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♪♪
2
00:00:13,380 --> 00:00:18,785
♪ I bet we've been
together for a million years ♪
3
00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:24,449
♪ And I bet we'll be
together for a million more ♪
4
00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:26,992
♪ Oh, it's like I
started breathing ♪
5
00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:29,790
♪ On the night we kissed ♪
6
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:35,028
♪ And I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪
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00:00:35,168 --> 00:00:40,766
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
8
00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:46,040
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
9
00:00:46,179 --> 00:00:52,312
♪ And there ain't no nothing we
can't love each other through ♪
10
00:00:52,452 --> 00:00:57,516
♪ What would we do,
baby, without us? ♪
11
00:00:57,658 --> 00:01:00,457
♪ Sha-la-la-la. ♪
12
00:01:04,932 --> 00:01:06,764
Hey, Andy and I are
going out for a walk.
13
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,129
You want to come, Jen?
14
00:01:08,268 --> 00:01:09,879
Oh, no, thanks, Dad.
I've got this paper to write,
15
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:11,371
and it's going kind of slow.
16
00:01:11,505 --> 00:01:12,803
Oh, maybe I could help.
17
00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:14,568
I don't think so, Dad.
18
00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:16,802
I see. You think that
now you're in high school
19
00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:18,655
your homework's
getting a little too complex
20
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:20,841
for your old, intellectually
washed-up dad.
21
00:01:22,449 --> 00:01:24,918
Well, it's just that you
go completely overboard
22
00:01:25,052 --> 00:01:26,247
in these situations.
23
00:01:26,386 --> 00:01:28,106
It's like the time when
you tried to help me
24
00:01:28,221 --> 00:01:29,621
with that book
report on Huck Finn,
25
00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:32,749
and we had to write it on a raft
floating down the Mississippi.
26
00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:35,893
Well, what's so
terrible about a parent
27
00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:38,157
trying to get involved with
his children's education?
28
00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:40,426
After all, I help Andy
with his homework.
29
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:43,560
I always redo it
after you leave.
30
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:47,603
Jen, I'll tell you what.
31
00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:49,471
I'll only help you
if your paper's
32
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,272
in an area of my expertise.
33
00:01:52,346 --> 00:01:54,076
All right, Dad.
I'm writing a paper
34
00:01:54,214 --> 00:01:56,183
for my introduction
to philosophy class
35
00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:57,807
on the existentialist
perspective
36
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,283
of Søren Kierkegaard.
37
00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:05,051
Søren Kierkegaard?
38
00:02:05,192 --> 00:02:07,855
Sørie?
39
00:02:07,995 --> 00:02:09,623
Who's Kierkegaard?
40
00:02:09,763 --> 00:02:11,959
He was a Swedish
philosopher, Andy.
41
00:02:12,099 --> 00:02:14,500
He was a Danish
philosopher, Dad.
42
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:16,501
T-Technically he was Danish.
43
00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:18,629
But he had an
apartment in Sweden.
44
00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:23,319
Lauren, Lauren, come on,
come on, let me take that.
45
00:02:23,343 --> 00:02:24,902
Alex, it's one
bag. I can carry it.
46
00:02:25,045 --> 00:02:26,445
Hey, listen, the woman I love
47
00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:29,277
is not gonna be lugging
around a heavy grocery bag.
48
00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,011
Yo, Alex!
49
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:34,417
Sorry, sorry. Forgot
you were out there.
50
00:02:34,554 --> 00:02:35,817
It's all right.
51
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:38,050
I'm used to it. The minute
we walked into the market,
52
00:02:38,191 --> 00:02:39,671
I knew you two were
in your own world.
53
00:02:39,793 --> 00:02:41,261
Lauren, I still
can't believe it.
54
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:44,263
After three months of going
out, you still seem to like Alex.
55
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:47,266
Have you ever taken a
really good look at him?
56
00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:49,393
Oh, my God!
57
00:02:49,536 --> 00:02:50,560
You're right.
58
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:51,728
Hey, hey.
59
00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:53,067
Of course she likes me.
60
00:02:53,206 --> 00:02:55,072
I'm cute, I'm intelligent,
61
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:58,201
and I have unlimited
earning potential.
62
00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:01,338
I know that's what
attracted me to you.
63
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:03,783
I think you guys
make a cute couple.
64
00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:05,852
I just never want to go
shopping with you again.
65
00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:08,455
Oh, I've got it!
66
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:10,454
Hello.
67
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:12,957
Um, yeah. Yes.
68
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:14,459
Hold on a second.
69
00:03:14,594 --> 00:03:16,995
- Uh, Lauren, it's for you.
- For me?
70
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:19,895
I thought from the ring
it would be for me, but...
71
00:03:24,504 --> 00:03:26,370
Hello.
72
00:03:26,506 --> 00:03:28,372
Eric, what a surprise!
73
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:30,534
How'd you get the number here?
74
00:03:30,677 --> 00:03:32,111
Oh, I see.
75
00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:34,612
Oh, I'm fine, fine.
How are you doing?
76
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:36,740
Oh, that's great!
77
00:03:38,185 --> 00:03:41,053
Yeah, well, I don't know. Um...
78
00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:43,214
Yeah, I'll have
to think about it.
79
00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:45,052
Yeah, I will.
80
00:03:45,192 --> 00:03:46,717
Good hearing from you, too.
81
00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:48,852
Bye-bye.
82
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,335
That was Eric Matthews.
83
00:03:55,469 --> 00:03:57,904
Uh, Eric Matthews. Why
does that name sound familiar?
84
00:03:58,038 --> 00:04:00,269
He's the guy that I went
out with before I met you.
85
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:03,377
Yeah, that's it.
86
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:05,388
Well, he's coming in from
New York tomorrow night,
87
00:04:05,412 --> 00:04:07,438
and he wants to
know about dinner.
88
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:11,143
Oh, well, geez, uh, I'm
busy tomorrow night.
89
00:04:12,185 --> 00:04:13,813
I think he meant me.
90
00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:15,047
Oh, of course. Oh, you!
91
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:16,781
Oh, you-you should go.
92
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,323
Are you sure it
wouldn't bother you?
93
00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:20,691
No! No, absolu... Look,
he's come all this way.
94
00:04:20,827 --> 00:04:23,194
You know, uh, I think it
would be a nice gesture.
95
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,923
Alex, that's so
sensitive of you.
96
00:04:25,065 --> 00:04:27,225
I-I thought you'd be threatened
by something like this.
97
00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:28,460
Hey... What, are you kidding?
98
00:04:28,568 --> 00:04:30,328
Come on, you should
know me better than that.
99
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:33,305
Now, let's just put the rest
of this stuff away, okay?
100
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,432
We'll go in, we'll
have a nice dinner.
101
00:04:35,575 --> 00:04:37,567
Afterwards, we'll get married.
102
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:40,806
Alex, sit down.
103
00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:42,108
I'll make you some tea.
104
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:43,615
Oh, uh, no, listen.
105
00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:45,595
Uh, uh, I'm going to get
going 'cause I don't want
106
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,130
to be here when, uh...
when Eric gets here.
107
00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:49,065
Alex, you don't have to leave
just 'cause Eric's showing up.
108
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:50,089
Well, I know.
109
00:04:50,190 --> 00:04:51,351
I know, but, uh, you two
110
00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:52,969
probably have a lot
of catching up to do.
111
00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:54,273
You know, I'd
just be in the way.
112
00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:56,091
So you go out and
have a nice dinner.
113
00:04:56,229 --> 00:04:58,721
You're n-not going to
go out like that, are you?
114
00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:00,993
You know, dressed up.
115
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,933
Alex, this is just a sweater.
116
00:05:04,070 --> 00:05:06,630
I know. I know. It's just...
it's just such a fancy one.
117
00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:07,968
I mean...
118
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:09,719
I mean, you're just
going out for dinner, right?
119
00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:13,009
You're not going to meet
the queen afterwards.
120
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:15,843
Alex, if you're nervous
about this, I'll call it off.
121
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,917
No, I-I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
122
00:05:18,051 --> 00:05:18,916
Okay, you sure?
123
00:05:19,052 --> 00:05:20,714
- Positive.
- All right.
124
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:22,049
Okay.
125
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:27,358
Eric.
126
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,258
Lauren.
127
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,798
Oh, you look terrific.
128
00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:36,445
Your hair's a little
shorter. I like it.
129
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:37,469
Oh, thank you.
130
00:05:37,537 --> 00:05:38,698
You look terrific, too.
131
00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,034
Your hair's a little longer.
132
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,039
Well, thanks. Nice
of you to notice.
133
00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:44,644
Mine's exactly the same.
134
00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:48,581
I'm sorry.
135
00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:50,193
Eric, I'd like you to
meet Alex Keaton.
136
00:05:50,217 --> 00:05:51,327
It's a pleasure
meeting you, Alex.
137
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,217
Yeah, pleasure
meeting you, too, Eric.
138
00:05:55,989 --> 00:05:57,924
You're a little early.
139
00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,535
I wasn't expecting
you for another hour.
140
00:05:59,559 --> 00:06:00,559
Oh, you know me.
141
00:06:00,627 --> 00:06:01,667
I'm always a little early.
142
00:06:01,761 --> 00:06:02,761
Can't help it.
143
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:04,273
I think it's important
to be punctual.
144
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:05,697
Don't have to tell me.
145
00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:09,064
I'm, uh... I'm...
146
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,434
I'm here for a date next week.
147
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,120
Why don't I call the restaurant
148
00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:19,488
and see if they
can take us earlier?
149
00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:20,857
- Good idea.
- Okay. I'll be right back.
150
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:22,873
Right.
151
00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:29,051
So you and Lauren
met over at Leland.
152
00:06:29,189 --> 00:06:30,316
Uh, yeah.
153
00:06:30,457 --> 00:06:31,652
Yeah, that's right.
154
00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:34,090
She was, uh... she was
doing a psychology experiment
155
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,787
on, uh, overachievers,
so I applied.
156
00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:39,695
I'm in the economics
department myself.
157
00:06:39,833 --> 00:06:41,631
My old stomping grounds.
158
00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:43,703
How's Professor Carpenter doing?
159
00:06:43,837 --> 00:06:46,068
Great. I had him for
micro this past semester.
160
00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:47,446
He's a tough old guy, isn't he?
161
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:48,600
Ooh, you bet. I was, uh...
162
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:51,075
I was lucky to squeeze
a B-plus out of him.
163
00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:52,338
I mean, I deserved more,
164
00:06:52,479 --> 00:06:53,879
but-but-but he's
got this crazy rule
165
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,610
against giving A's.
166
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:56,808
Really?
167
00:06:56,950 --> 00:07:00,682
He must have started
that rule after I left.
168
00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,982
He, uh... he-he gave you an A?
169
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:05,115
A-plus.
170
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:10,825
Well, well, he ma...
171
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:12,660
he made up for the
low grade, actually.
172
00:07:12,799 --> 00:07:14,710
He, uh... he recommended
me for the Wilson scholarship.
173
00:07:14,734 --> 00:07:15,758
Oh, congratulations.
174
00:07:15,902 --> 00:07:17,165
I won that, too.
175
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:18,772
Well, I-I, uh...
176
00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:20,897
I also won the Burke scholarship
177
00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:24,341
and the Harrison scholarship,
the Matthews scholarship.
178
00:07:24,477 --> 00:07:27,379
I received all those
except the Matthews.
179
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:30,973
Oh, well, can't win them all.
180
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,117
Especially not that one.
181
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:34,177
It's named after me.
182
00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:47,157
Did I mention my
miniature golf trophy?
183
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:51,161
Look, uh, Alex...
184
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:58,275
It's sort of pointless
for us to sit here
185
00:07:58,411 --> 00:07:59,531
comparing grades and awards.
186
00:07:59,612 --> 00:08:02,605
I mean, we might as well
just exchange résumés.
187
00:08:04,718 --> 00:08:07,654
Right, right.
188
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,355
This is amazing.
189
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,796
This is incredible.
190
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:21,844
I-I mean, Lauren-Lauren told
me you worked on Wall Street.
191
00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:23,632
I had no idea it was
at Dunn and Bradley.
192
00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:24,999
Dunn and Bradley.
193
00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:26,716
That-that's the most prestigious
banking investment firm
194
00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:27,764
in the world.
195
00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:29,705
Isn't it?
196
00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:31,175
What is it like to work there?
197
00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:33,041
Oh, it's so magical.
198
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,511
It's hard to describe.
199
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:37,242
You know that feeling you
had when you were a kid
200
00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:39,250
and your parents would
take you to the bank?
201
00:08:39,386 --> 00:08:42,379
You'd dream about getting
naked and leaping into the vault?
202
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,583
Know it?
203
00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:48,593
I actually did it.
204
00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:49,728
The only downside is
205
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,024
that there's not much time
206
00:08:51,164 --> 00:08:52,393
for a personal life.
207
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,092
And even with all the
success and all the money,
208
00:08:55,235 --> 00:08:57,363
when I get home to
my empty apartment,
209
00:08:57,504 --> 00:09:01,305
I feel like there's something
missing from my life.
210
00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:06,478
Maybe you need a dog.
211
00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:08,712
Okay, ready to go?
212
00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:10,009
- Yeah, okay.
- Okay.
213
00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:11,230
Oh, I'm sorry.
214
00:09:11,317 --> 00:09:12,317
You meant you two.
215
00:09:12,452 --> 00:09:13,920
Okay, well, uh,
216
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,580
I'll meet you outside
when you're ready.
217
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,749
I'm across the street
in the black Porsche.
218
00:09:21,428 --> 00:09:22,428
Nice meeting you.
219
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,361
Nice meeting you, Eric.
220
00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:27,490
He's got a Porsche.
221
00:09:28,868 --> 00:09:30,131
Hey, do you guys have a minute?
222
00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:31,761
I need your help on something.
223
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,716
- Yeah. What's up?
- Well, I-I've been up in my room
224
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:37,677
trying to figure out what
is attractive about me.
225
00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:41,179
So far, a normal evening.
226
00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:43,783
Anyway, I've-I've come
up with a... with a partial list
227
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,681
of-of some of my good points,
228
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,811
and, uh...
229
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,950
Now, here's where
I need your help.
230
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:54,357
Carrying the list?
231
00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:56,156
No, no, no, no, I
mean, uh, filling it in.
232
00:09:56,296 --> 00:09:58,107
Rounding it out. You know,
making sure I haven't...
233
00:09:58,131 --> 00:09:59,326
haven't forgotten anything.
234
00:09:59,466 --> 00:10:02,561
I, uh... I think it's fun
for the whole family.
235
00:10:02,702 --> 00:10:05,763
Wait a minute, Alex,
you... you have a list here
236
00:10:05,905 --> 00:10:08,534
of your good points
and Eric's good points.
237
00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:11,110
Who's Eric?
238
00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:14,237
Uh, my imaginary friend.
239
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:20,051
Uh, your imaginary
friend has a Porsche?
240
00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:22,246
It's an imaginary Porsche.
241
00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:25,256
He also has a
job on Wall Street,
242
00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:27,155
an apartment in Manhattan,
243
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:30,058
and he went out
with Lauren for a year.
244
00:10:30,196 --> 00:10:31,391
Well, that's how we met.
245
00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,796
Uh... uh, Lauren introduced us
246
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:37,267
at a... at a... an
imaginary, uh,
247
00:10:37,403 --> 00:10:40,862
real person, uh, get-together.
248
00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,235
Which group were you with?
249
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,313
All right, Eric is, uh...
Eric's Lauren's old boyfriend.
250
00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:54,887
He's back in town,
and they went out
251
00:10:55,021 --> 00:10:56,021
for dinner tonight.
252
00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,652
You let them go?
253
00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:03,295
I let them go.
254
00:11:03,429 --> 00:11:04,897
What's so amazing about that?
255
00:11:05,031 --> 00:11:07,500
Well, I just know that
I'd be very nervous
256
00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:10,695
if one of Nick's old
girlfriends came to visit him.
257
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:13,204
We'd all be nervous, Mal.
258
00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:14,932
It would mean there
had been a break-out
259
00:11:15,074 --> 00:11:17,066
at the women's detention center.
260
00:11:21,648 --> 00:11:24,140
Uh, did you meet, uh, Eric?
261
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:25,728
Uh, briefly, briefly. We,
uh... we exchanged résumés.
262
00:11:25,752 --> 00:11:26,752
Ah.
263
00:11:26,886 --> 00:11:29,617
I guess a handshake
seemed too obvious.
264
00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:32,419
I'm telling you, Dad,
this guy is impressive.
265
00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:35,028
It's the first time I've ever
been in a room with someone
266
00:11:35,161 --> 00:11:38,131
that I didn't feel complete
intellectual superiority over.
267
00:11:38,264 --> 00:11:40,130
Thanks very much.
268
00:11:40,266 --> 00:11:42,132
Mom, you know what I mean.
269
00:11:42,268 --> 00:11:45,397
I mean, this guy, when
you compare our résumés,
270
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:48,064
he tops me in every category.
271
00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,074
Alex,
272
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:53,237
you have something
that Eric doesn't have.
273
00:11:53,379 --> 00:11:55,405
Lauren's love.
274
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,847
That's not something that
can be put on a résumé.
275
00:11:57,984 --> 00:12:00,977
No, Dad, he's got
that down here.
276
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:08,327
I-I must be missing something.
277
00:12:08,461 --> 00:12:10,341
There-there must be
some good points that I have
278
00:12:10,430 --> 00:12:11,430
that Eric doesn't have.
279
00:12:11,531 --> 00:12:13,329
So that's why I need
your help, okay?
280
00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:17,699
I-I-I want to know what
you like about Alex Keaton.
281
00:12:19,606 --> 00:12:23,543
Huh? Who want... who
wants to get the ball rolling?
282
00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:25,668
- Uh...
- I...
283
00:12:25,812 --> 00:12:28,338
Well...
284
00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:30,313
- Mal? Mally? Huh?
- Huh?
285
00:12:31,784 --> 00:12:34,219
I-I don't know.
It's so hard, Alex.
286
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:36,482
Can I get back to you?
287
00:12:37,824 --> 00:12:39,190
Come on, you know?
288
00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:40,725
This is real
important to me now.
289
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:44,194
My-my whole relationship with
Lauren could be at stake here.
290
00:12:44,330 --> 00:12:47,858
All right, just
give me a minute.
291
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:51,502
Uh... you...
292
00:12:53,172 --> 00:12:57,109
Um... uh...
293
00:12:57,243 --> 00:13:00,111
Forget it, Mal. I don't
want you to hurt yourself.
294
00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:04,450
I don't know, Dad. I
have to disagree with you.
295
00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:05,984
Kierkegaard felt
that all knowledge
296
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,815
must be self-knowledge.
297
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,014
I think you're wrong, Jen.
298
00:13:10,156 --> 00:13:13,615
He was also concerned with
the larger societal problems.
299
00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:16,320
Dad, you're missing
the point completely.
300
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:18,829
Oh, am I?
301
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:21,901
Kierkegaard believed that
examining man's existence
302
00:13:22,035 --> 00:13:24,834
within a larger framework of
a societal historical dialectic
303
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:27,907
was an avoidance of subjective
knowledge so essential
304
00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:31,170
to comprehending any
type of spiritual truth.
305
00:13:35,048 --> 00:13:37,381
Jennifer, go to your room.
306
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:44,789
That's a great argument, Dad.
307
00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:47,223
What do you think Kierkegaard
would have said to that?
308
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:50,797
Who cares? He
didn't have any kids.
309
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,600
Alex.
310
00:13:54,734 --> 00:13:56,979
Hey, I thought you said you
were gonna turn in early tonight.
311
00:13:57,003 --> 00:13:58,232
Oh, yeah, I was, I was.
312
00:13:58,371 --> 00:14:00,363
Just, uh... just came
down to get a snack.
313
00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:02,304
You seem a little distracted.
314
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:04,070
Oh, no. No, no, I'm fine, fine.
315
00:14:04,210 --> 00:14:07,874
All right. Enjoy
your Brillo pad.
316
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:17,687
Hello. Hi, Stacey.
317
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:19,690
Yeah. Is Lauren back yet?
318
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:22,694
No.
319
00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:26,322
Yeah, yes, I know. I know
she went out with Eric.
320
00:14:26,466 --> 00:14:30,130
Yes, I know he has a Porsche.
321
00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:33,205
No message. No... no message.
322
00:14:38,978 --> 00:14:41,914
Hi. Yeah, Columbus...
Columbus Grill?
323
00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:44,540
Um, yeah, is the
Matthews party still there?
324
00:14:44,684 --> 00:14:48,416
I see. They left two hours ago?
325
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,546
Yes, I know he drives a Porsche.
326
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,467
Hey.
327
00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:10,642
Hey.
328
00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:13,804
Lauren.
329
00:15:13,946 --> 00:15:15,847
Sweetheart.
330
00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:18,508
Lauren.
331
00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:21,280
Hey, honey bear.
332
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,788
Sweetheart.
333
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,585
Hey, Lauren.
334
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:33,597
Alex, what are you doing here?
335
00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:36,567
What am I doing here?
What am I doing here?
336
00:15:36,702 --> 00:15:37,795
I live here, buddy.
337
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:38,937
No, you don't.
338
00:15:39,005 --> 00:15:41,236
No, I don't.
339
00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:45,936
But I live very nearby.
340
00:15:46,078 --> 00:15:47,774
What the hell are
you doing here?
341
00:15:47,914 --> 00:15:49,542
Look, Alex...
342
00:15:52,251 --> 00:15:54,329
I think I know what you're
thinking, and you're wrong.
343
00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:57,118
Oh, really, Eric? Well,
let me tell you something.
344
00:15:57,256 --> 00:16:00,522
I may not be one of your slick,
fast-talking, money-mongering,
345
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:03,095
underhanded Dunn
and Bradley friends...
346
00:16:03,229 --> 00:16:06,757
Although I hope
to be one one day...
347
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:08,561
But I am not that gullible.
348
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:09,964
Alex, listen to me.
349
00:16:10,102 --> 00:16:12,435
On the way home
from dinner tonight,
350
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:14,507
my car broke down in
the middle of nowhere.
351
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:16,768
We had to walk two
miles to a gas station,
352
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:19,174
get a tow truck, and
then get a cab back here.
353
00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:21,872
By that time, it was after 1:00,
I didn't have a place to stay,
354
00:16:22,014 --> 00:16:23,983
so Lauren told me I
could sleep in her room.
355
00:16:24,116 --> 00:16:25,636
She's down the hall
in Michelle's room.
356
00:16:25,718 --> 00:16:29,519
You expect me to believe
that your brand-new
357
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:33,285
$40,000 Porsche just
conveniently broke down tonight.
358
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:36,294
Actually, it was
closer to $50,000.
359
00:16:36,429 --> 00:16:39,297
Well, that's a very tough
story to swallow, Eric.
360
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,672
Well, that includes dealer
shipping and handling charges.
361
00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:43,111
Look, I'm talking
about what happened
362
00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:44,501
with you and Lauren tonight.
363
00:16:44,637 --> 00:16:46,401
Now, believe it or
not, some things in life
364
00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:48,250
are more important than
money and finance charges.
365
00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:51,005
You don't believe that.
366
00:16:51,143 --> 00:16:54,477
Well, uh, normally, I
don't, normally, I don't.
367
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:57,083
But... but in this case, Eric,
there definitely is something
368
00:16:57,216 --> 00:16:58,844
that's more important
to me than money.
369
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:01,955
Come on, Alex, nothing
matters more than money.
370
00:17:02,088 --> 00:17:03,420
I mean, let's be honest.
371
00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:05,716
That's what separates guys
like us from everybody else.
372
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:07,657
Look, that's not the point.
373
00:17:07,793 --> 00:17:10,490
Come on, Alex, we've
known it since we were kids.
374
00:17:10,630 --> 00:17:12,622
Remember the first time
you saw a dollar sign?
375
00:17:12,765 --> 00:17:15,667
April 22, 1971.
376
00:17:18,237 --> 00:17:20,365
My first time, I was coming
home from kindergarten.
377
00:17:20,506 --> 00:17:22,907
I was with a couple
of my other friends.
378
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,671
We passed a bank, and
there it was in the window.
379
00:17:25,811 --> 00:17:28,440
- The other guys know what it was?
- No.
380
00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,482
They just thought
it was a big "S"
381
00:17:30,616 --> 00:17:32,346
with two vertical
lines through it.
382
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:35,353
To me, it was a symbol of life.
383
00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:39,323
The other kids just went
home for milk and cookies.
384
00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:41,450
I knelt.
385
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:47,427
I don't deny it,
okay? I love money.
386
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:50,401
But there is definitely
something in my life
387
00:17:50,536 --> 00:17:52,528
that I love more... Lauren.
388
00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:56,074
All right, Alex, I'll
be honest with you.
389
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:58,905
I did come back here
wondering if Lauren and I
390
00:17:59,045 --> 00:18:00,911
could start seeing
each other again.
391
00:18:01,047 --> 00:18:02,538
But from the minute
I picked her up,
392
00:18:02,682 --> 00:18:04,173
all she did was talk about you.
393
00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:07,715
I could see she
was really in love.
394
00:18:07,853 --> 00:18:09,719
So I decided just to
have a good dinner,
395
00:18:09,855 --> 00:18:13,451
enjoy driving my new car,
get a good night's sleep.
396
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:15,585
Instead, dinner was
lousy and overpriced,
397
00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:18,459
my car's in the shop,
it's 2:07 in the morning,
398
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,965
and I'm wide awake.
399
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,161
What a bust this trip was.
400
00:18:24,303 --> 00:18:26,863
I just hope I can write it off.
401
00:18:30,509 --> 00:18:32,034
You'll be able to write it off.
402
00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:34,409
After all, we talked
about business, right?
403
00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:36,448
You could tell
them it was, uh...
404
00:18:36,582 --> 00:18:39,142
it was a recruiting session
for Dunn and Bradley.
405
00:18:48,427 --> 00:18:50,328
Hi, honey.
406
00:18:52,198 --> 00:18:53,598
What is this?
407
00:18:53,733 --> 00:18:56,931
Some overachiever pajama party?
408
00:18:57,069 --> 00:18:59,470
I'm sorry, honey.
Did we wake you?
409
00:18:59,605 --> 00:19:01,870
Alex, what are you doing here?
410
00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:04,876
Oh, listen, uh,
I talked to Eric.
411
00:19:05,011 --> 00:19:06,411
He explained everything.
412
00:19:06,545 --> 00:19:07,843
Don't worry.
413
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,608
What is there to explain?
414
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:12,776
Why don't I just, uh,
step out for a minute?
415
00:19:12,918 --> 00:19:14,045
Hey, hey, Lauren, listen,
416
00:19:14,186 --> 00:19:15,586
I-I wasn't gonna come over here.
417
00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:17,781
It's just that I kept calling,
and you weren't home.
418
00:19:17,923 --> 00:19:19,448
And-and the
restaurant said you left.
419
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:21,220
What? You called the restaurant?
420
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:23,124
Alex, why? Don't you trust me?
421
00:19:23,262 --> 00:19:25,959
Of course I trust you.
422
00:19:26,098 --> 00:19:27,691
You got a funny
way of showing it.
423
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:29,311
Hey, come on,
Lauren! Any other guy...
424
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,167
Alex, I don't care
about any other guy.
425
00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:32,999
I care about you.
426
00:19:33,139 --> 00:19:34,869
And our relationship. And trust!
427
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,771
You know, I can't
believe you did this.
428
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:38,741
I'm really mad at you.
429
00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:40,506
Lauren.
430
00:19:40,646 --> 00:19:42,638
Lauren.
431
00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:48,351
Hey, Dad.
432
00:19:48,487 --> 00:19:51,423
Where were you, Alex? It's 3:00.
433
00:19:51,557 --> 00:19:53,890
Oh, uh, just, I was
over at Lauren's.
434
00:19:54,026 --> 00:19:55,585
What are you doing up?
435
00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:58,095
Oh, just a little reading.
436
00:19:58,230 --> 00:20:00,961
Existentialism for Dads.
437
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:03,797
Yeah.
438
00:20:03,936 --> 00:20:06,565
There's one thing I can
say for Kierkegaard...
439
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:10,666
No matter how depressed
you are, he's more depressed.
440
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:15,475
In a strange way, it's
sort of a pick-me-up.
441
00:20:15,614 --> 00:20:18,516
- Mind if I borrow this book, Dad?
- Sure, sure.
442
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:20,279
I recommend chapter eight:
443
00:20:20,419 --> 00:20:22,513
"Existence is meaningless
and life is absurd,
444
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:26,023
so wipe that smile
off your face."
445
00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:28,491
What a rotten night, Dad.
446
00:20:28,627 --> 00:20:31,392
I-I was... I was going crazy
worrying about Lauren and Eric,
447
00:20:31,530 --> 00:20:33,761
so I went over there to
see what was happening.
448
00:20:33,899 --> 00:20:35,925
What was happening?
449
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:38,162
Nothing... until I got there.
450
00:20:38,304 --> 00:20:41,206
And-and, uh, now Lauren
thinks I don't trust her.
451
00:20:41,340 --> 00:20:45,368
I doubt she'll ever
talk to me again.
452
00:20:45,511 --> 00:20:47,503
Look, Alex,
there are a lot of...
453
00:20:50,316 --> 00:20:52,342
Let me just leave
you with a thought
454
00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:54,351
from the immortal Kierkegaard:
455
00:20:54,487 --> 00:20:57,821
"Women... can't live with them,
456
00:20:57,957 --> 00:20:59,858
can't live without them."
457
00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:07,962
- Hi.
- Hi.
458
00:21:10,736 --> 00:21:12,295
Lauren, I'm sorry.
459
00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:13,303
I'm really sorry.
460
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:14,964
Look, it's not all your fault.
461
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,837
I-I should have been more aware.
462
00:21:16,976 --> 00:21:19,639
I knew that even though you
were trying to act gracefully,
463
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:21,304
deep down it
really bothered you.
464
00:21:21,447 --> 00:21:22,447
That's the thing.
465
00:21:22,581 --> 00:21:24,573
I knew that you would think
466
00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:28,176
that deep down it...
it would bother me,
467
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,085
so... so I wanted
to go even deeper
468
00:21:31,223 --> 00:21:33,454
and prove that you were wrong.
469
00:21:33,592 --> 00:21:37,859
It just so happens that,
uh, I don't go that deep.
470
00:21:38,998 --> 00:21:41,160
You go plenty deep, Alex.
471
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,895
Too deep sometimes...
You overanalyze everything.
472
00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:46,437
I want you to have the best
of everything, you know?
473
00:21:46,572 --> 00:21:47,938
And then, when I met Eric,
474
00:21:48,073 --> 00:21:51,043
I just couldn't help but think
that maybe he was the best.
475
00:21:51,177 --> 00:21:52,736
Alex, I don't love Eric.
476
00:21:52,878 --> 00:21:54,972
Why not? I do.
477
00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:02,178
The point I'm trying to
make is that I love you,
478
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:04,321
and you're just gonna
have to learn to accept that.
479
00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:06,583
Maybe it might be a little
easier for me to accept that
480
00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:08,321
if-if I knew why you love me.
481
00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:10,326
What do you mean,
why do I love you?
482
00:22:10,462 --> 00:22:12,761
Well, in order for a guy
like me to feel secure,
483
00:22:12,898 --> 00:22:15,959
I-I have to know what it is
that you love about Alex Keaton.
484
00:22:16,101 --> 00:22:17,330
It's a lot of things.
485
00:22:17,469 --> 00:22:18,994
I can't just sit here
and name them.
486
00:22:19,138 --> 00:22:21,607
Why not?
487
00:22:22,775 --> 00:22:24,744
Because it just
doesn't work that way.
488
00:22:24,877 --> 00:22:26,869
Can you tell me why you love me?
489
00:22:27,012 --> 00:22:29,224
You're smart, you're beautiful,
you're warm, you're wise,
490
00:22:29,248 --> 00:22:30,546
you're witty, you're sensitive,
491
00:22:30,683 --> 00:22:32,203
you're kind to children
and old people,
492
00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:34,276
you care about what's
going on in the world.
493
00:22:34,420 --> 00:22:37,481
Boy, you're really good at this.
494
00:22:37,623 --> 00:22:39,558
Yeah, better than you. I'm...
495
00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:41,092
At least you could give me
496
00:22:41,227 --> 00:22:43,093
a token "you're a
nice guy" or something.
497
00:22:43,229 --> 00:22:46,028
All right, Alex, you want
to know why I love you?
498
00:22:46,165 --> 00:22:47,292
Yeah.
499
00:22:47,433 --> 00:22:48,867
Because of "The
Banana Boat Song."
500
00:22:51,503 --> 00:22:53,802
"The Banana Boat Song"?
501
00:22:53,939 --> 00:22:55,999
Yes. We were at one of those
502
00:22:56,141 --> 00:22:57,941
economic department
symposiums you drag me to,
503
00:22:58,043 --> 00:23:00,274
and some guy was droning
on for hours and hours
504
00:23:00,412 --> 00:23:02,313
about the deficit or the
surplus or something.
505
00:23:02,448 --> 00:23:04,280
I don't know. It was
excruciatingly boring.
506
00:23:06,085 --> 00:23:07,314
Then, suddenly, when I thought
507
00:23:07,453 --> 00:23:09,064
I just couldn't take
it for another minute,
508
00:23:09,088 --> 00:23:12,286
you... you sang to me
"The Banana Boat Song."
509
00:23:13,459 --> 00:23:16,588
♪ Day-o, Day-ay-ay-o ♪
510
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:20,689
♪ Daylight come and
me want to go home. ♪
511
00:23:20,833 --> 00:23:23,701
That's why I love you.
512
00:23:23,836 --> 00:23:26,271
You ever heard me do "Misty"?
513
00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:31,404
Alex, it was the fact that in
the middle of this stuffy affair
514
00:23:31,543 --> 00:23:32,823
with all your professors around,
515
00:23:32,912 --> 00:23:34,710
you sang me "The
Banana Boat Song."
516
00:23:34,847 --> 00:23:37,578
It didn't make any sense. It
was a complete contradiction.
517
00:23:37,716 --> 00:23:39,981
It's what makes
you uniquely you.
518
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:42,486
All right. All right.
519
00:23:42,621 --> 00:23:44,681
You can't come up
with anything concrete...
520
00:23:46,792 --> 00:23:48,454
that'll have to do.
521
00:23:48,594 --> 00:23:50,460
Alex, this isn't something
you have to define.
522
00:23:50,596 --> 00:23:52,155
You don't have to clarify.
523
00:23:52,298 --> 00:23:54,631
It just is. And it's wonderful!
524
00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:56,998
Sure, I could sit
around here all night
525
00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:59,765
and rattle off great
things about you.
526
00:24:02,508 --> 00:24:04,374
I got nowhere to go.
527
00:24:34,606 --> 00:24:36,404
Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
36072
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