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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:35,559 --> 00:00:41,219 THE VIRGIN WIFE 2 00:01:05,620 --> 00:01:09,044 He fell... 3 00:01:22,686 --> 00:01:24,530 It's the first time I've seen an Italian. 4 00:01:24,620 --> 00:01:25,582 And you? 5 00:01:25,634 --> 00:01:27,618 I want to go to bed with him. 6 00:01:27,650 --> 00:01:33,140 Of course it's well known. Italians are the best in the world. 7 00:01:33,278 --> 00:01:36,033 Yes, a true Latin lover, but I think he's with his wife. 8 00:01:36,150 --> 00:01:36,964 So what? I still want to do it. 9 00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:40,343 - What nerve! - Why are you so angry? 10 00:01:40,386 --> 00:01:43,408 Those French girls. Talking about you! 11 00:01:43,445 --> 00:01:45,929 - Oh, and...? - How can they know? 12 00:01:45,967 --> 00:01:49,476 They don't know what you lack as a the Latin lover. 13 00:01:49,556 --> 00:01:53,864 What do you mean, Valentina? I'll pretend I didn't hear that. 14 00:01:54,024 --> 00:01:57,084 Easy for you to say! You've yet to show me your skills. 15 00:02:36,041 --> 00:02:39,718 Over here, Valentina! 16 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,706 - Hi, Mama! - Hi... 17 00:02:45,757 --> 00:02:50,447 You look exhausted, darling! The honeymoon must have been something ... 18 00:02:51,359 --> 00:02:55,120 - Yes, I'm tired... from the trip and all... - You can tell me, I'm your mother. 19 00:02:55,165 --> 00:02:58,110 Come here and give me a kiss. 20 00:02:58,869 --> 00:03:03,041 - What's this? It looks like you're wasting away. - Honestly, I never felt better. 21 00:03:03,048 --> 00:03:06,246 My daughter has worn you out... 22 00:03:06,261 --> 00:03:09,103 - I, uh... - Let's go! 23 00:03:09,585 --> 00:03:13,553 It was non-stop, mama. Go here, go there, come on... 24 00:03:13,578 --> 00:03:18,750 - All over Italy... ! - Bravo Giovannino... my daughter is safely home! 25 00:03:18,785 --> 00:03:22,883 Why didn't Uncle Frederico come to pick us up, mama? 26 00:03:22,891 --> 00:03:27,867 He's over at the factory, looking after his customers. He works all the time. 27 00:03:28,689 --> 00:03:32,440 Come on Matilda, roll over and I'll give it to you again! 28 00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:35,879 - Damn it to hell ... - Why are you swearing? 29 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:39,826 - No... the children are back! It's already 4 o'clock. - What children are you talking about? 30 00:03:39,869 --> 00:03:43,781 Who? My nephew Giovannino and his Valentina are back from their honeymoon. 31 00:03:44,415 --> 00:03:49,163 I promised I'd pick them up at the pier. The boat arrived at 3 o'clock. 32 00:03:49,975 --> 00:03:52,381 - Ciao, baby. You were great. - Ciao ! 33 00:04:06,142 --> 00:04:11,794 Home at last. This fresh air is so invigorating! 34 00:04:11,883 --> 00:04:15,439 - How lovely! - It's Murano, do you like it? 35 00:04:15,466 --> 00:04:20,922 Well, this fresh air here will sure be good... for my lungs. 36 00:04:20,948 --> 00:04:24,242 Sure, good for your lungs... 37 00:04:24,825 --> 00:04:30,095 Rome and Naples may be beautiful, but there's nothing like our lake. 38 00:04:30,683 --> 00:04:34,621 Like they say, every bird prefers its own nest. 39 00:04:35,009 --> 00:04:40,126 Look here... Mama Lucia bought you new bedding. 40 00:04:40,209 --> 00:04:44,633 - Have you see this, Valentina? - Yes, the blanket is perfect. Thanks, Mama! 41 00:04:45,775 --> 00:04:48,743 You're a wonderful mother! 42 00:04:49,444 --> 00:04:53,190 - Look! My mother's picture. - Oh, yes? 43 00:04:54,056 --> 00:04:58,723 It was Mr. Frederico's idea. Look at the beautiful frame; it's silver. 44 00:05:01,745 --> 00:05:05,837 Where are the wanderers? My treasures... 45 00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:09,445 - Hello, Uncle! - Valentina... 46 00:05:09,999 --> 00:05:13,484 Giovannino! Mrs. Lucia... ! 47 00:05:13,733 --> 00:05:17,183 Mama Lucia told us that you've been working like a madman. 48 00:05:17,248 --> 00:05:20,574 What can I say? The work has to get done. You're the one who's had an exciting time. 49 00:05:20,631 --> 00:05:23,111 - So tell me.. was everything perfect? - Pretty much... 50 00:05:23,112 --> 00:05:26,047 - It was so so, Uncle. - What happened? 51 00:05:26,454 --> 00:05:31,098 Hey... you seem a little depressed... 52 00:05:31,226 --> 00:05:36,826 No, they're just tired, Frederico. Up, down... You get the idea? 53 00:05:36,829 --> 00:05:41,839 I understand! On top, that's the best... 54 00:05:41,867 --> 00:05:45,517 So everything is okay. Gabriela, bring us a bottle of that 60 year-old brandy. 55 00:05:45,553 --> 00:05:48,635 - As you wish... - Why brandy... ? 56 00:05:48,658 --> 00:05:51,253 That's so old-fashioned, Uncle. 57 00:05:51,633 --> 00:05:54,959 Today everyone uses drugs, and you still believe in this stuff? 58 00:05:55,441 --> 00:06:00,659 Listen to your Uncle! Drink a glass of brandy and you'll see what it does... 59 00:06:00,724 --> 00:06:05,785 Are you sure? 60 00:06:16,893 --> 00:06:19,995 - What a beautiful gown... ! - It's not too transparent? 61 00:06:20,958 --> 00:06:24,199 I can see everything... 62 00:06:26,890 --> 00:06:31,304 - It's beautiful. Where did you get it? - It's a gift from mama. 63 00:06:32,064 --> 00:06:36,146 She made it with her own hands. From all natural materials. 64 00:06:36,859 --> 00:06:40,092 See how silky it feels! 65 00:06:40,164 --> 00:06:44,437 Yes, it is silky and slippery... 66 00:06:46,033 --> 00:06:51,987 It slides through my fingers. It's wonderful. Your mother made this? 67 00:06:52,085 --> 00:06:57,996 Yes, both the inside and outside. Why are you waiting to take what's inside? 68 00:06:59,413 --> 00:07:04,905 - Reach inside and take them both. - Yes... 69 00:07:04,923 --> 00:07:10,654 - I want you, Valentina! - Then turn out the light and take me. 70 00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:15,792 - Why do you care about the light? - Just turn off the lights, Giovannino! 71 00:07:18,070 --> 00:07:20,478 Damn... 72 00:07:20,793 --> 00:07:23,959 - My love... - The other one... 73 00:07:23,994 --> 00:07:27,763 What's with the lights? You'll make me lose my mind. 74 00:07:28,352 --> 00:07:31,371 Please turn it out! 75 00:07:31,383 --> 00:07:34,886 Yes! Damn... 76 00:07:35,091 --> 00:07:41,186 - My love... - It seems like the nightgown excites you... 77 00:07:41,214 --> 00:07:45,099 You certainly know me, Valentina. Playing games in bed is so exciting. 78 00:07:45,129 --> 00:07:47,848 - Then take a shot at the goal, baby! - I'm getting into position ... 79 00:07:47,921 --> 00:07:53,153 - Come on, score... - Tonight I will be victorious! 80 00:07:53,245 --> 00:07:56,580 - Okay, Giovanni! Give it to her! - Remove my nightgown! 81 00:07:56,784 --> 00:08:00,114 Not now, it will spoil the moment. Apparently it helps me. 82 00:08:00,114 --> 00:08:04,198 - Then I'll take it off ... - No ... 83 00:08:06,372 --> 00:08:11,639 You're like the Eiffel Tower... Faster, Giovanni... 84 00:08:11,780 --> 00:08:17,014 It's so good, Giovanni... Don't stop now... 85 00:08:20,023 --> 00:08:24,872 Giovanni... 86 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:29,338 Giovanni !? 87 00:08:29,338 --> 00:08:32,140 - I'll be damned... - Not again? 88 00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:37,674 Damn it too hell! It's not possible... I just can't understand it. 89 00:08:45,841 --> 00:08:50,768 - It doesn't matter. I enjoyed it. - What shall we do, Valentina? 90 00:08:51,505 --> 00:08:55,281 I think it's the position that's the most important. 91 00:08:56,072 --> 00:08:59,090 How do you know that? 92 00:08:59,183 --> 00:09:04,043 I've seen articles in magazines and newspapers... 93 00:09:06,752 --> 00:09:09,815 - What are you doing, removing your nightgown? - Yes. 94 00:09:10,407 --> 00:09:14,072 No... just pull it up... 95 00:09:21,111 --> 00:09:25,252 I fell out of bed. Here, let me pick you up. 96 00:09:26,157 --> 00:09:30,841 Let's see how this works... 97 00:09:35,671 --> 00:09:39,734 - That didn't go very well... - Are you uncomfortable? 98 00:09:41,191 --> 00:09:44,288 - Ow! - Did I hurt you? 99 00:10:19,722 --> 00:10:23,032 What's that? 100 00:10:24,639 --> 00:10:27,516 A shoe. 101 00:10:28,537 --> 00:10:31,749 Do you think we should try another position? 102 00:10:31,771 --> 00:10:34,851 If it was up to me, we might as well try it upside down in the window. 103 00:10:34,852 --> 00:10:39,496 It's not a problem of position, I need some kind of miracle, I tell you ... 104 00:10:40,664 --> 00:10:45,554 - So you can't even do it in our own home? - I'm sorry, Valentina! 105 00:10:45,906 --> 00:10:50,336 I think it was a mistake to try. Maybe I'm just tired from our trip. 106 00:10:52,013 --> 00:10:56,652 You'll see, after a good night's sleep, things will be better tomorrow. 107 00:11:00,636 --> 00:11:05,174 - I have to go... take care of this. - As you wish, my lady. 108 00:11:07,616 --> 00:11:14,304 Listen, Valentina, before you deal with this situation, I want to be sure. 109 00:11:14,454 --> 00:11:16,008 Stop it, mama! 110 00:11:16,017 --> 00:11:21,265 You've done everything for Giovannino? Everything I told you... from A to Z? 111 00:11:22,051 --> 00:11:27,438 Everything, mama. Everything! I've done everything possible, as well as the impossible. 112 00:11:28,382 --> 00:11:33,426 By the Virgin, look what can happen to a person. 113 00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:38,180 What a fool! He does nothing? He doesn't say a word? 114 00:11:38,157 --> 00:11:40,347 He says good night! 115 00:11:40,381 --> 00:11:45,310 This won't be easy. I'm going to talk to his uncle, Frederico. 116 00:11:45,340 --> 00:11:49,227 No, Mama! What does it have to do with Uncle Frederico? I'm too ashamed! 117 00:11:49,289 --> 00:11:52,337 Are you crazy? It's he who should be ashamed! 118 00:11:52,551 --> 00:11:55,303 He may have money, but he's still a common slob. 119 00:11:55,838 --> 00:11:58,310 I'll organize them later. 120 00:11:59,262 --> 00:12:02,235 I may be overly sensitive, but I get a bit nervous when I see the bottom. 121 00:12:02,257 --> 00:12:05,470 Don't worry, Mr. Frederico, I won't leave you to stack all these boxes. 122 00:12:05,505 --> 00:12:08,830 What boxes? Come on down, Camilla! Give me your hand! Come! 123 00:12:08,980 --> 00:12:12,150 I'll pay you overtime... 124 00:12:12,213 --> 00:12:15,843 Actually, I'll buy you a whole wardrobe... 125 00:12:15,906 --> 00:12:20,882 - I'm afraid, Mr. Frederico. I'm too young. - I can wait! How about another five minutes? 126 00:12:22,885 --> 00:12:27,334 - Hey! You have nothing on underneath. - Of course! Can't you see that I'm hot!? 127 00:12:27,850 --> 00:12:31,165 You're telling me! I feel like I'm on fire. Like the Olympic flame ... 128 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,762 What are you doing with your hands, Mr. Frederico ... ! 129 00:12:42,663 --> 00:12:43,963 My God... 130 00:12:44,045 --> 00:12:46,943 - Is it your father? - No, Mr. Frederico. It's Mrs. Lucia. 131 00:12:47,091 --> 00:12:49,041 - Mr. Frederico! - That bitch... 132 00:12:50,816 --> 00:12:53,388 - Frederico... I'm a bit angry! - Well, that's that... 133 00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:56,896 What are you doing naked? Cover yourself up! 134 00:12:58,303 --> 00:13:00,061 What is it, Mrs. Lucia? 135 00:13:00,093 --> 00:13:04,045 A pair of snakes has nothing on your nephew. Did you knew that Valentina is still intact? 136 00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,247 You know why? Because Giovannino is impotent. 137 00:13:08,115 --> 00:13:12,990 Gabriela! I want the truth. 138 00:13:13,054 --> 00:13:17,972 What did Giovannino do when he came into your room before he got married? 139 00:13:18,547 --> 00:13:23,359 - What do you think? He did what he wanted to... - Yes, but did he do it normally? 140 00:13:23,397 --> 00:13:25,117 What do you mean by normally? 141 00:13:25,118 --> 00:13:28,018 Normally? He pushed it in, pulled it out. Was his pistol hard? 142 00:13:28,043 --> 00:13:30,060 Hard in the sense of being violent? 143 00:13:30,125 --> 00:13:33,064 No. I mean, was his pistol... ? 144 00:13:33,281 --> 00:13:37,088 Yes, it was normal. But nothing like yours, Mr. Frederico. 145 00:13:37,089 --> 00:13:41,040 You can't compare anyone to me. I am a special case, suffice it to say... 146 00:13:43,484 --> 00:13:46,540 What could have happened? He was properly trained as a child. 147 00:13:46,541 --> 00:13:50,541 He excelled at all sports. So why is he like this now? 148 00:13:51,049 --> 00:13:53,065 Why, what has happened? 149 00:13:53,285 --> 00:13:57,181 What has happened is that he has yet to use his pistol on his wife. 150 00:13:57,682 --> 00:14:00,980 What a pity! And now? 151 00:14:01,037 --> 00:14:05,668 Instead of sitting on the sidelines, you must get involved, since this is your domain. 152 00:14:05,711 --> 00:14:08,742 - What can I do? - You need to help him raise his flag. 153 00:14:08,827 --> 00:14:11,551 He must have the strength to get his jet off the runway. 154 00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:14,703 And if Ms. Valentina finds out, what do I say? 155 00:14:14,775 --> 00:14:18,043 That's a problem, what to tell Ms. Valentina... 156 00:14:18,226 --> 00:14:23,547 But what can we do, cry in our milk? Giovannino must have a crotch pistol instead of chewing gum! 157 00:14:24,463 --> 00:14:29,965 Valentina should hold her tongue, until you've helped Giovannino overcome his problem. 158 00:14:30,939 --> 00:14:39,693 Tonight, when Mrs. Valentina is taking her bath, you'll be taking Giovannino. 159 00:14:39,740 --> 00:14:43,011 Now, let me take a moment to do an inventory... 160 00:14:43,571 --> 00:14:49,050 When you see the takeoff angle has reached 100 degrees, he's ready to fly. 161 00:14:50,322 --> 00:14:56,832 And before dinner, be sure to spice up the soup with pepper from Calabria. 162 00:14:56,892 --> 00:14:59,687 Pepper, not soft butter... 163 00:15:00,607 --> 00:15:05,591 Gabriela, you forgot to add some soup to the pepper... 164 00:15:05,658 --> 00:15:07,679 Why, is it too hot? 165 00:15:08,130 --> 00:15:12,017 No, it's just like "The Towering Inferno" with Paul Newman. 166 00:15:12,098 --> 00:15:16,240 I'm sorry sir, it's a new kind of pepper, and I didn't know how to use it... 167 00:15:16,352 --> 00:15:19,370 ...and Mr. Frederico likes things spicy. 168 00:15:19,522 --> 00:15:23,835 That was more like a flamethrower than pepper. 169 00:15:31,223 --> 00:15:35,408 I hate this program. I'm going to bed to read "Lady Chatterley". 170 00:15:38,125 --> 00:15:41,810 - I'll be up as soon as I finish this cigarette. - That's good, Giovannino! 171 00:15:42,779 --> 00:15:46,834 - Good night, Uncle Frederico! - Good night, Valentina! 172 00:15:51,603 --> 00:15:55,468 I don't really like this program either. I think I'll go out for a walk. 173 00:15:55,790 --> 00:15:58,711 - Good night, Giovannino! - Good night, Uncle! 174 00:15:58,787 --> 00:16:03,322 - Good night, Mr. Frederico! - Good night, Gabriela! 175 00:16:22,423 --> 00:16:27,747 Excuse me! 176 00:16:30,687 --> 00:16:34,244 The attacking forces begin their offensive from the sky. 177 00:16:34,538 --> 00:16:37,997 Throwing a wall of steel ahead of the advance. 178 00:16:38,116 --> 00:16:42,818 The first blows fall in the surrounding area. The enemy senses danger... 179 00:16:42,871 --> 00:16:47,071 ...while below the means of defense begin to weaken under the blows. 180 00:16:47,108 --> 00:16:52,273 The enemy futiley tries to repulse the attack that is battering it, and hold its lines. 181 00:16:55,720 --> 00:17:00,641 The artillery opens a violent bombardment. The defending forces seem to give up. 182 00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:07,537 There is a predetermined strategy. Covered by air support, the infantry advances in safely. 183 00:17:07,690 --> 00:17:11,294 First infiltrating and then advancing. 184 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:19,409 While the enemy seems distracted, predetermined targets are subjected to attack. 185 00:17:19,645 --> 00:17:23,433 The infiltration continues its steady advance and is unstoppable. 186 00:17:24,154 --> 00:17:27,206 The enemy remains under cover and tries to resist from his defensive position... 187 00:17:27,300 --> 00:17:32,216 ...hoping to attempt a counter-offensive. 188 00:17:36,816 --> 00:17:42,411 Finally, the infantry leaves its defensive position and mounts an attack... 189 00:17:42,498 --> 00:17:45,912 What are you doing, Mr. Giovannino? Why are you touching me? What are you thinking? 190 00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:51,380 - I'll tear your panties off... - Yes, Mr. Giovannino, just like old times... 191 00:17:51,447 --> 00:17:55,491 You're so rough... What if your wife comes... 192 00:17:55,509 --> 00:17:59,141 Come here... The bells have started to ring... 193 00:17:59,164 --> 00:18:02,290 Stop it! 194 00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:05,299 - Gabriela! - Mr. Frederico! 195 00:18:05,331 --> 00:18:08,622 Damn, that wasn't pepper. That was a napalm bomb. 196 00:18:08,651 --> 00:18:11,717 It feels like a fire in my stomach. Bring me a lemonade, Gabriela. 197 00:18:11,787 --> 00:18:14,871 Immediately, Mr. Frederico. 198 00:18:14,967 --> 00:18:18,010 I'll be off to bed, Uncle. Good night! 199 00:18:18,022 --> 00:18:22,608 Bravo! That's a good idea. Go quickly... you'd better hurry. 200 00:18:22,651 --> 00:18:27,587 Valentina! Where are you? 201 00:18:27,587 --> 00:18:30,989 - I'm in the bathroom, just a moment! - Open the door! 202 00:18:31,021 --> 00:18:35,200 Holy Ambrosia, you've lent a hand! With respect, I give thanks for that! 203 00:18:35,366 --> 00:18:40,249 Please come out Valentina, I'm in the mood... Open up! 204 00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:43,561 You only feel like it when I'm in the bathroom? 205 00:18:43,596 --> 00:18:46,726 I've never tried that, but I swear to you that I am ready! 206 00:18:46,768 --> 00:18:49,077 You're a liar, I don't believe it. 207 00:18:49,849 --> 00:18:54,158 No! Please don't talk like that! 208 00:18:54,222 --> 00:18:58,249 Valentina, something's happening down there... 209 00:18:58,306 --> 00:19:01,469 - What is it? - If I fail, you can shoot me. 210 00:19:01,507 --> 00:19:04,365 Let's hurry! 211 00:19:04,421 --> 00:19:08,960 - Come see what you've done to me... - This is dangerous, you should be in bed. 212 00:19:09,043 --> 00:19:12,097 Beds are for the sick. I'm as healthy as a horse... 213 00:19:12,677 --> 00:19:15,683 ...in a house where people spend half their day having sex. 214 00:19:15,727 --> 00:19:19,127 Come here! Let me make a deposit in your bank... 215 00:19:20,653 --> 00:19:25,045 - Did you pull a muscle? - No... a fork has pierced my snake. 216 00:19:33,104 --> 00:19:37,094 - You're acting so rough... - Valentina! I ... 217 00:19:38,149 --> 00:19:42,111 - It feels like the end of the world! - But I feel better... 218 00:19:42,865 --> 00:19:49,805 How beautiful! Once the gates were opened, they unleashed the storm... 219 00:19:51,039 --> 00:19:55,092 I felt like a human flamethrower, but now... 220 00:19:55,106 --> 00:19:59,380 - But now the flame has gone out. - It's not my fault that you broke the bed. 221 00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:02,525 - I'm ready, and you sit in the bathroom ... - I'm always ready. 222 00:20:02,525 --> 00:20:05,893 Why don't you read "Lady Chatterley"? You might learn something. 223 00:20:05,921 --> 00:20:08,992 What does "Lady Chatterley" have to do with it? 224 00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:12,468 - Go see Mrs. Valentina. - Surely Mrs. Valentina wants some privacy? 225 00:20:13,490 --> 00:20:18,475 What do you know? Go make the bed. Tonight we had some bad luck ... 226 00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:27,571 Look what's happened to me... ! Sitting here with a wounded snake. 227 00:20:29,296 --> 00:20:32,268 We're going to lunch, Mrs. Valentina. Shall I close up since everyone is leaving? 228 00:20:32,269 --> 00:20:36,111 - No, Tania's husband comes for her. - Do you know when Mrs. Lucia is returning? 229 00:20:36,249 --> 00:20:40,443 - She went to Brescia to close a contract. - Then I'll say goodbye and bon appetite! 230 00:20:40,498 --> 00:20:42,957 - Thank you... - Let's go, girls. 231 00:20:44,231 --> 00:20:47,382 What an honor, Mrs. Valentina! 232 00:20:47,437 --> 00:20:51,976 - You can go to mass while you're out, girls. - Thank you, Mrs. Valentina! 233 00:20:52,615 --> 00:20:57,006 I understand your mother is out of town, Mrs. Valentina? 234 00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:01,131 Mother went to Brescia and will be gone the rest of the day. 235 00:21:01,138 --> 00:21:05,036 I didn't come to see your mother. It is you who warms my heart, Mrs. Valentina! 236 00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:08,129 Can I help you with something? 237 00:21:08,193 --> 00:21:12,661 You already have. But excuse my impudence, I continue to live in hope. 238 00:21:12,677 --> 00:21:15,519 - Please... Mr. Lawyer! - There's no cause for worry... 239 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:19,058 My veneration of you remains discrete and respectful. 240 00:21:19,702 --> 00:21:22,603 What do you want? 241 00:21:22,603 --> 00:21:27,094 I came to pick up some documents concerning my client's bankruptcy. 242 00:21:27,496 --> 00:21:31,791 They should be an envelope for me in your office. 243 00:21:40,027 --> 00:21:43,659 - Is this it? - What beautiful hair you have, Mrs. Valentina... 244 00:21:43,751 --> 00:21:46,807 - ... soft and sensual ... - Get out of here, Mr. Lawyer. 245 00:21:46,879 --> 00:21:50,988 - There's nothing wrong with this, Mrs. Valentina. - My name is Mrs. Arrighini. 246 00:21:51,005 --> 00:21:54,826 - There's nothing wrong with this, Mrs. Arrighini. - Take your hands off me! 247 00:21:55,869 --> 00:21:59,039 What are you doing with my clothes? 248 00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:04,043 - I've loved you all my life. - You make me sick. 249 00:22:04,757 --> 00:22:07,920 Don't struggle so... This is quite normal... 250 00:22:07,995 --> 00:22:11,143 Valentina! 251 00:22:11,239 --> 00:22:16,930 I'm in here Giovannino. I had to get some documents for Lawyer Caldura. 252 00:22:17,571 --> 00:22:20,593 Good afternoon, Mr. Arrighini. How is your uncle? 253 00:22:20,688 --> 00:22:24,388 My uncle is fine. May I ask how you are doing, Mr. Lawyer? 254 00:22:25,204 --> 00:22:28,227 Pretty well, thanks! 255 00:22:28,254 --> 00:22:34,893 I'll take these documents, and get the rest from your mother. 256 00:22:34,963 --> 00:22:39,443 - Good day... ! - Goodbye! 257 00:22:39,973 --> 00:22:43,142 If I see that slimey lawyer's face again, I'll break his nose. 258 00:22:43,641 --> 00:22:45,759 - Why, what did he do? - Nothing, but I'll still beat him. 259 00:22:45,769 --> 00:22:48,806 If only to have fun. 260 00:22:48,915 --> 00:22:52,170 The lawyer is a gentleman, he wouldn't do anything to hurt me, Giovannino. 261 00:22:52,235 --> 00:22:55,608 I'd like to see that toad with a girl of his own. 262 00:22:58,027 --> 00:23:02,997 Listen, Valentina! I've gone a little overboard about all this. 263 00:23:03,066 --> 00:23:08,116 I'm normally not like this. This isn't like me. 264 00:23:08,199 --> 00:23:12,279 Give me a moment! You see how I got... 265 00:23:12,558 --> 00:23:16,316 I became enflamed... 266 00:23:16,345 --> 00:23:23,091 Sometimes I react to you like someone who had a set of balls instead of a limp snake and... 267 00:23:23,685 --> 00:23:26,715 But I swear, that's how I feel and the rest be damned. 268 00:23:27,269 --> 00:23:29,697 I don't know. Maybe its some kind of complex, like Freud says. 269 00:23:30,300 --> 00:23:34,459 Or I might need a technician, or a doctor, or a plumber. 270 00:23:34,705 --> 00:23:39,684 - But I do love you... - You know that you love me. 271 00:23:42,578 --> 00:23:47,317 I know, baby. 272 00:23:47,669 --> 00:23:52,509 And I love you. I adore you! 273 00:23:52,991 --> 00:23:57,521 Don't let some buffoon ruin everything. 274 00:23:58,125 --> 00:24:04,053 Then I promise I'll succeed... Come here! 275 00:24:09,121 --> 00:24:12,381 I'll make you forget that lawyer. 276 00:24:12,399 --> 00:24:16,254 - What lawyer? I want you. - And I want you... 277 00:24:40,542 --> 00:24:45,018 But you promised, Giovannino... 278 00:24:46,292 --> 00:24:50,147 Giovannino! Darling! 279 00:24:50,377 --> 00:24:53,759 I blew it again. 280 00:24:53,835 --> 00:24:57,340 Why am I cursed? What kind of life is this? 281 00:24:57,421 --> 00:25:00,705 - This is affliction is destroying me! - Where you going, Giovannino? 282 00:25:00,944 --> 00:25:04,807 Where should I go? Onto the terrace, into the garden? I'm going to hell. 283 00:25:11,985 --> 00:25:16,522 The fact is I have no more cases today... 284 00:25:28,395 --> 00:25:31,661 It's so hot! Tell me, where can we cool off? 285 00:25:31,745 --> 00:25:34,917 Let's go to the bar. 286 00:25:34,925 --> 00:25:39,520 Look here... Hello! 287 00:25:39,922 --> 00:25:42,927 Mrs. Lucia, Mrs. Valentina! May we have the honor? 288 00:25:43,008 --> 00:25:48,265 - Thanks, but I'm thirsty! - Giovannino ... ! 289 00:25:50,244 --> 00:25:54,254 You two may do as you please... 290 00:25:54,828 --> 00:25:58,900 - Excuse us, Mr. Lawyer! - My pleasure, Mrs. Lucia! 291 00:26:07,644 --> 00:26:12,380 I heard a rumor that you were pursuing some young married woman. 292 00:26:12,422 --> 00:26:16,617 I can tell when you're being diplomatic. I would never do such a terrible thing. 293 00:26:16,676 --> 00:26:19,498 So what have you been doing? 294 00:26:19,498 --> 00:26:24,216 What I've done isn't important. What is important is what people think I've done. 295 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:30,210 I know the truth. Giovannino is the one to watch out for here in the village. 296 00:26:30,716 --> 00:26:32,894 Is that true? 297 00:26:32,950 --> 00:26:38,311 His nephew's wife, Valentina, is quite... Do you follow me, Lawyer Caldura? 298 00:26:38,477 --> 00:26:41,941 Look how he fathered all those bastards in southern towns. 299 00:26:42,514 --> 00:26:45,439 And I can tell you those rumors are no joke. 300 00:26:46,217 --> 00:26:53,614 If they are true, no one could blame Mrs. Valentina if tomorrow... 301 00:26:54,213 --> 00:26:59,797 ...or the day after tomorrow, would leave her husband to seek happiness... elsewhere. 302 00:27:28,541 --> 00:27:30,807 What's this... 303 00:28:37,325 --> 00:28:39,041 Bravo, Uncle! 304 00:28:40,288 --> 00:28:44,581 - In the morning she practices her gymnastics. - Yes, yes! 305 00:28:45,110 --> 00:28:48,995 It perks me up, too... 306 00:28:49,031 --> 00:28:52,116 I've got to be off to the factory. See you later. 307 00:28:52,203 --> 00:28:55,876 - Yes, Uncle. - Ciao! Be good. 308 00:29:16,225 --> 00:29:18,993 - Who is it? - Alain Delon! 309 00:29:19,050 --> 00:29:22,701 I prefer you, Frederico! To what do I owe the pleasure? 310 00:29:22,725 --> 00:29:27,715 - Is there something you want? - I'd like to give you a trim. 311 00:29:28,327 --> 00:29:30,697 - Look here! Property of Moulin Rouge. - What's that? 312 00:29:30,734 --> 00:29:33,122 - My Red Mill in Paris! - I understand. 313 00:29:33,827 --> 00:29:36,996 But it's ten in the morning and the Mill is closed. 314 00:29:37,019 --> 00:29:40,083 We need a non-stop program in heavy industry. 315 00:29:40,126 --> 00:29:44,206 I want to go into your oven... 316 00:29:44,727 --> 00:29:49,254 - You're in rare form this morning... - I can't even think. 317 00:29:49,267 --> 00:29:53,900 - That moron of a nephew Giovannino... - By the way, people are saying that he... 318 00:29:53,970 --> 00:29:57,816 I know what they say! His wife has aviation gas for blood. 319 00:29:57,820 --> 00:30:00,854 A woman who could set fire to the city of Brianza while the idiot stands... 320 00:30:00,868 --> 00:30:04,000 ...with his dick in his hand instead of... 321 00:30:04,076 --> 00:30:08,087 Perhaps I'm wrong, but you might do well to teach your little nephew some working skills... 322 00:30:08,114 --> 00:30:10,703 And the first would be learning to drill! 323 00:30:14,504 --> 00:30:19,711 Bull hormones are infallible. Your problem will be solved in less than 48 hours. 324 00:30:22,029 --> 00:30:26,061 - Unless... - Unless what? 325 00:30:28,039 --> 00:30:32,343 Unless it's something else. Sit down... 326 00:30:34,380 --> 00:30:37,026 - What illnesses did you have when you were little? - I don't remember. 327 00:30:37,125 --> 00:30:40,558 I'll check you record. So... 328 00:30:41,777 --> 00:30:47,703 At seven you had broken a leg. At 12 you fell from a tree. 329 00:30:47,805 --> 00:30:50,345 At 15 you got hit in the head with a stone... 330 00:30:50,372 --> 00:30:54,769 I know Doc, but you must admit, I was a bit lucky. 331 00:30:54,941 --> 00:30:59,572 You're right. It could have been worse. Let's take a look at your chest. 332 00:30:59,657 --> 00:31:05,049 Lie back! Usually, the problem is internal. 333 00:31:06,967 --> 00:31:10,488 Sit up! 334 00:31:14,917 --> 00:31:16,797 Take a breath. 335 00:31:18,098 --> 00:31:19,598 How does that feel? 336 00:31:19,613 --> 00:31:23,730 - I feel a sensation of heat. - Impossible! What heat? 337 00:31:24,198 --> 00:31:27,513 It's just what I feel, and it's getting stronger. 338 00:31:27,944 --> 00:31:32,040 Let me guess. You're no longer feeling it now? 339 00:31:32,466 --> 00:31:37,123 - You're right! I don't feel it. - You're healthy as a horse. 340 00:31:37,788 --> 00:31:41,063 That's how it is! Although being a horse may not be healthy for me. 341 00:31:41,321 --> 00:31:44,846 Give it time, we've just got started. 342 00:31:44,847 --> 00:31:47,652 - Giovannino Arrighini! - Present. 343 00:31:48,192 --> 00:31:52,029 Come over here! Tell me something! 344 00:31:54,371 --> 00:32:00,513 These pictures of muscle men... how do they effect you? 345 00:32:01,355 --> 00:32:05,113 - They disgust me, Doc. - You are saved! 346 00:32:05,296 --> 00:32:08,408 Come on Camilla, don't tease me. 347 00:32:08,859 --> 00:32:12,534 I helped your father, I helped this Christian democracy ... what are you afraid of? 348 00:32:12,611 --> 00:32:18,038 If the communists return they'll subvert the workers, Don Emilio says. 349 00:32:18,245 --> 00:32:21,693 What of the workers? I'm a friend of labor, I've trained them. 350 00:32:21,820 --> 00:32:24,830 - You are so fresh and beautiful... - Mr. Frederico! 351 00:32:24,889 --> 00:32:27,919 What is this, some kind of emergency? 352 00:32:28,201 --> 00:32:33,245 It's getting so you can't talk politics any more... 353 00:32:34,158 --> 00:32:37,297 - Where you are, Mr. Frederico? - In the shit. 354 00:32:37,372 --> 00:32:40,091 - Sorry! - So what's the crisis? 355 00:32:40,168 --> 00:32:42,536 It's a telegram from Mr. Gianfranco. 356 00:32:42,629 --> 00:32:47,315 That's nice. You made it sound like there was an earthquake. I'm coming. 357 00:32:49,107 --> 00:32:52,933 - What did he say? - He's coming this morning with his governess. 358 00:32:52,938 --> 00:32:57,924 - The Lady Cartofen... - Mrs. Valentina already opened it. 359 00:32:59,580 --> 00:33:04,652 Perfect! Prepare a royal lunch and the guest bedroom. 360 00:33:04,917 --> 00:33:09,060 - Of course. - Why not take Camilla to the house? 361 00:33:09,576 --> 00:33:12,226 There will be a lot of people and you'll need some help. 362 00:33:12,315 --> 00:33:16,031 I suspect the kind of work she's cut out for would help you more than me. 363 00:33:16,431 --> 00:33:18,708 I like to work... not to be worked over. 364 00:33:20,370 --> 00:33:24,965 Quickly, put that on the shelf. 365 00:33:25,346 --> 00:33:30,808 Brigitte, this is a Sicilian specialty. Sort of African-Italian. 366 00:33:31,446 --> 00:33:35,901 - This is a gift from the lawyer Caldura. - Thank you, Uncle Frederico! 367 00:33:36,827 --> 00:33:40,149 - Care for a bite? - No. 368 00:33:40,250 --> 00:33:44,437 - These sweet marzipan cakes are aphrodisiacs. - What are aphrodisiacs? 369 00:33:44,522 --> 00:33:50,382 Aphrodisiacs make you crave a good fleecing every week, then recover for two months. 370 00:33:51,287 --> 00:33:57,186 - Gianfranco eats plenty of these when he's here. - But I'm always a bit skeptical whether... 371 00:33:57,728 --> 00:34:00,921 - Bravo... - Have a banana. 372 00:34:01,111 --> 00:34:05,353 - Oh! A banana... - Brigitte eats a lot of bananas for her health. 373 00:34:06,070 --> 00:34:11,931 Then eat all you like. I've opened a bottle of 60 year old brandy... 374 00:34:12,082 --> 00:34:14,166 Here's one for Giovannino. 375 00:34:16,859 --> 00:34:21,212 - And one to help you work harder, Mr. Frederico. - Bravo! 376 00:34:21,654 --> 00:34:23,731 I'll show you my latest project later... 377 00:34:26,953 --> 00:34:29,735 This brandy can wake the dead. 378 00:34:30,412 --> 00:34:34,467 Gianfranco doesn't need it, he's always up. 379 00:34:35,601 --> 00:34:39,440 But my nephew and his uncle will benefit... 380 00:34:39,456 --> 00:34:42,583 By the way, Giovannino, you must drink this, and try some of the cakes. 381 00:34:42,657 --> 00:34:46,592 - For you, children. - Thank you, Uncle! 382 00:34:46,599 --> 00:34:48,856 You'll be okay, Giovannino. 383 00:34:57,038 --> 00:35:01,619 As the proverb says: brandy and cakes raise all skirts. 384 00:35:01,908 --> 00:35:05,196 I proved it with my Gianfranco. 385 00:35:08,749 --> 00:35:12,107 I tell you, brandy has an explosive effect. 386 00:35:29,402 --> 00:35:34,174 Gianfranco, can you explain to your wife how to eat that banana? 387 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:40,470 I know how to eat it, but I like to have fun before I finish it. Don't you? 388 00:35:40,486 --> 00:35:44,096 - Isn't that so, Gianfranco? - Yes, everything she says is true. 389 00:35:44,685 --> 00:35:49,328 And he likes to invent new games, especially in bed. 390 00:35:49,477 --> 00:35:52,883 That's why I married him. 391 00:35:52,959 --> 00:35:58,934 What is it called in Italian - those monkeys that make love continuously? 392 00:36:00,746 --> 00:36:04,003 - I'll think about it... - Mandrills! 393 00:36:04,262 --> 00:36:07,227 Bravo ! That's it, mandrills. 394 00:36:07,283 --> 00:36:11,512 Gianfranco is a regular mandrill... 395 00:36:11,823 --> 00:36:16,539 I don't know you, but, well... She doesn't sound like other Germans. 396 00:36:17,675 --> 00:36:22,156 Excuse me, I need a little air. That brandy has my system all worked up. 397 00:36:22,206 --> 00:36:27,661 Giovannino, take this bottle to your room. 398 00:36:36,852 --> 00:36:40,297 - Valentina! - I'm here, Giovannino. 399 00:36:41,604 --> 00:36:46,313 I think my uncle was right, the cakes and brandy are having an effect. 400 00:36:46,615 --> 00:36:49,675 Can it be true? 401 00:36:49,725 --> 00:36:55,501 What are you doing to me, Gianfranco... ? Oh, that's wonderful... ! 402 00:36:55,698 --> 00:37:00,517 I brought her from Germany to teach us how to do it for ourselves. 403 00:37:01,042 --> 00:37:07,648 My love... you're the end of the world! The end of the world... 404 00:37:09,291 --> 00:37:12,051 My own Kama Sutra... 405 00:37:14,803 --> 00:37:19,044 Not bad work with the banana in the other room ... 406 00:37:21,343 --> 00:37:24,570 Of course, not a banana pancake... 407 00:37:31,709 --> 00:37:36,197 That must be some interference on their television. A pair of competitors in the International Games... 408 00:37:36,740 --> 00:37:40,418 Back to our scheduled broadcast. Where was I? Yes... my banana! 409 00:37:41,765 --> 00:37:46,354 My lady... ! 410 00:37:51,347 --> 00:37:56,976 Oh, my mandrill! You're so strong! Harder, harder... 411 00:38:01,405 --> 00:38:07,806 - I saw you eat most of the cakes... - Yes, I did. You are a big bull and my... 412 00:38:08,498 --> 00:38:12,390 - You heard what I said? - ...you're the greatest... 413 00:38:12,975 --> 00:38:17,024 I heard you, but couldn't understand with those two screaming like they're at the supermarket. 414 00:38:17,063 --> 00:38:21,092 Giovannino, why don't we do some shopping ourselves? 415 00:38:22,087 --> 00:38:27,625 - Good, good ... - So, now my Chiquitita is speaking German... 416 00:38:30,735 --> 00:38:35,200 - It's nice, isn't it? - It is, but the banana is for dessert! 417 00:38:35,368 --> 00:38:39,503 - So let's start with the appetizer. - No! Please, let's start with the main course! 418 00:38:41,124 --> 00:38:46,392 ...his eel, thick as a sturgeon... 419 00:38:46,700 --> 00:38:51,181 ... be careful with the fish jokes, otherwise you'll finish without the caviar... 420 00:38:51,981 --> 00:38:57,847 Damn whore! It's like we're at the fish store on Monza Way. 421 00:38:59,732 --> 00:39:03,523 Except there are no fish in here. 422 00:39:04,328 --> 00:39:09,882 Oh, my Doberman, you sex machine, you true Italian! 423 00:39:09,973 --> 00:39:15,187 I knew I: cakes and brandy raises all dresses. I am a lion! 424 00:39:15,277 --> 00:39:18,842 - You may be a lion, but I'm still a virgin... - And I'm a Capricorn with a big... 425 00:39:19,358 --> 00:39:23,533 - What are you doing, Mr. Frederico? - I'm reading your horoscope... 426 00:39:23,567 --> 00:39:26,636 Does it say I will be successful in life? 427 00:39:26,655 --> 00:39:32,329 To my impoverishment! My God, you have a figure! A coat with two buttons here... 428 00:39:32,342 --> 00:39:37,963 It doesn't feel right. I'm still not ready. And I'm still earning minimum wage ... 429 00:39:39,169 --> 00:39:42,725 It seems that a roll in the hay requires union negotiations... 430 00:39:43,109 --> 00:39:47,142 I'll ask Mr. Lama to find you a place on the domestic staff. 431 00:39:48,244 --> 00:39:51,249 Now go to sleep! Did you think that for a nickel raise... 432 00:39:51,250 --> 00:39:52,950 Please don't be mad at me... 433 00:39:52,436 --> 00:39:55,690 - Where you going? - To take a walk in the garden. 434 00:39:55,725 --> 00:39:58,744 Excuse me, Valentina! 435 00:40:02,910 --> 00:40:06,954 What big hands you have, Gianfranco! I just love your hands ... 436 00:40:07,011 --> 00:40:11,248 Caress me, darling... ! 437 00:40:12,358 --> 00:40:17,307 Oh, yes, yes! You really understand my body... 438 00:40:17,988 --> 00:40:25,032 Oh, take me, take me... Softly! Softly! Yes, yes... 439 00:40:25,574 --> 00:40:31,662 No! Don't put your hand there... Not so fast... 440 00:40:31,972 --> 00:40:36,915 Yes... a long caress .... 441 00:40:37,951 --> 00:40:42,405 - You are all I want ... - Yes, yes... 442 00:40:42,475 --> 00:40:45,864 - Oh, Gianfranco... ! - Now! 443 00:41:54,023 --> 00:41:56,063 Giovannino... 444 00:42:05,059 --> 00:42:08,044 Giovannino... 445 00:42:11,256 --> 00:42:16,605 Giovannino... 446 00:42:19,810 --> 00:42:22,360 You called me, my love? 447 00:42:24,859 --> 00:42:27,211 Do you need something? 448 00:42:30,241 --> 00:42:33,398 No! I only wanted to tell you good night. 449 00:42:58,394 --> 00:43:02,295 Gianfranco, do you allow your wife to hang around with her jewels on display? 450 00:43:02,498 --> 00:43:05,638 What can I do? She's a German woman, and that's how they are in Germany. 451 00:43:05,716 --> 00:43:08,948 Yes, but they also have the Berlin Wall. 452 00:43:08,978 --> 00:43:12,260 Why should you care? She enjoys showing it, and doesn't care who looks. 453 00:43:12,359 --> 00:43:16,617 - Would you like some cream? - Yes, thank you! 454 00:43:27,500 --> 00:43:31,276 You have fantastic skin. Giovannino is a lucky man! 455 00:43:32,592 --> 00:43:37,173 I like how it opens the cells! Shall I rub some cream on your breasts? 456 00:43:37,230 --> 00:43:40,302 I'm pretty good, I learned from Gianfranco. 457 00:43:40,345 --> 00:43:43,986 - I can do my own. - Don't tell me you're embarrassed. 458 00:43:44,082 --> 00:43:48,321 - Have courage, don't be ridiculous. - What if Gianfranco and Giovannino see? 459 00:43:48,352 --> 00:43:51,730 You shouldn't look at the negative side all the time. Now turn over... 460 00:44:05,278 --> 00:44:10,078 You know... men may get jealous, but they're only men. 461 00:44:14,049 --> 00:44:21,047 You have fantastic skin. And I like your breasts - they are a true Italian masterpiece. 462 00:44:23,580 --> 00:44:29,162 What a lovely gathering! One comes to the lake to meet beautiful sea creatures such as you... 463 00:44:29,491 --> 00:44:33,390 Good afternoon, Mrs. Arrighini! Stay cool... 464 00:44:33,531 --> 00:44:37,649 Mr. Gianfranco, Mr. Giovannino! Are you're naked, too? 465 00:44:37,736 --> 00:44:40,265 - Have fun! - Thanks! 466 00:44:40,267 --> 00:44:43,236 - Someday I'll take that one aside and thrash him. - Why? He seems to be friendly... ! 467 00:44:43,252 --> 00:44:47,165 Friendly? He's a horny bull! 468 00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:59,128 - Goodbye! - See you soon! 469 00:44:59,435 --> 00:45:03,899 - How's the water, Gianfranco? - Warm! 470 00:45:04,345 --> 00:45:09,318 If you want to go nude, we must leave here. It's too exposed. 471 00:45:09,483 --> 00:45:12,929 We must choose another area. I'll untie the lines... 472 00:45:32,368 --> 00:45:34,398 Come up here! 473 00:45:53,864 --> 00:45:59,833 - Ciao! - Hello, I'm Maurice! Come over here! 474 00:46:00,079 --> 00:46:03,484 - They're cute! - Come on back! 475 00:46:03,484 --> 00:46:06,486 Come, our camp is over here! 476 00:46:06,723 --> 00:46:11,943 - What's he saying? - We've been invited to camp! 477 00:46:12,042 --> 00:46:15,314 Now we're getting together with them? Should I invite the lawyer Caldura, too? 478 00:46:15,382 --> 00:46:18,612 - Let's get out of here! - Come on, friends. 479 00:46:18,648 --> 00:46:21,565 - Come here! - Goodbye! 480 00:46:21,790 --> 00:46:27,981 Come back! 481 00:49:28,028 --> 00:49:30,418 You know that you are simply phenomenal? 482 00:49:31,545 --> 00:49:34,973 - Where did you learn how to be like this? - I learned it from Brigitte yesterday. 483 00:49:34,975 --> 00:49:37,517 She does this for her husband every week. 484 00:49:38,960 --> 00:49:41,239 How you're dressed... 485 00:50:15,688 --> 00:50:17,595 - Hurry, get it off! - Yes. 486 00:50:21,627 --> 00:50:27,712 - You are mine. You are mine... - And you are mine. 487 00:50:27,959 --> 00:50:30,525 - We give ourselves to each other. - Take me, Giovannino. 488 00:50:33,544 --> 00:50:36,286 - This time... - How wonderful... 489 00:50:37,287 --> 00:50:38,987 Yes, yes... 490 00:50:40,188 --> 00:50:41,988 Yes, yes... 491 00:50:48,620 --> 00:50:51,844 Nooooo... 492 00:50:54,410 --> 00:50:57,221 - No, no... - Forgive me! 493 00:51:17,989 --> 00:51:23,436 - What is it? Did Camilla turn you down again? - Cut it out! Everything is fine! 494 00:51:23,991 --> 00:51:27,850 It's Giovannino that worries me. He seems to be in a coma, like something's missing... 495 00:51:28,655 --> 00:51:31,798 The same problem? He can't get it up? 496 00:51:32,778 --> 00:51:36,278 Do you know everything? Who are you, the newspaper owner's daughter? 497 00:51:36,558 --> 00:51:39,098 Everyone in town knows, Frederico! 498 00:51:39,664 --> 00:51:42,328 If even one person could mind his own business... 499 00:51:42,394 --> 00:51:45,430 - You know I'd help if I could? - I know... 500 00:51:45,826 --> 00:51:49,792 Right now I'm so agitated I can hardly get it up myself... 501 00:51:52,355 --> 00:51:56,087 Love, love, love... 502 00:51:56,288 --> 00:51:58,088 My love! 503 00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:01,632 Every time another game of love ... 504 00:52:02,602 --> 00:52:06,339 Every time a new surgery for your patient... 505 00:52:08,264 --> 00:52:12,872 - Yes, my love... - Oh, my beautiful baby... 506 00:52:13,290 --> 00:52:16,559 Oh, my Carthaginian! Meow, meow ... 507 00:52:22,058 --> 00:52:25,071 I can't stop. I can't stop! Yes... 508 00:52:29,941 --> 00:52:32,500 I'm about to win the gold medal... 509 00:52:33,944 --> 00:52:37,531 My stallion... My lesbian... 510 00:52:54,619 --> 00:52:59,786 Get a grip on yourself, Valentina! Your expectations will destroy you if... 511 00:53:00,554 --> 00:53:03,125 I was destroyed the day we married, Uncle. 512 00:53:03,847 --> 00:53:07,363 - You are right! - What is happiness, Uncle Frederico? 513 00:53:09,846 --> 00:53:14,391 - I understand you're missing that... - Anyone can see them! 514 00:53:15,941 --> 00:53:18,368 Some do it too much... others not at all. 515 00:53:21,082 --> 00:53:23,702 They are on fire all the time! 516 00:53:24,844 --> 00:53:30,545 I can't bear to listen. It's the passion... of youth. 517 00:53:32,088 --> 00:53:34,420 It's something you wouldn't understand. 518 00:53:34,500 --> 00:53:39,987 No, no! Believe me, I understand it well. It's your husband who doesn't understand. 519 00:53:40,097 --> 00:53:44,491 How can a woman like you fail? Two beautiful eyes... 520 00:53:46,426 --> 00:53:48,081 Two beautiful... 521 00:53:49,382 --> 00:53:50,982 So beautiful... 522 00:53:51,027 --> 00:53:52,766 Yes, but why tell me? 523 00:53:52,853 --> 00:53:56,680 You have everything it takes to make one man happy... even two men. 524 00:53:58,564 --> 00:54:01,042 Ten men... a hundred men ... 525 00:54:02,332 --> 00:54:08,649 - How good are you, Uncle... - Me? You're the good one... a saint. 526 00:54:09,750 --> 00:54:13,958 A saint? I can't take it anymore. I'll go crazy! 527 00:54:14,608 --> 00:54:18,572 You're telling me? Your husband should have his tool cut off. 528 00:54:19,049 --> 00:54:22,005 Yes, you're right. 529 00:54:22,085 --> 00:54:25,688 Your arms are so strong, Uncle Frederico... 530 00:54:26,027 --> 00:54:29,132 I take vitamins for my health. But about you... 531 00:54:29,191 --> 00:54:31,288 You're so soft... 532 00:54:33,913 --> 00:54:37,180 You have muscles of iron, Uncle Frederico... 533 00:54:38,154 --> 00:54:43,134 - How about we play Little Red Riding Hood? - And you'll be the big bad wolf and eat me? 534 00:54:43,221 --> 00:54:47,251 - Now I'm going to eat you up! - Uncle Frederico... 535 00:54:47,317 --> 00:54:49,207 I'll eat you up... 536 00:54:49,478 --> 00:54:52,184 How lovely your skin is! It feels like velvet. 537 00:54:52,241 --> 00:54:54,284 It feels like velvet... 538 00:54:54,685 --> 00:54:56,685 It feels like velvet... 539 00:54:58,865 --> 00:55:00,870 Oh... it is velvet. 540 00:55:12,033 --> 00:55:16,580 - Mr. Frederico! - Yes, Mrs. Lucia! 541 00:55:17,003 --> 00:55:19,159 I must speak with you. It's urgent. 542 00:55:20,090 --> 00:55:22,631 - It's about those rumors, isn't it? - Yes, about those rumors. 543 00:55:22,871 --> 00:55:26,093 Do we need to talk right here at factory? Just a moment! 544 00:55:26,173 --> 00:55:28,403 - Go and fill that with oil. - Very well, Mr. Frederico! 545 00:55:28,439 --> 00:55:30,445 Let's take a walk... 546 00:55:31,215 --> 00:55:33,941 They must cut the rope, Mr. Frederico. Things can't continue as they are. 547 00:55:34,034 --> 00:55:36,108 I think this marriage must be annulled. 548 00:55:36,602 --> 00:55:41,838 Arrighini won't accept an annulment. He doesn't want to turn this tragedy into a scandal. 549 00:55:41,952 --> 00:55:45,888 The scandal is yours, but I've paid for the tragedy. 550 00:55:46,324 --> 00:55:49,808 When you think that I gave the best parties. 551 00:55:49,866 --> 00:55:54,218 The Mayor's son, several professors... Just to mention a couple... 552 00:55:54,238 --> 00:55:58,472 Those two together don't add up to a quarter of my nephew. 553 00:55:58,497 --> 00:56:02,302 I forgot the attorney Caldura, who inherited a fortune... 554 00:56:02,790 --> 00:56:05,359 He has the wealth of a prince. A true aristocrat ... 555 00:56:05,590 --> 00:56:12,142 Listen, Mrs. Lucia! Giovannino isn't a prince or a lawyer, but he's an honest man. 556 00:56:12,486 --> 00:56:15,014 Although when he's needed in bed he's like a dead man? 557 00:56:15,212 --> 00:56:21,266 Speak with your nephew, and keep in mind that girl is like a flower... a real woman. 558 00:56:21,655 --> 00:56:27,374 Yes! A real woman can make you lose your head. Just as you said... 559 00:56:27,395 --> 00:56:29,139 Do you know where he is? 560 00:56:29,286 --> 00:56:33,998 Of course, he's staying at my house. I see him every day... 561 00:56:34,358 --> 00:56:41,166 Don't worry, Mrs. Lucia, I'll take care of Giovannino, even if it costs me a fortune. 562 00:56:41,214 --> 00:56:45,623 - I'll send him to Dr. Barnard. - Why do that? He's a heart doctor. 563 00:56:45,731 --> 00:56:48,535 He's a magician. He can treat the male organ. 564 00:56:48,623 --> 00:56:50,832 Let's move on, Mrs. Lucia. 565 00:57:05,784 --> 00:57:10,557 This may upset you, and I repeat, the mafia doesn't exist. But if it does, it has long hands. 566 00:57:10,646 --> 00:57:14,672 There's no need to worry, the Tribunal president is my friend. 567 00:57:14,735 --> 00:57:18,136 Excuse me, I have urgent business! 568 00:57:32,450 --> 00:57:36,344 - I need to speak with you, Mrs. Valentina. - You're such a pest! 569 00:57:36,391 --> 00:57:40,064 I know that I'm a pest, but I followed you with great discretion. 570 00:57:40,085 --> 00:57:44,355 - You have behaved quite badly. - I need to talk to you. Give me an hour. 571 00:57:44,371 --> 00:57:49,092 - You exaggerate, Lawyer Caldura. - My exaggeration reflects the importance of the case. 572 00:57:49,888 --> 00:57:56,843 - Please, Mrs. Valentina! I beg you! - Very well, I'll give you half an hour. 573 00:57:57,682 --> 00:58:01,490 Half an hour? Alright. Climb in, Mrs. Valentina! 574 00:58:02,574 --> 00:58:04,970 Quickly... get in! 575 00:58:05,052 --> 00:58:07,186 Please, over here! 576 00:58:10,657 --> 00:58:12,749 Watch out for the door! 577 00:58:16,014 --> 00:58:18,381 So, let's go... 578 00:58:25,947 --> 00:58:27,747 Why did you bring me here? 579 00:58:27,818 --> 00:58:32,324 I thought getting out in a natural setting may help us, Mrs. Valentina. 580 00:58:34,989 --> 00:58:42,454 The trees, the lake... walking paths and a gentle breeze. Who could ask for anything more? 581 00:58:42,670 --> 00:58:44,276 At least that is my hope. 582 00:58:44,277 --> 00:58:46,477 I don't believe you... and never expect to. 583 00:58:46,578 --> 00:58:49,175 I'd be lying to say I hadn't planned on deceiving you. 584 00:58:49,376 --> 00:58:52,276 And you delude yourself in thinking your continued insistance will work. 585 00:58:52,443 --> 00:58:56,121 I'm not delusional! All of life is an illusion. 586 00:59:00,896 --> 00:59:02,813 - What... ? - It's a more intimate this way... 587 00:59:02,959 --> 00:59:07,582 - I love you, Mrs. Valentina. I love you... - Please, Mr. Lawyer... ! 588 00:59:07,681 --> 00:59:10,018 I can't resist you, Mrs. Valentina... 589 00:59:11,019 --> 00:59:13,019 - I want to leave... - Where do you want to go? 590 00:59:13,059 --> 00:59:15,855 - Don't touch me! - How can I not touch you... ? 591 00:59:15,870 --> 00:59:18,015 That is why I brought you here! 592 00:59:18,033 --> 00:59:20,339 Don't touch me, or I'll scream! 593 00:59:23,415 --> 00:59:27,251 Why are you so cynical and cruel? I thought it was finally time... 594 00:59:27,297 --> 00:59:29,812 You were wrong to think so, Mr. Lawyer. 595 00:59:33,366 --> 00:59:37,410 - I see no one around, Mrs. Valentina. - Then I'll get out of the car. 596 00:59:37,528 --> 00:59:39,849 No, wait! We'll go... 597 00:59:39,989 --> 00:59:46,559 We'll go, my friend! Lawyer Caldura is a gentleman! 598 00:59:47,986 --> 00:59:51,770 A gentleman discarded... and dying in despair. 599 00:59:55,819 --> 01:00:00,259 The sun! Smell the country air, feel the gentle breeze. 600 01:00:01,246 --> 01:00:06,658 This was a good idea. I can feel all my stress relieved by this peace and quiet. 601 01:00:06,658 --> 01:00:11,810 That makes me happy. I thought that getting out in nature would help. 602 01:00:11,885 --> 01:00:15,286 It's true. I feel refreshed. I feel like a new man. 603 01:00:23,167 --> 01:00:28,112 Birds in the air, dew on the grass... 604 01:00:28,182 --> 01:00:31,351 - Bees buzzing... - A bee!? 605 01:00:31,430 --> 01:00:34,022 Don't worry about the bees. They've behaved themselves so far... 606 01:00:36,187 --> 01:00:41,927 - You're sweet as honey... - Kiss me, Giovannino! 607 01:00:51,317 --> 01:00:53,193 Lie down... 608 01:00:58,117 --> 01:01:00,361 This time... 609 01:01:10,079 --> 01:01:12,928 I feel like a sinful Adam in an earthly paradise. 610 01:01:13,037 --> 01:01:15,644 And I feel like the virgin Eve. 611 01:01:16,019 --> 01:01:18,249 - Give me the apple, Eve! - Yes... 612 01:01:26,028 --> 01:01:29,931 Since we're playing Adam and Eve, we had to have an apple. 613 01:01:30,028 --> 01:01:32,997 - Naturally... - So, are we going to commit this sin? 614 01:01:45,211 --> 01:01:47,512 - Giovannino! - What? 615 01:01:47,833 --> 01:01:50,211 Look there! A serpent! 616 01:01:52,309 --> 01:01:56,650 Of course, we were Adam and Eve with their apple. All that was missing was the serpent. 617 01:02:23,273 --> 01:02:25,208 Your German woman sings beautifully! 618 01:02:25,622 --> 01:02:28,592 Yes, she took lessons from Patty Brau, particularly the lyrics. 619 01:02:28,778 --> 01:02:30,950 I don't understand anything she's saying. 620 01:02:31,158 --> 01:02:34,649 - Who... your wife? - No, Patty Brau! 621 01:02:56,854 --> 01:03:00,454 I'm finished, Mr. Gianfranco. 622 01:03:02,437 --> 01:03:07,594 Do you know you have a beautiful body? Perhaps I should examine your eyes. 623 01:03:07,608 --> 01:03:10,668 - They're fine. - All of you is fine... 624 01:03:11,072 --> 01:03:12,963 I know! Everyone says that, even your wife. 625 01:03:12,979 --> 01:03:14,443 Yes? 626 01:03:15,455 --> 01:03:21,887 - Don't you know that I'm a virgin, Mr. Gianfranco? - Well, now I'll just have to take your virginity. 627 01:03:22,232 --> 01:03:26,824 - What if your wife comes down? - I'll put her on the waiting list. 628 01:03:26,897 --> 01:03:29,546 - I service an international clientele. - No... 629 01:03:30,666 --> 01:03:32,818 What, right here in the pantry? 630 01:03:38,304 --> 01:03:44,420 Uncle Frederico! I'd have hurried, if I'd known you were waiting. 631 01:03:44,911 --> 01:03:48,853 Please! Ladies first. Especially beautiful ladies. 632 01:03:48,894 --> 01:03:53,261 Thank you! You're very kind. What's that you're wearing?! 633 01:03:53,811 --> 01:03:57,367 It's Arab sportswear. From one Arafat to another. 634 01:03:58,281 --> 01:04:01,695 Nice melons! Like we used to say: you have to squeeze to see if they're ripe! 635 01:04:03,205 --> 01:04:06,390 - Have you seen Gianfranco? - Gianfranco, he's gone... ! 636 01:04:06,892 --> 01:04:11,158 And Camilla and Gabriella! All gone! Do you need something? 637 01:04:11,284 --> 01:04:14,942 Gianfranco always gives me a massage after my bath. 638 01:04:14,953 --> 01:04:18,341 You're in luck! I once worked in Milan... 639 01:04:18,875 --> 01:04:22,886 ...and had a job massaging a German girl. Then she got a moped and I never saw her again. 640 01:04:23,621 --> 01:04:26,393 - May I give you massage? - You'd do me? 641 01:04:26,572 --> 01:04:30,458 Come on! 642 01:04:44,009 --> 01:04:49,672 - Mamma mia, what a nice tool... - What did you think, this was Giovannino's dick? 643 01:04:50,193 --> 01:04:53,487 - Wait... I grabbed a salami. - Okay... we see about that... 644 01:04:59,543 --> 01:05:02,960 ...the other players and Beckembauer, except that he had an injury... 645 01:05:02,961 --> 01:05:05,490 ...otherwise he would have been a footballer. 646 01:05:05,519 --> 01:05:10,503 Not so hard, Uncle Frederico! Softly... gently. 647 01:05:10,592 --> 01:05:13,826 - More softly and gently... - Yes! 648 01:05:15,078 --> 01:05:20,637 Yes... that's better. 649 01:05:20,693 --> 01:05:23,299 Good... 650 01:05:26,066 --> 01:05:31,141 - Is it good for you? - Yes, it's good... so far! 651 01:05:31,862 --> 01:05:36,516 The man with the velvet hands! You know you feel better than Beckembauer? 652 01:05:36,562 --> 01:05:38,499 Really? 653 01:05:45,234 --> 01:05:47,701 What a figure! Your body looks like a wavy line. 654 01:05:47,817 --> 01:05:50,832 Now a little higher. Do my breasts, Uncle! 655 01:05:56,085 --> 01:06:03,136 This is more than a massage, Uncle. I think you intend to mount me! 656 01:06:05,013 --> 01:06:08,269 A joke is a joke, but when it comes to sex... 657 01:06:08,352 --> 01:06:12,395 ...Uncle Frederico skips past the Maginot Line and cuts through the Iron Curtain. 658 01:06:12,471 --> 01:06:15,568 My torch burns for your body... 659 01:06:15,654 --> 01:06:18,613 Come, girl! How do the Arabs do it in these dresses? 660 01:06:29,914 --> 01:06:31,966 What's going on in there? 661 01:06:33,374 --> 01:06:41,628 Nothing! I was just looking for ingredients to make an omelet. A French frittata. 662 01:06:41,729 --> 01:06:43,672 What was that, an earthquake? 663 01:06:43,673 --> 01:06:45,043 What's going on here? 664 01:06:47,097 --> 01:06:52,044 Mr. Gianfranco wanted to teach Camilla how to make a French frittata. 665 01:06:52,077 --> 01:06:57,808 - That's right. Not very practical, but... - But see that you like German frittatas, no? 666 01:07:02,507 --> 01:07:05,448 - You know what I like about you, Gabriella? - What? 667 01:07:05,449 --> 01:07:11,492 Nothing, absolutely nothing. Gianfranco, a frittata is just a frittata... 668 01:07:11,987 --> 01:07:15,869 The eggs are always found at the bottom! 669 01:07:21,781 --> 01:07:23,835 Even the German got it... 670 01:07:26,491 --> 01:07:33,022 I am sure that after three or four months at our factory in Germany ... 671 01:07:33,022 --> 01:07:36,480 Moving to a foreign country can work miracles. 672 01:07:36,519 --> 01:07:39,671 Of course it doesn't mean exile for the rest of your life. 673 01:07:39,703 --> 01:07:42,728 I think a brief visit should do it. 674 01:07:42,804 --> 01:07:47,034 This also concerns Valentina. She'll remain at home. 675 01:07:47,998 --> 01:07:52,145 You won't miss out anything. You'll be in the company of Gianfranco and Brigitte. 676 01:07:56,568 --> 01:08:01,232 They are quite liberal... Practicing their native tongue. 677 01:08:01,293 --> 01:08:04,808 If I allow my paternal affection... 678 01:08:05,718 --> 01:08:09,466 Not really paternal... but nearly! 679 01:08:09,518 --> 01:08:12,859 As I understand it, you want to send me to a German concentration camp... 680 01:08:12,938 --> 01:08:16,164 ...because I won't collaborate with the allies. 681 01:08:16,467 --> 01:08:19,675 - You're acting like a Nazi, Uncle Frederico. - Stop talking shit. 682 01:08:19,755 --> 01:08:25,437 - And why do you want me to go alone? - Valentina can visit when you're restored. 683 01:08:25,495 --> 01:08:28,594 And how will we know when I'm restored? 684 01:08:28,915 --> 01:08:32,498 - When, ah... - When, ah? Come on, tell me! 685 01:08:33,027 --> 01:08:36,280 I don't know! When you've recovered from your birth defect. 686 01:08:36,281 --> 01:08:38,681 I'll get you some hormones from a cat in heat. 687 01:08:38,690 --> 01:08:42,743 - You got it? - I'm not moving there... period! 688 01:08:43,934 --> 01:08:47,380 This is an issue that only concerns me and my wife. 689 01:08:47,505 --> 01:08:50,597 And it seems she has decided. 690 01:08:50,690 --> 01:08:55,468 On the advice of her mother, I have no more to say on the matter. 691 01:08:56,043 --> 01:09:01,288 Just when you think you've seen everything, she takes the prize. 692 01:09:02,263 --> 01:09:06,463 I thought I'd married an understanding, loving girl... 693 01:09:07,112 --> 01:09:12,494 But when we're in bed, her only concern is whether she's lying next to a bull. 694 01:09:12,561 --> 01:09:15,718 Which must mean that I am married to a cow. 695 01:09:15,783 --> 01:09:20,456 What are you saying, Giovannino? Do you want to hear the truth? 696 01:09:21,046 --> 01:09:25,362 I gave you love, loyalty, understanding, affection. I gave you all I could give. 697 01:09:25,971 --> 01:09:31,700 And when erotic thoughts come to me, my heart pounds with sexual desire. 698 01:09:32,347 --> 01:09:35,919 And if my husband can't perform, what can I do? Call Giovannino's cardiologist? 699 01:09:36,308 --> 01:09:39,749 To have him confirm that you're a cow? 700 01:09:39,768 --> 01:09:42,941 Get out of here, you impotent eunuch! 701 01:09:43,013 --> 01:09:46,352 I don't want to see you in this house again. 702 01:09:46,441 --> 01:09:52,421 Mother of God, my love is going to drown herself in the lake. My poor angel! 703 01:09:53,029 --> 01:09:57,212 What lake, Mama? You know where that door goes? That goes to... 704 01:09:57,350 --> 01:10:00,403 - Valentina! - My little... 705 01:10:00,909 --> 01:10:04,552 Giovannino! Mrs. Lucia! 706 01:10:04,952 --> 01:10:09,033 You two sit still, don't make a fuss. Nothing will happen... 707 01:10:09,064 --> 01:10:15,055 - Valentina! Valentina! - She's gone to the lake. A suicide. I feel it! 708 01:10:29,008 --> 01:10:32,626 Valentina! 709 01:10:35,254 --> 01:10:37,948 - This is terrible... - Let's split up. 710 01:10:37,953 --> 01:10:40,749 - I'll go this way... you go that way. - Oh, Mother of God... 711 01:10:40,749 --> 01:10:44,774 Maybe we'd better take the boat so we can search the bank. 712 01:11:19,671 --> 01:11:23,349 - Lord ... help us find her... - Pray later. Now, sit down! 713 01:11:39,345 --> 01:11:43,655 We can't get close enough. Maybe it would be better to notify the police. 714 01:11:44,644 --> 01:11:47,449 You're right, Mama. Let's go back. 715 01:12:17,541 --> 01:12:20,663 - What happened, why did you stop? - It's out of gas. 716 01:12:20,719 --> 01:12:24,761 - Now what? - I can only paddle. 717 01:12:28,013 --> 01:12:30,045 Put this on, Mama! 718 01:12:36,144 --> 01:12:39,080 I'll be damned, everything happens to me. 719 01:12:48,357 --> 01:12:51,625 What are you doing there, sitting on a rock? 720 01:12:57,829 --> 01:12:59,812 Put this on! 721 01:13:00,750 --> 01:13:02,789 Come along! 722 01:13:09,601 --> 01:13:16,467 Courage Mama, a fishing lodge is just a hundred meters from here. 723 01:13:17,511 --> 01:13:20,190 We'll shelter there. Have courage! 724 01:13:23,186 --> 01:13:25,211 Come here. 725 01:13:28,002 --> 01:13:31,072 Hello, won't you please join us, miss! 726 01:13:31,464 --> 01:13:32,972 Go inside! Please... 727 01:13:48,417 --> 01:13:50,680 We made it. Put the fender over the side! 728 01:13:58,207 --> 01:13:59,996 Let me help you. 729 01:14:01,431 --> 01:14:05,997 Come Mama, stay with me. Take care, it's slippery. 730 01:14:46,022 --> 01:14:50,076 It will be my fault if anything happens to Valentina. 731 01:14:51,332 --> 01:14:54,960 Please don't talk like that, Giovannino. 732 01:14:55,038 --> 01:15:01,287 Valentina is no longer a child. Now get those clothes off! You'll catch pneumonia. 733 01:15:38,791 --> 01:15:40,713 - Are you tired? - Yes. 734 01:15:41,092 --> 01:15:44,884 Then why don't you rest? Here, lie down on the bed. 735 01:15:51,759 --> 01:15:54,405 - Would you like a drink? - Please. 736 01:15:56,000 --> 01:15:59,245 Here! Drink some whiskey. 737 01:16:21,127 --> 01:16:24,507 Stop, Giovannino. You mustn't despair. 738 01:16:24,960 --> 01:16:29,119 I'm sure nothing will happen to Valentina. 739 01:16:29,206 --> 01:16:32,612 It was just a stupid hysterical crisis. 740 01:16:32,693 --> 01:16:39,688 She's a very practical girl, not stupid. I have taught her well. 741 01:16:40,239 --> 01:16:46,092 Mama! Where are you, mama? I want my mother! 742 01:16:46,407 --> 01:16:53,575 Mama? You raised me by yourself. And you were so lonely. 743 01:16:54,595 --> 01:16:56,767 I want my mother. 744 01:16:57,432 --> 01:17:02,664 Hush now, my love. I'll be your mother. 745 01:17:04,847 --> 01:17:10,038 Don't cry, my treasure, Tell me your troubles. 746 01:17:11,835 --> 01:17:15,353 I want my mother ... 747 01:18:00,458 --> 01:18:02,734 My mama... 748 01:18:13,119 --> 01:18:16,844 You feel so warm, mama. 749 01:19:41,630 --> 01:19:45,010 At last, my love... 750 01:19:45,326 --> 01:19:51,861 - Mama... - My beloved. My lover... 751 01:19:58,468 --> 01:20:06,186 - Thank you, Mama! - What a man you are, Giovannino... 752 01:20:50,171 --> 01:20:53,633 - Isn't that your boat, Don Frederico? - I don't know, let me see. 753 01:20:59,226 --> 01:21:02,316 - Yes, that's my boat. - Tie up to it! 754 01:21:02,535 --> 01:21:05,843 Go faster... 755 01:21:11,953 --> 01:21:16,130 - Giovannino! - Again? 756 01:21:16,519 --> 01:21:19,764 No... I hear a boat. 757 01:21:27,912 --> 01:21:32,627 - Giovannino... - It's Uncle Frederico. 758 01:21:32,718 --> 01:21:36,405 He brought the police. Quickly! Get dressed. 759 01:21:36,596 --> 01:21:40,871 Mrs. Lucia... Giovannino! 760 01:21:41,177 --> 01:21:45,651 Where you are? It's Uncle Frederico. 761 01:21:45,878 --> 01:21:50,007 - Finally... Frederico. - Thank goodness you found us, Uncle. 762 01:21:50,493 --> 01:21:54,989 Valentina is okay, Giovannino. Some French campers rescued her. 763 01:21:55,094 --> 01:21:59,178 She's in good health. In fact, I've never seen anyone in such good health. 764 01:22:00,202 --> 01:22:04,205 I thought you should know, Mama. 765 01:22:04,748 --> 01:22:08,882 Yes, I'm so happy for you ... 766 01:22:08,903 --> 01:22:13,486 I've been thinking about this whole scandal... 767 01:22:14,711 --> 01:22:17,310 - Was your rescue alright? - Alright? 768 01:22:17,448 --> 01:22:21,907 Why, it was beautiful! It was beautiful because he was beautiful. 769 01:22:21,908 --> 01:22:24,508 Beautiful any way you want it to mean. 770 01:22:24,927 --> 01:22:27,568 And Giovannino, when will he discover... 771 01:22:27,660 --> 01:22:31,257 When will he figure it out? He doesn't know about these things. 772 01:22:31,579 --> 01:22:35,299 Now what should I do? The fact that I've been used... 773 01:22:36,517 --> 01:22:40,102 - You told me to get an annulment... - An annulment? 774 01:22:40,660 --> 01:22:44,174 No! No... don't annul anything. 775 01:22:44,257 --> 01:22:48,053 - Do you want a scandal, as well as a tragedy? - But you told me to leave him. 776 01:22:48,359 --> 01:22:51,075 No one is going to be left. He's part of the family now. 777 01:22:52,823 --> 01:22:55,960 - Just yesterday you said ... - One moment, Valentina! 778 01:22:56,310 --> 01:22:59,889 Yesterday was yesterday. And today is today ... 779 01:23:01,124 --> 01:23:04,461 Why not go to him now and try again. He is a strong boy. 780 01:23:04,848 --> 01:23:08,400 A plant that sits in the shade and is wilted ... if the rain comes, it blooms. 781 01:23:08,851 --> 01:23:13,409 Your mother may not understand plants very well, but men... she knows well. 782 01:23:13,678 --> 01:23:17,402 You need to know how to use what you've learned on Giovannino. 783 01:23:17,680 --> 01:23:24,133 I'm sure after last night's experience, a new Giovannino was born. 784 01:23:24,585 --> 01:23:28,853 How do you know? How can you be so sure? Who told you? 785 01:23:30,325 --> 01:23:35,278 A mother's intuition. A mother is always right. 786 01:23:57,233 --> 01:24:02,792 You want to stop with that foot, Mr. Frederico? Don't expect a miracle. 787 01:24:02,834 --> 01:24:07,268 Please understand, Mrs. Lucia, it's just a nervous impulse... 788 01:24:07,496 --> 01:24:10,225 Why can't we play pinch-pinch, Gianfranco? 789 01:24:10,235 --> 01:24:13,000 They get to do it and we don't, my mandrill? 790 01:24:14,662 --> 01:24:19,253 Sit quietly now, fedayeen! We need to concentrate on... 791 01:24:30,073 --> 01:24:33,995 - Be careful, you mental case! - Excuse me, Mr. Frederico! 792 01:24:34,078 --> 01:24:37,548 Put the tray down carefully and go. This is very important. 793 01:24:46,916 --> 01:24:49,929 - Hey! You scratched me with a fingernail. - Excuse me, I did it on purpose. 794 01:24:50,014 --> 01:24:51,896 - Then you're forgiven... - Brigitte! 795 01:24:51,977 --> 01:24:54,933 Even at this delicate time, is sex the only thing you can think about? 796 01:24:59,112 --> 01:25:00,885 Mama Lucia! 797 01:25:04,217 --> 01:25:08,065 Please come in and help us for a few minutes. 798 01:25:26,033 --> 01:25:30,864 - What's this? All three in the bedroom? - How nice, a threesome... 799 01:25:31,041 --> 01:25:32,777 Quiet, you gorilla! 800 01:25:33,896 --> 01:25:39,395 You have 30 seconds... give me his name. If not, I'll kill you. You and her. 801 01:25:39,458 --> 01:25:44,974 - I'll slaughter everyone! I swear it! - Stop, Giovannino! No more screaming! 802 01:25:44,994 --> 01:25:49,034 If you don't, you'll bring on a scandal and make the headlines. Just calm down, my dear! 803 01:25:49,094 --> 01:25:51,965 How can I calm down, Mama? Do you understand what's happened? 804 01:25:52,482 --> 01:25:58,046 This goddamn slut gave her virginity while we suffered through the storm. 805 01:25:58,470 --> 01:26:00,607 Shouldn't I have been her first? 806 01:26:00,728 --> 01:26:02,572 Shut up, Giovannino! 807 01:26:02,573 --> 01:26:06,174 No! She just told me about it, and I have something to say. 808 01:26:06,175 --> 01:26:10,548 - I want to know who it was and why she did it! - That's enough Giovannino! Shut your mouth! 809 01:26:11,588 --> 01:26:16,260 Now you two listen to me! All this shit is unimportant. 810 01:26:16,539 --> 01:26:19,777 What's important is your reputations. 811 01:26:19,903 --> 01:26:23,346 First! Who can claim the glory of being a virgin today? Second... 812 01:26:23,503 --> 01:26:26,421 Second. In my opinion, there's no other way; Giovannino must go to Germany. 813 01:26:26,429 --> 01:26:30,898 - Oh, poor Valentina! - I do not know that you should complain. 814 01:26:31,092 --> 01:26:35,081 Valentina can console herself if she wants, but poor Giovannino... 815 01:26:37,808 --> 01:26:40,239 Sit back, everything is in order. 816 01:26:40,240 --> 01:26:43,789 It was just a little misunderstanding. Everything has been resolved. 817 01:26:43,203 --> 01:26:46,027 All's well that ends well! 818 01:26:46,114 --> 01:26:48,162 They played pinch-pinch! 819 01:26:50,502 --> 01:26:53,558 - So did they? - All the way! 820 01:26:53,627 --> 01:26:57,202 This calls for some hot, strong coffee. Gabriela! 821 01:26:57,207 --> 01:27:01,420 - Two strong coffees! - And pour the brandy. Several brandies... 822 01:27:01,425 --> 01:27:04,499 And now some news for everyone. 823 01:27:04,521 --> 01:27:08,515 Tomorrow, Giovannino and Valentina are coming to live with me. 824 01:27:10,103 --> 01:27:13,782 - Why? Don't they feel comfortable here? - Of course, but try and be understanding! 825 01:27:14,287 --> 01:27:18,516 You ask for a reason. Although they're comfortable in this house... 826 01:27:19,129 --> 01:27:23,689 Giovannino will have an Oedipus complex as long as he remains here. 827 01:27:25,204 --> 01:27:29,357 - So that's what happened to him ... - It's a bit hard to explain. 828 01:27:29,373 --> 01:27:31,620 I try to explain everything in a few words.... 829 01:27:31,627 --> 01:27:38,971 To do his job as a husband, Giovannino must get away from his home turf. 830 01:27:39,070 --> 01:27:42,853 In this house, he misses his mother. 831 01:27:43,261 --> 01:27:44,626 Is it true, Giovannino? 832 01:27:46,427 --> 01:27:49,227 Answer him, Giovannino! 833 01:27:49,556 --> 01:27:52,438 Yes, it's like Mama said! It's true! I must go to her home. 834 01:27:53,669 --> 01:28:00,414 Congratulations, Mrs. Lucia! You saved my nephew from Oedipus. 835 01:28:00,731 --> 01:28:05,581 - If someone is worth saving... - And you know the right way... 836 01:28:06,480 --> 01:28:10,687 - Are you jealous? - A little ... 837 01:28:11,530 --> 01:28:15,994 Please, allow me to visit you from time to time. 838 01:28:16,101 --> 01:28:21,298 - Do you have an Oedipus complex as well? - No, my complex is that I don't like to be alone. 839 01:28:21,786 --> 01:28:25,550 I'm a guy who can find consolation quickly. 840 01:28:26,340 --> 01:28:31,963 It would be better if the children don't see us. If you want, I'll come to visit you. 841 01:28:33,160 --> 01:28:38,452 If that's what you prefer, I have no objection... even without an Oedipus complex. 842 01:29:18,647 --> 01:29:22,413 - Have you heard the latest news? - I always know about everything. 843 01:29:22,506 --> 01:29:24,866 What do you think about it, Mr. Lawyer? 844 01:29:25,845 --> 01:29:30,210 It's not important what I think, but people say that Giovannino... 845 01:29:31,006 --> 01:29:35,540 I know! The mother-in-law brought him under her roof. 846 01:29:35,675 --> 01:29:41,557 You heard it right, Lieutenant. But did the mother- in-law bring him under her roof or into her bed? 847 01:29:41,578 --> 01:29:43,916 Into her bed... 848 01:30:59,878 --> 01:31:05,915 Adapted from Romanian translation by cristiano.ferocci@gmail.com BlackSeaTeam 76720