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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,239 --> 00:00:05,297 We'll actually go and look over here. 2 00:00:05,337 --> 00:00:06,900 There's a young girl over here. 3 00:00:07,402 --> 00:00:10,500 She might have been left behind by her friends, be feeling a bit lost. 4 00:00:10,555 --> 00:00:12,321 She might need some sort of assistance. 5 00:00:12,863 --> 00:00:14,236 Should go and see if she's OK. 6 00:00:15,844 --> 00:00:16,654 Hello, love. 7 00:00:17,647 --> 00:00:18,337 Hi, there. 8 00:00:19,796 --> 00:00:21,339 She's very quiet. Um... 9 00:00:22,469 --> 00:00:24,353 Oh. Are you all right? 10 00:00:27,996 --> 00:00:28,843 I guess that's a no. 11 00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:34,082 I mean, yeah, this is very unusual. 12 00:00:34,168 --> 00:00:36,899 I mean, that's a lot to come out of quite a small person. 13 00:00:37,698 --> 00:00:39,298 I think she's clearly quite unwell. 14 00:00:39,782 --> 00:00:41,729 I mean, we wanna know what's happened to her tonight, 15 00:00:41,769 --> 00:00:44,019 and what's made her vomit like this. 16 00:00:44,066 --> 00:00:45,319 Let it out. Get it... 17 00:00:46,012 --> 00:00:48,082 Over that way is better. Get it all out. 18 00:00:48,160 --> 00:00:49,560 I'm gonna request for assistance. 19 00:00:49,660 --> 00:00:51,983 Minogue, requesting assistance over here. 20 00:00:53,081 --> 00:00:54,730 'Copy, O'Leary, what's your location?' 21 00:00:54,770 --> 00:00:55,922 I'm right behind you. 22 00:00:56,975 --> 00:00:57,733 'Travelling.' 23 00:00:58,201 --> 00:00:59,748 Yeah, we've gotta get this girl to her caregivers. 24 00:00:59,788 --> 00:01:01,560 She's- Look, she's really unwell. 25 00:01:02,265 --> 00:01:03,260 What's your name, love? 26 00:01:03,635 --> 00:01:06,512 Bazual of the Unholy Realm. 27 00:01:06,605 --> 00:01:11,742 - We've got B. I've got B-A... - Bazual of the Unholy Realm. 28 00:01:11,782 --> 00:01:12,360 OK. 29 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:13,989 As members of the New Zealand Police Force, 30 00:01:14,029 --> 00:01:16,506 it's our job to offer support to those in need, 31 00:01:16,546 --> 00:01:19,331 uh, and that takes the support and the respect of the community. 32 00:01:19,378 --> 00:01:21,434 Absolutely. It really does. 33 00:01:21,474 --> 00:01:23,636 Is that the Unholy Realm in Haitaitai? 34 00:01:25,499 --> 00:01:27,132 Officer down. 35 00:01:27,172 --> 00:01:28,193 I've got an officer down. 36 00:01:28,287 --> 00:01:29,428 Officer back up! 37 00:01:30,071 --> 00:01:32,991 See, look, he's back up. That was a bit uncalled for. 38 00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:38,508 Comms, we're bringing in a juvenile female for drunk and disorderly, 39 00:01:38,548 --> 00:01:41,680 and, uh, charging her with throwing a police officer. Over. 40 00:01:42,605 --> 00:01:44,579 Do you know how to turn the air-con off at the back? 41 00:01:45,421 --> 00:01:47,692 - The air-con is off. - Really? 42 00:02:12,817 --> 00:02:17,817 Subtitles by explosiveskull 43 00:02:18,455 --> 00:02:19,915 Big night, Saturday night. 44 00:02:19,955 --> 00:02:20,895 A lot of people out drinking, 45 00:02:20,935 --> 00:02:24,072 but you guys are out there doing some exemplary police work. 46 00:02:24,583 --> 00:02:27,124 Sevali and Jones apprehended a vandal 47 00:02:27,164 --> 00:02:29,348 caught in the act of defacing public property. 48 00:02:29,636 --> 00:02:32,762 The man was drawing a large penis on a wall. 49 00:02:33,766 --> 00:02:35,825 They managed to confiscate the pen, 50 00:02:35,907 --> 00:02:39,272 and change the drawing into that of a man with a big nose. 51 00:02:40,495 --> 00:02:42,399 Actually, looking at it now, it, uh... 52 00:02:42,524 --> 00:02:44,115 it's not really gender-specific, is it? 53 00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:47,110 They showed initiative, so, uh, well done. 54 00:02:50,062 --> 00:02:51,440 Uh, what else? 55 00:02:51,501 --> 00:02:53,825 Five of the seven pairs of trousers that went 56 00:02:53,897 --> 00:02:56,598 missing from Blackfield Menswear on Lambton Quay 57 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:59,647 were retrieved. Well done, Stevenson and Parker. 58 00:03:02,910 --> 00:03:03,710 Ah, hold on. 59 00:03:04,633 --> 00:03:05,466 Parker. 60 00:03:06,171 --> 00:03:07,886 Those aren't uniform pants, are they? 61 00:03:09,375 --> 00:03:12,969 Oh, um, there must have been a mix-up, sir. 62 00:03:13,009 --> 00:03:14,701 Is that right? Is that right, Parker? 63 00:03:14,873 --> 00:03:16,835 Those are Blackfield Menswear pants, Parker. 64 00:03:17,074 --> 00:03:19,415 They're not standard police issue, are they? 65 00:03:20,551 --> 00:03:22,871 And where is Stevenson today, Parker? 66 00:03:24,506 --> 00:03:26,937 - At home on TradeMe. - Why? 67 00:03:28,399 --> 00:03:29,741 Selling pants. 68 00:03:29,861 --> 00:03:31,833 Right, might have to have a little discussion 69 00:03:31,873 --> 00:03:33,769 about this later in my office, yeah? 70 00:03:33,809 --> 00:03:36,076 - I'll do a report. - Good. 71 00:03:36,297 --> 00:03:39,897 Let's get back out there, guys, and remember to be safe, OK? 72 00:03:40,230 --> 00:03:41,104 Dismissed. 73 00:03:42,368 --> 00:03:44,806 Uh, Minogue, O'Leary. 74 00:03:45,755 --> 00:03:48,105 I want to talk to you guys about your report. 75 00:03:49,565 --> 00:03:52,646 Now, what I'm about to show you is top secret. 76 00:03:53,814 --> 00:03:54,797 Don't look. 77 00:03:59,597 --> 00:04:02,807 I have security access. A special pin number. 78 00:04:06,888 --> 00:04:08,972 - Five. - Hey, don't- Shh. 79 00:04:09,012 --> 00:04:11,834 Hey, Sarge, you should probably have some more digits in your pin. 80 00:04:12,639 --> 00:04:14,534 What, like pin numbers? 81 00:04:14,940 --> 00:04:17,539 Well, like, anyone has a one-in-10 chance of guessing that. 82 00:04:17,711 --> 00:04:21,231 Oh, yeah, of course. There's more numbers involved. 83 00:04:22,421 --> 00:04:24,902 Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. 84 00:04:26,477 --> 00:04:27,319 What is it? 85 00:04:27,804 --> 00:04:30,835 What you're about to see behind this door is classified. 86 00:04:33,183 --> 00:04:36,018 Welcome to the Wellington Police Paranormal Unit. 87 00:04:36,345 --> 00:04:39,730 You are the only two officers to have set foot in this division. 88 00:04:40,385 --> 00:04:42,228 Because of its classified nature? 89 00:04:42,653 --> 00:04:46,915 No, I've invited other officers in here. No one wanted to come in here. 90 00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:51,465 This is where I file anything unusual; 91 00:04:51,505 --> 00:04:55,170 anything, uh, out of the ordinary that defies worldly explanation. 92 00:04:55,245 --> 00:04:57,555 - Do you believe in ghosts? - Not really. 93 00:05:02,122 --> 00:05:05,440 My brother drew that when he was 10. He saw it in our bathroom. 94 00:05:06,732 --> 00:05:08,646 I believe this is a UFO. 95 00:05:09,985 --> 00:05:12,119 Um, I believe that's a hubcap. 96 00:05:12,198 --> 00:05:13,834 Interested in what you think, Minogue. 97 00:05:13,878 --> 00:05:15,459 Yeah, I believe it's a hubcap. 98 00:05:15,499 --> 00:05:17,410 Yeah, well, I don't care what you guys think. 99 00:05:17,450 --> 00:05:20,247 This is the file that pertains to your case. 100 00:05:21,834 --> 00:05:23,812 This is a report from 1951. 101 00:05:25,052 --> 00:05:30,187 'The felon spewed gallons of sulphuric vomit, smelling like eggs or Rotorua.' 102 00:05:32,344 --> 00:05:34,373 This is from 1885. 103 00:05:34,817 --> 00:05:39,252 'The lady spoke with a voice bystanders described as that of a course gentleman. 104 00:05:39,416 --> 00:05:43,598 'She expelled fervent and copious bile. It's odour - that of sulphur.' 105 00:05:44,551 --> 00:05:46,237 Well, that's exactly what happened tonight. 106 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:51,931 Now, the name the assailant gave in each case was Bazual of the Unholy Realm. 107 00:05:52,065 --> 00:05:54,146 - Are you joking with us? - I don't- I don't joke at work. 108 00:05:54,186 --> 00:05:57,665 Outside of work, I have a observational, absurdist sense of humour- 109 00:05:57,705 --> 00:05:59,970 sometimes even a little bit risque. Sorry about that. 110 00:06:00,010 --> 00:06:02,894 Look, I don't give a shit. Are you trying to say that these cases are linked? 111 00:06:02,934 --> 00:06:04,342 In each of the previous cases, 112 00:06:04,382 --> 00:06:09,556 the person claiming to be Bazual performed a human sacrifice - at dawn. 113 00:06:10,611 --> 00:06:13,498 I'm just thinking maybe we'd be better off doing something similar to the pants, 114 00:06:13,584 --> 00:06:15,262 looking for the pants. We could be out there 115 00:06:15,302 --> 00:06:16,726 on the streets, you know, during the daytime. 116 00:06:16,766 --> 00:06:20,116 I'm actually rostered on. It's my turn to get attacked by the police dog. 117 00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:24,340 Get down to that interrogation room, and check out this Bazual character right now. 118 00:06:24,403 --> 00:06:25,171 Yep, OK. 119 00:06:25,211 --> 00:06:28,230 I'm gonna stay here, and, uh, change the pin number. 120 00:06:28,270 --> 00:06:30,090 - Yes, sir. - Dismissed. 121 00:06:56,427 --> 00:06:59,777 Yeah, so, we've just been reassigned to the Wellington Paranormal Unit. 122 00:06:59,895 --> 00:07:01,641 - Um, it's highly classified unit. - Mm. 123 00:07:01,681 --> 00:07:03,770 Um, so, yeah. 124 00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:05,846 It's top secret. No one else knows about it. 125 00:07:05,935 --> 00:07:08,875 Sevali and Jones, they haven't been briefed on it yet. 126 00:07:08,975 --> 00:07:12,221 I mean, to put it in layman's terms, we're kind of like Mulder and Scully. 127 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:15,696 She's like Scully because she's analytical, she's got the brains. 128 00:07:15,815 --> 00:07:18,180 And, uh, I'm a man with brown hair. 129 00:07:19,751 --> 00:07:22,780 Yeah, so, I'm not sure if paranormal phenomena exists- 130 00:07:22,895 --> 00:07:25,905 - It's pronounced phre-mo-mema. - It's phenomena. 131 00:07:26,417 --> 00:07:27,553 Well, it's phre-mo-mema. 132 00:07:27,616 --> 00:07:30,172 It's phenomena - the N. 133 00:07:30,414 --> 00:07:30,982 Phenomena. 134 00:07:31,022 --> 00:07:33,583 Another way that we're like Mulder and Scully is that we've got, 135 00:07:34,055 --> 00:07:36,955 sort of, an underlying sexual tension going on. 136 00:07:38,652 --> 00:07:39,333 Eh? 137 00:07:52,592 --> 00:07:54,032 She doesn't look well. 138 00:07:54,326 --> 00:07:57,271 The dead shall rise from hell. 139 00:07:57,403 --> 00:08:01,109 Do you need a lozenge, or something? 140 00:08:01,656 --> 00:08:05,108 Maybe we could call a- Do you want us to call your parents or a guardian, perhaps? 141 00:08:05,148 --> 00:08:10,215 There will be buckets of blood and a fountain of fire. 142 00:08:10,255 --> 00:08:10,800 Ugh. 143 00:08:11,512 --> 00:08:13,281 'She's scaring me, O'Leary. 144 00:08:13,412 --> 00:08:15,351 - 'Can you do your bad cop?' - 'Mm. Oh yeah.' 145 00:08:18,319 --> 00:08:20,578 Stop that. It's a bit scary. 146 00:08:21,252 --> 00:08:23,141 Yeah. 147 00:08:28,945 --> 00:08:33,387 Hello. My name is Sgt Maaka. I'd like to have a few words with you, if I may. 148 00:08:34,576 --> 00:08:36,776 Can I call my parents? 149 00:08:38,241 --> 00:08:41,792 Uh, she's just got a normal voice. Youse- I thought 150 00:08:41,832 --> 00:08:44,375 you said she had some sort of demonic man's voice. 151 00:08:44,415 --> 00:08:45,415 Yeah, well, she did before. 152 00:08:45,455 --> 00:08:47,111 Can I go home now? 153 00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:49,796 She just sounds like a normal teenage girl. 154 00:08:49,859 --> 00:08:52,690 This is not a case for the Paranormal Unit at all. 155 00:08:53,535 --> 00:08:56,735 I had a whole speech planned and everything. What am I gonna do now? 156 00:08:56,833 --> 00:09:00,613 Um, look, I'm very sorry about this. 157 00:09:00,937 --> 00:09:03,827 I tell you what - we'll contact your parents. They'll come and get you. 158 00:09:04,038 --> 00:09:05,079 Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa! 159 00:09:05,119 --> 00:09:06,326 Let's go! 160 00:09:47,052 --> 00:09:48,215 It's unholy. 161 00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,551 Should we jump after her? 162 00:09:55,935 --> 00:09:59,095 That was pretty insane. I mean, have you seen the likes of that before? 163 00:09:59,225 --> 00:10:00,335 - Have I seen that before? - No. 164 00:10:00,375 --> 00:10:04,543 Have I seen a teenage girl leap through a window, 165 00:10:04,722 --> 00:10:08,520 have light going all over her face and her blowing back in the wind. 166 00:10:08,616 --> 00:10:10,430 No. No, I haven't. 167 00:10:10,535 --> 00:10:11,819 And I tell you what it is. 168 00:10:11,859 --> 00:10:13,899 - It's pretty obvious to me. She- - Drugs. 169 00:10:14,164 --> 00:10:16,065 Oh, I thought robot. 170 00:10:16,290 --> 00:10:19,060 'B-4, this is Comms. Over.' - Go ahead. 171 00:10:19,897 --> 00:10:22,966 'Domestic dispute at 9 Greys Ave. Need you to respond. Over.' 172 00:10:23,328 --> 00:10:26,022 Yeah, that's a negative, Comms. We're on a special mission. Over. 173 00:10:26,081 --> 00:10:27,080 Mm-hm. 174 00:10:27,216 --> 00:10:31,165 'Yeah, the caller has requested Minogue and O'Leary specifically. Over. 175 00:10:31,709 --> 00:10:32,799 On our way. Over. 176 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:36,815 Do we get to turn our lights on for that? 177 00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:39,091 Yeah, definitely. 178 00:10:40,127 --> 00:10:41,904 I might go a bit faster, if that's all right. 179 00:10:41,944 --> 00:10:43,452 Well, we need to. We've gotta get there. Comms just said. 180 00:10:43,492 --> 00:10:44,516 Right-o. 181 00:10:48,620 --> 00:10:50,756 So, were on the way to a domestic incident. 182 00:10:50,796 --> 00:10:51,946 Hopefully it's just an argument, 183 00:10:51,986 --> 00:10:54,455 something that can be resolved quickly, cos we've got, obviously, other things to do. 184 00:10:54,495 --> 00:10:56,162 Potentially bigger fish to fry. 185 00:10:56,831 --> 00:10:57,590 - Good evening. - Hi. 186 00:10:57,630 --> 00:10:59,380 Hi. Officers O'Leary and Minogue. 187 00:10:59,756 --> 00:11:01,154 - Is there any trouble-? - I've locked him in the garage. 188 00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:03,089 OK, we should probably come in and have a look around... 189 00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:03,971 Yeah, come in. 190 00:11:04,011 --> 00:11:04,833 ...if that's OK. 191 00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:06,536 Just watching the rugby, and he starts 192 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:08,670 yelling and carrying on like he's possessed. 193 00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:11,390 It's just the worse midlife crisis you've ever seen. 194 00:11:11,445 --> 00:11:13,988 - Minogue. - 'Oh, matching shirts. 195 00:11:14,028 --> 00:11:15,670 'That's awesome. We could do that.' 196 00:11:15,710 --> 00:11:16,888 We do that every day. 197 00:11:17,092 --> 00:11:18,950 It's not that. Look, it's the same girl. 198 00:11:18,990 --> 00:11:19,636 Ah. 199 00:11:20,270 --> 00:11:22,750 She looks a million times better in the photo, eh, than in person. 200 00:11:22,821 --> 00:11:25,851 - Don't say that in front of the mum. - At one time, he was very normal. 201 00:11:25,891 --> 00:11:27,771 - What is normal? - Well, this isn't. 202 00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:30,770 - Oh gosh! - OK, that's more than a midlife crisis. 203 00:11:30,870 --> 00:11:32,131 Gary, can you get down off the roof? 204 00:11:32,171 --> 00:11:33,080 The cops are here. 205 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:34,751 He's breaking the law of gravity, O'Leary. 206 00:11:34,791 --> 00:11:36,649 How did you get up there, sir? 207 00:11:36,689 --> 00:11:41,130 Minogue and O'Leary, we meet again. 208 00:11:42,826 --> 00:11:44,896 I don't think so, mate. 209 00:11:45,008 --> 00:11:47,270 - Do you know him, O'Leary? - Do you play softball? 210 00:11:47,310 --> 00:11:50,175 I am Bazual. 211 00:11:50,270 --> 00:11:51,717 Bull(BLEEP). His name's Gary. 212 00:11:51,790 --> 00:11:54,825 I am Bazual of the Unholy Realm. 213 00:11:54,932 --> 00:11:56,456 Look, just try and calm yourself, mate. 214 00:11:56,537 --> 00:11:58,179 You should probably come down from there, mate. 215 00:11:58,255 --> 00:12:00,715 He got really angry when our daughter came home late, 216 00:12:00,755 --> 00:12:02,244 and she was in a really bad mood. 217 00:12:02,284 --> 00:12:04,823 I mean, I don't know. Could have been too much screen-time. 218 00:12:05,083 --> 00:12:06,163 Do you want some help? 219 00:12:06,270 --> 00:12:09,545 Oh, no, look, your neck is gonna get really sore, 220 00:12:09,585 --> 00:12:11,905 and I'm not massaging it tonight. 221 00:12:12,255 --> 00:12:14,691 - Have you seen that before? - God, no. 222 00:12:14,761 --> 00:12:17,351 You need to stop that, and you really need to listen to your wife, Gary. 223 00:12:17,391 --> 00:12:20,456 - You're 47! - 47? 224 00:12:27,707 --> 00:12:29,543 Are you all right? Are you feeling a bit better? 225 00:12:29,583 --> 00:12:30,312 Hm. 226 00:12:30,570 --> 00:12:31,770 What am I doing on the fridge? 227 00:12:32,150 --> 00:12:35,684 Yeah, so, the gentleman calmed down. So, we've just let him off with a warning. 228 00:12:36,669 --> 00:12:37,970 A different Bazual. 229 00:12:38,010 --> 00:12:41,030 Our original person of interest was his daughter. 230 00:12:42,939 --> 00:12:44,207 Have calmed down now, as well. 231 00:12:44,247 --> 00:12:45,146 So bit of a win-win. 232 00:12:45,186 --> 00:12:48,013 I mean, so we can go now, uh, knowing that everyone here is safe. 233 00:12:48,053 --> 00:12:49,082 Mm-mm. 234 00:12:50,251 --> 00:12:52,440 Well, so the father and daughter both called themselves 235 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:54,120 - Bazual of the Unholy Realm. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 236 00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,280 - Yeah, he's named after her. - And then they both had super strength. 237 00:12:57,320 --> 00:12:57,851 Weird. 238 00:12:57,891 --> 00:13:00,759 - And talked about fountains of fire. - I think it runs in the family. 239 00:13:02,228 --> 00:13:03,985 Speaking of running in the family... 240 00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:06,513 We're going 50. 241 00:13:09,666 --> 00:13:11,306 She's gone into those bushes. 242 00:13:11,654 --> 00:13:14,454 Pursuing on foot. She's slowing down, O'Leary. 243 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:17,126 In pursuit. I'll follow her. Head her off! Head her off! 244 00:13:20,111 --> 00:13:20,895 Ma'am! 245 00:13:21,794 --> 00:13:24,020 Running from the police is an offence. Stop! 246 00:13:28,317 --> 00:13:29,864 I'm gonna have to scale the fence. 247 00:13:34,092 --> 00:13:36,393 That's all right. Let's get this up here. 248 00:13:36,631 --> 00:13:37,634 Just... Oh. 249 00:13:39,107 --> 00:13:40,788 Just- Once you get your feet in... 250 00:13:41,091 --> 00:13:42,774 Ma'am! Ma'am! 251 00:13:46,378 --> 00:13:47,925 Uhh... 252 00:13:48,531 --> 00:13:50,741 You shouldn't be running in a playground, ma'am! 253 00:13:51,551 --> 00:13:53,341 I've got some questions- Oh! 254 00:13:58,332 --> 00:14:01,863 Ma'am, you shouldn't be running in a playground in those Ugg boots. 255 00:14:03,945 --> 00:14:07,119 'So, I've been in pursuit of a highly acrobatic housewife.' 256 00:14:07,212 --> 00:14:08,038 Ma'am? 257 00:14:08,274 --> 00:14:11,267 'Just come through the children's playground, through the back here, 258 00:14:11,423 --> 00:14:14,794 and she's absolutely vanished. No idea where she could've gone. 259 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:19,028 I'm in two minds about whether I really wanna find her, to be honest. 260 00:14:20,214 --> 00:14:21,021 Hello? 261 00:14:22,804 --> 00:14:24,768 Minogue? 262 00:14:25,135 --> 00:14:26,055 Who said that? 263 00:14:26,139 --> 00:14:28,160 Oh, gidday, boy. 264 00:14:28,373 --> 00:14:29,518 Hello. 265 00:14:29,712 --> 00:14:31,642 Hello, Minogue. 266 00:14:31,927 --> 00:14:33,531 Ew, ew, ew. 267 00:14:33,571 --> 00:14:36,480 Your mother sucks (BLEEP) in hell, Minogue. 268 00:14:36,566 --> 00:14:37,480 You're a bad dog. 269 00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:38,625 The mouth will open. 270 00:14:38,665 --> 00:14:41,240 - The dead will walk the earth. - Stop talking, you freaky little dog. 271 00:14:41,326 --> 00:14:43,878 I am Bazual! I do as I please! 272 00:14:43,918 --> 00:14:45,898 There will be buckets of blood. 273 00:14:45,938 --> 00:14:48,023 A fountain of fire! 274 00:14:48,691 --> 00:14:50,071 Did you guys see that? 275 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,716 That dog was talking, right? 276 00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:55,186 Well, obviously, you do get hurdles in policing, and, um, 277 00:14:55,226 --> 00:14:58,506 these sorts of fences certainly are one of them. You know, it's a real challenge. 278 00:14:58,546 --> 00:15:01,012 I think, certainly, since they've changed the way they make these fences, 279 00:15:01,052 --> 00:15:02,975 it's been a lot harder to get over them cleanly. 280 00:15:03,147 --> 00:15:05,507 It's not something that normally happens to me. 281 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:07,226 To be honest, if anything, Minogue, perhaps, is 282 00:15:07,266 --> 00:15:08,727 a little bit more prone to this kind of thing. 283 00:15:08,821 --> 00:15:10,182 But, like I said, I was just giving it my best 284 00:15:10,222 --> 00:15:13,139 shot and it didn't quite work out on the day. 285 00:15:13,253 --> 00:15:13,941 Yeah. 286 00:15:14,810 --> 00:15:17,135 Minogue, I'm just requesting assistance here. 287 00:15:17,622 --> 00:15:19,702 Caught on a fence again, O'Leary? 288 00:15:20,403 --> 00:15:22,160 Uh, yep. 289 00:15:22,716 --> 00:15:23,594 On my way. 290 00:15:24,398 --> 00:15:25,708 I think I need a hug. 291 00:15:30,159 --> 00:15:31,955 So, a dog spoke to you? 292 00:15:32,110 --> 00:15:33,865 Yes, and it was very rude. 293 00:15:33,950 --> 00:15:35,855 Are you sure it wasn't like one of those internet dogs that sounds 294 00:15:35,938 --> 00:15:37,578 like its talking when it's actually just barking? 295 00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:39,851 - Like a... - No. 296 00:15:39,891 --> 00:15:42,933 Mm-hm. 297 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,124 I'm not an idiot. 298 00:15:44,164 --> 00:15:47,528 Maybe somebody was behind the dog while it was chewing quietly. 299 00:15:48,052 --> 00:15:48,670 No. 300 00:15:48,710 --> 00:15:50,374 It was saying that my mother does sexual stuff 301 00:15:50,414 --> 00:15:52,105 in hell. These guys recorded all of it. 302 00:15:52,567 --> 00:15:54,599 Um, do you mind if we get that footage? 303 00:15:54,639 --> 00:15:57,353 - What, of his mum? - No, of the dog. 304 00:15:58,389 --> 00:16:00,758 - He said his name was Bazual. - Mm. 305 00:16:00,816 --> 00:16:04,119 I've been doing some extensive research on this Bazual. I googled it. 306 00:16:05,587 --> 00:16:06,897 'He who brings hell on Earth.' 307 00:16:06,968 --> 00:16:10,048 Bazual itself is not that great, but I mean, with that definition 308 00:16:10,088 --> 00:16:11,871 it's not gonna top any baby names lists, is it? 309 00:16:11,911 --> 00:16:13,265 I'm surprised it's so popular already. 310 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:16,684 It's not that the girl or the father or the dog have the same name. 311 00:16:16,735 --> 00:16:18,381 It's the same entity. 312 00:16:18,656 --> 00:16:23,349 OK, it transfers from body to body, using them as vessels. 313 00:16:24,343 --> 00:16:25,047 Huh? 314 00:16:25,271 --> 00:16:27,938 So, the two of you picked up the young woman here, 315 00:16:28,034 --> 00:16:30,334 and then brought her to the station which is here. 316 00:16:30,511 --> 00:16:33,292 She escaped and ran to this address here. 317 00:16:33,407 --> 00:16:35,685 It transferred to the father and then to the wife, 318 00:16:35,791 --> 00:16:37,339 who ran to here. 319 00:16:37,506 --> 00:16:39,736 Changed course to here, 320 00:16:39,990 --> 00:16:42,894 and then turned around and then came back to this point here, 321 00:16:43,198 --> 00:16:46,158 where Minogue had the conversation with the dog. 322 00:16:46,859 --> 00:16:49,185 So it's kind of like one those stars you used to draw in primary school. 323 00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:50,199 - Oh, yeah. - Remember those? 324 00:16:50,239 --> 00:16:51,978 All those other lines confused it. 325 00:16:52,018 --> 00:16:53,733 - Well, you mean the map lines? - Mm. Mm. 326 00:16:53,773 --> 00:16:55,091 Sorry, Sarge. Yep. 327 00:16:55,131 --> 00:16:58,446 What it is is a pentagram. It's a symbol of the devil. 328 00:16:58,486 --> 00:16:59,081 Oh. 329 00:16:59,121 --> 00:17:01,481 It's centred right here at Cuba Mall. 330 00:17:03,072 --> 00:17:06,801 In the mid '60s, a group of Satanists based in the Wellington CBD 331 00:17:06,908 --> 00:17:10,206 erected a shrine to hell itself. 332 00:17:10,611 --> 00:17:14,682 That dog kept on saying, 'Buckets of blood. A fountain of fire.' 333 00:17:14,722 --> 00:17:16,608 We're not talking about the dog right now. We're talking about this. 334 00:17:16,648 --> 00:17:18,448 One of Wellington's most iconic monuments. 335 00:17:18,488 --> 00:17:20,369 That's the Cuba St Bucket Fountain. 336 00:17:20,409 --> 00:17:24,450 These 13 buckets represent the 13 chambers of hell. 337 00:17:24,575 --> 00:17:29,356 The fountain itself is a hell mouth - a gateway to and from the underworld. 338 00:17:29,657 --> 00:17:33,048 'The mouth shall open, where dead shall walk the earth.' 339 00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,024 Metallica? 340 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,373 Nah, no, it's that dog. 341 00:17:36,517 --> 00:17:39,407 That dog was saying it. Could that be relevant? 342 00:17:42,376 --> 00:17:44,708 Bazual intends to make a human sacrifice. 343 00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:46,726 If he succeeds, the dead will claw their way 344 00:17:46,766 --> 00:17:48,359 up from hell through this bucket fountain 345 00:17:48,424 --> 00:17:50,544 and walk the streets of the Wellington CBD. 346 00:17:50,674 --> 00:17:53,131 Sarge, I think the bucket just tipped blood. 347 00:17:53,747 --> 00:17:54,773 It's begun. 348 00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,150 What's happening, guys? 349 00:17:58,265 --> 00:18:00,987 We're tryna stop the dead from walking through Cuba St, Parker. 350 00:18:01,208 --> 00:18:02,620 Parker, your pants! 351 00:18:03,472 --> 00:18:06,320 O'Leary reckons there's gonna be blood coming out of the fountain. 352 00:18:06,882 --> 00:18:08,672 Hey, look, it's gonna tip... 353 00:18:09,926 --> 00:18:10,760 now. 354 00:18:12,990 --> 00:18:13,660 Now. 355 00:18:15,247 --> 00:18:16,744 - Now. - No. 356 00:18:17,552 --> 00:18:18,546 - Now. - No. 357 00:18:18,683 --> 00:18:19,675 - Now. - No. 358 00:18:19,715 --> 00:18:20,354 Now. 359 00:18:20,822 --> 00:18:21,826 Oh, dammit. 360 00:18:21,866 --> 00:18:23,403 - Now. - Now. - Nope. 361 00:18:25,096 --> 00:18:26,901 - No, that's horrible. - It is blood. 362 00:18:26,941 --> 00:18:28,361 - It's a sign of the apocalypse. - That's blood. 363 00:18:28,401 --> 00:18:30,357 Minogue, is that the dog you saw? 364 00:18:30,537 --> 00:18:32,392 Minogue. 365 00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:33,701 It's got the same voice. 366 00:18:33,741 --> 00:18:35,957 - Right, let's get it. - No, he called for me. 367 00:18:35,997 --> 00:18:37,285 - Dog's talking. - You're a bad dog! 368 00:18:37,325 --> 00:18:39,469 - Dog's talking. - You're a naughty little dirty-mouth dog. 369 00:18:39,550 --> 00:18:40,990 You stay! 370 00:18:43,913 --> 00:18:44,627 Stay! 371 00:18:46,615 --> 00:18:47,817 I got it, guys. 372 00:18:47,857 --> 00:18:49,782 It's all good, guys. 373 00:18:49,870 --> 00:18:51,746 Tell us what you want, demon. Tell us right now! 374 00:18:51,786 --> 00:18:54,057 - Answer him. - The dead shall walk the earth. 375 00:18:54,097 --> 00:18:55,492 It transferred to that guy! 376 00:18:55,532 --> 00:18:56,977 Requesting assistance. 377 00:18:57,077 --> 00:18:59,367 - Clearance to Taser? - No, no, I'll tase him. I'll tase him. 378 00:18:59,407 --> 00:19:01,551 No, we must perform an exorcism. 379 00:19:02,158 --> 00:19:03,527 Do you-? Do you know how to do that? 380 00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:07,070 An exorcism. 381 00:19:07,341 --> 00:19:10,266 So, what you all need is a crucifix... 382 00:19:10,310 --> 00:19:11,152 Yep, check. 383 00:19:11,207 --> 00:19:12,834 - Holy Bible. - Got it. 384 00:19:12,950 --> 00:19:14,590 - ...and some duct tape. - Duct tape. 385 00:19:14,630 --> 00:19:17,573 Oh, guys. Pretty urgent now, I think. 386 00:19:17,634 --> 00:19:20,185 - You are going to hell, Minogue! - Oh. 387 00:19:20,225 --> 00:19:21,725 'Tell them the power of Christ compels you.' 388 00:19:21,765 --> 00:19:22,486 OK. 389 00:19:23,010 --> 00:19:25,720 The power of Christ compels you! 390 00:19:25,854 --> 00:19:26,997 What next, Sarge? 391 00:19:27,037 --> 00:19:29,989 I-I don't know. It's buffering. Sorry, guys. I'm on prepay. 392 00:19:30,048 --> 00:19:31,539 It sounds like someone burning. It's burning. 393 00:19:31,579 --> 00:19:32,567 Call the fire service! 394 00:19:32,607 --> 00:19:35,488 You are the sacrifice to the Dark Lord! 395 00:19:35,528 --> 00:19:36,325 Why me? 396 00:19:36,365 --> 00:19:38,616 Well, maybe, I mean, they always sacrifice virgins, mate. 397 00:19:38,656 --> 00:19:40,004 - So, are you a virgin? - No! 398 00:19:40,110 --> 00:19:42,310 Sorry, I don't know his sexual- I don't know your sexual history. 399 00:19:42,350 --> 00:19:44,506 I've actually never seen any of his girlfriends. He might actually be a virgin. 400 00:19:44,546 --> 00:19:46,308 O'Leary. 401 00:19:46,348 --> 00:19:47,909 'Make sure you say this three times.' 402 00:19:47,949 --> 00:19:48,972 OK, say it two more times. 403 00:19:49,012 --> 00:19:50,702 The power of Christ compels you. 404 00:19:51,303 --> 00:19:52,448 - That's two. - With more authority. 405 00:19:52,488 --> 00:19:53,745 The power of Christ compels you! 406 00:19:53,785 --> 00:19:57,498 It's working. It's worked. Police. 407 00:19:59,408 --> 00:20:00,928 - We're gonna get you! - Wait, wait, wait, wait. 408 00:20:00,968 --> 00:20:03,356 No, no, no, no. Get off him. Get off him. 409 00:20:03,544 --> 00:20:06,224 That is not Bazual. We banished him to hell, remember? 410 00:20:06,393 --> 00:20:07,785 Oh, that's right. 411 00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:11,221 Yeah, so, we're not entirely sure what happened out here tonight - 412 00:20:11,322 --> 00:20:13,176 whether it was some sort of mass hysteria; 413 00:20:13,310 --> 00:20:15,564 it could have been, you know, some illegal drugs in the water supply. 414 00:20:15,604 --> 00:20:16,310 Mm-hm. 415 00:20:16,350 --> 00:20:19,446 - Or it was paranormal phreno-mema. - Maybe. 416 00:20:19,707 --> 00:20:23,063 Certainly, if you suspect that your friend or colleague or anyone that you know 417 00:20:23,103 --> 00:20:24,980 has been taken over by a demon from hell, 418 00:20:25,070 --> 00:20:27,630 that's the kind of thing you really wanna, you know, call in quickly. 419 00:20:27,670 --> 00:20:29,468 Any time there's gates to hell.. 420 00:20:30,336 --> 00:20:32,456 - Never a good sign. - Give us a call. 421 00:20:33,168 --> 00:20:35,313 What this incident highlighted is the need for 422 00:20:35,353 --> 00:20:37,590 a special unit of the New Zealand Police Force 423 00:20:37,630 --> 00:20:41,397 that deals with the cases which have no worldly explanation. 424 00:20:42,403 --> 00:20:44,087 I was wondering where you got to, Parker. 425 00:20:45,761 --> 00:20:48,995 You're in luck, mate. In about six minutes, I'm off the clock, 426 00:20:49,247 --> 00:20:51,540 and I have a legendary joke for you all. 427 00:20:55,854 --> 00:20:58,854 Well, I haven't actually told it yet. 428 00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:04,458 Subtitles by explosiveskull 33522

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