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A POP Original Series
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[Dog barks]
3
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[Shower splashes]
4
00:00:08,530 --> 00:00:10,401
Johnny: Moira! The water's
ice cold!
5
00:00:10,445 --> 00:00:12,447
How long were you in here?!
6
00:00:12,490 --> 00:00:14,449
- John, you know my ritual!
7
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Five to ten minutes
to let the water warm,
8
00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:18,453
there's the initial scrub,
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00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:19,628
followed by the deep
conditioner,
10
00:00:19,671 --> 00:00:21,412
which must set for 20 minutes,
11
00:00:21,456 --> 00:00:23,806
and finally,
the double rinse cycle.
12
00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:25,634
- Well, we can't be doing that
anymore, sweetheart!
13
00:00:25,677 --> 00:00:28,071
Our water bill is going
through the roof!
14
00:00:28,115 --> 00:00:31,596
- Yes, painfully aware of our
budgetary constraints, John.
15
00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:35,035
I'm currently reading
a magazine from July, 1987.
16
00:00:35,078 --> 00:00:36,993
Where do you even find these?
17
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:38,212
Alexis: So I just signed
for this,
18
00:00:38,255 --> 00:00:39,822
so does that mean I get
to keep it?
19
00:00:39,865 --> 00:00:42,520
Also, what is it?
- Oh my God, it's here.
20
00:00:42,564 --> 00:00:44,174
Give it some room, Alexis!
- Give what some room?
21
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- What exactly are you getting
22
00:00:46,307 --> 00:00:48,657
shipped from
"Harrod's of London?"
23
00:00:48,700 --> 00:00:50,180
- Family, I'd like to you
to meet a dear friend
24
00:00:50,224 --> 00:00:52,661
whom I've yet to meet.
25
00:00:52,704 --> 00:00:56,534
Give a warm dobrodosli
to my red carpet gown
26
00:00:56,578 --> 00:00:58,710
for the "Crows" premiere.
27
00:00:58,754 --> 00:01:01,061
- Moira, you didn't tell me
they'd set a date
28
00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:03,019
for the premiere!
- Yes!
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I've been told definitively
it will happen,
30
00:01:05,674 --> 00:01:08,590
and I quote,
"ideally sometime this year."
31
00:01:08,633 --> 00:01:09,982
- Okay, there must be some
mistake here.
32
00:01:10,026 --> 00:01:12,289
This is valued at $3,700.
33
00:01:12,333 --> 00:01:13,856
- What?! $3,700?
34
00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:18,078
- What designer gave you
that kind of discount?
35
00:01:18,121 --> 00:01:20,341
- Sadly, it's not custom
this time around, Alexis.
36
00:01:20,384 --> 00:01:22,778
Mommy had to shop off the rack.
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Fortunately, I discovered
something called
38
00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:27,870
a "promo code."
- This is a reduced price?
39
00:01:27,913 --> 00:01:30,002
- Yes. Discount couture,
do you believe it?
40
00:01:30,046 --> 00:01:32,440
I'm surprised she made it
through customs.
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00:01:32,483 --> 00:01:34,572
- I once passed off a mini
horse and three Guinea pigs
42
00:01:34,616 --> 00:01:37,009
as service animals,
so anything is possible.
43
00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:40,056
- Perfect a spot of tea
for the unveiling.
44
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,450
- I was actually just boiling
water for my bath.
45
00:01:42,493 --> 00:01:44,147
- Does this mean I should start
thinking about my look
46
00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:45,322
for the premiere?
47
00:01:45,366 --> 00:01:47,324
- TBD on the guest list, Alexis,
48
00:01:47,368 --> 00:01:49,587
but I love your enthusiasm.
49
00:01:49,631 --> 00:01:51,154
Box? Box.
50
00:01:52,808 --> 00:01:57,421
♪♪♪
51
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:00,990
David: I'm so glad
we're doing this.
52
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:03,384
We never get to spend
quality time together.
53
00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:05,734
Also, I've been neglecting
my wellness journey,
54
00:02:05,777 --> 00:02:07,736
so the cherry blossoms opening
when we both have time off
55
00:02:07,779 --> 00:02:09,738
is really ticking a lot
of boxes for me.
56
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:11,566
- Are you sure the cherry
blossoms are even open now?
57
00:02:11,609 --> 00:02:13,698
I mean, I thought that wasn't
for another couple weeks.
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00:02:13,742 --> 00:02:15,526
- Mm, no, no, I called
the botanical gardens,
59
00:02:15,570 --> 00:02:17,528
and had the girl send me
a photo.
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00:02:17,572 --> 00:02:19,965
I learned the hard way
from my last trip to Japan.
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00:02:20,009 --> 00:02:22,316
Showed up, no cherry blossoms,
turned right back around,
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it was such a waste.
63
00:02:24,187 --> 00:02:27,016
- Wow, that's a lot of pressure
to put on cherry blossoms.
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00:02:27,059 --> 00:02:28,800
- Well, why else would we be
driving to Elm Valley?
65
00:02:28,844 --> 00:02:30,367
Ooh!
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00:02:33,805 --> 00:02:35,546
Why else would we be driving
to Elm Valley, Stevie?
67
00:02:37,505 --> 00:02:40,203
- The only other reason
I can think of is that...
68
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:42,379
Emir might be there.
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00:02:42,423 --> 00:02:44,599
The hotel reviewer that--
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00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,862
- You had the dirty motel
sex with?
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00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:48,951
- Well, when you put it
that way it sorta cheapens it,
72
00:02:48,994 --> 00:02:51,823
but yes,
he might also be there,
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00:02:51,867 --> 00:02:53,869
reviewing a hotel.
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00:02:53,912 --> 00:02:56,263
- But not the hotel that
we're going to,
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00:02:56,306 --> 00:02:57,786
because that would be
a crazy coincidence.
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00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:03,792
- Sorry, I knew you
wouldn't come
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00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:05,533
if you thought you were
gonna be a third wheel.
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00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:06,925
- Okay well, sucks for him,
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00:03:06,969 --> 00:03:08,623
because I only booked
the private garden tour
80
00:03:08,666 --> 00:03:10,407
for two people.
81
00:03:10,451 --> 00:03:12,148
- Okay, I'm just gonna say it.
- Please don't.
82
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,237
- I don't think we're gonna
go...
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00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:15,978
- No!
- to the botanical gardens.
84
00:03:16,021 --> 00:03:18,198
- Wow! So this is an abduction,
then.
85
00:03:18,241 --> 00:03:22,376
- I am a single woman
driving way out of town
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00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:24,769
to meet a guy I don't know
very well!
87
00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,293
- Well...
88
00:03:26,336 --> 00:03:28,338
- Once he shows up I'm sure
you can still go
89
00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:30,210
to the botanical gardens!
90
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:33,256
- I'm not going to the
botanical gardens by myself!
91
00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:35,432
What, am I gonna walk around,
and admire the cherry blossoms
92
00:03:35,476 --> 00:03:37,826
alone, like some pervert?!
93
00:03:37,869 --> 00:03:39,610
So if you're gonna meet this
guy there,
94
00:03:39,654 --> 00:03:41,264
there where am I staying?
I don't do couches!
95
00:03:41,308 --> 00:03:42,831
- I got you a separate room.
96
00:03:42,874 --> 00:03:44,876
- A separate room, okay.
97
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:46,617
So this has all been
premeditated, then.
98
00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:48,619
You know what,
I hope for your sake,
99
00:03:48,663 --> 00:03:49,707
that they have cherry blossoms
in prison.
100
00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:52,797
[Dog barks]
101
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,192
- Hey Shannon, what's up?
102
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,150
- Ted's in his office,
you can just let yourself in.
103
00:03:58,194 --> 00:03:59,587
- Yikes.
104
00:03:59,630 --> 00:04:01,458
Okay, thank you.
105
00:04:04,722 --> 00:04:08,291
Hey, I know you're really
swamped today,
106
00:04:08,335 --> 00:04:10,119
so I brought you this.
107
00:04:10,162 --> 00:04:11,729
You can thank me later.
- Oh!
108
00:04:11,773 --> 00:04:13,557
- That's decaf, right?
109
00:04:13,601 --> 00:04:15,820
- No, that detail actually
slipped my mind,
110
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:18,170
so maybe I'll just take it.
111
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:20,085
- Oh, almost a sweet gesture,
Alexis, thank you.
112
00:04:20,129 --> 00:04:21,913
- You know who's not sweet?
113
00:04:21,957 --> 00:04:24,133
Old Shan out there.
114
00:04:24,176 --> 00:04:26,701
- Okay, first of all Alexis,
she's not old,
115
00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:28,224
we went to vet school together.
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00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,443
And she's actually been
really helpful this week.
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00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:31,358
- To you.
118
00:04:31,401 --> 00:04:34,491
I'm just gonna say it, Ted.
Most people are a fan.
119
00:04:34,535 --> 00:04:37,015
So when someone's not,
it's usually on them.
120
00:04:37,059 --> 00:04:39,366
- All right, fine, I,
I didn't wanna bring this up,
121
00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:41,890
because it is so not a thing.
122
00:04:43,457 --> 00:04:46,155
But well, when you and I
were broken up,
123
00:04:46,198 --> 00:04:49,637
there was... one night
where Shannon and I...
124
00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:51,900
- [Gasps] Oh my God! Ted!
125
00:04:51,943 --> 00:04:53,641
- [Sighs] We hooked up.
126
00:04:53,684 --> 00:04:55,338
- Yes you did,
you little smooch monster!
127
00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:57,035
- Well, we did a lot more
than that.
128
00:04:57,079 --> 00:04:58,994
- [Gasps] I'm sorry,
should I be jealous?
129
00:04:59,037 --> 00:05:00,822
- No! No, no, no, no, no.
It was just a one-time thing.
130
00:05:00,865 --> 00:05:04,086
- Oh, no.
- No, not "oh no,"
131
00:05:04,129 --> 00:05:06,915
No, I stopped it
from going any further.
132
00:05:06,958 --> 00:05:08,482
Because I thought we were
just better off as friends.
133
00:05:08,525 --> 00:05:10,353
- Beep, beep!
134
00:05:10,397 --> 00:05:12,921
Paging Dr. Casanova
J. Heartbreaker.
135
00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:15,315
- Anyway, that's probably why
she seems like
136
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:17,447
she's a little unsure about
where she stands with you.
137
00:05:17,491 --> 00:05:19,188
- Well, thank you for telling
me that, Ted.
138
00:05:19,231 --> 00:05:21,103
That makes so much more sense
than her not liking me.
139
00:05:21,146 --> 00:05:23,061
- Well, I'm glad that
we could clear that up.
140
00:05:23,105 --> 00:05:26,369
- Okay, well, I will see you
for lunch then,
141
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:28,197
"Doctor".
142
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:30,068
- Yeah, it's funny because
I actually am a doctor.
143
00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:31,722
- So am I...
144
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:34,290
- No, you're not.
Just-just Ted.
145
00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:37,772
Roland: Hey, Johnny!
146
00:05:37,815 --> 00:05:40,905
Johnny! I have some good news
for you, my friend.
147
00:05:40,949 --> 00:05:43,125
- Well, I could use some
good news,
148
00:05:43,168 --> 00:05:45,083
I might have to take out
a mortgage on the dress
149
00:05:45,127 --> 00:05:47,608
my wife just bought.
- Well, uh...
150
00:05:47,651 --> 00:05:49,261
you know that little hot water
problem you're having?
151
00:05:49,305 --> 00:05:51,263
- Yeah?
152
00:05:51,307 --> 00:05:52,787
- Well, I've come up with
the perfect excuse for you
153
00:05:52,830 --> 00:05:55,311
to buy yourself a brand new
hot water heater!
154
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:57,574
- Still waiting for
the good news.
155
00:05:57,618 --> 00:05:59,576
- Well, the good news is that
my friend Terry
156
00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:01,709
can replace the whole thing
for you.
157
00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:03,101
- Replace it?
- Mhmm.
158
00:06:03,145 --> 00:06:04,929
- Well, how much is that
gonna cost?
159
00:06:04,973 --> 00:06:07,236
- I did a little negotiating
with Terry,
160
00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:09,456
and he says you can have it
for $4,200.
161
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:11,632
- $4200?!
- Right.
162
00:06:11,675 --> 00:06:13,460
Unless you want it installed.
163
00:06:13,503 --> 00:06:16,245
- Well, of course I want it
installed, Roland!
164
00:06:16,288 --> 00:06:17,899
- Okay, well, that's gonna be
$5,500.
165
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,640
- Okay, you know what?
166
00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:22,469
I can't afford to throw away
money like that.
167
00:06:22,512 --> 00:06:24,645
- Oh, come on, this coming from
the guy who was just bragging
168
00:06:24,688 --> 00:06:27,256
about taking out a mortgage
to pay for his wife's dress!
169
00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:28,910
- I wasn't bragging!
- Ohhh...
170
00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:30,738
Moira: Well, hello!
171
00:06:30,781 --> 00:06:32,479
Is it just me, or is there
a faint scent of honeysuckle
172
00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,089
in the air?
173
00:06:34,132 --> 00:06:36,526
- Yeah, it might be
Johnny's aftershave.
174
00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:39,311
I'm-I'm sorry, it is pungent.
175
00:06:39,355 --> 00:06:42,489
- And John,
I tried to hang up my gown,
176
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,534
and thank God I caught it
before that silly curtain rod
177
00:06:44,578 --> 00:06:46,754
came crashing down!
178
00:06:46,797 --> 00:06:48,364
- Don't worry about it,
we'll get you a new one.
179
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,671
As soon we get uh,
"El Tightwad" here
180
00:06:50,714 --> 00:06:52,368
to loosen up the purse strings.
181
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,283
- John, give this man a raise!
182
00:06:54,326 --> 00:06:57,329
And when dear, did our room
become so moist?
183
00:06:57,373 --> 00:07:00,768
I'm off to get a dehumidifier,
but I will see you at lunch.
184
00:07:02,596 --> 00:07:04,032
- [Sighs]
185
00:07:04,075 --> 00:07:06,251
[Cars rumble]
186
00:07:06,295 --> 00:07:07,862
[Horn honks]
187
00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:10,473
[Muzak plays, phone rings]
188
00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:14,216
- Oh, is that him?
189
00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:16,174
- No.
- Okay.
190
00:07:17,872 --> 00:07:19,264
- What about the person--
- David, I would tell you
191
00:07:19,308 --> 00:07:20,309
if I saw him!
192
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,661
Also, that's rude!
193
00:07:24,705 --> 00:07:26,837
- Okay, it's just that your
type is very inconsistent.
194
00:07:26,881 --> 00:07:28,578
What time was he supposed
to show up, anyway?
195
00:07:31,625 --> 00:07:33,278
- Two hours ago.
196
00:07:33,322 --> 00:07:34,889
- And we're sure this
is the right hotel?
197
00:07:36,934 --> 00:07:40,068
- He's not coming.
I'm an idiot.
198
00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:43,550
- Well, I guess the good thing
to come out of this abduction
199
00:07:43,593 --> 00:07:45,943
is that if anyone knows
how to crawl out from under
200
00:07:45,987 --> 00:07:48,946
an embarrassing romantic
failure, it's me.
201
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:51,775
So I say we drop our bags,
202
00:07:51,819 --> 00:07:53,516
go straight to the botanical
gardens,
203
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:55,518
take in some cherry blossoms,
204
00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:57,520
then sleep it off,
and go home fresh tomorrow.
205
00:07:57,564 --> 00:07:59,261
- What time was the tour again?
206
00:08:04,179 --> 00:08:06,790
Oh, David, I'm so sorry.
207
00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:09,489
- If this wasn't so humiliating
for you,
208
00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:11,621
I think I'd be in a darker
headspace right now,
209
00:08:11,665 --> 00:08:13,623
but since it is...
210
00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:16,539
the hotel bar has karaoke,
211
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:18,672
I say we get several rounds
of polar bear shots,
212
00:08:18,715 --> 00:08:20,674
load up some Mariah,
213
00:08:20,717 --> 00:08:22,153
and I will spend
the rest of the night
214
00:08:22,197 --> 00:08:23,546
pretending not to resent you.
215
00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:25,592
- Okay.
216
00:08:25,635 --> 00:08:27,245
I'll get the first round.
217
00:08:27,289 --> 00:08:28,116
- Oh, you'll be getting
every round.
218
00:08:29,813 --> 00:08:31,293
- [Sighs]
219
00:08:33,687 --> 00:08:35,166
Alexis: Oh my God, Shan!
You still here?
220
00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:37,473
Have you not taken lunch?
221
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:38,605
- I've just been pretty busy.
222
00:08:38,648 --> 00:08:40,476
- Ugh, same.
223
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,304
Can I get a "hell yeah"
for two hard-working women
224
00:08:42,347 --> 00:08:43,871
in the 21st Century?
225
00:08:43,914 --> 00:08:46,221
- [Weak laugh]
226
00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:49,529
- Anyway, I think
that we both know
227
00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,356
that things are a bit off
between us,
228
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,271
and I understand why.
229
00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:55,012
Ted told me all about
your little...
230
00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:57,145
Mmm! Muah! Muah!
231
00:08:57,188 --> 00:08:59,626
And it's like... not a big deal.
232
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:01,932
- Okay.
233
00:09:01,976 --> 00:09:04,369
Alexis, that's-that's such
a relief.
234
00:09:04,413 --> 00:09:06,850
And oh! Honestly, between us,
235
00:09:06,894 --> 00:09:08,983
it was just a drunken
one-time thing,
236
00:09:09,026 --> 00:09:10,593
and I told him we'd
be better off as friends.
237
00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:12,595
- Oh.
238
00:09:12,639 --> 00:09:14,945
Did you tell him that
after he told you that?
239
00:09:14,989 --> 00:09:16,468
- Sorry?
240
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:18,645
Ted: Alexis. Right on time.
241
00:09:18,688 --> 00:09:21,430
- You're telling me, I was just
having a chat with Shan.
242
00:09:21,473 --> 00:09:23,475
Clearing the air about
that little trip
243
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:25,042
you two took to pound town.
244
00:09:25,086 --> 00:09:27,044
- Alexis!
- Whoa!
245
00:09:27,088 --> 00:09:28,829
Okay, let's remember this
is still a place of work.
246
00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:30,004
- Look, I don't know about you,
Shannon,
247
00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:32,484
but I am so glad we did this.
248
00:09:32,528 --> 00:09:34,051
Had I not talked to her,
I never would've found out
249
00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:36,445
that she called it off.
250
00:09:36,488 --> 00:09:39,361
- Maybe I will go for lunch.
- Well, just, um, one minute.
251
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:42,059
Again, not that it matters,
252
00:09:42,103 --> 00:09:44,584
you know, but uh,
the day after we...
253
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:49,632
um, we were supposed to meet up
at the 5k for Feral Cats,
254
00:09:49,676 --> 00:09:51,591
and... I never followed up so.
255
00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:55,551
- Oh! Yeah, it totally
doesn't matter.
256
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,248
- No.
257
00:09:57,292 --> 00:09:59,511
- But I also never followed up.
258
00:09:59,555 --> 00:10:02,645
So when we saw each other
the next weekend
259
00:10:02,689 --> 00:10:04,952
at the opening of Bronwyn's
Exotic Animal Clinic,
260
00:10:04,995 --> 00:10:07,650
I assumed...
you'd gotten the hint.
261
00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:09,652
- Okay, well, that's what
I assumed, so...
262
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:11,741
- Okay, not to interject,
but I assumed
263
00:10:11,785 --> 00:10:13,656
that this would play out
in a much more interesting way.
264
00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:15,919
So for the sake of time,
265
00:10:15,963 --> 00:10:18,182
um, I'm just gonna go with
Shannon's version of things.
266
00:10:18,226 --> 00:10:20,184
Shannon, can we get you
anything while we're out?
267
00:10:20,228 --> 00:10:21,925
- Uh, I'm not sure that
we actually quite finished
268
00:10:21,969 --> 00:10:23,448
the conversation.
- Oh, it's okay, Ted.
269
00:10:23,492 --> 00:10:25,102
because the important thing is,
270
00:10:25,146 --> 00:10:26,887
that Shannon and I had
a breakthrough.
271
00:10:26,930 --> 00:10:28,279
- Yeah, but I'm just not really
sure where we landed on...
272
00:10:28,323 --> 00:10:29,672
- Mhmm, yeah.
- on the whole...
273
00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:31,848
- Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh! Okay.
274
00:10:31,892 --> 00:10:33,241
[Country music plays]
275
00:10:33,284 --> 00:10:35,199
- When it comes to water heater
repairs,
276
00:10:35,243 --> 00:10:37,332
you don't need electrical
experience to check,
277
00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,160
or replace the heating
elements.
278
00:10:39,203 --> 00:10:40,770
- Great.
279
00:10:40,814 --> 00:10:42,859
- The only thing you need
to do...
280
00:10:42,903 --> 00:10:45,732
is make sure the power is off
before you perform any tests...
281
00:10:45,775 --> 00:10:47,559
- Okay, where's the power
switch?
282
00:10:47,603 --> 00:10:49,257
I need the power switch, okay,
hold on, hold on.
283
00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:51,085
- Find the circuit breaker...
- Power?
284
00:10:51,128 --> 00:10:53,174
I can't get to the circuit
breaker until-hold on!
285
00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:56,046
Slow... slow-hold on!
286
00:10:56,090 --> 00:10:57,961
Hold-st-stop!
[Tutorial keeps talking]
287
00:10:58,005 --> 00:10:59,746
Rewind! How do you rewind?!
288
00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:01,356
Where's the manual?!
289
00:11:01,399 --> 00:11:03,358
- Oh Johnny, there you are!
290
00:11:03,401 --> 00:11:04,707
I've been looking
all over for you.
291
00:11:04,751 --> 00:11:06,840
Urgent question. Um...
292
00:11:06,883 --> 00:11:09,407
what's our policy
on smoke breaks?
293
00:11:09,451 --> 00:11:11,409
- Who's taking a smoke break?
- I am.
294
00:11:11,453 --> 00:11:13,716
- You don't smoke.
- Yeah, I know.
295
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,805
And I don't think I should be
penalized for that.
296
00:11:15,849 --> 00:11:18,329
- Roland, I'm kinda busy right
now with the water heater.
297
00:11:18,373 --> 00:11:20,157
- Johnny, I don't think kicking
298
00:11:20,201 --> 00:11:21,550
that thing is really
gonna help.
299
00:11:21,593 --> 00:11:23,421
LOL.
300
00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:25,293
- Okay, I'm trying
to follow the video here,
301
00:11:25,336 --> 00:11:27,121
it says it's for beginners.
302
00:11:27,164 --> 00:11:29,036
- Yeah well, I think you got
the right video there.
303
00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:30,994
But don't you think something
like that should be handled
304
00:11:31,038 --> 00:11:33,518
by professionals, Johnny?
Like, maybe... Terry?
305
00:11:33,562 --> 00:11:35,651
- Roland, you know something?
306
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:37,784
There's a lot going on
with the family right now,
307
00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:40,308
and if there's an economical
way for me to deal with this,
308
00:11:40,351 --> 00:11:42,614
without pumping more money
into it,
309
00:11:42,658 --> 00:11:44,225
then that's what I'm gonna do!
310
00:11:44,268 --> 00:11:45,574
- Johnny, let me tell you
something.
311
00:11:45,617 --> 00:11:47,445
That is not the place
to cut corners.
312
00:11:47,489 --> 00:11:49,752
Okay? What you need to do
is re-examine
313
00:11:49,796 --> 00:11:51,406
your extravagant lifestyle.
314
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:53,408
- What are you talking about?
315
00:11:53,451 --> 00:11:56,585
- Well, not all of us can drive
around in an 8 cylinder car.
316
00:11:56,628 --> 00:11:59,806
- It's a '78 Lincoln,
and it's all we could afford!
317
00:11:59,849 --> 00:12:02,504
- Right, '78. Vintage.
- Okay!
318
00:12:02,547 --> 00:12:04,245
Roland, do you mind
if I get back to work?!
319
00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:06,160
- Yeah, no problem, I've got
to go on my smoke break.
320
00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:09,729
- [Sighs, loud clang]
321
00:12:12,601 --> 00:12:14,908
♪♪♪
322
00:12:14,951 --> 00:12:17,432
- ♪ As time goes on...
323
00:12:20,391 --> 00:12:22,524
[Song ends]
[Half-hearted applause]
324
00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:24,047
- Wow, for someone
who can barely stand,
325
00:12:24,091 --> 00:12:25,701
she sounds good.
326
00:12:27,094 --> 00:12:29,096
How are we feeling?
327
00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:31,620
- All things considered,
I'm feeling better.
328
00:12:31,663 --> 00:12:33,970
- Good. I'm gonna see
if they have more Mariah,
329
00:12:34,014 --> 00:12:35,537
the first three songs
were just a warm-up.
330
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:38,627
- [Chuckles]
331
00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:41,978
- [Nervous exhale]
332
00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:45,982
- Oh. Hi.
333
00:12:46,026 --> 00:12:48,115
- I'm so sorry.
334
00:12:48,158 --> 00:12:49,812
A student driver rear-ended me
on the way over here,
335
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,596
it was a whole thing.
He started crying.
336
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:52,946
We had to exchange insurance
information.
337
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:54,512
His mom was there.
338
00:12:54,556 --> 00:12:56,079
- You couldn'tve called?
339
00:12:56,123 --> 00:12:58,038
I thought I was stood up.
340
00:12:58,081 --> 00:13:00,040
- The student driver has
my phone, and I have his.
341
00:13:00,083 --> 00:13:01,258
We didn't give them back
to each other
342
00:13:01,302 --> 00:13:03,478
after we exchanged info.
343
00:13:03,521 --> 00:13:05,306
So if you wanna know what's on
a 16 year old's smartphone,
344
00:13:05,349 --> 00:13:06,307
I could offer you that.
345
00:13:06,350 --> 00:13:08,004
- No, thank you.
346
00:13:08,048 --> 00:13:09,876
- Yeah, that's probably
for the best.
347
00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:12,661
- Okay, good news,
they have "Fantasy,"
348
00:13:12,704 --> 00:13:14,489
which means that you get
to play Ol' Dirty Bastard.
349
00:13:16,186 --> 00:13:17,318
- Oh, are-are you here
with someone?
350
00:13:17,361 --> 00:13:20,016
- Uh, no.
- Oh! Ohhh...
351
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:22,105
Oh um, no.
352
00:13:22,149 --> 00:13:24,064
We just ran into each other
at the bar.
353
00:13:24,107 --> 00:13:26,153
Um, long story short, I took
a pottery class with this one.
354
00:13:26,196 --> 00:13:27,719
[Laughs falsely]
355
00:13:27,763 --> 00:13:29,809
- Oh, uh, I'm Emir.
356
00:13:29,852 --> 00:13:32,202
- Oh, Dane...a. Dana.
- Dana?
357
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:35,162
- Yeah, so I run- I run
the karaoke at the hotel.
358
00:13:35,205 --> 00:13:36,511
- Hmm.
- Yeah.
359
00:13:37,991 --> 00:13:40,558
- Uh, Stevie, I know
I'm two hours late,
360
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:42,299
but can I still take you
to dinner,
361
00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:43,344
or have I blown it?
362
00:13:43,387 --> 00:13:45,476
- Oh, you've blown it.
363
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,174
But I'll still take
a free dinner.
364
00:13:47,217 --> 00:13:49,089
- I can work with that, okay.
- Okay.
365
00:13:49,132 --> 00:13:50,568
- Mhmm.
- Okay!
366
00:13:50,612 --> 00:13:53,180
Um, I'm just gonna settle up
my tab,
367
00:13:53,223 --> 00:13:55,095
I'll meet you outside.
- Okay, yeah.
368
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:56,487
Uh, nice to meet you, Dana.
369
00:13:56,531 --> 00:13:58,098
- Yes, thanks.
370
00:14:01,928 --> 00:14:03,886
- Why don't you just
come with us?
371
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:05,975
I already made you miss
the botanical gardens.
372
00:14:06,019 --> 00:14:07,716
I can't leave you here.
373
00:14:07,759 --> 00:14:09,196
- Okay, honestly, I'm gonna be
really exhausted
374
00:14:09,239 --> 00:14:10,675
after my set anyways, so...
375
00:14:10,719 --> 00:14:13,113
I'll probably just go to bed.
376
00:14:13,156 --> 00:14:15,115
- Are you sure?
377
00:14:15,158 --> 00:14:17,813
- No, so get outta here
before I change my mind.
378
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:19,815
- Thank you.
- Okay.
379
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,425
Unnecessary, but...
380
00:14:24,385 --> 00:14:26,169
Keep the mics hot,
I'm comin' in!
381
00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:27,649
[Loud whirring]
382
00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:35,831
- Moira? We need to talk,
sweetheart.
383
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,964
- I'm sorry dear,
is your mouth moving?
384
00:14:38,007 --> 00:14:41,445
- Could you uh, turn off
the dehumidifier for a second?
385
00:14:41,489 --> 00:14:43,317
- Because I can't possibly
386
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,362
hear you over the sound
of the dehumidifier!
387
00:14:45,406 --> 00:14:47,582
- Oh, just-just turn off...
388
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:50,933
[Beeping, whirring stops]
389
00:14:50,977 --> 00:14:54,197
- So, it looks like in addition
to the water heater,
390
00:14:54,241 --> 00:14:56,286
we're gonna have to replace
some of the plumbing.
391
00:14:56,330 --> 00:14:57,897
and the water is so hard,
392
00:14:59,768 --> 00:15:02,423
that Terry said that it's
likely in the next little while
393
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:04,555
we might also need a new...
394
00:15:04,599 --> 00:15:06,731
water softener.
395
00:15:06,775 --> 00:15:08,820
- John, I'm sorry you've had
such a hard day.
396
00:15:08,864 --> 00:15:11,084
- Yeah...
- On the upside,
397
00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:14,478
this gown has exceeded
all expectations.
398
00:15:14,522 --> 00:15:16,872
- Yeah, well that's good,
sweetheart,
399
00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:19,309
that's... that's good.
It's just that um,
400
00:15:19,353 --> 00:15:21,921
you know, with all these costs
piling up,
401
00:15:21,964 --> 00:15:24,184
we might need to take a hard
look at uh,
402
00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:27,274
some of our recent uh...
purchases.
403
00:15:27,317 --> 00:15:29,450
- I told Alexis now
is not the time
404
00:15:29,493 --> 00:15:30,930
to expand that home office.
405
00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:33,454
Not with the price of ink
today.
406
00:15:33,497 --> 00:15:34,890
- Yeah... Moira, look.
407
00:15:36,326 --> 00:15:39,199
The last thing
I want to do is uh...
408
00:15:39,242 --> 00:15:41,549
rain on your parade,
409
00:15:41,592 --> 00:15:43,246
but I think for the next
little while,
410
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:45,857
any money coming in
should probably...
411
00:15:45,901 --> 00:15:47,903
be for the family.
412
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:50,166
- This dress is for the family.
413
00:15:50,210 --> 00:15:53,561
To remind us that our futures
lie outside this town.
414
00:15:53,604 --> 00:15:55,519
It feels these days
like I'm the only one
415
00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:57,347
who hasn't veered off course.
416
00:15:57,391 --> 00:15:59,001
- Well, no one's veering
off course, Moira,
417
00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:02,004
we're all just uh...
taking a different approach.
418
00:16:03,745 --> 00:16:05,442
- The ceremonial purchase
of the gown
419
00:16:05,486 --> 00:16:07,618
has always been
my good luck charm.
420
00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:10,404
- Well, from everything you've
told us about this movie,
421
00:16:10,447 --> 00:16:13,668
Moira, it sounds like for
the first time in a long time,
422
00:16:13,711 --> 00:16:15,844
you may not need any luck.
423
00:16:15,887 --> 00:16:18,890
- Oh, John! Thank you for that.
424
00:16:18,934 --> 00:16:21,197
And know that you've
been heard!
425
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:22,764
- Good.
426
00:16:22,807 --> 00:16:24,896
[Beeps, loud whirring]
427
00:16:32,121 --> 00:16:34,036
Ted: You know, Alexis,
I've been thinking about it,
428
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:36,386
and... I'm really glad
that you and Shannon
429
00:16:36,430 --> 00:16:38,388
were able to get everything
out in the open.
430
00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:41,261
- Me too. We're actually
grabbing drinks tomorrow.
431
00:16:41,304 --> 00:16:43,306
- Great, yeah, you know,
and I-I...
432
00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:47,049
I care way more about that
than any of the details
433
00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:49,399
of how we ended things,
434
00:16:49,443 --> 00:16:52,489
or even whether
they were accurate.
435
00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:54,230
- It seems like it was just
like a little miscommunication
436
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:55,753
on your part, is all.
437
00:16:55,797 --> 00:16:58,582
- Yeah well, uh, Shannon aside,
438
00:16:58,626 --> 00:17:00,106
I think it's important
that I tell you
439
00:17:00,149 --> 00:17:02,325
that there were a few others
before Heather.
440
00:17:02,369 --> 00:17:04,632
And there may have been
441
00:17:04,675 --> 00:17:06,590
a couple of broken hearts
along the way.
442
00:17:06,634 --> 00:17:08,766
- Whatever you say, Ted.
443
00:17:10,812 --> 00:17:12,901
- Yeah... it's actually
kinda funny,
444
00:17:12,944 --> 00:17:15,034
because I was just going
through my phone,
445
00:17:15,077 --> 00:17:16,644
you know, to make some space,
and then I came across
446
00:17:16,687 --> 00:17:18,559
this little back and forth
from a while ago.
447
00:17:18,602 --> 00:17:20,387
- I believe you, Ted.
448
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,432
You're still Dr. Casanova to me.
449
00:17:22,476 --> 00:17:24,347
- Okay, well, the tone
of your voice
450
00:17:24,391 --> 00:17:26,088
makes it seem like you don't
believe a word you're saying.
451
00:17:26,132 --> 00:17:27,133
- Okay, Ted!
452
00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:28,438
[Clears her throat]
453
00:17:30,571 --> 00:17:32,355
[Reads] "Dear Melanie."
454
00:17:32,399 --> 00:17:34,879
Melanie? Is this the girl
from the falafel place?
455
00:17:34,923 --> 00:17:36,925
- Yeah, I don't think
that's relevant.
456
00:17:36,968 --> 00:17:39,232
- Ahem. "I've had a lot of fun
hanging out with you,
457
00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:41,712
and I really...
458
00:17:41,756 --> 00:17:44,063
fal-awful saying this
over text,
459
00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:48,110
but I'm just not feeling
strongly enough to take
460
00:17:48,154 --> 00:17:51,026
this to the next level.
I'm sorry."
461
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:53,507
- Pretty harsh.
But it had to be done.
462
00:17:53,550 --> 00:17:55,944
- And then um, she wrote...
463
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,076
- Oh, it doesn't matter
what she wrote.
464
00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:59,556
- "Cool!" Exclamation mark.
465
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,385
And it looks like you ended up
walking her dog for her?
466
00:18:02,429 --> 00:18:04,735
- [Sighs] Well, she seemed
really upset.
467
00:18:04,779 --> 00:18:07,347
- Listen Ted,
468
00:18:07,390 --> 00:18:09,175
I've gone through enough
heartbreakers for like,
469
00:18:09,218 --> 00:18:11,351
two people's lifetimes.
470
00:18:11,394 --> 00:18:13,440
And I don't want that anymore.
471
00:18:13,483 --> 00:18:15,094
I want you.
472
00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:18,097
And that cute lil' butt.
473
00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:24,625
David and Tammy: ♪ Ohhhh...
474
00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:26,453
- Oh! Oh!
475
00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:28,498
- Yes, Tammy!
Tammy, everybody!
476
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:30,544
It's Tammy! Yeah!
477
00:18:30,587 --> 00:18:32,328
[Gasps] Stevie, hi!
478
00:18:32,372 --> 00:18:33,851
Oh...
479
00:18:33,895 --> 00:18:36,898
Hi!
- Hi.
480
00:18:36,941 --> 00:18:40,380
So... Emir asked me if I wanted
to stay the night.
481
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:43,426
- Ohhhh! [Laughs drunkenly]
482
00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:45,167
That sounds promising.
483
00:18:45,211 --> 00:18:48,039
- Yeah. Um, I thought
you were gonna go to bed?
484
00:18:48,083 --> 00:18:50,825
- Oh no, I was, but then Tammy
kept buying shots,
485
00:18:50,868 --> 00:18:53,654
and the whole room got behind
me in like, a really big way.
486
00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:55,612
Anyway, I have seven
more songs to finish,
487
00:18:55,656 --> 00:18:57,136
and some new fans who would be
very disappointed
488
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:58,833
if I don't close the show.
489
00:18:58,876 --> 00:19:02,184
- Oh, Dana! Or is it David?
- Huh?
490
00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:03,707
- Listen, I just wanted you
to know that Stevie told me
491
00:19:03,751 --> 00:19:05,100
what you did for her tonight.
492
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:06,362
You know, giving up
your evening,
493
00:19:06,406 --> 00:19:07,755
so that we could have
some time together.
494
00:19:07,798 --> 00:19:10,105
Anyway, it was really cool
of you to do it,
495
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:11,759
is what I'm saying,
and not just because um...
496
00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:13,239
we get to have a little
sleepover because of it.
497
00:19:13,282 --> 00:19:15,328
- [Makes retching sound, laughs]
498
00:19:15,371 --> 00:19:17,330
- So to say thank you, I took
care of your room charges.
499
00:19:17,373 --> 00:19:18,722
- Oh my God! Hello!
500
00:19:20,463 --> 00:19:22,465
Um, hi! Can I get another
drink then,
501
00:19:22,509 --> 00:19:24,075
to the room, please? Thanks!
502
00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:25,773
- I actually just meant like,
your mini-bar.
503
00:19:25,816 --> 00:19:28,341
- Oh no, I finished that.
Hey, Tam!
504
00:19:28,384 --> 00:19:30,038
You want some zhampagne?!
505
00:19:30,081 --> 00:19:32,083
Yeah, two please, drinks.
506
00:19:32,127 --> 00:19:34,260
- Okay, um... what do you say
we get up there,
507
00:19:34,303 --> 00:19:36,349
maybe do a little duet? I feel
like that's the kind of thing
508
00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:38,002
you'd be totally comfortable
with, right?
509
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:39,830
- Mhmm...
- Yeah, love that.
510
00:19:39,874 --> 00:19:41,571
I think it's best if you guys
just sat down, and watched.
511
00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:43,356
- Oh, okay.
- Next time.
512
00:19:43,399 --> 00:19:45,053
- Yeah. Mhmm.
- Off the hook for now.
513
00:19:45,096 --> 00:19:46,750
- Uno, Tammy! I think I'm going
to do this one by myself.
514
00:19:46,794 --> 00:19:48,230
- Oh!
- Thank you so much, though.
515
00:19:48,274 --> 00:19:50,058
We'll call you back.
- Wow.
516
00:19:50,101 --> 00:19:51,886
- See you soon. I would like
to dedicate this one...
517
00:19:51,929 --> 00:19:54,105
to the lovers right over there!
518
00:19:54,149 --> 00:19:55,585
- Okay...
- And, goodnight.
519
00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:57,065
David: The la-la-lovers...
Cue it up!
520
00:20:00,808 --> 00:20:02,723
- Okay, are you coming out?
521
00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:03,985
- Can you stop yelling, please?!
522
00:20:04,028 --> 00:20:06,205
I had 14 polar bear shots
last night.
523
00:20:06,248 --> 00:20:08,468
- Moira, do you want us
to close our eyes?
524
00:20:08,511 --> 00:20:10,644
[Door latch clicks]
525
00:20:10,687 --> 00:20:11,819
[Dress rustles]
526
00:20:15,953 --> 00:20:17,999
- Oh my God.
527
00:20:19,435 --> 00:20:22,264
- Moira, it's gorgeous.
528
00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:25,702
- Wasn't it shown with a veil?
529
00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:27,356
- Oh, the veil's on its way.
530
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:30,272
- Well, now that I see it
on you, I understand!
531
00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:32,143
I feel like I'm waiting
for the limo
532
00:20:32,187 --> 00:20:34,885
to take us to your next
red carpet event!
533
00:20:34,929 --> 00:20:37,105
Well, sweetheart, if that's...
534
00:20:37,148 --> 00:20:40,108
if that's the dress you want,
then, uh...
535
00:20:40,151 --> 00:20:43,154
- It is. But you're right,
John, it's not the time.
536
00:20:43,198 --> 00:20:46,157
So before I send her back,
take a mental picture.
537
00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:48,247
[Sighs]
538
00:20:51,337 --> 00:20:53,904
And perhaps an actual
picture as well?
539
00:20:53,948 --> 00:20:56,385
Anyone have a camera?
- Oh.
540
00:20:56,429 --> 00:20:58,605
- Yes, yes.
- Oh yes.
541
00:20:58,648 --> 00:21:01,085
- Gimme like, a mm!
- Mm!
542
00:21:01,129 --> 00:21:02,348
[Camera clicks]
- Like, arm.
543
00:21:02,391 --> 00:21:04,828
- Oh!
- Okay.
544
00:21:04,872 --> 00:21:06,003
- Yeah, got it?
[Camera clicks]
545
00:21:07,309 --> 00:21:09,485
Okay, that's it.
546
00:21:09,529 --> 00:21:11,661
And if all goes to plan, we'll
meet again on the red carpet.
547
00:21:11,705 --> 00:21:14,360
Ideally, sometime this year.
548
00:21:14,403 --> 00:21:15,970
- And those are the shoes
we're going with?
549
00:21:16,013 --> 00:21:18,189
- What do you think? No.
550
00:21:18,233 --> 00:21:20,627
Shoes, later.
As well as jewels.
551
00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:22,281
[David and Alexis gasp]
- What?!
41320
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