Original subtitles

Sync by Hana.Bean & Brice www.Itfriend.ORG www.Addic7ed.com

All right. Now, the second place award for scholastic achievement

goes to Rocky Blue.

Yeah! Go, rock!

Thank you very much.

First place goes to Candy Cho.

Whoo.

Thank you, I love you. Go bulldogs!

Go bulldogs.

And now, the second place award for physical fitness

goes to

Rocky Blue.

Yeah! Go, rock!

Yeah, second place again.

Well, whoop-de-doo.

Indeed. Whoop-de-doo.

The first place goes to.

Candy Cho.

Thank you, I love you.

Go bulldogs!

Wow. (Clears throat) Now, our final award of the day,

the coveted community service award,

goes to the student who has tirelessly dedicated their time

to bettering our community.

But first, the runner up, Rocky Blue.

Go, Rocky! Yeah!

Seriously? Second place?

On Thanksgiving I personally cooked 300 turkeys.

My hands still smell like giblets.

I helped build four houses for habitat for humanity.

They only needed two! Michelle Obama hugged me on the local news.

That must be exciting. Thank you.

Now, the first place goes to...

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get it. Candy Cho. Go bulldogs!

♪ Everybody, everybody, get out on the floor

♪ it can get a little crazy when the kick hits the 4

♪ make a scene, make a scene, nobody can ignore

♪ don't knock it till you rock it we can't take it no more

♪ bring the lights up, bust the doors down

♪ dust yourself off shake it up, shake it up

♪ dj set it off, take it up a notch

♪ all together now, shake it up, shake it up

♪ sh-sh-sh-shake it up you got to change it up

♪ and when you've had enough sh-sh-sh-shake it up

♪ bring the lights up, bust the doors down

♪ all together now, shake it up, shake it up

♪ shake it up ♪

Sync by Hana.Bean & Brice www.Itfriend.ORG www.Addic7ed.com

What is wrong with you?

You know why these ribbons are red?

Because red means, "stop!

"You're never going to be as good as candy stinkin' cho."

Oh, look. It's gunther and Tinka.

Ooh, we are cool because we have our names on our shirts.

She is mocking our accent. So original.

It doesn't bother us. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Ha, ha, water off a duck's butt.

Ha, ha, water off a duck's butt.

Seriously, we are not upset.

Seriously, we are not upset.

Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

You two are driving me crazy!

That was a good one.

I mean, you're right. She's awful.

Ooh, that girl steams my clams.

Because you let her.

Don't give her that power, Rocky. It just takes away from our time

where we talk about my problems.

♪ Ready? Okay!

♪ I'm Randy. ♪ I'm candy.

♪ We're in the talent show

♪ the same show we've won three years in a row

♪ telephone! ♪ hello?

♪ Here's what we know

♪ you're the worst you'll be the first to have to go

♪ hang up now bye

♪ bye

♪ bye, buh-bye ♪

- Whoo! (Giggles) - Go bulldogs!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You are not competing against her.

Yes, I am. Come on, I have to beat her just once.

No, you don't, Rocky.

You're a dancer on shake it up Chicago.

You already won. You already got first place.

Let's go out and buy you a ribbon. Yay, Rocky!

You're right, I'm not going to compete against her.

Good for you.

We're going to compete against her.

Well, at least I'll finally have a shot at getting second place at something.

I'll get it!

Looks like I won.

- Who is it? - Deuce.

Deuce who?

How many deuces do you know?

I will ask the questions!

Just open the door.

- Hey, what's up? - What's up, man?

Rocky and Cece here?

Why? Do you love them?

Ooooh!

How much candy did you give him?

I need to talk to them about the talent show.

Dude, talent shows are totally lame.

The only thing worse than the talent is the emcee.

I wonder what brainless fool got stuck with that idiotic job this year.

That would be me.

Hey, good for you!

Really? Talent shows don't seem like your kind of thing.

Why not?

It has the word "talent" in it.

Come on. It's our time to rehearse.

How much longer are they going to be?

Gunther, Tinka, hurry it up!

We still have the stage for five more minutes.

Don't get your panties in your lunch!

Good evening, ladies, gentlemen and babies.

I am gunther.

And I am Tinka.

And we are...

The hessenheffers!

We will now sing you the most popular holiday song from our country.

♪ I'm getting a goat for christmas

♪ he has hooves and a furry white face

♪ he'll sleep in my bed while I kiss his head

♪ I'm getting a goat for christmas

♪ nah, nah, nah!

♪ Well, I got a goat for christmas

♪ he didn't work out very well

♪ he kicked papa in the head and he pooped in the bed

♪ now I'm eating a goat for christmas

♪ nah, nah, nah! ♪

well, isn't it great?

♪ Nah, nah, nah! ♪

oh, that was priceless.

Meaning nobody would pay to see it.

I feel like you owe us $10.

If you're done humiliating yourselves and anyone within earshot,

our group is waiting to practice.

Go bulldogs!

Did you see that? There's six of them.

Six always beats two. That's basic math,

which I took second place to candy.

We need more dancers!

I guess we could always join up with gunther and Tinka.

Yeah, (Stutters) That's not such a terrible idea.

You know, for a smart girl, you really miss a lot of sarcasm.

Okay, bottom line: Your music is terrible

and you look like you should be on the cover of a hot chocolate box, okay?

So, why don't the four of us join forces, dance together

and beat the pom-poms off candy and Randy?

It is an intriguing offer.

Combine our talent and style with their admittedly fabulous hair.

Thank you.

Yes. I'd say you have the second most beautiful hair in all of school.

Cheap shot.

Couldn't resist.

So you in?

We're in.

I am gunther.

And I am Tinka.

And I am Rocky.

And I am Cece.

And we're gonna win, baby!

Okay, if you're going to emcee,

you have to really grab a crowd.

Magic tricks are always a winner.

All right. I like magic. Magic's good. Yeah.

Now, is this your card?

- No. - Aw.

Mmm... is this your card?

- No. - Aw.

Gee, I guess this trick doesn't work.

Unless...

Is this your underwear?

How'd you do that?

Impressed?

Would you say I

knocked your socks off?

Okay, let's move on to another trick before I wind up naked.

Yeah, nobody wants to see that.

Hey guys, don't forget.

Right after school, we're meeting at my place to rehearse.

Actually, we have great news to tell you.

Randy and candy asked us to perform with them!

What? How is that good news?

Oh, we meant to say we have terrible news for you but great news for us.

We will be on the winning team. Whoo!

So wait, you guys are just dropping us?

Like a hot tomato.

♪ Come on, get real

♪ here's the new deal

♪ you never had a chance

♪ now they're joining us to dance

♪ ding dong ♪ who's there?

♪ The first place team

♪ you're in the race for second place

♪ it's rocky's bad dream

♪ go bulldogs! ♪

oh! (Squeals) Ooh!

I give up, she wins!

Candy is just better than me at everything.

That's not true, Rocky.

You're better at picking best friends!

Wow. So you're actually trying to make me feel better

by complimenting yourself?

Yes.

But only to buy time until I came up with a plan.

Oh, no. Not a Cece plan.

Oh, yes! We are going to beat them.

How?

With a secret weapon.

Ty's our secret weapon?

All we have to do is get him to dance with us.

Yeah, he'll agree to that.

Right after he joins the mathletes.

Right after he accepts our grandma's friend request.

Right after he passes by a mirror and doesn't stop to look and go...

"Hey, good-looking."

You just relax, and let Cece do what Cece does.

Ty, please dance with us in the talent show.

Ty, please, please, please.

Look, I'm sorry, but there's nothing you could do or say

to make me be in that dumb talent show.

Ty, I didn't wanna have to go this far

but I do want you to remember, I have

the picture.

Mom says she burned that picture.

That's what she told you.

But the truth is, she gave it to me

because she knew that there would come a day when I would need it.

And, uh, today is that day.

You're bluffing.

Ha! Am I?

Well, then I guess this isn't a picture of a 7-year-old boy

trick-or-treating as princess Leia.

She led the rebellion! She was cool!

Oh, please.

I wonder how cool the kids at school will think it is

when it's taped to everybody's locker.

So what're you thinking? Hip-hop? Old-school? Salsa? I'm in.

May the force be with us.

You need a mint.

♪ Sh-sh-sh-shake it up! ♪

this is a sure-fire opener.

Everyone loves an escape artist act.

Okay. What do I do first?

Spit out that key you were holding in your mouth.

I was supposed to hold it in my mouth?

Oops.

Oh, boy.

This trick is going to take a lot longer than we thought.

I'll go get some bran and some prunes.

Hey! Where you going? Get me out of this.

All right, all right.

Keep your pants on!

Seriously, how do you do that?

Okay, give me my pants.

- Give me my pants. - Uh-oh.

Give me my pants!

Give me my pants! Whoa! Don't eat me!

Good evening and welcome to the j. Hughes high talent show.

I'm your host, Deuce Martinez.

Now, let me tell you a little about myself.

Uh, my family is originally from Cuba.

Um, I like to play video games.

What am I forgetting? Oh, yeah. I have two heads.

Hi, everybody! Little head's up,

I'm Deuce two.

It's good to be here tonight instead of stuck in Deuce's armpit.

Hey, Deuce one, I thought we had a double date tonight?

We did, but one of her heads had a headache.

Sorry, I'm a little thirsty.

Oh, why didn't you just say so?

A little bubbly water?

Don't mind if I do.

Hey, pretty funny, huh?

I'm not speaking to you.

Why? What did I do?

I heard you've been talking behind my back.

All right, I'm busted.

What have you been saying?

That you've been getting a big head.

Ah, get off my back.

Oh, no, I totally forgot.

Ow!

What?

We got to bring out the first act.

Who is it?

Ow!

Great, now we're going to have a heads-ache.

And now, please give it up for dustin Morris

as he armpit farts lady gaga's pokerface.

Hello, Randy and candy. Check us out.

We have come up with our own cheer.

♪ Who's that hiding behind my back?

♪ This bulldog! This bulldog!

♪ Who's that scratching behind your ear?

♪ This bulldog! This bulldog!

♪ Yes, yes, yes we do!

♪ We have sparkles, how 'bout you? ♪

yeah, little change in plans.

You're out.

You didn't really think we were going to let you perform with us, did you?

Up until a second ago, yes.

Now I am not so sure.

We just didn't want you teaming up with Rocky and Cece,

'cause you actually might have had a chance of beating us.

♪ Don't you cry, don't you dare ♪

♪ oh, go ahead, we don't care ♪

delivery for the hessenheffers!

I'll sign that!

♪ You're losers! You're losers! You're losers! ♪

I know they are calling us losers,

but they do it in such an entertaining fashion that it's infectious.

Who do you think's gonna win tonight, Deuce two?

I can't pick a winner. I can't even pick my own nose.

And now, you've seen them at football games,

you've seen them at basketball games,

they've made up rhymes about the magical changes going on in your body...

Randy, candy and the bulldog bunch!

Wow, did you just see what I just saw?

Of course I did, what choice do I have?

They were really good, but now I got that song stuck in my head.

Well, keep it there, I don't want it stuck in mine.

Ladies and gentlemen, Rocky, Cece...

And their special guest, ty.

And third place goes to

Kathy medina and her autoharp tribute to katy Perry!

Hey, Deuce, I hear you kissed a girl, and she didn't like it!

And now we're down to our top two.

Randy, candy and the bulldog bunch,

and Rocky, Cece and ty.

Drum roll, please.

And the winner of the j. Hughes talent show is...

Wait! I have something to say.

Is this show really about winning?

Tonight it is. You're going down.

Or is it about showcasing our god-given talent?

This is about a community coming together.

A celebration about being a bulldog.

Weren't we all born winners?

I would like to suggest that we throw out these petty titles.

We're all winners tonight.

Deuce, tear up that envelope!

You tear that, and I will kill the both of you.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Candy, that is a wonderful idea.

Thank you for teaching us all a darn good lesson.

Everyone, let's hear it for Candy Cho!

She sure comes in first at not being selfish.

Candy. Candy. Candy. Candy.

Tonight, everyone is a winner!

Whoo!

Hey! Ow!

Candy stinkin' cho.

Right. I agree, everyone's a winner!

Go bulldogs! Yeah!

Wait, wait. There is still one more act

that will surely blow your lederhosen off!

One, two, three, four.

♪ Go to bed, go to bed my little sleepy head

♪ you might not have sweet dreams

♪ your Uncle is a werewolf

♪ I hope you don't hear him scream

♪ he lives down the street, he has furry feet

♪ he's really quite sweet, when he doesn't want meat

♪ your Uncle is a werewolf

♪ a-woooo! ♪

oh... they're singing along.

I love you, chicanes.

I think I like it.

♪ Sh-sh-sh-shake it up ♪

♪ Shake it up ♪

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