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Original subtitles

Johnny mathis: ♪ I bet We've been together ♪

♪ for a million years ♪

Deniece williams: ♪ and I Bet we'll be together ♪

♪ for a million more ♪

♪ oh, it's like I Started breathing ♪

♪ on the night we kissed ♪

Both: ♪ and I can't remember ♪

♪ what I ever did before ♪

♪ what would we do, baby ♪

♪ without us? ♪

♪ what would we do, baby ♪

♪ without us? ♪

♪ and there ain't no nothin' ♪

♪ we can't love Each other through ♪

♪ ooh hoo ♪

♪ what would we do, baby ♪

♪ without us? ♪

♪ sha la la la ♪

Can't believe you did that, dad.

I don't know what I did That was so wrong, jen.

It was probably the single Most embarrassing moment

Of my life. That's all.

What happened?

Dad was driving Carpool today, ok...

Me and 2 other girls From the eighth grade

And mitzi kasselman, A ninth grader,

Captain of the cheerleaders,

And very popular.

We stopped at a red light.

It was quiet. And then dad says,

"Why don't we use this Time to have a mock debate

Between the u.S. And the soviet union?"

Dad, you didn't.

Then he turns to mitzi kasselman

And says, "Mitzi, You be gorbachev."

I'm dying.

Who's gorbachev?

That's what mitzi said.

If I could have crawled into The ashtray, I would have.

Look, look, up until then,

All the talk had been about Clothes and boys and movies.

I thought a little group discussion About the nuclear arms race

Would be a nice change of pace.

Come.

Mitzi kasselman as gorbachev.

There, there.

Who's this gorbachev?

I don't know what I Did that was so wrong.

I don't know. Maybe next time, Try mitzi kasselman as reagan.

Wha... Oh, it's just you, alex.

I'm equally excited To see you, mal.

Sorry. I was just, Uh, hopin' it was nick.

He's late, and I'm wondering Where he could be.

Maybe he's in stockholm

Accepting the nobel Prize for physics.

What time are you Expecting nick?

Over an hour ago.

He said he'd come right over Here after his job interview.

Job interview? Job interview?

Job interview? Job interview?

I wasn't supposed to say Anything in case they didn't hire him.

What kind of job is it?

Teaching art to kids at the "Y."

Boy, it would be neat To have nick as a teacher.

Yeah, you could all Cut classes together.

Um, ok, that's him.

Please don't let on that I Told you anything about this.

If he finds out, he swore He'd never speak to me again.

Never, you say?

Never, ever?

Hey.

Hey! Hey!

Did you get the job?

Come on, andy. I think it's time To go upstairs and play now.

Sorry. I didn't Mean to tell them.

I was excited. It Kind of slipped out.

Hey, I guess this means

You'll never speak To our daughter again.

Aw, I-it's all Right, mr. Keaton.

You know, I could never Really be mad at mallory.

But she told us, nick...

After you asked her not To in no uncertain terms.

Yeah, but, uh, she Was just excited.

I don't mind.

Nick...

She betrayed you.

I think you have no Choice but to leave her.

It really doesn't matter Anyway, mr. Keaton,

Because I didn't get the job.

Elyse: what?

I can't believe that. You Were perfect for that job.

They said that they Really wanted me.

They said that I would bring

A, uh, new and unusual Perspective to the program.

But they, uh, said they Couldn't hire anybody

Without a high school diploma.

Boy, that's a new one, isn't it?

So what do you Wanna do, tonight, mal?

Wanna go out, see a movie?

Um, sure, if that's What you wanna do.

I mean, if you're sure You wanna go out.

Yeah. Why wouldn't I want to?

I don't know. I know You feel a little down

About not gettin' the job.

Hey, mal, I'm fine.

I forgot all about it.

What job? See?

Aw, nick, I hate when You get this way.

It's not good to keep your Emotions all bottled up inside.

You'll end up like alex. You don't want that, do you?

None of us want that, mal.

Alex, if you had a Little sensitivity,

You'd be able to see That nick is very upset.

Look, if nick is so upset That he didn't get the job,

Why doesn't he go back to High school and get his diploma?

Hey, hey, hey, no way.

I am not goin' back to school.

You know, they make you Write papers and take tests.

I don't like to take tests.

You know, you gotta put These tiny little checks

In the right box. True or false?

What about a box for maybe? How Come they don't have a box for maybe?

You know? And how about A box for, uh, "Who cares"?

And what about a box for, uh,

"Ask me a different question."

Huh?

I liked you better when You were bottled up.

Um, nick, what about that?

I mean, what about Goi" back to school?

Ah, it's not for me.

Nick, it's the only way You're gonna get that job.

Think how great it would be

To teach those little Kids how to be creative.

You're so good with kids.

You could really inspire them.

Me as a teacher.

Wow!

I'd walk into the classroom,

And they'd stop makin' those Funny little noises that kids make

When the teacher Comes into the room.

They'd all sit up nice and Straight, and they'd say,

"Good morning, mr. Moore."

You know, nobody's Ever called me mr. Moore.

Except my grandfather.

He could never Remember my first name.

Good morning, mr. Moore.

Good morning, mallory.

You're looking very cute today.

Thank you, mr. Moore.

Oh, mal, I wanted That job so bad,

I couldn't sleep for 3 Nights thinkin' about it.

Then, nick, go back to school.

I mean, how many Classes are you short?

One. English.

English. I can help you.

English... English is one Of my better subjects.

I only had to take it twice.

Can't believe you Did it again, dad.

What did... What Did I do this time?

I followed your Instructions to the letter.

You told me I could Only talk about

How mitzi kasselman Looked, and that's what I did.

You told her she looked Like mrs. Gorbachev.

Who told her to Wear that fur hat?

You're never driving Carpool again, dad.

Great!

There isn't a father in america

Who wouldn't kill To hear those words.

Or russia.

Hi, dad. Hi, honey.

Um, would you guys mind Letting me have the living room?

Nick's gonna be over any minute.

I'm gonna help him study.

You're gonna help nick study?

I thought the idea was For nick to pass this course.

Alex, I don't want you To say anything to nick.

He's got his first big test tomorrow, And he's nervous enough already.

Ok, andy, why don't you Take your brother upstairs

And play with him until dinner,

And do not let him Out of your sight.

Come on, alex. Let's go color.

I don't wanna color.

It's the wall street Journal coloring book.

All right.

Come on!

Thanks, mom.

Hi, nick. Hey.

Hey, how's the studying coming?

Ah, to tell you the truth, mrs. Keaton, it's not goin' so good.

You know, it's a lot tougher than Sittin' around doin' nothin' all day.

Well, I'm... I'm sure you'll Find it just as rewarding.

Come on, nick. We Got a lot to cover

Before your test tomorrow.

Ok. Now...

What is a verb?

What does it do in a sentence?

Uh, it just kind of sits there,

Trying not to bother The other words.

No, nick, a verb is a word

That does something Active in a sentence,

Like "Walk" or "Run" or "Eat."

Yeah, but, uh, Eating's not active,

Unless you eat and run.

Well, you don't have to Be moving to be active.

You just have to Be doing something.

Well, what about if you're dead?

I mean, you can't be Active when you're dead

Unless you're a Ghost or vampire.

Well, you can use verbs For ghosts and vampires.

Uh, just not for Ordinary dead people, huh?

I'm gonna have to look that up.

I think they have Special verbs for them.

You know, this is Without a doubt

The most inane and Absurd conversation

I have ever heard.

Alex, what are you doing here?

What am I doing?

Well, I'm not doing anything,

So I guess I'll need

One of those special verbs.

Like you use for dead people.

Alex, I asked you not to come Down here while we're studying.

I'm sorry, but I was Just irresistibly drawn

Toward the... Towards this Awesome display of brainpower.

You know what? If You could harness

The mental energy in this room,

You could toast some bread.

Lightly.

What do I have to do, Alex, lock the door?

I'm coming, andrew. I'm coming.

You don't think I can Pass the test, do you, alex?

Truth?

Truth.

No.

Don't pay any attention to him.

Who are we Kidding? Alex is right.

I am wasting my time. I'm wasting your time.

Nick, you can't give up. The test is tomorrow.

Mal, I was born bein' Able to fix things.

I am good with my Hands, all right?

Other people, like you,

Are born being good at school.

Nick... Mal, I'm sorry.

I really appreciate what You're trying to do here for me.

I love you for It, but I'm quittin'.

I'm quitting school, Because I don't belong there.

Mallory, listen, I don't think It's fair for you to blame me.

Nick would not have quit School if nick didn't want to.

We were doin' just fine Until you came along.

At the very least, you Owe him an apology.

He asked me if I thought he'd pass The test, and I gave him my opinion.

What was I supposed to do, lie?

You shouldn't have Interfered, alex.

What would you say If nick'd asked you

If you thought he would pass?

Well, I would say, uh...

Yes.

I almost certainly Think he might...

Pass.

Or might not.

Oh, steven.

What would you say, elyse?

Me? I would say I Think he would pass.

You'd be lying.

Not necessarily lying.

Not necessarily Telling the truth.

Not necessarily.

I can't believe you guys.

None of you think Nick can do it.

I do.

Thank you, andrew.

Do what?

It doesn't matter whether or not

We think nick can do it.

It only matters whether or not

He thinks he can do it.

Well, that's a very Good point, jen.

But if nick thinks he Can do it, he's wrong.

Ok, look, we, uh... We better be going.

Uh, the, uh, play Starts at 8:00.

Good night, Sweetheart. Sleep well.

We'll check in on You when we get home.

Ok, have a good time.

Bye-bye. Come on.

Drive safe. Good night.

Just wait a minute, alex. I wanna Talk to you about something, ok?

I am really tired about Your attitude towards nick.

You're wrong about him.

I know that if nick and I studied a little more,

He'd be able to pass that Course and get his diploma.

Ok, excuse me, mal.

I happened to overhear one of Your so-called study sessions,

And there is no way...

That nick is gonna Get that diploma.

In fact, you'll be lucky

If they don't take yours away.

Nick.

Hey.

I'm, uh, sorry about before,

Runnin' out on you, babe.

I came back to apologize.

Andrew, wait a minute.

Wait a minute, andrew.

I thought you were going to bed.

I can't sleep. I'm Afraid of the dark.

I don't know what to do. I can't Convince him to get into bed.

Come on, andrew.

No. I'm afraid of the Dark. I can't go to sleep.

Maybe it's because you don't Have your dream hat, andy.

What's a dream hat?

Well, you see, it's A hat you put on

To help you get to sleep and Have great dreams at night.

Do you have one?

Sure do, but mine's at home.

Tell you what, though. I'll make You one. Would you like that?

Yeah. Yeah.

Ok.

Now, you see, it's Shaped like a cloud,

Because that's what Dreamland is made up of.

And it's got all These stars on it,

Because the sky in dreamland

Is full of stars When you're dreamin'.

And it's also got all the Colors of the rainbow.

You see?

Because that's how You get to dreamland.

You slide up and Down on a rainbow.

That's a wonderful hat, andy.

You're really lucky to have it.

Will you help Jennifer put me to bed?

My pleasure.

Come on.

Great. Say good night.

Good night. Good night.

That was impressive, mal.

I had no idea Nick could be so...

Useful.

I just... I...

He's got a great imagination.

Alex, you've seen Nick with andy.

And you know how Good he is with kids.

This job means Everything to him.

He's gotta get that diploma,

And there's only one Way he's gonna do it.

You've got to help him.

Me? Don't be...

You gotta be kidding, mal.

Alex, please, you're the only One smart enough to do it.

Yeah, well, that's true, but I Shouldn't be penalized for that.

Come in.

Hello, nick.

Alex. What are you doin' here?

So this is your place, huh?

It's exactly how I Imagined it would look.

Want some chips or Nuts or somethin'?

Yeah. Yeah, that would, uh... That'd be nice, nick. Thanks.

Yeah, and I, uh, think there's Some more chips in the couch there.

There you go.

Put on a nice spread, nick.

So, uh, what is this, A, uh, social call?

Uh, well, actually, nick,

I wanted to talk to You about school.

What's there to talk About? I'm quittin'.

I've been watchin' You with andy,

You know, how good You are with him, with kids.

And, uh, I couldn't Help thinking to myself,

You know, "This guy does not Have to be a total drain on society."

Hey, thanks.

No, nick, listen. What I'm sayin' is this.

If you don't quit the class,

I'll help you pass The test tomorrow.

I am not going Back to that class.

I already know Everything I need to know

To get by in my world.

That kind of learning is For you and your world,

And that's a world that I don't Wanna be no part of. Thank you, alex.

Nick, nick, come on.

I'm not interested in taking You out of your world.

It's so clearly Where you belong.

I'm just interested in Making your world bigger.

Why is it so important to You that I go to that class?

Because it's Important to mallory.

And if it's important To mallory,

It's important to me.

And if it's important to me...

It's important to the world.

"I shall spend the Winter in minnesota."

Now, what's the personal Pronoun in that sentence?

Uh... Personal pronoun...

Come on, nick. The word that Refers to the person speaking.

Uh, that would be me, nick.

"I" is the personal pronoun.

That'd be you, alex.

Come on. You're not Gettin' this at all.

I am... I am trying to.

The trouble is I am not Used to dealing with words.

You know, I'm used to dealing With much bigger things,

Like, uh, motorcycles.

Ok, nick. All right.

Let's put this into terms That you can relate to.

A sentence is just Like a motorcycle.

Uh-huh. Ok?

It's not gonna work if it Doesn't have all the right parts.

Now, e-every sentence Needs a noun, right?

That's the word that all the Other words revolve around.

So what part would That be on a motorcycle?

Ha! Chassis!

Good. Ok, great.

Um, now you also Need a verb, right,

To, um... To show what action Takes place in the sentence.

Now, what makes a Motorcycle move?

Engine.

Ok. All right. Ok, um...

You startin' to understand What I'm talkin' about now?

Nah, but I'm havin' more fun.

"The rose is beautiful."

Noun?

Rose.

Adjective?

Carburetor.

Nick.

Ah, I was just Fooling you, teach.

In the sentence "The Rose is beautiful,"

The adjective is... "Beautiful"!

Beautiful!

Hey, you look kinda cute Sittin' up there on my bike

Wearin' my jacket.

Bet you'd get thrown out of your Fraternity for lookin' like that.

Nick, I'd get thrown Out of my fraternity

Just for bein' in This neighborhood.

We're from 2 different Worlds, aren't we, alex?

At least.

I've seen your type before.

We used to have a name for Guys like you in high school...

Students.

You were always Smart, weren't you, alex?

From day one, nick.

You know, I remember When I was a baby

Lying in my crib, looking Up at my parents, thinking,

"You people have A lot to learn."

Scary thing is

I just kept gettin' smarter.

I mean, every day, I'd think,

"This is as smart as a Human being can get,"

And the next Day, I'd be smarter.

And I'd look back and say,

"How could you be so stupid?"

All I remember is lying There in my crib, thinkin',

"What the hell am I doing here?"

Hour to the test. You gonna be ready?

I don't know, alex.

You know, I got all These little words

Runnin' around in my head,

Trying to figure out Where they belong.

I hope they all just don't panic

And run away before the test.

They're not goin' Anywhere, nick.

They belong to you now.

And I'm gonna take Very good care of 'em,

Especially the verbs,

'cause they're such Busy little words.

Gotta hand it to you, nick.

Really, you've learned More in one night

Than, uh, a lot of people Learn in a whole semester.

This is what it's like to Be a smart guy like you.

Somebody asks you a Question, you know the answer.

No wonder you like Yourself so much.

Oh, it's... It's 11:00.

The test has been over For an hour. Where is he?

I don't know. Maybe He got stuck in traffic.

Oh, the least he Could do is call!

He knows we're waiting Here on pins and needles.

Don't worry. I'm sure We'll hear from him.

I should have gone there. I Could have waited outside.

That way, I could Have been the first one

To see his face, to Know how he was feeling.

This is nick I'm talkin' about!

I-I've lost my mind From not enough sleep.

Any word from nick yet?

No.

Well, andy bought Him a special present.

Show 'em andy.

What happened To nick's lollipop?

It was a long ride home.

Alex, you look terrible. Why don't you get some sleep?

I can't sleep until I know What happened to nick.

It's nice to see how close You and nick are becoming.

Wait a minute.

Look, nick and I are not now,

Nor will we ever be... Close.

Nick! Where have you been?

Nick, we're dyin'. How'd You do on the test?

I passed!

Oh, let me see!

"C" minus! He passed!

Nick, you're a genius.

I am so proud of you.

And you, too, alex.

You really came Through for me, pal.

I appreciate it.

Hey.

That is an interjection.

Whoa!

An exclamation.

Stop it!

An imperative.

I've created a monster!

Sit, ubu, sit.

Good dog.

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