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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,638 --> 00:00:07,340 - guys with kidsis taped 2 00:00:07,374 --> 00:00:08,541 In front 3 00:00:07,374 --> 00:00:08,541 Of a live studio audience. 4 00:00:08,575 --> 00:00:10,100 - guess what I just got 5 00:00:08,575 --> 00:00:10,100 Invited to. 6 00:00:10,430 --> 00:00:12,979 My own son's 7 00:00:10,430 --> 00:00:12,979 First birthday party. 8 00:00:13,130 --> 00:00:14,714 Sheila organized the whole thing 9 00:00:13,130 --> 00:00:14,714 Without me. 10 00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:16,750 She completely left me 11 00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:16,750 Out of it, 12 00:00:16,783 --> 00:00:18,551 And she's forcing me 13 00:00:16,783 --> 00:00:18,551 To write a poem 14 00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:21,154 With, "No diaper humor." 15 00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:22,622 - I'm sorry. I just want 16 00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:22,622 To get this straight. 17 00:00:22,655 --> 00:00:25,859 So you are going to recite 18 00:00:22,655 --> 00:00:25,859 A poem to a one-year-old 19 00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:28,595 At a birthday party 20 00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:28,595 Thrown by your ex-wife 21 00:00:28,628 --> 00:00:33,266 And her serious boyfriend, 22 00:00:28,628 --> 00:00:33,266 Kareem abdul-jabbar. 23 00:00:33,299 --> 00:00:35,235 - yes, and it's gonna be 24 00:00:33,299 --> 00:00:35,235 Terrible. 25 00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:39,572 She's having a string quartet 26 00:00:35,268 --> 00:00:39,572 And a pinata full of raisins. 27 00:00:39,606 --> 00:00:42,409 - hey, look, man, do something 28 00:00:39,606 --> 00:00:42,409 To liven it up, all right? 29 00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:44,444 When yoda 30 00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:44,444 Had his first birthday party, 31 00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:47,130 We had a band play, and then 32 00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:47,130 Clarkie was born second, 33 00:00:47,470 --> 00:00:49,516 So we had the radio playing, 34 00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:52,252 And I think 35 00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:52,252 We completely forgot 36 00:00:52,285 --> 00:00:54,821 About you guys' first birthday 37 00:00:52,285 --> 00:00:54,821 Party altogether. 38 00:00:54,854 --> 00:00:56,222 Sorry. 39 00:00:56,256 --> 00:00:57,824 - I wish I could do something, 40 00:00:57,857 --> 00:00:59,426 But sheila is so controlling. 41 00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,428 She won't even let me 42 00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,428 Make ernie a cake. 43 00:01:01,461 --> 00:01:03,763 My dad always made me a cake 44 00:01:01,461 --> 00:01:03,763 On my birthday. 45 00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:06,533 - your dad still makes you 46 00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:06,533 A cake on your birthday. 47 00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:08,902 - I'm his little man. 48 00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:10,603 - you know what? 49 00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:10,603 You are divorced. 50 00:01:10,637 --> 00:01:12,605 I think you should take 51 00:01:10,637 --> 00:01:12,605 Advantage of that-- 52 00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:14,607 Throw your own party. 53 00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:14,607 - hey! There you go. 54 00:01:14,641 --> 00:01:16,343 - you're absolutely right. 55 00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:18,378 I-I'm free of her. 56 00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:18,378 I can throw the party I want. 57 00:01:18,411 --> 00:01:21,614 I can write the poem I want. 58 00:01:21,648 --> 00:01:24,617 I don't have to write a poem. 59 00:01:21,648 --> 00:01:24,617 [laughs] 60 00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:26,286 - [babbling] 61 00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:26,286 - yeah! 62 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:27,654 [chuckles] 63 00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:30,590 - * life is 64 00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:30,590 How you live it * 65 00:01:30,623 --> 00:01:32,459 - * ooh * 66 00:01:32,491 --> 00:01:35,228 - * wake up 67 00:01:32,491 --> 00:01:35,228 Where you wanna be * 68 00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:36,663 - * hey, hey * 69 00:01:36,696 --> 00:01:38,664 - * you and me * 70 00:01:36,696 --> 00:01:38,664 - * ooh * 71 00:01:38,698 --> 00:01:41,468 - * we're happy * 72 00:01:38,698 --> 00:01:41,468 - * ooh, hey * 73 00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:43,937 - * we need our friends 74 00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:43,937 Like the sun * 75 00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:45,604 - * everybody singin' * 76 00:01:45,638 --> 00:01:48,541 - * why would you walk 77 00:01:45,638 --> 00:01:48,541 When you can run? * 78 00:01:48,575 --> 00:01:50,210 - * everybody singin' * 79 00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:52,345 - * why would you walk 80 00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:52,345 When you can run? * 81 00:01:58,718 --> 00:02:01,521 - chicken nugget on the floor! 82 00:01:58,718 --> 00:02:01,521 [laughs] 83 00:02:01,554 --> 00:02:02,856 I call these jumpers. 84 00:02:02,889 --> 00:02:05,725 They try to get away, 85 00:02:02,889 --> 00:02:05,725 But, oh, no! 86 00:02:08,828 --> 00:02:10,130 - what are you doing? 87 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:13,833 - what? 88 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:13,833 - that was on the floor! 89 00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:17,237 - so? You're eating 90 00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:17,237 Out of the sink. 91 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:24,577 - oh, my god. 92 00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:26,546 I am! 93 00:02:26,579 --> 00:02:30,550 [sighs] 94 00:02:26,579 --> 00:02:30,550 You and I are gross. 95 00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:35,321 We eat our meals, and then 96 00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:35,321 We finish our kids' meals. 97 00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:38,692 - I sometimes eat goldfish from 98 00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:38,692 The bottom of the diaper bag. 99 00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,464 - you know, gary, this is why 100 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:47,300 We don't have 101 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:47,300 Any energy anymore... 102 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:50,870 Like those young, 103 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:50,870 Healthy people. 104 00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:53,540 - we can still jump 105 00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:53,540 Like that, right? 106 00:02:53,573 --> 00:02:56,609 - absolutely. 107 00:02:53,573 --> 00:02:56,609 - look, give me your hand. 108 00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:58,345 All right, ready? 109 00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:58,345 - yes! 110 00:02:58,378 --> 00:02:59,412 - I'm gonna go. 111 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:02,148 [both grunt] 112 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,884 Did you jump? 113 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,884 - I thought I did. 114 00:03:04,918 --> 00:03:06,586 - [groans] 115 00:03:06,619 --> 00:03:09,289 Oh, we let those people down. 116 00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:13,193 - I can't even look my old self 117 00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:13,193 In the eye. 118 00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:17,197 We need to detox 119 00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:17,197 And clean out our systems. 120 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:21,568 - does that mean 121 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:21,568 We have to give up calzones? 122 00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:23,403 - yeah. 123 00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:23,403 - [groans] 124 00:03:23,436 --> 00:03:25,605 This just got real. 125 00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,209 - okay, e-vite's 126 00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,209 Ready to go out. 127 00:03:29,242 --> 00:03:31,911 Done! 128 00:03:29,242 --> 00:03:31,911 - wait. You invited sheila? 129 00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:33,913 - only because I know 130 00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:33,913 She can't make it this weekend. 131 00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:36,516 She's antiquing with kareem. 132 00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:36,516 - oh. 133 00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:40,860 I love that show. 134 00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:40,860 - [chuckles] 135 00:03:40,860 --> 00:03:41,988 I remember a time 136 00:03:40,860 --> 00:03:41,988 When you two got along. 137 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:44,557 - I know. I know. 138 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:44,557 It was so great. 139 00:03:44,591 --> 00:03:46,426 You know, she was everything 140 00:03:44,591 --> 00:03:46,426 I ever wanted. 141 00:03:46,459 --> 00:03:49,396 She was gorgeous and smart, 142 00:03:46,459 --> 00:03:49,396 And she challenged me. 143 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:53,600 The problem is she challenged me 144 00:03:49,429 --> 00:03:53,600 About everything all the time. 145 00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:55,902 I'm allowed to like chocolate 146 00:03:53,633 --> 00:03:55,902 And vanilla the exact same. 147 00:03:55,935 --> 00:03:58,405 They're my taste buds. 148 00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:00,740 - hey. 149 00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:00,740 All: ernie! 150 00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,475 - and sheila. 151 00:04:02,509 --> 00:04:05,211 Hey, chris, 152 00:04:02,509 --> 00:04:05,211 What is this e-vite I just got? 153 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,781 - oh, I decided to throw my own 154 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,781 Party for ernie this weekend. 155 00:04:07,814 --> 00:04:09,616 I'll come to yours. 156 00:04:07,814 --> 00:04:09,616 You come to mine. 157 00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:11,651 - but I'm out of town 158 00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:11,651 With kareem this weekend. 159 00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:13,586 - yes! 160 00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:15,588 No, I'm sorry. 161 00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:20,260 I was just saying "Yes" 162 00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:20,260 Because you can't come. 163 00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:22,629 - well, I guess 164 00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:22,629 If you want to throw 165 00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:24,898 An unofficial birthday party, 166 00:04:22,662 --> 00:04:24,898 That's fine. 167 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:28,268 - why is mine unofficial? 168 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:28,268 - it's not on his birthday. 169 00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:29,969 - but it's still 170 00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:29,969 A birthday party. 171 00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:31,371 - yes, an unofficial 172 00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:31,371 Birthday party, 173 00:04:31,404 --> 00:04:33,730 Which is why I gave 174 00:04:31,404 --> 00:04:33,730 My blessing. 175 00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:34,874 - we're not married. Don't need 176 00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:34,874 Your blessing anymore. 177 00:04:34,908 --> 00:04:36,543 - all right, sheila. 178 00:04:36,576 --> 00:04:38,745 So just to be clear, we will 179 00:04:36,576 --> 00:04:38,745 Not see you next weekend 180 00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,413 At ernie's 181 00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,413 Unofficial birthday party 182 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,382 For which we have 183 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,382 Your blessing. 184 00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,918 - yes, thank you 185 00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,918 For understanding. 186 00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:48,788 She went to colgate, 187 00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:48,788 And she gets it. 188 00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:52,726 - bye, ernie. 189 00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:52,726 - and sheila! 190 00:04:52,759 --> 00:04:54,494 - here we go. 191 00:04:54,527 --> 00:04:57,970 All-kale diet. 192 00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:02,350 - maybe all we need 193 00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:02,350 Is a good night's sleep. 194 00:05:02,350 --> 00:05:04,700 - when's that 195 00:05:02,350 --> 00:05:04,700 Gonna happen, huh? 196 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:08,410 Because these two have sworn 197 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:08,410 To kill us through exhaustion. 198 00:05:08,410 --> 00:05:09,676 - all right. 199 00:05:08,410 --> 00:05:09,676 Hit it. 200 00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:11,511 - all right. 201 00:05:17,830 --> 00:05:20,530 - that's not bad. 202 00:05:17,830 --> 00:05:20,530 - mm! 203 00:05:20,530 --> 00:05:23,560 - how many days? 204 00:05:20,530 --> 00:05:23,560 - six. 205 00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:24,290 - okay. 206 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,959 We can do it. 207 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,959 - mm. 208 00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:28,328 - we made it through that 209 00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:28,328 Habitat for humanity vacation 210 00:05:28,361 --> 00:05:29,696 You planned. 211 00:05:29,729 --> 00:05:32,650 [scoffs] We can make it 212 00:05:29,729 --> 00:05:32,650 Through anything. 213 00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,334 - hey, I thought we got to keep 214 00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,334 The house. 215 00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:38,905 Who pays to build a house 216 00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:38,905 For somebody else? 217 00:05:38,938 --> 00:05:40,774 - mommy, I'm full. 218 00:05:38,938 --> 00:05:40,774 - me too. 219 00:05:40,807 --> 00:05:43,777 - okay, all right. 220 00:05:40,807 --> 00:05:43,777 I got it. 221 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,881 - mm-mm. Put it down. 222 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,881 Put it down. 223 00:05:47,914 --> 00:05:50,417 Put it down. 224 00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:57,490 - blue for you. 225 00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,858 There you go. 226 00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:01,861 And booze for you. 227 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:06,199 A little more. 228 00:06:06,232 --> 00:06:07,600 There you go. 229 00:06:06,232 --> 00:06:07,600 Okay. 230 00:06:07,634 --> 00:06:10,700 Mmm. Mmm. 231 00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,372 Hey, buddy. 232 00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:12,372 Hey, come here. 233 00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:14,908 Oh, my, my. 234 00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:14,908 - is ernie having a good time? 235 00:06:14,941 --> 00:06:19,479 - oh, the greatest! 236 00:06:14,941 --> 00:06:19,479 Can't you tell? 237 00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:21,915 - hey, sweetie, what are you 238 00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:21,915 Getting there, a unicorn? 239 00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:26,653 - no! A skeleton with a snake 240 00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:26,653 Coming out of its eye. 241 00:06:26,686 --> 00:06:31,124 - oh, I am not gonna like 242 00:06:26,686 --> 00:06:31,124 Any of your boyfriends, am I? 243 00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:33,693 - so, chris, 244 00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:33,693 Did you make your cake? 245 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,762 - yeah! Yeah, me and ernie 246 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,762 Did it last night. 247 00:06:35,795 --> 00:06:38,640 Look. 248 00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:39,899 Huh? 249 00:06:39,933 --> 00:06:41,634 Actually, we made four. 250 00:06:41,668 --> 00:06:44,771 This is the one that agreed 251 00:06:41,668 --> 00:06:44,771 To become a cake. 252 00:06:44,804 --> 00:06:46,773 [door opens] 253 00:06:44,804 --> 00:06:46,773 - hi! 254 00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:49,109 All right, 255 00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:49,109 You guys remember the rule? 256 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,213 Both: don't bother you 257 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:53,213 Unless we're bleeding. 258 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,715 - okay, move out. 259 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,617 - can I get you guys a beer? 260 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,617 Both: nope. 261 00:06:57,650 --> 00:07:00,653 - the only thing 262 00:06:57,650 --> 00:07:00,653 That goes inside our body 263 00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:03,230 Is kale. 264 00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:06,260 - day four, 265 00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:06,260 And never felt better. 266 00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:08,728 That cake... 267 00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:08,728 Doesn't even look good to me. 268 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:11,431 - [chuckles] Baby, 269 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:11,431 That cake doesn't look good 270 00:07:11,464 --> 00:07:13,833 To anybody. 271 00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,537 - all right, ernie. 272 00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,537 It's your special day, 273 00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:19,639 So I'm gonna let you try 274 00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:19,639 Your first lollipop. 275 00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:20,940 There you go. 276 00:07:21,410 --> 00:07:23,777 - happy unofficial birthday, 277 00:07:21,410 --> 00:07:23,777 Ernie! 278 00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:25,645 - sheila, what are you 279 00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:25,645 Doing here? 280 00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:29,820 - well, kareem and I-- 281 00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:29,820 We had a change of plans, so... 282 00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:31,418 - so he dumped you? 283 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:34,220 - well, apparently, if you want 284 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:34,220 To date kareem abdul-jabbar, 285 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:37,424 You have to check your opinions 286 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:37,424 At the door. 287 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,893 - so he really did dump you? 288 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,893 I was just winging it there. 289 00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:42,829 [laughs] 290 00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:42,829 All right, I guessed it! 291 00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:45,632 - it's for the best, because 292 00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:45,632 I should be here for ernie. 293 00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:47,834 Oh, oh, no, no, no, no, honey. 294 00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:47,834 No, no, no. 295 00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:51,710 Choking hazard. 296 00:07:51,710 --> 00:07:53,673 - wow, she literally 297 00:07:51,710 --> 00:07:53,673 Just took candy 298 00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:56,242 From a baby. 299 00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:58,244 - [laughs] 300 00:07:58,278 --> 00:08:00,130 Who made this cake? 301 00:07:58,278 --> 00:08:00,130 Miss havisham? 302 00:08:00,130 --> 00:08:02,716 [laughs] 303 00:08:02,749 --> 00:08:04,784 it's great expectations. 304 00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,654 It's dickens. 305 00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,654 Read a book. 306 00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:09,589 - so sheila's here. 307 00:08:09,622 --> 00:08:12,292 Yay! 308 00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:22,135 - what'll it be, freddy? 309 00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:22,135 What'd you say? 310 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,670 Oh, really? 311 00:08:23,703 --> 00:08:28,410 I mean, you got 45. 312 00:08:23,703 --> 00:08:28,410 I think you should stop, buddy. 313 00:08:28,740 --> 00:08:29,442 Okay, one more card. 314 00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:30,710 - chris, I'm glad I'm here, 315 00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:32,345 Because I really 316 00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:32,345 Don't want ernie 317 00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:34,147 Getting one of those tattoos. 318 00:08:34,179 --> 00:08:36,490 - oh. 319 00:08:36,490 --> 00:08:39,520 Okay. Too late! 320 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,570 - no. 321 00:08:44,570 --> 00:08:47,527 No, I don't-- 322 00:08:44,570 --> 00:08:47,527 I don't like this. 323 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,731 - why don't we just kick her 324 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,731 Out of here? 325 00:08:51,765 --> 00:08:53,700 - I can't. 326 00:08:51,765 --> 00:08:53,700 I don't want to ruin the party 327 00:08:53,733 --> 00:08:56,369 With one of our classic 328 00:08:53,733 --> 00:08:56,369 Party-ruining fights. 329 00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:58,304 Remember ernie's christening? 330 00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:00,140 She threw my grandma's 331 00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:00,140 Punch bowl against the wall. 332 00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:01,775 I'm not saying 333 00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:01,775 That's what killed my grandma, 334 00:09:01,808 --> 00:09:04,711 But "Punch bowl" 335 00:09:01,808 --> 00:09:04,711 Were her last words. 336 00:09:04,744 --> 00:09:06,780 - okay, we just need 337 00:09:04,744 --> 00:09:06,780 To contain her, right? 338 00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:08,481 We got to put somebody 339 00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:08,481 On full-time sheila duty. 340 00:09:08,515 --> 00:09:10,150 - uh, not it. 341 00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:12,519 Kind of hitting 342 00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:12,519 The kale wall here. 343 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,320 One whiff 344 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,320 Of her coconut conditioner, 345 00:09:14,354 --> 00:09:18,525 I just might eat the hair 346 00:09:14,354 --> 00:09:18,525 Off her head. 347 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:20,527 - we'll do it fair and square. 348 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:20,527 Hey, emily! Come here! 349 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,280 Let's play "High card wins." 350 00:09:22,620 --> 00:09:23,530 - oh, wins what? 351 00:09:22,620 --> 00:09:23,530 - the prize. 352 00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:26,866 - okay. 353 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,736 Oh, I got an ace, suckas! 354 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,736 What's my prize? 355 00:09:29,769 --> 00:09:31,705 - you are on sheila duty. 356 00:09:34,607 --> 00:09:37,577 You got to stop her from ruining 357 00:09:34,607 --> 00:09:37,577 The party for chris. 358 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:39,813 - damn it! Come on! 359 00:09:39,846 --> 00:09:44,451 - love you. 360 00:09:39,846 --> 00:09:44,451 - nope! 361 00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,353 - hey, let's do this-- 362 00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,353 First baby to fall wins. 363 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,540 - okay. 364 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,540 - ready? 365 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:49,723 - and... 366 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:49,723 Yep! 367 00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:51,558 - fall down. 368 00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:51,558 All: oh! 369 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,727 - g.J. Won! 370 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,727 My boy won! 371 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,261 - kareem wasn't rejecting me. 372 00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,397 He was rejecting the me 373 00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,397 I was with him, 374 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,733 And I was just a reflection 375 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,733 Of who he was. 376 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:01,568 So, if you're smart, 377 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:01,568 You realize 378 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:04,704 He was just breaking up 379 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:04,704 With himself. 380 00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:12,312 - maybe it's the kale... 381 00:10:12,345 --> 00:10:14,481 But, what? 382 00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:18,585 [doorbell rings] 383 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,420 - hi. I got a delivery here 384 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,420 For sheila. 385 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:21,855 - great. 386 00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:24,257 Okay, could you bring this 387 00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:24,257 Into the kitchen for me? 388 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,592 - what is this? 389 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,794 - well, just because this 390 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,794 Is a fake party, 391 00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:31,531 It still needs a real cake. 392 00:10:31,564 --> 00:10:33,633 Consider this my contribution. 393 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,802 - sheila, we don't need a cake. 394 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,802 I already baked one. 395 00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:37,637 - oh, chris. 396 00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:40,740 Let's not get into what is 397 00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:40,740 And what isn't a cake. 398 00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:43,643 Okay. 399 00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,245 Uh, now, 400 00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,245 Where's your cake plate? 401 00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,280 - you know damn well 402 00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,280 You got both cake plates 403 00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,182 In the divorce. 404 00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:50,383 - um, uh, gary? 405 00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:50,383 - mm-hmm? 406 00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:52,852 - would you hold this? 407 00:10:52,886 --> 00:10:54,621 - of course. 408 00:10:52,886 --> 00:10:54,621 - thank you. 409 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:57,323 I will be right back down. 410 00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,127 - the whole point of this party 411 00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,127 Was for me to do it 412 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,430 My way without her, 413 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,430 And now she's ruining it. 414 00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:04,931 - you know what? 415 00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:06,666 I think I have an idea 416 00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:06,666 Of how to get rid of sheila. 417 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,335 She's only here because kareem 418 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,335 Dumped her, right? 419 00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:09,836 - right. 420 00:11:09,869 --> 00:11:11,838 - so we could send kareem 421 00:11:09,869 --> 00:11:11,838 A text from her phone 422 00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:13,840 Apologizing for being 423 00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:13,840 So overbearing 424 00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:15,608 And asking him 425 00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:15,608 To come pick her up. 426 00:11:15,642 --> 00:11:17,344 - that could work. 427 00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,212 - she should also apologize 428 00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,212 For always telling me 429 00:11:19,245 --> 00:11:21,281 How handsome I look. 430 00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:29,155 - I got frosting 431 00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:29,155 On my finger. 432 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:31,257 - eat it. 433 00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:32,659 Eat that frosting. 434 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,362 Get me off this kale train. 435 00:11:38,264 --> 00:11:40,333 - [groans] 436 00:11:38,264 --> 00:11:40,333 No. 437 00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,335 I'm staying strong 438 00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,335 For the both of us. 439 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:44,270 Look, just two more days. 440 00:11:44,304 --> 00:11:47,440 - two more days? 441 00:11:44,304 --> 00:11:47,440 - mm-hmm. 442 00:11:47,474 --> 00:11:50,744 - how many days is that? 443 00:11:52,579 --> 00:11:54,814 - I don't know! 444 00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,649 Oh, god! 445 00:11:56,683 --> 00:11:59,352 What's happening to us? 446 00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,688 - you know, the farther I get 447 00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,688 From my breakup with kareem, 448 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:05,291 The more I enjoy being alone, 449 00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,494 Which is not the same 450 00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,494 As being lonely. 451 00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:09,329 I mean, I have ernie. 452 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:10,697 I have my work. 453 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,967 I feel like 454 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,967 I have you guys now. 455 00:12:14,670 --> 00:12:17,700 I'm sheila, by the way. 456 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:18,672 - we just need 457 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:18,672 To get her phone. 458 00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:20,507 Everybody knows 459 00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:20,507 What they're doing? 460 00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:21,908 - yeah. 461 00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:21,908 - mm-hmm. 462 00:12:21,941 --> 00:12:23,677 - okay. Gary, go. 463 00:12:21,941 --> 00:12:23,677 That's a go on gary. 464 00:12:23,710 --> 00:12:25,612 Gary's a go. 465 00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:30,550 - hmm. 466 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,552 Hey, sheila. 467 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,552 - hi. 468 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,355 - you know, that is 469 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,355 A lovely purse you have there. 470 00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:36,723 - thank you, gary. 471 00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:36,723 - mm-hmm. 472 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,526 You know, I was thinking 473 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,526 About getting marny 474 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:40,927 That exact same purse. 475 00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,730 Uh, you mind if I try it on? 476 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:46,700 - you want to wear it? 477 00:12:46,733 --> 00:12:48,501 - I do. 478 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,639 Oh, yeah. Hold that for me, 479 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,639 Just by the stem-- 480 00:12:52,672 --> 00:12:55,875 Right there. 481 00:12:52,672 --> 00:12:55,875 There you go. There you go. 482 00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:57,944 Oh. Yeah. 483 00:12:57,977 --> 00:13:00,460 It feels kind of good. 484 00:12:57,977 --> 00:13:00,460 You know, let me swing. 485 00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:01,514 All right. 486 00:13:01,548 --> 00:13:03,583 All right. 487 00:13:01,548 --> 00:13:03,583 Ah! 488 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,691 Ah, it's cute, but I think 489 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,691 I'm just gonna get her 490 00:13:11,725 --> 00:13:14,928 A ten-pack of t-shirts. 491 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:17,597 - okay, how is this 492 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:17,597 For a text to kareem? 493 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:22,635 "Kareem, I am so sorry for my 494 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:22,635 Erratic and difficult behavior. 495 00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:25,972 "I have been awful. 496 00:13:22,669 --> 00:13:25,972 Please come get me right now. 497 00:13:26,720 --> 00:13:28,808 "I have also been awful 498 00:13:26,720 --> 00:13:28,808 To nick thayer. 499 00:13:28,842 --> 00:13:32,645 Please use your connections 500 00:13:28,842 --> 00:13:32,645 To get him courtside seats." 501 00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:34,800 [phone rings] 502 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,616 Oh, my god. Her phone's ringing. 503 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,616 - make it stop! 504 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,451 - no, no, no, it's chris. 505 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,451 It's chris. 506 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:41,321 Hey, chris, 507 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:41,321 I still have sheila's phone. 508 00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:43,456 - why do you have my phone? 509 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:48,962 - uh... 510 00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,364 - we're trying to get you 511 00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,364 To leave the party. 512 00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:53,967 Chris doesn't want you here. 513 00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:53,967 - the truth-- 514 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,971 I would never have gone 515 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,971 With that. 516 00:13:58,400 --> 00:13:59,706 - what? 517 00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:01,941 Chris doesn't want me 518 00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:01,941 At our son's birthday? 519 00:14:02,420 --> 00:14:04,411 - well, having you here 520 00:14:02,420 --> 00:14:04,411 Is not easy for him. 521 00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,779 - I didn't realize that. 522 00:14:05,812 --> 00:14:10,116 Um, so he's having a tough time 523 00:14:05,812 --> 00:14:10,116 Seeing me. 524 00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:13,820 - yeah, he's having 525 00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:13,820 A really tough time. 526 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,822 - I get it. 527 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:18,825 He's lonely. 528 00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:22,620 - yeah! Why not? Sure. 529 00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:22,620 - yeah, sure. Yeah. 530 00:14:22,620 --> 00:14:23,697 - well, I understand. 531 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:27,133 Dating just isn't working out 532 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:27,133 For either of us. 533 00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:29,690 He misses me. 534 00:14:29,690 --> 00:14:30,870 - yeah, I wouldn't exactly-- 535 00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:33,730 - if that's the case, 536 00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:33,730 I will leave after cake. 537 00:14:33,730 --> 00:14:34,641 - that is definitely the case. 538 00:14:33,730 --> 00:14:34,641 - that's exactly the case. 539 00:14:34,674 --> 00:14:36,142 That's it. 540 00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:41,147 All: 541 00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:41,147 * happy birthday to you * 542 00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:44,384 [cheers and applause] 543 00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:52,158 - so nick and emily told me 544 00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:52,158 How you were feeling. 545 00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:55,662 I'm sorry if me being here 546 00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:55,662 Is difficult for you. 547 00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:57,970 - thank you. 548 00:14:57,970 --> 00:14:58,865 That's--that's really 549 00:14:57,970 --> 00:14:58,865 Understanding. 550 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:02,435 - picture. 551 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:02,435 - oh. [chuckles] 552 00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,700 - you could've just told me 553 00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,700 How you feel. 554 00:15:04,104 --> 00:15:05,739 - really? 555 00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,741 'cause I-I-I didn't know 556 00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,741 How you'd react. 557 00:15:07,774 --> 00:15:09,809 I mean-- 558 00:15:07,774 --> 00:15:09,809 - okay, get closer. 559 00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:14,547 - here's how I'd react. 560 00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:18,918 - no, no, no, no, no, no, no, 561 00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:18,918 No, no, no, no! 562 00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:27,527 - lick his face. 563 00:15:32,332 --> 00:15:34,670 - why the hell did you do that? 564 00:15:32,332 --> 00:15:34,670 - why did you do that? 565 00:15:34,670 --> 00:15:35,368 Why did you kiss me? 566 00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:37,303 - 'cause you miss us 567 00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:37,303 Being together. 568 00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:39,272 - what could possibly make you 569 00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:39,272 Think that? 570 00:15:39,305 --> 00:15:42,208 - nick told me. 571 00:15:42,242 --> 00:15:45,979 - who wants ice cream? 572 00:15:47,514 --> 00:15:50,917 - sheila, I understand 573 00:15:47,514 --> 00:15:50,917 You must be confused 574 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,218 Coming off your breakup 575 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,218 With kareem. 576 00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:55,221 - no! No. 577 00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:55,221 No, no, no, no, no. No. 578 00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:57,691 That kiss was just a joke. 579 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,926 That was-- 580 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,926 That was a joke kiss. 581 00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:01,928 Ha ha! 582 00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:01,928 [laughing] You know? 583 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:03,229 I got you. 584 00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:06,320 So I'm gonna go. 585 00:16:10,203 --> 00:16:13,206 And just to be clear, chris, 586 00:16:13,239 --> 00:16:16,409 You don't want my cake? 587 00:16:16,443 --> 00:16:18,244 - no, thanks. 588 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:21,381 - okay. Great. 589 00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:30,523 - my grandmother's 590 00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:30,523 Cake plate. 591 00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:36,696 - jeez. 592 00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:36,696 What's her problem? 593 00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:42,969 - [sniffles] 594 00:16:43,690 --> 00:16:44,504 - what are you doing in here? 595 00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:45,939 - [exhales deeply] 596 00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:47,607 My purse 597 00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:47,607 Is in chris' apartment, 598 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:51,611 And I don't really feel like 599 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:51,611 Going back in there. 600 00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:54,180 - all right, well, cool. 601 00:16:56,983 --> 00:16:59,652 - [cries] 602 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:02,555 - oh, I have to be nice to it. 603 00:17:04,156 --> 00:17:06,593 - [cries] 604 00:17:04,156 --> 00:17:06,593 - do you want a napkin? 605 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:09,295 'cause I, uh, have-- 606 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:09,295 I wrote an idea on this 607 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,310 For a movie starring tom hanks, 608 00:17:11,310 --> 00:17:14,534 But it's, 609 00:17:11,310 --> 00:17:14,534 Uh, not very good, so... 610 00:17:14,567 --> 00:17:16,236 - yeah. Thanks. 611 00:17:16,269 --> 00:17:20,400 You know, 612 00:17:16,269 --> 00:17:20,400 I'm a very composed person, 613 00:17:20,730 --> 00:17:22,375 But my boyfriend dumps me, 614 00:17:20,730 --> 00:17:22,375 And I go crazy, 615 00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,440 And I kiss my ex-husband, 616 00:17:24,770 --> 00:17:26,378 And I think, "Oh, maybe 617 00:17:24,770 --> 00:17:26,378 We'll get back together." 618 00:17:26,413 --> 00:17:28,415 I'm--I'm all over the place. 619 00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:30,583 I'm a mess. 620 00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:33,319 - well, you're in the right room 621 00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:33,319 For it, so... 622 00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:38,580 - but you know what I really 623 00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:38,580 Think I'm upset about? 624 00:17:38,580 --> 00:17:41,194 It's my child's 625 00:17:38,580 --> 00:17:41,194 First birthday. 626 00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:43,630 It's a big deal. 627 00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,650 It's a time for parents 628 00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,650 To look at each other 629 00:17:45,650 --> 00:17:48,168 And say, you know, 630 00:17:45,650 --> 00:17:48,168 "We made it." 631 00:17:48,201 --> 00:17:50,700 But chris and I didn't. 632 00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:51,471 We failed. 633 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,173 I failed. 634 00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:56,276 I don't fail. 635 00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:56,276 [exhales sharply] 636 00:17:56,309 --> 00:17:58,678 - you know, you may have failed 637 00:17:56,309 --> 00:17:58,678 As a wife 638 00:17:58,712 --> 00:18:02,682 And, you know, in general 639 00:17:58,712 --> 00:18:02,682 As a human being, 640 00:18:02,716 --> 00:18:06,353 But--but I have seen you 641 00:18:02,716 --> 00:18:06,353 With ernie, 642 00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,688 And you have not failed 643 00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,688 As a mother. 644 00:18:08,722 --> 00:18:11,691 At the end of the day, 645 00:18:08,722 --> 00:18:11,691 You are a loving, caring mom, 646 00:18:11,725 --> 00:18:15,362 And ernie is a great kid 647 00:18:11,725 --> 00:18:15,362 Because of that. 648 00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:17,630 - thanks, nick. 649 00:18:17,970 --> 00:18:18,431 - yep. 650 00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:24,237 - hey. I thought 651 00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:24,237 I heard you in here. 652 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,339 Hey, nick. 653 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,339 - hi, kareem. 654 00:18:27,741 --> 00:18:30,844 - what are you doing here? 655 00:18:27,741 --> 00:18:30,844 - I got your text. 656 00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:38,551 - I also changed your ringtone 657 00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:38,551 to mmmbop. 658 00:18:38,585 --> 00:18:43,890 - sheila, if you're serious 659 00:18:38,585 --> 00:18:43,890 About being sorry, then so am I. 660 00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:45,425 - oh. 661 00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:52,499 - not today, kareem! 662 00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:57,337 - well, I can tell 663 00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:57,337 You had fun, ernie. 664 00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:59,572 I can tell by the amount 665 00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:59,572 Of cake in your nose. 666 00:18:59,606 --> 00:19:01,241 Come here. 667 00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:03,309 Sorry, buddy. 668 00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:03,309 [knock at door] 669 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:06,846 - hey, I just need 670 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:06,846 To get my purse. 671 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,683 Don't worry. 672 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,683 I'm not gonna kiss you. 673 00:19:09,716 --> 00:19:11,584 - it's okay. 674 00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:15,455 - oh, look at him. 675 00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:15,455 There's more cake than baby. 676 00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:18,124 - [chuckles] 677 00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:19,759 - hey, chris. 678 00:19:19,793 --> 00:19:21,661 Look, if you don't want to come 679 00:19:19,793 --> 00:19:21,661 To my party for ernie, 680 00:19:21,695 --> 00:19:23,129 I understand. 681 00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:25,632 - no, no, of course 682 00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:25,632 I'm coming. 683 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:29,135 The thing is, there shouldn't be 684 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:29,135 A "Your party" and a "My party." 685 00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:30,770 He's gonna be our kid forever. 686 00:19:30,804 --> 00:19:32,138 I mean, are we gonna have 687 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:35,575 Separate graduations 688 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:35,575 And weddings? 689 00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:37,777 Even though we're not together, 690 00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:37,777 We're still a family. 691 00:19:37,811 --> 00:19:39,446 - yeah. No, you're right. 692 00:19:37,811 --> 00:19:39,446 I'm sorry. 693 00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:41,781 I should've included you. 694 00:19:41,815 --> 00:19:42,882 Okay. 695 00:19:42,916 --> 00:19:45,785 Um, I'm sorry for that too. 696 00:19:45,819 --> 00:19:48,321 - it's okay. It's not a party 697 00:19:45,819 --> 00:19:48,321 Till you break something 698 00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:52,359 That belonged 699 00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:52,359 To my grandmother. 700 00:19:52,392 --> 00:19:53,860 - hey, chris. 701 00:19:53,893 --> 00:19:55,595 Sheila, we got to go. 702 00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:58,164 I just came up with a great idea 703 00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:58,164 For a tom hanks movie. 704 00:20:03,336 --> 00:20:05,572 - bye, kareem. 705 00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:07,374 Grab it. Grab it. 706 00:20:07,407 --> 00:20:10,610 [growling] 707 00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:14,881 [grunts] 708 00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:20,820 - when did that get here? 709 00:20:20,854 --> 00:20:22,655 - chris dropped off 710 00:20:20,854 --> 00:20:22,655 Half the wall cake 711 00:20:22,689 --> 00:20:25,250 To feed the boys. 712 00:20:25,580 --> 00:20:26,826 - ooh, I'd love 713 00:20:25,580 --> 00:20:26,826 Some wall cake. 714 00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:28,194 - no, no, no, baby. 715 00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:28,194 No--baby, baby. 716 00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:31,197 Baby--baby, it's 33 minutes 717 00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:31,197 To shake time. 718 00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:33,199 You don't want to ruin 719 00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:33,199 Your shake. 720 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:36,202 - gary, this has to stop. 721 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:38,371 I was just putting chap stick 722 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:38,371 On my lips 723 00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:41,908 And ate the whole damn thing! 724 00:20:41,941 --> 00:20:44,444 - you're right. 725 00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:47,380 Who are we starving 726 00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:47,380 Ourselves for, huh? 727 00:20:47,414 --> 00:20:48,882 So what, we don't have 728 00:20:47,414 --> 00:20:48,882 The same energy 729 00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,784 As those people 730 00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,784 In that wedding photo? 731 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:53,119 Who the hell are they 732 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:53,119 To judge us? 733 00:20:53,153 --> 00:20:55,550 - yes! 734 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:56,990 Those jerks don't have 735 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:56,990 Four kids! 736 00:20:57,230 --> 00:20:58,240 - no! 737 00:20:58,580 --> 00:20:59,659 You know what, baby? 738 00:20:59,693 --> 00:21:02,228 You are just as fun 739 00:20:59,693 --> 00:21:02,228 And beautiful as you were 740 00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:05,432 The day I married you. 741 00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:08,134 - that was a good day. 742 00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:08,134 - mm-hmm. 743 00:21:08,168 --> 00:21:13,406 - I seem to remember 744 00:21:08,168 --> 00:21:13,406 You feeding me cake... 745 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,942 That day. 746 00:21:15,975 --> 00:21:20,180 - I seem to remember 747 00:21:15,975 --> 00:21:20,180 you feeding mecake... 748 00:21:20,213 --> 00:21:21,247 That day. 749 00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:25,251 [both chuckle] 750 00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:29,756 [both moaning] 751 00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,191 - okay. 752 00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,191 - hmm? 753 00:21:31,224 --> 00:21:33,460 - you're biting my finger. 754 00:21:31,224 --> 00:21:33,460 - mm, baby. 44205

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