Original subtitles

- Danny?

What's going on?

JAX: Is that Phillip?

Em, look who's back.

- Oh, no.

[gasps]

[powers zapping]

- Mia, what are you doing?

- Get behind me, I'll get us out of here.

Nobody move.

Unless you want a million volts of lightning

right between the eyes!

- [growling] - Phillip, no!

- What are you doing?

- Creating a distraction so we can get out of here.

And you're kind of ruining it, so get behind me.

- Man, your super villain act needs some work.

Let's go.

[powers zapping]

- Don't move or the zombie boy gets it.

How's that? - Nobody's getting anything.

Mia, let them go.

- Things are getting out of hand,

send Mia to another land!

- No!

- Looks like you missed.

- What happened?

- It didn't work.

- That's because Jax is a weak wizard.

[laughing] Allow me.

- No, it's because--

- I need to go home,

so send Mia to Rome.

DIEGO: Wait!

- [imitating Jax] What happened?

[normal voice] This happened.

Thanks for reuniting the pieces for me, guys.

Now, you don't stand a chance against me.

Now...

Who should I pulverize first?

- Me.

[dramatic music]

[upbeat pop music]

WOMAN: * I cast a spell

* It takes a hold of you

* I see my dreams

* And they're all coming true *

* Come on

* Let's go *

* You and me together

* Look up ahead

* There's a magical adventure *

* Every witch way

* Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay

* I'm trying every witch way *

* Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay

* I'm going every witch way *

* Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay

* Every witch way

[knocking on door]

- Maddie-Winkie?

I ran out of that cucumber liver facial cream that I like.

Would you have some?

Uh... Maddie-Winkie?

Maddie?

Maddie... where are you?

Maddie-Winkie?

Where--where are you?

Maddie-Winkie? Oh, no!

[screaming] Maddie-Winkie!

Maddie!

[doorbell ringing]

- I'm coming. Hold your horses.

[gasping]

- Francisco, thank goodness you're awake.

- Ursula? What happened to you?

- Oh, the worst thing ever.

My Maddie-Winkie's not home.

Is she here?

- What? No!

I mean, you do realize that our daughters

aren't really friends, right?

- Well, I thought maybe she had another brace...

Brazen interest in being friends.

- Not that I know of.

- Well, my Maddie-Winkie's never out this late.

She's not answering her phone.

- Well, she's not here, I mean, Emma's already in bed.

- Could I ask Emma if she knows where Maddie might be?

- All right. - Thank you.

- Your zombie boyfriend stinks.

- What? No, he doesn't.

I mean, it's probably Diego's Kanay funk.

- No, it's not.

- Thank you.

- Diego's Kanay stink is way worse than this.

- Hey!

- Guys, stop it, we're all on the same side.

- Wait, how did he get here anyway?

- Phillip... save...

Andi.

- Yeah, great save.

- Yeah, how did he get here?

- Wait, what? I thought you took him out of the game.

- No. Jax?

- It wasn't me.

I was too busy "ah-oohing" with you.

- Yeah, right!

Why would I waste a perfectly good spell

on a stinky zombie?

- Hex.

- Excuse me, I was talking.

So rude!

- Hex...

help Phillip.

- The Hex?

- I didn't know the Hex could cast spells, that's--

- Awesome! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!

- Quiet!

What do you think this is, a party?

- Mia, no, they're just talking.

You gotta let 'em go.

- Why would I do that?

Now that they can't cast spells, this is my chance.

They have nothing to fight me with.

- Em?

Em, are you awake?

Emma? Mrs. Van Pelt needs to talk to you.

- Um... [clearing throat]

- Hmm? - Miss.

- [sighs]

Emma!

- She's not here!

You said she was here!

- I assumed she was.

I come in every night,

I say good night to her, but, tonight,

I was so angry at her, I didn't do that.

- Oh, no.

If they're both missing, it has to be ma...

...Gazine related.

- Oh, man, I should've come in

and said good night, I-I always do.

We need to call the police, the fire department, the army!

- The Council! - The what?

- The police... council.

- Oh, I shouldn't have grounded her.

- Oh, Francisco, don't blame yourself.

- You're right, I shouldn't.

I blame that no-good Daniel Miller.

I guarantee you, he's responsible for this.

- Yes! Absolutely!

How exactly?

- I'm calling his parents right now!

- Yes, yes, good idea.

We should also call Maddie-Winkie's Panthers.

- Wait, you didn't call them before coming over?

- Proxy, throw one of those lightning bolt thingies at Mia.

Now, while they're distracted.

- I don't know how.

The most I could do is a freezing wind.

Try casting another spell.

- What for? That crystal is messing everything up.

- This wasn't my plan. She just ruined it.

- Mia, this is all a big misunderstanding.

I'm sure we can work it out

if you just stop throwing fireballs at them.

[cell phone alerts beeping]

- What's that?

Some lame "witches in trouble" alert?

- No.

Worse. It's my dad.

- Oh, no, it's my mom.

- Wait, your dad called my dad?

- "Get home now,

you're in so much trouble, love, Mom."

- "I'm covering for you,

but you better get home ASAP, Gigi."

- I've got a Miss Information alert.

"Missing in Miami,

Daniel, Emma, Diego, Maddie, and Andi."

- We're in so much trouble.

- She didn't even mention me.

- I'm about to zap you with lightning

and that's what you're worried about?

- Well, this fight has been fun.

[chuckling] Top ten in my book.

But we gotta go.

- No! - [screaming]

- What part of "incinerate into ashes"

don't you all understand?

- Don't do that.

- Diego, no!

- That's my Proxy! [chuckles]

- Get out of here, fast.

- They won't hurt me, huh?

You're either with me or against me.

- Mia, it doesn't have to be like this.

- Em, try casting a spell.

- The crystal.

- This is a battle, not a party.

You don't get to leave 'cause Mommy and Daddy called.

- A spell.

- Mia, you don't have to do this.

- [scoffs] But I do.

- Emma, cast a spell!

- We need to get out of her reach,

so send Mia to a faraway beach.

[zapping]

- It worked.

You really are too powerful for the crystal.

And that's how it's done.

- Why are you celebrating?

It was Emma's spell, not yours.

- Guys?

You do realize she landed in the pool, right?

That's what, ten minutes walking distance?

- Uh, let's get out of here... fast.

- Uh, well, wait!

Phillip can't stay at my house.

He needs a place to crash.

Daniel! Old buddy, old pal!

[lively music]

*

- Well, we made it to my locker in one piece.

Thanks for bringing me to school...

and walking me to class.

- I will see you immediately after school in my office.

- Dad, I already apologized.

I was helping Andi with her...

- Uh, it takes exactly 46 seconds

to get from the chemistry lab to my office.

So no time for socializing in the halls.

- You know, you could just wipe his memory.

It's one of the perks of having a human parent.

- I don't want to; he's right.

I shouldn't have left the house like that.

And just let Mia turn Andi into a giant freezer pop?

- You're right. - Of course, I am.

And now that we know that the crystal

doesn't work on you, we have to go after Mia.

- We don't know that. My powers might be off.

- Didn't look like that to me.

I'll see you after class.

- [sighs]

- Oh, Andi.

You look nice.

New jacket?

- What? This old thing?

Nah.

Hey, Em, look, I got Hex this leather lotion.

You know, kind of like a little

"thank you for saving my butt" present.

- Are you sure it's not a "thank you

for bringing Phillip back" present?

- Eh, it works both ways.

What? - You know he can't stay.

Once the Council finds out there's a zombie running loose,

they'll send him back.

- But you won't, right?

Oh, I knew I could count on you.

And as for the Council, I have a plan.

I'm gonna get the crystal back

and blackmail them with it.

- You're what? - You heard me.

I'm gonna blackmail them into making Phillip human.

- I don't think they can do that.

- Oh.

But you can, right?

- Uh, me? How?

- Think about it.

You're the most powerful witch

and my best friend.

I mean, we can do whatever we want.

I mean, you.

You know, you can do whatever you want.

- [sighs]

I'm not sure I could.

- Just think about it, okay?

- And then we finally escaped Mia's basement.

- I can't believe I missed it.

I love lightning... and basements!

- My Proxy was spectacular.

[giggles]

His fireball was way better than Mia's.

- Ooh, fireballs?

I could've roasted marshmallows over them.

S'mores...

- Shh.

- Well, good morning, girls.

What can I get for you?

- Just a bagel for me.

- I know it's not Tuesday,

but do you have any tasty tacos?

- No.

Bagel or eggs, your choice.

- Ooh, that's a toughie.

- So what is this I hear about this fireball?

- Um...

Nothing.

Just, uh, something from a movie.

- Uh, yeah.

The romantic comedy of the year.

- About, uh, two lovestruck dragons.

They shoot fireballs as symbols of...

their affection.

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

- As liberator of the Council,

I expected more out of you.

- Wait, you told me that was a fake title

and that I couldn't use it anymore.

- Well, we were thinking about changing our minds.

But now I see your loyalty is with your friends.

- Oh.

I'm glad you understand.

- We do.

Hold on, Sophie.

Let me go see if there's any leftover tacos

from last Tuesday.

- Yummy!

So I went to Mia's house to find Proxy.

FYI, that basement needs some serious redecorating.

[chuckles] She had taken Andi prisoner.

And Proxy, oh, the hero... [chuckles]

Went to help her.

I think.

[gasping] He better not have gone to see Mia!

Anyway...

- Remember what we talked about, Phillip.

No biting, no growling,

and no brain eating.

- Brains? No.

Pizza, yes.

- Oh, right.

Try not to get any sauce on that tie.

It's my good one.

*

- Wait a minute. You?

What are you doing here?

To my office, right now!

- Then we all ran home.

Who would've thought that Emma

could do spells around the crystal and I couldn't.

That's so unfair.

I'm just as good a witch as she is.

Chosen One, Schmozen One.

But, Proxy, he was so brave--

- Stop.

- We need to contain this situation immediately.

- Well, I could talk to Mia if you want--

- He's not talking about the Kanay.

It's Emma.

The Cristal de Caballero did not stop her

from casting a spell.

This is a disaster.

- Oh, hold on, Agamemnon.

Thank you for your help.

Now, be gone.

- Hi, Katie.

- Sophie? Where did you come from?

- The nurse's office.

- Why do you sound like that?

- Like what?

- We need more information

from a reliable source. - Mm-hmm.

- We have one-- Emma.

- No, she's part of the problem.

The last time we couldn't control a Chosen One,

she almost destroyed the realm.

- You're not comparing Emma to the principal, are you?

- Well, if the shoes and the pointy hat fit.

[laughing] You see...

Ooh, I know who can help us.

[inhales deeply]

- The answer is exoskeleton...

You do realize that I just disappeared

from a room full of kids, right?

- It's been taken care of.

They won't even remember you were there.

- Great.

So why am I here?

- We want information about last night.

- Is it true that the Chosen One can cast a spell

in the presence of the Cristal de Caballero?

- I don't know, you're gonna have to ask her.

- We're asking you.

- Well, I'm not telling you,

and there's nothing you can...

Do about it. - Oh...

- [clears throat] - Really?

- Oh, no, not another animal, please!

*

- Be careful you don't break the memory card.

- I won't. It's just stuck.

I gotta pry it... open.

- Careful!

- Could you give me a little room?

Thanks again for covering for me last night.

- It was easy. Mom was busy cleaning,

and I started reading Dad my blog post,

and he fell asleep instantly.

Where were you, anyways?

- Uh... I was at Maddie's,

helping her with her homework.

- Okay, number one, you're a bad liar.

And number two, Katie does Maddie's homework.

Everybody knows that.

- But they're in a fight, remember?

- Oh, yeah.

Any scoop on that?

- No, and if there was, I wouldn't give it to you.

- But you owe me.

- Yeah, and that's why

I'm helping you with this.

- Yes! Thank you, thank you!

The water might have ruined it,

but at least you can try now.

What's on there anyway?

- Hours of juicy footage.

Plus, whatever happened in here

that ruined the camera in the first place.

I'm gonna catch whoever did this.

- Who does she think she is?

Sending me to the pool.

[scoffs]

She did say beach...

And I ended up at the pool.

But still...

It worked.

- Emma, wait up!

- What?

- We have a little problem.

- Little? It's huge.

Massive, enormous maximus.

- That's not even a word.

- Yeah, but it describes our situation.

Genius here brought Phillip to school.

- What am I supposed to do? Leave him at home

so he could eat my mom's brain for lunch?

- He wouldn't do that.

Although, you know what,

your mom's hair does smell great.

What shampoo does she use?

- Hello! Where is Phillip now?

- Your dad saw him and took us both to the office.

He let me go with three more detentions.

- Ah. How convenient.

- How is that convenient?

- Stop fighting.

So he's with my dad?

Alone?

Oh, we have to get in there.

- I know who can help.

*

- What's the emergency?

- Thanks for coming.

- You?

No, thank you, I'm out of here.

- No, don't go. It's not me.

It's Sophie.

- She looks fine to me.

- Trust me, she's not.

- I still don't get what the problem is.

- [gasping] Sophie! Stop imitating me!

- She's not. Desdemona gave her your voice.

- Wait. Desdemona?

Oh, that sneaky witchy lunch lady.

- Phillip hungry.

[bag rustling]

Pizza?

- Uh, no, no, thank you. No.

[knocking on door]

Come in!

Ursula.

What are you doing here?

- I am Phillip's legal guardian.

- You are?

- Yes. I am here to enroll him in school.

Here you go.

Now, I understand that

the two of you had a little...

disagreement last year.

- Little?

He tried to bite my ear off.

- Oh... [giggling]

No! No, no.

That was just a little...

traditional Transyl-Venetian, uh,

greeting thing.

But we have been teaching Phillip American customs.

Phillip?

- Nice to meet you.

- Hmm?

- [growling] - Ahh!

- No! Phillip, stop, stop!

Sit, heel!

- Joke, funny... [chuckling]

URSULA: [chuckling]

Okay, good, Phillip.

All right, is everything in order?

- Yes, everything's in order.

Ursula, I didn't know you wanted to have more children.

- Say what?

- It says here that you are adopting him.

- I what?

- Mom.

- The whole night was just insane.

- I know, but you didn't have to threaten everyone like that.

- They were all ganging up on me and wanted to take me out.

They even brought a zombie with them.

Witches I can deal with, but a zombie?

- I know, but I think he's actually pretty harmless now.

He even hugged Maddie this morning

to say sorry for almost eating her last year.

- Well, yeah, because he's biased towards witches.

Just like everyone else.

[sobbing]

- Oh, no, no-no-no-no.

Don't--don't cry.

Uh, I don't have a tissue,

but I'm gonna go get one.

- What's up, buddy? - Hey, man.

- Hey, Mia, are you okay?

- Well, well, well.

Look who it is. "Betray-go."

- Hey, I didn't try to betray anybody.

I was just trying to keep the peace.

- Which is a nicer way of saying

you're a traitor against all Kanay kind.

- Oh, Mrs. Jones, good.

Why is there a kangaroo in the hallway?

Hey, buddy, how are you?

Are you...

Ah, ah, ah!

- Oh, this better work.

Good thinking on the paperwork spell.

- I hope I gave her everything she needs.

We didn't have time to go through it.

- Yeah, Daniel should've just kept him at home.

- And let him eat his mom?

- Look, he wouldn't do that.

DANIEL: Help!

- What? Daniel? - Run!

There's a kangaroo!

- I'm adopting him?

- In there! - What! No!

- What are you do-- let go of us!

[all screaming]

*

[upbeat pop music]

*