Original subtitles

BOARDMAN: And a new game starting, five draw.

Five and 10 draw. Get in the game

starting with R.B., J.L., L.B., S.G,

R.M., R.P., G.C., G.W.B.F. And J.B.

Five and 10 draw, get in, the game's starting.

Come right in. Five draw.

MAN: M.V.

BOARDMAN: L.B. Five draw. L.B. L.B. Five and 10 draw. L.B.

Feeling lucky?

CARD DEALER: All right, sir.

Double "T."

BOARDMAN: Hello, Bill.

Put you on at 5?

Put me on at 10.

On at 10.

NARRATOR: Poker has been around for a long time.

CHARLIE: It sure has.

NARRATOR: But it isn't like this anymore.

The saloon has been replaced by this,

with a game that can be played in comfort

and with full confidence in the management.

And here is the man who is responsible for that confidence,

Mr. Murry shepherd.

MURRY: Welcome to the California club,

where your pleasure is our business.

It has been said that nearly everyone in America understands poker

or wants to.

It is one of America's most popular games.

And since you have shown an obvious interest by coming here,

we have prepared a short film to teach you the fundamentals

of the game as we play it here.

Service is our only commodity.

This film is part of that service.

NARRATOR: The object of the game is to win the pot.

Hope I remember that. There are 2 variations of this game,

high draw, where the highest ranking hand wins...

Don't give me that. Mmm-mmm.

Low draw. Ah, there's my baby.

They ought to put this machine in schools.

Where the winning hand holds the lowest possible ranking combination of cards.

As you enter the club, the reservation

and game board is located in the card room.

You must stop here

and tell the boardman of your game preference.

He will enter your initials on the board

and you will be called and directed to a table by a floorman.

The floorman puts the games together,

interprets and applies the rules of poker.

His decisions are final.

BOARDMAN: C.W. 10 blind. C.W. In the coffee shop.

C.W. 10 blind.

C.W. Double his money.

NARRATOR: The management of the club

has no financial interest in any game.

There is no house deal.

Each player plays for himself.

And each, in turn, acts as a dealer.

When you are seated at the game,

you'll be asked to pay a rental fee,

which will be collected thereafter

at the beginning of each half hour.

BOARDMAN: B.D. 10 blind. B.D. 10, 20 low.

NARRATOR: You must have a full buy-in

when you are seated to begin playing.

Chips must be purchased from the chip girl.

The buy-in is determined

by the limit of the game you choose to play.

You must ante before you receive cards.

The ante is placed on the number directly in front of you.

The number is also your seat number at the table.

MAN: What do you do, Lew?

I'll call.

NARRATOR: Acquiring the knowledge and skill

to play card games such as poker

is a social asset.

To make the most of this asset,

it is simply good judgment to be wanted at the card table.

Oh, shit.

Don't be a spoilsport now.

MIRIAM: $20 to you. $20 to me.

Who's the bettor? MIRIAM: Me.

Well, you're so pretty, I'm going to fold.

MIRIAM: Is everybody out?

CHARLIE: That's it.

MIRIAM: You mean I've got a goddamn six and everybody's out?

NARRATOR: This depends even more on good manners

than upon the skill of the player.

The following principle should increase

one's popularity as a card player.

Pat! I need one little, teensy...

NARRATOR: Sit erect.

Maintain a quiet bearing.

MIRIAM: Come on, get on with it.

Oh, come on, sweetheart.

NARRATOR: Avoid nervous habits.

Forty dollars.

BOARDMAN: Hey, Miss I have seat for you now. Come on in.

NARRATOR: During the game, avoid conversation

regarding matters not relating to the game.

I'll just have to call you.

NARRATOR: An appearance of awkwardness and clumsiness

I didn't think you were that good.

...gives a bad impression of one's ability to play.

Hey, wait a minute.

Wait, what do you think you're doin'?

What do you mean, "wait a minute"? You said it was good, didn't you?

No, no, no, I said that I didn't think

that you were that good. I got a seven-four.

NARRATOR: When a hand has just gone very well for you,

don't talk about it.

The film you've just been viewing

cannot instantly make you a good poker player.

The more skilled you become,

the more pleasurable you will find the game.

MAN: I had a feeling you'd make the...

WOMAN: Next year.

Raise.

Pass.

I call.

Well, I've got to raise the raise.

Goodbye.

I'm out. Out.

And one more time to you.

What a pot.

Another $20, huh?

The table is so slow.

MAN: You wanted one of these. Go ahead, I call.

Cards?

Pat.

Pat. Very interesting. Very interesting.

MIRIAM: Come on.

Do you mind picking the cards up

and dealing them the regular way?

You did stay pat? You are pat?

You are pat?

MIRIAM: Come on. Wait a second, lady.

I got a big decision to make here.

I'm gonna let you break me down.

I'll let you break me down. 2 cards.

Two beauts. That's very nice.

Oh, my! MAN: Oh, great catch. Great catch!

Hey, hey, pal, that card's dead.

What are you talking about?

The card went off the table. It's a dead card.

You're absolutely right, chief.

My gratitude for your knowledge of the rules,

except the card never left the table.

LEW: The card went off the table, it's a dead card.

MIRIAM: Oh, come on.

Did you see that card go off the table?

I didn't see nothing at all.

It's stupid of me to ask you.

What about you? Did you see it?

All I see is the time passing.

Pop, did you see it? Nothing.

How much you bet?

Somebody must have seen it. Kenny, this is ridiculous.

I want to change my table. Whoa! What's the problem?

The problem is the card went off the table

and hit the floor, and he won't give it up.

There's nothing to give up.

The card never hit the floor. I caught it before it did.

All right, take it easy. Who else saw it?

Ma'am, did you see what happened?

I didn't see it. How about you, sir?

I saw a card bounce. I don't know what happened back here.

You dealt the hand. You ought to know what happened.

I dealt the second one a little hard.

It never hit the floor, not even close.

Not even close?

All right, that settles it, Lew.

The rule is if the card doesn't hit the floor, it plays. Continue the hand.

Come on. Miriam, I don't have another table.

You got your ruling. Play!

Just take it easy. Take it easy. It's not even close.

20-20.

Twenty-twenty. The flying card didn't stop you from betting, huh?

20-20. How about 40? I raise.

Raise.

What could be cozier than this?

I mean, this is perfection, isn't it? You and me in this hand...

Oh, that's pretty. Just do something!

How much money you got? How much you got left?

Seventeen. Oh, not enough for the maximum bet. Three shy.

I bet you $17.

Call. Seven smooth.

No good. I got a six perfect.

Sorry about...

Damn it. That last card that went off the table was a joker.

That's why you wouldn't give it up.

You are ridiculous.

You said it wasn't even close.

That's yesterday's news.

You two are working together.

You're partners. You two motherfucking creeps are partners.

MIRIAM: All right! Stop with the language.

They should put a muzzle on him. That's it, huh?

That man is absolutely ridiculous.

KENNY: What's going on here?

What's going on with you guys?

These two are working partners together.

I never saw that man before in my life.

LEW: I saw him throw the joker out on the last deal.

The man is totally out of line.

They've been smiling at each other all night.

CHARLIE: Oh, come on, will you?

MAN: Sit down and settle down.

Get control. Come on.

All right.

All right, now who else saw this?

WOMAN: I didn't see it. I didn't see it.

What about you? What do you want me to say?

KENNY: The man calls you a cheater.

The man doesn't know how to play poker.

The man is bad. He's a complete asshole.

We all know that, right?

The man goes broke, he can't handle it.

The man is on tilt. You want to hear anymore?

Not me.

Come on, now. You'd better just take it easy, sport,

'cause the security's liable to let you go!

Put that guy in a horror show, huh?

KENNY: That's it! Any more fighting,

and you guys go out of here for good, all right?

LEW: All right!

Miriam, what do you say?

I say I can do without any more of that language.

Right.

KENNY: You think there's any cheating going on?

MIRIAM: I wouldn't like to say about that.

They've been consistent winners,

and I'm a big loser. And you know I know how to play poker.

Oh, sour grapes, honey. Sour grapes.

All right, all right, let's get it back to normal.

Lousy punk.

You're not that good.

Oh, up yours.

Sir, would you like another beer?

MAN 1: I bet it on notre dame

'cause I got a feeling notre dame was gonna pull it off.

MAN 2: They beat U.C.L.A. Before

when they had so many games going straight.

Yeah, it's kind of similar to, to the Miami dolphins...

WOMAN: This particular game is duck soup...

They won 17 games straight last year...

WOMAN: Oh, come on.

I can beat that goddamn miserable game.

Don't make me beg for a stinking $30.

I'm sorry.

You know, your attitude just pisses me off sometimes, button-nose.

Don't call me that.

Oh, now look. There you go again.

Mama, I'm not doing anything.

Three, four, five, six, seven...

I need about $80 to get to the track.

Not bad.

MAN: Frankly, Emilia,

I don't know why you're so impatient.

What's wrong with Mitch?

Sir, can I help you?

Cold beer. Keg draft.

I'm buyin' that man sittin' over there a beer.

Turned out to be a drinkin' man, huh?

Nothing personal, but I, I already got a beer. Thanks.

Great.

MAN 1: So, you think the, the Knicks are gonna win?

MAN 2: Yeah.

CHARLIE: No, Knicks ain't goin' to win nothin'.

Willis is hurtin'. The Knicks ain't winnin' nothin'.

Celtics this year.

You follow pro basketball?

Yeah.

Anything, right? BILL: Whatever's going.

Yeah, me too. Action.

WOMAN: Are you gonna give me the $30 or not?

Well, I gotta buy this man a drink.

Will you have a beer? I will definitely have a beer.

Give my friend here a beer.

Don't take the glasses. Leave everyone here just the way they are.

Yes, sir!

Oh, will I love to play poker with those,

red-necked fish, you know who think they nicked the Greeks.

Love to get them steamed. Easy to beat. Suckers.

Oh, yes!

GIRL: Go on, mama. WOMAN: Okay.

CHARLIE: A dollar says you don't know who Glenn Riggs is.

Uh, what's your name?

Vince. The name's Vince.

Glenn Riggs was the announcer for Hop Harrigan.

What do you want $30 for?

I don't need $30. I need it for that girl I got in the bathroom.

I'm only the relief bartender. I don't go in the cash register.

Where's jack? What is this? Jack went to a funeral.

Look, I've been working here for one year, right?

Just give me a piece of paper, a chit.

"Thirty dollars, Renee." okay?

If I give you $30, and I come up short, it'll be your ass.

Baby, you were born short. And it's always my ass.

BOTH: Captain midnight!

Yeah, bong, bong! This guy giving you trouble?

Bong!

He ain't who he's supposed to be. It's not the regular man.

Thirty dollars.

I wouldn't sign anything.

Don't sign a thing. Don't sign anything.

What did you get her to sign?

Here, mother.

Thanks, baby. You won't be sorry.

Don't worry now. I can beat it.

Goodbye, mother.

$20 says you can't name the seven dwarfs.

Okay.

I know I can name three or four of them.

But, now, you got to be able to... Seven.

I got seven. Doc.

That's one.

Dopey. That's two.

Uh...

Snoopy. There is no Snoopy.

There ain't no Snoopy. I know there's Doc,

there's Dopey, there's Grumpy, there's, uh...

You don't have $20 here.

Wait a second. I got $20 right here.

I need a little help here. What about...

Here comes seven like a gatling gun.

Okay. Seven dwarfs, I'm ready.

Sleepy, Grumpy, Doc.

That's four. That's three.

Oh, I'm with you.

Okay, wait a second. Now, there's Sleepy, Grumpy, Doc.

Sleepy, Grumpy, Dopey.

Dopey. We got Dumbo.

There's no Dumbo. Dumbo wasn't in that cast?

No Dumbo.

Gotcha. Dumbo.

Dumbo flew. Well, we both lose, huh?

Dumbo flew. Remember when Dumbo flew?

They set that little house on fire.

I've seen an elephant walk,

BOTH: But I never seen an elephant fly.

My god. I know.

That Dumbo flew. I know.

A lot of black folks said that was bad news, you know,

seeing a black crow sing about

a big flying elephant. What's that?

It's taboo. No black crows.

¶ Judgment day, oh, you know, I know

¶ When we go

¶ Laila gonna throw it

¶ Amy goin' home ¶

¶ Aristis, arastis, Johnson Brown

¶ What you gonna do when the rent come 'round? ¶

You in the park?

No, no, I don't got a car. I just live, uh... Not far.

I like to live close to the action, you know, William?

You don't got a car, I'll give you a lift.

You're going to give me a lift? That's a good idea.

¶ You know I know the rent means dough

¶ Landlord gonna throw us in the cold cold snow

¶ Aroostis, arastis, Johnson Brown

¶ Da, da, da

¶ What you gonna do when the rent comes round?

¶ Aroostis, arastis, Johnson brown

¶ What you gonna do when the rent comes round?

¶ What you gonna say? How you gonna pay?

William, you're a minstrel, huh?

¶ Judgement day ¶

Oh, man, I hate key stuff.

The keys, the keys. There it is.

That's just great.

Please, muzzle him.

Look in his side pocket.

He's got my goddamn money somewhere.

Right, here it is.

You got it?

Yeah.

I hope you loved that, funny man.

Okay, folks, will you just relax and follow me, please?

Follow me, please.

The stuff wasn't even that good.

Wow!

What is this, a hospital or a jail?

What's goin' on?

This is, uh, William. This is Barbara.

She's gettin' us out of here.

BILL: Thanks a lot.

CHARLIE: You ever been in jail in New York?

BARBARA: Yeah.

They give you powdered eggs.

Powdered, shitty...

The shittiest food in the world.

Have you... You haven't been in jail.

BILL: What are you doing?

Oh, just trying some of the hot one.

It really works. Here, you want to try some?

Come on, the heat makes it feel good.

Listen to me, I got experience being kicked.

Yeah, easy, easy.

Just don't touch it with the can. Easy now.

Easy, easy. Okay, okay.

Not bad, huh? That's nice.

Oh, oh. Easy, easy.

That's okay.

Last year, year and a half,

you know, I must have hit

about 30 different racetracks in every little town and city I've been to.

Yeah, how'd you do?

Oh, tapioca time. El busto.

CHARLIE: I'll give you a great ace in the hole.

Mmm-hmm.

If you find yourself busted in a small little town...

Say, is there anything I should know about this?

Well...

Listen, fellas, it's breakfast time.

We got lucky charms and...

What's with this? Froot loops.

Froot loops? Have some waffles in a little style...

I'll take some coffee. Blueberry pancakes.

You'd still be in jail if that guy had given me that $50.

But...chicken.

...a strange town you head straight down to the ice cream people

and pick yourself up an ice cream cart.

They got a million of them.

They don't care who you are or what you look like.

Something to eat. It's roughage.

Believe me, nothing.

Desperate people.

They give you a funny little white jacket, and you're on your way.

How much do you make in a thing like that?

Well, you could pick up a snappy $25 in less than an hour.

Yeah, how do you do that? Well, you keep it all.

You don't think I'm talkin' about workin' this job legit, do you, William?

Your favorite lucky charms.

Hey, baby, can I have a beer, honey?

You want a cold beer? No. No, thanks.

It goes good with your froot loops.

Get some milk, honey. Get some milk

BARBARA: Got it.

That shaving cream's not going to stain

your white sweater. Don't worry.

Nobody's going to tell your mother.

Just put it down, and it'll all wash out.

Mmm-mmm, let me taste it for you.

What is this?

Oh, that crap.

Come on, we got company.

I tried to make it look nice.

That looks better. Yeah, these girls knew.

Yeah. Here. Here, baby.

Oh!

One time, right, I had this job

selling ad space in a labor union magazine.

Non-existent. Just get on the telephone, call people and say,

"hey, do you want to buy some space?"

Help yourself. This ain't bad. Just last night's.

No, no, I just need the spoon.

A little pate de fois garbage.

Then you get to keep 45 percent of, uh, what you pick up.

BARBARA: How come you don't get to keep all of it

if it's non-existent?

I'm not pickin' nothin' up. I'm just talkin' on the phone.

Yeah, right.

What do you do?

Huh?

What do you do for a living?

I'm with a magazine.

You a writer?

Yeah. Say!

CHARLIE: Do you remember the first bet you ever made

on a sport event?

BILL: Do you?

I bet a nickel. 1945 world series.

The cubs and tigers.

Don't laugh. I lost. Susan's home.

5-cent bet and I lost. I didn't expect to lose.

Susan, honey. I didn't have the nickel, right?

So this guy Mikey asked my mother.

Honey.

Honey.

CHARLIE: I've been trying to beat it ever since.

What is it?

Did he hurt your feelings?

No.

You can scratch him off the book, honey.

I don't want to scratch him off my book.

Here's the baby of the house now.

Sweetheart, would you like some froot loops?

No.

Come on, come on.

Therapy.

SUSAN: No therapy.

¶ La-da-da-da-da-da-da

¶ Di-da-da-da-da ¶

CHARLIE: What's shakin' baby?

SUSAN: I just want to go to bed.

CHARLIE: Oh!

BARBARA: Take your coat off, sweetheart.

Oh, come on, now, you're startin' to get

that Halloween look on your face.

It was just... He was really different.

Guy wasn't out of line with you, was he?

No. We had such a good time.

Yeah? Guy was fresh, was he?

You know what he did? He gave me $50.

That was the deal, wasn't it?

No, the deal was for $30.

Well, he liked you a lot, too, sweetheart.

How come you were picked up?

Drunk and disorderly.

Yeah, well, you know, Charlie's not too good with cops.

Well, he certainly lets them know it.

This is the truth. You're an animal lover, right?

Yeah.

Okay, well, the great blue whale, right?

You know about a great blue whale?

Like that wrestling guy, huh?

No, it's a big fish. The big fish.

There's only about 2 or 3 left in the world.

And the truth, the tongue of the great blue whale

weighs more than a full-grown African elephant.

No, it's not true.

You don't believe it?

You're just makin' it up to make me feel better.

'cause you don't like to see me cry.

You feel a little better?

Yeah, I do.

Good.

Hey, who's that guy out there?

Billy? He's a poker friend. You want to meet him?

No.

He'd spent his rent money on us.

Yeah, so we brought him home.

The girl's fine. She just fell in love again.

That baby's been with us ever since.

Listen, William, I'm goin' to crash.

You can use the sofa if you want.

Thank you.

Thanks, Charlie.

Listen, I got to crash, too.

Okay.

Good night, baby. Good night.

I got to get my car.

I can't get my car.

There's nobody up there.

Hi.

I was just lookin' for the guide.

Go back to sleep.

It's Happy, Bashful, Dopey, Doc, Grumpy...

Fuck 'em.

BARBARA: Aha, good afternoon, Mr. Denny.

Hello, Barbara.

Ah, this information came in for you from chino this morning.

Thank you, Barbara. The dauphin in yet?

Since 9 a.m. He wanted to see you.

Thank you.

What's the matter with your body?

I had a little automobile trouble, Barbara.

Is that him?

Oh, it was, sir.

Did you tell him I wanted to see him?

I did, sir.

What'd he say? He said, "thank you."

He did? He did.

Thank you.

You're most welcome.

BARNEY: If you want 6 pages...

Oh, Bill.

Oh, Barbara. Ouch.

These are the colors on the antique article.

Oh, right.

I, uh, didn't know what time you'd be in, so I just picked out a few.

I, I think they're your best bet.

Thanks, Barbara.

You okay?

Oh, I'm fine.

Good. How about some coffee?

Love some.

Everybody's named Barbara.

Hello?

BILL: Barbara? Yes.

This is Bill Denny.

Oh, bill! Hi.

Is the ice cream man around?

He sure is.

Charlie, it's Bill.

William, what's shakin'?

Hey, Charlie.

Well, I'm, ahem

I'm at the office. I'm reviewing things.

Yeah, it sounds like a bore.

You want to track it with me?

Believe me, I'd like to. Only I cannot get out.

I'm, I'm really all jammed up here.

Listen, you let a man rub some hot shaving cream on your ribs,

you can take a shot with him at the track.

Well, listen, I know you're right, but you know,

I, I cannot steal any more time from here.

CHARLIE: Okay, we'll play it your way,

but if you should change your mind

I'll be at the bar in the grandstand

right above the finish line, near the $100 window, all right?

Yeah, I know the spot.

Okay, listen. Uh, if I can, I can.

Okay, I hope you do.

Well, listen Charlie, thanks for an interesting evening.

And knock 'em dead.

Okay, I will.

Okay, so long.

WOMAN 1: It's different.

It's not my favorite, but it is different.

WOMAN 2: Who in their right mind would put a graveyard

on the front of a California...

Our boss, our boss.

I mean, that's not going to sell any magazines.

Well, it's not doing so badly.

Excuse me. Could you... Could we change seats?

No way, lady. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry about that,

but the last time I sat facing the rear, I never won a race.

I get sick if I ride that way. It gets me dizzy.

Hey, Miss, this lady here is going to throw up

if she sits in this chair.

Would you mind changing with her?

I never change seats. It's bad luck.

She'll never change seats.

Lady, I don't mind changing.

This lady here will change with you.

Thank you. Great.

This lady will change with that lady, but she needs a window seat.

So, if you change there, and I could...

Everything okay? Wonderful.

Great.

Oops!

Okay.

Super day for the track.

Do me a favor?

Do you want to change seats again?

No. Would you see what Egyptian femme looks like?

She's in the 4th.

Egyptian femme, huh? Femme.

MAN: Jerry Weintraub is their manager,

and he's got to have something.

Just stock, publicity stills, you know...

BARBARA: What do you want, some 8 x 10s?

Yeah. Uh...

Egyptian femme.

The horse has run twice in two years, right?

And each time she stiffed out. Now, she steps up in class,

goes up against colts, draws an inside post position in a sprint

and ain't got no speed of her own to get out there.

Is all that in there?

If you know how to read these things.

It says a lot more.

I thought I'd spare you all the gory stuff.

Egyptian femme.

The lady's going to cap out on Egyptian femme, huh?

Pretty funny. Forget that horse, lady.

I hate to see her get away.

She owes me money from last year.

Oh, yeah. Well, then you make a bet on her,

and she'll owe you money from this year.

Barney.

Yeah.

How far is it to Chino?

An hour and a half.

I'm goin' up there. They got it all wrong.

BARNEY: Okay.

If you hear from the dauphin,

tell him, uh, tell him, tell him, tell him,

tell him, what you like.

BEN: Well, I'm holdin' my own.

Oh, yeah? Yeah.

Just don't bet the chalk. No chalk bettin' here.

Later, Ben. All right.

The weight factor, see? It's the weight factor.

Excuse me.

MAN: Hey, Charlie. CHARLIE: Hey, babe, what's happening?

How's it going? How'd you do the first race?

Well, not too good.

Oh, I like to stay away from the daily doubles, too. Got any info?

No, not as yet.

If you get any information, I'll be at the bar.

Andrew, que pasa?

Hey, big Charlie, what's going on?

CHARLIE: You got a winner today?

MAN: Not yet. Yeah, me neither.

Are you sure Egyptian femme is not going to win this race?

Honey, you want a beer?

No, I don't. I'll tell ya,

I think you ought to bet your change on Egyptian femme.

You're right. Yeah?

Then why do you have four underlined?

Oh, I don't know. I used to like the, uh, banks,

the jockey, but I changed my mind.

You're putting me on. Who you gonna bet, lady?

Not Egyptian femme, I'll tell you that much.

I'm glad you're definite.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: ...for M. Cabal. Mr. M. Cabal...

Who do you like in the fourth, pal?

Mmm, William, you made it. You made it, William. What's up man? Sorry, sorry.

They're comin' in very heavy. I know.

Glad to see you, William. How you feelin'?

Not bad, not bad. I got a little pain here and here,

otherwise, couldn't be better.

Hey Andy, Give my friend here a beer.

Hey, Andy, want to give my friend here a beer?

Give my friend here a beer, will you? I asked first.

I'm telling you another half inch to the left of center...

That's no good here, Charlie.

This is on me. No, this is on me.

It's on me. You just keep it all. Really? All right.

Any time. You keep it al.

Your money's no good here, pal.

Appreciate a man who likes to get you the goodies.

That man gave me a kick right where I'm breathing,

and I'm pretty lucky to be here.

Now, how did you manage it?

Manage what? How'd you get away from work?

I wish I was as good at this

as I am at getting away from work. Gave them a little footwork.

Razzle-dazzle. A lot of razzle-dazzle.

The minstrel man strikes again.

I know, I know.

Well, William, after today you're gonna have enough money

to open up a string of parking lots.

It looks that good, huh?

Twenty-to-one in the morning line ain't tin, baby, ain't tin.

You really like it? Fucking gold, babe.

Who's the horse?

Numero uno. Numero uno.

Egyptian femme. Tough to figure, right?

He doesn't seem to like to run a lot.

She, she, she, it's a lady. Right.

That is beautiful. Right. Been shopping for a big price.

The horse's been getting stiff. Today, we're gonna nail them.

Not much to recommend, Charlie.

The rest are a bunch of dogs, too, right?

Believe me, she's gonna pay you $4 million and change.

If you think the post, the inside post position is bad,

she's got a lot of speed, wire to wire.

You're really not worried, are you?

This horse owes me and owes my friend, owes everybody around here.

We're taking down today, my friend.

I'd like to toast that, pal. I'd like to toast that.

Let's go see a man about a horse.

A man about a horse.

RACE COMMENTATOR: Egyptian femme is pulling to the front.

Excuse us.

Excuse me. Where is she?

Come on, Egyptian femme! Come on.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A SYSTEM: Egyptian femme has recovered...

Don't stop! Don't stop! Go!

Come on, Egyptian femme! Come on, stay up there! Stay up there!

Come on, Valdez! Stay up there!

Come on Valdez! Who's Valdez?

Valdez is the jockey! Come on, Valdez.

CHARLIE: Come on, Valdez. Keep it up there.

Come on, Egyptian femme!

He'll make a move now.

Come on, Egyptian femme! Stay up there!

Come on, Valdez! Come on, Valdez!

Come on, Valdez!

Come on! Egyptian femme!

Come on! Come on! Come on!

And he wins!

We, we win!

Take it down. Let's get to the windows and beat the crowds.

Come on, we win this race.

We won!

We won that race goin' away.

That was a race. Did you see that race?

I mean, Valdez... That race was fantastic.

We didn't even see the tote board. Tote board!

Did you see the other horse? We win this race.

I've never done this. I've never come out...

Will you trust me? We won.

Let's see the photo, man.

Photo finish? We won goin' away. What race were you watchin'?

I was watching this race.

Just a little razzle-dazzle. Oh, yeah.

Can you be happy now? I've never done this before.

The horse wins. We're a winner right now.

The horse did not win! Nobody says that.

This is called counting your chickens.

Chickens and counting chickens?

Before they're hatched.

BILL: You spend a whole life out here

and, and, and you have a twenty-to-one shot...

Come on, fellows. Will you get it up here?

I'm telling you, we win the race. What is it? What is it?

Goddamn one horse.

One? Yeah, one.

Egyptian femme! Egyptian femme won! We won!

Where've you been? That's what I've been saying.

I can't believe this!

I had that horse!

We're not staying for the next auction?

That's where my man!

You rotten creep!

Hey, you!

You said Egyptian femme had no chance!

The horse won!

Whose money is that?

Had no chance?

BILL: Hey, lady, don't throw oranges.

The horse had no chance?

The horse had no chance? You knew it all along!

Are you crazy?

Goddamn it, lady, you don't throw oranges on an escalator!

Come on, lady, get back! How's that, lady?

That's my hat!

Now, you stop throwing oranges. Stop it!

Give me my goddamn hat!

Stop it!

You thief! You want your purse?

That horse owes me more money!

Here, you want your money? Take your goddamn...

You asshole, you can't even throw!

Wonder where he's going to take us for dinner tonight?

Who knows?

But wherever it is, it'll be delicious.

I hope it's the Scala. Yeah, that'd be great.

We can have all that Italian food we love.

We can have mozzarella marinara

And eggplant parmigiana... Honey, there he is.

Zabaglione for dessert.

Now sit down, act natural.

Say, what is this?

¶ Happy birthday to you

¶ Happy birthday to you

It's not my birthday.

¶ Happy birthday dear Barbara

¶ Happy birthday

¶ To you ¶

CHARLIE: Surprise!

BARBARA: Honey, no, it's not.

Hey, hey, baby.

We're goin' to make it. Here you are, Mr. Tenor, and thank you.

Oh, that was delightful. Birthday greetings!

Ho, ho, ho!

Go on.

Who's that wonderful guy out there?

That man's a tenor. We want you to have the big evening...

We can't have the big evening tonight.

She and I got a date.

What are you talking about? You're not working tonight?

BARBARA: Yes, we are.

I saw you eating your breakfast.

Now, I think I'm going to play the piano.

Which way is it?

Honey, sweetheart, it's a very important party.

It's very, very important...

¶ Dance around

¶ What you gonna do when the rent comes round?

¶ What you gonna say? How you gonna pay?

¶ Judgment day

¶ Oh, you know, I know ¶

BARBARA: Okay, that's it. That's it now.

All right, stop it now.

All right. All right. Stop the music. Stop.

We're expecting Mr. Kramer.

We loved all the gifts. We love everything.

Are we out of here?

CHARLIE: Yeah.

...should've been there when you came to the door.

But it's $150 apiece, apiece for the evening for dinner.

What?

This evening at $150 each.

Are we out of here?

One hundred and fifty each. All we have to do is go to dinner.

Maybe Mr. Kramer wants to give Bill and me $75 apiece.

Bill's awful pretty to show off.

I don't know how to take that.

Not at all. We can tell him we're sick.

BILL: Now I get the feeling

I'm being mugged by my friend.

No, no, this is not right.

All right, Bill, out the door.

I'm waiting to say goodbye.

You ladies, now, I mean, we're gonna...

It sure was nice.

Go in there.

Sit down and act natural.

I think you're unfair.

Susan and Barbara must not be deprived of our companionship tonight.

BILL: Certainly not.

They were lookin' super.

Should we look inside?

Absolutely.

Mr. Kramer must be some funny dude.

Hi.

It's me. Do you remember me?

Of course I remember you.

Is there anyone else here?

Honey, no, there's just us.

Are you sure? Positive.

Okay.

Hi.

Oh, hi, hi.

Sweetheart, you look terrific.

Do you like it? Yeah.

You smell wonderful.

Oh, thank you. I'm so glad you like it.

What are you wearing? Thank you.

What are you...

Ah, it's Joy, isn't it?

No, no, it's Shalimar.

Shalimar.

Do you like it? BARBARA: Oh, god.

Mr. Chan! Mr. Chan!

Shalimar is my favorite perfume.

Oh, it's one of mine, too. Do you like the dress, huh?

I had it... Oops, yes, I had it made in Omaha.

Yeah, but I just, well...

I just never had the balls to wear it, you know, outside.

Well, honey, it's sexy... I love the dress.

HELEN: Listen to me. Dignified.

Elegant. It is. It's elegant.

Listen, tonight we're gonna go to Chasen's.

Chasen's tonight.

And then I've got a great big surprise.

What is it?

After chasen's, what?

I don't know if I should tell you. Tell us. A little hint.

Tell, please. Go ahead.

It has something to do with music.

Music. You know?

Listen, before we go, let's have a cocktail.

I made us some daiquiris. How about it?

Thank you. I'll get you yours.

Thanks.

You're my best friends.

Really?

Thank you, Helen.

Yeah, now you want to give this to Helen.

Honey, don't drink it. Give it to Helen.

It's just taking forever. What is that?

I might have to take the top off.

Okay, give this one to Helen.

Shake it up a bit.

That's for Helen, now. That's good.

HELEN: Oh, thank you.

Here.

Hurry, Barbara, I want to make a toast.

Okay. Great.

To Helen and her new look. To Helen.

Yes, you look great.

Elegant. Yes, elegant.

Thank you. Thank you.

Wonderful.

Who's that? Wait a minute. Are you expecting anyone?

No. Are you sure?

I'm positive. And don't worry, honey, I can take care of it.

Don't worry.

She can take care of it. I hope so.

Really, she can take care of it. She takes care of everything.

She does, really. I'll take care of you.

Okay, ladies, vice. We're vice.

Vice?

CHARLIE: Detective Waters and this is detective Denny.

Which one of you girls is Barbara Miller?

Barbara, you didn't say...

The young one must be Susan Peters.

You damn cops just can't come in here...

Be quiet, and don't call us damn cops. What's your name, honey?

Brown. Brown, huh?

Yes, sir.

First name? Helen.

Helen Gurley Brown?

HELEN: No, no, sir.

CHARLIE: What's going... Hey, come on now.

It's not a laughing matter, girls.

Close the door, will you?

The door. Close the door.

And check the premises for any marijuana or pot or firearms.

I'm gonna check.

I do not like the feel of this.

You can't search this house without...

You just be quiet, lady.

We'll run you downtown. You feel like being frisked?

No, no.

You can't frisk an old woman, a sweet old woman...

Yeah, well.

Shalimar? HELEN: Yes, sir.

Smells good. Thank you.

You got a cold? Yes, sir.

Oh, yeah.

Here's a sourball.

No, thank you. It's good for your throat.

No, I don't even want this drink.

CHARLIE: Take a sourball. Got one for me?

Yeah, I got one for you.

You seem like a more responsible, older woman than these girls.

Are you misleading these young girls?

No, I'm not. She's just a friend.

They're not friends.

They're not? What are you doing here?

I'm a friend of their aunt's. Don't talk like that. You just shut up.

I think we ought to take them downtown and book them.

Run them right downtown. Let's take them in.

Charlie, let me have a word with you.

Now, you just girls stay right there. You just be quiet.

They're not friends of mine. I'm a friend of their aunt's.

What do you think, pal?

I think the one in the middle looks dangerous.

Her mouth turns down...

BILL: I know. I don't trust her.

I think we ought to take her down and book her.

Well, how about we book the two on the end

and let the one in the middle go?

Oh, yeah, you're feeling sorry for her, huh?

I think so.

I'll make an exception. You're sure?

Helen, Helen, stand back and look at me when I talk to you.

Sorry.

You look like a very well-dressed woman.

I am.

Good background. Well-educated.

That's right.

Religious.

My partner here and I think we are gonna believe

that you had nothing to do

with what's goin' on, on the premises and that...

I'm just a friend. Believe me.

But we do feel that you should vacate the premises immediately.

Bless you. Bye, Helen.

CHARLIE: Take care of your cold, sweetheart.

BILL: Shut the door, Helen.

SUSAN: Bye.

You people ought to be arrested. Jesus Christ!

I can't believe you did that. What was that?

I love your brown shawl.

Okay, now, let's get...

You're not really a policeman, are you?

Oh, no. Do you think, if I was a cop, I would arrest you?

People, now, how does Mexican food sound to you?

Mexican food. Oh, that sounds delicious.

Do we have time to change our clothes?

Get out of your work clothes and get into something comfortable.

Don't take too much time or we're gonna get Helen and take her.

Oh, excuse me.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: And here we go.

You're crazy. It's a bet. It's a bet.

The black guy over there. What's his name?

The black guy? The black guy?

Take him out with a good punch.

Come on, baby.

CHARLIE: Boy, do we got Morgan.

Place your bet. You wanna place your bet.

What do you want to bet? What do you want to bet?

Forty and sixty. Forty and sixty.

I bet you even your man don't stop my man.

You got it. Even money.

CHARLIE: Come on Morgan!

Come on, sit down, lady, sit down.

Come on, Roy.

We got the first round now. You got the money they're floatin' you, right?

Fifteen. 15 on Collins.

Yeah. Okay. Collins is a wonderful guy.

Got good marks in school.

I know him.

He just don't fight too good, though.

He ought to be playing baseball or somethin'.

Want another $15 on this?

No, no, I got one bet left. I'm gonna bet for your hat, man.

I wanna win your hat. My man's gonna win this fight.

MAN: You want my hat? My bell helmet hat?

Yeah, right. Give it to him.

Here, you got it. $10. Right.

For your shirt.

Get in there!

Keep working!

Whoo!

Get in there!

I think that we won all 3 rounds.

After 3 rounds, the official decision of the judges...

Here you go.

Thanks a lot. I'll take the hat now.

You've seen sugar ray knock out foreman.

Come on, people. Thank you very much.

Come on, let's get out of here now.

Okay, you lay me 10-to-five.

I got suit, you got lumberjack.

BILL: You gotta be nuts.

CHARLIE: Why, lumberjack has got to be two-to-one over a suit, anytime.

BILL: Okay. They both can't fight. Hey, come on.

CHARLIE: Get out of here!

$1580

¶ We're all winning

Winning all over the place now.

¶ The moon is shining high ¶

Definitely, we're gonna have to take care of you girls

to make up for that silly old man.

But we're gonna make up for Mr. Helen Girley.

BILL: What's on the agenda?

Right now, we're off to, uh, the Latin quarter now.

Now, Latin quarter. We'll go dancing.

We'll go, uh, anywhere you say now.

I mean, you and me are knocking them dead with this $1,580.

MAN: Stick 'em up.

BILL: I'm sorry I hit your nose.

Put her in the car, man. Put her in the car, man. Stick 'em up, man.

I don't believe it. It's hard to believe. Wait a second.

Put the money on the table.

I can hardly believe this right now.

I'll blow your fuckin' face off.

Then you'll believe it.

Will you do what he tells you?

I don't believe this. Relax. I'll blow your fuckin' head off.

Wait a second. You're not blowin' nothin' off.

I don't believe it. Two nights in a row, right.

We're gettin' robbed two nights in a row.

Put the money on the table, man.

Do what he tells you. Please, Charlie.

Wait a second now.

CHARLIE: Okay, here's $780, man. That's it.

You got half and we're takin' half.

Now, take the money and run. Go ahead, $780, man.

Don't think about it. Take the money and go.

Get out of here, you fuckin' bum!

Get out of here, man!

¶ This town is full of boys

¶ Who think they're mighty wise

¶ Just because they know

¶ A thing or two

¶ You meet them night and day

¶ Strollin' up and down broadway

¶ Tellin' all the wonders

¶ They can do

CHARLIE: Cut our winnings in half.

¶ There are conmen and there's roosters

¶ There's card men and crap shooters

¶ They congregate around the metro bowl

I call. I call.

¶ They wear flashy ties and collars

¶ And the way they get their dollars

¶ They all have got an ace

¶ Stuck in the hole ¶

Take your hand off my knee, will you?

I dropped a card.

You're not allowed to do that.

Your hand is dead. I can't help it, I dropped it.

Well, then your hand is dead.

Hand's dead.

WOMAN: Come on, let's go.

What do you want?

She was aces full.

What did you have, four of what?

Hey, let her play her own cards.

Come on, girls.

This ain't Santa Anita. You're playin' poker.

You girls are sure gettin' good cards, huh?

You girls friends from way back, you two?

No, we don't even know each other.

I've never seen her before.

I don't care how old you are.

Right in the choppers, lady.

WOMAN: Come on. Be nice, will you?

The lowest you can get.

I fold. I will raise you.

I call.

WOMAN 1: I don't want you to see it.

All right, let's ante up.

All right. WOMAN 2: All right, everybody in.

WOMAN 3: That's right. Why don't you go home...

¶ Thought their name

¶ Would be mud

¶ Like a palm playin'

¶ Stud

¶ If they

¶ Lost

¶ That old east town in

¶ The fold ¶

You're burying me here. Get a chinaman in this game.

WOMAN 1: We're falling apart. WOMAN 2: I fold.

SPARK ON PHONE: Man, I, I don't even understand

what you were tryin' to tell me.

You figure you're entitled to a free shot...

I, I never said I was entitled to a free...

Then what are we talkin' about?

When have I never paid you your money, Spark?

Layin' the old thug routine on you?

It's not the question of not paying.

It's when you do not pay me on time, and time is the thing.

You know, week to week, I pay you...

I understand that, Spark. Why do you do that stuff?

Okay, okay. You've owed me for 9 months.

All right, I did, I did. Let's make a deal.

Tell him you're sendin' him some green stamps.

Barbara, how many times have I told you

I do not wish to be interrupted when I'm in conference with Mr. Waters?

Listen to me. You told me four times.

Get out of here, will you, Barbara. He wants to see you now.

Tell him he's talkin' to a thug.

Tell him he'll get his legs broke.

I'll tell him his legs are broken, that's why he can't see him.

Here is the deal, 10 days. You don't cut me off for 10 days,

and you got your money in your hands.

That's it. That's my word.

SPARK: Okay, let me, let me tell you my situation. All right?

You wanna hear that? You care?

Okay, spark. Yeah, I do care.

I am getting buried at this point.

I mean, it's been a very, very bad day.

I understand that, Spark.

I cannot carry you for more than that 10 days.

10 days, that's it.

I mean, if it's 11 days...

No 11 days. It cannot be.

Right. No stories, nothing. 10 days.

What if you lose more money?

Even if I should lose more money.

You're gonna be able to handle that? Right.

Tell him to get preparation h. Do him good. Will you give me a break?

You're going to get it? No stories? I've got it.

I just didn't wanna tap the source,

I didn't want to do it that way, but I'm gonna.

What do you want?

What are the Lakers?

5 and a half. 5 and a half.

Okay, Spark, I'll call you back.

Five and a half to make you laugh. William, you bet your house on this game,

lay the five and a half, you get out tonight.

I don't know, Charlie. I know.

If I had an estate in the country

I would lay it and tap out on the Lakers.

They're coverin' tonight.

This game scares me, Charlie. No, no, don't be frightened.

Now Mr. West, Mr. Goodrich, Mr. Cook's forum, tonight,

they blow the suns out.

Where do you get your confidence?

The Lakers have been playing crappy, and the Suns are hot.

Oh, come on. So the Lakers lose two in a row.

Four in a row.

Right. And, believe me, it doesn't matter. Phoenix wins two or three in a row.

Five. Five in a row? Playing pretty good.

That's what I'm trying to tell you. No, no, don't matter.

This is the double reverse. You lay the five and a half,

and you bet your house on it.

You've been saying this for three weeks.

I'm lucky I'm not much of a property owner.

SUSAN: Hey, Barbara, I really like these red Christmas bulbs.

You think next year we should do the whole Christmas tree in them?

BARBARA: Don't you think that's a bit on the nose?

BILL: How you been? Hi. How are you?

Fine. Fine.

I was just driving by, thought I'd say hello.

Good, good. What are you all doing?

Cleaning out the car. SUSAN: Putting up Christmas lights.

Charlie up yet?

No. Yeah. Up and gone.

Oh, yeah? Where'd he go?

I don't know. He got up so early, I couldn't believe it.

Listen, come on in for some coffee.

No, I can't. Thanks.

Just one cup of coffee.

I'll take a rain check.

All right. Bye, bill. BILL: Nice seeing you.

Hey, Harvey! Bill.

How are you? Bill Denny. What are you doing here?

Well, I checked at the other store, and they said you might be over here.

Wait a minute. Don't tell me why you came.

I'm getting a flash.

You see, I have a good amount of E.S.P. I'm blessed with it.

My wife kids me about it, but she respects it when I get these flashes.

Let me see how close I can get to what's going on here. I get...

I get that you're probably back with your old lady,

and that you want to paint your garage door,

perhaps even the whole front of your house.

Yes, I'm getting the color.

It's a greenish color. Right?

How close did I get?

I need a loan, Harvey.

A loan? Yeah.

WOMAN: How are you?

Terrific.

What's your name? Larry.

Larry, I know you're going in here to win a bundle.

Why don't you come and see me when you come out?

He would like to see Nugie, please.

Okay, come on in.

Hello.

Hi. How are you?

Just go on in through the kitchen. They're in the other room.

Nugie, there's a guy here.

NUGIE: Yeah, yeah.

Howdy. Howdy, Nugie.

Trouble finding the place? No, no, it's fine.

There's some crap in the kitchen if you want...

No, no. I'm fine. I'm fine.

Grab a chair.

Three, six, nine.

What've you got? Jack, five, seven.

I don't know who you know here. This is Bill.

Hi.

Four, five, six.

What're you doing? You're gonna play chess. I call.

Six card low ball.

Forced to bet the first high card.

Three dollars the third and fourth card. Six dollars...

Come on, let's keep the game moving.

Three. Bet him, Nugie.

Terrific.

True love never runs smooth.

I bet three dollars.

Force the bet to $30.

PLAYER 1: I raise it three dollars.

First high card. Three dollars the third and fourth card. Fifth card six. $12.

PLAYER 2: No check and raise. Check and raise.

Three dollars to you, he raised you.

What's the buy-in?

Two hundred dollars buy-in. Help the man.

PLAYER 3: Three dollars.

PLAYER 4: I don't know. No problem.

PLAYER 5: Very nice.

NUGIE: Feel free, man.

Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, anytime.

They get me, man. Don't worry.

Next week, you'll beat their brains in.

There you go. Would you like to see a menu?

No.

WAITRESS: Hi, Sparkie.

How are you, honey?

Right over here.

Whoa, hiya, baby.

What happened to your leg?

Numbness.

Don't play ball after 15 years, lemme tell you that.

I didn't know you played ball.

Actually, I did, you know. With the pirates.

You're kidding.

No, nothing important.

No, I don't want the menu.

Give me the real hot chili. All right? Sure.

Sangria? All right.

You want some chili? No, I'm fine.

They got great zucchini in here. You want that?

Class-a boy? No.

I had a shot for, uh...

Well, it wasn't a shot, it was just, you know...

What do you make my figure?

As your carry-over I got you down

for $2,200. It's a tough week, babe.

No, that's okay. I'll tell you, uh,

this guy, Lloyd Harris, who's the honcho where I work,

he had a very good Christmas season.

What he's created is a slush fund...

You're not telling me a story now, are you?

I don't know what you mean. Come on, man,

I mean, I carried you one year. Am I right?

Yeah.

Was there any pressure put on you at all?

No, you were very nice.

Forget nice. I don't give a fuck about nice.

You know that that year...

Please, just forget about this.

Now, the point is, this is totally different.

It's strictly on a cash basis. I told you that.

Right, right.

Did I tell you that I got hurt in two busts, that my parents were out here,

that I'm getting killed all over the fucking place?

I mean, I told you this up front.

Did I not tell you that?

I'm asking you a question. Did I not tell you that?

Okay, I beat you.

Ten days later you come to me, and you don't have any money.

You're out of line already, babe, but I extend that.

I mean, I extended it to you.

You told me you gonna have the cash.

You got things going. I don't know what you're saying to me.

But you're gonna have the money, you have a way to get the money.

I mean, did you not say that?

What you're trying to tell me is, come payoff day,

you don't have dollar one, plus you owe me more.

Man, I've heard it before.

You don't have dollar one, do you?

Spark...

You gotta think I'm some stupid schmuck you're dealing with.

I got to tell you something, pal.

In my line of thinking, you took a total, out-and-out shot at me...

Look, spark, that's not it at all. Well, what is it then?

Listen to me.

I got $700 for you tomorrow.

Why didn't you say that in the beginning?

Why didn't you say it?

Because you didn't give me a chance.

What about the other $1,500? One week.

I'll tell you, boy...

WAITRESS: What's wrong, Sparkie? Don't you want your chili?

What's wrong?

Nothing's wrong. What?

Want some chili? No.

WOMAN: Hey, sport, you wanna fill this up?

You're Sergio something?

You gonna fill this up or not? Thanks.

Righto.

You know Jenny Carr?

Coming.

She's shacking up with my old man.

He gave me this watch for Christmas.

I don't ever take it off. Ain't it pretty?

You can even wear it in the tub with you.

BARTENDER: What are you having? Cognac?

I don't believe these guys fucking around the way they do.

Gum? WOMAN: I'd never do things like that.

Nobody's eating gum today.

Hey, you, where'd you get that t-shirt?

Playing softball.

What position do you play?

Any position.

Oh, yeah? I like shortstop myself.

I got this neat dog.

It's all fluffy and darling. Did you hear me?

I hear you. You got a dog.

What the fuck am I doing in this dump, anyway?

You should've seen the place where I was last night.

It was really classy.

Any chance you could go back there?

No, classy places don't open this early.

The only trouble with my dog is he shits on the floor

and I don't know what to do about it. What do you do about it?

You know?

You try cleaning it up?

Yeah, I tried that. It didn't do any good.

He just sits there and looks at me.

Just some dumb fuck like all the men around here.

Bunch of faggots. I bet they can't even get it up.

Oh, shit. What am I doing here?

Fuck you, faggot!

BARTENDER: You want some more nuts?

Is that you, Barbara?

It's Bill.

Come in.

Come in?

Yeah, the door's unlocked. Come in. Right.

Hi. Hi.

Barbara not here?

She's out on a date.

What are you doing?

Reading my book.

I don't like to stay in my room at night when no one's here.

We're going to Hawaii tomorrow for two weeks.

Yeah? Yeah, we're really excited about it, too.

I'll bet.

Charlie never did come back.

Do you know what happened to him?

No.

Do you want to come in and sit down?

Yeah, okay.

You're married, aren't you?

Well, what, what difference does it make?

It doesn't make any difference.

We're separated.

Yeah?

Who are you going to Hawaii with? Who's taking you to Hawaii?

Just a couple of guys. These friends of Barbara's.

I don't even know them.

You don't even know them? Uh-uh.

Suppose you don't like them?

Those are the chances you have to take.

You wanna make love to me? Right now?

That has crossed my mind.

It has? Yeah.

This sounds silly, but I don't have any money.

That's okay.

Yeah? Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I really like you.

I mean, it's...

It's different.

It's different? Mmm-hmm.

Why is it different?

Well, I mean, I, I really like you.

I really, really like you a lot.

You brought me that dog.

Took me to the fights.

It was like a real date.

I think I'm gonna kiss you. Yeah.

Hey, isn't this Barbara's room?

She doesn't care.

Having trouble?

Mmm, not anymore.

It's okay, I'll do it.

I got it. I got it.

Open it.

What's the matter? Nothing.

You're taking so long.

You didn't unzip it all the way.

You can't take my foot off with the boot.

No, no, no.

You gotta unzip it first.

Okay.

You're kind of clumsy.

I can get it. Do you want me to do it?

I can do it.

I'll do it. It's all right. It's all right.

I'll do it.

BARBARA: Hi.

Hi, Barbara.

What you doing?

We're going to use your bed, okay?

Great. I just have to find my T.V. Guide.

I think it's under the bed.

I think it's under here.

Shit, I can't tell you what a crappy evening I had.

Son of a bitch almost threw up all over me.

Damn guy.

Well, he already paid me, so I guess it's, you know... How was your evening?

Great. Having a good time.

Good. One of us is lucking out.

There it is. Got it.

SUSAN: Here, I got it. Oh, good. Got it.

What the...

Where did he go? He's gone.

Oh, darling. Come on.

Come on, sweetheart. That's a girl.

That's a girl. There.

He didn't really like me.

Of course he did.

No, he didn't.

Not really.

Honey, think about tomorrow.

I met the guy you're going with tonight.

Yeah?

Yeah.

What's he look like?

Well, he's dark,

he has a... He has a five o' clock shadow.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Is he young?

Yes.

And good-looking?

Yes, he is.

Yes, he is.

Do you really think I'm going to like him?

I think you'll love him.

Really?

Okay.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: ...over here at high post, to Meyers, open at 15, hits.

David Meyers, 92-65. Clay up the middle...

Yeah?

...shumate getting it out of backcourt himself,

dribbles all the way, blocked by drollinger...

Who is it?

MAN: Does a William Denny live here?

Who is it?

You William Denny?

Who wants to know?

Yeah, well, open the door, and we'll talk.

Who are you?

Friend of Spark.

Oh, listen, I checked with Spark,

and we're straight. So what's the problem?

I'm straight with spark.

Why don't you check with Spark and then check back?

Where the hell have you been?

Three guesses. I'll give you this much, my hat is a very big clue.

You son of a bitch! Why didn't you tell me you were going?

It was a spur of the minute thing, William.

I had this incredible dream, right?

I'm in Tijuana at the dog track.

And I sweep the card. Every dog I bet on, William,

wins like a champ. What do you know about dogs?

But whatever I'm feeling, William, winner, winner.

Fantastic. Taking down the cash.

Why didn't you tell me? Maybe I would've liked to go with you!

You don't know what it's been like.

So I get to Tijuana, right? El sweepo.

I don't win one fucking race.

Maybe, if I'd been there, you would have.

You weren't in the dream, William.

My parrot was in the dream.

It was a hell of a handicap.

He said, "bet number four. Polly want a four."

He doesn't eat nothing, doesn't dirty nothing.

It's going to be all right. I just need the typewriter.

What have I got? What have I got?

Packing it all up and moving to Europe to paint, huh?

Yeah. I'm going to Reno.

William, I think they've changed the rules.

You can't bet your typewriter.

Cash. You know, cash.

Well, a guy told me they got 40-80 low-ball stud game,

and a man can win a lot of money.

Sounds interesting. But why Reno?

Vegas figures to have the same kind of game, and it's closer.

Fine, fine. You go to Vegas, I'll go to Reno.

Reno. Sounds like you might have

a nice shot in a game like that

if you have enough money behind you.

No shot, I'm going to win.

Oh, I don't know, William. I don't know.

I do.

Reno, that game. Sounds like a tough game, tough action, William,

with a lot of these lumberjacks

going up there. Cowboys, rich guys.

Tough action, William. It's a tough game.

Nobody's asking you to play, pal.

What's with you?

I don't like you coming in here with all your pessimistic shit.

Pessimistic shit. Yeah, pessimistic shit.

I don't know what's bugging you...

I know how I feel. Let's see... Yeah, how do you feel?

Pal, I'm going to win!

Yeah? So win! Who the fuck is stopping you?

Go ahead and win.

Stop interfering. I don't interfere with you.

Who's interfering with you? I ain't interfering with you.

Look, I know how I feel.

I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Is that clear? Because I know how I feel.

Baby, I'm gonna win.

I believe you.

William, did I ever show you my one-armed piccolo player?

The man is a classic. The man is world-renowned.

William, you got to check this out.

William, for me. For me.

You got to check this out, William.

The man is, is known all over the world.

Now listen. Just watch me.

When I reach my crescendo. For me.

You got to give me a little hand.

A little applause, William. Okay? right?

Okay.

Ladies and gentlemen, your beloved,

world-renowned, one-armed piccolo player.

The hand, now. A little applause. Come on.

Thank you very much.

You need a partner? What?

A partner? A partner? Yeah, yeah. I think so.

I think so.

You going to take it away now?

I'm going to stab myself, William.

MAN 1: Get on him.

MAN 2: Good shot. Good shot.

Fourteen all.

MAN 3: Come on, come on, they're killing us.

MAN 1: Too quick for the old people.

I got him. CHARLIE: All right, guys. 14 up.

MAN 1: He doesn't know what he's doing.

Way off. Way off.

Free throws.

Free throws. Get it up.

Oh, shit.

MAN 4: Rebound.

Yours, yours.

CLERK: Hi.

BILL: Hi.

You got a lot of merchandise.

Yeah, and I want a lot of money.

Here you go.

Are you selling it or making a loan?

Which is going to give me more money?

If you sell it outright. I'm selling it.

MAN 1: Move faster.

Here we go.

That's game.

Nice shot.

You jerk.

Way to work on the old man.

Come on. Careful, old man.

The man beat you by 20 points.

I'll tell you what. Do I need a handicap?

I'll play any one of you dudes one on one

for whatever you got in your pockets.

For real money? Real money, right.

For real dollars. For real dollars?

I don't see no Walt Frazier or Jerry West here.

You're going to lose your money.

That's what I'm here to do, is to lose.

You choose one. Get your money together.

Don't go anywhere, man. Stay right there.

I'm standing right under the hoop.

Fine with me.

You got some money? I got $10.

I got it. What have you got?

You got the money? I got it.

MAN 1: You know, this is stupid. I can't believe this sucker.

MAN 2: I got $10.

What've you got?

MAN 3: Got $30.

I got $10. That's $40.

MAN 4: I've got $5.

$49. That's $49.

Look at him, pulling up his socks.

You got some money, old man?

What you guys get together? We got $49.

You been returning your deposits?

That's right.

$49? You got $1? I got $50, half a $100 here.

Okay, here's the game. You're holding, right?

Who am I playing? You got me, buddy.

I got the shooter? Yeah.

Okay. Hit or Miss for the ball.

I got the ball. What is it, 11 hoops?

That's all right. Eleven hoops?

Come on. 11 hoops.

All right.

¶ Softie

¶ I'm just like putty in the hands

Don't worry about it. Come on.

¶ Like you

MAN 1: Come on, Russ.

¶ And you're an old meanie

Now beat him. Good.

¶ Not a big boobie

¶ I just go nutty in the hands

¶ Of a boy like you

¶ Yeah

¶ You're an old smoothie

Was that five?

¶ And I'm an old softie

¶ I just go nutty in the hands ¶

¶ Of a boy like you ¶

Come on, man. What do you think you're doing?

SALESMAN: I tell you, the Blue Book gives $2,400.

Well, I can't give you $2,400.

What do you mean?

Well, you know, with this gas shortage,

more people are buying little motorcycles

and bicycles than they are cars.

I just, If I had a buyer for you.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: The result is official.

Oh no, man, I got to sell it today.

Well, I tell you, I just can't do it today.

I can't do the... I'll give you $2,200.

$2,200? That's the best you can do?

Final offer. Let's go.

Follow me.

Hey, my man! What's happening?

Any big winners?

You like anything in the sixth?

I'm getting buried here. How you doing?

Nothing, huh?

Yeah, okay. Well, you just save your winnings.

I'll see you later. All right.

MAN: All right.

BARTENDER: Let me see your driver's license, kid.

LEW: Sports tie, next time put some booze in it.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: Trainer Ralph Cripes,

trainer Ralph Cripes, please report to the jockey's room immediately.

Trainer Ralph Cripes, please report to the jockey's room immediately.

CHARLIE: Hey, Andy.

You know that guy with the mustache?

The big guy who was just standing here?

The guy talking about watery drinks?

Yeah, you know him? He's a creep.

Yeah? Get me a beer, will you?

You got it.

MAN: That's a little style player.

ANNOUNCER ON P.A. SYSTEM: Ladies and gentlemen, in the ninth race,

a jockey change.

Number three, fearless Fred, will be ridden by jockey Rick Carey.

Number 3 will be ridden by Rick Carey.

MAN: Whoa, hey, easy there.

Hey, light touch, where's my drink?

I left a drink here. Where is it?

All right, forget it. Give me straight scotch. Straight.

You can't fool around with that.

Take them home again, mama.

Thank you, sir.

That'll be one dollar, sir.

Hmm.

And you got it. There's one dollar for you, my man.

Thank you.

BARTENDER: A friend of yours?

CHARLIE: My cousin.

The horses are at the gate

Hey!

Watch where you're going, you little bastard.

Stupid little bastard.

Oh, handsome, I must talk to you.

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god!

What a punch.

Stupid clown.

What the fuck...

It's the greatest punch I've ever been hit with.

You busted it clean, right?

Oh, beautiful, man. That is the...

You blow my mind. Kick me in the nuts,

you break my nose, rob my money.

You gotta be kidding.

Get out of my way, or I'm gonna kill you.

Where're you going? I mean, I wouldn't lie to you, that is...

Get the hell out of here!

It wasn't as good as yours, but I'll live with it.

Enough, man. That's enough.

Oh, no, no, no. You're a man who knows that ain't enough.

Do you wanna level your own goods?

Nose, ribs, cash.

I ain't such a funny man, huh?

Looks like I hit me a round robin.

You creep,

you stick a little toilet paper in your nose, it stops the bleeding.

You better call an ambulance.

The man lost the last race. He tried to kill himself. Lunatic.

¶ Well, I might take a plane, might take a train

¶ If I have to walk, I'm gonna get there just the same

¶ I'm going to Kansas city

¶ Here I come ¶

$1,800.

$1,123.

You have $1,800. okay, here's $1,100,

you put in $1,100, and then we're partners.

We're definitely partners.

I mean, we're total partners.

I'm putting in $1,800, you're putting in 1,100, 'cause I'm not going to lose.

I'm gonna win. That's the last time you've heard the word "lose."

Love to hear it.

Exactly. The door opened the other way and hit me right on the nose.

It's an omen.

The snow is an omen and the toilet door is an omen.

Absolutely.

CHARLIE: Hello, Reno. Sun's coming out.

This rain could have been snow, William.

Very, very good... Good vibes. Good vibes.

Good sign. Oh, yeah. Feels good.

Red carpets on the street, right?

¶ You must have been a beautiful baby

¶ You must have been a beautiful child ¶

Men in orange suits.

Where else but in the U.S.A., right?

But we got to stop off here and play a little slot machines.

Just a little bit, right?

No, dude. We go straight to the game, huh?

Gotcha.

Boy, you're walking fast, man.

Good. Keep it going.

Gotta give you a little smile every now and then.

I won't break your concentration.

Concentration?

This must be the place, William.

Is it this way? What did they say?

You ask the guy over here.

Which way is the poker room?

CASHIER: To your left.

Charlie, please, come here a minute.

Stop wasting time.

Look, I'm not superstitious,

but touch Dumbo's trunk before we start to play.

For me, right? Ever see an elephant fly?

A little rub.

Okay. Oh, yes.

We're all together.

Keno?

Keno, keno, keno. We got to touch a little keno, too.

Who knows, we might get the $25,000 jackpot.

CHARLIE: This is it?

I think this must be the place.

I don't know if these are past winners or losers.

DEALER: Deuce and a pair.

PLAYER: 10?

Ten. 10.

CHARLIE: William, I think it's heaven.

Hi, fellas. What can I do you for?

Um,

I'll have some J&B scotch straight,

with some soda water on the side.

William, have a drink. It'll loosen you up.

No, I'll have some coffee. Some coffee.

Coffee's right over there, honey.

William, you are a straight dude.

Coffee. Just keep it together.

Don't get in the way of the concentration.

Ace, you're the boss.

CHARLIE: It's a sweet game, it is. $2,000 buy-in, right?

You fellas here to, uh, drink or play?

Well, my partner here is the player and I guess I'm the drinker.

Hughie?

Player.

Next up.

You're low.

Let's run 'em down. Let's start with the bald guy with the mustache.

The tightest player there. Absolutely right.

Percentage player, doesn't take many chances, right?

No flair. The guy, I say, is part of a two or three man combination.

No sweat, but if you find him after the fourth card,

you're not in the hand unless you've got the nuts.

Unless I got the nuts. Right.

Oh, cowboy. Lyndon Johnson is definitely his hero.

I figure he owns a piece of the town.

Haberdasher. Looks like he sells cowboy hats.

He's got the rhythm of the game.

It's his rhythm, absolutely right,

but with your natural ability and your strength,

you don't have to let him have much... Keep talking, keep talking.

The kid? He's seen The Cincinnati Kid too many times.

He's been trying to beat this game

from before he was born, right?

I got him. On to specs.

He's a doctor, and he's been here

playing this game forever, right?

He'd rather lose a patient than a hand.

Very good.

Not much of a problem, he don't want to get involved too much.

Red coat.

Red coat. My call is small-time booster, right?

That's your chair, right? One-time buy-in.

He used to be a cha-cha dancer.

I don't know, but that guy is falling out,

and that's where you're gonna be sitting.

Empty chair.

Who could tell? Bit of luck.

Very tall stack of chips.

A little impressive, but, I dunno, unless

it's Claude Rains in The Invisible Man

and you see your chips a-floating up away from you,

you know the game is too tough for us

and we go on and we hit something else, right? Try it and see.

How about bright eyes?

Oh, well,

that man sitting there?

Deep drawl, Mississippi, best in the game.

The best in the game. I figure he learned to play in the Ku Klux Klan

with a big sheet over his head. Tough man.

What's the chinaman's story?

The chinaman. What can I say?

Looks like he's an oriental prince.

His father probably made a fortune

selling frozen egg rolls, right?

When he starts talking, when he starts yapping,

you know he's cracking...

I gotta have a drink.

Give me a double scotch, will you?

I'm beginning to feel the pressure.

You did very well. You want cognac in your coffee?

He's a fucking Hawaiian, man. Right, right.

Keep passing. okay, he goes once more.

I'm all in.

He's all in for $70.

There goes the chair. It's the one we picked.

Goodbye, Mr. Cha-cha.

I got a straight flush going to the deuce.

Eight and seven. Six high.

Doc is the winner. You win it all, doc.

Too tough for me, gentlemen.

Sorry to see you go.

PLAYER: So long. Seat open.

CHARLIE: You're on, baby.

And a new player.

$2,000 buy-in.

Purples are $100, reds are $20 and the yellows are five.

CHARLIE: He's supposed to be playing, right?

He's a dynamite poker player.

Is he? Dynamite.

He needs to be dynamite in that company.

BARTENDER: These guys are very tough.

I'm Bob Hood.

How are you? Bill Denny.

Good to see you, Bill.

CHARLIE: Any major moves in the game?

Any big winners or losers?

BARTENDER: Nothing much yet.

They only just got started yesterday.

Hey, Slim. What can I do for you?

When do you get a break?

Couple of hours.

You got time, do something for me.

Sure. Anything for you, Slim.

In the, uh, second race down at Santa Anita there's a horse running,

and I need to make a little bet on it.

Right.

What's the horse's name, Slim?

Ole blue out of chute number two.

Ole blue? Ole blue

out of chute number two.

No. Second horse in the 2nd race at Santa Anita.

That's reliable information?

Yes, sir. The second at Santa Anita?

Yes, sir. Great, thanks.

I'll put a little taste on that myself.

Good, good.

You don't wanna risk it in that poker game?

I'm playing right now.

You're playing right now?

That's me, that good-looking fella in the brown coat.

Good luck to you. I, I won't play hard at you.

Let me know about the horse. Will do, Slim.

Is that guy for real?

BARTENDER: Somebody told me a funny story about him.

That guy usually have that much money on him?

Oh, yeah, he's got a roll.

That's the most money I ever saw.

Mellow roll.

Oh, I hope William takes it away from him.

¶ Oh, look down, look down

¶ That lonesome road

Okay.

¶ Before you travel on

¶ Yeah, look up, look up

¶ And seek your maker

¶ Before Gabriel blows his horn

I got a good one. You're gonna like this.

¶ Oh, look down, look down, look down, your fly is open ¶

No, it's not that.

Well, whatever. You didn't like that?

I'm out. Excuse me.

BARTENDER: And suddenly I banged into this...

You got a glass of ice water?

Too hot for you in there, huh?

William, you make a little... Up a bit.

I can't settle down with you here.

What are you saying? You gotta go.

No. No, I can't, I'm sittin' here.

I'm not in the action. I got to watch.

You'll let me watch, right? I gotta watch.

You're not telling me that I'm getting

in the way of your concentration, are you?

You telling me I'm interfering with your game, right?

Oh, god. Okay, well, then you got to lay $200 on me.

Give me $100, $50.

Give me $25

so I can play, get into some...

Ice.

PIANO PLAYER: ¶ Your nobody

¶ Until somebody

¶ Loves you

¶ Your nobody until somebody cares

DEALER: Do you want in?

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I want in.

PLAYER 1: Okay, he comes back.

We're not going to fight, now. Put your coat back on.

PLAYER 1: Now you mean business. I feel like playing awhile.

Let's accelerate it a little. Come on.

What are we here for?

CHARLIE: How do you do?

CASHIER: Fine. How are you? Oh, I'm very well. I'd like, um...

I'd like $1,000 worth of credit.

I have no account, what do I have to do?

You gotta loan on the house?

Uh, yeah, well, I don't... What do you have to do?

I'll tell you. Then you just give me a roll of nickels,

and I'll just kibbitz for awhile

'cause I ain't getting no credit here.

Doctor just calls. 40 to you.

Are you raising?

I got a cherry. I got two cherries.

Hello.

Excuse me. Some...

I got two cherries and nothing happened.

Pit boss?

Let me have a pit boss. Is there a pit boss?

DOCTOR: You know, I wouldn't do that. I'm here to win, Doctor.

Okay. No hard feelings.

No hard feelings at all.

A pleasure to do business with you.

Pleasure doing business with people who like to do business.

MAN 1: Not many do.

MAN 2: You don't think there'll be five?

MAN 3: I'll say that there will be five. I'll bet you even.

Coca-cola, please.

Yes, sir.

Oh. Well, uh,

I feel like a winner, but I know I look like a loser.

We busted? We got anything left?

What's happened in that game?

We're up $11,000.

$11,000.

We are up $11,000.

Well, let us pack this place in.

Let's go back to L.A. Now.

You're my hero. My new hero.

$11,000. We're rich. $5,500 each.

Let's go. Know how long we can live at the track for that?

I can beat the game for 15...

Famous last words. 15, 20.

You're here now, right? You won $11,000.

We could be at the track for 50 years

with that kind of money, right?

Charlie, I got the heat.

Okay, then you gotta give me a couple hundred, so I can play some roulette

or do something while you're in there.

Don't look at me like that.

You're not going... $50?

The man's having a good time.

I'm sitting here going... Wait a second now.

Okay, knock 'em dead, William.

What are you doing?

60 cents for the coke. Wait a second.

He hardly even drank the coke.

That's my keno money.

One time I made 14 parlays and let it ride.

And every time I'd do it in the bootleg days, I'd take a drink.

And I finally ended up with an old dealer around here who said,

"doctor, you don't know what you had.

"You had that house, had the whole point

"from old Felix Twiller,

and you just don't know what you had."

And it ended up by me owing him $2,600.

Ante up, gentlemen.

And that was back in 1926, and that was a lot of dough

and it took me about 6 months to pay it off.

Doc, ante, please.

You can win that much in this game if you hold the best hand.

We've been playing fine. This game's getting good.

CHARLIE: You just keep on playing, everything's going to be okay.

You talk with your cards and start breaking.

She owes me a blackjack.

I won $7,000 more.

I lost the rhythm of the game. I'm going to play some blackjack.

Seven thousand dollars, more?

$18,000. Ooh, lucky man.

I'm a rich man. I should say you are.

You're being kibitzed by a very wealthy man.

Good luck.

CHARLIE: I'm going to tell you, Chester,

you just hang on to your cards.

$18,000. Boy!

Money plays. $18,000.

Oh, William, you're... What a streak.

You put me in the game, okay? Put me in, I'll go play poker

and you can knock this table... What are you gonna play with?

Well, you're going to give me some of my money.

Now you're going to give me some money.

William, I'm just... I got no nails.

I'm going to throw... A 10!

How could you do a 10 like that?

Oh, please, never bust nothing.

I guess you think I did that?

I come over here and sit, and you're gonna lose.

I'm having a nervous breakdown. The money can't do me nothing

'cause I ain't got none. Just, just keep on winning, okay?

CHARLIE: Jimmy, can I get a little credit here?

A little credit here?

What do I gotta do to have credit?

HOUSEMAN: Go to the cashier.

Oh, yeah, he said I couldn't go there anymore.

CHARLIE: How do I get a $1000? I want $1000.

¶ Just an old sweet song

¶ Keeps Georgia on my mind

¶ Oh, keeps Georgia on my mind

¶ Georgia

¶ Georgia

¶ A song of you

¶ Comes as sweet and clean

¶ Yeah

¶ Other arms reach out for you

¶ Other eyes smile tenderly

¶ Still in peaceful

¶ Dreams I see

¶ The road leads back

¶ It leads back to you and me, I said

¶ Georgia, oh, Georgia

¶ No peace

¶ On my mind

¶ Keeps Georgia

Well, you know something I do.

¶ On my mind

¶ Whoa, on my mind ¶

Like my jargon.

Hey, thank you.

Hey, Bill, what's happening? Why did you disappear from the blackjack?

Is that all that's left of our money? All that cash?

How're you doing? Very good.

What's very good? How much did you win?

What do you have... I did very good.

Very good could be something or nothing.

What is happening? It bounced out of 22!

What the hell is that? What do you want to know?

Ask me now, what you want to know. You're over here, ask me!

Ask me what it is you want to know.

What do you want to know?

Bounced out of 22. That's right.

Will you get out of here?

I mean, you're gonna kill the streak!

¶ You're mean to me

¶ Why must you be mean to me?

¶ Gee, honey

¶ It seems to me ¶

Nobody's drinking this. I'll bet a milky way.

Sorry, sir. The limit's a dollar.

You just finish this hand, and then you'll see.

You'll want to bet a milky way. You're liable to get hungry.

Twenty-nine is not mine!

CHARLIE: How much money is in there if he wins?

I'll take $1 million on the field and I'm coming.

Twenty-six. 26.

Come on, 26.

How many, uh... How much are those chips worth exactly?

Do you mind? How's my field coming

with my lucky milky way on the field?

Give me a field on the hard way.

That's $100 a number.

Where's my lucky...

That's all.

Twenty-six! Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

Twenty-six!

We gotta shoot craps.

William, I'm not going to get in your way no more.

You go and shoot craps.

Wait a second, you come with me.

No. No, I'm shooting, you're betting.

CHARLIE: I'll bet $100 on 11.

Okay, that stuff will just wash the dice off.

MAN: Number 11.

Okay, okay, okay, 11.

CROUPIER: 12, your line away.

Look, maybe I ought to go.

No, no, you stay right here.

Charlie, now you stay right here.

And we start now.

Okay, we start now.

Okay, table, we're starting now.

I got it, Charlie. I got it, Charlie.

Let me see it.

Nine the winner.

He's got us out there, William.

I never saw so many bumble-bee chips in my life.

Hundred dollar chips. They give us real money for this, huh?

Number one now!

Numbers, numbers!

Easy eight, okay.

Eight, it is eight!

Okay, that's number two.

BILL: Come on, come on. Let's have the dice.

Come on, we're all with you, everyone.

Don't worry now.

Numbers.

Eight! Eight, eight, eight!

Give me a pair of 4s.

A pair of fours and I'll shit in my drawers.

Put your money on double four, lady.

This man's going all the way.

Five hundred dollar chips! I never saw $500 chips.

Seventy-five!

Three 11's in a row.

I wanna bet a million dollars. 14-to-one.

CHARLIE: You making that kind of money? You bet I am.

Don't distract the man. Just stay right on the table, William.

Eleven. Four 11's in a row.

The man just rolled four 11s in a row.

Where's my $14 million? I meant what I said.

$1 million on the line for an eleven.

Oh.

Nine!

Nine! Nine! The man rolls nines, eights, sixes

Wake up the world, William.

Roll these numbers till it comes down.

Aren't you going to change the pit guys now?

You guys aren't getting tired, are you?

Hard six.

You get a hard six, they'll put your picture up here.

Try it. Hard six.

Hard eight. Come on.

Hard six.

CHARLIE: Have you ever seen a greater roll than this?

I think you're not gonna believe what I've seen.

CHARLIE: This the biggest one you ever see?

CROUPIER: Almost.

Almost? We gotta make it the biggest one.

Five!

Ooh, five!

William.

Excuse me. Can I put a dollar on number seven?

CHARLIE: What is that? One dollar on a seven.

Here, lady, you got $100 to get out of town.

Give that lady $100, tell her to go play that, all right?

Come on, shoot. Shoot.

Nine.

Come on, 66. 66.

I don't believe it.

MAN: You won't be here next game.

That's right. That's your comeback.

You are the shooter.

Well, man, okay.

All right, I'll pass the dice to the lady.

Okay. You are the shooter, ma'am.

MAN: Let's go check out.

Is that the longest roll you ever been here for?

That man is unconscious. That's what they say.

Don't you go grabbing none of these. How many points?

WOMAN: Could you buy us a drink?

Here. Give this to the sweeper.

Thank you very much.

Excuse me, excuse me. Sorry.

Excuse me. Excuse me, excuse me, please.

WOMAN: Hey.

There he is. No, we's about even now.

He's in there.

Oh, William, William, William, William.

¶ I've got the world on a string

¶ Sitting on a rainbow ¶

Whoa, these chips, they're just falling out.

William, you okay?

I suddenly got very tired.

I know, I could see that. I was amazed.

You walked away from the table and you left all your chips.

But I scooped them up.

I'll tell you what we're gonna do.

We'll get a suite, a couple of outfits, some new clothes.

Maybe we'll hit the old mustang ranch, right?

We'll get a couple of little ladies. Have a ball, right?

Then maybe we'll come down, go to Vegas,

hire a limousine, get a driver,

hit every track in the world. Right?

We haven't even started yet, Mr. Denny.

I haven't even picked up the dice.

You just showed me how to win, right? Conviction, right?

Conviction and control.

I'm going to take a rest. You and me are going to rest up,

then we're back to the tables and I'm gonna be hitting it now this time, too.

First, I gotta empty my pockets.

Just chock-full of all these here chips.

I'll go to the cashier now and pick up a little cash.

You just sit right there and take it easy.

¶ La cucaracha, la cucaracha

¶ Just Billy and me ¶

I've got a fortune right here, fellows.

You'd better call for some money.

We got a lot of money here.

Keep everybody back. Everybody back.

Have a pretzel.

We have pretzels all over the place.

Rack them up.

Call Howard Hughes and tell him

we're gonna break his bank, too.

You can do me a favor. I got a hole in my shoe.

You know where I can get this fixed?

No, I'll cash my shoe in, too.

You give me something for that?

CASHIER: No, we don't give nothing for old shoes.

Don't drop no chips down on the floor, now.

What do you think we got here? How much money we got?

I think we got, uh, quite a few here.

I just need a... ...any help with the money.

Well, I got a lot of pockets.

Now I want a very good smile. I want a smile from you.

Eighty two thousand on the button.

New shoes.

Cheese and crackers!

Forty thousand dollars.

You see, I've been shooting crap games.

Smile, now. You ain't smiling. That's right.

Well, now you tell Mr. Hughes that

we're gonna break the rest of his things, too.

Look, how much is that now?

That's $60,000, sir. $60,000, sir.

I've been shooting. I have a knack with numbers.

I just, you know... Crap happens to be one of my games.

Don't want to take advantage of the house and win too much.

Seventy thousand. Seventy thousand.

Four, six...

It is unreal, but it's $80,000.

Eighty-two thousand. Eighty-two thousand.

Thank you very much. We'll probably see you again. And, uh...

Excuse us. Pathway, please.

No, I don't need any police. No, ain't nobody taking this money from me.

William, $82,000. William, $41,000 apiece.

Gonna split it up right now, all right?

Two, four, six, eight, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, for you.

Two, four, six, eight 10, 12...

Those people there, they want autographs, they want to take pictures.

The Reno Gazette, they want to do a whole feature story,

but I said, "no, no, we're going to be resting until we come back." right?

Okay, $40,000.

$41,000.

Make sure of this. Even split.

Eight, nine and 10.

Forty-one thousand. $41,000. You always take a big win this hard?

Charlie, there was no special feeling. I just said there was.

Yeah, I know that. Everybody knows that.

Check this out. We're heroes here, right?

This lady, Norma Walker, works near the cashier, gave me this,

"If it takes a watermelon five minutes to water,

"how long will it take a sweet pea to pee?

As long as it takes a pair of dice to crap."

Mmm-hmm.

(SIGHS)

Don't mean a fucking thing, does it?

Charlie, I have to go home.

Oh, yeah? Where do you live?

I'll see you.

¶ Nothin' about me is going to be the same ¶

PIANO PLAYER: ¶ Pack up all CHARLIE: Pack up all your cares.

¶ My cares and woes 'cause

¶ Here we go

¶ We're going to sing it low

¶ Oh, my, my

PIANO PLAYER: They don't care. They don't care.

PIANO PLAYER AND CHARLIE: ¶ Oh, while somebody waits for me

¶ Sugar is sweet, so is he

¶ Oh, bye, bye, blackbird

PIANO PLAYER: We got a girl.

¶ No one here can love

¶ Or understand me

¶ Oh, what hard luck stories

¶ They are

CHARLIE: Sounds like the story of my life.

PIANO PLAYER: You're right.

¶ Make my bed and light my light

¶ I'm gonna arrive late tonight 'cause

¶ Blackbird, bye, bye

PIANO PLAYER: You wanna do a big finish?

¶ Bye, bye

¶ Oh, bye, bye ¶