Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,724 --> 00:00:05,034
Well, it looks like
everything'’s in order.
2
00:00:05,103 --> 00:00:07,586
All my chemicals are
perfectly balanced.
3
00:00:07,655 --> 00:00:10,137
Let the cloning begin.
4
00:00:16,965 --> 00:00:19,000
An exact duplicate.
5
00:00:19,068 --> 00:00:20,137
Eureka!
6
00:00:20,206 --> 00:00:21,551
I'’m a genius!
7
00:00:21,620 --> 00:00:23,448
[ Phone ringing]
8
00:00:23,517 --> 00:00:25,862
Probably the nobel committee.
9
00:00:25,931 --> 00:00:27,241
Hello?
10
00:00:27,310 --> 00:00:28,482
Hi, whatcha doing?
11
00:00:28,551 --> 00:00:32,275
Just replicating a sequence
of deoxyribonucleic acid.
12
00:00:32,344 --> 00:00:33,517
You'’re cloning?
13
00:00:33,586 --> 00:00:35,689
Wow, i'’m so proud to
have you as my aunt.
14
00:00:35,758 --> 00:00:37,655
I mean, you'’re
not only brilliant
15
00:00:37,724 --> 00:00:39,275
you'’re beautiful, kind
16
00:00:39,344 --> 00:00:41,758
and you'’re very, very,
very special to me.
17
00:00:41,827 --> 00:00:43,137
How much money do you need?
18
00:00:43,206 --> 00:00:44,344
How much can you clone?
19
00:00:44,413 --> 00:00:45,655
Cloning money is illegal.
20
00:00:45,724 --> 00:00:47,517
But the sky'’s the
limit with produce.
21
00:00:47,586 --> 00:00:49,034
How are you fixed for melons?
22
00:00:49,103 --> 00:00:50,724
Mmm, tomato.
23
00:00:50,793 --> 00:00:55,103
They say the antioxidants
are good for the prostate and...
24
00:00:57,827 --> 00:00:59,862
[ Chuckles]
25
00:00:59,931 --> 00:01:02,000
Huh?
26
00:01:04,517 --> 00:01:10,655
♪ Life'’s changing around me,
and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪
27
00:01:10,724 --> 00:01:17,068
♪ i'’m reaching out and
living by my rules... ♪
28
00:01:17,137 --> 00:01:20,241
♪ Time'’s moving way too fast ♪
29
00:01:20,310 --> 00:01:24,172
♪ I wanna make it last...
30
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:29,896
♪ '’cause i'’m out
on my own now ♪
31
00:01:29,965 --> 00:01:34,620
♪ and I like the way it feels.
32
00:01:40,827 --> 00:01:42,000
Sabrina, i'’m not paying you
33
00:01:42,068 --> 00:01:43,827
to make goo-goo
eyes at the customers.
34
00:01:43,896 --> 00:01:45,620
Oh, i'’ve been
meaning to bring that up
35
00:01:45,689 --> 00:01:46,758
at a staff meeting.
36
00:01:46,827 --> 00:01:48,413
Hey, it'’s not my
fault you never
37
00:01:48,482 --> 00:01:50,068
get to spend any time with Josh.
38
00:01:50,137 --> 00:01:51,655
Who told him to leave his job
39
00:01:51,724 --> 00:01:54,448
at the coffeehouse to go work
at some dead-end newspaper?
40
00:01:54,517 --> 00:01:56,379
Okay, I got to go, Sabrina.
41
00:01:56,448 --> 00:01:58,103
The "dead-end newspaper"
42
00:01:58,172 --> 00:02:00,758
is sending me to
photograph the pope.
43
00:02:00,827 --> 00:02:03,724
Yeah, but does the
paper give you free lattes?
44
00:02:03,793 --> 00:02:05,137
He didn'’t get
that here, either.
45
00:02:05,206 --> 00:02:06,966
Listen, Mike'’s giving
me Wednesday night off
46
00:02:07,034 --> 00:02:08,379
and I promise,
we'’ll be together.
47
00:02:08,448 --> 00:02:09,551
Wednesday sounds good.
48
00:02:09,620 --> 00:02:11,275
Wednesday it is.
49
00:02:11,344 --> 00:02:13,655
Bye-bye!
50
00:02:13,724 --> 00:02:16,000
Harvey, what happened to you?
51
00:02:16,068 --> 00:02:18,068
Just a little hockey injury.
52
00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:19,586
Which he got while scoring
53
00:02:19,655 --> 00:02:21,965
the game-winning
goal for Boston college.
54
00:02:22,034 --> 00:02:23,758
Harvey'’s the star of the team.
55
00:02:23,827 --> 00:02:26,068
And i'’m the star'’s girlfriend.
56
00:02:26,137 --> 00:02:28,586
And i'’m going to hurl.
I'’ll see you Wednesday.
57
00:02:28,655 --> 00:02:30,838
We'’ll do whatever you want.
I Don'’t care what it costs.
58
00:02:30,862 --> 00:02:32,462
Oh, you Don'’t have
to spend a cent on me
59
00:02:32,517 --> 00:02:33,597
as long as we'’re together.
60
00:02:33,655 --> 00:02:35,103
That'’s a sentence
61
00:02:35,172 --> 00:02:38,310
you will never,
ever hear me say.
62
00:02:38,379 --> 00:02:41,862
Hey, Sabrina, can I
talk to you for a minute?
63
00:02:41,931 --> 00:02:43,206
Sure, what'’s up?
64
00:02:43,275 --> 00:02:44,310
I need your help.
65
00:02:44,379 --> 00:02:46,068
This ankle injury'’s
pretty serious.
66
00:02:46,137 --> 00:02:47,620
I'’m afraid if coach finds out
67
00:02:47,689 --> 00:02:49,827
i'’ll wind up on the
bench for the season.
68
00:02:49,896 --> 00:02:52,724
Well, i'’m not an
orthopedic surgeon, Harvey
69
00:02:52,793 --> 00:02:54,896
but, hey, if
you'’re up for it...
70
00:02:54,965 --> 00:02:56,103
Actually, I was hoping
71
00:02:56,172 --> 00:02:58,000
that you could
do that thing that...
72
00:02:58,068 --> 00:02:59,172
That only you can do?
73
00:02:59,241 --> 00:03:01,172
Turn the world on with my smile?
74
00:03:01,241 --> 00:03:02,586
Oh, wait, that'’s Mary.
75
00:03:02,655 --> 00:03:05,413
I'’m talking about magic.
76
00:03:05,482 --> 00:03:06,793
Sabrina, i'’m desperate.
77
00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:08,586
We'’ve got a big game coming up
78
00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:10,379
and the team'’s counting on me.
79
00:03:10,448 --> 00:03:11,448
Harvey, i'’m not allowed
80
00:03:11,517 --> 00:03:13,034
to give my magic
away to mortals.
81
00:03:13,103 --> 00:03:14,206
I'’m a witch, not a genie.
82
00:03:14,275 --> 00:03:15,620
Oh.
83
00:03:15,689 --> 00:03:17,724
You wouldn'’t happen to
know any genies, would you?
84
00:03:17,793 --> 00:03:20,103
Only one, but she'’s
having a little problem
85
00:03:20,172 --> 00:03:22,310
with the bottle, if
you catch my drift.
86
00:03:22,379 --> 00:03:24,310
Sorry, Harvey,
my fingers are tied.
87
00:03:24,379 --> 00:03:26,551
Well, it was worth a shot.
88
00:03:26,620 --> 00:03:28,420
But i'’ll tell you what,
if you go see a doctor
89
00:03:28,482 --> 00:03:30,655
and get it taken care of, I
promise i'’ll be at the game
90
00:03:30,724 --> 00:03:32,604
and i'’ll bring everyone
I know to cheer you on.
91
00:03:32,655 --> 00:03:33,655
That would be great.
92
00:03:33,689 --> 00:03:34,862
See you Wednesday night.
93
00:03:34,931 --> 00:03:36,517
Wednesday night.
94
00:03:36,586 --> 00:03:38,827
I'’m sure Josh won'’t
mind spending our date
95
00:03:38,896 --> 00:03:40,413
cheering on my ex-boyfriend.
96
00:03:42,034 --> 00:03:43,862
My first night off in two weeks
97
00:03:43,931 --> 00:03:46,655
and i'’m supposed to
cheer on your ex-boyfriend?
98
00:03:46,724 --> 00:03:48,068
I hardly even know Harvey.
99
00:03:48,137 --> 00:03:50,413
I hate hockey, and she
still dragged me here.
100
00:03:50,482 --> 00:03:51,758
I'’ve got bigger problems.
101
00:03:51,827 --> 00:03:52,965
Every sporting event I go to
102
00:03:53,034 --> 00:03:54,482
I get hit in the
head by something.
103
00:03:54,551 --> 00:03:55,551
There can be
104
00:03:55,586 --> 00:03:56,862
60,000 people in a stadium
105
00:03:56,931 --> 00:03:58,551
and no matter where i'’m sitting
106
00:03:58,620 --> 00:04:00,655
the puck or the ball...
Or the matador...
107
00:04:00,724 --> 00:04:02,896
Comes flying up and
hits me in the head.
108
00:04:02,965 --> 00:04:04,172
Will you shut up already?
109
00:04:04,241 --> 00:04:05,931
Although, it usually
doesn'’t kick in
110
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,517
until the game actually begins.
111
00:04:07,586 --> 00:04:08,586
Guys, stop complaining.
112
00:04:08,655 --> 00:04:10,172
Harvey'’s playing
through an injury
113
00:04:10,241 --> 00:04:11,551
and we'’re here to support him.
114
00:04:11,620 --> 00:04:13,896
Yeah, anything for
your ex-boyfriend.
115
00:04:13,965 --> 00:04:16,620
Who happens to be
my current boyfriend.
116
00:04:16,689 --> 00:04:18,862
I'’m dating number ten.
117
00:04:18,931 --> 00:04:20,310
He'’s the star.
118
00:04:20,379 --> 00:04:22,206
Two salems can drive
119
00:04:22,275 --> 00:04:24,482
ninny and the
professor twice as crazy
120
00:04:24,551 --> 00:04:26,551
and we can be
kings of this castle.
121
00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:28,241
You'’ve got beauty and brains
122
00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:30,206
which means, so do I.
123
00:04:32,379 --> 00:04:33,620
Hmm...
124
00:04:33,689 --> 00:04:35,137
Salem, what have you done?
125
00:04:35,206 --> 00:04:36,551
Me? Nothing.
126
00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:38,620
I'’ve just been sitting here
127
00:04:38,689 --> 00:04:41,241
grooming myself,
as cats will do.
128
00:04:41,310 --> 00:04:42,379
Hmm...
129
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:44,172
Must'’ve been the wind.
130
00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:46,482
I think you owe me an apology.
131
00:04:46,551 --> 00:04:48,103
I'’m sorry, Salem.
132
00:04:48,172 --> 00:04:50,034
I'’ll let it go this time.
133
00:04:50,103 --> 00:04:52,517
Wait a minute.
134
00:04:52,586 --> 00:04:54,379
What wind?
135
00:04:54,448 --> 00:04:56,413
This could be the beginning
136
00:04:56,482 --> 00:04:58,379
of a beautiful friendship.
137
00:04:58,448 --> 00:05:00,655
I like the way I think.
138
00:05:00,724 --> 00:05:02,034
Oh, there goes Harvey!
139
00:05:02,103 --> 00:05:03,965
He'’s driving toward the goal!
140
00:05:06,103 --> 00:05:08,344
And he gets the
puck stolen from him.
141
00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:09,586
Thief!
142
00:05:11,068 --> 00:05:13,275
Oh, there goes Harvey!
143
00:05:13,344 --> 00:05:14,172
He'’s wide open!
144
00:05:14,241 --> 00:05:15,517
He'’s getting ready to shoot!
145
00:05:18,034 --> 00:05:19,862
And he trips and falls... again.
146
00:05:19,931 --> 00:05:22,586
The beauty of ice is
that after you fall on it
147
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:25,068
you can use it to bring
down the swelling.
148
00:05:25,137 --> 00:05:26,137
Oh, he'’s back up!
149
00:05:26,206 --> 00:05:27,344
You know what they say...
150
00:05:27,413 --> 00:05:28,862
You can'’t keep a good man down.
151
00:05:28,931 --> 00:05:30,034
Ooh! Or kinkle up.
152
00:05:30,103 --> 00:05:32,275
This is so humiliating.
153
00:05:32,344 --> 00:05:33,896
Oh, Harvey'’ll bounce back.
154
00:05:33,965 --> 00:05:34,896
I meant for me.
155
00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:35,965
I'’m his girlfriend.
156
00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:39,137
It looks like the
coach is benching him.
157
00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:41,965
Wow, i'’ve never seen
anyone fall off the bench before.
158
00:05:42,034 --> 00:05:44,793
Let'’s hope they keep him
benched for the rest of the season.
159
00:05:46,206 --> 00:05:48,275
This is exactly what
Harvey was afraid of.
160
00:05:48,344 --> 00:05:50,689
Hey, kinkle! You stinkle!
161
00:05:52,068 --> 00:05:54,862
Oh, man, even i'’m
feeling sorry for the guy.
162
00:05:54,931 --> 00:05:56,172
Oh, poor Harvey.
163
00:05:56,241 --> 00:05:57,586
I just Don'’t understand.
164
00:05:57,655 --> 00:06:00,517
I mean, just last week
he was skating like a god.
165
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:04,241
Skating? God?
166
00:06:04,310 --> 00:06:05,586
That'’s it.
167
00:06:05,655 --> 00:06:06,586
Uh, i'’ll be right back.
168
00:06:06,655 --> 00:06:08,482
I'’ve got to get more
relish for my sausage.
169
00:06:08,551 --> 00:06:10,034
I'’ll get it for you.
No, no, no, no!
170
00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,241
I am very particular about
the relish on my sausage.
171
00:06:12,310 --> 00:06:14,655
If there'’s too much relish,
it can overpower a sausage.
172
00:06:14,724 --> 00:06:17,206
If there'’s not enough,
it can... underpower it.
173
00:06:17,275 --> 00:06:19,586
Do you give this much
thought to all your condiments?
174
00:06:19,655 --> 00:06:21,931
Don'’t get me started
on horseradish.
175
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:23,275
I know what she means.
176
00:06:23,344 --> 00:06:25,448
I'’m convinced the cause
of my uncle buddy'’s death
177
00:06:25,517 --> 00:06:26,448
was aunt may'’s relish.
178
00:06:26,517 --> 00:06:28,344
Not that uncle buddy
didn'’t have it coming.
179
00:06:28,413 --> 00:06:30,137
Thank you!
180
00:06:31,275 --> 00:06:32,310
Hi, Mercury, i'’m...
181
00:06:32,379 --> 00:06:34,034
Eh, eh, eh...
182
00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:36,137
Now, i'’m sorry about
your late delivery, Minerva
183
00:06:36,206 --> 00:06:38,517
but the traffic around mount
Olympus is a nightmare.
184
00:06:38,586 --> 00:06:40,517
[ Sarcastic chuckle]
185
00:06:40,586 --> 00:06:42,206
She may be the goddess of wisdom
186
00:06:42,275 --> 00:06:44,620
but she has got a mouth
like a chariot driver.
187
00:06:44,689 --> 00:06:46,620
I'’m sorry to bother
you, but my ex-boyfriend
188
00:06:46,689 --> 00:06:48,482
is playing in a big
hockey game right now
189
00:06:48,551 --> 00:06:49,631
and he'’s got this ankle injury
190
00:06:49,655 --> 00:06:50,700
and the coach has benched him
191
00:06:50,724 --> 00:06:51,907
and I was wondering if you had
192
00:06:51,931 --> 00:06:53,734
a pair of really fast ice
skates I could borrow.
193
00:06:53,758 --> 00:06:56,758
And you are the goddess
of what, run-on sentences?
194
00:06:56,827 --> 00:06:58,827
Actually, i'’m not a
goddess... I'’m a witch.
195
00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:00,827
Well, actually,
half-witch, half-mortal.
196
00:07:00,896 --> 00:07:02,275
Well, how about those skates?
197
00:07:02,344 --> 00:07:03,758
I only have one pair.
198
00:07:03,827 --> 00:07:05,965
I'’ve never lent
them out before.
199
00:07:06,034 --> 00:07:09,000
Well... you can have
them for three virgins.
200
00:07:09,068 --> 00:07:10,310
Oh, and a goat.
201
00:07:10,379 --> 00:07:11,827
Would you settle for
202
00:07:11,896 --> 00:07:15,034
a foot-long Polish
sausage with extra kraut?
203
00:07:15,103 --> 00:07:18,586
Oh, you found my achilles heel!
204
00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:20,827
That'’s the one thing
you can'’t get up here.
205
00:07:20,896 --> 00:07:24,103
Oh, just be sure and bring
them back within 24 hours.
206
00:07:24,172 --> 00:07:25,931
Oh, well, that'’s how
long it should take
207
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,551
for that sausage
to back up on you.
208
00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:33,034
Harvey, put these on.
209
00:07:33,103 --> 00:07:34,241
Where'’d these come from?
210
00:07:34,310 --> 00:07:35,551
Don'’t ask questions.
211
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:36,724
Just do as I say.
212
00:07:36,793 --> 00:07:39,206
Suddenly I feel like
we'’re dating again.
213
00:07:39,275 --> 00:07:41,655
I need these back first thing
tomorrow morning, got it?
214
00:07:41,724 --> 00:07:42,896
Got it, thanks.
215
00:07:44,310 --> 00:07:45,827
I knew I could count on you.
216
00:07:45,896 --> 00:07:47,103
You are the greatest.
217
00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,620
Whoa.
218
00:07:50,689 --> 00:07:52,103
I thought you were
somebody else.
219
00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:53,310
Really sorry.
220
00:07:53,379 --> 00:07:55,827
Want to get some
coffee after the game?
221
00:08:00,448 --> 00:08:03,206
Wayne is really going to
love my impromptu little dinner.
222
00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:05,206
Don'’t you think the
president of the college
223
00:08:05,275 --> 00:08:06,931
deserves something
a little classier
224
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,344
than Bologna and ding dongs?
225
00:08:09,413 --> 00:08:11,344
Did you not notice
the cheez whiz?
226
00:08:11,413 --> 00:08:13,689
I stand corrected.
227
00:08:13,758 --> 00:08:16,551
So, you and Zelda'’s boss?
228
00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:20,482
Frankly, if I were Zelda,
i'’d be a wee bit upset.
229
00:08:20,551 --> 00:08:23,137
If you were Zelda,
i'’d be suicidal.
230
00:08:23,206 --> 00:08:24,310
There, all done.
231
00:08:24,379 --> 00:08:25,724
I just have to run upstairs
232
00:08:25,793 --> 00:08:27,758
and get a blanket
for us to snuggle on.
233
00:08:27,827 --> 00:08:30,034
Oh, what was I thinking?
234
00:08:30,103 --> 00:08:31,793
There'’s no way i'’m
leaving you alone here
235
00:08:31,862 --> 00:08:32,896
with all this food.
236
00:08:32,965 --> 00:08:34,793
[ Sobbing]
237
00:08:42,413 --> 00:08:43,620
Hilda?
238
00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:47,965
Oh, my goodness!
239
00:08:48,034 --> 00:08:51,137
It looks like we'’ve been
pillaged by the huns again.
240
00:08:51,206 --> 00:08:53,931
Zelda spellman, how could you?
241
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,793
How could I what?
242
00:08:55,862 --> 00:08:58,413
Just because you'’re jealous
because i'’m dating your boss
243
00:08:58,482 --> 00:09:01,172
doesn'’t give you the right to
destroy my romantic dinner.
244
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:04,758
Obviously this was the work
of a fiendish four-legged feline.
245
00:09:04,827 --> 00:09:06,379
I Don'’t think so, Zelda.
246
00:09:06,448 --> 00:09:08,586
Salem was with
me the whole time.
247
00:09:08,655 --> 00:09:11,551
I can'’t believe you think I
would do something so petty
248
00:09:11,620 --> 00:09:15,758
just because i'’m jealous,
which I absolutely am not.
249
00:09:15,827 --> 00:09:18,689
For once in your 658 years
250
00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:20,793
will you own up to
your real feelings?
251
00:09:20,862 --> 00:09:23,068
All right, you want
real feeling, sister?
252
00:09:23,137 --> 00:09:24,379
I'’ll give you real feelings.
253
00:09:24,448 --> 00:09:26,448
I think president
banning is out of his mind
254
00:09:26,517 --> 00:09:27,655
to be going out with you.
255
00:09:27,724 --> 00:09:29,206
Oh, yeah? Well, who asked you?
256
00:09:29,275 --> 00:09:30,000
You did!
257
00:09:30,068 --> 00:09:31,620
Sure, throw that in my face.
258
00:09:31,689 --> 00:09:34,000
Oh, no, missy, you
opened up this can of worms
259
00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:35,551
and we'’re going to finish it!
260
00:09:35,620 --> 00:09:37,793
[ Chewing loudly]
261
00:09:37,862 --> 00:09:41,000
Now that'’s entertainment, hmm?
262
00:09:42,793 --> 00:09:44,275
Announcer: Goal
for Boston college!
263
00:09:44,344 --> 00:09:46,464
Ladies and gentlemen, a
new single game scoring record
264
00:09:46,517 --> 00:09:47,877
has just been set
by Harvey kinkle!
265
00:09:47,931 --> 00:09:49,965
That'’s my boyfriend!
266
00:09:50,034 --> 00:09:51,241
All: We know!
267
00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:53,862
I'’ve never seen someone
skate so fast before.
268
00:09:53,931 --> 00:09:56,551
Call me crazy, but I
think he'’s really flying.
269
00:09:56,620 --> 00:09:57,665
Oh, no, no! He'’s just jazzed
270
00:09:57,689 --> 00:09:59,286
because we all showed
up to cheer him on!
271
00:09:59,310 --> 00:10:00,862
You know, he
never played like this
272
00:10:00,931 --> 00:10:02,137
before I was his girlfriend.
273
00:10:05,344 --> 00:10:06,793
Yeah, well, if
you'’re his girlfriend
274
00:10:06,862 --> 00:10:07,931
why is he waving at mine?
275
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,655
Oh, he'’s not waving at me.
276
00:10:09,724 --> 00:10:12,103
He'’s just... trying
to get the vendor.
277
00:10:12,172 --> 00:10:13,896
Uh, get that guy some nuts!
278
00:10:18,793 --> 00:10:19,965
Hi, Harvey.
279
00:10:20,034 --> 00:10:22,103
Still flying high after
last night'’s game?
280
00:10:22,172 --> 00:10:23,896
It was the most
exciting night of my life
281
00:10:23,965 --> 00:10:25,034
and I owe it all to you.
282
00:10:25,103 --> 00:10:26,793
Oh, what are friends for?
283
00:10:26,862 --> 00:10:28,907
I mean, i'’m sure you would'’ve
done the same thing for me.
284
00:10:28,931 --> 00:10:30,044
You know, if you were a witch.
285
00:10:30,068 --> 00:10:32,068
I brought you a little present.
286
00:10:32,137 --> 00:10:34,655
Oh, it'’s beautiful!
287
00:10:34,724 --> 00:10:36,620
But you really didn'’t
have to get me anything.
288
00:10:36,689 --> 00:10:39,517
Oh, yes, I did.
289
00:10:39,586 --> 00:10:40,931
The coach was so impressed
290
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,620
with my performance last night
291
00:10:42,689 --> 00:10:44,482
he took the skates
from my locker
292
00:10:44,551 --> 00:10:46,172
and secretly had them bronzed.
293
00:10:46,241 --> 00:10:47,448
It'’s a real honor.
294
00:10:47,517 --> 00:10:49,068
It'’s a real disaster
is what it is.
295
00:10:49,137 --> 00:10:50,827
I borrowed these
skates from Mercury
296
00:10:50,896 --> 00:10:53,413
and the last thing you want
to do is make a god angry.
297
00:10:53,482 --> 00:10:56,551
Wow, I was wearing
a god'’s skates?
298
00:10:56,620 --> 00:10:58,172
That is so cool.
299
00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,551
Okay, I Don'’t think you
get what'’s at stake here.
300
00:11:00,620 --> 00:11:03,103
Um, does the name prometheus
mean anything to you?
301
00:11:03,172 --> 00:11:06,241
He'’s the guy who
stole fire from Zeus.
302
00:11:06,310 --> 00:11:08,413
And wound up chained
to a rock for all eternity
303
00:11:08,482 --> 00:11:10,103
with vultures
pecking out his liver!
304
00:11:10,172 --> 00:11:12,000
We'’ve got to get those
skates out of there!
305
00:11:14,137 --> 00:11:16,034
Wait! No need to
destroy school property.
306
00:11:19,517 --> 00:11:21,517
I keep forgetting
you can do that.
307
00:11:21,586 --> 00:11:23,551
Now the important
part: UN-bronzing them.
308
00:11:28,172 --> 00:11:30,275
Well, so much for
saving school property.
309
00:11:30,344 --> 00:11:31,620
What are we going to do?
310
00:11:31,689 --> 00:11:33,931
All I know is, no bird
is getting near my liver!
311
00:11:39,517 --> 00:11:40,620
They'’re bronzed!
312
00:11:40,689 --> 00:11:42,103
Consider it a gift.
313
00:11:42,172 --> 00:11:44,137
You Don'’t have to thank me.
314
00:11:44,206 --> 00:11:46,931
I won'’t, because I have
no use for bronzed skates.
315
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,827
Can'’t you just unbronze them?
316
00:11:48,896 --> 00:11:49,655
Could you?
317
00:11:49,724 --> 00:11:50,764
No, but i'’m just a witch.
318
00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:51,793
You'’re a god.
319
00:11:51,827 --> 00:11:54,724
Have you ever heard
of a god of UN-bronzing?
320
00:11:54,793 --> 00:11:56,620
Isn'’t he the one who
brought us sunscreen?
321
00:11:56,689 --> 00:11:58,379
Look, blondie,
you'’re in big trouble.
322
00:11:58,448 --> 00:12:00,000
You ruined my
only pair of skates
323
00:12:00,068 --> 00:12:02,655
and now you'’re going to
have to pay the consequences.
324
00:12:02,724 --> 00:12:04,344
No, please Don'’t
peck out my liver.
325
00:12:04,413 --> 00:12:05,551
I have midterms in two weeks
326
00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:07,793
and it'’s really hard to
study without a vital organ.
327
00:12:07,862 --> 00:12:08,758
Save it for Zeus.
328
00:12:08,827 --> 00:12:10,027
Punishments are his specialty.
329
00:12:10,068 --> 00:12:13,034
Dottie, can you get Zeus for me?
330
00:12:17,275 --> 00:12:19,517
Thanks, dottie, and
i'’ll need another desk.
331
00:12:20,931 --> 00:12:22,551
Who am I punishing today?
332
00:12:22,620 --> 00:12:24,724
Her. I loaned her
my only pair of skates
333
00:12:24,793 --> 00:12:25,793
and she ruined them.
334
00:12:25,862 --> 00:12:26,793
It was an accident.
335
00:12:26,862 --> 00:12:27,793
You see, I borrowed them
336
00:12:27,862 --> 00:12:29,689
for my ex-boyfriend.
We have a lot of history.
337
00:12:29,758 --> 00:12:31,275
Anyway, his team
was losing the game
338
00:12:31,344 --> 00:12:32,413
and he was injured, so...
339
00:12:32,482 --> 00:12:34,034
Quiet!
340
00:12:35,275 --> 00:12:37,517
And that'’s why he
gets paid the big bucks.
341
00:12:37,586 --> 00:12:40,310
Young lady, destroying
the property of a god
342
00:12:40,379 --> 00:12:41,724
is a serious offense.
343
00:12:41,793 --> 00:12:46,068
And it is my
pleasure... I mean, duty
344
00:12:46,137 --> 00:12:48,413
to come up with an
appropriate punishment.
345
00:12:48,482 --> 00:12:50,310
Um, I Don'’t mean
to be pushy, Zeus
346
00:12:50,379 --> 00:12:52,862
but isn'’t it also
the duty of a god...
347
00:12:52,931 --> 00:12:55,206
Especially you,
the king of gods...
348
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,310
To be merciful?
349
00:12:56,379 --> 00:12:57,965
Mercy'’s a wonderful concept
350
00:12:58,034 --> 00:13:00,689
but I find it gets in
the way of punishment.
351
00:13:00,758 --> 00:13:02,551
Since i'’m the injured party...
352
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:04,482
Oh, oh... Uh, great god of gods.
353
00:13:04,551 --> 00:13:06,241
May I be so bold as to suggest
354
00:13:06,310 --> 00:13:08,827
that she make all my
deliveries for a month?
355
00:13:08,896 --> 00:13:11,310
Well, I suppose that
would be more fitting than...
356
00:13:11,379 --> 00:13:13,068
Throwing her in a pit
357
00:13:13,137 --> 00:13:16,448
and letting the
wildebeests feast on her?
358
00:13:16,517 --> 00:13:18,000
Way more fitting.
359
00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:23,517
Would it kill him to use
a door once in a while?
360
00:13:25,965 --> 00:13:27,137
I understand the shoes
361
00:13:27,206 --> 00:13:29,344
but do I have to
wear this hideous hat?
362
00:13:29,413 --> 00:13:31,206
It was a birthday
gift from Zeus'’s wife.
363
00:13:31,275 --> 00:13:32,896
I love it.
364
00:13:32,965 --> 00:13:33,965
Here'’s your beeper.
365
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,482
And deliver this
package to Apollo.
366
00:13:36,551 --> 00:13:37,896
Is this the only one?
367
00:13:37,965 --> 00:13:39,965
No. It'’s the only
one I could lift.
368
00:13:43,034 --> 00:13:43,896
[ Sighs]
369
00:13:43,965 --> 00:13:45,379
If anyone needs me
370
00:13:45,448 --> 00:13:48,655
i'’ll be snorkeling
at club med Atlantis.
371
00:13:48,724 --> 00:13:51,931
And i'’ll be here drowning
in a sea of cardboard.
372
00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:58,758
Package for Mr. Narcissus?
373
00:13:58,827 --> 00:14:00,310
Sign here, please.
374
00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:29,689
Okay, i'’ve got to write
the psychology paper
375
00:14:29,758 --> 00:14:31,068
and then i'’ve got to deliver
376
00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:32,965
this mother'’s day
basket from oedipus.
377
00:14:33,034 --> 00:14:36,275
Hmm, if only I could
write about that.
378
00:14:36,344 --> 00:14:38,724
Pan? Pan?
379
00:14:38,793 --> 00:14:39,896
Pan!
380
00:14:39,965 --> 00:14:42,758
Message from your
condo association:
381
00:14:42,827 --> 00:14:45,068
"Learn a new freakin'’ song."
382
00:14:45,137 --> 00:14:46,448
Hey, Don'’t shoot the messenger!
383
00:14:49,517 --> 00:14:51,586
Josh: Sorry I missed you again.
384
00:14:51,655 --> 00:14:54,068
You know, your
phone also dials out.
385
00:14:54,137 --> 00:14:55,931
Josh? Josh, wait!
386
00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:57,620
Hello?
387
00:14:57,689 --> 00:15:00,689
[ Pager beeping]
388
00:15:00,758 --> 00:15:03,275
"And wear flippers"?
389
00:15:03,344 --> 00:15:04,689
Now, what'’s that about?
390
00:15:14,034 --> 00:15:16,448
Oops. My mistake.
391
00:15:24,931 --> 00:15:26,620
Josh, what are you doing here?
392
00:15:26,689 --> 00:15:28,896
I just wanted to see
what'’s up with you.
393
00:15:28,965 --> 00:15:31,172
I mean, whenever I
call, you'’re never...
394
00:15:31,241 --> 00:15:32,379
What are you wearing?
395
00:15:32,448 --> 00:15:34,034
Is that seaweed in your hair?
396
00:15:34,103 --> 00:15:35,379
Oh, i'’m going for a new look.
397
00:15:35,448 --> 00:15:37,896
I'’m sorry I haven'’t called
you. It'’s been a god-awful week.
398
00:15:37,965 --> 00:15:39,206
Hey, i'’m busy, too, all right?
399
00:15:39,275 --> 00:15:41,241
But at least I find time
to return your calls.
400
00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:42,241
We haven'’t talked
401
00:15:42,310 --> 00:15:44,068
since you dragged
me to Harvey'’s game.
402
00:15:44,137 --> 00:15:45,941
Sabrina, is there something
going on with you two
403
00:15:45,965 --> 00:15:47,137
you'’re not telling me about?
404
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:49,793
Josh, you know that'’s not true.
Why would you even think that?
405
00:15:49,862 --> 00:15:51,000
[ Knocking]
406
00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:54,655
Hey, Sabrina
407
00:15:54,724 --> 00:15:56,620
just wanted to thank
you again for last night.
408
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:57,689
Oh, Harvey, not now.
409
00:15:57,758 --> 00:16:00,758
Hey, Josh, didn'’t
see you there.
410
00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:01,827
Obviously.
411
00:16:01,862 --> 00:16:03,068
Um, I can explain.
412
00:16:03,137 --> 00:16:04,655
[ Pager beeping]
413
00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:06,379
Uh, as soon as I get back.
414
00:16:06,448 --> 00:16:08,344
Got to go.
415
00:16:08,413 --> 00:16:11,620
Girl can wear
anything, can'’t she?
416
00:16:11,689 --> 00:16:12,862
You have been jealous of me
417
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:14,655
since the day I came
out of the womb.
418
00:16:14,724 --> 00:16:15,965
How can I be jealous of you
419
00:16:16,034 --> 00:16:17,344
when you have nothing I want?
420
00:16:17,413 --> 00:16:19,310
Except the president
of your college.
421
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:21,172
I do not want president banning.
422
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:23,172
I do, however, want
the Pearl earrings
423
00:16:23,241 --> 00:16:25,862
which were stolen from
my jewelry box this morning.
424
00:16:25,931 --> 00:16:27,517
Are you accusing me of stealing?
425
00:16:27,586 --> 00:16:29,206
I'’m merely saying
that they are missing
426
00:16:29,275 --> 00:16:30,862
and you'’re the only
one in the house.
427
00:16:30,931 --> 00:16:32,068
I Don'’t know which is worse
428
00:16:32,137 --> 00:16:34,275
you thinking that I would
steal your Pearl earrings
429
00:16:34,344 --> 00:16:36,344
or you thinking that I
would actually wear them.
430
00:16:36,413 --> 00:16:37,862
Do I look like
Sandra day o'’connor?
431
00:16:40,068 --> 00:16:42,137
The stealing'’s a nice touch.
432
00:16:42,206 --> 00:16:45,758
Nothing you wouldn'’t
have thought of yourself.
433
00:16:45,827 --> 00:16:48,241
And may I say you look stunning?
434
00:16:48,310 --> 00:16:50,379
Pearls and basic black?
435
00:16:50,448 --> 00:16:52,413
A timeless classic.
436
00:16:52,482 --> 00:16:53,758
I am getting out of here.
437
00:16:53,827 --> 00:16:55,310
I can'’t stand this anymore.
438
00:16:55,379 --> 00:16:56,310
Oh, and I can?
439
00:16:56,379 --> 00:16:58,068
Fine. If you'’re taking the car
440
00:16:58,137 --> 00:16:59,551
drop me at my
president'’s house.
441
00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:00,724
I will not!
442
00:17:00,793 --> 00:17:02,793
Fine. Then i'’m taking the car.
443
00:17:02,862 --> 00:17:03,862
Fine. Then drop me
444
00:17:03,931 --> 00:17:05,965
at my younger, better-looking
boyfriend'’s house.
445
00:17:06,034 --> 00:17:11,000
Fine. But i'’m not
slowing down the car.
446
00:17:11,068 --> 00:17:13,103
[ Both chuckle]
447
00:17:13,172 --> 00:17:14,413
[ Music playing]
448
00:17:14,482 --> 00:17:18,448
Just like you to
forget your keys.
449
00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:21,827
[ Music stops]
450
00:17:21,896 --> 00:17:22,896
Both: Hey!
451
00:17:22,931 --> 00:17:24,448
Ever hear the expression
452
00:17:24,517 --> 00:17:26,586
"double your pleasure,
double your fun"?
453
00:17:26,655 --> 00:17:27,965
Ever hear the expression
454
00:17:28,034 --> 00:17:29,379
"you'’re in deep doo-doo"?
455
00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:31,137
[ Both groan]
456
00:17:32,448 --> 00:17:34,103
Cool hat. Could you
get me one of those?
457
00:17:34,172 --> 00:17:35,655
Uh, no. Where'’s Josh?
458
00:17:35,724 --> 00:17:36,724
He left.
459
00:17:36,758 --> 00:17:38,551
I'’m afraid he'’s upset with me.
460
00:17:38,620 --> 00:17:39,793
You think he knows
461
00:17:39,862 --> 00:17:42,206
we have all these
secrets between us?
462
00:17:42,275 --> 00:17:43,941
Oh, you mean, like,
that you know i'’m a witch
463
00:17:43,965 --> 00:17:46,079
and I lent you magical skates
and now i'’m moonlighting
464
00:17:46,103 --> 00:17:47,241
as a messenger for Mercury?
465
00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:48,620
Yeah, that.
466
00:17:48,689 --> 00:17:50,241
I should probably go talk to him
467
00:17:50,310 --> 00:17:52,344
but i'’ve got to go
to rite aid for Apollo.
468
00:17:52,413 --> 00:17:54,482
You know, you'’d think
he'’d be able to find
469
00:17:54,551 --> 00:17:56,068
some grecian formula in Greece.
470
00:17:56,137 --> 00:17:58,517
Hey, this whole
thing is my fault.
471
00:17:58,586 --> 00:18:01,103
Is there any way
at all I can help?
472
00:18:01,172 --> 00:18:03,137
Not unless you
can figure out a way
473
00:18:03,206 --> 00:18:04,793
I can be in two places at once.
474
00:18:04,862 --> 00:18:06,068
You'’re a genius, Harvey.
475
00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,551
Never see that coming.
476
00:18:13,103 --> 00:18:15,241
Both: I'’m telling
you it was his idea!
477
00:18:15,310 --> 00:18:16,241
I'’m innocent!
478
00:18:16,310 --> 00:18:18,000
You shut up! No, you shut up!
479
00:18:18,068 --> 00:18:19,068
Both: You shut up!
480
00:18:19,137 --> 00:18:20,137
Both: You both shut up!
481
00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:21,724
This is scary.
482
00:18:21,793 --> 00:18:22,931
Hello, Sabrina.
483
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,931
What are you doing here?
484
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,379
You know your cloning machine?
485
00:18:26,448 --> 00:18:28,793
Obviously Salem
does. I need to borrow it.
486
00:18:28,862 --> 00:18:29,965
Too late.
487
00:18:30,034 --> 00:18:31,758
We just smashed
it to smithereens.
488
00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:33,482
This is so not my day.
489
00:18:33,551 --> 00:18:34,551
[ Pager beeps]
490
00:18:34,586 --> 00:18:37,068
Does everyone in the
world but me have a beeper?
491
00:18:37,137 --> 00:18:38,965
This actually
belongs to Mercury.
492
00:18:39,034 --> 00:18:40,793
Mercury? Didn'’t
you used to date him?
493
00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:41,862
Don'’t remind me.
494
00:18:41,931 --> 00:18:43,517
When he took off those sandals
495
00:18:43,586 --> 00:18:45,137
ugh, talk about a mood killer.
496
00:18:45,206 --> 00:18:46,965
I have to do all his
work for a month
497
00:18:47,034 --> 00:18:48,931
'’cause I ruined his
only pair of skates.
498
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,379
Only pair of skates?
499
00:18:51,448 --> 00:18:55,034
I give you Mercury'’s closet.
500
00:18:55,103 --> 00:18:57,965
Complete with an entire
section devoted to skates.
501
00:18:58,034 --> 00:19:00,310
Whoa. How did you
know these were here?
502
00:19:00,379 --> 00:19:04,000
You think i'’d date a guy without
snooping through his closets?
503
00:19:04,068 --> 00:19:06,586
Hey, my pink pumps.
504
00:19:06,655 --> 00:19:08,482
They look nice with wings.
505
00:19:08,551 --> 00:19:09,551
Sabrina, hilda
506
00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:10,862
what are you doing here?
507
00:19:10,931 --> 00:19:13,448
You picked the wrong
witch'’s niece to pick on.
508
00:19:14,413 --> 00:19:15,689
Yeah, you'’re busted, flyboy.
509
00:19:15,758 --> 00:19:18,241
Why did you tell me you
only had one pair of skates?
510
00:19:18,310 --> 00:19:21,275
'’cause he'’s a lazy,
conniving, pink pump pilferer
511
00:19:21,344 --> 00:19:25,379
who still hasn'’t
discovered odor eaters.
512
00:19:25,448 --> 00:19:26,379
I'’ll tell you one thing.
513
00:19:26,448 --> 00:19:28,148
Zeus is going to have a
great time punishing you
514
00:19:28,172 --> 00:19:29,665
when he finds out
about your little scam.
515
00:19:29,689 --> 00:19:30,689
Yeah.
516
00:19:30,758 --> 00:19:32,655
Hey, there'’s no reason
we can'’t keep this
517
00:19:32,724 --> 00:19:33,862
amongst the three of us.
518
00:19:36,965 --> 00:19:40,206
I believe someone here'’s
in need of a punishment.
519
00:19:40,275 --> 00:19:42,172
And another desk.
520
00:19:42,241 --> 00:19:43,965
Which I am more than happy
521
00:19:44,034 --> 00:19:46,206
to pay for out of my own pocket.
522
00:19:46,275 --> 00:19:48,344
Good luck skating
your way out of this one.
523
00:19:48,413 --> 00:19:49,448
Ha-ha.
524
00:19:49,517 --> 00:19:50,965
Thanks, aunt hilda.
525
00:19:51,034 --> 00:19:52,896
You know, it really
helps having aunts
526
00:19:52,965 --> 00:19:55,344
who dated every male
life-form in the solar system.
527
00:19:55,413 --> 00:19:57,068
Not every, but
we'’re working on it.
528
00:19:57,137 --> 00:20:00,034
I know i'’m not supposed to
use my magic to help mortals
529
00:20:00,103 --> 00:20:01,655
but I felt so bad for Harvey
530
00:20:01,724 --> 00:20:03,286
I just couldn'’t stand
by and do nothing.
531
00:20:03,310 --> 00:20:05,241
Your heart was in the
right place, Sabrina.
532
00:20:05,310 --> 00:20:06,965
I can'’t tell you the
number of times
533
00:20:07,034 --> 00:20:09,620
i'’ve wanted to use my finger
for the good of all mankind.
534
00:20:09,689 --> 00:20:11,448
[ Doorbell rings]
535
00:20:11,517 --> 00:20:12,931
It'’s Josh.
536
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,172
As you say, honey, got to go.
537
00:20:20,172 --> 00:20:22,068
Josh, i'’m so glad you'’re here.
538
00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:24,482
Are you? Are you sure
you wouldn'’t rather be
539
00:20:24,551 --> 00:20:26,137
with someone else like Harvey?
540
00:20:26,206 --> 00:20:28,758
Josh, nothing'’s going on
between Harvey and me.
541
00:20:28,827 --> 00:20:30,241
I Don'’t know how many times
542
00:20:30,310 --> 00:20:31,655
I have to tell you that.
543
00:20:31,724 --> 00:20:33,137
I just wish you would trust me.
544
00:20:33,206 --> 00:20:34,310
I want to trust you.
545
00:20:34,379 --> 00:20:36,034
I just feel like you and Harvey
546
00:20:36,103 --> 00:20:37,862
are sharing some sort of secret.
547
00:20:37,931 --> 00:20:39,724
Harvey and I have
a history together.
548
00:20:39,793 --> 00:20:40,896
I can'’t erase my past.
549
00:20:40,965 --> 00:20:43,137
But the important thing
is you'’re my future.
550
00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:46,699
So you'’re saying
there'’s nothing
551
00:20:46,724 --> 00:20:47,804
I have to worry about here?
552
00:20:49,862 --> 00:20:52,793
Not a thing.
553
00:20:56,931 --> 00:20:58,827
I'’m the real Salem saberhagen.
554
00:20:58,896 --> 00:21:00,965
And who am I, Joey Lawrence?
555
00:21:01,034 --> 00:21:02,034
Don'’t worry.
556
00:21:02,068 --> 00:21:04,068
We have an absolutely
foolproof method
557
00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:06,655
to determine which
Salem will stay with us.
558
00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:08,896
Lucky for me she'’s a scientist.
559
00:21:08,965 --> 00:21:10,551
Hilda?
560
00:21:10,620 --> 00:21:12,103
Eeny meenie minie moe
561
00:21:12,172 --> 00:21:14,241
catch a cloned cat by the toe
562
00:21:14,310 --> 00:21:16,068
if he hollers, let him go
563
00:21:16,137 --> 00:21:17,793
eenie meenie minie moe.
564
00:21:17,862 --> 00:21:20,965
Thank god you
picked the right one.
565
00:21:21,034 --> 00:21:22,517
Although, I miss me.
566
00:21:22,586 --> 00:21:24,137
[ Sobbing]
40833
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.