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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,724 --> 00:00:05,034 Well, it looks like everything'’s in order. 2 00:00:05,103 --> 00:00:07,586 All my chemicals are perfectly balanced. 3 00:00:07,655 --> 00:00:10,137 Let the cloning begin. 4 00:00:16,965 --> 00:00:19,000 An exact duplicate. 5 00:00:19,068 --> 00:00:20,137 Eureka! 6 00:00:20,206 --> 00:00:21,551 I'’m a genius! 7 00:00:21,620 --> 00:00:23,448 [ Phone ringing] 8 00:00:23,517 --> 00:00:25,862 Probably the nobel committee. 9 00:00:25,931 --> 00:00:27,241 Hello? 10 00:00:27,310 --> 00:00:28,482 Hi, whatcha doing? 11 00:00:28,551 --> 00:00:32,275 Just replicating a sequence of deoxyribonucleic acid. 12 00:00:32,344 --> 00:00:33,517 You'’re cloning? 13 00:00:33,586 --> 00:00:35,689 Wow, i'’m so proud to have you as my aunt. 14 00:00:35,758 --> 00:00:37,655 I mean, you'’re not only brilliant 15 00:00:37,724 --> 00:00:39,275 you'’re beautiful, kind 16 00:00:39,344 --> 00:00:41,758 and you'’re very, very, very special to me. 17 00:00:41,827 --> 00:00:43,137 How much money do you need? 18 00:00:43,206 --> 00:00:44,344 How much can you clone? 19 00:00:44,413 --> 00:00:45,655 Cloning money is illegal. 20 00:00:45,724 --> 00:00:47,517 But the sky'’s the limit with produce. 21 00:00:47,586 --> 00:00:49,034 How are you fixed for melons? 22 00:00:49,103 --> 00:00:50,724 Mmm, tomato. 23 00:00:50,793 --> 00:00:55,103 They say the antioxidants are good for the prostate and... 24 00:00:57,827 --> 00:00:59,862 [ Chuckles] 25 00:00:59,931 --> 00:01:02,000 Huh? 26 00:01:04,517 --> 00:01:10,655 ♪ Life'’s changing around me, and i'’m gonna make it mine ♪ 27 00:01:10,724 --> 00:01:17,068 ♪ i'’m reaching out and living by my rules... ♪ 28 00:01:17,137 --> 00:01:20,241 ♪ Time'’s moving way too fast ♪ 29 00:01:20,310 --> 00:01:24,172 ♪ I wanna make it last... 30 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:29,896 ♪ '’cause i'’m out on my own now ♪ 31 00:01:29,965 --> 00:01:34,620 ♪ and I like the way it feels. 32 00:01:40,827 --> 00:01:42,000 Sabrina, i'’m not paying you 33 00:01:42,068 --> 00:01:43,827 to make goo-goo eyes at the customers. 34 00:01:43,896 --> 00:01:45,620 Oh, i'’ve been meaning to bring that up 35 00:01:45,689 --> 00:01:46,758 at a staff meeting. 36 00:01:46,827 --> 00:01:48,413 Hey, it'’s not my fault you never 37 00:01:48,482 --> 00:01:50,068 get to spend any time with Josh. 38 00:01:50,137 --> 00:01:51,655 Who told him to leave his job 39 00:01:51,724 --> 00:01:54,448 at the coffeehouse to go work at some dead-end newspaper? 40 00:01:54,517 --> 00:01:56,379 Okay, I got to go, Sabrina. 41 00:01:56,448 --> 00:01:58,103 The "dead-end newspaper" 42 00:01:58,172 --> 00:02:00,758 is sending me to photograph the pope. 43 00:02:00,827 --> 00:02:03,724 Yeah, but does the paper give you free lattes? 44 00:02:03,793 --> 00:02:05,137 He didn'’t get that here, either. 45 00:02:05,206 --> 00:02:06,966 Listen, Mike'’s giving me Wednesday night off 46 00:02:07,034 --> 00:02:08,379 and I promise, we'’ll be together. 47 00:02:08,448 --> 00:02:09,551 Wednesday sounds good. 48 00:02:09,620 --> 00:02:11,275 Wednesday it is. 49 00:02:11,344 --> 00:02:13,655 Bye-bye! 50 00:02:13,724 --> 00:02:16,000 Harvey, what happened to you? 51 00:02:16,068 --> 00:02:18,068 Just a little hockey injury. 52 00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:19,586 Which he got while scoring 53 00:02:19,655 --> 00:02:21,965 the game-winning goal for Boston college. 54 00:02:22,034 --> 00:02:23,758 Harvey'’s the star of the team. 55 00:02:23,827 --> 00:02:26,068 And i'’m the star'’s girlfriend. 56 00:02:26,137 --> 00:02:28,586 And i'’m going to hurl. I'’ll see you Wednesday. 57 00:02:28,655 --> 00:02:30,838 We'’ll do whatever you want. I Don'’t care what it costs. 58 00:02:30,862 --> 00:02:32,462 Oh, you Don'’t have to spend a cent on me 59 00:02:32,517 --> 00:02:33,597 as long as we'’re together. 60 00:02:33,655 --> 00:02:35,103 That'’s a sentence 61 00:02:35,172 --> 00:02:38,310 you will never, ever hear me say. 62 00:02:38,379 --> 00:02:41,862 Hey, Sabrina, can I talk to you for a minute? 63 00:02:41,931 --> 00:02:43,206 Sure, what'’s up? 64 00:02:43,275 --> 00:02:44,310 I need your help. 65 00:02:44,379 --> 00:02:46,068 This ankle injury'’s pretty serious. 66 00:02:46,137 --> 00:02:47,620 I'’m afraid if coach finds out 67 00:02:47,689 --> 00:02:49,827 i'’ll wind up on the bench for the season. 68 00:02:49,896 --> 00:02:52,724 Well, i'’m not an orthopedic surgeon, Harvey 69 00:02:52,793 --> 00:02:54,896 but, hey, if you'’re up for it... 70 00:02:54,965 --> 00:02:56,103 Actually, I was hoping 71 00:02:56,172 --> 00:02:58,000 that you could do that thing that... 72 00:02:58,068 --> 00:02:59,172 That only you can do? 73 00:02:59,241 --> 00:03:01,172 Turn the world on with my smile? 74 00:03:01,241 --> 00:03:02,586 Oh, wait, that'’s Mary. 75 00:03:02,655 --> 00:03:05,413 I'’m talking about magic. 76 00:03:05,482 --> 00:03:06,793 Sabrina, i'’m desperate. 77 00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:08,586 We'’ve got a big game coming up 78 00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:10,379 and the team'’s counting on me. 79 00:03:10,448 --> 00:03:11,448 Harvey, i'’m not allowed 80 00:03:11,517 --> 00:03:13,034 to give my magic away to mortals. 81 00:03:13,103 --> 00:03:14,206 I'’m a witch, not a genie. 82 00:03:14,275 --> 00:03:15,620 Oh. 83 00:03:15,689 --> 00:03:17,724 You wouldn'’t happen to know any genies, would you? 84 00:03:17,793 --> 00:03:20,103 Only one, but she'’s having a little problem 85 00:03:20,172 --> 00:03:22,310 with the bottle, if you catch my drift. 86 00:03:22,379 --> 00:03:24,310 Sorry, Harvey, my fingers are tied. 87 00:03:24,379 --> 00:03:26,551 Well, it was worth a shot. 88 00:03:26,620 --> 00:03:28,420 But i'’ll tell you what, if you go see a doctor 89 00:03:28,482 --> 00:03:30,655 and get it taken care of, I promise i'’ll be at the game 90 00:03:30,724 --> 00:03:32,604 and i'’ll bring everyone I know to cheer you on. 91 00:03:32,655 --> 00:03:33,655 That would be great. 92 00:03:33,689 --> 00:03:34,862 See you Wednesday night. 93 00:03:34,931 --> 00:03:36,517 Wednesday night. 94 00:03:36,586 --> 00:03:38,827 I'’m sure Josh won'’t mind spending our date 95 00:03:38,896 --> 00:03:40,413 cheering on my ex-boyfriend. 96 00:03:42,034 --> 00:03:43,862 My first night off in two weeks 97 00:03:43,931 --> 00:03:46,655 and i'’m supposed to cheer on your ex-boyfriend? 98 00:03:46,724 --> 00:03:48,068 I hardly even know Harvey. 99 00:03:48,137 --> 00:03:50,413 I hate hockey, and she still dragged me here. 100 00:03:50,482 --> 00:03:51,758 I'’ve got bigger problems. 101 00:03:51,827 --> 00:03:52,965 Every sporting event I go to 102 00:03:53,034 --> 00:03:54,482 I get hit in the head by something. 103 00:03:54,551 --> 00:03:55,551 There can be 104 00:03:55,586 --> 00:03:56,862 60,000 people in a stadium 105 00:03:56,931 --> 00:03:58,551 and no matter where i'’m sitting 106 00:03:58,620 --> 00:04:00,655 the puck or the ball... Or the matador... 107 00:04:00,724 --> 00:04:02,896 Comes flying up and hits me in the head. 108 00:04:02,965 --> 00:04:04,172 Will you shut up already? 109 00:04:04,241 --> 00:04:05,931 Although, it usually doesn'’t kick in 110 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,517 until the game actually begins. 111 00:04:07,586 --> 00:04:08,586 Guys, stop complaining. 112 00:04:08,655 --> 00:04:10,172 Harvey'’s playing through an injury 113 00:04:10,241 --> 00:04:11,551 and we'’re here to support him. 114 00:04:11,620 --> 00:04:13,896 Yeah, anything for your ex-boyfriend. 115 00:04:13,965 --> 00:04:16,620 Who happens to be my current boyfriend. 116 00:04:16,689 --> 00:04:18,862 I'’m dating number ten. 117 00:04:18,931 --> 00:04:20,310 He'’s the star. 118 00:04:20,379 --> 00:04:22,206 Two salems can drive 119 00:04:22,275 --> 00:04:24,482 ninny and the professor twice as crazy 120 00:04:24,551 --> 00:04:26,551 and we can be kings of this castle. 121 00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:28,241 You'’ve got beauty and brains 122 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:30,206 which means, so do I. 123 00:04:32,379 --> 00:04:33,620 Hmm... 124 00:04:33,689 --> 00:04:35,137 Salem, what have you done? 125 00:04:35,206 --> 00:04:36,551 Me? Nothing. 126 00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:38,620 I'’ve just been sitting here 127 00:04:38,689 --> 00:04:41,241 grooming myself, as cats will do. 128 00:04:41,310 --> 00:04:42,379 Hmm... 129 00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:44,172 Must'’ve been the wind. 130 00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:46,482 I think you owe me an apology. 131 00:04:46,551 --> 00:04:48,103 I'’m sorry, Salem. 132 00:04:48,172 --> 00:04:50,034 I'’ll let it go this time. 133 00:04:50,103 --> 00:04:52,517 Wait a minute. 134 00:04:52,586 --> 00:04:54,379 What wind? 135 00:04:54,448 --> 00:04:56,413 This could be the beginning 136 00:04:56,482 --> 00:04:58,379 of a beautiful friendship. 137 00:04:58,448 --> 00:05:00,655 I like the way I think. 138 00:05:00,724 --> 00:05:02,034 Oh, there goes Harvey! 139 00:05:02,103 --> 00:05:03,965 He'’s driving toward the goal! 140 00:05:06,103 --> 00:05:08,344 And he gets the puck stolen from him. 141 00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:09,586 Thief! 142 00:05:11,068 --> 00:05:13,275 Oh, there goes Harvey! 143 00:05:13,344 --> 00:05:14,172 He'’s wide open! 144 00:05:14,241 --> 00:05:15,517 He'’s getting ready to shoot! 145 00:05:18,034 --> 00:05:19,862 And he trips and falls... again. 146 00:05:19,931 --> 00:05:22,586 The beauty of ice is that after you fall on it 147 00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:25,068 you can use it to bring down the swelling. 148 00:05:25,137 --> 00:05:26,137 Oh, he'’s back up! 149 00:05:26,206 --> 00:05:27,344 You know what they say... 150 00:05:27,413 --> 00:05:28,862 You can'’t keep a good man down. 151 00:05:28,931 --> 00:05:30,034 Ooh! Or kinkle up. 152 00:05:30,103 --> 00:05:32,275 This is so humiliating. 153 00:05:32,344 --> 00:05:33,896 Oh, Harvey'’ll bounce back. 154 00:05:33,965 --> 00:05:34,896 I meant for me. 155 00:05:34,965 --> 00:05:35,965 I'’m his girlfriend. 156 00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:39,137 It looks like the coach is benching him. 157 00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:41,965 Wow, i'’ve never seen anyone fall off the bench before. 158 00:05:42,034 --> 00:05:44,793 Let'’s hope they keep him benched for the rest of the season. 159 00:05:46,206 --> 00:05:48,275 This is exactly what Harvey was afraid of. 160 00:05:48,344 --> 00:05:50,689 Hey, kinkle! You stinkle! 161 00:05:52,068 --> 00:05:54,862 Oh, man, even i'’m feeling sorry for the guy. 162 00:05:54,931 --> 00:05:56,172 Oh, poor Harvey. 163 00:05:56,241 --> 00:05:57,586 I just Don'’t understand. 164 00:05:57,655 --> 00:06:00,517 I mean, just last week he was skating like a god. 165 00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:04,241 Skating? God? 166 00:06:04,310 --> 00:06:05,586 That'’s it. 167 00:06:05,655 --> 00:06:06,586 Uh, i'’ll be right back. 168 00:06:06,655 --> 00:06:08,482 I'’ve got to get more relish for my sausage. 169 00:06:08,551 --> 00:06:10,034 I'’ll get it for you. No, no, no, no! 170 00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,241 I am very particular about the relish on my sausage. 171 00:06:12,310 --> 00:06:14,655 If there'’s too much relish, it can overpower a sausage. 172 00:06:14,724 --> 00:06:17,206 If there'’s not enough, it can... underpower it. 173 00:06:17,275 --> 00:06:19,586 Do you give this much thought to all your condiments? 174 00:06:19,655 --> 00:06:21,931 Don'’t get me started on horseradish. 175 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:23,275 I know what she means. 176 00:06:23,344 --> 00:06:25,448 I'’m convinced the cause of my uncle buddy'’s death 177 00:06:25,517 --> 00:06:26,448 was aunt may'’s relish. 178 00:06:26,517 --> 00:06:28,344 Not that uncle buddy didn'’t have it coming. 179 00:06:28,413 --> 00:06:30,137 Thank you! 180 00:06:31,275 --> 00:06:32,310 Hi, Mercury, i'’m... 181 00:06:32,379 --> 00:06:34,034 Eh, eh, eh... 182 00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:36,137 Now, i'’m sorry about your late delivery, Minerva 183 00:06:36,206 --> 00:06:38,517 but the traffic around mount Olympus is a nightmare. 184 00:06:38,586 --> 00:06:40,517 [ Sarcastic chuckle] 185 00:06:40,586 --> 00:06:42,206 She may be the goddess of wisdom 186 00:06:42,275 --> 00:06:44,620 but she has got a mouth like a chariot driver. 187 00:06:44,689 --> 00:06:46,620 I'’m sorry to bother you, but my ex-boyfriend 188 00:06:46,689 --> 00:06:48,482 is playing in a big hockey game right now 189 00:06:48,551 --> 00:06:49,631 and he'’s got this ankle injury 190 00:06:49,655 --> 00:06:50,700 and the coach has benched him 191 00:06:50,724 --> 00:06:51,907 and I was wondering if you had 192 00:06:51,931 --> 00:06:53,734 a pair of really fast ice skates I could borrow. 193 00:06:53,758 --> 00:06:56,758 And you are the goddess of what, run-on sentences? 194 00:06:56,827 --> 00:06:58,827 Actually, i'’m not a goddess... I'’m a witch. 195 00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:00,827 Well, actually, half-witch, half-mortal. 196 00:07:00,896 --> 00:07:02,275 Well, how about those skates? 197 00:07:02,344 --> 00:07:03,758 I only have one pair. 198 00:07:03,827 --> 00:07:05,965 I'’ve never lent them out before. 199 00:07:06,034 --> 00:07:09,000 Well... you can have them for three virgins. 200 00:07:09,068 --> 00:07:10,310 Oh, and a goat. 201 00:07:10,379 --> 00:07:11,827 Would you settle for 202 00:07:11,896 --> 00:07:15,034 a foot-long Polish sausage with extra kraut? 203 00:07:15,103 --> 00:07:18,586 Oh, you found my achilles heel! 204 00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:20,827 That'’s the one thing you can'’t get up here. 205 00:07:20,896 --> 00:07:24,103 Oh, just be sure and bring them back within 24 hours. 206 00:07:24,172 --> 00:07:25,931 Oh, well, that'’s how long it should take 207 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,551 for that sausage to back up on you. 208 00:07:31,034 --> 00:07:33,034 Harvey, put these on. 209 00:07:33,103 --> 00:07:34,241 Where'’d these come from? 210 00:07:34,310 --> 00:07:35,551 Don'’t ask questions. 211 00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:36,724 Just do as I say. 212 00:07:36,793 --> 00:07:39,206 Suddenly I feel like we'’re dating again. 213 00:07:39,275 --> 00:07:41,655 I need these back first thing tomorrow morning, got it? 214 00:07:41,724 --> 00:07:42,896 Got it, thanks. 215 00:07:44,310 --> 00:07:45,827 I knew I could count on you. 216 00:07:45,896 --> 00:07:47,103 You are the greatest. 217 00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,620 Whoa. 218 00:07:50,689 --> 00:07:52,103 I thought you were somebody else. 219 00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:53,310 Really sorry. 220 00:07:53,379 --> 00:07:55,827 Want to get some coffee after the game? 221 00:08:00,448 --> 00:08:03,206 Wayne is really going to love my impromptu little dinner. 222 00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:05,206 Don'’t you think the president of the college 223 00:08:05,275 --> 00:08:06,931 deserves something a little classier 224 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,344 than Bologna and ding dongs? 225 00:08:09,413 --> 00:08:11,344 Did you not notice the cheez whiz? 226 00:08:11,413 --> 00:08:13,689 I stand corrected. 227 00:08:13,758 --> 00:08:16,551 So, you and Zelda'’s boss? 228 00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:20,482 Frankly, if I were Zelda, i'’d be a wee bit upset. 229 00:08:20,551 --> 00:08:23,137 If you were Zelda, i'’d be suicidal. 230 00:08:23,206 --> 00:08:24,310 There, all done. 231 00:08:24,379 --> 00:08:25,724 I just have to run upstairs 232 00:08:25,793 --> 00:08:27,758 and get a blanket for us to snuggle on. 233 00:08:27,827 --> 00:08:30,034 Oh, what was I thinking? 234 00:08:30,103 --> 00:08:31,793 There'’s no way i'’m leaving you alone here 235 00:08:31,862 --> 00:08:32,896 with all this food. 236 00:08:32,965 --> 00:08:34,793 [ Sobbing] 237 00:08:42,413 --> 00:08:43,620 Hilda? 238 00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:47,965 Oh, my goodness! 239 00:08:48,034 --> 00:08:51,137 It looks like we'’ve been pillaged by the huns again. 240 00:08:51,206 --> 00:08:53,931 Zelda spellman, how could you? 241 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,793 How could I what? 242 00:08:55,862 --> 00:08:58,413 Just because you'’re jealous because i'’m dating your boss 243 00:08:58,482 --> 00:09:01,172 doesn'’t give you the right to destroy my romantic dinner. 244 00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:04,758 Obviously this was the work of a fiendish four-legged feline. 245 00:09:04,827 --> 00:09:06,379 I Don'’t think so, Zelda. 246 00:09:06,448 --> 00:09:08,586 Salem was with me the whole time. 247 00:09:08,655 --> 00:09:11,551 I can'’t believe you think I would do something so petty 248 00:09:11,620 --> 00:09:15,758 just because i'’m jealous, which I absolutely am not. 249 00:09:15,827 --> 00:09:18,689 For once in your 658 years 250 00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:20,793 will you own up to your real feelings? 251 00:09:20,862 --> 00:09:23,068 All right, you want real feeling, sister? 252 00:09:23,137 --> 00:09:24,379 I'’ll give you real feelings. 253 00:09:24,448 --> 00:09:26,448 I think president banning is out of his mind 254 00:09:26,517 --> 00:09:27,655 to be going out with you. 255 00:09:27,724 --> 00:09:29,206 Oh, yeah? Well, who asked you? 256 00:09:29,275 --> 00:09:30,000 You did! 257 00:09:30,068 --> 00:09:31,620 Sure, throw that in my face. 258 00:09:31,689 --> 00:09:34,000 Oh, no, missy, you opened up this can of worms 259 00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:35,551 and we'’re going to finish it! 260 00:09:35,620 --> 00:09:37,793 [ Chewing loudly] 261 00:09:37,862 --> 00:09:41,000 Now that'’s entertainment, hmm? 262 00:09:42,793 --> 00:09:44,275 Announcer: Goal for Boston college! 263 00:09:44,344 --> 00:09:46,464 Ladies and gentlemen, a new single game scoring record 264 00:09:46,517 --> 00:09:47,877 has just been set by Harvey kinkle! 265 00:09:47,931 --> 00:09:49,965 That'’s my boyfriend! 266 00:09:50,034 --> 00:09:51,241 All: We know! 267 00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:53,862 I'’ve never seen someone skate so fast before. 268 00:09:53,931 --> 00:09:56,551 Call me crazy, but I think he'’s really flying. 269 00:09:56,620 --> 00:09:57,665 Oh, no, no! He'’s just jazzed 270 00:09:57,689 --> 00:09:59,286 because we all showed up to cheer him on! 271 00:09:59,310 --> 00:10:00,862 You know, he never played like this 272 00:10:00,931 --> 00:10:02,137 before I was his girlfriend. 273 00:10:05,344 --> 00:10:06,793 Yeah, well, if you'’re his girlfriend 274 00:10:06,862 --> 00:10:07,931 why is he waving at mine? 275 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,655 Oh, he'’s not waving at me. 276 00:10:09,724 --> 00:10:12,103 He'’s just... trying to get the vendor. 277 00:10:12,172 --> 00:10:13,896 Uh, get that guy some nuts! 278 00:10:18,793 --> 00:10:19,965 Hi, Harvey. 279 00:10:20,034 --> 00:10:22,103 Still flying high after last night'’s game? 280 00:10:22,172 --> 00:10:23,896 It was the most exciting night of my life 281 00:10:23,965 --> 00:10:25,034 and I owe it all to you. 282 00:10:25,103 --> 00:10:26,793 Oh, what are friends for? 283 00:10:26,862 --> 00:10:28,907 I mean, i'’m sure you would'’ve done the same thing for me. 284 00:10:28,931 --> 00:10:30,044 You know, if you were a witch. 285 00:10:30,068 --> 00:10:32,068 I brought you a little present. 286 00:10:32,137 --> 00:10:34,655 Oh, it'’s beautiful! 287 00:10:34,724 --> 00:10:36,620 But you really didn'’t have to get me anything. 288 00:10:36,689 --> 00:10:39,517 Oh, yes, I did. 289 00:10:39,586 --> 00:10:40,931 The coach was so impressed 290 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,620 with my performance last night 291 00:10:42,689 --> 00:10:44,482 he took the skates from my locker 292 00:10:44,551 --> 00:10:46,172 and secretly had them bronzed. 293 00:10:46,241 --> 00:10:47,448 It'’s a real honor. 294 00:10:47,517 --> 00:10:49,068 It'’s a real disaster is what it is. 295 00:10:49,137 --> 00:10:50,827 I borrowed these skates from Mercury 296 00:10:50,896 --> 00:10:53,413 and the last thing you want to do is make a god angry. 297 00:10:53,482 --> 00:10:56,551 Wow, I was wearing a god'’s skates? 298 00:10:56,620 --> 00:10:58,172 That is so cool. 299 00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,551 Okay, I Don'’t think you get what'’s at stake here. 300 00:11:00,620 --> 00:11:03,103 Um, does the name prometheus mean anything to you? 301 00:11:03,172 --> 00:11:06,241 He'’s the guy who stole fire from Zeus. 302 00:11:06,310 --> 00:11:08,413 And wound up chained to a rock for all eternity 303 00:11:08,482 --> 00:11:10,103 with vultures pecking out his liver! 304 00:11:10,172 --> 00:11:12,000 We'’ve got to get those skates out of there! 305 00:11:14,137 --> 00:11:16,034 Wait! No need to destroy school property. 306 00:11:19,517 --> 00:11:21,517 I keep forgetting you can do that. 307 00:11:21,586 --> 00:11:23,551 Now the important part: UN-bronzing them. 308 00:11:28,172 --> 00:11:30,275 Well, so much for saving school property. 309 00:11:30,344 --> 00:11:31,620 What are we going to do? 310 00:11:31,689 --> 00:11:33,931 All I know is, no bird is getting near my liver! 311 00:11:39,517 --> 00:11:40,620 They'’re bronzed! 312 00:11:40,689 --> 00:11:42,103 Consider it a gift. 313 00:11:42,172 --> 00:11:44,137 You Don'’t have to thank me. 314 00:11:44,206 --> 00:11:46,931 I won'’t, because I have no use for bronzed skates. 315 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,827 Can'’t you just unbronze them? 316 00:11:48,896 --> 00:11:49,655 Could you? 317 00:11:49,724 --> 00:11:50,764 No, but i'’m just a witch. 318 00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:51,793 You'’re a god. 319 00:11:51,827 --> 00:11:54,724 Have you ever heard of a god of UN-bronzing? 320 00:11:54,793 --> 00:11:56,620 Isn'’t he the one who brought us sunscreen? 321 00:11:56,689 --> 00:11:58,379 Look, blondie, you'’re in big trouble. 322 00:11:58,448 --> 00:12:00,000 You ruined my only pair of skates 323 00:12:00,068 --> 00:12:02,655 and now you'’re going to have to pay the consequences. 324 00:12:02,724 --> 00:12:04,344 No, please Don'’t peck out my liver. 325 00:12:04,413 --> 00:12:05,551 I have midterms in two weeks 326 00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:07,793 and it'’s really hard to study without a vital organ. 327 00:12:07,862 --> 00:12:08,758 Save it for Zeus. 328 00:12:08,827 --> 00:12:10,027 Punishments are his specialty. 329 00:12:10,068 --> 00:12:13,034 Dottie, can you get Zeus for me? 330 00:12:17,275 --> 00:12:19,517 Thanks, dottie, and i'’ll need another desk. 331 00:12:20,931 --> 00:12:22,551 Who am I punishing today? 332 00:12:22,620 --> 00:12:24,724 Her. I loaned her my only pair of skates 333 00:12:24,793 --> 00:12:25,793 and she ruined them. 334 00:12:25,862 --> 00:12:26,793 It was an accident. 335 00:12:26,862 --> 00:12:27,793 You see, I borrowed them 336 00:12:27,862 --> 00:12:29,689 for my ex-boyfriend. We have a lot of history. 337 00:12:29,758 --> 00:12:31,275 Anyway, his team was losing the game 338 00:12:31,344 --> 00:12:32,413 and he was injured, so... 339 00:12:32,482 --> 00:12:34,034 Quiet! 340 00:12:35,275 --> 00:12:37,517 And that'’s why he gets paid the big bucks. 341 00:12:37,586 --> 00:12:40,310 Young lady, destroying the property of a god 342 00:12:40,379 --> 00:12:41,724 is a serious offense. 343 00:12:41,793 --> 00:12:46,068 And it is my pleasure... I mean, duty 344 00:12:46,137 --> 00:12:48,413 to come up with an appropriate punishment. 345 00:12:48,482 --> 00:12:50,310 Um, I Don'’t mean to be pushy, Zeus 346 00:12:50,379 --> 00:12:52,862 but isn'’t it also the duty of a god... 347 00:12:52,931 --> 00:12:55,206 Especially you, the king of gods... 348 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,310 To be merciful? 349 00:12:56,379 --> 00:12:57,965 Mercy'’s a wonderful concept 350 00:12:58,034 --> 00:13:00,689 but I find it gets in the way of punishment. 351 00:13:00,758 --> 00:13:02,551 Since i'’m the injured party... 352 00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:04,482 Oh, oh... Uh, great god of gods. 353 00:13:04,551 --> 00:13:06,241 May I be so bold as to suggest 354 00:13:06,310 --> 00:13:08,827 that she make all my deliveries for a month? 355 00:13:08,896 --> 00:13:11,310 Well, I suppose that would be more fitting than... 356 00:13:11,379 --> 00:13:13,068 Throwing her in a pit 357 00:13:13,137 --> 00:13:16,448 and letting the wildebeests feast on her? 358 00:13:16,517 --> 00:13:18,000 Way more fitting. 359 00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:23,517 Would it kill him to use a door once in a while? 360 00:13:25,965 --> 00:13:27,137 I understand the shoes 361 00:13:27,206 --> 00:13:29,344 but do I have to wear this hideous hat? 362 00:13:29,413 --> 00:13:31,206 It was a birthday gift from Zeus'’s wife. 363 00:13:31,275 --> 00:13:32,896 I love it. 364 00:13:32,965 --> 00:13:33,965 Here'’s your beeper. 365 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,482 And deliver this package to Apollo. 366 00:13:36,551 --> 00:13:37,896 Is this the only one? 367 00:13:37,965 --> 00:13:39,965 No. It'’s the only one I could lift. 368 00:13:43,034 --> 00:13:43,896 [ Sighs] 369 00:13:43,965 --> 00:13:45,379 If anyone needs me 370 00:13:45,448 --> 00:13:48,655 i'’ll be snorkeling at club med Atlantis. 371 00:13:48,724 --> 00:13:51,931 And i'’ll be here drowning in a sea of cardboard. 372 00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:58,758 Package for Mr. Narcissus? 373 00:13:58,827 --> 00:14:00,310 Sign here, please. 374 00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:29,689 Okay, i'’ve got to write the psychology paper 375 00:14:29,758 --> 00:14:31,068 and then i'’ve got to deliver 376 00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:32,965 this mother'’s day basket from oedipus. 377 00:14:33,034 --> 00:14:36,275 Hmm, if only I could write about that. 378 00:14:36,344 --> 00:14:38,724 Pan? Pan? 379 00:14:38,793 --> 00:14:39,896 Pan! 380 00:14:39,965 --> 00:14:42,758 Message from your condo association: 381 00:14:42,827 --> 00:14:45,068 "Learn a new freakin'’ song." 382 00:14:45,137 --> 00:14:46,448 Hey, Don'’t shoot the messenger! 383 00:14:49,517 --> 00:14:51,586 Josh: Sorry I missed you again. 384 00:14:51,655 --> 00:14:54,068 You know, your phone also dials out. 385 00:14:54,137 --> 00:14:55,931 Josh? Josh, wait! 386 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:57,620 Hello? 387 00:14:57,689 --> 00:15:00,689 [ Pager beeping] 388 00:15:00,758 --> 00:15:03,275 "And wear flippers"? 389 00:15:03,344 --> 00:15:04,689 Now, what'’s that about? 390 00:15:14,034 --> 00:15:16,448 Oops. My mistake. 391 00:15:24,931 --> 00:15:26,620 Josh, what are you doing here? 392 00:15:26,689 --> 00:15:28,896 I just wanted to see what'’s up with you. 393 00:15:28,965 --> 00:15:31,172 I mean, whenever I call, you'’re never... 394 00:15:31,241 --> 00:15:32,379 What are you wearing? 395 00:15:32,448 --> 00:15:34,034 Is that seaweed in your hair? 396 00:15:34,103 --> 00:15:35,379 Oh, i'’m going for a new look. 397 00:15:35,448 --> 00:15:37,896 I'’m sorry I haven'’t called you. It'’s been a god-awful week. 398 00:15:37,965 --> 00:15:39,206 Hey, i'’m busy, too, all right? 399 00:15:39,275 --> 00:15:41,241 But at least I find time to return your calls. 400 00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:42,241 We haven'’t talked 401 00:15:42,310 --> 00:15:44,068 since you dragged me to Harvey'’s game. 402 00:15:44,137 --> 00:15:45,941 Sabrina, is there something going on with you two 403 00:15:45,965 --> 00:15:47,137 you'’re not telling me about? 404 00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:49,793 Josh, you know that'’s not true. Why would you even think that? 405 00:15:49,862 --> 00:15:51,000 [ Knocking] 406 00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:54,655 Hey, Sabrina 407 00:15:54,724 --> 00:15:56,620 just wanted to thank you again for last night. 408 00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:57,689 Oh, Harvey, not now. 409 00:15:57,758 --> 00:16:00,758 Hey, Josh, didn'’t see you there. 410 00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:01,827 Obviously. 411 00:16:01,862 --> 00:16:03,068 Um, I can explain. 412 00:16:03,137 --> 00:16:04,655 [ Pager beeping] 413 00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:06,379 Uh, as soon as I get back. 414 00:16:06,448 --> 00:16:08,344 Got to go. 415 00:16:08,413 --> 00:16:11,620 Girl can wear anything, can'’t she? 416 00:16:11,689 --> 00:16:12,862 You have been jealous of me 417 00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:14,655 since the day I came out of the womb. 418 00:16:14,724 --> 00:16:15,965 How can I be jealous of you 419 00:16:16,034 --> 00:16:17,344 when you have nothing I want? 420 00:16:17,413 --> 00:16:19,310 Except the president of your college. 421 00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:21,172 I do not want president banning. 422 00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:23,172 I do, however, want the Pearl earrings 423 00:16:23,241 --> 00:16:25,862 which were stolen from my jewelry box this morning. 424 00:16:25,931 --> 00:16:27,517 Are you accusing me of stealing? 425 00:16:27,586 --> 00:16:29,206 I'’m merely saying that they are missing 426 00:16:29,275 --> 00:16:30,862 and you'’re the only one in the house. 427 00:16:30,931 --> 00:16:32,068 I Don'’t know which is worse 428 00:16:32,137 --> 00:16:34,275 you thinking that I would steal your Pearl earrings 429 00:16:34,344 --> 00:16:36,344 or you thinking that I would actually wear them. 430 00:16:36,413 --> 00:16:37,862 Do I look like Sandra day o'’connor? 431 00:16:40,068 --> 00:16:42,137 The stealing'’s a nice touch. 432 00:16:42,206 --> 00:16:45,758 Nothing you wouldn'’t have thought of yourself. 433 00:16:45,827 --> 00:16:48,241 And may I say you look stunning? 434 00:16:48,310 --> 00:16:50,379 Pearls and basic black? 435 00:16:50,448 --> 00:16:52,413 A timeless classic. 436 00:16:52,482 --> 00:16:53,758 I am getting out of here. 437 00:16:53,827 --> 00:16:55,310 I can'’t stand this anymore. 438 00:16:55,379 --> 00:16:56,310 Oh, and I can? 439 00:16:56,379 --> 00:16:58,068 Fine. If you'’re taking the car 440 00:16:58,137 --> 00:16:59,551 drop me at my president'’s house. 441 00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:00,724 I will not! 442 00:17:00,793 --> 00:17:02,793 Fine. Then i'’m taking the car. 443 00:17:02,862 --> 00:17:03,862 Fine. Then drop me 444 00:17:03,931 --> 00:17:05,965 at my younger, better-looking boyfriend'’s house. 445 00:17:06,034 --> 00:17:11,000 Fine. But i'’m not slowing down the car. 446 00:17:11,068 --> 00:17:13,103 [ Both chuckle] 447 00:17:13,172 --> 00:17:14,413 [ Music playing] 448 00:17:14,482 --> 00:17:18,448 Just like you to forget your keys. 449 00:17:21,034 --> 00:17:21,827 [ Music stops] 450 00:17:21,896 --> 00:17:22,896 Both: Hey! 451 00:17:22,931 --> 00:17:24,448 Ever hear the expression 452 00:17:24,517 --> 00:17:26,586 "double your pleasure, double your fun"? 453 00:17:26,655 --> 00:17:27,965 Ever hear the expression 454 00:17:28,034 --> 00:17:29,379 "you'’re in deep doo-doo"? 455 00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:31,137 [ Both groan] 456 00:17:32,448 --> 00:17:34,103 Cool hat. Could you get me one of those? 457 00:17:34,172 --> 00:17:35,655 Uh, no. Where'’s Josh? 458 00:17:35,724 --> 00:17:36,724 He left. 459 00:17:36,758 --> 00:17:38,551 I'’m afraid he'’s upset with me. 460 00:17:38,620 --> 00:17:39,793 You think he knows 461 00:17:39,862 --> 00:17:42,206 we have all these secrets between us? 462 00:17:42,275 --> 00:17:43,941 Oh, you mean, like, that you know i'’m a witch 463 00:17:43,965 --> 00:17:46,079 and I lent you magical skates and now i'’m moonlighting 464 00:17:46,103 --> 00:17:47,241 as a messenger for Mercury? 465 00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:48,620 Yeah, that. 466 00:17:48,689 --> 00:17:50,241 I should probably go talk to him 467 00:17:50,310 --> 00:17:52,344 but i'’ve got to go to rite aid for Apollo. 468 00:17:52,413 --> 00:17:54,482 You know, you'’d think he'’d be able to find 469 00:17:54,551 --> 00:17:56,068 some grecian formula in Greece. 470 00:17:56,137 --> 00:17:58,517 Hey, this whole thing is my fault. 471 00:17:58,586 --> 00:18:01,103 Is there any way at all I can help? 472 00:18:01,172 --> 00:18:03,137 Not unless you can figure out a way 473 00:18:03,206 --> 00:18:04,793 I can be in two places at once. 474 00:18:04,862 --> 00:18:06,068 You'’re a genius, Harvey. 475 00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,551 Never see that coming. 476 00:18:13,103 --> 00:18:15,241 Both: I'’m telling you it was his idea! 477 00:18:15,310 --> 00:18:16,241 I'’m innocent! 478 00:18:16,310 --> 00:18:18,000 You shut up! No, you shut up! 479 00:18:18,068 --> 00:18:19,068 Both: You shut up! 480 00:18:19,137 --> 00:18:20,137 Both: You both shut up! 481 00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:21,724 This is scary. 482 00:18:21,793 --> 00:18:22,931 Hello, Sabrina. 483 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,931 What are you doing here? 484 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,379 You know your cloning machine? 485 00:18:26,448 --> 00:18:28,793 Obviously Salem does. I need to borrow it. 486 00:18:28,862 --> 00:18:29,965 Too late. 487 00:18:30,034 --> 00:18:31,758 We just smashed it to smithereens. 488 00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:33,482 This is so not my day. 489 00:18:33,551 --> 00:18:34,551 [ Pager beeps] 490 00:18:34,586 --> 00:18:37,068 Does everyone in the world but me have a beeper? 491 00:18:37,137 --> 00:18:38,965 This actually belongs to Mercury. 492 00:18:39,034 --> 00:18:40,793 Mercury? Didn'’t you used to date him? 493 00:18:40,862 --> 00:18:41,862 Don'’t remind me. 494 00:18:41,931 --> 00:18:43,517 When he took off those sandals 495 00:18:43,586 --> 00:18:45,137 ugh, talk about a mood killer. 496 00:18:45,206 --> 00:18:46,965 I have to do all his work for a month 497 00:18:47,034 --> 00:18:48,931 '’cause I ruined his only pair of skates. 498 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,379 Only pair of skates? 499 00:18:51,448 --> 00:18:55,034 I give you Mercury'’s closet. 500 00:18:55,103 --> 00:18:57,965 Complete with an entire section devoted to skates. 501 00:18:58,034 --> 00:19:00,310 Whoa. How did you know these were here? 502 00:19:00,379 --> 00:19:04,000 You think i'’d date a guy without snooping through his closets? 503 00:19:04,068 --> 00:19:06,586 Hey, my pink pumps. 504 00:19:06,655 --> 00:19:08,482 They look nice with wings. 505 00:19:08,551 --> 00:19:09,551 Sabrina, hilda 506 00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:10,862 what are you doing here? 507 00:19:10,931 --> 00:19:13,448 You picked the wrong witch'’s niece to pick on. 508 00:19:14,413 --> 00:19:15,689 Yeah, you'’re busted, flyboy. 509 00:19:15,758 --> 00:19:18,241 Why did you tell me you only had one pair of skates? 510 00:19:18,310 --> 00:19:21,275 '’cause he'’s a lazy, conniving, pink pump pilferer 511 00:19:21,344 --> 00:19:25,379 who still hasn'’t discovered odor eaters. 512 00:19:25,448 --> 00:19:26,379 I'’ll tell you one thing. 513 00:19:26,448 --> 00:19:28,148 Zeus is going to have a great time punishing you 514 00:19:28,172 --> 00:19:29,665 when he finds out about your little scam. 515 00:19:29,689 --> 00:19:30,689 Yeah. 516 00:19:30,758 --> 00:19:32,655 Hey, there'’s no reason we can'’t keep this 517 00:19:32,724 --> 00:19:33,862 amongst the three of us. 518 00:19:36,965 --> 00:19:40,206 I believe someone here'’s in need of a punishment. 519 00:19:40,275 --> 00:19:42,172 And another desk. 520 00:19:42,241 --> 00:19:43,965 Which I am more than happy 521 00:19:44,034 --> 00:19:46,206 to pay for out of my own pocket. 522 00:19:46,275 --> 00:19:48,344 Good luck skating your way out of this one. 523 00:19:48,413 --> 00:19:49,448 Ha-ha. 524 00:19:49,517 --> 00:19:50,965 Thanks, aunt hilda. 525 00:19:51,034 --> 00:19:52,896 You know, it really helps having aunts 526 00:19:52,965 --> 00:19:55,344 who dated every male life-form in the solar system. 527 00:19:55,413 --> 00:19:57,068 Not every, but we'’re working on it. 528 00:19:57,137 --> 00:20:00,034 I know i'’m not supposed to use my magic to help mortals 529 00:20:00,103 --> 00:20:01,655 but I felt so bad for Harvey 530 00:20:01,724 --> 00:20:03,286 I just couldn'’t stand by and do nothing. 531 00:20:03,310 --> 00:20:05,241 Your heart was in the right place, Sabrina. 532 00:20:05,310 --> 00:20:06,965 I can'’t tell you the number of times 533 00:20:07,034 --> 00:20:09,620 i'’ve wanted to use my finger for the good of all mankind. 534 00:20:09,689 --> 00:20:11,448 [ Doorbell rings] 535 00:20:11,517 --> 00:20:12,931 It'’s Josh. 536 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,172 As you say, honey, got to go. 537 00:20:20,172 --> 00:20:22,068 Josh, i'’m so glad you'’re here. 538 00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:24,482 Are you? Are you sure you wouldn'’t rather be 539 00:20:24,551 --> 00:20:26,137 with someone else like Harvey? 540 00:20:26,206 --> 00:20:28,758 Josh, nothing'’s going on between Harvey and me. 541 00:20:28,827 --> 00:20:30,241 I Don'’t know how many times 542 00:20:30,310 --> 00:20:31,655 I have to tell you that. 543 00:20:31,724 --> 00:20:33,137 I just wish you would trust me. 544 00:20:33,206 --> 00:20:34,310 I want to trust you. 545 00:20:34,379 --> 00:20:36,034 I just feel like you and Harvey 546 00:20:36,103 --> 00:20:37,862 are sharing some sort of secret. 547 00:20:37,931 --> 00:20:39,724 Harvey and I have a history together. 548 00:20:39,793 --> 00:20:40,896 I can'’t erase my past. 549 00:20:40,965 --> 00:20:43,137 But the important thing is you'’re my future. 550 00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:46,699 So you'’re saying there'’s nothing 551 00:20:46,724 --> 00:20:47,804 I have to worry about here? 552 00:20:49,862 --> 00:20:52,793 Not a thing. 553 00:20:56,931 --> 00:20:58,827 I'’m the real Salem saberhagen. 554 00:20:58,896 --> 00:21:00,965 And who am I, Joey Lawrence? 555 00:21:01,034 --> 00:21:02,034 Don'’t worry. 556 00:21:02,068 --> 00:21:04,068 We have an absolutely foolproof method 557 00:21:04,137 --> 00:21:06,655 to determine which Salem will stay with us. 558 00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:08,896 Lucky for me she'’s a scientist. 559 00:21:08,965 --> 00:21:10,551 Hilda? 560 00:21:10,620 --> 00:21:12,103 Eeny meenie minie moe 561 00:21:12,172 --> 00:21:14,241 catch a cloned cat by the toe 562 00:21:14,310 --> 00:21:16,068 if he hollers, let him go 563 00:21:16,137 --> 00:21:17,793 eenie meenie minie moe. 564 00:21:17,862 --> 00:21:20,965 Thank god you picked the right one. 565 00:21:21,034 --> 00:21:22,517 Although, I miss me. 566 00:21:22,586 --> 00:21:24,137 [ Sobbing] 40833

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