14,603
Chardonnay.
139
00:05:14,637 --> 00:05:16,905
Oh, my gosh, Joyce, you're hilarious.
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00:05:18,591 --> 00:05:20,525
And then mom got an idea.
141
00:05:20,559 --> 00:05:22,777
- I'm writing it.
- Hilarious?
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00:05:22,811 --> 00:05:24,546
You think I'm hilarious? What a compliment,
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00:05:24,580 --> 00:05:26,715
coming from someone as cool as you.
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00:05:26,749 --> 00:05:28,350
Oh, hey, Katie-Cat, how was your day?
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00:05:28,384 --> 00:05:29,801
Mm.
146
00:05:29,835 --> 00:05:32,103
That's eye roll for, "I had
a delightful day, mother."
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00:05:32,154 --> 00:05:34,789
"Thank you for taking
an interest in my life."
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00:05:34,807 --> 00:05:35,807
Katie.
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00:05:35,841 --> 00:05:37,826
This is my psych partner, Amelie.
150
00:05:37,860 --> 00:05:39,327
- Hey.
- Hey.
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00:05:39,345 --> 00:05:41,529
- I like your shirt.
- Oh, thanks.
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00:05:41,564 --> 00:05:42,914
Yeah, it's cool, right?
153
00:05:42,965 --> 00:05:44,165
Are you into the Black Keys?
154
00:05:44,183 --> 00:05:45,150
They're awesome.
155
00:05:45,184 --> 00:05:46,918
- I totally heart Dan Auerbach.
- Right?
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00:05:46,953 --> 00:05:48,053
Oh, yeah. Although right now,
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00:05:48,087 --> 00:05:49,904
I'm in a total Arcade Fire phase.
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Oh, me too!
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00:05:50,973 --> 00:05:52,073
You know they're having that secret show
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00:05:52,107 --> 00:05:53,425
at the Draft House this week?
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00:05:53,476 --> 00:05:55,176
I know! It's sold out.
It's completely sold out.
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00:05:55,194 --> 00:05:57,111
It's killing me. They're so awesome!
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So awesome. I love arcades.
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She has no idea who they are.
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00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:03,218
The last concert she went to
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00:06:03,252 --> 00:06:05,403
was Bruce Springsteen in the late '80s.
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00:06:05,438 --> 00:06:07,122
Oh, my God.
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00:06:07,156 --> 00:06:08,289
I know, right?
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00:06:08,307 --> 00:06:11,543
No, that is so rad.
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00:06:11,577 --> 00:06:12,894
- It is?
- It is?
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00:06:12,928 --> 00:06:15,530
I mean, Arcade Fire was totally
influenced by Springsteen.
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00:06:15,564 --> 00:06:17,082
- Really?
- Yeah.
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00:06:17,133 --> 00:06:19,117
Seriously, what was the concert like?
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Oh, you don't wanna hear about...
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00:06:22,955 --> 00:06:24,472
I saw him in Jersey.
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00:06:24,507 --> 00:06:27,659
It was the best six hours of my life.
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00:06:27,693 --> 00:06:29,828
He sweat on me.
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00:06:29,862 --> 00:06:31,212
- Like, it landed on my cheek.
- Oh, my gosh!
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00:06:31,246 --> 00:06:32,464
You were basically one step removed
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00:06:32,498 --> 00:06:33,765
from making out with him.
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00:06:33,799 --> 00:06:36,117
- Isn't that cool?
- It's a bodily fluid.
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00:06:39,655 --> 00:06:41,656
While I was taking Elvis for a walk,
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00:06:41,674 --> 00:06:43,825
I also took my new look for a spin.
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00:06:43,843 --> 00:06:46,344
I was cool. I was confident.
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00:06:46,379 --> 00:06:49,431
I was... cupcakes!
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00:06:53,936 --> 00:06:55,420
Man.
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00:06:56,672 --> 00:06:58,523
Loophole!
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00:06:58,557 --> 00:07:00,025
Hey, it didn't say anything about the dog
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00:07:00,059 --> 00:07:02,176
having to be with a blind guy.
190
00:07:02,194 --> 00:07:04,229
Heads up! Let the blind kid through.
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00:07:04,280 --> 00:07:05,513
Oh, no, I'm not...
192
00:07:05,548 --> 00:07:07,449
Hey, don't just stand
there. Give him a hand!
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00:07:07,483 --> 00:07:08,700
Right this way.
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00:07:08,734 --> 00:07:11,018
I discovered that people
treat you differently
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00:07:11,037 --> 00:07:12,186
when you're blind.
196
00:07:12,204 --> 00:07:15,373
Hey, buddy! How are you?
197
00:07:17,192 --> 00:07:20,528
Look at me groping at my guide dog.
198
00:07:20,546 --> 00:07:23,631
Oh, so that was dark chocolate
199
00:07:23,666 --> 00:07:25,667
and this is white chocolate.
200
00:07:25,701 --> 00:07:27,752
Gosh, I can't see white...
201
00:07:27,803 --> 00:07:29,921
but at least now I know
what it tastes like.
202
00:07:29,972 --> 00:07:32,057
Now, before you say I'm going to hell,
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00:07:32,091 --> 00:07:32,674
I'd like to remind you
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00:07:32,675 --> 00:07:35,042
that the only reason I
had a guide dog with me
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00:07:35,061 --> 00:07:37,211
is because I take care of a blind guy.
206
00:07:37,229 --> 00:07:40,315
Hey, Henry, I'm gonna have my
daughter Sophia walk you home.
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00:07:40,349 --> 00:07:41,683
Sophia!
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00:07:41,717 --> 00:07:45,270
Oh, no, that's very
kind, but I don't need...
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00:07:45,321 --> 00:07:48,389
help after the first few blocks.
210
00:07:48,407 --> 00:07:51,359
I heard a lot of traffic out there.
211
00:07:51,393 --> 00:07:53,278
Yeah, maybe I'm going to hell.
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00:07:57,316 --> 00:07:58,314
Good boy.
213
00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:00,088
Forward!
214
00:08:00,122 --> 00:08:02,357
Oh. So he can go with you anywhere?
215
00:08:02,391 --> 00:08:04,609
Yeah. To the store. On an airplane.
216
00:08:04,627 --> 00:08:06,377
To court. Court?
217
00:08:06,411 --> 00:08:07,929
Yeah, I ... I mean...
218
00:08:07,963 --> 00:08:09,797
He'll go with me when I'm a lawyer.
219
00:08:09,832 --> 00:08:11,332
What are your dreams?
220
00:08:11,367 --> 00:08:13,935
Okay. I was inching into a moral gray area.
221
00:08:13,969 --> 00:08:15,570
So how often are you at your dad's?
222
00:08:15,604 --> 00:08:17,722
Oh, careful. Skateboarder on your left.
223
00:08:21,327 --> 00:08:23,044
I'll get to the restaurant early.
224
00:08:23,078 --> 00:08:25,063
That way, I can get a
couple of drinks into Tom.
225
00:08:25,097 --> 00:08:26,381
- And then you arrive.
- Right.
226
00:08:26,415 --> 00:08:27,715
Without my four-legged wingman.
227
00:08:27,750 --> 00:08:30,552
- Sorry, Elvis.
- The host stand is four steps to your left.
228
00:08:30,603 --> 00:08:32,186
- To my left.
- The hostess's name is...
229
00:08:32,221 --> 00:08:33,254
Gayle.
230
00:08:33,289 --> 00:08:35,089
Why do I need to know that?
231
00:08:35,140 --> 00:08:37,375
She's single and attractive.
232
00:08:37,409 --> 00:08:39,060
- Hello, Gayle.
- Then you cross over to...
233
00:08:39,111 --> 00:08:41,162
You know what, we've done
this like a million times.
234
00:08:41,196 --> 00:08:42,630
I got it. Besides, I'm talking to Gayle.
235
00:08:42,665 --> 00:08:44,182
You mind?
236
00:08:44,216 --> 00:08:46,200
How long have you been a hostess?
237
00:08:49,722 --> 00:08:51,055
Hey.
238
00:08:51,090 --> 00:08:52,490
- Hi.
- Do you have the key
239
00:08:52,524 --> 00:08:54,225
to the storage cabinet in the garage?
240
00:08:54,259 --> 00:08:57,595
Yes. And apparently, you
have a key to my apartment.
241
00:08:57,629 --> 00:08:59,080
- Trade ya!
- Deal.
242
00:08:59,114 --> 00:09:00,531
It was Henry's anyway. Thanks.
243
00:09:00,565 --> 00:09:02,984
I just need to get my trunk
of old clothes to show Katie.
244
00:09:03,018 --> 00:09:04,385
- "Why?" You ask.
- Not asking.
245
00:09:04,420 --> 00:09:07,672
Because I have a cool new
friend who thinks I'm cool
246
00:09:07,690 --> 00:09:09,741
and she's making Katie think I'm cool.
247
00:09:09,775 --> 00:09:11,359
It is all way cool.
248
00:09:11,393 --> 00:09:13,411
- Cool!
- Yes, it is.
249
00:09:13,445 --> 00:09:15,797
Katie and I are on the
express train to bestie town.
250
00:09:15,848 --> 00:09:17,949
Ugh. Don't tell her I said that.
251
00:09:17,983 --> 00:09:19,250
That was very not cool.
252
00:09:19,268 --> 00:09:21,569
While you're in there, inside that cabinet,
253
00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:24,588
top shelf... there's a box with
a leather photo album in it,
254
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:26,658
pictures from when Katie was a baby.
255
00:09:26,692 --> 00:09:28,393
See if you can find one of you holding her
256
00:09:28,427 --> 00:09:30,378
when you first became a mother.
257
00:09:30,412 --> 00:09:32,797
Might remind you that you're her mother.
258
00:09:32,815 --> 00:09:34,432
Look, I just don't want
to be the kind of mother
259
00:09:34,450 --> 00:09:36,384
that's off in some room baking a cake
260
00:09:36,418 --> 00:09:38,486
and nagging her about curfew.
261
00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:40,071
First of all...
262
00:09:40,089 --> 00:09:41,356
You don't bake.
263
00:09:41,390 --> 00:09:42,506
If you did, you would know
264
00:09:42,524 --> 00:09:44,909
that "the other room" is called a kitchen.
265
00:09:44,927 --> 00:09:46,511
- Second of all...
- Goodbye, Mel.
266
00:09:46,545 --> 00:09:47,779
Bye.
267
00:09:47,813 --> 00:09:51,366
Makes sense. Use a cute dog to get a girl.
268
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:53,468
Why didn't I think of that?
269
00:09:53,502 --> 00:09:55,119
Sneaky's my wheelhouse.
270
00:09:55,153 --> 00:09:57,755
And dude, she's 14 1/2.
271
00:09:57,773 --> 00:10:00,575
She keeps asking when she can come over.
272
00:10:00,626 --> 00:10:02,593
Okay, two questions.
273
00:10:02,627 --> 00:10:04,912
Can I use the dog on Saturday?
274
00:10:04,947 --> 00:10:06,164
And why can't you just say yes?
275
00:10:06,198 --> 00:10:08,049
Why are you always like this?
276
00:10:08,083 --> 00:10:11,536
Wow. This is cool. What's
the story with this?
277
00:10:11,570 --> 00:10:13,254
I wore that to Scott Cawley's
278
00:10:13,305 --> 00:10:15,089
birthday/learn to French party.
279
00:10:15,124 --> 00:10:17,909
While Elvis made it possible
for me to talk to a girl,
280
00:10:17,943 --> 00:10:19,510
Amelie made it possible for mom and Katie
281
00:10:19,528 --> 00:10:20,795
to talk to each other.
282
00:10:20,829 --> 00:10:22,079
Take it, it's yours.
283
00:10:22,097 --> 00:10:23,264
- Oh, my gosh.
- Wow!
284
00:10:23,315 --> 00:10:25,316
- That's so awesome.
- Thanks!
285
00:10:25,334 --> 00:10:26,784
Oh, my gosh, the leather's so soft.
286
00:10:26,818 --> 00:10:28,019
That's not leather.
287
00:10:28,053 --> 00:10:29,821
And you might wanna keep
that away from an open flame.
288
00:10:29,855 --> 00:10:31,489
- Oh, okay.
- Instead of grunts
289
00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:33,608
and door slams, they were actually
290
00:10:33,642 --> 00:10:34,892
- communicating with words.
- Do you like it?
291
00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:36,894
Yeah! It looks so good!
292
00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:38,629
And other happy lady noises.
293
00:10:38,647 --> 00:10:39,981
- Love it? You love it?
- It's amazing.
294
00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:41,065
Don't freak out.
295
00:10:41,083 --> 00:10:42,900
Okay, my friend who works at the label
296
00:10:42,935 --> 00:10:45,403
just scored me tickets to
Arcade Fire tomorrow night.
297
00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:47,538
- Seriously?
- Are you in?
298
00:10:47,573 --> 00:10:49,824
Yes! Yes! I'm in! I'm in.
299
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:52,393
Oh, my gosh!
300
00:10:52,428 --> 00:10:56,247
Fun! That's so fun for you two fun gals.
301
00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:58,816
Wait, you totally have to
score a ticket for my mom.
302
00:10:58,851 --> 00:11:00,001
She's never seen them.
303
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:02,437
- Yeah! Joyce.
- I mean, if you wanna come.
304
00:11:02,471 --> 00:11:05,139
I think I'm available.
305
00:11:05,174 --> 00:11:07,258
Tomorrow's the 14th, right?
306
00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:08,726
Yeah, I can make that work.
307
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,845
- No, it's the 15th.
- Yeah, I can make that work.
308
00:11:10,879 --> 00:11:12,296
Ooh! We're going to Arcade Fire!
309
00:11:12,314 --> 00:11:14,415
- There's no other explanation.
- You're right.
310
00:11:14,450 --> 00:11:18,169
You know what it is, the
cars are using people as fuel.
311
00:11:18,187 --> 00:11:19,970
- Oh, my God, I need the dog.
- What?
312
00:11:19,988 --> 00:11:22,006
Elvis. You gotta hand me the harness
313
00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:23,941
- so I can pretend to be blind.
- You... blind? What?
314
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,710
It's for a girl. An older girl.
315
00:11:25,744 --> 00:11:28,012
She wears cool glasses and
smells like jolly ranchers
316
00:11:28,046 --> 00:11:29,330
and I brushed against her ribcage.
317
00:11:29,364 --> 00:11:31,699
Please! I need to be blind
and you need to be sighted.
318
00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:33,701
Okay, Henry, there is
absolutely no way I'm gonna...
319
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:35,453
Henry!
320
00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:38,589
Hi, it's me, Sophia. Is this your father?
321
00:11:38,623 --> 00:11:41,676
Come on, dad. Help the blind kid.
322
00:11:41,727 --> 00:11:44,479
Mel Fisher. Cool glasses.
323
00:11:44,513 --> 00:11:47,148
Oh, thanks.
324
00:11:53,054 --> 00:11:56,005
I don't know if I was as good
325
00:11:56,056 --> 00:11:57,140
at playing blind as dad
was at playing sighted.
326
00:11:57,174 --> 00:11:58,291
Yeah. He's my furry little copilot.
327
00:11:58,325 --> 00:12:00,710
Kind of like my own personal Chewbacca.
328
00:12:01,812 --> 00:12:04,230
But I was crushing it with cupcake girl.
329
00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:07,166
You're so funny! He's so funny.
330
00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:08,968
So funny!
331
00:12:09,003 --> 00:12:12,055
Well, hey, I am so glad
I ran into you guys.
332
00:12:12,089 --> 00:12:14,223
I wanted to give you my number
333
00:12:14,258 --> 00:12:16,209
in case you ever need any help,
334
00:12:16,243 --> 00:12:18,745
you know, fighting the empire.
335
00:12:22,750 --> 00:12:24,384
Dad, why don't you just take it?
336
00:12:24,418 --> 00:12:25,902
It's probably right in front of you.
337
00:12:27,755 --> 00:12:28,954
Bye.
338
00:12:28,973 --> 00:12:30,940
See ya!
339
00:12:32,793 --> 00:12:35,311
What is wrong with you? You
cannot pretend to be blind.
340
00:12:35,346 --> 00:12:38,147
Says the man who pretended
to be sighted for 20 years.
341
00:12:38,182 --> 00:12:39,732
No, that was totally different.
342
00:12:39,767 --> 00:12:41,317
That was a professional thing,
343
00:12:41,352 --> 00:12:43,269
and I'd just graduated from law school.
344
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:45,421
I didn't want people
treating me differently.
345
00:12:45,456 --> 00:12:46,906
Yeah. So you lied.
346
00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:48,307
I didn't want anyone's pity.
347
00:12:48,325 --> 00:12:50,109
Well, I do.
348
00:12:50,127 --> 00:12:53,279
Pity's working for me. Pity
was my foot in the door.
349
00:12:53,313 --> 00:12:55,164
Buddy...
350
00:12:55,215 --> 00:12:56,516
You don't need to play games
351
00:12:56,550 --> 00:12:58,584
to get someone to like you, okay?
352
00:12:58,619 --> 00:13:00,737
And you don't need crunchy hair.
353
00:13:00,771 --> 00:13:02,021
Just be yourself.
354
00:13:02,039 --> 00:13:05,608
I have a 12-year track
record of that never working.
355
00:13:05,642 --> 00:13:07,410
I'll tell you what never works.
356
00:13:07,461 --> 00:13:09,979
Lying about who you are.
357
00:13:11,482 --> 00:13:13,532
Well, I'm sure he'll be here soon.
358
00:13:13,550 --> 00:13:14,967
I mean, you know Mel.
359
00:13:14,985 --> 00:13:18,187
He probably stopped at the
club to sneak in nine holes.
360
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:20,590
You son of a bitch.
361
00:13:20,624 --> 00:13:22,075
What?
362
00:13:22,109 --> 00:13:24,744
You handsome son of a bitch!
363
00:13:24,778 --> 00:13:27,196
You know what they have here? A great mint.
364
00:13:27,231 --> 00:13:29,732
I'm gonna go get one, and
I'll bring it back to you.
365
00:13:29,767 --> 00:13:33,636
Please check out the wine list, will you?
366
00:13:33,670 --> 00:13:36,188
Hangin' at the club with my homegirls!
367
00:13:37,925 --> 00:13:38,858
What?
368
00:13:38,892 --> 00:13:41,494
You just need one more thing.
369
00:13:41,528 --> 00:13:42,595
Oh.
370
00:13:42,629 --> 00:13:44,781
We're sharing accessories!
371
00:13:44,815 --> 00:13:46,249
Ah!
372
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:47,867
- We're best friends!
- Oh, shoot.
373
00:13:47,885 --> 00:13:49,268
Joyce, did you bring an I.D.?
374
00:13:49,303 --> 00:13:52,705
Uh, I doubt anyone's
gonna think I'm under 21.
375
00:13:54,224 --> 00:13:57,377
But in this cute top, I
better just play it safe.
376
00:13:57,411 --> 00:14:00,480
Oh, wait! If it's 21-and-over,
Katie can't get inside.
377
00:14:00,514 --> 00:14:01,664
Shoot.
378
00:14:01,698 --> 00:14:03,282
Well, I mean, if we're all dressed up,
379
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:04,851
should we just rock pinkberry?
380
00:14:04,885 --> 00:14:06,352
No, don't worry. I got her a fake I.D.
381
00:14:06,370 --> 00:14:08,221
Yeah! If anyone asks,
382
00:14:08,255 --> 00:14:10,523
I'm Florence Stuart from Cerritos,
383
00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:12,809
and I am way too fond of blue eyeliner.
384
00:14:12,843 --> 00:14:14,060
- But...
- Don't worry.
385
00:14:14,094 --> 00:14:15,611
I'm not gonna be drinking.
386
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:18,798
I just can't miss seeing
this band at a small venue.
387
00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:20,199
Sure...
388
00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:21,367
Yeah.
389
00:14:21,401 --> 00:14:22,735
'Cause they kick ass.
390
00:14:22,753 --> 00:14:24,303
- You're cool, right?
- Are you kidding me?
391
00:14:24,337 --> 00:14:25,971
Yes, Cerritos, I am cool.
392
00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:31,027
This is gonna be so much fun, Florence.
393
00:14:31,061 --> 00:14:32,612
Yeah, Joyce.
394
00:14:32,646 --> 00:14:34,330
Come on. Go, go, go.
395
00:14:38,419 --> 00:14:39,952
No, not cool. Not cool at all!
396
00:14:39,970 --> 00:14:41,721
You're not gonna break
the law to get into a club.
397
00:14:41,755 --> 00:14:43,739
Oh, my God! I knew you would do this.
398
00:14:43,791 --> 00:14:46,109
I knew you would ruin this for me.
399
00:14:46,143 --> 00:14:48,528
I blame you. That girl's 16 years old.
400
00:14:48,562 --> 00:14:49,712
She doesn't even know where Cerritos is.
401
00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:50,830
You have one job. Do it well.
402
00:14:50,864 --> 00:14:53,166
God, those are big!
403
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,635
You take supplements
or... have a good night.
404
00:14:56,820 --> 00:14:58,955
With that dog, it looks like you're blind.
405
00:14:59,006 --> 00:15:01,107
- What are you doing?
- I'm telling the truth.
406
00:15:01,141 --> 00:15:03,025
I owe it to myself and to Henry.
407
00:15:03,060 --> 00:15:05,011
No. You owe it to me.
408
00:15:05,045 --> 00:15:06,179
Come on, Glen.
409
00:15:06,213 --> 00:15:07,680
I'm the one who read you comic books.
410
00:15:07,714 --> 00:15:09,148
I'm the one who drove you to law school.
411
00:15:09,183 --> 00:15:11,334
I'm the one who alphabetically arranged
412
00:15:11,368 --> 00:15:13,719
the work refrigerator
so you could find things.
413
00:15:13,737 --> 00:15:15,621
Yeah. Why are the pickles always under "C"?
414
00:15:15,656 --> 00:15:18,057
Because it's a condiment! Come on, boy.
415
00:15:18,091 --> 00:15:19,959
Why is everybody stealing my dog?
416
00:15:19,977 --> 00:15:22,361
- I'm tying him up outside.
- Well, good luck with that.
417
00:15:22,395 --> 00:15:24,897
He's trained to stay by my side, so...
418
00:15:24,915 --> 00:15:27,416
Oh! We'll get you another one.
419
00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:30,169
Whoa! Yeah, he's a good boy! Yeah.
420
00:15:30,203 --> 00:15:32,522
Look, this is not just for me.
421
00:15:32,556 --> 00:15:34,023
This is about our firm.
422
00:15:34,057 --> 00:15:36,559
I care deeply about each and every one
423
00:15:36,610 --> 00:15:38,678
- of the 35 people we...
- 38.
424
00:15:38,712 --> 00:15:40,279
Whatever!
425
00:15:40,313 --> 00:15:42,281
They're counting on us, Mel.
426
00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:43,583
All right.
427
00:15:43,617 --> 00:15:45,751
But there's $40,000 worth
of training in this dog.
428
00:15:45,786 --> 00:15:47,837
It's crazy to just tie him up outside.
429
00:15:47,871 --> 00:15:50,840
Yeah. That'd be crazy.
430
00:15:52,759 --> 00:15:55,878
Who's a good boy?
431
00:15:55,929 --> 00:15:57,380
I'd like to check this, please.
432
00:15:57,431 --> 00:15:58,431
Oh.
433
00:16:04,108 --> 00:16:06,389
- Tom, can I top off your wine?
- Are you kidding?
434
00:16:06,405 --> 00:16:07,693
Look at that eager beaver holding it out
435
00:16:07,727 --> 00:16:11,246
just to your left.
436
00:16:11,264 --> 00:16:12,698
Oh, me next! Yeah... whoa!
437
00:16:12,732 --> 00:16:14,316
I'm a freak for good chardonnay!
438
00:16:16,135 --> 00:16:20,422
Oh! Oh... before I forget.
439
00:16:20,456 --> 00:16:21,356
Is that a check?
440
00:16:21,391 --> 00:16:22,758
Yes, it is. It's a check.
441
00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:24,560
How 'bout that? A check!
442
00:16:24,594 --> 00:16:28,447
Here is your annual retainer up front.
443
00:16:28,481 --> 00:16:29,631
Will you look at that, Mel?
444
00:16:29,666 --> 00:16:32,284
He is extending the check directly to you.
445
00:16:33,886 --> 00:16:36,021
Tom, thank you so much.
446
00:16:36,072 --> 00:16:37,756
And understand, this is more than just...
447
00:16:37,790 --> 00:16:39,791
Numbers on a piece of paper to us.
448
00:16:39,826 --> 00:16:42,060
This is a symbol of the ongoing trust
449
00:16:42,111 --> 00:16:44,630
that you place in us.
450
00:16:44,664 --> 00:16:46,081
And that is the cornerstone
451
00:16:46,115 --> 00:16:47,849
of any great business relationship.
452
00:16:47,884 --> 00:16:49,935
And believe me, that fact...
453
00:16:49,969 --> 00:16:51,570
Fire! Check's on fire! Check's on fire!
454
00:16:51,604 --> 00:16:54,056
Fire! What the hell?
455
00:16:54,090 --> 00:16:55,290
What the hell's going on?
456
00:16:55,324 --> 00:16:58,343
- Oh! The candle!
- That's what I smelled.
457
00:17:00,613 --> 00:17:02,965
Why did you put concealer on to begin with?
458
00:17:02,999 --> 00:17:05,417
Runyen wanted to cover up my problem areas.
459
00:17:06,703 --> 00:17:08,754
Hey, don't take it out on my face.
460
00:17:08,788 --> 00:17:10,672
She says she wants to be my friend...
461
00:17:10,707 --> 00:17:12,507
Easy! You're about to hit bone.
462
00:17:12,541 --> 00:17:14,860
And then she suddenly
switches into parent mode.
463
00:17:14,894 --> 00:17:16,395
But aren't you always saying
464
00:17:16,429 --> 00:17:17,996
she should stop trying to be your friend
465
00:17:18,031 --> 00:17:21,216
and act more like a mom?
466
00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:23,435
My face was finally clean,
467
00:17:23,469 --> 00:17:25,737
and dad's conscience was about to be.
468
00:17:25,772 --> 00:17:27,990
You've been blind this whole time?
469
00:17:28,024 --> 00:17:29,608
Since I was 12.
470
00:17:29,642 --> 00:17:30,976
But you helped me pick out that suit
471
00:17:31,027 --> 00:17:32,060
for my niece's wedding.
472
00:17:32,095 --> 00:17:33,578
Well, technically, Glen did.
473
00:17:33,613 --> 00:17:35,764
And you looked super sharp.
474
00:17:35,798 --> 00:17:38,900
You test drove my $100,000 car.
475
00:17:40,386 --> 00:17:43,138
- Nice ride, Tom.
- Yep. Really hugs the road.
476
00:17:44,540 --> 00:17:45,674
Really hugs it.
477
00:17:45,708 --> 00:17:47,059
Yeah, that was fun.
478
00:17:47,093 --> 00:17:48,777
But that does not change the fact
479
00:17:48,811 --> 00:17:50,712
that we are as dedicated to serving you
480
00:17:50,747 --> 00:17:52,047
as we have ever been.
481
00:17:52,081 --> 00:17:54,449
I have never been so
snowed in my entire life!
482
00:17:54,484 --> 00:17:56,535
You're like a... you're
like some kind of a...
483
00:17:56,586 --> 00:17:59,321
Superhero!
484
00:17:59,355 --> 00:18:00,939
A superhero?
485
00:18:00,973 --> 00:18:03,125
Who still represents you in
all forms of legal activity,
486
00:18:03,159 --> 00:18:04,426
both corporate and personal?
487
00:18:04,460 --> 00:18:06,378
Hey, you've always done
top-shelf work for me.
488
00:18:06,412 --> 00:18:08,747
As long as that continues,
I'm not going anywhere.
489
00:18:08,781 --> 00:18:10,732
See? Mel?
490
00:18:10,766 --> 00:18:12,884
I always say, honesty is the best policy.
491
00:18:12,919 --> 00:18:16,388
Honestly, Glen, you're paying for dinner.
492
00:18:16,422 --> 00:18:19,307
And that lady's lamb chop.
493
00:18:19,342 --> 00:18:21,677
So...
494
00:18:21,711 --> 00:18:24,513
Anyway, I'm sorry I lied to you, but...
495
00:18:24,547 --> 00:18:26,982
hopefully, you'll find it charming
496
00:18:27,016 --> 00:18:28,533
how far I went to be your boyfriend?
497
00:18:28,568 --> 00:18:30,068
Boyfriend?
498
00:18:30,103 --> 00:18:33,188
Yeah, you... gave me your number.
499
00:18:33,222 --> 00:18:36,675
Well, I gave it to your
dad so I could babysit you.
500
00:18:36,726 --> 00:18:39,194
What?
501
00:18:39,228 --> 00:18:41,113
You just have your dad call me
502
00:18:41,147 --> 00:18:44,483
if you ever need a sitter.
503
00:18:44,517 --> 00:18:48,537
Dude, that was a disaster...
504
00:18:48,571 --> 00:18:50,272
and you are not Runyen.
505
00:18:50,306 --> 00:18:51,923
Nope.
506
00:18:51,958 --> 00:18:53,875
But... you heard all that?
507
00:18:53,910 --> 00:18:56,111
Yep.
508
00:18:56,145 --> 00:18:57,846
Good! I'm glad.
509
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:00,648
'Cause all girls should
know that I'm not smooth.
510
00:19:00,666 --> 00:19:02,267
Attention, ladies.
511
00:19:02,301 --> 00:19:03,935
I'm not smooth!
512
00:19:03,970 --> 00:19:05,854
Not smooth, I am.
513
00:19:05,888 --> 00:19:08,573
I get awkward and tongue-tied
around girls I like.
514
00:19:08,624 --> 00:19:11,059
And girls I don't like. And boys.
515
00:19:11,094 --> 00:19:14,196
Pretty much anyone who's not Runyen.
516
00:19:16,416 --> 00:19:19,584
Funny, you are.
517
00:19:21,571 --> 00:19:24,823
Dad was right. Being
yourself may not be easy,
518
00:19:24,857 --> 00:19:26,291
but it's the right thing to do.
519
00:19:29,579 --> 00:19:31,930
It got Jenny to notice me.
520
00:19:31,964 --> 00:19:33,482
So you used one girl
521
00:19:33,516 --> 00:19:35,550
to get another girl's attention?
522
00:19:35,585 --> 00:19:37,652
You're a playa, man!
523
00:19:37,687 --> 00:19:39,654
A varsity playa!
524
00:19:39,672 --> 00:19:41,306
It got dad a client for life.
525
00:19:41,340 --> 00:19:43,108
Appreciate your confidence.
526
00:19:51,667 --> 00:19:53,835
And it even brought mom and Katie closer.
527
00:19:53,939 --> 00:19:56,958
Oh, my God. Bruce Springsteen?
528
00:19:56,993 --> 00:19:59,044
Don't read too much into this.
529
00:19:59,078 --> 00:20:02,631
Well, a little closer.
530
00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:08,937
Okay, in the spirit of total honesty,
531
00:20:08,988 --> 00:20:12,056
I may have left one tiny thing out.
532
00:20:12,074 --> 00:20:14,726
Now, you know the upside
of dad being himself.
533
00:20:14,744 --> 00:20:17,061
But there's also a downside.
534
00:20:18,614 --> 00:20:21,065
- Blind man in a crosswalk!
- Are you insane?
535
00:20:21,083 --> 00:20:22,734
I'm not the idiot who was speeding!
536
00:20:22,752 --> 00:20:24,669
- Mel...
- What the...
537
00:20:24,704 --> 00:20:26,338
You dented my hood!
538
00:20:26,372 --> 00:20:28,456
What the hell is wrong with you?
539
00:20:28,507 --> 00:20:30,876
- Is that...
- Our former client. Yep.
540
00:20:30,910 --> 00:20:34,296
- Any point in...
- Oh, no, that ship has sailed.
541
00:20:34,347 --> 00:20:36,965
Along with your boat. Sorry.
542
00:20:39,966 --> 00:20:45,866
- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
38614
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