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♪♪
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♪ I bet we've been
together for a million years ♪
3
00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:24,534
♪ And I bet we'll be
together for a million more ♪
4
00:00:24,558 --> 00:00:27,103
♪ Oh, it's like I
started breathing ♪
5
00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:29,906
♪ On the night we kissed ♪
6
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:35,111
♪ And I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪
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00:00:35,135 --> 00:00:43,135
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
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00:00:46,179 --> 00:00:52,428
♪ And there ain't no nothing we
can't love each other through ♪
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00:00:52,452 --> 00:00:57,600
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
10
00:00:57,624 --> 00:01:01,152
♪ Sha-la-la-la. ♪
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00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:08,077
First batch is done.
12
00:01:08,101 --> 00:01:09,579
Oh, boy, these look great!
13
00:01:09,603 --> 00:01:11,814
This is the best batch
of Christmas cookies
14
00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:13,783
to come out of
the Keaton kitchen.
15
00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:15,485
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
16
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:17,501
What's this one?
17
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Well, where did that come from?
18
00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:23,092
Alex made me do it.
19
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I think Alex gets a
little too caught up
20
00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:27,931
in the Christmas
spirit, don't you?
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00:01:27,955 --> 00:01:30,266
Well, I don't know
about him, but I sure do.
22
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Smell of cookies
23
00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:34,137
and hot cider and
warm dollar signs.
24
00:01:34,161 --> 00:01:36,539
And Christmas carols!
25
00:01:36,563 --> 00:01:38,408
♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪
26
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:40,076
♪ Jingle all the way ♪
27
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,679
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪
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00:01:42,703 --> 00:01:43,680
Hey.
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00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,114
♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪
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♪ Jingle all the way ♪
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00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:49,719
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪
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- Hey!
- ♪ Dashing through the snow ♪
33
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:53,423
♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
34
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,592
♪ O'er the fields we go ♪
35
00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:57,744
- ♪ Laughing all the way... ♪
- Ha-ha-ha!
36
00:01:59,086 --> 00:02:03,866
Uh... I like the ha-ha-ha part.
37
00:02:03,890 --> 00:02:05,401
♪ Bells on bobtail ring ♪
38
00:02:05,425 --> 00:02:07,170
♪ Making spirits bright ♪
39
00:02:07,194 --> 00:02:09,572
♪ What fun it is
to ride and sing ♪
40
00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:10,974
♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪
41
00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,542
♪ Oh! Jingle
bells, jingle bells ♪
42
00:02:12,566 --> 00:02:14,510
♪ Jingle all the way ♪
43
00:02:14,534 --> 00:02:18,281
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪
44
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:21,017
- Hey!
- ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪
45
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♪ Jingle all the way ♪
46
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:23,686
♪ Oh, what fun... ♪
47
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Hold it, hold it, hold
it, hold it, hold it.
48
00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:30,126
The traditional end
of fun has arrived.
49
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,729
No, no, I mean, I love Christmas
as much as the next guy.
50
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,897
I just don't know how
you can celebrate joyously
51
00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:37,800
when holiday retail sales
are down by four percent.
52
00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:40,055
Alex, you got your annual
card from the Reagans.
53
00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,573
"Dear Alex, how are we doing?"
54
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:46,009
A card? That's it?
55
00:02:46,033 --> 00:02:49,412
I sent them jams and jellies.
56
00:02:49,436 --> 00:02:51,180
I got a Christmas
card the other day
57
00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:52,982
from the Psychology
Club of America.
58
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,784
It said, "Have a
well-adjusted Christmas,
59
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:56,853
and a normal New Year."
60
00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,488
Oh, listen, I'm gonna go over
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00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:01,357
to Mr. Krewson's and place
our order for a Christmas tree.
62
00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:02,725
Anybody want to come?
63
00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:03,893
Oh, Steven, I thought we agreed
64
00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:05,662
to go somewhere else
for our tree this year.
65
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,930
- Why?
- Because, Dad, Mr. Krewson's
66
00:03:07,954 --> 00:03:08,998
trees are terrible.
67
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,801
They look like hat racks.
68
00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:14,470
Look, Mr. Krewson is
one of the last remaining
69
00:03:14,494 --> 00:03:16,806
independent Christmas
tree distributors in Ohio.
70
00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:20,076
It's our duty to keep
guys like him in business.
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00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,210
Yeah, I like Krewson's.
72
00:03:21,234 --> 00:03:22,879
Is-Isn't he the
guy with the shack
73
00:03:22,903 --> 00:03:26,282
and those scrawny little
dried-out dwarf trees?
74
00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:28,918
Well... right, right.
75
00:03:28,942 --> 00:03:31,421
I always wondered
who bought trees there.
76
00:03:31,445 --> 00:03:33,523
Now you know.
77
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:35,425
Look, I talked to Krewson,
he said he'd get us
78
00:03:35,449 --> 00:03:36,826
a great tree this year.
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00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:38,728
I want to give him a
chance to come through.
80
00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:39,762
Now, who's coming with me?
81
00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:41,097
I'll go, Dad.
82
00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:43,784
I would like to see
trees that I'm taller than.
83
00:03:45,358 --> 00:03:47,103
Yeah, I'll go with
you too, Mr. Keaton.
84
00:03:47,127 --> 00:03:48,538
Well, that's very
nice of you, Nick.
85
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,006
Right in the tradition
of brotherhood
86
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:51,307
and good will towards men.
87
00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:53,543
Well, you know, I figured
it was the least I could do,
88
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,211
I mean, since I'm spending
Christmas with you.
89
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,447
Yeah! What?
90
00:03:57,471 --> 00:03:59,182
- Happy, happy, everybody!
- Hey, Skip.
91
00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:02,018
Alex, I need a
Christmas favor from you.
92
00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:04,053
You know how I usually play
Santa Claus down at the mall?
93
00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,988
- Uh-huh.
- Well, I got to get out of it.
94
00:04:06,012 --> 00:04:07,523
Why, you going out
of town this year?
95
00:04:07,547 --> 00:04:09,225
No, I'm going to be the
Abominable Snowman
96
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,327
over at the Pearl
Ridge Shopping Center.
97
00:04:11,351 --> 00:04:13,863
It pays less, but it's a
real career move for me.
98
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:16,632
It helps round out my
resume, and it gives me that in
99
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:19,535
for that big Easter Bunny
job I've been looking for.
100
00:04:19,559 --> 00:04:21,471
You want Alex to
play Santa Claus?
101
00:04:21,495 --> 00:04:24,040
He'll traumatize an entire
generation of young children.
102
00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,308
Hey, don't worry about it.
103
00:04:25,332 --> 00:04:28,144
I got better things to
do than say "Ho, ho, ho!"
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00:04:28,168 --> 00:04:29,979
to a bunch of spoiled,
greedy little kids.
105
00:04:30,003 --> 00:04:31,280
Pays $10 an hour.
106
00:04:31,304 --> 00:04:34,684
Ho, ho, ho! Ho, ho.
107
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:38,387
Okay, now, we're forgetting
about the finger paints.
108
00:04:38,411 --> 00:04:40,723
We're forgetting
about the Lego set.
109
00:04:40,747 --> 00:04:42,925
Instead...
110
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:48,581
Santa is gonna bring you 100
shares of Aramco Petroleum.
111
00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:57,073
Now, Santa invests heavily
in this, and, uh... ho, ho, ho!
112
00:04:57,097 --> 00:05:00,090
Santa has done very well.
113
00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:02,545
Thank you, Santa.
114
00:05:02,569 --> 00:05:03,913
Well, you're welcome, honey.
115
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,581
There you go. Merry Christmas.
116
00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:07,597
Bush in '88.
117
00:05:12,179 --> 00:05:13,890
Okay, who's next? How
are you this Christmas?
118
00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:15,324
I'm not talking to any elf.
119
00:05:15,348 --> 00:05:16,659
I want the big guy.
120
00:05:16,683 --> 00:05:19,428
Now, Eddie... be nice.
121
00:05:19,452 --> 00:05:20,763
I'm always nice!
122
00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:24,224
Hey, Kringle, let's get
this show on the road.
123
00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:29,438
Okay, Eddie.
124
00:05:29,462 --> 00:05:31,040
Come here. There you go.
125
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,109
Okay, just sit right here
126
00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,778
and tell me what you
want for Christmas.
127
00:05:35,802 --> 00:05:37,213
Okay, Santa, here
we go. I want...
128
00:05:37,237 --> 00:05:39,882
Whoa, whoa, hold it, hold
it, hold it, hold it, hold it...
129
00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:41,517
Uh...
130
00:05:41,541 --> 00:05:43,319
Okay, shoot.
131
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:46,055
Okay, Santa, I want a
fire truck, a baseball mitt,
132
00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:49,225
a train set, a robot, a
bicycle, a record player...
133
00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:51,994
No, make that a CD... a
personal computer, a basketball,
134
00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:53,262
an apartment in Manhattan...
135
00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:56,833
Hey, wait a minute!
I'm not done yet!
136
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,801
Listen, kid, you don't
need a Santa Claus,
137
00:05:58,825 --> 00:06:00,937
you need a business manager.
138
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:04,955
Okay, Merry Christmas and
good luck in the fiscal new year.
139
00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:10,546
I found that entire
exchange heartwarming.
140
00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:12,815
Excuse me, Santa,
are you still open?
141
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:14,550
Ho, ho, ho!
142
00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:15,718
I hope your
daughter's interested
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00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:18,321
in the commodities market.
144
00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:21,924
Come on, honey, Santa
wants to talk to you.
145
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:23,826
Hi, honey. What's your name?
146
00:06:23,850 --> 00:06:26,295
Michelle Davies.
147
00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,364
Okay, well, what do
you want for Christmas?
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00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,299
- Nothing.
- Oh, come on, honey.
149
00:06:30,323 --> 00:06:32,235
You can tell Santa
what you want.
150
00:06:32,259 --> 00:06:35,671
But, Mommy, I told you I
don't believe in Santa Claus.
151
00:06:35,695 --> 00:06:38,140
What?!
152
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:40,443
What?! You don't
believe in Santa Claus?
153
00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:41,711
Come here, come here.
154
00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:44,380
Let me tell you
something, Michelle.
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00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,316
I am definitely Santa Claus.
156
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:48,885
If you're Santa Claus,
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00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:52,346
why are there so many
Santa Clauses at other malls?
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00:06:57,984 --> 00:07:02,064
Well, uh, that's...
that's because, uh...
159
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,200
well, you see...
160
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:07,370
Elves, help me out on this.
161
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:09,572
Well, you... well, you
see, Santa is very busy...
162
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:12,174
Yeah, exactly! Exactly. Exactly.
163
00:07:12,198 --> 00:07:17,013
So, uh, uh, uh, I have some of
my elves, uh, dress up like me
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00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,814
to, uh, pick up the slack.
165
00:07:18,838 --> 00:07:20,816
It's-It's the same way
that President Reagan
166
00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:22,385
can't be everywhere, so, uh,
167
00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:24,887
so he sends his
assistants in his place.
168
00:07:24,911 --> 00:07:28,143
I don't believe in him, either.
169
00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:33,562
Come on, honey,
you can tell Santa.
170
00:07:33,586 --> 00:07:36,132
- What do you want for Christmas?
- My daddy.
171
00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:38,467
I want my daddy
home for Christmas.
172
00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:41,170
Sweetheart, you know
daddy can't come home
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00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:43,306
this year for Christmas.
174
00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:46,342
Can you get me my
daddy home for Christmas?
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00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:49,178
Um...
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00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:51,580
Uh, look, uh, Michelle...
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00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:54,083
I'm-I'm sorry, but
there are some things
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00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:56,385
that even Santa Claus can't do.
179
00:07:56,409 --> 00:07:58,721
You're not Santa Claus.
180
00:07:58,745 --> 00:08:00,389
Can we go now, Mommy?
181
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:05,194
Yeah. You want to take a
look at this pretty tree first, huh?
182
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:07,596
Look, look, I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
183
00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:10,733
I'm, uh... uh, usually
the kids love me.
184
00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,902
No, that's okay,
it's not your fault.
185
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:15,671
You're not the first
Santa she's done this to.
186
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:17,807
Oh. Oh, what is it?
It's the beard, right?
187
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,642
The-the... the suit?
188
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,510
My "Ho, ho, ho" s
getting on her nerves?
189
00:08:21,534 --> 00:08:25,181
I know they're getting on mine.
190
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:28,851
Um, no, you see, Michelle's
dad has to travel for business,
191
00:08:28,875 --> 00:08:31,253
and, uh, this year
hasn't been so great.
192
00:08:31,277 --> 00:08:33,689
So he's had to take
whatever he could get.
193
00:08:33,713 --> 00:08:36,092
Unfortunately, that
means he has to be away
194
00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:37,493
for Christmas this year.
195
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,695
That's too bad.
196
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,018
Well, um... thanks,
anyway, for trying.
197
00:08:43,723 --> 00:08:46,090
Hey, hon, you ready?
198
00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:50,239
I don't know. That
was heartbreaking.
199
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,141
The way she looked at me
200
00:08:52,165 --> 00:08:54,577
and said, "You're not Santa."
201
00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:57,480
Alex, you're not Santa.
202
00:08:57,504 --> 00:09:00,983
You don't have to
rub my nose in it.
203
00:09:01,007 --> 00:09:02,952
- Sorry.
- You're not an elf, either,
204
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,153
you know.
205
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:05,554
I know.
206
00:09:05,578 --> 00:09:08,791
Look, the point is... I
mean, I got the suit,
207
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:12,128
I've got the beard, I
mean, I-I-I-I look like Santa.
208
00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:14,530
I feel like it's my
responsibility to do something.
209
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:18,467
Well, why don't you get on a
sleigh and go to the North Pole?
210
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,136
Well, you know,
Alex, it's really great
211
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,470
that you have such
noble impulses.
212
00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:23,973
It'd be nice to see it
more than once a year.
213
00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:27,710
Please, Jennifer, let's
take all we can get.
214
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:28,878
I don't know what you're making
215
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:29,879
such a big deal about, Elyse!
216
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,547
A tree is a tree.
217
00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:35,633
Steven, a tree that fits in
your pocket is not a tree.
218
00:09:36,776 --> 00:09:39,769
I don't think it's so bad.
219
00:09:44,717 --> 00:09:46,962
I can imagine
the cry of "Timber"
220
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:48,716
when that baby came down.
221
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:51,600
Look, I know it's not perfect.
222
00:09:51,624 --> 00:09:54,003
Not perfect? Dad, this is
the first Christmas in history
223
00:09:54,027 --> 00:09:57,406
where the tree can
go under the presents.
224
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,774
Dad, can't you go to
225
00:09:58,798 --> 00:10:01,277
a regular Christmas tree
lot this year, just this once?
226
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:03,045
Oh, sure! Let's just patronize
227
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:06,649
one of those faceless,
impersonal, conformist lots.
228
00:10:06,673 --> 00:10:08,651
- Yeah.
- Where all the trees
229
00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:10,619
- are tall and healthy.
- Yeah.
230
00:10:10,643 --> 00:10:12,721
I suppose you'd like
one green and leafy, too.
231
00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:14,737
Oh, yes!
232
00:10:17,484 --> 00:10:19,462
We're ready to
hang our stockings.
233
00:10:19,486 --> 00:10:21,464
Oh, great! Let's go.
234
00:10:21,488 --> 00:10:23,599
- Hey, buddy.
- Here's mine.
235
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,134
Hey, baby.
236
00:10:25,158 --> 00:10:27,703
While you guys were out, we
made milk and cookies for Santa.
237
00:10:27,727 --> 00:10:28,904
Terrific. Where are they?
238
00:10:28,928 --> 00:10:31,407
In the stocking.
239
00:10:31,431 --> 00:10:33,008
What about yours, Alex?
240
00:10:33,032 --> 00:10:34,243
Oh, I don't know, Mom.
241
00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:36,112
I, uh... I don't feel
much like it this year.
242
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,647
Come on, Alex, it wouldn't be
Christmas without your stocking.
243
00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:41,317
All right. All right.
244
00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:44,334
There we go.
245
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,626
How was your first
day at the mall?
246
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,696
Will Christmas still be
celebrated this year?
247
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:54,830
Yeah, it was fine.
248
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:56,098
It was... it was fine.
249
00:10:56,122 --> 00:11:00,102
It was just... this,
um, this little girl.
250
00:11:00,126 --> 00:11:01,170
Michelle.
251
00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:04,206
Yeah. She's really
cute, but really sad.
252
00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:06,041
Oh, what's the problem
with this little girl?
253
00:11:06,065 --> 00:11:08,744
Well, her father works, and
can't be home for Christmas.
254
00:11:08,768 --> 00:11:09,945
She's seven years old
255
00:11:09,969 --> 00:11:12,047
and she doesn't even
believe in Santa Claus.
256
00:11:12,071 --> 00:11:14,150
It just seemed so wrong
257
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,700
to see someone
unhappy at the mall.
258
00:11:22,382 --> 00:11:24,908
I feel completely helpless...
259
00:11:26,452 --> 00:11:29,251
and I wish there was
something I could do.
260
00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,755
Hiya.
261
00:11:52,779 --> 00:11:55,524
Ho, ho, ho, ho!
262
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:58,541
Oh, great, a Method Santa.
263
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,865
How's Mrs. Claus?
264
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,900
Thank you for asking.
265
00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:06,402
Ho, ho, ho!
266
00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:08,237
Well, she has a few sniffles,
267
00:12:08,261 --> 00:12:09,438
but then, she's at home
268
00:12:09,462 --> 00:12:12,074
and the elves are
taking good care of her.
269
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:14,310
Let's try and keep our sled
in the real world here, pal,
270
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:16,735
all right?
271
00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:20,749
Actually, I don't use a sled.
272
00:12:20,773 --> 00:12:22,765
I use a sleigh.
273
00:12:23,843 --> 00:12:26,088
And, uh, something else...
274
00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:28,591
I would never use
buttons like that.
275
00:12:28,615 --> 00:12:31,360
And that belt...
Completely wrong.
276
00:12:31,384 --> 00:12:33,028
Where's your beard?
277
00:12:33,052 --> 00:12:34,763
It's in my locker.
278
00:12:34,787 --> 00:12:36,765
- Where'd you get yours, a garage sale?
- Ow!
279
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:39,535
- Ooh!
- Whoa! Hey. How come you got a good beard?
280
00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:41,136
Where do you
work, lawn furniture?
281
00:12:42,662 --> 00:12:45,307
No, I-I'm based up
at the North Pole.
282
00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:47,743
I-I'm down here
to do a little survey
283
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,895
to see what the
children would like.
284
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:52,929
Beam me up, Scotty.
285
00:12:57,343 --> 00:13:02,324
Well! That briefcase is
holding up rather well, isn't it?
286
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:04,994
- What?
- The briefcase.
287
00:13:05,018 --> 00:13:08,464
Uh, that was the
Christmas of '73.
288
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,267
Yeah, yeah, it's holding up f...
289
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,836
- H-How do you know that?
- I remember
290
00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:15,337
that year quite well.
291
00:13:15,361 --> 00:13:18,340
Let's see, you asked
for that briefcase,
292
00:13:18,364 --> 00:13:19,942
a pocket calculator,
293
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:22,526
and a pardon for Richard Nixon.
294
00:13:26,673 --> 00:13:28,350
You're good.
295
00:13:28,374 --> 00:13:29,652
That is good!
296
00:13:29,676 --> 00:13:33,122
Alex, uh, I know
that up to this point,
297
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,392
our relationship has
been mostly financial.
298
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:38,749
But this year you've changed.
299
00:13:40,019 --> 00:13:41,930
Michelle has really touched you.
300
00:13:41,954 --> 00:13:43,855
And that's why I'm here.
301
00:13:44,891 --> 00:13:46,869
I'm on Candid Camera, right?
302
00:13:46,893 --> 00:13:48,971
I am. I am. Come
on, where is he?
303
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,140
Where is he? Where
is he? Come on.
304
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,641
Come... Hey, Allen Funt!
305
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,843
I'm on to you! Come on, buddy!
306
00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:57,446
- Wh-Where... It's in the pads, right?
- Oh, ho, ho!
307
00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:59,748
Don't do that. It
tickles, Alex! Ho, ho!
308
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:03,209
And you know it's like a
bowl of jelly... ho, ho, ho!
309
00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:07,056
Wait a minute. Okay.
310
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,791
Look, this has got
to stop, all right?
311
00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:11,060
Uh, what are you... what
are you trying to tell me,
312
00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:12,194
that you are Santa Claus?
313
00:14:12,218 --> 00:14:14,196
I'm-I'm really very happy
314
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:16,465
that you decided
to play me this year.
315
00:14:16,489 --> 00:14:18,467
I-I know that you're
a little depressed
316
00:14:18,491 --> 00:14:21,188
because you haven't
been able to help Michelle.
317
00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:25,040
But you're doing
the right thing.
318
00:14:25,064 --> 00:14:28,977
Don't underestimate
the power of Christmas.
319
00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:30,979
It can work miracles.
320
00:14:31,003 --> 00:14:33,482
Look, I-I... I don't
know what to do.
321
00:14:33,506 --> 00:14:36,085
I mean, I-I don't know
how to help Michelle.
322
00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:38,821
Trust your heart, Alex.
323
00:14:38,845 --> 00:14:40,656
My heart.
324
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:44,126
I haven't used it in so long.
325
00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:46,695
I wouldn't say that.
326
00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:49,398
You're using it right now.
327
00:14:49,422 --> 00:14:51,333
Just keep at it.
328
00:14:51,357 --> 00:14:52,901
And don't forget...
329
00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:56,521
Good thoughts and good
deeds don't go unrewarded.
330
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,478
Alex, uh...
331
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:04,880
I really would like to help.
332
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,316
But I don't see any chance
333
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:09,832
of bringing you that
Porsche this year.
334
00:15:18,518 --> 00:15:20,510
But I've been so good!
335
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:29,171
Santa!
336
00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:30,305
Santa, where you been?
337
00:15:30,329 --> 00:15:32,141
All the kids are waiting.
338
00:15:32,165 --> 00:15:34,810
I just met the most
incredible guy.
339
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:36,779
- What?
- I ju... I just...
340
00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:38,781
I just met Santa Claus.
341
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:40,182
Boy, Alex,
342
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:42,251
this-this trying to show
good will towards men
343
00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,853
has put you under
quite a strain, hasn't it?
344
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:46,622
Maybe you want
to lie down, Alex.
345
00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:48,457
- Jennifer and I can take care of this.
- No, no, no.
346
00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:49,992
No, I can't lie down.
I can't lie down.
347
00:15:50,016 --> 00:15:52,628
I'm too excited. Do you
realize that it is Christmas?
348
00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:54,644
No, we're dressed
like this all the time.
349
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:57,633
Hey! Let's go, pal.
350
00:15:57,657 --> 00:15:58,767
Let's get a move on.
351
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,350
Easter's almost here!
352
00:16:01,828 --> 00:16:03,839
Come here, Eddie.
353
00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:05,541
Don't lay a hand on me.
354
00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:07,500
Jacoby & Meyers is
right across the mall.
355
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:13,682
Eddie, come here.
356
00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:15,197
Sit down.
357
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,187
Eddie...
358
00:16:18,211 --> 00:16:20,122
what does Christmas mean to you?
359
00:16:20,146 --> 00:16:22,424
It means getting presents!
360
00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:23,759
All right. Okay.
361
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:26,295
What if you had all the
presents in the world
362
00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:28,897
and nobody to share them with?
363
00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,913
That would be great!
364
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:34,803
I mean... I mean, if your mom...
365
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:38,307
wasn't there t-to watch
you open those presents
366
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:40,976
and you didn't have any
friends to show those presents to,
367
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,678
and people weren't
around caroling
368
00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:45,080
and spreading good cheer,
369
00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:47,749
would you really
enjoy those presents?
370
00:16:47,773 --> 00:16:51,253
I guess I wouldn't be so
happy without all those people.
371
00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:52,688
That's right. That's right.
372
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,356
'Cause the important
thing about Christmas
373
00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:55,958
isn't the presents, Eddie.
374
00:16:55,982 --> 00:16:58,360
It's being with the
people that you love.
375
00:16:58,384 --> 00:17:00,148
Thanks, Santa.
376
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,365
Mom, let's find another Santa.
377
00:17:03,389 --> 00:17:05,881
This guy's bringing me down.
378
00:17:10,763 --> 00:17:13,242
Alex.
379
00:17:13,266 --> 00:17:15,777
Alex, that...
380
00:17:15,801 --> 00:17:17,779
that was very sensitive, Alex.
381
00:17:17,803 --> 00:17:19,515
Are you feeling feverish?
382
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,517
I... I don't know.
383
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,752
I don't know, I just... I
feel very Christmassy.
384
00:17:23,776 --> 00:17:25,721
I j... I feel like...
385
00:17:25,745 --> 00:17:27,789
♪ Deck the halls
with boughs of holly ♪
386
00:17:27,813 --> 00:17:30,192
♪ Fa, la-la, la-la,
la-la, la, la... ♪
387
00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:33,095
- Shh.
- I-I can't help it. I just...
388
00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:37,065
♪ God rest ye merry gentlemen,
let nothing you dismay... ♪
389
00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:39,568
I don't know what it
is. I can't stop singing!
390
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:41,370
♪ Hello, Dolly ♪
391
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,672
♪ Well, hello, Dolly ♪
392
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:46,408
♪ It's so nice to have you... ♪
393
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,810
Michelle!
394
00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:51,380
Michelle! Hi. Hi, remember me?
395
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,815
With that suit,
it's hard to forget.
396
00:17:53,839 --> 00:17:56,351
Listen, Michelle,
I've got to own up.
397
00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:57,986
I'm-I'm not Santa Claus.
398
00:17:58,010 --> 00:18:00,155
I'm-I'm Alex Keaton.
399
00:18:00,179 --> 00:18:03,525
But I want you to know
that there is a Santa Claus.
400
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:06,361
And-and he really
cares about you.
401
00:18:06,385 --> 00:18:08,430
Um, Michelle, you
didn't get a candy cane
402
00:18:08,454 --> 00:18:09,865
last time you were here.
403
00:18:09,889 --> 00:18:11,733
Why don't you come over
here and pick one out? Come on.
404
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:15,070
- That's a good idea, huh?
- Listen, um, I, uh...
405
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:18,507
I hope I'm not out of
line here, but, um...
406
00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:22,844
I've... I-I've been really
concerned about your daughter.
407
00:18:22,868 --> 00:18:25,514
I don't... hey, I don't know,
it comes with the suit...
408
00:18:25,538 --> 00:18:27,149
but, um, I was just wondering,
409
00:18:27,173 --> 00:18:29,151
have you heard anything
from your husband?
410
00:18:29,175 --> 00:18:31,219
Uh, yeah, I talked
to him yesterday,
411
00:18:31,243 --> 00:18:33,822
and he's, uh, definitely not
gonna be able to make it home
412
00:18:33,846 --> 00:18:35,357
for Christmas tomorrow.
413
00:18:35,381 --> 00:18:37,359
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm
sorry. But, um...
414
00:18:37,383 --> 00:18:39,261
if-if you and Michelle
aren't doing anything tonight,
415
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:41,730
I was wondering if you'd like
to come over to our house.
416
00:18:41,754 --> 00:18:43,198
I mean, our family
usually has a...
417
00:18:43,222 --> 00:18:44,866
a party every Christmas Eve,
418
00:18:44,890 --> 00:18:47,035
and I know they'd
love to meet you.
419
00:18:47,059 --> 00:18:49,705
And I... I have a feeling
420
00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:52,722
that this is gonna be a
very special Christmas.
421
00:18:57,903 --> 00:18:59,881
Hey...
422
00:18:59,905 --> 00:19:02,417
So!
423
00:19:02,441 --> 00:19:04,433
Another carol, anyone?
424
00:19:05,911 --> 00:19:08,290
Sure. We should sing a hymn
425
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:12,251
to this beautiful tree
Mr. Krewson brought us.
426
00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:16,865
♪ O cactus tree, O cactus tree ♪
427
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,700
♪ Thou art so... ♪
428
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:20,716
♪ Fair and prickly. ♪
429
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:24,640
I can't believe it.
430
00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:27,175
All right, come on, let's
look on the bright side.
431
00:19:27,199 --> 00:19:28,343
Which is?
432
00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:29,845
Nick...?
433
00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:33,882
Well, uh, it's Christmas with
kind of a Wild West theme, huh?
434
00:19:33,906 --> 00:19:35,384
Yeah.
435
00:19:35,408 --> 00:19:37,052
Well, I think it's appropriate.
436
00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:40,455
I-I mean, you probably
don't get much rain in here.
437
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,458
Look... I spoke to Mr. Krewson.
438
00:19:43,482 --> 00:19:46,695
He promised we'd have a
great tree here by tonight.
439
00:19:46,719 --> 00:19:48,187
I trust him.
440
00:19:49,221 --> 00:19:50,365
You're right. Y...
441
00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:51,967
It's-it's Christmas.
442
00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:54,102
The tree isn't important, it...
443
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:57,272
What is, is that we're all
together for the holiday.
444
00:19:57,296 --> 00:19:59,341
We can have a great Christmas
445
00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:01,276
with the worst
tree in the world!
446
00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:04,680
We've done it for
the last three years.
447
00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:07,697
Excuse me.
448
00:20:08,808 --> 00:20:12,554
Oh, hi, Skippy.
449
00:20:12,578 --> 00:20:14,222
How'd you know it was me?
450
00:20:14,246 --> 00:20:17,239
Most Abominable Snowmen
wear contact lenses.
451
00:20:20,086 --> 00:20:21,463
Don't be scared, Andy.
452
00:20:21,487 --> 00:20:23,398
It's just me, Skippy.
453
00:20:23,422 --> 00:20:25,414
Thanks. I was terrified.
454
00:20:26,525 --> 00:20:28,537
It's almost time for bed, honey.
455
00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:30,605
I want to stay up and
wait for Santa Claus.
456
00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:31,707
Oh, hey, hey, hey.
457
00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:33,141
I-I'll wait up with you, Andy.
458
00:20:33,165 --> 00:20:35,677
You know, every year,
I try to wait up for him,
459
00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:37,579
and, uh, every
year I fall asleep.
460
00:20:37,603 --> 00:20:39,581
You know, I have
the same problem.
461
00:20:39,605 --> 00:20:41,917
What do you say we put
on a pot of black coffee?
462
00:20:41,941 --> 00:20:43,000
All right.
463
00:20:45,544 --> 00:20:47,022
There they go,
464
00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:49,038
the three wise men.
465
00:20:50,382 --> 00:20:51,993
Hey... folks?
466
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:53,795
Uh, I'd like you to meet
some friends of mine.
467
00:20:53,819 --> 00:20:56,064
Um, this is Beth
and Michelle Davies.
468
00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:57,799
- Hi. How are you?
- Nice to meet you.
469
00:20:57,823 --> 00:21:00,202
What's with the cactus?
470
00:21:00,226 --> 00:21:01,403
Michelle,
471
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:02,904
that's not polite.
472
00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:05,273
What is with the cactus?
473
00:21:05,297 --> 00:21:07,709
- Hi.
- Hi.
474
00:21:07,733 --> 00:21:09,711
Want to hang your stocking up?
475
00:21:09,735 --> 00:21:11,179
I don't have one.
476
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:14,799
You can use mine. It already
has milk and cookies in it.
477
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:16,952
Please, have a seat.
478
00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:17,953
Yes,
479
00:21:17,977 --> 00:21:18,954
make yourself at home.
480
00:21:18,978 --> 00:21:20,241
I'll just... Excuse me.
481
00:21:21,847 --> 00:21:23,191
Hey, Mr. Krewson!
482
00:21:23,215 --> 00:21:24,693
- Oh, Mr. Keaton!
- Hi.
483
00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:26,361
- Merry Christ... Merry Christmas!
- Hi.
484
00:21:26,385 --> 00:21:29,030
I've been thinking about your
little, uh, tree problem here,
485
00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:30,332
and, uh, well...
486
00:21:30,356 --> 00:21:32,501
I have a surprise for you! Yeah!
487
00:21:32,525 --> 00:21:34,836
Oh, Mr. Krewson!
488
00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:37,105
It's beautiful! Love this tree!
489
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:37,907
Oh, it's beautiful!
490
00:21:37,931 --> 00:21:41,777
Beautiful tree, Mister...
491
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,845
Oh, this is such
a beautiful tree.
492
00:21:43,869 --> 00:21:46,081
Now it feels like Christmas now.
493
00:21:46,105 --> 00:21:48,097
And to complete the mood...
494
00:21:58,384 --> 00:22:01,863
♪ My advice to add some spice ♪
495
00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:05,200
♪ And live in harmony ♪
496
00:22:05,224 --> 00:22:07,202
♪ Add a pinch of love ♪
497
00:22:07,226 --> 00:22:11,773
♪ And a dash of Christmas Eve ♪
498
00:22:11,797 --> 00:22:14,075
- Are you having a good time, Michelle?
- Uh-huh.
499
00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:16,711
Andy and I are getting married.
500
00:22:18,037 --> 00:22:20,215
Listen, Michelle, thanks
for coming to our party.
501
00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:22,117
You helped make
it a great Christmas.
502
00:22:22,141 --> 00:22:23,985
Thanks, Alex.
503
00:22:24,009 --> 00:22:26,001
I'll get it.
504
00:22:27,780 --> 00:22:29,257
Hello. May I help you?
505
00:22:29,281 --> 00:22:31,259
Yes, I'm looking
for Alex P. Keaton.
506
00:22:31,283 --> 00:22:32,260
Alex, honey.
507
00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:34,196
Yeah.
508
00:22:34,220 --> 00:22:35,931
- Hi, I'm Alex.
- Hello.
509
00:22:35,955 --> 00:22:37,098
My name is Ray Davies.
510
00:22:37,122 --> 00:22:38,300
Daddy!
511
00:22:38,324 --> 00:22:39,768
Michelle!
512
00:22:39,792 --> 00:22:42,270
Ray? Wha...
513
00:22:42,294 --> 00:22:44,072
- Wha...
- Honey!
514
00:22:44,096 --> 00:22:45,574
I don't believe this.
515
00:22:45,598 --> 00:22:47,042
What are you doing here?
516
00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:48,710
Uh, well, we met Alex, and...
517
00:22:48,734 --> 00:22:51,179
Never mind that; what
are you doing here?
518
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,747
Well, I was in Fargo.
519
00:22:52,771 --> 00:22:54,015
It was a horrible night.
520
00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:55,217
I didn't make a single sale.
521
00:22:55,241 --> 00:22:56,918
I was on my way
back to the motel
522
00:22:56,942 --> 00:22:58,420
so I could give you guys a call.
523
00:22:58,444 --> 00:23:00,055
When I got there,
standing at my door
524
00:23:00,079 --> 00:23:02,324
was this great big
barrel of a man...
525
00:23:02,348 --> 00:23:03,592
with a white beard.
526
00:23:03,616 --> 00:23:06,361
And the most amazing
thing happened... he said
527
00:23:06,385 --> 00:23:09,364
he wanted to buy absolutely
everything I had to sell.
528
00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:11,032
That's incredible, honey!
529
00:23:11,056 --> 00:23:13,235
I'm so proud of you!
530
00:23:13,259 --> 00:23:14,569
He handed me the money,
531
00:23:14,593 --> 00:23:16,071
and the only thing
he asked me to do
532
00:23:16,095 --> 00:23:18,673
was deliver this package
to Alex P. Keaton.
533
00:23:18,697 --> 00:23:21,843
Thanks.
534
00:23:21,867 --> 00:23:24,346
This is the best Christmas
present in the world.
535
00:23:24,370 --> 00:23:26,948
- What do you make of this?
- Oh, uh, uh, I don't know.
536
00:23:26,972 --> 00:23:29,965
I'm still in shock from
having a decent tree.
537
00:23:34,113 --> 00:23:35,891
Who's that from, Alex?
538
00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:37,759
A... friend. A friend.
539
00:23:37,783 --> 00:23:39,527
"Alex, if you're pure of heart,
540
00:23:39,551 --> 00:23:42,197
this should be as
good as the real thing."
541
00:23:42,221 --> 00:23:43,331
Hey, it's him!
542
00:23:43,355 --> 00:23:45,333
- It's him!
- It really is!
543
00:23:45,357 --> 00:23:46,568
It's Santa Claus!
544
00:23:46,592 --> 00:23:49,838
Ho, ho, ho, ho!
545
00:23:49,862 --> 00:23:54,276
Merry Christmas!
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
546
00:23:58,837 --> 00:24:02,484
♪ Add just a pinch of love ♪
547
00:24:02,508 --> 00:24:06,502
♪ And a dash of Christmas Eve. ♪
548
00:24:35,841 --> 00:24:37,652
Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
37196
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