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1
00:00:04,872 --> 00:00:06,438
I don't wanna go.
2
00:00:06,540 --> 00:00:09,975
- You have to go.
- It's just a stupid
camping trip.
3
00:00:10,077 --> 00:00:12,544
It's the great hunt.
4
00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:14,946
Nobody hunts anything.
What's the point?
5
00:00:15,048 --> 00:00:17,861
The point is it's a profound
and sacred tradition
6
00:00:17,885 --> 00:00:20,897
where all male dinosaurs
connect with their primitive past
7
00:00:20,921 --> 00:00:23,655
and celebrate their
primal savagery.
8
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:25,624
Dehydrated beef stroganoff?
9
00:00:25,726 --> 00:00:28,526
Sacred dehydrated
beef stroganoff.
10
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:31,629
Face it, Dad,
we're civilized now.
11
00:00:31,731 --> 00:00:34,866
We gave up all that primitive
savage stuff a long time ago.
12
00:00:34,969 --> 00:00:37,503
It's all just a lame
excuse for a camping trip.
13
00:00:37,605 --> 00:00:41,406
It's a sacred ritual and it's
even more sacreder this year
14
00:00:41,508 --> 00:00:45,177
because your father has been
selected by his tribal brethren
15
00:00:45,279 --> 00:00:48,780
to play the part of the fierce
and awesome warrior chief.
16
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:51,917
Here's your sweater, chief.
17
00:00:52,019 --> 00:00:54,620
I clipped on your mittens so
you won't lose them this time.
18
00:00:54,722 --> 00:00:58,390
Oh, thanks. Hey, Fran, you
appreciate family traditions.
19
00:00:58,492 --> 00:01:00,732
Would you please
explain to your son here
20
00:01:00,761 --> 00:01:04,696
- the significance
of the great hunt?
- Well, as I understand it...
21
00:01:04,798 --> 00:01:06,798
It's a camping trip.
22
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,800
Forget all of you.
23
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,814
It's a sublime and
beautiful experience
24
00:01:10,838 --> 00:01:13,538
only a fellow male
can appreciate.
25
00:01:13,641 --> 00:01:15,240
Hey, road trip.
26
00:01:15,342 --> 00:01:17,275
Hail, fellow warrior.
27
00:01:17,377 --> 00:01:19,044
- Roar!
- Roar!
28
00:01:19,146 --> 00:01:22,881
Roar, roar, roar!
29
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:24,816
Are the other warriors
ready to head out?
30
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,897
Oh, just as soon as Sid gets
here with the de-humidifier.
31
00:01:27,921 --> 00:01:29,687
- Oogety-boogety.
- Boo.
32
00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:32,490
La, la, la. He's all yours.
33
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:34,459
Mindy invited me
over for the weekend.
34
00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:36,105
- I am outta here. Ha!
- Oh, Charlene,
35
00:01:36,129 --> 00:01:38,508
are you sure you
wouldn't rather stay here?
36
00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:41,834
Monica and Lena are coming
over. It'll be just us girls.
37
00:01:41,936 --> 00:01:46,538
Gee, Mom, it sounds great, but
it might be actually too much fun
38
00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:49,875
and the rest of my life would
be just a big letdown. Bye.
39
00:01:49,977 --> 00:01:53,779
On my way. Oh, uh, bye,
Dad. Have a fun camping trip.
40
00:01:53,881 --> 00:01:56,381
- Sacred ritual.
- Whatever.
41
00:01:56,483 --> 00:02:00,519
Well, sweetheart, are you
all excited about your trip?
42
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:02,454
Yeah. Wanna go hunting.
43
00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:05,624
Well, at least one of my sons
isn't afraid of being a male.
44
00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:07,458
Oh, gimme a break.
45
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,205
Got your duffel bag all packed?
46
00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:10,996
Yeah. Where's Mama's duffel bag?
47
00:02:11,098 --> 00:02:14,266
- Mama's not going.
- Mama's not going?
48
00:02:14,367 --> 00:02:16,534
Hey, little guy, we're
gonna have a great time.
49
00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:19,371
Don't let him take me! Mama!
50
00:02:19,473 --> 00:02:21,906
Earl, don't be too
rough. He's just a baby.
51
00:02:22,008 --> 00:02:23,408
Now don't worry, Frannie.
52
00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:26,578
He leaves here a sensitive,
carefree, uninhibited soul.
53
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:28,913
But he'll come
back a male. Ahh...
54
00:02:29,016 --> 00:02:32,917
Mama! Don't wanna be a
male! Don't let him take me!
55
00:02:33,020 --> 00:02:34,852
Don't let him take me!
56
00:02:34,954 --> 00:02:36,721
Are they gone?
57
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:38,067
Yes.
58
00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:40,825
All right. I'm
taking off my girdle.
59
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:42,661
Stand back.
60
00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:45,096
Oh... no...
61
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,995
Honey, I'm home.
62
00:03:22,636 --> 00:03:24,102
Aaah!
63
00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:27,149
- Ohh!
- Ow!
64
00:03:27,173 --> 00:03:29,775
- Ow!
- Ooh!
65
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:31,476
Aah!
66
00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:45,289
Yeah. Hey, I think this
is the sacred ritual spot.
67
00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:50,228
Oh, yeah. It doesn't get
any more sacred than this.
68
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:53,264
- You betcha.
- Hey, hey.
69
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,567
Yep, love it.
70
00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:57,769
Well then, as warrior chief,
71
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:01,473
I say we begin part one of
the ancient ceremony right now.
72
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,174
Beer break!
73
00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:05,710
Yes!
74
00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:08,113
- Where's the cooler?
- Oh, Robbie!
75
00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:10,481
Uh, which part of the
ceremony is this, Dad?
76
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:13,351
The ancient rite of making
the son carry all your gear?
77
00:04:13,453 --> 00:04:14,686
No.
78
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:15,908
This is the ancient rite
79
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:18,222
of making the son stay
far behind the others,
80
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:20,925
so we don't have to
listen to his whining.
81
00:04:21,027 --> 00:04:25,430
That's funny.
82
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:28,266
You know, guys, it doesn't
get any better than this.
83
00:04:28,368 --> 00:04:33,004
Out here with my best buds in the
bosom of nature, I feel totally at home.
84
00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:34,284
I'm with ya there.
85
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:35,985
Out here I feel
comfortable enough
86
00:04:36,009 --> 00:04:39,945
to express my true
aggressive nature.
87
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:49,388
- Spi... spi...
- What?
88
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:52,435
Spi... spi... spi...
spi... spi... spi...
89
00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:53,758
Spider!
90
00:04:53,860 --> 00:04:57,328
Get it off! Get
it off! Get it off!!
91
00:04:57,430 --> 00:04:59,864
Get it off! Get it off!
Get it off! Get it off!
92
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:03,335
Yo, guys!
93
00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:06,104
I think the ferocious
garden spider's gone now.
94
00:05:06,206 --> 00:05:08,673
You warriors can relax.
95
00:05:08,775 --> 00:05:11,843
- Close one there, Earl. Jeez.
- Yeah.
96
00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:15,480
You know, it's
true what they say.
97
00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:18,416
A brush with one's own
mortality changes a guy.
98
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:20,818
I feel strangely calm now,
99
00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:26,324
with an... awakened deep
inner longing for life. Hmm...
100
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:28,593
- I could go for a beer too.
- Whoa!
101
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:33,431
Tall frosty boy
comin' right at ya.
102
00:05:33,533 --> 00:05:36,468
Whoop. This isn't beer.
103
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:39,871
This is coffee!
104
00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:41,418
- Huh?
- What?
105
00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:45,143
International coffee.
We can't drink this.
106
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:47,412
Where's the beer?
107
00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,681
How'd all this beer get in here?
108
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,783
Why ask why?
109
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:53,551
Mother?
110
00:05:53,653 --> 00:05:57,033
The universe acts in mysterious
and wonderful ways, Fran.
111
00:05:57,057 --> 00:06:00,358
And so do I. Toss me a cold one.
112
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:03,728
Oh, gosh, I haven't
had a beer in a long time.
113
00:06:05,131 --> 00:06:07,209
What do ya say,
Fran? Let's split one.
114
00:06:07,233 --> 00:06:10,234
- Well, I suppose
I could have a sip.
- Yeah.
115
00:06:10,336 --> 00:06:12,770
Just to unwind.
116
00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:14,639
- Lena?
- Oh, uh,
117
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:16,975
Sid doesn't like
it if I drink beer.
118
00:06:17,076 --> 00:06:19,610
He says it's, um, unladylike.
119
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:23,715
When Sid knows what it's like to
lay an egg twice the size of your head,
120
00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:26,885
then let him tell ya
about what's ladylike.
121
00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:28,253
Beer me, Fran.
122
00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:30,989
- All right. Places, everyone.
- Yeah.
123
00:06:32,025 --> 00:06:34,270
Now, do we have
all our warriors?
124
00:06:34,294 --> 00:06:35,405
- Yep.
- Ready.
125
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:37,574
Do we have our
ferocious, scary beast?
126
00:06:37,598 --> 00:06:40,132
- Yeah. Can
somebody zip me up?
- Sure.
127
00:06:40,234 --> 00:06:44,502
And warrior Robbie, are you ready to
read from the great book of the legend?
128
00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:47,939
Yeah, fine. Anything to get
through this ridiculous waste of time.
129
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:49,774
That's the spirit.
130
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:53,978
And now let the
great hunt begin.
131
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,324
- Yeah.
- Cue.
132
00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,418
Uh, "long ago, when
the earth was young
133
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:04,255
and great dinosaurs roamed
the land in savage packs...
134
00:07:06,159 --> 00:07:09,927
there lived a most fierce
and awesome warrior."
135
00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:15,533
Duh, I am Earl, a most
fierce and awesome warrior.
136
00:07:15,635 --> 00:07:17,369
Uh-huh, OK. Uh...
137
00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:21,806
"One day this mighty warrior and
his slightly less mighty warrior friends
138
00:07:21,908 --> 00:07:25,476
- heard the distant
pounding of drums."
- Hark!
139
00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:29,414
Boom, boom, boom...
Boom, boom, boom...
140
00:07:29,516 --> 00:07:31,194
"This could mean but one thing:
141
00:07:31,218 --> 00:07:34,952
headed their way was the most
vicious and merciless creature
142
00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:36,354
ever to walk the earth,
143
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:39,991
the beast with eyes of
fire and teeth of stone."
144
00:07:40,093 --> 00:07:43,929
Roar. Roar. Fear me
and cower in terror.
145
00:07:44,031 --> 00:07:45,642
- Oh. Sheesh.
- Not yet.
146
00:07:45,666 --> 00:07:48,132
Oh, sorry.
147
00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:50,869
Uh, "The female dinosaurs
heard the drums too
148
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:54,305
and as they are wont to
do in this kind of situation,
149
00:07:54,408 --> 00:07:58,342
completely lost their heads in
flighty hormonal fits of hysteria."
150
00:07:58,445 --> 00:07:59,911
Oh, please.
151
00:08:00,013 --> 00:08:02,680
Where is a male to rescue me?
152
00:08:02,782 --> 00:08:05,016
I am helpless without a male.
153
00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:09,354
"But the males were rocks
of courage and fortitude.
154
00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:13,291
- They took up
their pointy sticks...
- Stick for you and for you.
155
00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:15,370
And headed off
into the wilderness
156
00:08:15,394 --> 00:08:18,630
to face the vicious beast
with its horrible roar."
157
00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:20,965
Oh, pardon me.
158
00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:24,669
I don't think I've
ever felt so relaxed.
159
00:08:24,771 --> 00:08:27,731
Yeah. With the boys gone,
there's no one to pick up after.
160
00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:31,509
No laundry, no
diapers, no cooking.
161
00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:33,645
- I could get used to this.
- Yeah.
162
00:08:33,747 --> 00:08:35,624
Ah, sitting around like a lump,
163
00:08:35,648 --> 00:08:38,649
doing nothing,
thinking only of myself.
164
00:08:38,751 --> 00:08:43,054
It's just like being a guy.
165
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:47,091
- What else do guys do?
- They scratch themselves.
166
00:08:47,194 --> 00:08:49,427
Well, I'm game.
167
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:52,730
Oh.
168
00:08:52,832 --> 00:08:55,166
Ahh...
169
00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:58,236
That wasn't half bad. What else?
170
00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:02,207
Well, they eat salted
snacks and watch TV.
171
00:09:02,309 --> 00:09:04,476
- Well, all right.
- OK.
172
00:09:04,577 --> 00:09:06,811
What an exciting
first quarter of action:
173
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:10,248
two teams going horn to horn in
what may be the oldest grudge match
174
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:13,018
- in professional football.
- Football, nah.
175
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:16,387
Not so fast! Look
at those uniforms.
176
00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,656
Oh, what an
appealing color pallet.
177
00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:23,828
Forget the color. Look
how tight those pants are.
178
00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:27,331
- Ooh...
- Mm-hmm...
179
00:09:27,433 --> 00:09:31,169
"After days and days in the
deepest, darkest part of the forest,
180
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,191
the great hunters
knew they were close.
181
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:36,875
They could smell the stench of
the hideous beast thick in the air."
182
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:43,881
Sorry, guys. Must have
been the sacred stroganoff.
183
00:09:43,983 --> 00:09:45,650
Roy! Sheesh.
184
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:47,552
Well...
185
00:09:47,654 --> 00:09:49,987
"Suddenly, from
behind a wall of trees,
186
00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:52,056
the giant gruesome
beast emerged,
187
00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:54,693
greeting them with an
earth-shattering roar."
188
00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:59,464
Roar! Fear me and cower,
for I am vast and ferocious,
189
00:09:59,565 --> 00:10:02,166
like no beast you
have ever seen.
190
00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:05,202
Tremble in my terrible presence.
191
00:10:05,304 --> 00:10:08,873
"But the warriors were not afraid.
They bravely stood their ground."
192
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:13,177
Roar. Hee hee.
193
00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:23,722
- Whoa!
- Wait a minute!
194
00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:28,493
A little too scary and
ferocious for you, huh?
195
00:10:28,595 --> 00:10:31,529
Roar.
196
00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:35,766
Nice costume.
197
00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:38,536
Ahh...
198
00:10:49,950 --> 00:10:52,028
- What's it doing now?
- Brace yourself, Sid.
199
00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:54,172
- What?
- He's going
for your gas grill.
200
00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:55,753
Not the grill!
201
00:10:55,855 --> 00:11:00,324
Oh, jeez! It was so young.
- I'm so sorry.
202
00:11:00,426 --> 00:11:03,695
Well, there it all goes.
203
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:08,165
The food, the tents, the
barbecue grill, the electric blankets.
204
00:11:08,267 --> 00:11:11,969
Everything we brought is in
his stomach, and we're next.
205
00:11:12,071 --> 00:11:13,871
Hey, I saved the cooler.
206
00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:16,540
- Oh, well I spoke too soon.
- What?
207
00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:18,542
Looks like we won't
go hungry after all,
208
00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:21,112
because we've got coffee
from all over the world!
209
00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:23,281
Yeah, great goin', Gus.
210
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:26,284
Now we'll be wide awake
when he chews our faces off!
211
00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:30,154
Hey, I didn't see you out there
fightin' for the pimento loaf.
212
00:11:30,257 --> 00:11:32,624
What do you want
from me? He's the chief.
213
00:11:32,725 --> 00:11:36,127
Me? Me?! What are you talking
about? You were ahead of me!
214
00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:39,263
I didn't see you taking the
pointy stick and defending me.
215
00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,932
Ha! Huh?
216
00:11:42,469 --> 00:11:43,746
Oh!
217
00:11:43,770 --> 00:11:46,838
Peek-a-boo, I see you!
218
00:11:46,939 --> 00:11:49,573
Huh?
219
00:11:49,676 --> 00:11:51,843
- Uh, guys... guys.
- He's trying to get in!
220
00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:55,145
He's gonna eat us!
221
00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:59,551
- Feed it Roy! I'll get his hind end.
- Yeah, yeah...
222
00:11:59,653 --> 00:12:01,352
Huh? No, I don't like that idea.
223
00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:03,399
Wait a minute!
I've got beef jerky.
224
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:05,823
- We'll feed him this.
- Good idea, son.
225
00:12:05,925 --> 00:12:07,258
Yeah.
226
00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:14,132
He'll be chewing
on that for a week.
227
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:16,968
Great idea, son!
228
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:21,005
Yeah, that's my boy!
229
00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:23,975
"Feed it Roy?"
230
00:12:26,512 --> 00:12:28,023
- Well... uh...
- Hey...
231
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:31,727
takes the kick on
the five, the ten...
232
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,263
- He breaks right! Up the sideline!
- Take him down!
233
00:12:34,287 --> 00:12:36,487
- Go for his knees!
- Kick him where it hurts!
234
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,523
- He's going all the way!
- No... oh...
235
00:12:38,625 --> 00:12:40,358
- Touchdown!
- Oh, no!
236
00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:42,293
- You stink!
- Boo!
237
00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:45,329
Oh, no! They shot him!
238
00:12:45,432 --> 00:12:48,799
And that's the first half. We'll be
back right after these messages.
239
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:52,904
Hey, there's a tractor
pull on Channel 49.
240
00:12:53,006 --> 00:12:56,374
No, no, no, no, no.
Switch back to wrestling.
241
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:59,143
I wanna see the
guy in the tights.
242
00:12:59,245 --> 00:13:02,746
Yeah. Yeah!
243
00:13:02,849 --> 00:13:06,985
Hey, right, yeah...
244
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:10,221
Baby got back! Whoa!
245
00:13:13,093 --> 00:13:16,394
Fatty roast beef with
lots of melted cheese.
246
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:21,666
Oh, fresh coconut
squares hot from the oven.
247
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:25,603
Gobs of cookie dough
straight out of the tube.
248
00:13:25,705 --> 00:13:28,406
- Chocolate brownies.
- Stop!
249
00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:31,609
I can't take it anymore.
It's been 18 hours!
250
00:13:31,711 --> 00:13:36,514
If I don't get something to eat
now, I'm really gonna lose it. I swear!
251
00:13:42,588 --> 00:13:45,256
Whatcha lookin' at, Uncle Sid?
252
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:50,228
Hmm, oh, boy, fresh leg of lamb!
253
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,597
- Sid! Sid, please!
- Get away from me!
254
00:13:52,699 --> 00:13:54,966
Hey!
255
00:13:55,067 --> 00:13:58,213
We didn't come out here into
the wilderness to fight each other.
256
00:13:58,237 --> 00:14:00,638
We came out here for
the great hunt, right?
257
00:14:00,740 --> 00:14:03,474
- Yeah.
- Well, now's our chance.
258
00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:07,111
There's a real beast out there.
I say we go hunt him down!
259
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:10,415
- Yeah.
- Together, we can do it!
260
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,150
All right!
261
00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:16,420
Let's show that towering mass
of death who owns this jungle!
262
00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:18,189
- Right!
- Yeah!
263
00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:19,731
- Well...
- Um...
264
00:14:21,194 --> 00:14:22,560
We were all with you, son,
265
00:14:22,662 --> 00:14:25,196
right up until the "towering
mass of death" part.
266
00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:28,032
- Hmm, what he said.
- We really
should do something.
267
00:14:28,134 --> 00:14:29,901
Yeah, but we
mustn't act in haste.
268
00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:32,603
- Ah.
- Wait. I suggest
that we have a meeting
269
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:35,172
and discuss Robbie's
proposal at length.
270
00:14:35,274 --> 00:14:37,052
- Ah.
- - Someone has to moderate.
271
00:14:37,076 --> 00:14:39,043
Yeah, and who's
gonna take the minutes?
272
00:14:39,145 --> 00:14:42,813
Oh! I will. Does anybody have
a pen? Oh, Robbie's got a pen.
273
00:14:42,916 --> 00:14:46,717
- Hey, Robbie, could I...?
- I can't write, so...
274
00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:47,820
Where'd he go?
275
00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:50,254
- Oh...
- Robbie?!
276
00:14:50,356 --> 00:14:53,524
Robbie?!
277
00:14:55,762 --> 00:14:57,828
Oh, my gosh!
278
00:14:57,931 --> 00:15:00,331
That brave, brave boy.
279
00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:04,001
Risking his life
to look for a pen.
280
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:13,711
Try not to dwell
on it, pally boy.
281
00:15:13,813 --> 00:15:16,781
Don't think of that massive
multi-toothed monster
282
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:19,784
as he clutched your helpless son
283
00:15:19,886 --> 00:15:23,065
and sucked the tender
meat off his bones.
284
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:26,257
Aw, jeez, I'm
gettin' hungry again.
285
00:15:26,359 --> 00:15:29,227
- Rob?
- Dad!
286
00:15:29,328 --> 00:15:32,497
- I'm back
and I brought food!
- Huh?
287
00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:34,732
Oh, my son!
288
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:38,736
It was amazing! There I
was, alone in the woods
289
00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:41,004
with nothing but
my two bare hands.
290
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:43,974
Yeah, fascinating. Uh, perhaps
if we talk about it over dinner?
291
00:15:44,076 --> 00:15:48,679
Wait. N-n-n-no! It was incredible.
I drew on my primitive instincts
292
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:51,382
and stalked it just
like our ancestors did.
293
00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,884
And then, when
there was no escape,
294
00:15:53,986 --> 00:15:57,221
I plunged my pointy stick
savagely into its heart,
295
00:15:57,323 --> 00:16:01,459
and at that moment I
knew I was a hunter!
296
00:16:01,561 --> 00:16:04,562
Do you know
what that feels like?
297
00:16:04,664 --> 00:16:07,131
- Duh...
- Well, uh...
298
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:10,334
I hit something
driving to work once.
299
00:16:10,436 --> 00:16:13,037
I think it was a cat.
300
00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:15,373
Well, it was either him or me.
301
00:16:17,276 --> 00:16:20,077
Well, good story. We're all
proud of you, son. Let's eat.
302
00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:22,413
Yeah, food.
303
00:16:24,517 --> 00:16:26,584
What's for dessert?
304
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:29,320
What? What?
305
00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:32,256
N-n-n-no, guys!
Guys! It's OK, really.
306
00:16:32,358 --> 00:16:36,260
Don't you see? Look, I went
out there, I hunted and killed.
307
00:16:36,362 --> 00:16:38,442
That hunter instinct
is alive in all of us.
308
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:41,431
Together, we can
take on that beast!
309
00:16:41,533 --> 00:16:43,700
Um, no, we can't.
310
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:45,848
Why? What's holding you back?
311
00:16:45,872 --> 00:16:47,704
- Fear.
- Fatigue.
312
00:16:47,806 --> 00:16:49,040
Low self-esteem.
313
00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:51,020
But isn't that why
we came out here?
314
00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:54,344
To rediscover the primitive
dinosaur within each of us?
315
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:56,447
Gee, I don't know, son.
316
00:16:56,549 --> 00:17:01,118
We are dinosaurs and therefore there's
a primitive, brutal beast in each of us.
317
00:17:01,821 --> 00:17:04,121
And yet we're also civilized
318
00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:07,625
and so we've all turned
into a big bunch of wussies.
319
00:17:07,727 --> 00:17:10,594
The duality of the
male experience.
320
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,074
- Yeah.
- Wow.
321
00:17:12,098 --> 00:17:14,977
Robbie's just introduced a
heady concept to the group.
322
00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:16,968
- Hmm, yes.
- I feel a need to explore
323
00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:19,070
- this emotional dichotomy.
- Yeah.
324
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:21,071
We've got some
international coffees.
325
00:17:21,173 --> 00:17:22,673
Why don't I brew up a fresh pot?
326
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,286
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
327
00:17:24,310 --> 00:17:27,044
You know, I never took a close
look and examined the real...
328
00:17:29,615 --> 00:17:32,984
I just feel I don't have
the emotional tools
329
00:17:33,085 --> 00:17:35,853
to really connect with
the "me" I wanna be.
330
00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:37,666
- I'm hearing you.
- Yeah.
331
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:41,058
- We're connecting.
- Guys, I'd like to share.
332
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:42,960
- Ah...
- Go ahead, Earl.
333
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,996
I so much want to
be the wild beast,
334
00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:49,333
to roam the forest primeval
for months at a time...
335
00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:51,469
- Go on.
- And yet I'm torn.
336
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:54,272
I can only program my
VCR two weeks in advance.
337
00:17:54,374 --> 00:17:55,806
Ahh.
338
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,274
More mocha cream?
339
00:17:57,376 --> 00:17:59,210
No thanks, Sid.
340
00:17:59,312 --> 00:18:02,213
Uh, guys, there's
a monster outside.
341
00:18:02,315 --> 00:18:03,425
Robbie...
342
00:18:03,449 --> 00:18:04,815
Perhaps it's more important
343
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:08,819
that each of us grapple
with the monster in here.
344
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,255
- Good point, Gus.
- Well said, Gus.
345
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:15,392
You know, this is beautiful.
346
00:18:15,495 --> 00:18:20,297
We're all exploring our
feminine sides here and that's OK.
347
00:18:20,399 --> 00:18:21,599
Uh-huh.
348
00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:24,034
It's healthy to get in
touch with those qualities
349
00:18:24,136 --> 00:18:27,805
that make females the
sensitive, nurturing types they are.
350
00:18:27,907 --> 00:18:31,041
- Pull my finger.
- Oh, Mother, not again.
351
00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:33,977
Hey, Fran, toss me
another cold one.
352
00:18:34,079 --> 00:18:36,914
Here ya go.
353
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:40,150
Good catch.
354
00:18:40,252 --> 00:18:43,354
- You know, I was just
thinking of Earl.
- Yeah.
355
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:47,958
How he has that way of always
saying something absolutely idiotic,
356
00:18:48,061 --> 00:18:50,127
and I listen patiently,
357
00:18:50,229 --> 00:18:52,596
and I just want to
wring his chubby neck.
358
00:18:52,698 --> 00:18:54,164
Hmm.
359
00:18:54,266 --> 00:18:56,645
I think I'm starting
to miss the guy.
360
00:18:56,669 --> 00:18:59,070
- You know, Sid's
really stupid too.
- Yeah?
361
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:01,716
As a matter of fact, the
only reason I married him
362
00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:05,175
is that he has a nice butt.
363
00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:08,111
I wonder what those
boneheads are doing right now.
364
00:19:08,213 --> 00:19:12,883
Probably prancing around buck-naked,
slapping each other with towels,
365
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:14,952
and whooping like jungle beasts.
366
00:19:15,054 --> 00:19:17,454
Well...
367
00:19:17,556 --> 00:19:19,523
So what are we doin' here?
368
00:19:19,625 --> 00:19:21,458
Let's go get 'em, girls!
369
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:23,294
Road trip!
370
00:19:23,396 --> 00:19:26,230
♪ Kumbaya ♪
371
00:19:26,332 --> 00:19:30,100
♪ Kumbaya ♪
372
00:19:30,203 --> 00:19:32,002
- Nice harmony.
- Thanks.
373
00:19:32,104 --> 00:19:34,705
- Oh, this is
a special time.
- Yeah.
374
00:19:34,807 --> 00:19:37,719
You know, I think back to
when we first came into this cave,
375
00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,110
and I'm almost
ashamed of my behavior.
376
00:19:40,213 --> 00:19:42,713
- Aww.
- Hey, none of that
talk here, fella.
377
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,887
Oh, no, the monster's back!
378
00:19:50,989 --> 00:19:52,756
I'm afraid!
379
00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,359
We validate your fear!
380
00:19:57,930 --> 00:20:01,332
Yay! This is fun!
381
00:20:01,434 --> 00:20:03,434
Dad, I want you to know,
382
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:06,437
even though we're about
to die, I'm glad I came along!
383
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:10,674
I've learned a lot about myself
and what it means to be a male! Ahh!
384
00:20:11,477 --> 00:20:13,678
- Ahh!
- Me too, son!
385
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:17,948
I've learned it takes a lot of courage
and strength to express your emotions.
386
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:21,452
And I'd like to hug you, but...
387
00:20:21,554 --> 00:20:23,921
I'm paralyzed with fear!
388
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:38,088
- There they are!
- Huh?
389
00:20:38,170 --> 00:20:40,771
- Found 'em.
- Mama!
390
00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:43,473
- Frannie!
- What happened
to the monster?
391
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:44,920
- Monster?
- Huh?
392
00:20:44,944 --> 00:20:47,222
Oh, you mean the guy
that was in our way. Ahh.
393
00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:50,759
Monica took him down with her
tail. The rest of us finished him off.
394
00:20:50,783 --> 00:20:53,116
Yeah?
395
00:20:53,218 --> 00:20:55,230
Mom's out there
gutting him right now.
396
00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:59,056
But enough about him,
sugar, you know what I want.
397
00:20:59,158 --> 00:21:01,692
Fran, have you been drinking?
398
00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:02,659
You bet!
399
00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:04,472
I've got my beer goggles on
400
00:21:04,496 --> 00:21:06,964
and you are lookin' mighty fine.
401
00:21:07,066 --> 00:21:09,166
Now... now, now,
now, just hold on!
402
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,836
You can't just turn me on
and off like a light switch.
403
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:14,338
I'm coming from a very
vulnerable place right now.
404
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:18,075
- Take off your shirt.
- Well, excuse me,
405
00:21:18,177 --> 00:21:20,845
but we are not going to be
reduced to pieces of meat.
406
00:21:20,947 --> 00:21:24,314
I demand that we be recognized
for the other things we have to offer.
407
00:21:24,416 --> 00:21:25,816
Mm-hmm.
408
00:21:25,918 --> 00:21:30,220
- All right, Earl,
I recognize you.
- Thank you.
409
00:21:30,322 --> 00:21:33,290
Now, there's a huge
dead beast out there.
410
00:21:33,393 --> 00:21:37,895
Why don't you take it home, clean
it, cook it, and get it on the table?
411
00:21:37,997 --> 00:21:39,329
And after dinner,
412
00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:43,501
how 'bout you make yourself
nice and pretty for Mama?
413
00:21:44,670 --> 00:21:47,705
- Let's go, Lena.
- Right.
414
00:21:47,807 --> 00:21:51,642
- See you at home, Earl.
- - I'll wait up for you, Sid.
415
00:21:53,346 --> 00:21:55,445
Yeah, well, I
guess she told you.
416
00:21:56,248 --> 00:21:58,448
Oh, I don't know.
417
00:21:58,551 --> 00:22:01,184
Something tells me that
when I get home tonight,
418
00:22:01,286 --> 00:22:04,087
I might just have a headache.
419
00:22:04,189 --> 00:22:05,856
Huh?
420
00:22:05,958 --> 00:22:07,424
Oh.
29720
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